Everyone's Child

Yes, this is an inactive blog

2010-11-13T09:28:00.000-07:00

Blame Facebook. Blame life. Blame me, since I am definitely for personal responsibility. I have deleted a lot of stuff (mainly trying to get rid of a nagging malware warning.). I am leaving the blog up, but I am deleting most of the site. My life has moved and changed. My responsibilities have changed. I am working on getting the Arizona Children's Legislative Advocacy Network up and running. I am working on making Southwest Network a leader in children's behavioral health.

I am especially enjoying my garden and home:

Peace, and I am still on the net, but really, most of my stuff is on Facebook.

The Formal Announcement

2010-03-14T21:44:00.001-07:00

Vive l'Internet! Through the magic of the internet, it is much easier to let all those interested and asking that yes, Chris and I are getting married, and a date has been set.

When we got engaged in 2008, Chris and I had a much larger wedding we started planning that included all our nearest and dearest. We made a decision to buy the house instead, and have not regretted it. This has put the larger, more inclusive plans on the shelf for around 2-3 years.

We now, as many of you know, need to change our legal status for multiple reasons. After discussions, we decided to not just do a JP wedding, and are having a simple ceremony on April 11th. It is going to be very small and no frills. This puts us in the unenviable position of letting our dear friends and Ohana know that by the very nature of our plans, we can't invite all those we would love to have join us on this special day. Those we are inviting have been notified, and we can promise pictures for the rest.

We are keeping this very simple, and do not have plans to register anywhere. We are open to planning a house party with friends in the future to celebrate, but have not made any decisions about that at the moment. We thank you for respecting the choices we have made, and appreciate questions, encouragement, and love from everyone.

Politics as usual

2010-03-07T12:09:00.000-07:00

Our current state political situation is a mess. We do not have a budget. People are losing vital services, including medical care. They are closing entire departments of the state government. Decisions are being made that will negatively affect the state for decades.
My job is in danger. Chris' job is in danger. My children's welfare is in danger. The people are starting to rise up, but no one in a position of power is listening.
Via PAFCO:

Imagine the Jobing.com arena full of the children turned away from child care for their working parents this year. The Legislature is filling every seat with a child denied care and their parents standing by, not able to work. That doesn't make economic at all. These types of cuts are not solutions. Push back and resist these types of cuts. They don’t make any economic or humane sense. Contact your legislators. There are options. (By the way, the number of children denied care will exceed 17,000, while their parents lose work or go on public assistance (if that still exists).

OTHER proposed Human Services cuts

· 10,000 families (most female-headed) with 17,000 children are proposed to lose cash assistance --- for families already by definition very poor driving these families into deeper poverty effective April 1, 2010 if passed by the Legislature. This is an attack on some of the poorest of the poor with no where else to turn. Results will be increased homeless, desperation, illness, and family dislocation.

· 11,000 on child care turn away list with many more to be turned away from child care with child care permanently closed for the foreseeable future stopping families from working and putting children at risk.

· No 100% investigations of child protection or adult protection referrals and continued elimination of family support services. The system of in home family services has already been cut severely in the 2009/2010 cuts and will now be cut even with more families losing services and their children potentially going into foster care.

· Cuts in emergency services (eviction prevention, homeless prevention, etc) services for families in crisis effecting meaning 1,100 fewer families will receive emergency services.

· Cuts in domestic violence services reducing service to 1,600 victims of domestic violence will be turned away from shelters.

· Cuts in aging independent living services impacting hundreds of elderly and people with disabilities.

· Eliminate support for grandparents caring for their grandchildren.

· Eliminate state only supported services for children and adults with developmental disabilities throwing 300 children and 400 adults off services.

· Elimination of the Department of Juvenile Corrections transferring youth to county detention centers in the counties throwing almost 900 people out of work and dumping these youths on the local governments already overburdened with their own budget problems.

· Implementation of many new fees and means testing for programs like adoption services for children with disabilities, services for children and adults with disabilities --- potentially leaving many children and adults at serious risk and costing more downstream as high cost services are used.

