Kids And Coping With ADHD

A New Facebook Group

2009-10-03T05:51:00.001+01:00

2009-06-25T10:18:00.002+01:00

This home education lark isn't getting any easier. Some days Kyle refuses point blank to do anything at all, and when he's in that mood absolutely nothing sways him. Threats don't work, rewards don't work, taking things away from him doesn't work, bribery doesn't work. It's really hard going on days like that.

Other days are better, he'll sit and watch documentaries on tv, do a few pages of English and Maths, then play some educational games on the pc.

Also having hellish problems with him not sleeping at night, he doesn't fall asleep until sometime between 2am and 3am on a good night, on a bad night he's up until 5am then sleeps until 11am!

Of course, being that I have to be constantly aware of what he's doing, it means I don't get a lot of sleep myself. I still have to be up at 7am to get Courtney all sorted and off to school, so every so often I feel totally burned out. We manage though, thankfully the bigger ones help me out every so often and watch Kyle so I can steal an hour or 2 of sleep in the afternoon. I don't think I could manage to function properly otherwise.

Anna

ADHD attention deficit hyperactivity disorder ADD ADH ADHD tips ADHD links adhd parenting adhd advice adhd tips adhd kids adhd resources coping with adhd

Long Time No See

2009-05-31T11:25:00.002+01:00

Wow, it's been ages since I updated anything here. I'm so sorry about that. Lots of things have been going on what with the illness I had, trying to find suitable things for Kyle to do, trying to sort out the other kids, a few miscarriages etc. I think things got on top of me a bit for a while, and when I finally got well again I didn't seem to have time to sit on the pc much.

The latest news is that me and Hugh are not together any more, things didn't quite work out there, but the good news is that the kids have taken it very well, even Kyle has taken it exceptionally well, so all is good in that respect.

I'll get back to updating about Kyle and his ADHD a bit more often now, will just have to check back to see where I left off.

Not to forget, the name of that pen in my last post is YoroPen, and it's fabulous ;)

Anna

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My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part Ten

2007-01-24T12:58:00.000+00:00

Ok, let's see if we can get back on track with the story of our life and dealing with ADHD.

The kids came home from France, and of course everything was all haywire and full of excitement and happiness about being home again, at least for a few days LOL

Kyle was as overactive as you can possibly imagine, and so hyped cos he was back home it was almost like having the old old Kyle back.

After a few days, all the excitement calmed down, and unbelievable as it was, Kyle calmed down too! I'd been a bit worried that my mother wouldn't give him his tablets regularly as she doesn't quite agree with it, but she had been and they seemed to now be working wonders.

Kyle was happy again, he was calm (as calm as any other 9 and a half year old boy, anyway LOL), and he was showing more of an interest in everything again.

His concentration levels soared to new heights, he could sit with his learning cd's on his PC for a good 20-30 minutes now, and was really starting to enjoy himself.

The most amazing change in him was that he suddenly started holding a pen and attempting to write a couple of words every now and again!

You might not think that's a great feat, but when you have a son who is almost 10 and can't write (or won't), or even hold ANY kind of writing utensil, you'll understand the greatness of it.

Kyle has never even coloured pictures in colouring books, that's how bad it was. Ok, he still doesn't, and it's very rare he'll try to write anything, but it happens every now and again. Of course, I jump on the chance EVERY chance I get and help him out as much as I can.

It's strange though. He's a fantastic little reader, and he'll type small stuff up on his PC if I help him with the spelling, but he has never ever liked holding anything that even resembles a pen or pencil.

I've tried just about every type you can imagine, but it's always been a no-go area.

I recently read about a new type of pen, one that's supposed to let people see what they're writing while they're writing, that I want to try. Seems some guy came up with the idea because his little girls had some problems and he wanted to help them.

Now if only I could remember the name of the pen...

Anna

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The Year Is Almost Over

2006-12-29T08:03:00.000+00:00

It's been a rough time, so not been back to post much. Had an unfortunate miscarriage and everything just felt rotten for a while, so I got busy with my internet stuff and got the new site TrafficGamers.com and even added a wordpress blog to it.

Keeping myself busy like this has helped me to not dwell too much on the 'happening'.

A good thing did come of it though. I added all of the games to Kyles computer and him and the others are having a blast playing them all. Imagine being a 10 year old (his birthday is on New Years Day) and having over 3000 games to play on your own pc with NO internet connection. He's in heaven LOL.

Ok, so he may not be in heaven right now, in fact, he's in France again with the others visiting his Gran for the Xmas and New Year. What a mistake that was on my behalf, I really shouldn't have let them go, life and xmas has been SO dull without them!

They won't be back until the 4th January, so still a while to go yet AND I'll be missing Kyles birthday for the first time in 10 years. He's not worried though, like he said on the phone; 'That's ok mum, it just means I get to have 2 birthday parties and double the presents!'

