Everyone's Child

Quote #2

2009-09-18T10:00:00.001-07:00

The non-violent approach does not immediately change the heart of the oppressor. It first does something to the heart and souls of those committed to it. It gives them a new self-respect; it calls up resources of strength and courage that they did not know they had. Finally it reaches the opponent and so stirs his conscience that reconciliation becomes a reality. - Martin Luther King

Excellent Quote

2009-09-17T20:11:00.003-07:00

Consider today whether you are being called to a new capacity of loving that you would never find if it were not for this relationship. Once you exercise fear and make it your practice, once you try resentment and make it your habit, once you employ aggression and make it routine, those actions will dominate your destiny. No matter how painfully uou've been wronged, stand in love in the midst of a huge temptation to be vengeful, prideful, or hold back. The real nature of love is that the person you think has betrayed you the most is actually an agent of the divine offering you the opportunity for grace. - Mary Manin Morrissey

Activism- sometimes small, sometimes big...

2009-09-01T16:25:00.001-07:00

I can't keep my big mouth shut, eh?

Arizona Moves Backward on Health Care Coverage

Nearly 10,000 Parents Slated to Lose Coverage September 30

(Phoenix, AZ) Although Arizona is operating without an adopted, balanced budget in place for this fiscal year, state agencies are implementing dramatic budget cuts that endanger children and families throughout our state. Due to a failure of the legislature to appropriate funding for KidsCare Parents, nearly 10,000 working parents are scheduled to lose their health insurance on September 30, 2009.

“It is outrageous that our legislature would propose permanently cutting taxes on the one hand while simultaneously eliminating health insurance for nearly 10,000 working parents on the other hand,” said Dana Wolfe Naimark, President and CEO of Children’s Action Alliance (CAA). “When parents have health insurance, they are more likely to take their kids to the doctor for the checkups they need, and when parents can keep themselves healthy, they are better able to care for their children,” added Naimark. “Eliminating KidsCare Parents moves Arizona in the wrong direction.”

Parents began receiving notification in the past week that their insurance would end in just over a month. Many were shocked and uncertain where to turn. “I had not heard that KidsCare Parents was in jeopardy,” said Krista Long, a parent who receives health insurance through KidsCare Parents. “With KidsCare Parents, I don’t have to choose between my medication and food, like I used to,” she added. “When I received notification that my coverage was ending, my stomach hurt and I panicked. I don’t know what I will do without KidsCare Parents.”

In fact, there are few or no places for these parents to turn to find affordable health coverage. Most do not have coverage through their employers or the premiums are more than they can afford. Many have no options in the private market due to pre-existing health conditions.

The Arizona Health Care Cost Containment System (AHCCCS), which administers KidsCare Parents, informed parents losing coverage they may wish to contact Community Health Centers, which don’t offer health insurance but provide primary health care services on a sliding fee scale. However, CHCs are also facing limited funding at a time of increased need.

“Arizona’s Community Health Centers provide quality primary and preventive health care for hundreds of thousands of Arizonans, regardless of whether they have health insurance,” said Tara McCollum Plese, Director of Government and Media Relations for the Arizona Association of Community Health Centers. “However, drastic cuts in state funding that allows CHCs to provide services to the uninsured on a sliding fee scale has created an increase in the number of uncompensated visits for our members,” added Plese. “The elimination of KidsCare Parents health insurance coverage for nearly 10,000 working parents will strain the Community Health Centers even further.”

As of August 1, 2009, 9,564 Arizona working parents with incomes below 200 percent of the federal poverty level – or about $44,000 for a family of four – were enrolled in KidsCare Parents. Parents pay premiums up to $100 a month for their own coverage. Of the remaining funding, 76% comes from the federal government, with the state paying $60 to $70 per month per parent. Under current federal law, Arizona can continue receiving this strong level of federal support for KidsCare Parents through at least October 2011, although the matching rate may decline slightly after that.

“State lawmakers who voted for wiping out this parent coverage need to understand the real life consequences of their budget cuts,” Naimark concluded. “Families will suffer damage to their health, expensive emergency room visits will put more strain on hospitals, and many families will be forced to quit their jobs and spend down their savings so that they qualify for AHCCCS Medicaid coverage. At that point, parents will not pay any premiums, federal funding will go down, and the cost to the state budget will go up.”

Children’s Action Alliance is a non-profit, non-partisan organization dedicated to promoting the well-being of all of Arizona’s children and their families through research, policy development, media campaigns and advocacy. www.azchildren.org.