· A summary of proposed cuts and implications for the Department of Economic Security can be found at https://egov.azdes.gov/cmsinternet/uploadedFiles/Office_of_Communications/FY11_Executive_Recommendation.pdf?n=1089

· Click here for a list of major budget cuts proposed to children and families from Children’s Action Alliance. http://www.azchildren.org/MyFiles/10%20Legislature/Gov_Budget_FY11.pdf

So what can a person do? I am trying to organize the power of a unified voice, but my time is limited. The children's advocacy network I am organizing is growing faster than I can keep up with it. Individual voices make a difference. Call, write, visit your legislators. Find out who represents you and what they stand for. If you don't like it, work to get someone in office who does represent you. Talk to people. The average person is too busy to pay attention until it impacts them directly. Guess what? This years budget will impact you directly, no matter who you are.

Political processes are not some far off thing. They are directly affected by us and are accessible to us. I will break down some of the ways to have a voice in upcoming posts.

Dodgeball Tournament

2010-01-30T20:44:00.001-07:00

Dodgeball Tournament, originally uploaded by katydaqueen.

So, I got to attend my first event as a High School mom. Konal signed up on a dodgeball team for a fundraising tournament. He will freely admit he can't throw, but is great at blocking and dodging. So it was, as he was last one left in both of the rounds. Unfortunately, his team still lost.

Meanwhile, car related incidents keep racking up. Yesterday it was a flat tire and today I locked my keys in my car. This wouldn't have been a huge issue, because it was at the QT within walking distance of the house, and we were running early. Unfortunately, there were three major issues. The first is that I only have 1 set of keys after a dastardly thief stole Chris' bag when he had car trouble last fall. Thanks to modern electronics, a replacement set puts us out over $100.
The second issue is that I locked my phone in the car as well. We had other cellphones available, but roadside assistance is tied to my phone.
The third is that Chris had just had his windshield replaced and wasn't supposed to drive yet.
Family to the rescue! Mom wasn't picking up her phone, but Cousin Katie came to the rescue and took the boys to the tournament. Chris came to the QT and I called the Tow truck from his phone, which also has roadside assistance. I had to call Verizon first, because when they switched Alltel to Verizon, they changed numbers for roadside assistance and it wasn't in our Alltel phones.

The good news? For the first time ever, the guy was earlier than projected by dispatch, unlocked, and I was able to get to the tournament in time to see my boy lose with panache and dignity. All is well that ends well, but I am so not leaving the house tomorrow! ;)

Call for Mental Health Advocacy

2010-01-20T20:51:00.003-07:00

My dear friends, peers and colleagues, As you are probably aware of, the state of Arizona is undergoing a challenge in regards to budget and income.

Cuts are taking place throughout the state that are potentially devastating to families. Many social service and children’s system advocates are already making their presence known to lawmakers at the capitol, trying to make them aware of the human cost of these cuts, the long range increase in costs be taking away preventative services, and pushing the idea that there are other ways of dealing with the current funding issues than lump sum cuts.

One of the missing pieces of this puzzle is a united advocacy effort for Children’s Mental Health. The pieces are there, but no one has tied them together. With some of the access avenues for families to attain services being cut or threatened, such as non-title 19 funds and KidsCare, the urgency for a united voice for families has exponentially increased.

I would like to start the ball rolling on this, but I can’t do it alone. I would like to put together a few different things, like a legislative alert mailing list, a citizen’s advocacy training on how to approach legislators, and a day at the Legislature.

If you would like to be involved, or have something you can contribute to this effort, please let me know at kris.long@gmail.com or 623-570-7232 This can be done on volunteer time with no funding, but one person can’t do it alone. Please distribute this, and we can let the Capitol know the importance of Children’s Mental Health services to Arizona's future!

Krista Kathryn Long, BSW Parent & Advocate

Ob La Di Ob La Da..

2010-01-18T12:47:00.003-07:00

And life goes on. Yes, it has been since September. A lot has happened in that time. The rain is falling and the weather is changing around here. It seems like a good time to write.