He really is a star :D

Anna

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My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part Nine

2006-11-22T23:53:00.000+00:00

So we had the pescription and off we trotted to the local chemist to collect the tablets. We were both quite excited, as the doc had told us how it worked and we wanted to see if he was right.

He had said there were 2 layers in a Concerta tablet, one was a quick release ritalin coating that would get to work almost immediately, and the other was a slow release inner that would work throughout the day.

That meant 1 tablet per day, at least that's what he wanted us to start on, and said we could up it to 2 if it didn't seem to be working too well.

We got the tablets and Kyle couldn't wait to try it out. It was still early morning, so he got the tablet and....

Nope, it wasn't a miracle cure. He calmed down quite quickly, but not lots. Through the day he seemed a tiny tiny tiny bit calmer than he was without tablets, but it was barely noticeable.

We stuck with it, one tablet per day at 8am for the next couple of weeks. It still didn't seem to be kicking in much, so we decided that when he came back from his nans in France (he was going for 3 weeks), we'd up the dosage to 2 tablets per day instead.

All of the kids went to their nans, and although it was bliss to start with, I started getting bored after the first week and couldn't wait for them to come home. I was also really worried about how Kyle would cope with being away from home for so long when he'd just started on the concerta...

ADHD attention deficit hyperactivity disorder ADD ADH ADHD tips ADHD links adhd parenting adhd advice adhd tips adhd kids adhd resources coping with adhd

My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part Eight

2006-11-10T11:43:00.000+00:00

Time to get back to the story of Kyle, my little Star ;)

As I wrote before, when Kyle stopped taking Ritalin, he crashed right back to the way he was before ever starting medication, yet this time it felt worse. I know it only felt worse because we'd now seen a different, calmer, friendlier and happier side to my little boy.

We trundled on, and asked all kinds of people for tips and ideas, nothing much helped. We've always done a lot of activities to help keep him and the other kids occupied, heck, I even wrote a small book of the common activities we have here at home, so that wasn't what we needed help with. We just needed something that would take away his unhappiness, if even only a little.

A friend of mine in America mentioned Concerta. He said it had been fantastic for his daughter who had been almost exactly the same as Kyle and he recommended that we try it out. So we did a lot of researching on the net, and finally decided to ask our doctor about it. He was quite taken aback at first when he realized everything we knew about Concerta and he told us it wasn't 'really' available here in the UK due to how much it costs. Seemingly it's 7x more expensive than Ritalin.

Kyle said 'I don't care how much it costs you, you have to let me try it, because it might work and it might not'. LOL, did I ever mention how grown up he is in many ways?

The specialist agreed to letting us try the Concerta and sent us on our way with a prescription and a new appointment. Would the Concerta help any? There was only one way to find out...

Anna
p.s. If you'd like to check out the book I mentioned Click Here

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ADHD and After School Activities

2006-11-02T21:33:00.000+00:00

ADHD and after school activities

ADHD refers to attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder. Most children whosuffer from this disorder suffer from attention problems as well as hyperactivity. Parents of such children are well aware that inattention and hyperactivity continue throughout the day. Keeping such children busy after school hours can be as difficult as keeping them safe during the school day.

The first step while choosing the right after school activity for your child is to understand how ADHD affects him. Is your child interested in sports? Is he put off by the fierce competitiveness, or does he find it hard to get along with teammates? Does your child vocalize his feelings, or is communication a problem?

For a child suffering from ADHD, physical exercise is always beneficial. Exercise takes up the extra energy and helps to stimulate the brain. Team activities teach social skills and discipline. But, if your child shies away from team sports, you may want to look at activities like dancing, cycling, swimming or gymnastics. Martial arts not only teach techniques of self-defense but also teach self-control and patience.

If your child shows aversion to sport and shows inclination towards the fine arts, you may need to look at some other options. Acting classes are a wonderful form of creative exercise. It also provides the child with ample opportunity to develop his social skills. Music, art or dance can help the child to keep himself busy and entertained.

In case the child is not interested in any of the above, you may want him to join a Boy Scouts club or other community oriented clubs that take up social work. Cleaning a park, putting on a show, helping out in an old age home are various activities that may pique your child's interest.

Whatever form of activity you choose, make sure that you monitor your child's progress periodically. If you feel that there is no progress, you may need to change the activity. Anything that increases your child's self-esteem is good. You may enlist the help of the coach or teacher to assess your child's development.

There are certain activities that are detrimental to a child suffering from ADHD. Computer and video games are a definite NO. Since these games need no interaction, children will feel all the more isolated. These children also find it difficult to distinguish between the good and the bad messages. They may therefore show an inclination to stick to messages that are not needed. Games that need the child to sit and wait for his turn patiently tax his patience and will not be a success.