Health Care Resources for Arizona’s Low-Income and Uninsured Families

Children’s Action Alliance offers a directory of health care resources available to low-income and uninsured families in Arizona at http://www.azchildren.org/MyFiles/PDF/2008%20Health%20Manual%20-%20FINAL%20ENGLISH%20-%20updated%202-09.pdf

This resource manual provides information on Community Health Centers, medical discount programs, and discounted clinics throughout the state.

To contact any of the following parents receiving health insurance through KidsCare Parents, please contact Children’s Action Alliance:

Krista L., of the West Valley, is a single mother of two children who overcame homelessness and graduated from college. Krista has a chronic health condition, and works part time so she can be home in the afternoons with her son who has disabilities. She fears she may have to further drop her work hours so her income is low enough for her to qualify for Medicaid through AHCCCS.

Susan S. works full time for a company providing support to attorneys. She does not have insurance through her employer. Her son was born with a variety of life-threatening heart conditions that require monitoring and treatment. Susan also has health issues that require attention. Thanks to KidsCare coverage for them both, they have been able to stay active and Susan has been able to work to provide for her family.

Robyn G. works full time providing home care for her elderly aunt. Her husband loves working in construction. Neither have health coverage through their jobs. They live with their two teenage children; one has special medical needs. Thanks to KidsCare, their children have their own doctor. They have all gotten the treatment they need to stay healthy and stay out of the emergency room. Robyn doesn’t know what they will do without KidsCare coverage for her and her husband.

Dispelling Myths

2009-08-20T06:20:00.001-07:00

I know Patrick professionally- he is a medical Social Worker. Tonight he tweeted something that struck a nerve: "I am tired of doctors and people today acting like I have a worthless degree... so I am out of here... It has been a real hard day!!!" (Sorry, Patrick for copying without asking first).
This struck a chord with me.
I remember when I went to school, when people asked me what I was getting my degree in, I would get these sighs and "I'm sorry" or "you are a better person than I" when I said Social Work.
I also deal with the lack of respect for the degree, which is considered a professional degree and a type of licensure in and of itself.
No one seems to know what a Social Worker is, or what we do. I think it is hard because there is a lot of variety in the preofession. I know that people assume that Social Workers take kids away, and the archetype of the bad or burned out Social Worker is ever present and reinforced in the media.

According to the National Association of Social Workers, the definition of a Social Worker is:
Social Work is the professional activity of helping individuals, groups, or communities enhance or restore their capacity for social functioning and creating societal conditions favorable to this goal. Social Work practice consists of the professional application of Social Work values, principles, and techniques to one or more of the following ends: helping people obtain tangible services; counseling and psychotherapy with individuals, families, and groups; helping communities or groups provide or improve processes. The practice of Social Work requires knowledge of human development and behavior; of social, economic, and cultural institutions; and of the interactions of all these factors.

Wikipedia has more on standards: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_work

You have questions, I want to hear them. Doing my part to promote my profession and have people congratulate me instead of pity me.

And yes, I had a bad day too....

Weekend Update

2009-08-03T07:09:00.002-07:00

Every bone in my body hurts. We washed, taped, spackled and started to paint. It was a productive weekend. There is the expected "grass is greener" reaction from the boys regarding their respective rooms with keep out signs being made and fighting ensuing.

Things are going well, though. Only one room left for paint color decisions, and we consulted with a contractor regarding the major repairs.

Happy Homeowners

2009-07-28T06:53:00.002-07:00

Today is July 28th, 2009 and my last post was May 19th. There are lots of reasons for this, including getting sucked into the vortex that is Facebook.

Konal moving out was extremely hard on me emotionally, and it was not something I wanted to process in public, out of respect for him. He is doing well and starts high school in 2 weeks.

I turned 35 last week. That should be its own post, but the bulk of the day was spent dealing with this:

Welcome to your first look at Casa Chula. Papers were signed and money was paid on my birthday, and last night we got the keys. This is the start of much happiness and poverty for us. The street is Calle Chulo, which is where we got the name. Chulo/a means cute, but also means pimp in some dialects. Chris and I get a kick out of that.

We have a lot of work ahead of us until we can move, and because of some financing issues, we are going to have to do it in stages. When we walked in last night, there were puddles in the kitchen and in the bathroom from leaks.

Homeownership is such a strange journey. So much excitement, and so much worry. I have a litany of what ifs in my brain, and I fuss a lot about money and a budget. Our mortgage is low, but there are so many repairs to do.

