Klaire and Grace: a twin mom blog

The K Word

2012-02-09T13:09:00.001-06:00

I officially enrolled the girls in KINDERGARTEN today. I was trying to live in my own little world of denial, but the reminder e-mails kept coming, the information packets in the mail, the gentle shoves (sp?) from Grandparents...so I did it. The actual process wasn't a big deal once I located their immunization records, but the realization of what I was doing knocked the wind out of me as I typed. I called my mom three times during the process, because she's an expert both on the system I was using, and in making me come back down to earth. I think I covered my hesitation and excuses for calling pretty darn well. ha.

Don't get me wrong, they are ready for Kindergarten (besides one of their preschool teachers reservations which I will go into later). They are ready, socially, academically and mature enough to handle it. I'm ecstatic about this, we are SO INCREDIBLY lucky to have healthy, happy,amazing little girls. The question is are we ready for them to be so grown up? I sometimes feel like I continue to do far too many things for them, maybe wishing for the underlying effect of keeping them "small." It's not working. They are growing up before our eyes, with every passing day I feel my babies becoming further and further from anything even resembling a baby. This is hard, and it is wonderful at the same time. Lately, I cannot even look at their baby pictures without tearing up. What the heck is this!? Some kind of a mid preschool crisis!? Lordy, maybe I will get this all out of my system and be totally fine on K-day (the first day of Kindergarten a mere 6 months away!)

Back to Kindergarten readiness. I'm going to copy and paste a desperate e-mail I sent to a few of my relatives and educator friends that I trust know me well enough to look past my craziness and answer my cries for help. :)

We had conferences last night for preschool. I was looking forward to them this time because Grace has been doing so much better, with participating and actually talking in class! Turns out she's doing AWESOME, right where she needs to be academically, writing her name, knows all letters, their sounds, numbers to 20. And, talking in class, this is huge as she didn't say a word for probably 2 months.

I was not expecting to be now worried about Klaire. I should know by know that I'll always be worried about one or both at the same time! She seems to have adjusted well, and has fun in class, follows directions, has friends. She sometimes attempts to write her name but mostly does squiggly lines when asked to. She knows her letters, but would only say her numbers up to 10 called 14, 24 and 15, 25, and so on??? Ok so she's not quite up to where she might need to be "academically," no biggie, but the thing that bothered me and I WISH I had said something then but it was a case of thinking about it later and realizing how much it bothered me...she said "Sometimes I really don't think she understands what we are asking of her" hmm. I thought that was a strange comment. Klaire is no dummy, and I do wonder if is a matter of shyness? She also said that Kindergarten might be tough for her. Great. And isn't that what preschool is for, to prepare them for Kindergarten? Don't get me wrong I really like her teacher, she is a totally sweet and caring teacher...and K loves her, but I'm wondering what she meant by that, and if she's not understanding isn't that your job to work with her to help her understand? The one thing she did really get better at was cutting. She showed us something she cut out at the beginning of the year (which was shredded) and her cutting job last week. It was great! We got in the car and I showed it to her to praise her progress, and she said "I didn't do that, Amy did" Oh Good Lord. Who knows.

There responses were supportive, reassuring, helpful, and exactly what I needed to confirm my thoughts. Bless their hearts, they pointed out the many amazing things Klaire can do and has done in the past, and all the ways she IS ready. I am so lucky to have the support system that I do. Thank God for strong amazing women in my life. Can't say that enough.

So there you have it. The girlies are enrolled in Kindergarten, ready or not, here we come! I'm going to post a picture of my Klaire Bear. She has been really into dressing herself and I try to let her have full creative license...especially on the days when they are just going to daycare and for sure on the weekends. She likes to pick out of Grace's drawers for some reason which doesn't make much sense because little does she know all of her clothes are newer since she grows like a WEED! Anyway, here was her ensemble yesterday. Those are the shoes that 6 months ago if on her feet she acted like they were on fire, but now they are cool because they sparkle. Kids! Girls!

Hiatus!