Although you would want these children to be as near to normal as possible, understanding their needs and limits will help you select the right after school activity - one that is fulfilling, tiring as well as challenging.

ADHD attention deficit hyperactivity disorder ADD ADH ADHD tips ADHD links adhd parenting adhd advice adhd tips adhd kids adhd resources coping with adhd

5 Ways to Deal With ADHD

2006-10-14T13:30:00.000+01:00

With an increasing number of our youths suffering ADHD, stress syndromes, unemployment, depression, drug use, crime and higher rates of youth suicide than ever before, today’s parents and teachers are finding their roles more and more difficult.

According to renowned family relationships specialist, Marguerite Clancy, there are no overnight solutions for issues such as ADHD, but there are a few quick things struggling parents can do now to start dealing with it:

1) Get into a routine and stick to it (try to include fun times and laughter)

2) Set up a punching bag or get your child playing a sport

3) Be consistent with discipline and offer rewards where appropriate

4) Use positive language, keep directions short, maintain calm

5) Agree on consequences for behaviour together

“There are many options available to parents and carers. It is important to show love and respect, and to lead by example”, says Marguerite. “There are also many forms of therapy available to help that don’t rely on medication.” For example, she recommends Sandplay Therapy, which is a well established technique for enhancing emotional growth through play. She suggests parents encourage their child to use toys to represent things that are bothering them.

Dolls, action figurines, cars, balls, and even blocks can all be used to represent people, objects, and everyday situations that may be very hard for the child to put into words. “You’d be surprised what problems your child is experiencing – many of them would be things you’d never have even dreamt of”, says Marguerite. “By recognising the significance of imaginary play, you give your child a way to express themselves using a language they’re fluent in.”

According to Marguerite, parents can then talk about these problems with their child. Then if they’re still experiencing problems, they may want to try a punching bag or a sport. “With an easier way to communicate and an outlet for your child’s frustrations, you should find it far easier to figure out how to improve your situation.”

Glenn Murray heads advertising copywriting studio Divine Write. He can be contacted on Sydney +612 4334 6222 or at glenn@divinewrite.com. Visit http://www.divinewrite.com for further details or more FREE articles.

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My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part Seven

2006-09-24T11:17:00.000+01:00

After being on Ritalin for a few months, we were really happy with the effects it was was having on us as a family. Life was no longer filled with rage and frustration, but slowly it started getting back to that stage.

Kyle was taking Ritalin 2x a day, and although it worked great at first, we started noticing that the effects weren't really lasting for the full 4 hours between doses.

After about 5 months Kyle turned to me and said 'Mum, I think I should stop taking these tablets because they're good but they're not lasting long enough. If they're not lasting long enough, there's really no point in them, right?'

What can I say, he's a grown up kid in many ways ;) Anyway, I've always said that medication would be his choice and his alone, so we stopped using Ritalin. I was a bit worried about it, and it turned out I was right to be worried.

Kyle crashed right back to where he'd been before ever starting the Ritalin, but he was even worse!

Anna

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Coping with ADHD: Patience is a virtue...

2006-09-20T11:35:00.000+01:00

Patience and concentration are 2 things that Kyle has huge problems with due to his ADHD. It hard to find things that can hold on to his interest for longer than 5 minutes, but here's one thing he loves doing:

Mini Worm Farm:

Get a large clear plastic container, some soil, leaves, a little sand, and some bits of vegetables to create the farm. Dig up some earthworms. Fill the container with loose layers of soil and sand, beginning with soil and alternating the layers. Make the soil layers about 4x the size of the sand layers. Also make sure the top layer is soil. 4 or 5 layers should be enough. Drop some small bits of vegetables and leaves on top, and then put the worms in.

Add a lid of some sort, making sure it has air holes. Put the newly created worm farm in a cool dark place for a few days. The worms will tunnel down through the layers, and the kids can see just how good they are at churning up the soil. Please remember to let the worms go when the kids have finished with them.

Anna

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Be Good To You, You Deserve It!

2006-09-14T16:50:00.000+01:00

It's never easy dealing with ADHD, and it's not always possible to get some time to yourself. I know I had a helluva time before the older kids were old enough to cope with Kyle for an hour without me.

The times I yearned for just an hour to myself, for a bath, or to read or just to totally vegetate!

My mother lived far away from me, I had no other relatives or even close friends and I was a single parent. Times got really hard and totally frustrating. I even ended up with major depression problems myself but had to keep going, for the kids' sake.

Life became so much easier for me when we finally got closer to my mother and I could send Kyle to her place for a whole weekend every month. And then when the eldest started being able to handle him (sometimes) it got even easier.

I've been really lucky in finding myself a fantastic man (my fiance Hugh) who takes care of all the kids as if they were his own and now I get lots of time to myself compared to before. God knows I need it due to all the belly troubles I've been having.

