KuCity

Celebrity Gossip by Akishah

2010-07-18T06:31:00.001-07:00

Amani produces a movie
The singer Amani has morphed into the movie industry. Her first appearance was in the movie “Wamba”. This film takes place in the 1990and follows Wamba and a group of his friends who live in California- a suburban in the city of Nairobi. Having to deal with the frustration of the unknown deadly disease of AIDS, the whole community is worried and are left to wonder what spell had befallen on them. He starts to sell old used books for survival and his friends also lend a helping hand…. Get a copy of this movie and trust me utaipenda.

Mercy Myra is back.
The Kenyan singer is said to be making her long return into the music industry after being in the United States for the last couple of years. She’s said to be performing in Minneapolis with a 8 piece band. Other artists who will be joining her include the Ugandan singer Roy Kapale and Tanzanian songstress Erica Lulakwa.

THE AWAITED BET AWARDS
It went down some time last month that the presentation of the awards took place. This year’s host was the beautiful Queen Latifah. The main perfoemers of this year included Kanye West, Usher, T.I., Eminem, Chris Brown, Alicia Keys, B.o.B(ft Keyshia Cole), T-Pain, Monica(with Deniece Williams), Drake, Young Jeezy, Diddy-Dirty Money(ft Rick Ross and Nicki Minaj) DJ Khaled(ft Busta Rhymes) Ttey Songz. The artist that has performed most times is Beyonce.

Award categories

BET Nominees and winners

Female Male

Best R&B artists: Alicia keys Trey Songz

Beyonce Chris Brown

Mary J Blige Maxwell

Melanie Fiona Raheem DeVaughn

Usher

Best Hop-hop artists: Nicki minaj Drake Ester dean B.o.B

Lil kim Fabulous

Rasheeda Fay-z

Trina Ludacris

Best Gospel artist: Mervin sapp

Tamela mann

Vickie winans

Best group artist: Young money

Black eyed peas

Clipse

Dirty money

New boyz

Best collaboration: Jay-z ft Alicia keys “empire state of mind”

Beyonce ft lady gaga “video phone”

Drake ft trey songz “successful”

Drake lil wayne kanye eminem “forever”

Trey songz ft fabulous “say aah”

Best video of the year: Beyonce ft lady gaga “video phone”

Jay-z ft rihanna kanye “run this town”

Jay-z ft Alicia keys “empire state of mind”

Viewer’s choice: Rihanna ft young jeezy “hard”

Beyonce “sweet dreams

Monica “everything to me”

Trey songz ft fabulous “say aah”

Young money ft Lloyd “bedrock”

Bet Centric award: Monice

Maxwell

Sade

Melanie Fiona

Chrisette Michele

Actors of the year: Queen latifah

Justin bieber

Zoe saldana

Athlete of the year: none listed

Lifetime achievement award: Prince

BET humanitarian award: John legend.

Its said that the famous hip-hop and r&b artists jay-z beyonce and rihanna did not attend the BET Award ceremony because the r&b artist Chris Brown was performing at the event. What childish behaviour are these celebs trying to portray????????

It has also come to our notice that the r&b artist Beyonce had a secret affair with the rap artist Justin Timberlake. She revealed this in an interview and also said that he is a great kisser. Wooooooooooooooooo!!!!!! Hope you chix ain waiting for a kiss from the charming man, he ain gon kiss you but you know, things happen.
What more are we expecting from our celebs????????

A stanza of one of ma poems:

Its in your arms I find comfort

In your embrace I find love

In your smile I find life

Cant explain these

Because with your words

Glorious melodies do I heart

That make me feel you near

and want to squeeze you tighter

and not think of the future,,…

by Akishah

The Music Industry, by Akishah

2010-07-06T00:44:00.000-07:00

Wedding Bells

On Monday 28^th June 2010, Talia Oyando tied the knot with Ezekiel Onyango at the Attorney generals chambers but plans to do it formally are still on. Only a few people attended the ceremony. We wish the couple all the best!