First, I know you are dying to know. We moved right before Thanksgiving, and the time since then has been full of the joy of living in a half finished house. Today is cleaning day, and that is a challenge, since there are still unpainted walls to be tackled. Because of the move, I was without internet consistently for about 2 months. That was interesting, and definitely contributed to my silence.

Konal is still living at his dad's house. He has asked to change that many times, but decided not to at the last minute. The drama gets interesting, but he is doing well, and I am very proud of him.

Aidan has adjusted to his new Arts Charter school. I'm having trouble adjusting to the 7 mile drive to drop him off and pick him up. I have cobbled together a network of making sure he gets there and home when I have to work. Last week he brought home an award for most improved. This is the first award he has gotten since preschool for academics. I am proud of him as well.

Chris and I are adjusting to life together. Like any couple, we have our moments, but they are fleeting. We are struggling with money because of the house and the debt we incurred to renovate, mainly. It will get better- the fun part is just trying to keep gas in the vehicles and eating while we figure it out.

I am finally an official college graduate. My degree arrived last week. I got a pleasant surprise when my work reimbursed some of the tuition as well. I am persistent if anything. I am now studying for the GRE and trying to figure out where the money is going to come for licensure. It is not a cheap process.

I am not sure what I am going to do for my master's. ASU has a dual MSW/Masters of Public Policy program that I am eying. I wanted to go to Portland Oregon, but life has settled down here and it would be wrong to uproot the family. Although, with the political and financial state of AZ, I am tempted with leaving.

Jobs are still touch and go. There are threats to funding every week, and it has come down to a "what will be, will be" kind of attitude. I am still uninsured, and they are threatening to cut KidsCare, which would affect Aidan as well. Chris and I may have to get married, but it will hurt us financially at a time we are fragile. It is all one great big balancing act.

To celebrate Martin Luther King Jr day, Chris & I took Aidan (with his willing agreement) to the Human Rights March against Arpaio and racial profiling.

I am for comprehensive and compassionate immigration reform. I don't believe we have enough acceptable ways for desperate people to do it the right way. I am for basic human and civil rights. The march was peaceful, but we had some violence where we were at when a self-professed Anarchist faction started pushing into the police and causing trouble. Chris and I started getting Aidan out of there. One of the dangers for standing up for what you believe in. I am proud to have marched, and so sore now- it was about 8 miles round trip.

From Human Rights March

Heading back to the car post march. "Obama: Where is the reform?"

And life goes on....

Quote #2

2009-09-18T10:00:00.001-07:00

The non-violent approach does not immediately change the heart of the oppressor. It first does something to the heart and souls of those committed to it. It gives them a new self-respect; it calls up resources of strength and courage that they did not know they had. Finally it reaches the opponent and so stirs his conscience that reconciliation becomes a reality. - Martin Luther King

Excellent Quote

2009-09-17T20:11:00.003-07:00

Consider today whether you are being called to a new capacity of loving that you would never find if it were not for this relationship. Once you exercise fear and make it your practice, once you try resentment and make it your habit, once you employ aggression and make it routine, those actions will dominate your destiny. No matter how painfully uou've been wronged, stand in love in the midst of a huge temptation to be vengeful, prideful, or hold back. The real nature of love is that the person you think has betrayed you the most is actually an agent of the divine offering you the opportunity for grace. - Mary Manin Morrissey

Activism- sometimes small, sometimes big...

2009-09-01T16:25:00.001-07:00

I can't keep my big mouth shut, eh?

Arizona Moves Backward on Health Care Coverage

Nearly 10,000 Parents Slated to Lose Coverage September 30

(Phoenix, AZ) Although Arizona is operating without an adopted, balanced budget in place for this fiscal year, state agencies are implementing dramatic budget cuts that endanger children and families throughout our state. Due to a failure of the legislature to appropriate funding for KidsCare Parents, nearly 10,000 working parents are scheduled to lose their health insurance on September 30, 2009.

“It is outrageous that our legislature would propose permanently cutting taxes on the one hand while simultaneously eliminating health insurance for nearly 10,000 working parents on the other hand,” said Dana Wolfe Naimark, President and CEO of Children’s Action Alliance (CAA). “When parents have health insurance, they are more likely to take their kids to the doctor for the checkups they need, and when parents can keep themselves healthy, they are better able to care for their children,” added Naimark. “Eliminating KidsCare Parents moves Arizona in the wrong direction.”

