@ Karaoles on R

The Fetishized Skins of Proto-human Kentuckians

2020-01-09T07:01:00.001-08:00

Well it was good to see the old gang in the old hole we used to know as Karaoles.

But wait! Has the old hole become the new Gastodive!? That is a big 10-4, good buddy!

While there is a shrine to some of the Legacy Characters including some of their holy relics, I would say the clientele has "evolved". Evolved from the proto-human Kentuckian throwbacks to Urban Millennials who apparently delight in cloaking in the fetishized skins of proto-human Kentuckians.

Turns out to mostly be the same thing without the language barrier and the underlying threat of sudden violence.

Most notable differences as a result of the gastrodive transition...

Wednesday!?
No bouncer! Given I didn't see anyone the entire night that had could have possibly thrown a punch in their lives, probably not a requirement any longer
Lots of branded collateral... coasters, etc "Karaoles Pub... since 1972..."
Complete modernized K ekuipment. Not a buggy integration of lousy hardware that we are accustomed to... but a streamlined integrated system complete with remote monitors with a projected line-up... and no slips - just a waiting-list style signup list with the new KG and an online "book". (The new KG probably deserves his own post)
A new crop of K regulars that are not us. Again probably a natural and positive transition. While they tend to be a bit more performance-oriented than I am comfortable, it seems to suit this new generation.
Decent food - due to its new gastrodive orientation.

In general it was a good evening with a good group and no evidence of Jamming so far

The Line Up
The Alien: Paint it Black (some more)
Lisa: Union City Blues (revitalized)
Chris: Ring of Far
Rhonda: (chose to sit this one out) - out of bewilderment, I assume
Ryan: “You Can Have the Crown” by Sturgill Simpson (and was literally crowned by KG)
Matt: (chose to sit this one out) - ditto
Sophie: (chose to sit this one out) - out of ironic bewilderment, I assume

See you next W @ K's

Yup got some tooth loss

2020-01-06T15:29:00.000-08:00

[inspired by Lizzo - Good as Hell]

Got some tooth loss
Skipped my bail
Maybe some skin peelin'?
Healing not so well

tooth loss

But out of jail
KG how'm I feelin'?
Feeling good as hell

Woo boy, tired of the bullshit
Goin to dust my numbers off, and K this R
Yes Lord, tryna get some new slips in there, "Like a Prayer", som that Madonna shit
Come now, call me K Guys
You know I'm not a star, but this is just a dive

Before I get barred let me have a try
If you need a grease, let me then comply

I'm be screamin my encore
As they kick my ass out the door

Yup got some tooth loss
Skipped my bail
KG how'm I feelin'?
Feeling good as hell
Tooth toss
But out of jail
KG how'm I feelin'?
Feeling good as hell
Feeling good as hell
KG how'm I feelin'?
Feeling good as hell

Woo boy, need to go to that Hell
Got to take a pee…

Should we K, or should we, no?

2016-02-22T09:44:00.000-08:00

[Inspired by The Clash - Should I Stay Or Should I Go ]

All'yas got to let me know
Should we K or should we, no?
If you're not sure - it will be fine
We'll all be home again sometime
So you got to let me know
Should we K or should we, no?

To avoid Zzzs Zzzs Zzzs
You need to take just one of these
It will be fine though hell is black
It would be best to avoid all that
Well come on an' let me know
Should we K or should we, no?

K @ K's this R?

Knowledge of Sh*tty Songs that Everyone was Already Happy to have Forgotten

2011-12-26T10:11:00.000-08:00

I am still a bit off balance by this whole thing... sorry I am late getting this out, but it has taken this long to process.... Did that guy really just do Orinoco Flow?

By that guy, I mean that guy right there... the large one... the vaguely Thespian one? W. O. W.

I didn't even realize anyone whose voice wasn't FIRST, heavily processed through a synthesizer and SECOND, had all the parts where you have to take a breath spliced out in the studio, could even approach that song, let alone do it in a Karaoles-like venue (i.e. crappy bar, crappy sound system, crappy CD+G arrangement, and no-talent wannabe "performers").