Bongo kashikana Na Genge: Jua Kali’s 1^st bongo collabo

The king of Genge crossed the border to dares salaam to do a collabo with Bwana Misosi famed for the tracks ‘heshima nitoke vipio’, mabinti wa kitanga’ and ‘heshima’ ft Redsan.The new song goes by the name ‘huezi jua’ ft jua Kali.The song was recorded at the Fisharab Records and was produced by Lamar. This is what we mean by East Africa Community integration.

Own a part of Namless!

His wardrobe at least….we all know who owns him. Guys were to bid for Nameless’s glasses, I mean sunglasses, at the music for hemophiliacs second annual fundraising dinner held on 26^th June at the Carnivore grounds for a whooping ksh.15000 as the starting bid price. His durag was set to begin at ksh.5000.OMG! Can’t wait to see his new look. You had better look good to rock ma world (plus the chic fans).Point of note though, the sunglasses were bought for ksh.60000, Yes most of our salaries, not monthly but several months. What the…..!!???

Deceptions: A true Kenyan soap opera revelation

It came as a rude shock that our very own prominent artist, Nazizi: 1st lady of Kenyan rap, has been married for the past 2years!!More surprise are in store as it is rumored that early last month (June), the singer delivered a bouncing baby boy who was named Kamar .Jesus Christ! Who saw this coming??Anywho congratulations to mama Kamar!

In related news, she hinted that a single by Necessary Noise is going to be released in the near future.

Karma (Eunice Kamau) wedded

It seems like the perfect season/year to get married if you’re a Kenyan female celebrity especially a singer. The bootylicious and highly talented singer Karma famed for the hit collabo ’Tatizo’ got married to a Mr. Francis waruhati much to the disappointment of all her male fans and admirers. The wedding took place at NPC woodly while the reception was held at the Nairobi chapel grounds. All young men who had eyes for her will now have to forever hold their peace.We wish the newlyweds all the best and hope to hear some new songs from the singer.

THE INTERNATIONAL SCENE

Gramps Morgan Live in concert at the Carnivore!

Gramps Morgan of Morgan Heritage is set to visit Kenya soon, actually on 10^th July 2010 at the renowned Carnivore grounds. He will be featuring his band at the charity show organized by Hands across Kenya and the dohty family. Sources have confirmed that he will be arriving on 8^th June 2010.

The East African Connection

Sometime ago when Sean Kingston was in Africa, he claimed to have admired AY’s work and he said that he would like to work with him. AY has further confirmed that they will be doing a collabo with Kingstone in the near future.Way to go AY!

Is Ray C an energizing drink?

Tanzanian singer Ray C is going to be the new face of a Kenyan energy drink which will be launched soon. She revealed this during one of her performances’ am all for the EAC spirit but the question is, couldn’t the makers not find a Kenyan female singer to promote the Kenyan drink to a Kenyan market.(Hope they are getting the drift here).Tough luck for the energy drink company but good bargain for Ray C,she will be smiling all the way to the bank.

MUSIC TALENT IN KIMATHI

Wassup guys? It’s been disturbing me how Kimathi University has lacked ways in which it can nurture people’s talents. I know many people can sing, dance or involve themselves in different activities that concern arts especially music like deejaying.

We should take the initiative of coming up with ways in which we could improve on our talents. I personally would encourage people to come together, talk on ways we can change’ Kimathi music industry’ (hope it will come into existence soon).I know there is no single person who doesn’t like money, and through music there can be cash inflow and I have witnessed it. People come from scratch and have made it for themselves through music.

It’s time we took or stand and decided on what our future will be in our music industry not only in Kenya but also internationally. Let’s start with the little we can and I know we’ll go far with all our efforts put together.

Never lie to kidsNever lie to kids by Victor Tadoh Chege Oluoch

2010-07-02T07:13:00.000-07:00

There was this guy sunbathing in the nude at the beach. Well, this little girl comes up to him, so he covers his private parts with a newspaper.

The little girl says, 'What's under there?'

So the man answers, 'A bird.'

