HNT Courtesy of Margaret at They Belong to Us

Welcome to e[lust] - your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in e[lust] #10? Start with the rules, check out the schedule in the site’s sidebar and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Week’s Top Three Posts ~

Start Without Me – It’s for when one of us is too tired, or not in the mood, or out of town, or the other of us is too horny to wait. But now, here, right in front of me, you’re touching yourself, playing yourself, and it is the fucking hottest thing I’ve ever seen.

Wicked Tongues - There are so many different ways that a mouth can connect themselves with my cunt. And so many partners, each with their own way of connecting with me.

“Vanilla” Bigotry – I effectively retired my personal usage of the word “vanilla” when one of these sick fucks told me that he hated that term. He said it was condescending, and the implication that kinky people have any idea what goes on in other people’s bedrooms just because they aren’t fucking around in a dungeon was ridiculous.

~ e[lust] Editress ~

Audible – More hushed giggles, more kissing sounds. A gasp followed immediately by a quiet, restrained moan. I had to make up the images in my head, try to picture what caused that gasp, who’s mouth was on what body part. Or was it even a mouth?

~ Featured Post (Lilly’s Pick) ~

Swing Shift Volume 33- We’re “Sexually Festive!” – What I do know is that I love Veronica now more than ever, that we choose our extra-marital partners with care and respect, and never fail to remember that our primary relationship is the most important one. If we’re considered sluts or promiscuous by others, so what?

See also: Pleasurists #66 and #67 for all your sex toy review needs.

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Sex News, Interviews, Politics & Humor

Babeland Store Dream

Spend an Evening with Madison Young and Help Support the Arts

Partner rape, cryptids, and other crazy myths

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Anal Sex for Beginners

Choosing the right partner in poly relationships

Controlling or Petty?

Dating and Fucking

In response to: Gang Bang Curiosity

Intoxicative Healing

Reflection

Status Uterus Orgasmus

Therapy – Two Years

The Lost Art of the Hand Job

Time and Punishment: Some dynamics of male chastity in marriage

We Don’t Need No Education?

You Make My Tummy Funny

Kink & Fetish

Another Friday Story Time

BDSM — Abuse and Consent

Creating Space in Kink

Discovered

Ferocity

I am in trouble

Method: Episode Two

Nightly Spanking

Orgasm Control

Sex And Sadness

The Hands of a Goddess

The Day…

Wake-up call

What About the Children

Erotic Writing

Art Wednesday

Are You Watching Me? (3rd and Final Part)

An Afternoon Delight

Back To My Old Tricks

Climax At Midnight #6

controlling the beast

Group Post: “The Day….”

Harmony

Local

No Sex: Need Sleep

Pack It Up…Pack It In

Performance

Solo Session with B

Slam

The Good Kind of Wake-up Call

That Kind Of Girl…Who Gets Off In A Crowded Bar

The Hammer

The Threesome

The Golden Goddess

The Stranger

The realest thing

Wicked Wednesday: Date Night

Black Lace Lips by Nina C.

There I stood at the front of the room with a playful feather-tipped whip in my grasp, the short rubber tails resting in the palm of my other.  I smiled down at one of my favorite workshop attendees, gave her wink, and then slowly narrowed my eyes as the rubber tails began to slap against my open hand in a slow rhythm.

“I hear you were naughty, very naughty.  I can’t allow you to be naughty like that without paying the price.  Are you ready to tell me what you did?”

The room is quietly transfixed, watching my quick transformation from bubbly and educational into an example of a confident and assertive partner with the promise of exotic pleasures shining in my eyes.  Not just any pleasures, mind you, but the kind of sexy fun that gives permission to be naughtier than my fictional accusations with no regrets and no risk.  After all, an invitation like that tells a lover that she or he has permission to let down their guard, join my fantasy and make it real.

“Oh, yes!”  came her eager response in a stage whisper, triggering a wave of laughter through our group.

That night I was discussing the value of props during dirty talk, but I had clearly found a topic of interest with my participants that night (and not just my target).   The questions came fast and furious after the workshop:

• How do I get my partner to do something new?
• Where does that confidence come from, and how do I tap in without feeling silly?
• I’ve always wanted to try something special but he won’t initiate.  How can I suggest it without it falling flat?
• We’re both the passive type.  Is there a way to invite my partner to be more assertive with me, without them feeling nervous about mistreating me?
• And my favorite: Can you teach me how to stand up and look smooth saying something like that?