Kyle being on Concerta now has made it even easier for people to be able to cope with his ADHD, although it's still not controlled enough to let him stay with my friends or anywhere apart from here at home or with his Gran where he feels most comfortable.

Of course, with his Gran now living in France, the visits will be few and far between.

The point in all this ramblng is: Do everything you can to get some time out for yourself as a parent dealing with ADHD. You need it. Recharge your batteries as often as you get the chance, even if it means sitting on the loo for an hour in total peace when the kids are sleeping. (Yes, I've done that too LOL).

Taking time out will help you to focus and concentrate and will ease a lot of frustrations. Be Good To You, You Deserve It!

Anna

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My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part Six

2006-09-09T17:41:00.000+01:00

The doctor was really good. He told me all of our options, and in the end we settled on trying Kyle with Ritalin. Boy was I scared.

I'd heard so many bad things about it, and I knew I'd get a lot of flack from people for even thinking about trying it. But Kyle was so unhappy in himself that I was wiling to try almost anything to make his life better.

We started on the Ritalin about a week later, and whilst the changes weren't dramatic, there were definitely changes for the better.

Kyle was that little bit happier in himself. He also started concentrating for around 12 minutes at a time, whereas he was only able to concentrate for 4 minutes at the most before.

His memory was still bad, he still had no knowledge of consequences, and he was still the most active kid I've ever known. Rewards still didn't work, and neither did discipline, so we just didn't do it. We still had tantrums and everything still got broke.

None of that was important. What was important was Kyle's happiness. And he really was happier than before.

Anna

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Help Dr Mani save kids lives

2006-09-07T16:51:00.000+01:00

You will probably have noticed the Spread CHD Awareness over on the right at some point in time. I hope you've at least clicked through to read what it's all about. If it hadn't been for an experiment Dr. Mani was running I wouldn't have started this blog ;)

Anyway, I had a mail today from another intrnet marketing colleague about Dr. Mani and his Blog-A-Thon. I couldn't have written it better, sp oasting it here instead.

"My friend Dr.Mani is a heart surgeon who innovatively uses
online marketing to help kids born with heart defects.

On Saturday Sep.9th, in a very special event called the Heart
Kids Blogathon, he is blogging non-stop for 24 hours to raise
funds for the 'heart kids'.

The fundraiser is off with a bang, with over $3,700 donated
already. Every $2,500 raised means an additional operation
can be funded - so please try and help, in any way you can.

http://www.HeartKidsBlogathon.info

Also, don't forget to drop by and encourage him on the big
day! Make sure you visit his blog on September 9th -
the URL is

http://www.EzineMarketingCenter.com/blog/

Thanks So Much!

Eric Louviere"

I really hope you get the chance to help Dr Mani out with this.
Thanks

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My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part Five

2006-09-07T11:18:00.000+01:00

In the meantime I'd been reading these posts by parents and I started reading up on defiance disorder, ADD, ADHD, compulsive disorders. All sorts of things.
I took ideas from each and every one and implemented them with Kyle. It was all I could do because I still didn't know EXACTLY what he was suffering with.

Some things worked, some didn't. Some made things seem better, and yet others just made things worse.

I finally received a letter saying he could be seen by a child psychiatrist! I was scared, but I was so happy! I would at least KNOW what it was and what I could do about it to help make Kyle's life easier for him.

We hadn't been in the doctor’s office for more than 10 minutes when he said 'I'm sorry, there is no doubt in my mind that Kyle has overly moderate ADHD'.

I broke down and cried.

I had always had my suspicions, but to have them confirmed was like a kick in the gut.

Anna

My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part Four

2006-09-05T15:50:00.000+01:00

At the age of 7, Kyle's headmistress at school called me and demanded that I collect Kyle immediately, as he had bitten another child. No questions or explanations. Just 'Come and get your child because we refuse to have naughty behaviour like that in our school'.

I went and got him, and told her he wouldn't be back. I decided to home educate him. It was one of the hardest decisions I've ever made. What if I couldn't do it? What if I wasn't good enough? What if it made him worse? What if he hated me for it?

I was amazingly surprised. Kyle LOVED being at home. He revelled in the one-on-one attention he got. He had always refused to write, and still refused. But his reading came on in leaps and bounds. When he turned 8 he was reading the same stuff as Kelsey, and she was 11! He was as good as Chris on computers, and Chris was 14!

When I took him out of school I started researching everything I could about home education, and came across a whole mound of information posted various places on the internet by people who seemed to have children extremely similar to Kyle.

All along I kept pushing to get a referral for him to be seen by a specialist. All I wanted was to know what I was 'working with'. Was it something simple? Was it something hard to deal with? Would he need medication? Was it really all down to me? Was I to blame somehow?

