I came across this video of Steve Jobs giving the 2005 Stanford Commencement Speech and wanted to share it.

He talks about trusting that everything will work out and not settling for less than what you truly love in both your personal and professional life - revelent advice no matter your age or place in life. He makes a moving point about death and the need to let your heart and intuition, not the opinions/expectations of others, guide your choices.

What a beautiful message about the importance of courage and possibility!

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Think big.

Do bigger.

Trust yourself.

Trust your gut feelings. 

Trust that it will work out. 

It will work out if you trust yourself.  

Your gut feeling is generally spot on.

Most people are good.

We have more in common than we think.

Home is not a place, but a feeling.

Big risks lead to big rewards (except for when betting).

The less you have, the more free you are. 

Planning is overrated and hardly necessary.

Age is irrelevant.

The sky is bigger in some parts of the world...

And so are the possibilities. 

My thoughts after 5 months traveling.     

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Going into 2010 I had no idea what the New Year (and decade) had in store, but I was sure that it would be amazing! (Besides the fact that 2009 was one of the hardest years of my life, so anything had to be an improvement...) I decided to take lots and lots of time for myself to figure out my next move.

And it turned out I literally decided to move... to a place on the other side of the world where I’ve never been, and previously never really had a desire to visit. But through a random(?) series of events it was becoming more and more clear that I should go, and go sooner rather than later.

Now I’m standing on the edge of 2011 having sold 98% of my belongings, leaving a comfortable (and pretty awesome) life behind with only a vague idea of what’s to come. I have a series of one-way tickets that over the course of January will take me from the life I’ve built in the American Midwest to remote Western Australia.

This isn’t a quest to “find myself.” If I was unsure about who I am, I don’t think I’d be brave enough to take off on my own. I want to be a citizen of the world. I want to know what it’s like to live outside of the U.S. I want to know empathy and fulfillment and love. I want to dwell on the edge of my comfort zone. I’m ready for an adventure.

So many people have told me how they could never do what I'm doing. And maybe that's the case... if for no other reason than an open-ended trip around the world might not be the thing you want the most. But if you take the time to figure out what it is that you desire to do more than anything else in this world, I'd be willing to bet that you could do that. The possibilities are endless! 

I found the following excerpt in Bill Bryson's "I'm A Stranger Here Myself: Notes on Returning to America After Twenty Years Away," and thought it was especially appropriate for this post, my adventure and the New Year: 

Take a moment from time to time to remember that you are alive. For endless eons there was no you. Before you know it, you will cease to be again. And in between you have this wonderful opportunity to see and feel and think and do. 

There are five billion other people on this planet, every one of them just as important, just as central to the great scheme of things, as you are. Don't ever make the horrible, unworthy mistake of thinking yourself more vital and significant than anyone else. 

Don't ever do anything on principle alone. If you haven't got a better reason for doing something other than the principle of the thing, then don't do it. 

Whatever it is you want to do in life, do it. There is nothing worse than getting to old age and saying, "I could have played second base for the Boston Red Sox but my dad wanted me to study law." Tell your dad to study law. You go climb Everest. 

Don't make the extremely foolish mistake of thinking that winning is everything. There is no shame in not winning. The shame is in not trying to win, which is of course another matter altogether. Above all, be gracious in defeat. 

Don't cheat. It's not worth it. Don't cheat on tests, don't cheat on your taxes, don't cheat on your partner, don't cheat at Monopoly, don't cheat at anything. Cheating is simply not worth it. 

Strive to be modest. It is much more becoming. 

Be happy. It's not that hard. You have a million things to be happy about. 

You have your whole life ahead of you. But here's the thing to remember. You will always have your whole life ahead of you. That never stops and you shouldn't forget it. 

I sincerely hope that 2011 brings you an abundance of peace, love, joy and adventure. Be brave. Be bold. Be nice. Love life. And most importantly, Never Settle! 

Cheers!  

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For the past six months I've been planning my escape to Australia. I figured I'd save up some money for a year or so and then take off for the Outback and never look back. 

Then life happened, plans changed and all of the sudden I didn't have a job. Deep down I knew the timeline for my trip had just moved up considerably. I contemplated my options if I stayed in Omaha. I could do some freelance writing and get certified to teach yoga (both things I'd been putting off because of my full-time job). I thought about finding short-term contract work or trying to work for the non-profit I volunteered with. 