In other news, years ago I promised Aidan that when we move out of Nana's house, he could have his own cat. Meet Isis, the kitten.

Isis was born on May 1st, and has been a lot of fun. I forgot how much kittens were like having babies around.

School starts Aug 3rd. Aidan is mad at me, because he has to start at Western Sky, then I am moving him to a charter school. The school in our new neighborhood sucks, and he is 3rd on the waiting list, so he will probably get in the charter school, but not until the week after school starts.

I will not be such a stranger. I totally blame Facebook, because it couldn't be my fault, now, could it?

Poor Arizona

2009-05-19T22:23:00.001-07:00

Perspectives

2009-05-14T18:07:00.002-07:00

As I rush through my daily life, it often is very beneficial to stop and considering things through another's perspective. This video should be required watching for anyone working with children, because you never know when you will be working with a child with this experience. One of the hardest things I have dealt with in my job is disrupted placements and adoptions.

h/t to Eyes Opened Wider

If you would like a transcript, there is one available here.

And I just keep running in circles

2009-05-12T08:32:00.002-07:00

I haven't posted much for a multitude of reasons. I want to post the details on the house, but am waiting until we close. This process has taken a ton of work and is going to be so totally worth it. We keep getting entangled in red tape, though. Apparently, the Realtors, Mortgage Brokers and Title Agencies are completely overextended with all the sales right now. Amazing how that happens. Lower the prices and people buy houses they can afford.

It looks like we are getting a lovely 1980's 4-bedroom brick home for $85,000. We are getting around $30000 in a 203k loan to renovate the place. Most of the issues are deferred maintenance and homeowner done repairs. I will not commit to anything or buy anything until we know the house is ours. The only thing I have bought was boxes for Konal to pack for his move to Dad's. I am going to start packing soon, but right now, I just want to get the house bought.

I am sick again. I hate having a lowered immune system. I am home today because I always get sicker the day after I start antibiotics. Even though I have bronchitis, I am also dealing with some gastric issues that are not letting me get far from a bathroom. I have a meeting at 10:30 that I am going to call into and a buttload of paperwork and billing I will work on this afternoon.

Aidan leaves for Math & Science camp tomorrow. He is very excited!

I finally joined Facebook after years of resistance. I'm scared. :)

A cat in a patch of sun

2009-05-11T13:18:00.001-07:00

DSC00009, originally uploaded by foole_of_hearts.

I went to a surprise birthday party after a weekend at Partners in Policymaking. Lo and behold, on a friends Flickr stream is this lovely photo. Yes, I am sound asleep in a patch of sunlight on a very comfy poof.

Life is good.

20/20- the whole segment

2009-05-08T06:42:00.000-07:00

Faces of Hope

2009-05-08T02:05:00.005-07:00

It is 2 am, and I am still up refining a presentation I am giving next week. I need to have the powerpoint ready for a planning meeting tomorrow. This presentation is one of the hardest for me. I am one of four parents telling their story at an agency. We have been asked to share the joys and the sorrows of our journey.

Because of this, I finally got off my duff and converted my old video tape of the ABC's 20/20 episode we were on in 2000. I was hoping to get a second chance when they contacted me last year and wanted to profile us as a successful family. That fell through- I guess successful doesn't sell.

In reviewing it, I found myself cringing over and over at the language used. It was so negative. I am still trying to load the clip up to Myspace, because they allow longer times, but in the meantime I can post the highly edited version here to show you what I mean.

From Videos

For that reason, I entitled my presentation "From Despair to Hope". I used my graduation video and the retrospective I recently put together to balance the presentation out, as well as to illustrate one fact: we have come such a very long way. My baby is growing up, and he is going to be just fine.

To Do List on the New House

2009-05-04T22:09:00.002-07:00

Forgive the disjointedness of this post. It was written as a line by line to my mortgage broker and was accompanied by scanned in estimates which would make it less confusing.

This is probably cheating, but on the other hand, it is all that is on my mind right now...

OK- Priority Repairs. The plumber did not give me individual estimates, but a total. I have the individuals when I can from shopping around at places like Lowe's. I included my "wishlist if we are able to fund them" items, but obviously, the priority repairs come first. Chris and I really want to be environmentally friendly (not to mention lowering our daily cost of living) so all the new installs are low-flo, eco systems wherever we can. I know I am forgetting something.... Let me know if you have trouble reading anything.