I gotta say he gets an "A" for "Audacity" but an "F" for "Trying hard but Still Falling off that Tight-rope"

W. O. W.

Otherwise a pretty tame night... that same guy continued to try to impress everyone with his Tenacious-D sensibilities and knowledge of sh*tty songs that everyone was already happy to have forgotten - but in the end he was a one-trick pony.

Jimmy was either mellow or separated from reality... or both.

It was good to see everyone though I did miss Barbie the Xmas Tramp.

The night was exceptional in that I must of dosed Lisa too much because we were the last ones to leave

The Line up that I Remember... Ah screw it... I really don't remember much past that Orinoco Flow incident

People should feel free to comment with what they remember...

A Kristmas Karaole

2011-12-12T04:23:00.000-08:00

(inspired by White Christmas)

I'm dreaming of a white trash Christmas

Just like all the ones before

Where Daddy's missin', and children listen

for him to stumble in the door

I'm dreaming of a white trash Christmas

With every tavern your Ma calls

May she find your Daddy to-night...

And may both your parents be home tonight!

12/22 has been christened as A Kristmas @ Karaoles.

Anybody interested in K @ K's on that R?

Uncanny Valley

2011-07-18T19:16:00.001-07:00

(Inspired by DOWN IN THE VALLEY)

Uncanny Valley, That's where I'm at.
Robots are freak-y, but Karaoles beats that.

There's Mrs jimmy, them eyes don't move right.
My brain just cain't parse that. I'm done eating tonight

Anyone care for K this R @ Ks.?

Happy Birthday

2011-05-06T08:12:00.000-07:00

We had a wonderful Birthday Celebration last night @ K's for K on R. Wonderful in a K kind of way. If "creepy" + "lecturous" +"old" + "drunken" >= "wonderful" then wonderful it was.

It was R's birthday and she said some very nice things that reminded me what a treat and privilege it is to know her.

Normally, I feel like the farm hands from Wizard of Oz - I am happy just to be invited in the house to stand in the back of the room awkwardly holding my hat and paying my respects.

It is gravy to also be included in the happy swirl of all the friends and goings on and for sweet things being said to remind me of the value of friendship.

I just will say, "Happy Birthday" , but I am really saying "thank you" for all the years of fun and friendship.

Signs, Wonders and Revelations

2010-08-06T16:12:00.000-07:00

Due to some top-flight sleuthing and reportage, Rhonda was able to ferret out some quality "info" about our Karaoling Lokale...

* BikerBouncer2 also goes by the handle, "Kevin"
* Marie is d-e-d, dead (!!)
* Jimmy also goes by the handle, "Jimmy Currie" - as in, "Mr. Currie I hope to never see you before this Court in the future!"
* Lil'Jimmy is 27 years young: Current Status: Unemployed (!!)
* The Restaurant down the street from Karaoles?: NO HOT DOGS (!!)
* The strip of Ashland in front of Karaoles?: NOT FIXED NEXT YEAR (!!)
* Bonus Fact: Jimmy is 68 (going on 69) and is still living (!!)

Truly Signs, Wonders and Revelations!

Otherwise a Our-Group-Dominated-Night - tight rotation, no gaps except for Matchbox Kenny, of course. No Characters - old, new or otherwise.

THE LINE UP
Ryan: DR. MY EYES, MIDNITE CONFESSIONS, I LOVE THE RAINY NIGHTS
Rhonda: 9 TO 5, CECELIA, PRIVATE EYES
The Alien: SWEET CAROLINE
Lisaf: CALL ME, I LOVE ROCKANDROLL, SURRENDER (duet with Chris)
Chris: ACT NATURALLY, LOVESICK BLUES, SURRENDER (duet with Lisaf)

See you next R for K @ K's!

No Threat, No Worries

2010-05-07T08:43:00.000-07:00

It turns out Special "No-Threat" Glasses really liven up a Birthday "Performance". However averting one's eyes does not avert the threat of a case of the High Life Flu.

No Worries. A small price to pay for a outstanding K session. While Jimmy was off and Little Lord Not Jimmy was bartending, Jimmlet did her best to keep things light. Even donning the Special "No-Threat" Glasses for some candid bartending shots. The fact that she ripped one of the earpieces off was compensated by an excellent bandaid-aided repair job! (And by some complementary Watermelon shots for the Birthday Gal).