People kept asking what I would do about my trip. Did I have enough money saved? Would I leave sooner? I devoted an entire day to contemplating what I should do.

I knew I had to just go for it! I'd never have a cleaner break, and more importantly I'd always be able to find excuses to wait. There would always be some interesting, lucrative opportunity or event that I'd be missing out on. I called my immediate family and best friends to break the news. I figured once I'd said it out loud I was committed. 

My best friend said she wasn't surprised and then immediately asked for the bookshelf in my living room. My dad said he'd learn to use Skype. My sister was pissed that I'd miss her 21st birthday. My guilt was quickly tempered by the fact that she missed my 21st birthday. So what if she was only 14... My mom cried. My brother was excited to have a place to crash in Australia. Overall, everyone was extremely supportive. 

The last couple of weeks have been a whirlwind. It's been really exciting and occasionally terrifying. I have no idea what the future holds, but for the first time in my life I'm in a position to do exactly what I want, whenever I want, wherever I want... and the possibilities are endless. 

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"Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music."  

--- Angela Monet

Be sure in your steps even if you're the only one who can feel the rhythm in your soul. It's easy to get discouraged when others don't share (or can't understand) your vision. But keep it up and eventually you just might win the ultimate dance off that we call "life". At the very least you'll always be at an awesome dance party!

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I've been called a perfectionist and an overachiever more than once in my life. It's just my nature. A big part of it is that I don't like to disappoint people. 

I, like most perfectionists, want to do it all and be everything to everyone. And, (at least I think) I usually manage to pull it off. But I'm tired. I'm talking really tired...most of the time.

I think my biggest downfall is that I hate to say "No." Don't get me wrong, I do it, but I almost always feel guilty about it. If someone asks me for something, even if it's a simple invitation for a cocktail (Ok, especially if it's an invitation for a cocktail) I generally accept. 

Combine my reluctance to say "No" with the fact that I'm one of the most social people on the planet and the result is that I maybe get 2 days/nights during any given month to do exactly what I want...No obligations to anyone else. 

Lately, I've begun to realize that this ratio of time devoted to others vs. time devoted to me has to change. I can't continue to run on empty just because I don't want to disappoint others. My hunch is that the people who matter the most to me will understand. No guilty feelings necessary. 

I don't think this will be an easy transition, but I feel it is a necessary one. As I said in my post Never Settle!, if you don't take the time to put yourself first, then who else will?

This is my vow to make, and when necessary to take, time for myself in a quest to live a more balanced and fulfilled life. I hope that you will, too. 

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I'm willing to bet that all of us have heard (or said) this line at some point in our lives. We use this line when we're trying to soften the blow of rejection. When we're trying to justify our actions and lead others to believe that whatever is happening is not their fault.

We use this line when there are feelings on the line. When we're trying to take the blame so that we don't feel bad about potentially hurting someone else's feelings. But has hearing this ever actually made anyone feel better?

I think that anyone on the receiving end who truly believes this statement, already believed it before the other person said it. You're either good at rejection or you're not. You either understand that it's not always about you and things don't happen according to your plans (and desires) a lot of the time...or you don't. 

I think accepting rejection is an integral part of finding contentment in one's life. Don't think of rejection as a bad thing, but as an opportunity to practice resiliency....an opportunity to learn, grow and become stronger as a person. Rejection builds character.

 I'm proud to be a REJECT, and hopefully you are too!  

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I'm excited to share a new project I'm working on! It's a website devoted solely to my travels - photos, stories of the people I meet, resources, etc. I'll write about my preparations for my departure to Australia over the next year. 

Check it out here. I hope you enjoy!

"That is the charm of a map. It represents the other side of the horizon where everything is possible." -- Rosita Forbes  

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No really, I already have everything I need....and odds are you do too.

This has been my mantra for quite some time now, but over the last year I've really begun to internalize it. I'm a pretty simple person. I'm easily entertained and material things have never been that important to me. 

Of course there are things I like to indulge myself with (handbags, good wine and beer), however I've never owned a brand new car or piece of furniture. I never pay full price for anything and I love second-hand stores.