2012-02-06T09:35:00.001-06:00

I have been on a major blog hiatus. I only have half of our Christmas pictures up and in the last two months have only managed to post those and nothing else! Yikes. What will the girls ever do if they don't have every month of their lives documented!!??:)

I better update.

Preschool is going fantastic. I don't know what happened but something just clicked and they LOVE it. No reservations whatsoever getting dropped off, Grace doesn't even say goodbye anymore, and Klaire is down to one quick kiss and hug and she's on her way. It's so nice. Grace is also talking in class now, some days when I pick her up her teacher will say "we chatted ALL day!" I warned her that once the kid started, she might wish for some quiet. Actually they seem really happy that she came around. We have conferences tomorrow, and I'm excited to hear their progress. Klaire plays dress up a lot I think in class, and is not too interested in writing her name like Grace is. Oh well, there's plenty of time in Kindergarten for that. The other day out of no where in the car Grace said "I know the allegiance" I said, oh yah? Say it. And word for word, she did. Amazing. Then I asked them both to say it. Yep-pretty much perfect. I had no idea they knew it!

What else...

Brian bought a new (old) truck. He's been waiting for years to have something other than his little tiny car to drive the hour to work. This one came along and he had to jump on it. Something about the engine that they don't make anymore. I dunno, but it's big and loud and he loves it. He's been doing lots of useless errands. I'm looking forward to easy Craigslist furniture hauling:)

hmmm

I have been trying to eat better. Less sugar and bread, more veggies, and meats/proteins. It's hard!!! I went through a major sugar detox of sorts and it was awful, headaches and sleeplessness. I never realized how much sugar I was eating, or that my body would react that way! Kind scary, but now I'm on the right track and slowly trying to get the rest of the fam on board with me. The girls are much more open to it than 'ol BW since they eat pretty darn well themselves, but he'll come around I think. That said this weekend stuck in the house and making cookies by the dozens did not do well for the diet-but it's Monday again, and I'm back on track. I also joined a gym for the first time in over 5 years, and have actually enjoyed that time alone to take out any extra aggressions and frustrations on the treadmill.

I better end with a hilarious Klaire story. We had Jackson over the other night and while changing him (this was before he was potty trained, YAY, Go Jackson!:) Klaire looked over at Grace and said "Well, look at that! ...I think they call it a peanut." OMG I could not help but laugh. Too hilarious.

We are enjoying our independent, funny, smart little girls. They make me smile, and drive me nuts every day, and I think that's just the way it should be:)

Sledding!

2012-02-05T19:11:00.001-06:00

Christmas 2011 Part 1!

2012-01-11T08:54:00.004-06:00

Pictures are coming soon, although old news now I have to post them to get in my book! They are in my photoshop bin just waiting patiently. SOON!

Failed Santa Attempt 2011

2011-12-22T13:19:00.000-06:00

Grace BEGGED to go see Santa again (they saw him at preschool and daycare) so I figured I'd doll them up and bring them, maybe I'd get a fun picture out of it again. They were both all excited until after I paid the $15 for one 4x6 and then Grace wouldn't stand by him unless I did. I do not want to be in this picture. Klaire was very grown up and stood right by him chatting and even put her hand on his white glove:) We ended up with no picture and a little tantrum of my own. In retrospect I should have just gotten the picture of Klaire! Dumb mommy! Anyway the nice lady did give me a refund. I marched out to the car only to remember I brought my own camera, so we hung around and got a few shots all dressed up. Maybe next year.

Someone is in the Christmas spirit!

2011-12-20T08:45:00.002-06:00

name!

2011-12-19T10:32:00.000-06:00

Since the time change the girls have been getting up at the crack of dawn. Seriously at 5:30 most mornings. Sometimes 6. On the weekends Brian and I do our best to ignore them and tell them to "go play, color, we don't really care what just get out of our room at 5:30 on a Saturday!" Most of the time they will go fend for themselves for about an hour until I get up at a more reasonable time, like 7:) Anyway, they usually end up coloring (and fighting). This weekend Grace brought me a picture that she calls cards to give to whoever she deems worthy at that moment. Check it out! She wrote her name all by herself, no help! Obviously at 4 1/2 this should be a skill already, but so far I've not seen either one of them master it yet! Woo hoo! Klaire-bear is still hung up on that darn K. I knew I might regret that someday:) She gets frustrated and doesn't want to try the rest of the letters, with me anyway who knows at school she might write it all the time. We are going to keep working on it!