The girl goes away and the man falls asleep. When he wakes up, he is in a hospital and in great pain.

A doctor comes up to his bed and asks, 'What happened?'

The man answers, 'I don't know. I was at the beach and I fell asleep after talking to a little girl.'

So the doctor tells this to the Police, and they go to the beach to find any witnesses.

When they get there, they saw the little girl the man was talking about. So they ask her if she did anything to the man.

She answers, ' I didn't do anything to the man, but while he was sleeping, I played with his bird. After a while, it spit at me, so I broke its neck, burned its nest, and smashed all its eggs.

A message to Roy Hodgson. You poor, poor man by Victor Tadoh Chege Oluoch

2010-07-02T06:59:00.000-07:00

'I'm actually delighted that Liverpool have appointed Roy Hodgson, and I actually have a bit of advice for him. "Sell, sell, sell!!" I have been of the belief for quite a few months now that the only way that Liverpool are going to be able to rebuild a top 4 team without massive investment from a rich investor is to sell Torres and Gerrard'

'I for one welcome this brave new era of players playing in position, as well as possibly improving at the club.'

'I think he's going to be a benign presence, an old wise head, like Del Bosque has been for Real and for Spain, who'll get Liverpool playing decent football and instill some team spirit'

'Mark Manning seems to think that England are just like Spurs. A top eight team that reaches quarter finals. Well, it was top four last season and a cup semi-final, but don't let that ruin the comparison, will you'

NYS vs Kimathi University (The Titans) Match Report by Simon Mwangi

2010-07-01T09:49:00.000-07:00

Overview
Date: June 20, 2010
Time: 12PM (GMT+3)
Venue: City Park Stadium.
Possession: NYS40-60 The Titans

Half-time scores: NYS 0-4 The Titans

Full Time Scores: NYS 0-9 The Titans

Match Report

It was a high score game after the Titans demolished NYS with a 9-0 defeat. The titans drew first blood in the 4th minute when Chris Mchwanju found the back of the net past the NYS goalkeeper, Simon Maina. Fredrick Nyaga dribbled past two defenders to hand Simon Mwangi a giftedpass to make it 2-0 in the 14th minute. In the 29thminute, another superb goal came from Austin Anyangu, who just came on for Simon Mwangi to drive in the powerful shot at goal. One minute later, Chris added his second goal to make it 4-0 at the half time break.

Just 2 minutes into the second half, The Titans had a break to make the score 5-0 after Simon Mwangi completed a counter attack. All hellbroke loose for the Titans as NYS came blazing, firing towards the Titans goalbut failed to convert the attacks into goals. Brian Ahenda cut through the NYSdefence, and startled Simon Maina with a powerful shot at goal to make it 6-0.The NYS had various attempts on goal which kept the Titans defence on toes.Musyoka gave the Titans defence a headache with his dribbles and good stickwork. It was a good day for Chris as he got his hat trick with an outstandinggoal from zero angle. Dancun Mutumas cored the seventh goal as Joseph Nga’ng’a wrapped it up after scoring a goalfrom a penalty stroke.

Mombasa Sports Club vs Kimathi University (The Titans) Match Report by Simon Mwangi