Anna

My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part Three

2006-09-04T12:57:00.000+01:00

At the age of 4, Kyle started mainstream school. The teachers were as patient as they could be with him, and made sure that whenever they went on trips one of them ALWAYS held his hand. They learnt that from an episode when they lost him. He'd just done his normal thing and wandered off.

Kyle could never sit still in school, and he just couldn't concentrate on anything for more than a couple of minutes at a time. When he was almost 5, we moved to a different town and he changed schools. I took him to the doctors and they told me he was definitely hyperactive.

I took all sweets, e-colours and additives out of his diet and he calmed down a bit. But that was when I noticed that there was something else not quite as it should be. He was calmer, but he had no attention span to speak of, and his concentration levels were almost nil.

The teachers had a helluva time with him, and he had a rotten time with them. I kept telling them that there was something not quite 'connecting' with Kyle, but they wouldn't listen. It was always put down to 'normal' hyperactivity.

Kyle had always been fascinated with flames and fire, and we always had to hide any lighters we had. When he was almost 6 he managed to find one, and at 11pm one night, I could smell smoke. I ran up the stairs to find that he'd burnt a hole in his mattress, his chair, his duvet AND his pillow. That was when I finally broke down. I held him close and wept my heart out.

Kyle cuddled me back, but seemed so totally adjacent. As if he wasn't really feeling that I was upset. He watched TV as he cuddled me, while I was sobbing and hulking.

I knew then that something was definitely wrong. I'd noticed his lack of 'feelings' before, but not as clearly as this. I asked him why he'd done it, why he did things like this all of the time. His reply was; 'The words aren't typing right in my head.'!!

I took him to the doctors the next day and begged for a referral to see a specialist. The doctor turned around and told me it was a discipline issue! I explained, as nicely as I could, that I had 3 other children and Kyle was 'different'. At the age of 6, a lot of the things he did were still 2-year-old things, yet other things were 10-year-old things.

The doctor blew me off totally. I felt as if I was a criminal for even suggesting that there was something not quite connecting in Kyle's head. Even when I aired my suspicions with my mother, I got the same reaction. It was all in my head and it was all my fault. There was nothing wrong with Kyle that a little (or a lot of) discipline wouldn’t sort out.

Believe me, we had tried everything. Rewards, discipline, positive attitudes, ignoring the bad things. None of it worked. And life carried on just as difficult as it always had been. The older kids stopped bringing their friends to the house as Kyle would often get physically violent with them. The house was a total wreck. All our furniture was trashed. We had holes punched in walls, doors slammed and screams echoing throughout the day and night.

Anna

My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part Two

2006-09-03T13:27:00.000+01:00

Kyle was a great “escape artist” and could get out of anything. Windows, locked doors, you name it. We’d turn our heads away for 5 minutes and he was gone. Pretty scary when an 8 month old is walking in the middle of a road, believe me.

He was an early walker and talker. Was constantly babbling on and running around. The only thing was, he STILL wanted to do things he wasn’t physically ready for, and that was the hardest part for us all to deal with. He’d continue getting frustrated, but now he’d bite and throw more stuff around.

Poor Chris and Kelsey were always getting bruised by him. But they handled it well, and loved Kyle to pieces.

Kyle was constantly active, seemed like he just COULDN’T sit still, no matter what.

We moved to Wales when Kyle was 2 and a half. I enrolled him in nursery, thinking that it might help wear him out. I was wrong. It just got him more frustrated, he didn’t get on very well with the other kids and after 4 months I took him out again.

We started to settle down in Wales, and got used to not being able to have anything nice in the house. Any nice furniture we had got wrecked within a couple of months, carpets that were in the house when we moved in had to be taken up due to him still making cakes.

When Kyle was 3 and a half, I had Courtney. Kyle was always very protective of Courtney, and she idolised him right from the start. Unfortunately this meant that she’d copy everything he did. People used to say “How can you cope with such naughty children?” and “Why do you let your kids run riot like that?”

Trying to explain to them was mostly like talking to a brick wall. Kyle was hyperactive, I knew that much, and Courtney liked to copy, and that was all there was to it. Or so I thought...

Anna

My Star Kyle. (Life with ADHD) Part One

2006-09-02T16:08:00.000+01:00

The pregnancy with Kyle was just like any other, with morning sickness and iron deficiency. The bump grew and the sickness subsided. It felt good. He was born on New Years Day. It was an amazingly fast birth. From the very first twinge until it was all over and done with only took 1 hour and 20 minutes.

10 centimetres dilation in less than an hour is hard work, made worse by the fact that when Kyle finally decide to show his face, that’s exactly what he DID do. He came face first, and got stuck! There he was, looking at the world for 20 minutes, while a huge nurse came and lay herself across me to try to push him out.

He was so stuck that they couldn’t put forceps on him, and being that it was his face, they couldn’t use the suction cap neither!