Indefinite

2011-12-16T12:37:00.003-06:00

Welp, the patch is really back! Grace did fabulous at her follow up appt today. She did the vision test "like a big kid" and passed! He estimates her sight at 20/30 so no glasses for now. We are to continue the patch 4-6 hours a day, a little less rigid and a missed day here and there is ok. She sees her beloved "Bastian" again in April barring any changes. He said since it went back so fast to wandering last time this will probably be a long term thing. As always, it could be worse. After a few days of "protest" she's back to wearing it with not much trouble and gets a kick out of reminding us when we forget:)

the patch is back

2011-12-05T09:46:00.000-06:00

Grace is back in her patch. We've been noticing and trying to ignore the fact that her right eye is turning out again. I actually notice it doing it alot worse, and for a longer duration than before. Darn it! I put a call into Dr. Troia and made an appt (December 16th) and was all set to wait until then to do anything. To my surprise I got a call from the doctor himself wanting to talk about what's going on! He decided to start the patch before the appt. So long story short, we're back to 6 hours a day. This time around it's not going as smoothly. Although it's only been this weekend, and she always tends to whine with more than anyone else (surprised?). She's asking if it's time to take it off yet about an hour into it, and saying it's itchy! She's also complaining alot more that she "can't see" and that "you are fuzzy" so that does make me wonder if there's been some change in her vision too. We might end up with little pink glasses after all. She was a bit concerned about wearing it to school, but I told her that her teachers and classmates will think she's a pretty pretty pirate:) She was satisfied with that.

In other news, the girls LOVED playing in the snow this time! I didn't even buy updated snow pants because they hated it so much last year. So off in their 2T highwater snowpants they went out into the blizzard:) Klaire stayed out with Brian for close to 2 hours! Crazy! I have lots of pictures to share...so coming soon!

daycare class pictures

2011-11-30T09:03:00.000-06:00

I have to share the pictures they girls got taken at daycare. They are so much better than the school ones, too bad they are about 3 times the price too! I love that they took some together and even love the cheesy poses...because they are just so cheesy they are cute!

Thankfull!

2011-11-29T08:38:00.000-06:00

We had a nice Thanksgiving, and as always a wonderful meal provided by... not me. One of these years I'll probably have to learn to cook a turkey. I'm thankful to Jerri who took these pictures of the kids playing and facebook so I could download them! I didn't even get my camera out, not like me I know!!!?

In other news, I took my mittens to a craft fair and had success! It was a true group effort and we ended up making 70 pairs of mittens! That's an accomplishment! Grace told me the night before to "go get rid of those mittens" they are both sick of me working in the "sweat shop" as we like to call it and ready to have a free time mommy back! I think I'd do it again, but maybe better space out the mitten making time throughout the year better.

Backup Genevieve

2011-11-15T07:22:00.006-06:00

Grace found the extra Genevieve I bought on ebay as a backup for a disaster if we ever lost the original. I had it stuffed way up in the closet and she spotted it this morning. Crap! Now we have two puppies we'll have to drag round. Agh!! Made her day though..she said "they're TWINS!"....so sweet:)

She also brought this home from preschool. Thanksgiving dinner according to Grace: beef, shrimp, oranges, crackers and "pop." Oh dear.

And last but not least....Klaire's Friday night dance party.

Speaking of dance party, we had a great time in Des Moines with the girls. Wicked was a cool show, and there are many stories to add to the "remember when" list:)

We made it!