Roof- $6364

Insulation: R-40 $900

Wishlist: Active Attic Fan: $250

Solar Attic Fan: $450

Room by Room:

Garage:

Garage Door: $1500

Hot Water Heater: $800

Wishlist: Solar Water Heater $5000 before incentives ($325 after)

Water Softener (Priority, because all the faucets have to be replaced due to mineral deposits) $1000-$3000 for a high end system (I am thinking the $1200 range)

Kitchen:

New cabinets, minor electrical work, and new sink & faucet. See Hultzman estimate, although countertops will add another $600 according to him verbally. I have more estimates lined up, but not until after we close. I forgot to have them add in connecting the hood to the outside- Chris tends to make my smoke detectors go off.

Replace Garbage Disposal $100-$200, Dishwasher $400-$600, and stove $600-900. I pulled all the appliance costs from Lowe's.

New fan in dining room with light kit, plus electrical work (Ketring estimate + $70-$100 for fan)

Guest Bathroom:

Shower repair, new toilet, new cabinet/sink/faucet. Both Parker and Sons and Hultzman included this in their estimates. I forgot to have them estimate connecting the exhaust fan to the outside. It currently vents to the attic. That is on the priority list, though.

Master Bathroom

New shower (no way to repair the shower without removing surround, plus the glass doors are broken), new toilet and new faucet. Cabinet is fine.

Rest of house:

Repairing prior homeowner electrical issues with fan boxes in each room, plus installing new fans, including the outdoor fans.

Pulling out illegal propane hookup from Chimney (Estimate in Word Doc)

Fixing house water shut off valve in front of house.

Repairing hole in ceiling of family room. (Estimate including in Hultzman's)

Wishlist: Repairing unfinished closet in 4th bedroom

Wishlist: New flooring for 4th Bedroom.

Wishlist: Greywater system for watering landscaping: $3000

Wishlist: putting in closet system for Master Bedroom closet. No estimate on that yet.

So much to be done this summer. This doesn't include painting and moving and all that jazz.......

Nano!

2009-05-01T21:59:00.001-07:00

This warms the depths of my geeky heart. Nano technology explained for the masses.

The Nano Song from nanomonster on Vimeo.

No Flu!

2009-04-30T20:06:00.004-07:00

So, here in Maricopa county, three schools are being closed for 7 days due to the swine flu. My kids are worried, everyone is talking about it at work, and the internets are abuzz.

I have to help a family move tomorrow at work, then go to a candlelight vigil hosted by the Mental Health Awareness Coalition. The next day, I have a United Way event, then I need to create a presentation on what success in families looks like for a talk in 2 weeks. I also need to create the curriculm for a class I run. The topic this month is utility resources.

How is all this tied together. I am sitting here with a sore throat, stiff neck, and rapidly filling up nose, not to mention this awful headache that has created momzilla all evening.

Both the boys are complaining they don't feel well, as well. I doubt it is the swine flu, but even if it is, I am sunk. I have no paid time off.

To think I can't pursue the management job in Flagstaff someone recommended me for today. Sometimes, my life is too complicated.

Aidan's Surgery

2009-04-28T10:53:00.003-07:00

After successfully dodging my civic duty yesterday (actually, I was willing, but the timing was wrong) Aidan had his surgery this morning.

It happened, which was a miracle, since Aidan was trying his best to make it not happen. I am a bit zombie today. So is he.

Now for the healing and to get back to work.

Time after time

2009-04-26T20:28:00.002-07:00

I have mentioned it before. Konal is moving in with his dad on May 22 (the last day of school). All of the arrangements are almost done. He is enrolled in high school there. His primary care physcian has been changed. I still have some details to take care of, but I delivered the notarized letter changing physical custody last week.

It sounds like he is moving far away, but it is only 20 miles. On the inside, I feel the distance getting farther and farther away. Konal is handling this like most kids, feeling that he needs to push me away in order to be closer to his dad. Intellectually I understand this, but emotionally my heart is breaking into itty bitty pieces. If you listen closely, you can hear it.

I think all we have been through together makes it harder. Holding him while he tries to hide from the hallucinations. Keeping him safe through the rages. Celebrating the victories and growth. Being there for him. So many Dr's appointments. So many moments of sadness and of joy.

I know this is a process all parents go through. I will get through this, and there is even a part of me that is looking forward to the break. I was even the one who suggested the move, noticing how much Konal was craving time with his Dad. I am still crying on the inside. I am scared. I am worried that it won't work. I am mourning the loss of control.

Meanwhile, I will be there to support his Dad and him during the transition. This couldn't have happened even a year ago- there was too much instability on both sides. Things are by no means easy still, but they are much, much better. I am not truly losing my little boy by any means. He is just moving on to another phase of life. And if it doesn't work out, I will be here...