Parents began receiving notification in the past week that their insurance would end in just over a month. Many were shocked and uncertain where to turn. “I had not heard that KidsCare Parents was in jeopardy,” said Krista Long, a parent who receives health insurance through KidsCare Parents. “With KidsCare Parents, I don’t have to choose between my medication and food, like I used to,” she added. “When I received notification that my coverage was ending, my stomach hurt and I panicked. I don’t know what I will do without KidsCare Parents.”

In fact, there are few or no places for these parents to turn to find affordable health coverage. Most do not have coverage through their employers or the premiums are more than they can afford. Many have no options in the private market due to pre-existing health conditions.

The Arizona Health Care Cost Containment System (AHCCCS), which administers KidsCare Parents, informed parents losing coverage they may wish to contact Community Health Centers, which don’t offer health insurance but provide primary health care services on a sliding fee scale. However, CHCs are also facing limited funding at a time of increased need.

“Arizona’s Community Health Centers provide quality primary and preventive health care for hundreds of thousands of Arizonans, regardless of whether they have health insurance,” said Tara McCollum Plese, Director of Government and Media Relations for the Arizona Association of Community Health Centers. “However, drastic cuts in state funding that allows CHCs to provide services to the uninsured on a sliding fee scale has created an increase in the number of uncompensated visits for our members,” added Plese. “The elimination of KidsCare Parents health insurance coverage for nearly 10,000 working parents will strain the Community Health Centers even further.”

As of August 1, 2009, 9,564 Arizona working parents with incomes below 200 percent of the federal poverty level – or about $44,000 for a family of four – were enrolled in KidsCare Parents. Parents pay premiums up to $100 a month for their own coverage. Of the remaining funding, 76% comes from the federal government, with the state paying $60 to $70 per month per parent. Under current federal law, Arizona can continue receiving this strong level of federal support for KidsCare Parents through at least October 2011, although the matching rate may decline slightly after that.

“State lawmakers who voted for wiping out this parent coverage need to understand the real life consequences of their budget cuts,” Naimark concluded. “Families will suffer damage to their health, expensive emergency room visits will put more strain on hospitals, and many families will be forced to quit their jobs and spend down their savings so that they qualify for AHCCCS Medicaid coverage. At that point, parents will not pay any premiums, federal funding will go down, and the cost to the state budget will go up.”

Children’s Action Alliance is a non-profit, non-partisan organization dedicated to promoting the well-being of all of Arizona’s children and their families through research, policy development, media campaigns and advocacy. www.azchildren.org.

Health Care Resources for Arizona’s Low-Income and Uninsured Families

Children’s Action Alliance offers a directory of health care resources available to low-income and uninsured families in Arizona at http://www.azchildren.org/MyFiles/PDF/2008%20Health%20Manual%20-%20FINAL%20ENGLISH%20-%20updated%202-09.pdf

This resource manual provides information on Community Health Centers, medical discount programs, and discounted clinics throughout the state.

To contact any of the following parents receiving health insurance through KidsCare Parents, please contact Children’s Action Alliance:

Krista L., of the West Valley, is a single mother of two children who overcame homelessness and graduated from college. Krista has a chronic health condition, and works part time so she can be home in the afternoons with her son who has disabilities. She fears she may have to further drop her work hours so her income is low enough for her to qualify for Medicaid through AHCCCS.

Susan S. works full time for a company providing support to attorneys. She does not have insurance through her employer. Her son was born with a variety of life-threatening heart conditions that require monitoring and treatment. Susan also has health issues that require attention. Thanks to KidsCare coverage for them both, they have been able to stay active and Susan has been able to work to provide for her family.

Robyn G. works full time providing home care for her elderly aunt. Her husband loves working in construction. Neither have health coverage through their jobs. They live with their two teenage children; one has special medical needs. Thanks to KidsCare, their children have their own doctor. They have all gotten the treatment they need to stay healthy and stay out of the emergency room. Robyn doesn’t know what they will do without KidsCare coverage for her and her husband.