2011-11-11T10:17:00.000-06:00

We made it to Friday. Sometimes that's an accomplishment in itself, no? The girls had a good week. Drop offs were mostly good, no all out fits of screaming and crying, and less "talking them down" from worrying about what's next. Maybe we are finally getting the hang of this, or maybe it's random and just going to happen from time to time. Whatever it is, I'll take the calm. Hopefully not before the storm!

This weekend I get to go on a bit of a girls trip. We're gonna get Wicked in Des Moines, and I can't wait. It's gonna be awesome!

what a difference a day can make

2011-11-03T13:59:00.001-05:00

Yesterday it was cold, and windy. It rained then turned to the first snow of the season. Yesterday the girls were very upset at drop off. They had preschool in the morning, then daycare in the afternoon. You'd have thought I was bringing them to a brand new daycare they've never seen and surprise attacking them! They went ballistic, screaming crying, losing their minds when I dropped them off. It was ridiculous, disheartening, and plain awful.

Today the sun is shining. It's a beautiful Fall day. Today they had daycare in the morning and preschool in the afternoon. Grace told me this morning that "she thought about it in bed last night and today is going to be a great day!" She was right. We had a discussion about even though you may not want to go to daycare/preschool/etc, there are things in life you must do. They are fine there, safe, and have friends there! Klaire even was fine at preschool drop off this afternoon. Lately she's been crying (even with Rick) for no apparent reason, except one day she did tell me "preschool makes me missing you mommy." Talk about make my heart melt:( Today she asked for 2 kisses, 2 hugs and 2 bye bye's. Done!

To get to the point of this post: I need to realize that just because one day is terrible, doesn't meant that all the following ones will be. Although they do tend to trend that way, it doesn't mean it's a given. My mom tells me this when I call her in tears after peeling kids off my legs at one drop off or another. I'm wondering if this just all too many "drop offs"! I did read that a 4 year old can go through just as real separation anxiety as a 2 year old. hmmm. Could be, however, they are able to reason and understand better than a 2 year old, so I'm not letting them totally off the hook.

I'll guess I will just keep praying for sunny days.

Halloween 2011

2011-10-31T22:02:00.001-05:00

I'm posting these now because I know if I don't do it tonight, it might never happen. We lucked out AGAIN this year with amazing weather and a fabulous Halloween. We had two very predictable, but very adorable Princesses this year. (It so much easier to buy costumes than make them!) Cousin Jackson and lots of fam came over to hit the streets (we missed you Des Moines crew!!!). The girls knew right what to do and all three were saying Trick or Treat and I heard many thank you's! Always nice to hear. We came back to the house to sneak one too many candy bars and it was off to bed. This year they were in bed by 8:20, we are preschoolers you know, we need our beauty sleep!

Vala's Pumpkin Patch

2011-10-29T21:35:00.000-05:00

We had a great afternoon at Vala's today! More to come:)

we let them quit:(

2011-10-25T08:28:00.001-05:00

I say we because Brian fully supported the decision. We decided to stop dance class. The crying, screaming, begging, basically panic attacks by both of them starting on Sundays for the Tuesday class were just too much to handle, for all of us. Especially for an extra curricular activity that is supposed to be FUN. I'm not sure if this was all just too much at once, but either way, we'll try again when they are older (if they WANT to). I realize this was not a great "life lesson" for them, but it was for me!...don't prepay anything that involves kids! Brian also suggested that maybe they should be in different extra curricular activities when they are older, to take away some of that twin thing they have going (if one gets upset the other might as well join in don't ya know!?) I think this is brilliant, and hope they will branch out to have their own interests. They did end up giving me some of my money back and reassured me that this happens sometimes). So there you have it. I wish they could be the "normal" little girls that go and have fun and don't freak out about every little things, but for now...they aren't there yet. I'm really upset about it and am second guessing the decision, a lot....but I guess that's parenting 101.

bump (in the road?)