Finally posting

2009-04-25T13:47:00.003-07:00

The Spring Fling we hosted at EMPACT is over and much fun was had by all. I hate running events, because they consume every waking moment of your time. It was, however, a successful event which did what we set out to do- providing a chance for the families we serve to find community with each other.

I love it when we have events where staff's families get to mingle with the families we serve. I feel that it decreases the power differential and reminds both sides that in the end we are all just people dealing with the challenges life sends our way. I am much more sensitive on what it feels like to be on the other side of the glass partition because of our family's experiences. Any thing that can reduce that feeling of us vs. them is worth pursuing.

In other news, we are still in process of buying the house. Our offer of 85K was accepted, and now we are securing the mortgage and renovation loan. We have all the estimates in for the roof, re-doing the kitchen and bathrooms, the landscaping, the electrical work and the new hot water heater. We are also installing more insulation and an alarm system, as well as maintenance on the AC and fireplace.

It is only a mile away from where we are now. The schools suck, but I have Aidan on the waiting list for an arts academy about 5 miles away. I can always leave Aidan enrolled in his current schools.

We have to have the funding secured by May 11th and we close on May 25th. I am finding that buying a house is a lot like having a baby- everyone tells you their horror stories. I wasn't worried about the mortgage until everyone started sharing their stories. Oi!

Speaking of Aidan, he has surgery on Tuesday. It is minor surgery- ingrown toenail removal- but he is a bit scared of medical procedures (he completely flips out, actually). He wouldn't let the podiatrist do it in his office, so we have to admit him in the hospital and knock the boy out.

Monday I have jury duty. As a social worker, I have never been picked for a jury, but it is still a hassle. I am also still doing hand therapy twice a week. Everytime I tell the therapist he has to have my hand ready for painting in 2 months, he shakes his head and sighs. I told him off the first visit because he said "interesting" way too many times. In my experience, interesting is not a good word when said in conjuction with medical issues.

And that, in a nutshell, is why I have not been posting. I will try harder. Tomorrow, Konal's move...

What does he think of me?

2009-04-08T19:55:00.003-07:00

Stolen from Mom-NOS. I interviewed Aidan, who is now 11 and typed in his responses directly. My prompts are in parantheses. Here is mom in the eyes of the boy.

1. What is something mom always says to you?

"Be Quiet." Wait... "Settle Down"

2. What makes mom happy?

Long Pause... "Uh, a Clean House"

3. What makes mom sad?

"I don't know?"

4. How does your mom make you laugh?

um, um, um.. "I don't know"

5. What was your mom like as a child?

"Nerdy"

6. How old is your mom?

"3..... 35? I think I am a year off. Well, I don't really know because people always tell me that if you ask a parent their age it is rude. Mom, what is your age?"

7. How tall is your mom?

5'6"

8. What is her favorite thing to do?

"Help people"

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?

"You go out with Chris and you go on your computer a lot"

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?

"Famous Social Worker"

11. What is your mom really good at?

"Sitting"

12. What is your mom not very good at?

"Singing"

13. What does your mom do for her job?

"She is a social worker for EMPACT Suicide Prevention Center Family Division" (I am impressed....)

14. What is your mom's favorite food?

"Healthy Stuff" (Like?) "Broccoli and Asparagus. Wait! Summer Rolls"

15. What makes you proud of your mom?

"You help lots and lots and lots and lots of people"

16. If your mom were a character in a book, who would she be?

"The nerdy social worker" (In what book?) "Realistic Fiction"

17. What do you and your mom do together?

"Sit around" "Oh, Oh, I know! Watch Dr. Who!"

18. How are you and your mom the same?

"We both like Dr. Who." "We both LOVE Dr. Who"

19. How are you and your mom different?

"Um, there's not much"

20. How do you know your mom loves you?

"She says so. Things like you're awesome and stuff like that"

21. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?

"Her Chair." (My Chair?) "You seem to enjoy relaxing in it"

Let me make you an offer

2009-04-05T20:17:00.001-07:00

After much looking and talking and filling out of papers today, we made offers on two houses. Now we wait. This waiting will not be uneventful. I am stressed out and need more air in my lungs. I didn't realize just how much all this would freak me out.