Dispelling Myths

2009-08-20T06:20:00.001-07:00

I know Patrick professionally- he is a medical Social Worker. Tonight he tweeted something that struck a nerve: "I am tired of doctors and people today acting like I have a worthless degree... so I am out of here... It has been a real hard day!!!" (Sorry, Patrick for copying without asking first).
This struck a chord with me.
I remember when I went to school, when people asked me what I was getting my degree in, I would get these sighs and "I'm sorry" or "you are a better person than I" when I said Social Work.
I also deal with the lack of respect for the degree, which is considered a professional degree and a type of licensure in and of itself.
No one seems to know what a Social Worker is, or what we do. I think it is hard because there is a lot of variety in the preofession. I know that people assume that Social Workers take kids away, and the archetype of the bad or burned out Social Worker is ever present and reinforced in the media.

According to the National Association of Social Workers, the definition of a Social Worker is:
Social Work is the professional activity of helping individuals, groups, or communities enhance or restore their capacity for social functioning and creating societal conditions favorable to this goal. Social Work practice consists of the professional application of Social Work values, principles, and techniques to one or more of the following ends: helping people obtain tangible services; counseling and psychotherapy with individuals, families, and groups; helping communities or groups provide or improve processes. The practice of Social Work requires knowledge of human development and behavior; of social, economic, and cultural institutions; and of the interactions of all these factors.

Wikipedia has more on standards: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_work

You have questions, I want to hear them. Doing my part to promote my profession and have people congratulate me instead of pity me.

And yes, I had a bad day too....

Weekend Update

2009-08-03T07:09:00.002-07:00

Every bone in my body hurts. We washed, taped, spackled and started to paint. It was a productive weekend. There is the expected "grass is greener" reaction from the boys regarding their respective rooms with keep out signs being made and fighting ensuing.

Things are going well, though. Only one room left for paint color decisions, and we consulted with a contractor regarding the major repairs.

Happy Homeowners

2009-07-28T06:53:00.002-07:00

Today is July 28th, 2009 and my last post was May 19th. There are lots of reasons for this, including getting sucked into the vortex that is Facebook.

Konal moving out was extremely hard on me emotionally, and it was not something I wanted to process in public, out of respect for him. He is doing well and starts high school in 2 weeks.

I turned 35 last week. That should be its own post, but the bulk of the day was spent dealing with this:

Welcome to your first look at Casa Chula. Papers were signed and money was paid on my birthday, and last night we got the keys. This is the start of much happiness and poverty for us. The street is Calle Chulo, which is where we got the name. Chulo/a means cute, but also means pimp in some dialects. Chris and I get a kick out of that.

We have a lot of work ahead of us until we can move, and because of some financing issues, we are going to have to do it in stages. When we walked in last night, there were puddles in the kitchen and in the bathroom from leaks.

Homeownership is such a strange journey. So much excitement, and so much worry. I have a litany of what ifs in my brain, and I fuss a lot about money and a budget. Our mortgage is low, but there are so many repairs to do.

In other news, years ago I promised Aidan that when we move out of Nana's house, he could have his own cat. Meet Isis, the kitten.

Isis was born on May 1st, and has been a lot of fun. I forgot how much kittens were like having babies around.

School starts Aug 3rd. Aidan is mad at me, because he has to start at Western Sky, then I am moving him to a charter school. The school in our new neighborhood sucks, and he is 3rd on the waiting list, so he will probably get in the charter school, but not until the week after school starts.

I will not be such a stranger. I totally blame Facebook, because it couldn't be my fault, now, could it?

Poor Arizona

2009-05-19T22:23:00.001-07:00

Perspectives

2009-05-14T18:07:00.002-07:00

As I rush through my daily life, it often is very beneficial to stop and considering things through another's perspective. This video should be required watching for anyone working with children, because you never know when you will be working with a child with this experience. One of the hardest things I have dealt with in my job is disrupted placements and adoptions.

h/t to Eyes Opened Wider

If you would like a transcript, there is one available here.