Finally, his whole head emerged, then his left arm. He immediately put his thumb in his mouth, the way he’s always had it every time we saw him on the scan. He was such a welcome addition to the family, and what a beauty he was!

Kyle was a handful right from the start. He was mostly a happy baby, but at times he would seem to get so frustrated at just about anything. It was like HE wanted to do things, but his body wasn’t ready for it.

He would lie on the floor, and you could SEE he wanted to move and get on with life, but at 6 weeks what baby can do that? So he’d slam his head on the floor and scream.

Then, when he first started moving around the floor, he would roll as most babies do. Only thing is, he wanted to crawl! Of course, his body wasn’t physically ready for that, and in frustration he would roll over to the table and smack his head on the table leg. It got so bad at one stage that he had to wear a bicycle helmet.

At 6 months, Kyle would sit in his little bouncy chair and play happily for about 5 minutes. Then he would take whatever he was playing with and aim for Chris or Kelsey, his elder siblings. Even when they ran he’d manage to aim so well that they’d end up with a bump on their head.

When Kyle was old enough to crawl, and then walk we ALWAYS had to watch him, 24 hours a day. He would get into the most unbelievable situations and he absolutely LOVED making a mess with anything he could find.

I lost count of how many times there were “cakes” on the carpet, consisting of flour, eggs, ketchup, hair-gel, milk toilet paper. Actually just about anything he could get his hands on went into making his cakes.

In the end we stopped having carpets, it wasn’t worth the hassle.

Stay tuned for part 2..

Anna

A turning point?

2006-08-31T12:45:00.000+01:00

Today is amazing! In fact, it's been an amazing time since the kids came home from France. The Concerta seem to be REALLY helping Kyle, in all aspects, but today has just got to be the most amazing day we've had so far!

Kyle is running around the house with a tape measure, a notepad and A PEN!!

He's measuring EVERYTHING and actually WRITING his finds and measurements into the notepad!

What can I say? Kyle NEVER writes. Hell, he never even holds a pen! Yet he's doing this totally of his own accord. I tell ya, either the Concerta is working miracles or the aliens have taken away 'my' Kyle and replaced him with some strange kid LOL

Anyway, that's all I wanted to say for now. And to everybody out there: Don't EVER give up on your kids, no matter how difficult it may seem there IS always hope :)

Anna

Who IS this kid??

2006-08-19T10:43:00.000+01:00

Wow, what can I say? They came back on Tuesday and there STILL hasn't been any major tantrums! Kyle only missed his Concerta tablets twice throughout the whole 3 weeks he was gone, and believe me, that's an achievement in itself for my mother LOL.

But seriously, I've been waiting for the bomb to go off and for the screams and fights and all the throwing things around but.... It hasn't happened yet!

Is it the Concerta? Is it just the calm before the storm? I have no idea, but in all Kyle's 9 and a half years we've NEVER gone 2 consecutive days without at least 1 major blow-up.

Heck, the kid is even wearing clothes without a great big fight about it. He wears pyjamas for bed (which he never usually does), then when he gets up in the morning he puts his trousers on. Ok, so it's only trousers and nothing else, but man, that is SO different to having him running around 'au naturell' LOL.

IF this is all down to the Concerta then OMG I wish we'd known about it sooner.

Anna

Counting the days...

2006-08-12T19:47:00.000+01:00

Time has gone so slowly for me without the kids here. It's been good though, I've had time to spend on myself and Hugh, and also time to write another ebook. I haven't been feeling too good lately, so the break is really what I needed. but Oh My God! It's SO quiet and boring without them! Thank god 3 of them come home on Tuesday. LOL, I can picture it now, they'll all be SO happy to be home, they'll give me hugs and kisses, they'll chatter non-stop about the holiday, they'll have food, they'll settle down to watch tv and then BAM! They'll start to quibble and wind each other up. Hahahaha, kids are just great, eh?

Actually, I was sitting re-reading the article about Schools and Education that I posted here previously. The author is right. School IS too old fashioned and stuck in it's ways. At least it is here in the UK, I think possibly even more so than over in the USA. School here still goes by a lot of the old Victorian rules and principles (apart from now they're not allowed to hit the kids).

Although it's hard work for me to home educate Kyle, and it means putting my own things on the shelf (as discussed in comments with 'angel'), it's what I CHOOSE to do. Heck, these kids are going to be looking after us in our old age, don't they deserve the best we can do for them now?