How to start?  Begin by looking for your voice by hunting through quality erotic stories of sensual dominance.  You need not be the dirtiest sailor in town, nor do you need to be the dominant partner in your relationship.  That’s right, you can initiate just far enough to give your partner the inspiration and direction to take charge for the rest of your interlude.  Regardless of whether you’re a smoldering dominatrix or a shy librarian on a mission, once you’ve found a natural persona you can work with you’ll be ready to tap into the other elements of your fantasy including your plot, props, pleasure points, poise and sensual words.

Ready to learn more?  You’re in luck!

Join me for a live workshop this weekend at the lovely Lotus Blooms in Alexandria, details below.  Not in the DC area this weekend?  You can also check out my series of workshops on Fantasies for the Shy at the wonderful KinkAcademy .

When you’re ready to take Irresistible Seduction to new heights, drop me a line to schedule your one-on-one session with me.  My clients come from all over the world, thanks to the magic of Skype, as well as from the DC area!

Irresistible Seduction: From Fantasy to Bedroom

• Sat, March 13, 8:00pm – 9:30pm
• Lotus Blooms at 1017 King Street, Alexandria, VA. (703) 535-8225 (map)
• You requested this topic at our January workshop, Fantasies for the Shy, and here it is! Ready to heat things up this March? Enter a new level of seduction as you entice your lover with an irresistible touch of sensual dominance, even if you’ve never dared to before. Bring voice, poise, and titillation into alignment as Dr. Ruthie guides you in exactly how to bring this fantasy from your imagination to your bedroom. Arrive early to shop with Dr.Ruthie at 7pm, then join us for the workshop at 8pm sharp. This event is open to all genders, sexualities, relationships and singles. Reservations are suggested to ensure your seat, cost is $20. Call (703) 535-8225 for info and tickets.

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Slaves for their own pleasure?

I’ve been musing about something I heard on FetLife.

Some people think that slaves and submissives are just meant to be used for someone else’s pleasure. In this scenario, a slave would never say, “Please do it softer there,” or “Would you go down on me?” The slave would basically just let his or her body be used for the pleasure of the Master (or Mistress…. whatever) unless specifically pushed past boundaries, and would then use a safeword to get out of something that was just too much.

Regular, vanilla sex is about mutual pleasure.

So is BDSM, but in a different way. The mutual pleasure is emotional or relational, but not necessarily physical. I know some Masters and slaves have an entire BDSM dynamic where sexual pleasure is not even part of their relationship. Maybe the slave is a maid, or a servant, or a confidante, but they don’t have orgasms. Other people might use sex as part of their BDSM lifestyles, but it is only about what the Master wants. For example, maybe the Master has to be brought to orgasm before the sub gets pleasured, like earning your orgasm. Or maybe only the Master gets pleasured. Or maybe they have sex, but the slave doesn’t get a say-so on how or when or how hard or how long or anything–the slave is just a tool for the Master.

And for some people, that really gets them off. The idea of being used, totally and completely, may not be physically pleasurable, but it sure can be a real kind of mental and emotional pleasure.

Some people in our society think sex should always be equally pleasurable, mutually satisfying, with no one partner being used, abused, beaten, or coerced. I’m totally for that kind of sex, too! But when we start telling people the “right” way to have sex, that means there is a “wrong” way, too. And is there really a wrong way to have sex, if both people enjoy it (at least on some level)?

I’m not advocating rape here. That is a wrong way to have sex, when one person is forced or truly coerced.

But in a relationship with two consenting adults, when one person says, “I want to give the power up to you, I want you to use me as you see fit, treat me like dirt and use me as a play-thing, and think only of your own pleasure” and the other person thinks that sounds like a great idea…. is that “wrong” sex? Maybe it’s not something a lot of uber-feminists would be okay with, but I’m not sure why not. If a woman is free and equal to a man, and freely chooses to give that up so she can be dominated, treated like trash, and bossed around, who are the feminists to tell her that her free choice was the “wrong” one? If that’s what gets her off, mentally or emotionally or physically…. isn’t that “right” sex for her?

I’m not in a Master/slave relationship, so for those of you that are….. is sex a big part of your dynamic? Do you both get equal pleasure? How does this work?

I’ve had a couple of really intense sexual dreams lately, dreams where I was fucking you, hard and smooth. There was no way to tell if my cock was bio or strap on, just that it was real, belonged to me, was owned and used by me. Flesh and silicone, leather and blood it felt the same because it was the same. I could feel it pulsing, stiff and avidly filling you. I knew it was good and simply right to have my cock buried inside you. Every nerve ending in my entire body was shouting its joy, howling it loud and fucking clear. And I knew that you felt it too.