Nice rotation, lots of our group up on "stage". It was a Birthday Gal All Request Night - so lots of old favorites were "performed" according to her exacting specifications.

We were struck by the lack of Characters present... really only Jimmlet and Mrs. Jimmy! I think this means that after all this time we have become the local color (??!!)

Other things of note:

Hell has had a make-over. New Plumbing (hillbillied of course - with the requisite hillbilling it more by erecting a fence to keep the drunks from climbing all over the hillbillied plumbing).

Jimmlet is 42 going on 402.

High Life can take on a semi-solid, viscous form when extruded, playdoh-factory style, out of your pores the next morning while sweating your way to work in a thunderstorm on your bike.

The LINE UP

The Alien: CRACKLIN ROSE, I'M TOO SEXY FOR MY SHIRT, FATBOTTOMED GIRLS (duet with Rhonda)
Katie: WHAT'S GOIN ON?, CECILIA, THE HUMPTY DANCE
Mark: THESE EYES (eye-theme)
Dave: BRANDY
Ryan: KEEP ON LOVIN YOU, PRIVATE EYES (eye-theme)
Rhonda: 9 TO 5, FATBOTTOMED GIRLS (duet with the Alien), BABY GOT BACK (in answer to katie's Humpy Dance)
Chris: FOLSUM PRISON BLUES, OKIE FROM MUSKOGEE

See you next R @ K's for K!

Where have all the flowers gone

2010-05-03T14:54:00.000-07:00

(Inspired by HAPPY BIRTHDAY)

Little Jimmy's been gone
No Slim Gimpy so far
Marie?, Droopie? and Soft Hands?
Per'chance we'll see them this R?!

All in for K @ K's this R for R's K-Day?

Mrs Jimmy sees You

2010-04-20T14:20:00.000-07:00

(Inspired by HAPPY BIRTHDAY)
Toothless Jimmy likes You
Mrs Jimmy sees(?) You
Matchbox Kenny, Calls Rhonda
Creepy KG scares You!

K @ K's 3 Rs from now (May 6th)?

Remind Me Again...

2010-04-09T09:28:00.000-07:00

(Inspired by ROCK AND ROLL by LED ZEPP'LIN)

It's been a long time since the last Karaole!
It's been a long time since I seen the Hell Hole!
Ooh, remind me again, remind me again, remind me again
mm-baby, where I come from
(ooh-ooh hoosier-tuky that's what I'm talkin' about)
It's been a long time, been a long time
Been a long thirsty, thirsty, thirsty, thirsty, song-less time
(Yes, it has)

K next R (4/15) @ K's?

Something Someone Should Bring to Karaole's Attention

2009-12-16T16:01:00.000-08:00

If she is awake/coherent...

"A federal judge has ruled the owners of six Tucson Chuy’s Mesquite Broiler restaurants must pay almost $49,000 for playing songs without permission." -- Link

It Doesn't Matter What you Call Him

2009-12-11T08:02:00.000-08:00

It has been a while. Many things have changed in the world but few of them have occurred within Karaoles. There is one notable exception: while we have been away a new force has moved in. It describes itself by many names and riddles, but we are invited to "call me 'Z'". 'Z' seems harmless enough until he notices there's a "womans" among you. Luck would have it, we had such a womans tucked into our huddle of "mens". Perhaps that is what drew 'Z' to us: to many "mens" and in too small a space to not contain a "womans" (?!).

"Zuver=Chris", "The Count", "My Mother's the Orthodox"... it doesn't matter what you call him as long as you don't call him "Late to the Party". 'Z' likes to celebrate life and embrace it fully... regardless of whether you want to be embraced by 'Z' or not. And if you shy from being embraced, then he can do you one better... He will offer to buy you unwanted drinks! THAT is the kind of guy 'Z' is.

Don't feel bad for shunning 'Z' because... a. He will not notice that you are or at least act like you are. And b. there is always a party to be had somewhere else in the room.

Here's to you 'Z' - just stay over there.