Beyond material things, I've learned that most of what I need in life I can provide for myself. Often times we look to external things (people, money, stuff, drugs, alcohol, sex) to fulfill our wants and "needs". But if we aren't fulfilled from within none of these things will ever be truly satisfying and the effects will be fleeting.

External validation is nice every now and then, but it's so much more rewarding when that validation is just reinforcing what we already know about ourselves, not defining our existence.

Gratitude has played a very important role in my journey of acceptance. In my earlier post on Gratitude I offered some practical steps for exercising gratitude in your life. The more I've focused on what I have as opposed to what I want or don't have, the more I've realized that I already have everything I need.

Furthermore, because I feel that all my needs are met, I'm better able to share and give of myself to those around me. Which has become especially important for me as I prepare to leave Omaha for good and travel the world next year.

I'm not a religious person, but I do believe (and my personal experience has shown) that the universe provides you with the means to fulfill your true needs. Unfortunately most people overlook this because they're too distracted obsessing over what they think they don't have. 

If you focus on being grateful instead of the things you want and don't have I think you may be surprised to find that you too already have everything that you need. 

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I'm in the process of preparing for an around-the-world adventure after my mom's wedding in Costa Rica next year. I've never really been one to travel alone, so I thought I'd better try it out to make sure that I enjoy it.

I'm headed to San Francisco for a 3-day workshop for my job in August and it seemed like the perfect opportunity to stay for the rest of the week and explore on my own. I've heard great things about Airbnb and I was anxious to try it out. I found a beautiful cottage in Sonoma.

I sent my would-be host a message introducing myself and telling her about my plans for my visit and also about my future travels. We exchanged a few more messages and the deal was done. I was all set to stay in the cottage.

Then, to my surprise I received this Email from Airbnb:

Hello Stefanie,

I was going through our pending reservations and came across your message thread with Denise. (don't worry, we're not spies we just go through pending reservations messages to check the status of the communication :)

I was very excited to see that you are planning a two year trip to Australia and beyond! (I found your blog) Anyway, this is very exciting and inspiring. So we really want to show our support!

I've created a special coupon just for you. It will be good for $100 towards a reservation starting next year. When you decide to book use your code at check-out.

Have an amazing journey and let us know how it goes :)

Warmest Regards,

Daniel

I was blown away! I couldn't believe it. I hadn't even made my trip yet and already I was in love with Airbnb! Not only was my name spelled correctly (which never happens), but this person had actually taken the time to find my blog and read about my travel plans.

I had already planned to use Airbnb throughout my travels (both near and far), but this definitely ensures that I will use them again. And now here I am touting their praises to all of you! Well played, Airbnb. Kudos to your extraordinary customer service!

Never underestimate the power of taking the time to add a personal touch (in business and personal relationships). A little bit of effort and attention can go a long way in creating genuine connections.

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Experimenting with effects: 

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Often times we strive (in vain) for control in our lives. We try to plan out every detail, 

So we know what to expect.

So we can mitigate risk.

So we can avoid getting hurt.

So we can determine the path of least resistance. 

Well, whatever the reasoning, I can tell you from personal experience that it doesn't work. Struggling (and it is a struggle) to control everything in our lives only leads to more stress, disappointment and heartache. We're upset when we perceive that we've lost control (or really just when things don't go our way). Which is kind of silly if you think about it, because control is only an illusion. We can't control what happens in our lives. 

And when you look at the definition of control, why would you even want to?

Control - to exercise restraint over; to eliminate or prevent the flourishing or spread of

I say, live life without restraint and flourish! 

Perhaps it would be more beneficial to work towards gaining command in your life.

Command - to direct with specific authority or prerogative; to deserve and receive (respect, sympathy, attention); to have authority over and responsibility for 

I think it's much more feasible and rewarding to "have authority over and responsibility for" your life instead. And I especially love the idea of living life "to deserve and receive."

Exercise command by living with purpose, treating others how you want to be treated, taking responsibility for your actions and believing in yourself. We can't control what happens to us, but we can take command of our lives and play an active role in shaping the outcome. 

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I want to shoot better photos, so I've been taking a lot more of them in preparation for my travels. 

See the full gallery on Posterous

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Earlier this year I spent some time reflecting on the important role that Grace, Empathy and Patience play in our daily lives. And the opportunity that exists to enrich our interactions with others and shape our attitudes about ourselves (and others) in a more positive way by striving to possess these traits. 