On top of you, I had you pinned by my weight and excessive desires. You were immobile apart from the compulsory movements caused by my continued and necessary thrusting. But your eyes were alive and dynamic, telling me and yelling out for more. With diminished vocabulary and a vocal range drastically reduced to a few grunts and guttural moans you declared how much I was fulfilling your needs.

Your body betrayed you, gave you away and to me at every stroke. I can play its games and win, read its wants and wet, wet, needs with ease. It thrills me to see you like that, given up, given in, surrendering entirely to my care and strict demands. Giving to my cock everything I want to take and more than I can dream.

The stream of profanity running constantly through my head goaded me, incited and drove me on yet most of it didn’t breathe fresh air. It really was pure filth in its finest impure form and what slipped through was tame and limp in comparison. Eventually, as time glides by you’ll hear it all I’m sure and the most disgusting lewdness will be music in your ears.

I know that I still bury it, the need, the longing, that I’m very good at digging great deep holes and throwing parts of myself inside. And for all my written swagger and cocksure words there are times when the real desire is swamped. When the terrified baby boy butch cowers inside and ceases to be able to connect the power and control to meaningful forward motion. When that happens, when I become inarticulate and powerless and submerged under the weight of forty fake years then maybe. Maybe those dreams are simply my way of fighting back.

And for all we’ve done and dreamed and talked about you still have no idea how much and how many ways I want to take you.

Product #: CNVSR-J287

This basic stainless steel and leather collar has a 1″ wide strip of shiny steel mounted on a 1.25″ wide strip of leather. D-ring, plus lockable hasp. (Lock not included.) Small Master Locks sold separately. Extra Small fits 10 1/4- 13 1/2″ neck Small 11 3/4- 15″ neck

After the week in diapers, I sat down wtih E and we went through all of my panties and threw out the ones he couldn’t stand, then divided what was left into two categories: tolerable and desirable. I keep my panties in my top bureau drawer, folded in two little nylon box things I got from Ikea, so we put the tolerable panties on the left side of my panty drawer and the desirable ones on the right, so that now I really have to think about which panties I’m going for in the morning. Do I want to be a tolerable little girl or a desirable little girl? More often than not I only want to be tolerable and here’s why:

If I’m wearing cute panties, I’m going to stay in those panties. E will be pleased with me and won’t bother changing me and, while he may slide his hand up my skirt (I rarely wear pants) every now and then to cop a feel of my cute panties, it rarely leads to anything. However, if I’m only wearing tolerable panties and E checks me–especially if I’ve done something wrong–I get hauled off to the bedroom for some punishment which usually involves some erotic embarrassment, spanking, and diapering. So, really, wearing my gross granny panties is more of a come on than wearing my frilly, lacy little ruffled panties. Sometimes, if E is really pissed that I’ve worn something less than appealing, he’ll even cut the panties off of me (there are scissors by the bed). Last time he hung them around my neck and made me wear them like that for almost an hour! And of course the whole time, he’s telling me that if I continue being a bad girl he’s going to throw away all my panties and it will be nothing but diapers. Sometimes he pushes my face into one and tells me to smell it. (What do they do to the plastic to make it smell so good? Nothing else quite smells like that. I love it!)

Granny panties

After being dressed down for wearing the wrong panties, I usually get a spanking, having to waddle across the room wearing my panties around my knees to fetch a hairbrush if E isn’t wearing his belt. I like doing this because there’s a mirror on the closet, so I not only get to see myself walking across the room like that, but I can see E behind me either checking out my ass, stroking his cock, or just thinking about what he’s going to do to me next. It’s super hot! And the spanking isn’t too bad either. It doesn’t happen every time, but I’ve had orgasms from just being spanked before, especially if its an OTK spanking. I think that the position is just better and it feels more intimate, though I also like being told to put my palms on a mattress and stick my butt out. It’s wonderful

By the time the spanking is over, E is usually unable to keep his head in the game any longer and will just push me off of his lap and just push his cock right in, since by this time, I’m usually soaking wet. And if I’m in the palms-on-the-mattress position, he doesn’t even have to do that. He just grabs my hips. Sometimes he’ll make me crawl across the room again to get a diaper to fuck me on, but that’s rare. I prefer sex on a freshly wet diaper to a dry one anyway.

I usually am only put into a diaper after sex. E likes to know that I’m wearing a diaper filled with his cum. I’m not sure why since, as a guy, he’s not horny after we’ve been together, but I enjoy wearing a cummy diaper on my freshly spanked bottom, so I don’t fight it. But even if he’s feeling lazy or disinterested afterward, it’s almost more the threat of diapers that really excites me.