And I just keep running in circles

2009-05-12T08:32:00.002-07:00

I haven't posted much for a multitude of reasons. I want to post the details on the house, but am waiting until we close. This process has taken a ton of work and is going to be so totally worth it. We keep getting entangled in red tape, though. Apparently, the Realtors, Mortgage Brokers and Title Agencies are completely overextended with all the sales right now. Amazing how that happens. Lower the prices and people buy houses they can afford.

It looks like we are getting a lovely 1980's 4-bedroom brick home for $85,000. We are getting around $30000 in a 203k loan to renovate the place. Most of the issues are deferred maintenance and homeowner done repairs. I will not commit to anything or buy anything until we know the house is ours. The only thing I have bought was boxes for Konal to pack for his move to Dad's. I am going to start packing soon, but right now, I just want to get the house bought.

I am sick again. I hate having a lowered immune system. I am home today because I always get sicker the day after I start antibiotics. Even though I have bronchitis, I am also dealing with some gastric issues that are not letting me get far from a bathroom. I have a meeting at 10:30 that I am going to call into and a buttload of paperwork and billing I will work on this afternoon.

Aidan leaves for Math & Science camp tomorrow. He is very excited!

I finally joined Facebook after years of resistance. I'm scared. :)

A cat in a patch of sun

2009-05-11T13:18:00.001-07:00

DSC00009, originally uploaded by foole_of_hearts.

I went to a surprise birthday party after a weekend at Partners in Policymaking. Lo and behold, on a friends Flickr stream is this lovely photo. Yes, I am sound asleep in a patch of sunlight on a very comfy poof.

Life is good.

Faces of Hope

2009-05-08T02:05:00.005-07:00

It is 2 am, and I am still up refining a presentation I am giving next week. I need to have the powerpoint ready for a planning meeting tomorrow. This presentation is one of the hardest for me. I am one of four parents telling their story at an agency. We have been asked to share the joys and the sorrows of our journey.

Because of this, I finally got off my duff and converted my old video tape of the ABC's 20/20 episode we were on in 2000. I was hoping to get a second chance when they contacted me last year and wanted to profile us as a successful family. That fell through- I guess successful doesn't sell.

In reviewing it, I found myself cringing over and over at the language used. It was so negative. I am still trying to load the clip up to Myspace, because they allow longer times, but in the meantime I can post the highly edited version here to show you what I mean.

From Videos

For that reason, I entitled my presentation "From Despair to Hope". I used my graduation video and the retrospective I recently put together to balance the presentation out, as well as to illustrate one fact: we have come such a very long way. My baby is growing up, and he is going to be just fine.

To Do List on the New House

2009-05-04T22:09:00.002-07:00

Forgive the disjointedness of this post. It was written as a line by line to my mortgage broker and was accompanied by scanned in estimates which would make it less confusing.

This is probably cheating, but on the other hand, it is all that is on my mind right now...

OK- Priority Repairs. The plumber did not give me individual estimates, but a total. I have the individuals when I can from shopping around at places like Lowe's. I included my "wishlist if we are able to fund them" items, but obviously, the priority repairs come first. Chris and I really want to be environmentally friendly (not to mention lowering our daily cost of living) so all the new installs are low-flo, eco systems wherever we can. I know I am forgetting something.... Let me know if you have trouble reading anything.

Roof- $6364

Insulation: R-40 $900

Wishlist: Active Attic Fan: $250

Solar Attic Fan: $450

Room by Room:

Garage:

Garage Door: $1500

Hot Water Heater: $800

Wishlist: Solar Water Heater $5000 before incentives ($325 after)

Water Softener (Priority, because all the faucets have to be replaced due to mineral deposits) $1000-$3000 for a high end system (I am thinking the $1200 range)

Kitchen:

New cabinets, minor electrical work, and new sink & faucet. See Hultzman estimate, although countertops will add another $600 according to him verbally. I have more estimates lined up, but not until after we close. I forgot to have them add in connecting the hood to the outside- Chris tends to make my smoke detectors go off.

Replace Garbage Disposal $100-$200, Dishwasher $400-$600, and stove $600-900. I pulled all the appliance costs from Lowe's.