2010-07-01T09:39:00.001-07:00

Mombasa Sports Club vs Kimathi University (The Titans) Match Report Date: June 27, 2010 Time: 10 AM (GMT+3) Venue: City Park Stadium, Nairobi MSC Squad: 13 Amos Wanjala 17 Charles Kambona (cpt) 2 Edwin Mahanga 3 Calvince Odhianbo 9 George Otieno 10 Jared Omwel 14 Ronald Kelel 7 Brian Karimi Kibera 5 Fredrick Juma 8 Titus Stephen 1 Euya Buteyo (GK) 16 Bob Festus Mavaka 15 Charles Munyasya The Titans Squad: 12 Brian Ahenda 23 Chris Mchwanju 20 AustinAnyangu 17 Daniel Waweru 4 Francis Nyaga 9 Dennis Rama 10 Fredrick Nyaga (cpt) (Yellow 1’;) 1 David Mathenge (GK) 21 Joseph Ng’ang’a 18 Kihoro Wambugu 13 Misheck Ngunjiri (Yellow 27’;) 26 Mutuma Duncan 19 Brian Alumasa 15 Philip Omoit 16 Simon Mwangi 14 Stanley Njenga Umpires: Rajkaran Giddie Indergit Matharu Judges: AS. Jawdu Possession: MSC 50-50 The Titans Half-time scores: MSC 1-1 The Titans Full Time Scores: MSC 1-2 The Titans It was a tough game as The Titans locked horns with an equally matched MSC side. The possession was all a draw for the whole game. The scoring begun at the 13th minute interval, with Simon Mwangi picking a loose ball and driving it to the board with a hard push. MSC equalized 13 minutes later through a penalty stroke scored by Titus Stephen. The second half saw both teams miss many chances to seal the game and declare a defeat. David Mathenge , the Titans Goalkeeper, made some wonderful saves which made him the man of the match. Chris Mchwanju scored the second goal for the Titans to make it a 1-2 win over MSC.

The Mind of a (WO)man by Victor Tadoh Chege Oluoch's

2010-06-30T09:40:00.000-07:00

Let's say a guy named Mwangi is attracted to a woman
named Njambi. He asks her out to a movie, she accepts; they have a

pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and

again they enjoy themselves.

They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither

one of them is seeing anybody else.

And then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to

Njambi, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud, "Do you

realise that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly

six months?"

And then there is silence in the car. To Njambi, it seems like a very

loud silence. She thinks to herself, "Ngai! I wonder if it bothers him

that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our

relationship;maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of

obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of."

And Mwangi is thinking, "Ngoma! Six months!"

And Njambi is thinking, "But, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of

relationship, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so

I'd have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going

the way we are, moving steadily toward...I mean, where are we going?

Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of

intimacy?Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a

lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?"

And Mwangi is thinking, "...so that means it was...let's

see...February when we started going out, which was right after I had

the car at the garage, which means...let me check the odometer...Whoa!

I am way overdue for an oil change here."

And Njambi is thinking, "He's upset. I can see it on his face.

Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our

relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has

sensed...even before I sensed it...that I was feeling some

reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to

say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected."

And Mwangi is thinking, "And I'm going to have them look at the clutch

again. I don't care what those Nugus say, it's still not engaging right.

And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time.

What cold weather? It's 30 degrees outside, and this thing is shifting

like a chokora garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves 12,000 bob!"

And Njambi is thinking, "He's angry. And I don't blame him. I'd be

angry, too. Ngai! I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I

can't help the way I feel. I'm just not sure."

And Mwangi is thinking, "They'll probably say it's only a 90-day

warranty. That's exactly what they're going to say, the nyangaus."

And Njambi is thinking, "Maybe I'm just too idealistic, waiting for a

knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right

next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person

I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A

person who is in pain because of my self-centred, schoolgirl romantic fantasy."

And Mwangi is thinking, "Warranty? They want a warranty I'll give them

a bloody warranty. I'll take their warranty and stick it right up their..."

"Mwangi," Njambi says aloud.

"What?" asks Mwangi, startled.

"Please don't torture yourself like this," she says, her eyes

beginning to brim with tears. "Maybe I should never have...Ngai, I

feel so..." She breaks down, sobbing.

"What?" says Mwangi.

"I'm such a fool," Njambi sobs. "I mean, I know there's no knight. I

really know that. It's silly. There's no knight, and there's no horse."

"There's no horse?" says Mwangi.

"You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Njambi says.

"No!" says Mwangi, glad to finally know the correct answer.

"It's just that...It's that I...I need some time," Njambi says.

There is a 15-second pause while Mwangi, thinking as fast as he can,

tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one

that he thinks might work.

"Yes," he says.

Njambi, deeply moved, touches his hand. "Oh, Mwangi, do you really

feel that way?" she says.

"What way?" says Mwangi.

"That way about time," says Njambi.

"Oh," says Mwangi. "Yes."