Az Advocacy Call

2009-04-04T09:20:00.002-07:00

There is a current grassroots effort to send an empty envelope on April 10th to the governor and your legislators. On the back of the envelope print or write this:

"This envelope represents one infant, child or adult with disabilities whose life will be critically impacted by budget cuts. This envelope is empty because it represents what the lives of people who are vulnerable will be like without the support they need to live with dignity and respect. It also represents the emptiness that our communities will experience without the inclusion of people with disabilities. Sad... lonely... empty. Is anyone listening?"

http://www.azleg.gov/alisStaticPages/HowToContactMember.asp

Please pass this on.

All I can say is that my life is pretty plain

2009-03-31T06:01:00.002-07:00

Attention Universe! When did I become a grown-up?

We have the pre-qual on the mortgage, and there have been no other bids on the house. We go see it Sunday. Things are moving quickly. So much work ahead. I haven't had a good nights sleep in a week and I am not eating.

The kids are excited. I told them paint is relatively inexpensive and they can paint their rooms anyway they want. They are both making plans for extravagant rooms that I am sure will be parentally modified. Aidan's involves all black and black light reactive paint on the ceiling. Konal's involves primary colors on each wall.

The financial situation up ahead is going to be interesting. My paycheck will be responsible for the mortgage and Chris' will be for everything else. I have a high debt load, and I am seriously thinking of going in for financial counseling after we get the mortgage secured.

The house we are planning on putting the offer in is a bit run down in an upper lower class neighborhood. There is a lot of diversity on the block, but honestly, I think we are adding white to that mix, which is awesome. We are doing a looking run on Sunday, and are including 3 other houses for sale in the same small development. The best part is it is only 2 miles from mom, off of Van Buren and Dysart. We really want this one- we like it. Patience is a virtue, I know.

We are trying for a Homepath Renovation mortgage. We would like to get 15,000 above the cost of the house. It needs energy efficiency upgrades and was built in the early 80's. It needs landscaping, new lights and fans, and there is an unfinished 4th bedroom. We want to put in low flow toilets and showers, an energy efficient water heater (tankless if we can work it in the budget), solar panels, solar screens. Not to mention the basics of moving in- stove, washer/dryer, window treatments, bathroom accessories. Anna's Linens will be my friend. We already have 2 refrigerators and lots of furniture. Mom is also letting me buy her car from her. She uses it about 1-2 times a week, and we are close enough that it can continue that way. The house we are looking at does not need floors- woot! It has pretty 16x16 tile floors, and two bedrooms with carpeting. A scooba is on my wishlist.

The good news is because of our current living situations, we have stability to do the renovations before we move in. Our goal is a mortgage payment low enough to pay on unemployment, since Chris and I work in vulnerable jobs. Also, as you can see from the renovation list, to keep our daily living costs as low as possible. There is no HOA, so we have some yard freedom. We have a great Realtor, and she keeps in touch and lets us know what we need to do next.

I will let everyone know the details and show pictures soon. I am sure Chris will take pictures when we are officially shown the house.

Real Estate Blues

2009-03-27T06:41:00.002-07:00

I contacted a Realtor last night.

That is terrifying for me. It is a committment to the process that I am not sure I am ready for. I know we are going for modest. I know the goal is a mortgage that can be paid on unemployment. It is time. I know all these things. I am still not ready for the process and emotions that are involved in shopping for homes.

Our criteria is simple: A 4 bedroom home within about a 3 mile radius of my current house for under 100k. A year ago that would have been impossible. Now, it seems to be easy. I look at the listings and there are pages of 80k listings.

A big thank you to my future mother-in-law and family. Your commitment to help us with this and give us the backup we need is what makes this possible. I am looking forward to finally living with my love as a complete family and having a place that is ours.

Sometimes it isn't worth the pain

2009-03-15T12:06:00.002-07:00

So, the Carpal Tunnel Release was successful. There is no more numbness in my hand. I would be excited about this news, but in trade I got more pain than I had before. I start hand therapy next week, which might help the fact that my hand is continually swollen and I am in a lot of pain. I am losing my fine motor skills, including the ability to write, open bottles, and carry things. I drop things. I drop things constantly.

I am scared. I need my hands. I need to be able to type and to manipulate a mouse. I know I can adapt, but I need to work and make money to support my children. Chris and I have plans that I am not willing to put on hold, including buying a house, having a child, getting married, that depend on my working as well as being healthy.

We will survive, and we will do it in still. I am just in a lot of pain as I push myself to do what is needed to be done. One day at a time is my mantra.

Important Human Rights Video

2009-03-14T20:16:00.001-07:00

Please watch. Produced for International Woman's Day 2009.