I feel it's necessary to include another characteristic in this list:

Gratitude - the quality or feeling of being thankful

Devoting a little bit of time each day/week to appreciating the good things in your life can go a long way in adding/creating perspective. It's easy to dwell on the negative and let a few "bad" things overshadow the many good things in our lives. Making a conscious decision to express gratitude will increase positive thoughts which will surely elevate your (and others') mood and attitude. 

I like to spend a few moments reflecting on what I'm thankful for at the end of my yoga practice. I find it's really easy to do in that relaxed state of mind. Another favorite time for reflecting on gratitude is first thing when I wake up in the morning. I think of one or two things/people/opportunities I'm grateful for and come back to those thoughts throughout the day if I'm feeling discouraged, stressed out or upset. Beyond that, it's nice to start out the day on a positive note. 

I think we can all benefit from exercising gratitude in our lives more often and with enough practice it will eventually become habit. And why not make a small change that can have such a profound impact on you and those around you?

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Earlier this month I spent two weeks dogsitting in Dallas for my uncle. During my stay I used a GPS (TomTom to be exact) for the first time. 

Initially it was great. My uncle programmed several useful destinations - 24 Hour Fitness, my grandparents' house, the grocery store and airport - to make my navigation easier. I'd just hit the button and drive off into the sunset to the soothing soundtrack of TomTom's turn-by-turn directions.

This was all fine and dandy until my grandpa asked me for directions to a restaurant about a mile away from my uncle's house. I realized that even though I'd been driving around the neighborhood (and city for that matter) for almost a week, I had no idea how to get there. I'd been so dependent on the GPS for directions that I wasn't actually learning how to navigate at all.

I decided to stop using the TomTom and figure out how to get around on my own. As I began to rely more on myself and less on the GPS I realized how much of the city I'd been missing while focusing on that little glowing screen.

In my quest for direction I lost sight of the big picture. It's easy to just follow directions and blindly put one foot in front of the other as you listen to what others tell you to do. But you'll miss out on the learning opportunities and sense of accomplishment that come with making your own way.

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Dance as though no one is watching you, 

Love as though you have never been hurt before, 

Sing as though no one can hear you, 

Live as though heaven is on earth.

--- Souza 

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"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that's holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so that you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave."

--- Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat Pray Love

Recently, I was rereading parts of Eat, Pray, Love (a marvelous book BTW) and this passage really stuck with me. It challenged and expanded my notion of what the term "soul mate" actually means. Upon reflection, I realized that anyone I'd ever met whom I'd considered to be my soul mate absolutely fit this description.

I've been fortunate to meet more than one person I considered to be my soul mate, who came into my life at a point when I felt lost/confused/broken. I loved them and I was devestated to lose them, but the lessons they taught me about myself and how I want to live my life have, and will continue to far outlast our relationships.

They were hard lessons and hard losses, but I wouldn't trade those experiences for anything because each of those people have in some fundamental way shaped the person I am today.

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Last month I ran a marathon. More often than not, when I talk to people about it they say, "I could never do that!"

My response: "Yes, you could if you wanted to."

If you told me two years ago that I was going to run a marathon I probably wouldn't have believed you. Last year I decided to run a half marathon with Team in Training. Crossing the finish line in San Diego last June I knew immediately that I would run a full marathon. 

I'm not gonna lie, it wasn't easy. Training required lots of time, determination and sacrifice. There were plenty of days I didn't feel like running. There were injuries and ice baths. But I knew that every mile brought me one step closer to my goal.

Now I'm in the process of planning an extended around-the-world adventure, and I get the same reaction when I talk to people about it. They say "I wish I could do that." Again, my response is: "You could if you wanted to."

After running the marathon I truly believe that you can do (almost) anything if you want it bad enough and commit yourself to doing it. I say almost because you have to be somewhat practical about what you decide to do. I mean, I could probably never be a professional basketball player (considering I've never played basketball before and I'm only 5' 2"). 

Decide what you want and go for it. Don't say you could never do something before you've put a single ounce of effort into trying. Odds are you'll be surprised how far you can go if you just push yourself a little bit. 

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Risk more than others think is safe.

Care more than others think is wise.

Dream more than others think is practical.

Expect more than others think is possible.

 --- Cadet Maxim at West Point

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