2011-10-19T14:02:00.000-05:00

Lets get that depressing post bumped down on the blog! Dance went a little better this week. Klaire was most upset, I think because of the fact that she got left in class and had to deal with the chaos that was Grace and I that night. I ended up breaking the studios rules (come on they are just in a preschool class!) and going in the class with them. I sat on the floor in the back and didn't say a word. They sort of participated in the back with me, and I could tell they TOTALLY wanted to join in. Progress. Baby steps, I'm hoping this was just a bump in the road to them enjoying dance eventually (again). Grace has been doing better, not quite as defiant. She has now been asking over and over the weeks schedule. Then the night before getting all upset about what is coming up the next day. sigh. She's also been really "edgy" and Brian and I both feel like were are always on the verge of setting her off. I teeter between giving into her too much as to not set her off, and feeling like that might turn her into a spoiled brat. There will be no spoiled brats in my house! We're getting there. If I've learned anything in the last 4 years its that I'll always be learning about this parenting thing. Anyway, this is verging on depressing again...I'm feeling much more optimistic and excited for Halloween. We are going to have a couple of princesses in the house, as if we don't already!?

I added the pictures from our Caboose "camping" trip too!

the worry gene

2011-10-12T09:01:00.004-05:00

It's been awhile, I've been on a blog hiatus. Mostly because I've been super busy taking pictures, and making mittens. Quite the combo huh? I thought it would be a great idea to sign up for a craft fair the weekend after Thanksgiving, but I didn't factor in the time spent on pictures and making the darn mittens. We'll see how many get made, and hope for the best!

I've debated a lot whether or not to even go into the next thing, but I've always been honest on this little blog of mine, and the girls will read it so I guess someday they might find this interesting, insight into their childhood, at the very least.

I would venture to guess that most people want their kids to be like them, at least their positive traits! And hope and pray that the don't inherit the other things. Like bad hair, or teeth, or in this case anxiety. Let me back up. I think I've mentioned before that I was an anxious kid. It held me back, alot. I didn't want to try new things, forget about team sports and I think I was kind of a social outcast for most of my school days. Yikes huh? I had a few friends, but always felt a little off. I would stay up at night worrying about strange things, things that would probably not ever actually happen (my mom remembers one time there was a 20/20 episode where a guy had his leg amputated because of cancer, and I worried about that happening to me for at least a week). Or I remember as far back as 1st grade worrying I would get in the wrong lunch line. No big deal to most kids, but I absolutely dreaded it! As I got older I could reason with myself and talk myself into that fact that these things are not going to happen, and situations can be dealt with. But it took a long time and MANY nights of my mom dragging these worries out of me, to try to talk them out.

So you are probably wondering what I'm getting at. It's Grace. Ugh. It makes me SO sad that I see myself in her. It started one night when she had a field trip with preschool the next day. I heard her in her room crying and thought maybe she was sick. Nope, she was up worrying about getting on the van, and going to the fire station. In that moment I knew she got the "worry gene" we call it in my family. Now I know all kids worry about things, I'm not diagnosing her a full blown mental case (although I might be?). I tried my best to talk her through it, went through all the steps of what was going to occur, give her something to look forward to AFTER the event, all the things that used to help me. Because I do remember that not feeling validated, or having these feelings just swept under the rug, made it all the worse. (Have I mentioned my mom is a saint?). She ended up getting on the van and mostly participating in the field trip, but it was a struggle.

We had conferences last night and preschool in general is not going great for Grace. You wouldn't know that from talking to her though. She talks about her teacher like she LOVES her, all the kids in her class by name and what they did that day. She sings the songs they sing, is learning to write her letters, and the sounds the letters make, etc etc. But, she won't talk. She plays by herself, only says about two words when prompted and basically forced to. She hardly ever eats snack because she won't ask for it. The only time she will talk is on the playground. I have no idea why, well yes I do, she's anxious. I guess the fact that she has no problems going to preschool and at drop-off (which is another story with daycare which boggles my mind since they've been there since they were babies!), and looks forward to it every day should make me feel better, but I just so wish she could open up and show them the real Grace, the fun, spirited, LOUD, silly, little girl. Maybe in time.