Jimmy was conspicuous in his absence. He apparently is having trouble "gittin' his medicines right" according to Mrs. Jimmy. The Doctors are "tryin' to get the levels right". A lot of the medical technical stuff went over my head, but let's hope he is better soon and back at the helm.

Otherwise not an exceptional night... lots of EMO Thespian Hipsters. Some may have been in actual costume in addition to actual ironic costume. Lots of cross-decade fashion references where worn and lots of smirks were exchanged in their celebration.

Some guy "got the Led Out" - as Mr. Brett observed and attempted WHAT IS AND WHAT SHOULD NEVER BE with mixed results and even more mixed reaction from the "audience"

Also next week is the last week for K this year... Matchbox Kenny let us know several times. So no Kristmas Eve K for you!

Until next time, all you mens and womans take care... and avoid 'Z' at all costs.

THE LINE UP

The Alien: (chose to sit this one out)

Rhonda: (chose to sit this one out)

Ryan: (chose to sit this one out)

Mr. Brett: GHOST RIDERS IN THE SKY (inspired and well received choice)

Chris: OH BOY, OKIE FROM MUSKOGEE

See you next year at K's

Staring blindly into space

2009-12-03T07:32:00.000-08:00

(Inspired by 25 OR 6 TO 4 by CHICAGO)

Waiting for my chance to K
Searching for something I won't slay
Flashing lights against my eye
Giving up, I close my eyes
Should I try to sing some more?
December 10th and I've done three or four

Staring blindly into space
Going to Hell to splash my face
Wanting just to stay awake
Wond'ring how much I can take
Should I try to sing some more?
December 10th and I've done three or four

Feeling like I ought to sleep
Spinning room is sinking deep
Searching for something I won't slay
Waiting for my chance to K

December 10th and I've done three or four
December 10th and I've done three or four

Who want's to K NEXT R (this December 10th) @ K's

Should I Try to Sing Some More?

2009-12-01T10:39:00.000-08:00

(Inspired by 25 OR 6 TO 4 by CHICAGO)

Waiting for my chance to K
Searching for something I won't slay
Flashing lights against my eye
Giving up, I close my eyes
Should I try to sing some more?
November 10th and I've done three or four

Staring blindly into space
Going to Hell to splash my face
Wanting just to stay awake
Wond'ring how much I can take
Should I try to sing some more?
November 10th and I've done three or four

Feeling like I ought to sleep
Spinning room is sinking deep
Searching for something I won't slay
Waiting for my chance to K

November 10th and I've done three or four
November 10th and I've done three or four

Who want's to K NEXT R (November 10th) @ K's

Forget about the Bad Smells, Oh Yeah

2009-11-30T07:05:00.000-08:00

(inspired by HOLIDAY by MADONNA)

Holi-K Inebriate
Holi-K Inebriate

If we took a holi-K
Took some time to Inebriate
Just one night out of life
It would be, it would be so nice

Everybody spread the word
We're gonna have a celeKation
Even Jimm-let at
her Wench's Station
It's time for the good times
Forget about the bad smells, oh yeah
One night to drink together
leads to MIS-AD-VENTURE!
We need a holi-K

Which Rs work from Whom this Holi-K Season?

Speak now or no ekcuses later!

K Offically Kalled OFF This Week

2009-10-21T09:43:00.000-07:00

Due to lack of participation...

See you next R for K @ K's

So Far, Underwhelming Response...

2009-10-21T07:09:00.000-07:00

No one has said, "yes'em"

A lot of people of said, "no thankya, 'mam"

Something to Brag at Work About

2009-10-20T06:09:00.000-07:00

(inspired by STRAWBERRY FIELDS FOREVER by THE BEATLES)

Let me put you in
cause a big group just came... in from Deerfield
They think it's a big deal
something to brag at work about
B96 songs forever...

Singing ain't easy in your Idol Pose
And surprise! Mariah Carey's hard to sing
It's hard to be someone you're not
but it all works out
No one's listening except me

Let me put you in
cause a big group just came... in from Deerfield
They think it's a big deal
something to brag at work about
B96 songs forever...

K this R @ K's anyone?

DUE TO LACK OF DEMAND

2009-10-13T06:46:00.001-07:00

We are waving K off until NEXT R...