Oh, by the way, I've also started a new blog. One where I'll be writing more about parenting rather than about living with ADHD. Nothing much there yet, just one or 2 posts, but feel free to check it out: http://real-life-parenting.blogspot.com/ and if YOU have a blog related to parenting, drop me a line and I'll add your link to mine ;)

Anna

'School' by Dr Wysong

2006-07-29T21:14:00.000+01:00

Ok, it's getting a tad boring here now, almost too quiet without the kids. They've only been gone for 5 days and I'm missing them terribly, can you imagine what I'll be like in another weeks time?? hahaha

So anyway, what with home educating Kyle and stuff I tend to look for a lot of articles regarding that area. Found this one today, I hope you enjoy it

Anna

'School' by Dr Wysong

Traditional school coursework does not usually make smarter or better people. Everyone needs the basic three R skills, but to a young person detail beyond that is pretty much a waste of student’s and teacher’s time as well as tax dollars. School serves as a convenient babysitter and helps to socialize children, but history, economics, physics and algebra minutia doesn’t do much more than superficially acquaint kids with some terms.

Learning that is important to living comes primarily from what is experienced. For example, love and concern from a teacher, fear of a bully and infatuation for a classmate all create indelible lessons remembered for a lifetime. On the other hand, the only lesson most kids take away after learning the Pythagorean Theorem and the date of the battle of Gettysburg is that learning isn’t fun and is a waste of time.

The sooner a person can get out of school, the better the chances for useful learning. Personal initiative, individual study, successes, mistakes, fear and pride out in the real world are the best teachers. These two volumes encapsulate the issues we face in real life and have taken me ______chapters and almost a thousand pages to cover in abbreviated form. The fact that essentially none of this material is covered in formal schooling is a testament to the failure of modern education.

Without sufficient life experience (which creates little hooks in the mind to which details can attach), or a specific need to apply information, learning just by rote goes into short-term memory (long enough to pass a test) and is then essentially lost. As mental calisthenics coursework is fine. As training for life it is woefully inadequate. Children are taught how to read (barely) but they are left unable to distinguish what is worth reading. It teaches about things, not reasons. It gives the false idea that life is scripted such that if specific do’s and don’ts are followed--papers are written and tests aced--that success will surely follow.

If in doubt about the utility of modern education ask employers whether new graduates (other than from trade schools) bring to the workplace anything other than tools they don’t know how to use. If an employer can find an employee who is motivated, eager to learn and a self-starter (all rarities), that is about the most that can be hoped for. From there the employer is faced with all the costs of training…and pay to the employee while doing it. In the meantime schools take a big chunk out of tax dollars and teachers get good salaries and great benefits. But the students they turn out are in no way ready to hit the ground running once they find a job. Nevertheless, educators – with their absurd lecture, note-take, regurgitate pedantic – mislead students into believing that they are receiving real training that can immediately command high wages and benefits. This not only does a disservice to the student but forces employers to repair the damage and bring new graduates back down to earth.

Understandably students spending years burdened by mountains of memorization are exhausted by academic demands and feel entitled to a reward, even though they intuitively know that the majority of what they have memorized is worthless. The result is a workplace filled with overpaid, under-skilled employees. Many see their stint with education as a price paid, a reason for entitlement and a burdensome part of their personal history, not an active and engaging part of their future.

Schools should effectively and thoroughly teach the basics that everyone needs to function well in society. Very general courses should be taught in all the disciplines to give students a broad overview of what knowledge holds and to equip them for a degree of self-sufficiency – like balancing a checkbook, avoiding credit card debt and high interest, writing a clear letter, preparing meals, fixing a plugged sink, sewing, checking the car oil and air tire pressure, changing the furnace filter and so on.

This could be accomplished easily within 6-8 years of school, but beginning at an older age since too much of education is wasted on the young. School days should be shortened and not begin in the early morning when growing bodies and minds should be sleeping. By compressing school-time, teachers would be forced to hit the high points that students are more likely to retain.

Specific training for specific careers should follow these 6-8 years with lots of hands-on practical experience and emphasis on problem solving. Before a student is released into the workforce they should be able to accomplish a job with competence. As things presently are, most degrees do not signify useful skills other than book reading and test taking.

Also, interspersed in the school curriculum should be coursework in intellectually challenging topics such as philosophy, science, religion, marriage, family, metaphysics, politics, sociology, ethics, logic and all the other fields of controversy in which everyone should make a lifelong study and contribution. Such topics should be taught using basic concepts and by encouraging synthesis, original thinking and hands-on learning, not with a dull memorization format.

Most of all, students should learn that mental growth is an ongoing endeavor and a basic human requirement for happiness. Continuous intellectual growth is necessary to make oneself interesting to others, to properly function in society, and to contribute to improving the world. Education does not end with a degree, it is a lifelong process.
Unfortunately, rather than school stimulating a desire for learning it can leave a bitter after taste that discourages intellectual growth.

Teachers should be accomplished in the real-world field they are teaching and be accountable at all times. Tenure is a crazy idea as is most socialism. If there is any occupation that should be under pressure to achieve performance standards at all times, it is teaching. Instead, unlike any other career, mere time can lock in a bad teacher for a lifetime. The best formula for souring young minds on education is to force incompetent and unlikable teachers on them. Education is not about teachers and their security, it’s about properly training young minds and motivating the intellect of the next generation.