That leads me to dance class. The girls went to 5 weeks of dance class, without a hitch, they loved it. After 2 weeks their teacher had a baby so they had a sub. The 6th week, as we were putting her shoes on, she literally froze and wouldn't let me put them on. All she would say was "I'm not going. I can't go, I'm not going." She didn't cry, or throw a fit, just froze. Klaire was already in the room and even that didn't entice her. I admittedly did not handle the situation well and it ended up Klaire saw me struggling with Grace and started crying, the teachers brought her out and the only thing I could think to do was get the heck out of there, as they were both crying at that point. Epic fail. They had this week off, so we are going to try again next week. I try to bring it up in passing, and get them both excited about it again, even told her Genevieve could come with, but we'll see if it goes any better. Did I mention I paid the year in full? That was stupid.

Ugh, so there you have it. I am reading a book on anxiety in kids, and am finally getting to the chapters that give some concrete things to do to try to help. It talks about the "anxiety dance" between you and your child and how to stop the cycle, give them coping skills to eventually be able to deal with the feelings on their own. I'm hoping this helps, because on top of all of that she has been totally defiant and naughty at home. I have a feeling it's from bottling up all that energy, etc for 3 hours at preschool and trying to deal with the feelings she's having, that's what the book said anyway. It seems that Klaire is in the clear so far. I've asked Brian if he ever had any of this crap as a kid. He could only recall going through a phase of worrying about death. Textbook. I hope that Klaire can keep being more like him:) He doesn't really understand what's going on since he never experienced it, but always reassures me that they will end up ok. Let's hope he's right.

Scooters

2011-10-07T10:59:00.000-05:00

Mom! That S has a ponytail!

Somersaults!

2011-09-27T13:23:00.000-05:00

Done!

2011-09-23T15:29:00.000-05:00

Grace saw Dr. Troia again today, and like I assumed he's going to let her try to go without the patch. He said her progress has been awesome and it looks very straight (but he used his fancy words for it). I laughed and said, "of course, I have a whole box of patches left!" He told me to keep them because you never know. So the plan is to watch and see if her eye wanders out more often, and if so we'll call and probably go back to a few hours a day. Wait and see!

It's Western Day at preschool and much to Klaires delight she got the green light to wear Jessie one more time!

Grace went with a more urban cowgirl look:)

Caboose Camping!

2011-09-12T09:06:00.001-05:00

This weekend we went camping! Well sort of. Two Rivers has fun cabooses to rent and they book up waaaay in advance, so we couldn't get one until September which worked out because the weather was perfect. The girls had an absolute blast, and fun was had by all! Our good friends and kiddos for the girls to play were out too in their neato campers. Grandpa Mark, Grandma Vicki, Em and Steve came out to visit and celebrate Grandpas birthday! They even went fishing for the first time! I have tons of pictures to go through, so for now here are the ones from my phone.

First Dance Class

2011-09-06T20:03:00.001-05:00

The anxiously awaited first dance class was tonight. I left work a little early because I wasn't sure how long it was going to take to pull on tights and put hair in buns, and class is at 5:30. I think we'll be fine with timing as long as everyone cooperates. ha. The girlies were super excited and raring to go. Klaire did NOT like having her hair like that, but she doesn't like when I even touch it, so that was not surprising.
They were equally excited when we got to the studio and went right in when the teacher let them. She just happens to be having a baby in the next couple weeks! You guys wouldn't believe how adorable she is (all the other moms and I in the waiting area decided we don't like her very much because of this!) They told us we could peek in the window but to please not stand and watch the whole class. I did pretty good, not because I was worried, but it was SO fun to see them stretch, hop around, and giggle with the other girls. They seemed to love it and are already asking if we get to go back tomorrow. I reeeeally wanted to bring my camera, but resisted and will wait until the visitor nights to indulge myself. We did take a few before we left the house.

I asked them to show me their moves...

Yellow Day

2011-09-01T14:19:00.000-05:00

Today is yellow day at preschool. Klaire is THRILLED! Grace keeps asking when pink day is!? (They are only doing the basic colors). I just realized the only time I ever take their picture any more is with their backpacks on!