New fan in dining room with light kit, plus electrical work (Ketring estimate + $70-$100 for fan)

Guest Bathroom:

Shower repair, new toilet, new cabinet/sink/faucet. Both Parker and Sons and Hultzman included this in their estimates. I forgot to have them estimate connecting the exhaust fan to the outside. It currently vents to the attic. That is on the priority list, though.

Master Bathroom

New shower (no way to repair the shower without removing surround, plus the glass doors are broken), new toilet and new faucet. Cabinet is fine.

Rest of house:

Repairing prior homeowner electrical issues with fan boxes in each room, plus installing new fans, including the outdoor fans.

Pulling out illegal propane hookup from Chimney (Estimate in Word Doc)

Fixing house water shut off valve in front of house.

Repairing hole in ceiling of family room. (Estimate including in Hultzman's)

Wishlist: Repairing unfinished closet in 4th bedroom

Wishlist: New flooring for 4th Bedroom.

Wishlist: Greywater system for watering landscaping: $3000

Wishlist: putting in closet system for Master Bedroom closet. No estimate on that yet.

So much to be done this summer. This doesn't include painting and moving and all that jazz.......

Nano!

2009-05-01T21:59:00.001-07:00

This warms the depths of my geeky heart. Nano technology explained for the masses.

The Nano Song from nanomonster on Vimeo.

No Flu!

2009-04-30T20:06:00.004-07:00

So, here in Maricopa county, three schools are being closed for 7 days due to the swine flu. My kids are worried, everyone is talking about it at work, and the internets are abuzz.

I have to help a family move tomorrow at work, then go to a candlelight vigil hosted by the Mental Health Awareness Coalition. The next day, I have a United Way event, then I need to create a presentation on what success in families looks like for a talk in 2 weeks. I also need to create the curriculm for a class I run. The topic this month is utility resources.

How is all this tied together. I am sitting here with a sore throat, stiff neck, and rapidly filling up nose, not to mention this awful headache that has created momzilla all evening.

Both the boys are complaining they don't feel well, as well. I doubt it is the swine flu, but even if it is, I am sunk. I have no paid time off.

To think I can't pursue the management job in Flagstaff someone recommended me for today. Sometimes, my life is too complicated.

Aidan's Surgery

2009-04-28T10:53:00.003-07:00

After successfully dodging my civic duty yesterday (actually, I was willing, but the timing was wrong) Aidan had his surgery this morning.

It happened, which was a miracle, since Aidan was trying his best to make it not happen. I am a bit zombie today. So is he.

Now for the healing and to get back to work.

Time after time

2009-04-26T20:28:00.002-07:00

I have mentioned it before. Konal is moving in with his dad on May 22 (the last day of school). All of the arrangements are almost done. He is enrolled in high school there. His primary care physcian has been changed. I still have some details to take care of, but I delivered the notarized letter changing physical custody last week.

It sounds like he is moving far away, but it is only 20 miles. On the inside, I feel the distance getting farther and farther away. Konal is handling this like most kids, feeling that he needs to push me away in order to be closer to his dad. Intellectually I understand this, but emotionally my heart is breaking into itty bitty pieces. If you listen closely, you can hear it.

I think all we have been through together makes it harder. Holding him while he tries to hide from the hallucinations. Keeping him safe through the rages. Celebrating the victories and growth. Being there for him. So many Dr's appointments. So many moments of sadness and of joy.

I know this is a process all parents go through. I will get through this, and there is even a part of me that is looking forward to the break. I was even the one who suggested the move, noticing how much Konal was craving time with his Dad. I am still crying on the inside. I am scared. I am worried that it won't work. I am mourning the loss of control.

Meanwhile, I will be there to support his Dad and him during the transition. This couldn't have happened even a year ago- there was too much instability on both sides. Things are by no means easy still, but they are much, much better. I am not truly losing my little boy by any means. He is just moving on to another phase of life. And if it doesn't work out, I will be here...