These are all nice ideas, but education is not going to change anytime soon. It is too institutionalized, governmentized, unionized and tenurized. It likes itself the way it is, very comfortable and secure for all who feed from it. Never mind whether students, the workplace and society are really benefiting from it or not.

It’s not like there is some grand conspiracy to keep education boring, irrelevant and expensive. It’s just that those who write curricula and who teach know no better and find it easiest to stay in the same groove in which they were taught. Love of children and wanting to teach are certainly important, but not enough. Students who go through high school, then college, then grad school to become teachers are still students. Students teach others how to be students, not what life is really about or how to succeed in it.

It should be a prerequisite that before any politician presumes to run society that they have had at least a decade of proven success in the real world at real jobs. Similarly, a teacher entrusted with the future of the world (children), must have lived out in the real world and proven their ability to be successful at it. Particularly should this be so at the high school and college levels. Instead, too often students or those who were incapable or nonproductive in the workplace find a home in a teaching position. We must change the aphorism: Those who can, do, those who cannot, teach. It should be: Those who can, teach; those who cannot should go do something else. One on-line university that caters to those discouraged by traditional schooling has the right idea. Their advertising for professors says, “If you haven’t done it during the daytime, you can’t teach it at night!”

Speaking of the Internet, that may be the spearhead for a solution to education because it creates a realistic alternative to the traditional classroom format. Education will not change from within because it is too comfortable with itself like all embedded institutions get to be. The free market of Internet choices may create the pressure all institutions really pay attention to—economics. That will force the system to either become relevant and efficient or die a quiet death as their tuition resources dry up.

Parents are not above blame or absolved from educational responsibilities just because kids can be pushed off to school and taxes are paid. We should not surrender our children to an incompetent system. Home schooling or ‘unschooling’ (an actual movement you can search out on the Internet) are options every parent should explore. At the least, children should be engaged when they get home from school. They learn best by experience and example so parents who are themselves thinking people and are able to put what is being taught in school into context and to discuss and live intelligently the matters touched upon in these two volumes are the best teachers children can hope for.

For further reading, or for more information about, Dr Wysong and the Wysong Corporation please visit www.wysong.net or write to wysong@wysong.net. For resources on healthier foods for people including snacks, and breakfast cereals please visit www.cerealwysong.com.

A Sleepless Night

2006-07-25T11:26:00.000+01:00

God, am I tired or what??

I'm a night owl and don't go to bed until around 2-3am normally. Ever since I had Kyle I've never been able to go to bed early, or even stay in bed long for that matter, always had to keep an eye on what he's doing.

Anyway, I knew there was no way I could risk sleeping last night after finally getting ALL the kids (including Chris' best mate) around 11pm. If I had, I just wouldn't have gotten up in time for their taxi picking them up at 5.30am this morning.

So instead, I sat working on my website and my new salespage for an ebook I'm in the middle of writing. Hugh (my fiance) sat and watched TV and chatted about anything and everything just to make sure he stayed awake with me to keep me company. Gotta love him! :~D

We sat up ALL night, and thank goodness we did, cos the taxi turned up 30 minutes early! LOL

Poor kids were still in bed so it was a matter of 'Get up, get dressed, get GONE!' hahahaha.

Oh well, saved a lot of the normal morning tantrums and yelling and everything and after they left we went to sleep for a couple of hours. It was heaven, lemme tell ya!

So that's it then, they've gone to France and are gonna be gone for the next 3 weeks...

What to do with the time, eh?

Anna

Tablets, Tablets Everywhere!

2006-07-24T19:06:00.000+01:00

Man, I swear you'd think we were all a bunch of junkies in this house LOL

I had to go to the docs today to get repeat prescriptions before the kids go on holiday tomorrow.

Bad enough I had to get Prozac for Chris and Concerta for Kyle, but I'd also run out of ALL of my tablets that I'm on for my belly troubles.

It's quite embarrassing to go in to the chemists to pick up 5 different types of tablets at once (yep, I take no less than 3 kinds of tablets for this stupid belly of mine) LOL.

I did get an appointment at hospital for my colonoscopy for next month, only they gave me the appointment in a hospital that I can't get to hahahaha. Had to get that changed to a closer hospital (one that's only 2 hours away instead), but unfortunately that's going to take another 3 months at least.

Gotta love the NHS :D

Aww, can't complain though, at least we get that stuff free, not like our American friends who have to pay for EVERYTHING health related. That must surely suck!

Anyway, got some web-work to do and a bit more packing for the kids and THEN I have to try to get them to bed early (it's already 7.15pm) so they're awake when the taxi comes to pick them up at 5.30am in the morning.

Wish me luck!

Anna