Njambi turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him

to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it

involves a horse.

At last she speaks. "Thank you, Mwangi," she says.

"Thank you," says Mwangi.

Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted,

tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Mwangi gets back to

his place,he opens a bag of crisps, turns on the TV, and immediately

becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two

Czechoslovakians he never heard of ,as he awaits the big match of the day between MAN-U and ARSENAL. A tiny voice in the far recesses

of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in

the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever

understand what, and so he figuresit's better if he doesn't think

about it... (This is also Mwangi's policy regarding world hunger)

The next day Njambi will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of

them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours.

In painstaking detail, they will analyse everything she said and

everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every

word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering

every possible ramification. They will continue to discuss this

subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any

definite conclusions,but never getting bored with it, either.

Meanwhile, Mwangi, while playing squash one day with a mutual friend

of his and Njambi's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say,

"Kamau, did Njambi ever own a horse??"

A cow from Murang'a by Victor Tadoh Chege Oluoch's

2010-06-30T09:36:00.000-07:00

The only Cow in Machakos Town stopped giving milk.

The people did some research and found that they could buy a Cow just like that from Muranga at Kshs 20,000.00. They bought the Cow from Muranga and the Cow was wonderful. It produced lots of milk all of the time, and the people were very happy.

They decided to acquire a Bull to mate with the Cow to produce more Cows like it. They would never have to worry about their milk supply again. They bought the Bull and put it in the pasture with their beloved Cow.

However, whenever the Bull tried to mount the Cow, the Cow would move away. No matter what approach the Bull tried, the Cow would move away from the Bull and he could not succeed in his quest. The people were very upset and decided to ask the Veterinary Officer, who was very wise, what to do.

They told the Vet what was happening. 'Whenever the Bull tires to mount our Cow, she moves away. If he approaches from the back, she moves forward. When he approaches her from the front, she backs off. An attempt from the side, she walks away to the other side.' The Vet thought about this for a minute and asked, 'Did you by chance, buy this
Cow from Muranga?'' The people were dumbfounded, since no one had ever mentioned where they bought the Cow. ' You are truly a wise Vet,' they said. 'How did you know we got the Cow from Muranga?'

The Vet replied with a distant look in his eye, 'My wife is from Muranga'

KINUTHIA by Victor Tadoh Chege Oluoch

2010-06-30T09:18:00.000-07:00

Kinuthia works hard at the office and spends most evenings playing pool at
Kachoi (choices). His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his
birthday she takes him to a local strip club (Chillers).

The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Kinuthia! Vipi bwana?"
His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.
"Ziiiii," says Kinuthia. "He's in my pool team."

When they are seated, a waitress asks Kinuthia if he'd like his usual and
brings over a cold Tusker.
His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, "How did she
know that you drink Tusker?"
"She's in the Ladies' Pool League, honey. We share tables with them."

A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around
Kinuthia, starts to rub herself all over him and says
"Sasa Kinush. Want your usual table dance, big boy?"
Kinuthia's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Kinuthia follows and spots her getting into a cab.
Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.
He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him
for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.
She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every cuss
word in the book.
The cabby turns around and says, "Ngai Kinuthia, you picked up a real
bitch this time".

The Wife FAINTS!!

KIMATHI UNIVERSITY COLLEGE OF TECHNOLOGY

2010-06-20T09:06:00.000-07:00

As a student of a university that boasts of teaching technological advancement,our motto being 'better life through technology' I have taken it upon myself together with a team of other prolific writers from the university to try and provide insight on what goes on in what will one day be Africa's and eventually the worlds premier university.We will try and demystify the rumors that are ever so rampant in our campus as well as educate prospective applicants about Kimathi University a.k.a 'KuCity' from a students point of view as well as inform those currently enrolled on whats happening in and around campus.we shall also be posting individual articles of any one who is interested in participating.Guys will also have pieces on lifestyle,fond highskul memories,what happens at home,gaming,ICT,business as well as rumbling about life in KuCity.Hope you all enjoy reading our articles!