There will be NO K this R @ K's

Next week, y'all!

Look for the hick with the light in his hands

2009-10-12T14:38:00.000-07:00

(Inspired by LUCY IN THE SKY WITH DIAMONDS by THE BEATLES)

Picture yourself on a stool by a redneck,
With five or six beers and under done fries.
Somebody calls you, you walk up quite slowly,
A guy with a microphone "Hi"s.

Video letters turn from yellow to green,
Tell you you're lagging behind.
Look for the hick with the light in his hands,
And he yawns

Jimmy won't be shining his flashlight,
Jimmy won't be shining his flashlight,
Jimmy won't be shining his flashlight,
Ah... Ah...

Anybody up for K this R @ K's?

LITTLE LORD NOT JIMMY was NOT an Acceptable Alternative

2009-08-21T13:07:00.000-07:00

PROS:

Our good friend Dawn graced her with her presence... And she brought her "A" Game with her - inspiring us all to new "heights"

It was a singers' night for sure. There was "Us" and there was "Them". Where "Them" consisted of a Bachelorette Party attended mostly by Ladies Who Love Ladies (LWLL). At one point Ryan and I and some Random Guy (if he was a guy) were the only Guys in the Place.

Another big plus, was a LWLL makeout session straight across the bar from us. nuzzling... smooching... public fondling (I can only assume, because I immediately averted my eyes modestly once I grasped the direction things were heading). In solidarity I offered to be snuggled by Ryan, but I was not taken up on the offer

In anycase, as you can see below... It was at times, an embarrassingly tight rotation... one after another we went up there on a virtual Matchbox Kenny conveyor belt.

CONS:

No Jimmy - that is right, Jimmy was "off". Has been for the last couple of days. Could it be Jimmy is losing the passion for handing yuppies and privileged college-aged young adults their ironic blue-collar beers?!

Another CON: with no Jimmy, there was the incongruently fey bartender behind the bar in his place. I would have loved to at least get a CATFISH or a LIL'JIMMY but LITTLE LORD NOT JIMMY was not an acceptable alternative... At least MRS JIMMY was there to keep us entertained guessing which one of us she was talking to.

And of course all were missed who could not make it... You know who you are.

THE LINE UP
Dawn: 9-TO-5 (duet with Rhonda), LETS GO CRAZY (duet with Rhonda), DEVIL WENT DOWN TO GEORGIA (duet with Rhonda)
Rhonda: 9-TO-5 (duet with Dawn), LETS GO CRAZY (duet with Dawn), DEVIL WENT DOWN TO GEORGIA (duet with Dawn)
Ryan: RAINY NIGHTS, TORN, (A Current Popular Song Whose Title I do Not know - "Something" DEEPLY)
Chris: YOUR CHEATIN HEART, TIGER BY THE TAIL, THE TIMES THEY ARE A CHANGIN, RING OF FIRE

See you Next R @ K's for K

What YOU can do for your Country Music Inn.

2009-08-19T06:38:00.000-07:00

"And so, my fellow Ameri-K-ins: ask not what your Country Music Inn can do for you - ask what you can do for your Country Music Inn."

"Is you is or is you ain't my Kaby?"

Anyone going to be K-ing this R @ K's?

Lisaf and myself are IN... I believe the Kokat Wunder Tvins are IN

I believe the Alien is off-world so is OUT

Anyone else?

Don't ask questions in Hell

2009-08-13T10:35:00.000-07:00

(Inspired by LET'EM IN by PAUL MCCARTNEY AND WINGS)

Someones peein' on the floor
You can tell from the smell
Don't ask what THAT was used for
Don't ask questions in Hell
Do me a favor,
Open the door, let air in

Little Jimmy, Cornbread too,
And Slim Gimpy, Magoo-san!,
Gulf War Syndrome, "Southern Blade",
Close the door, don't let them in!.

Someones smearin' on the wall
What it is, I can't tell
Boy, I wish there was a stall
There's no modesty in Hell

Do me a favor,
Open the door and let air in.

Anyone interested in K this next R @ K's (August 20). Rumor has it that someone's Sista will be in the Act this next R @ K's