Finally posting

2009-04-25T13:47:00.003-07:00

The Spring Fling we hosted at EMPACT is over and much fun was had by all. I hate running events, because they consume every waking moment of your time. It was, however, a successful event which did what we set out to do- providing a chance for the families we serve to find community with each other.

I love it when we have events where staff's families get to mingle with the families we serve. I feel that it decreases the power differential and reminds both sides that in the end we are all just people dealing with the challenges life sends our way. I am much more sensitive on what it feels like to be on the other side of the glass partition because of our family's experiences. Any thing that can reduce that feeling of us vs. them is worth pursuing.

In other news, we are still in process of buying the house. Our offer of 85K was accepted, and now we are securing the mortgage and renovation loan. We have all the estimates in for the roof, re-doing the kitchen and bathrooms, the landscaping, the electrical work and the new hot water heater. We are also installing more insulation and an alarm system, as well as maintenance on the AC and fireplace.

It is only a mile away from where we are now. The schools suck, but I have Aidan on the waiting list for an arts academy about 5 miles away. I can always leave Aidan enrolled in his current schools.

We have to have the funding secured by May 11th and we close on May 25th. I am finding that buying a house is a lot like having a baby- everyone tells you their horror stories. I wasn't worried about the mortgage until everyone started sharing their stories. Oi!

Speaking of Aidan, he has surgery on Tuesday. It is minor surgery- ingrown toenail removal- but he is a bit scared of medical procedures (he completely flips out, actually). He wouldn't let the podiatrist do it in his office, so we have to admit him in the hospital and knock the boy out.

Monday I have jury duty. As a social worker, I have never been picked for a jury, but it is still a hassle. I am also still doing hand therapy twice a week. Everytime I tell the therapist he has to have my hand ready for painting in 2 months, he shakes his head and sighs. I told him off the first visit because he said "interesting" way too many times. In my experience, interesting is not a good word when said in conjuction with medical issues.

And that, in a nutshell, is why I have not been posting. I will try harder. Tomorrow, Konal's move...

What does he think of me?

2009-04-08T19:55:00.003-07:00

Stolen from Mom-NOS. I interviewed Aidan, who is now 11 and typed in his responses directly. My prompts are in parantheses. Here is mom in the eyes of the boy.

1. What is something mom always says to you?

"Be Quiet." Wait... "Settle Down"

2. What makes mom happy?

Long Pause... "Uh, a Clean House"

3. What makes mom sad?

"I don't know?"

4. How does your mom make you laugh?

um, um, um.. "I don't know"

5. What was your mom like as a child?

"Nerdy"

6. How old is your mom?

"3..... 35? I think I am a year off. Well, I don't really know because people always tell me that if you ask a parent their age it is rude. Mom, what is your age?"

7. How tall is your mom?

5'6"

8. What is her favorite thing to do?

"Help people"

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?

"You go out with Chris and you go on your computer a lot"

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?

"Famous Social Worker"

11. What is your mom really good at?

"Sitting"

12. What is your mom not very good at?

"Singing"

13. What does your mom do for her job?

"She is a social worker for EMPACT Suicide Prevention Center Family Division" (I am impressed....)

14. What is your mom's favorite food?

"Healthy Stuff" (Like?) "Broccoli and Asparagus. Wait! Summer Rolls"

15. What makes you proud of your mom?

"You help lots and lots and lots and lots of people"

16. If your mom were a character in a book, who would she be?

"The nerdy social worker" (In what book?) "Realistic Fiction"

17. What do you and your mom do together?

"Sit around" "Oh, Oh, I know! Watch Dr. Who!"

18. How are you and your mom the same?

"We both like Dr. Who." "We both LOVE Dr. Who"

19. How are you and your mom different?

"Um, there's not much"

20. How do you know your mom loves you?

"She says so. Things like you're awesome and stuff like that"

21. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?

"Her Chair." (My Chair?) "You seem to enjoy relaxing in it"

Let me make you an offer

2009-04-05T20:17:00.001-07:00

After much looking and talking and filling out of papers today, we made offers on two houses. Now we wait. This waiting will not be uneventful. I am stressed out and need more air in my lungs. I didn't realize just how much all this would freak me out.