Kuroizero :: UnderNet

Twilight

2010-07-15T13:10:00.001-05:00

Hola, soy un inmortal mágico de 100 años perfecto de cuerpo y alma. Creo que voy a enamorar a una pelada de preuniversitario con la inteligencia emocional de un adoquín.
Me voy a hacer el batracio y le voy a enseñar mis pectorales para que se imagine mis partes íntimas, que por cierto también brillan con en el sol, para luego darle la estocada final con mi sexy labia de mimo. Mi ñaña me dijo que vamos a casarnos, asi que ya no creo en las relaciones premaritales que tuve los 117 años de los que no me preguntó nunca con quien estuve.

Ah si! Ese es Jacob mi pana del futuro. Es bonito, le gusta ladrar cada cinco minutos mientras morbosean sus abdominales. Desgraciadamente, se va a morir soltero porque es un super perro. Tranqui, después se hace pana de nuestra hija. Creo que la llamaré como algún personaje de los muppets!

Voy a prometerle amor con cierto grado de confianza, como nunca ha imaginado el amor en praderas de unicornios y escucharé todas y cada una de sus conversaciones. Pero ahorita no, en el libro que viene. Ahorita dejaré que se ponga queso cheddar y le paro el carro.

Un besito,
Edward Cullen. También conocido el preservativo humano, Jesús, o Chuck Norris.

WTSHTF

2010-01-14T20:19:00.003-05:00

Misc resources for when the shit hits the fan.
Recommended read: EMERGENCY, by Neil Strauss

http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/feed/

TREVOR BLAKE: THE STORY OF THE FIRST CHRISTMAS

2009-12-25T15:38:00.000-05:00

In the beginning God made man all messed up and prone to do bad things, which got God mad. So God cursed man and even killed everybody except one family in a flood. God was still mad but later said okay man here’s a second chance. God sent God to man as a sacrifice to God, which pleased God so it was all good. Christmas is that story.

Jesus Christ was the 28th or 43rd decendent of David. Those two numbers are pretty close. The important part is that Jesus was a decendent of David because not one or two but three prophecies demand it. But if there are one or two verses that say Mary was instead from the house of Levi then lighten up, okay? Listen. His parents Mary and Joseph were in Bethlehem, they were already there because that was their home town. Unless it was Nazareth. Yeah, Nazareth, maybe. One of those two. Either way, they went from Bethlehem to Egypt to Nazareth. Or maybe from Nazareth to Bethlehem to Jerusalem to Nazareth. Don’t get too hung up in the details, it’s not like the Bible is supposed to be perfect or anything. Jesus had to be born in Bethlehem because that’s what the prophecy says. Or almost says. Close enough. And He had to be coming back from Egypt from somewhere (unless He wasn’t) because there wasthis other prophecy that said so, or at least had some of the same words in the sentence. You have to grant me that. Galilee, that’s for sure where He was born. As to what really happened at Jesus’ birth maybe only His mother knew.

Just put all that to the side for a second. What matters, what really matters is that Jesus was born to be the messiah. Galilee is for sure where He was born, so just ignore that part where it says that can’t be true no matter how strongly it says so. Jesus was God made flesh, which God said– twice – He would never do, and God never lies, so that’s a miracle right there. Jesus was full of miracles. He said there would be only one ‘kind’ of Christian, not thousands of denominations. Jesus said He wouldn’t give anysigns, then He did – hey! He’s God, He can do that. You can’t do that, can you smart guy? Jesus came to save everybody, or maybe just some people. You never know so you gotta be good, He’s more powerful than Santa like that. Jesus said He’d always be with us or maybe not. Jesusalways followed the law, except about what He could eat, washing Hishands, the Sabbath, fasting, adultery, divorce, lying and stealing. Jesus even knew He’d be beheaded just like John the Baptist but Jesus used time travel powers and got crucified instead.

Okay you’re trying to use logic and science and stuff, big bang, you think you’re a monkey or something. Well this monkey has his mind open enough to believe that Jesus came back from the dead, which is the slam-dunk evidence He was the real deal. When the women went to Jesus’ tomb it was open. Or closed. He had all this holy powers on Him, so you couldn’t touch Him or you could but it’d be like wow. Jesus stayed on Earth for one day or eight days or forty-plus days or something, plenty of time for thousands of people to see him. That’s how we know He rose up into the sky from the Mount of Olives. Jerusalem. Bethany. Whatever, they saw it happen. There’s really good evidence for Jesus.

Merry Christmas!

Source

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-14T03:03:00.002-05:00

I'll be partying for the next few weeks so, Merry Christmas in Advance!

Edit - No charcoal yet? well there's always room for improvement :)

Yield and overcome - Tao 22

2009-11-27T09:20:00.002-05:00

Yield and overcome;
Bend and be straight;
Empty and be full;
Wear out and be new;
Have little and gain;
Have much and be confused.

Therefore the wise embrace the one
And set an example to all.
Not putting on a display,
They shine forth.
Not justifying themselves,
They are distinguished.
Not boasting,
They receive recognition.
Not bragging,
They never falter.
They do not quarrel,
So no one quarrels with them.
Therefore the ancients say, "Yield and overcome."
Is that an empty saying?
Be really whole,
And all things will come to you.

LONGPOST >> "If i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby" >>

2009-11-24T02:45:00.007-05:00

I, the author of this blog, hold no grudge towards the Twilight saga.
I know the movie expects you to read the book before you watch it. I know it’s not a real vampire movie, it’s just something light and safe full of anticipation for post marital sex with Underworld meets Disney prince characters covered in glitter.
BUT.
I do oppose this teenage girl porn trend. Specially when it spawns walmart sections that have items like these on sale:

"Do I dazzle you?"

I foresee a hate wave to start spamming the comments any time now, just like with the cosplay post.

--

10 Reasons why I hate Twilight
We focus our dislike of the fur and fang saga.
BY IANN ROBINSON
NOV 23, 2009

I had started this weekend with a much brighter outlook on humanity than I ended up with. Why you ask? Well, lots of reasons but one of them was the fact that New Moon (the latest Twilight movie) made two hundred and fifty eight million dollars worldwide.

I will repeat that.

New Moon made two hundred and fifty eight million dollars worldwide this weekend……the mind reels.

These are movies based on novels that are a stone’s throw away from being coloring books and yet people flock to them like the second coming. What did I miss? Is it really so compelling watching the sad Vampire do battle with the jock werewolf over a girl who does little more than mumble and complain? Apparently it is, apparently if you can re-write the masturbation material of a tween girls diary then you can be considered an “author” much like Stephanie Meyer is.

For all those who are about to hand me the “They aren’t written for you” excuse you can save it. The Last Apprentice books by Joseph Delany weren’t written for me and neither were the extremely well written Harry Potter books. Just because it isn’t written specifically for my age group doesn’t mean I can’t tell how bad the Twilight books are. These movie versions are little more than extended music videos were the kids from “Impossibly Attractive High” pout and whine over their lives. The only difference is we’re dealing with Vampires and Werewolves instead of the “rebel” kids taking on the football players in the parking lot.

Being a man who over analyzes everything I decided to try and focus my unending rage at the Twilight saga both film and written versions. It’s not that I’m jealous of Stephanie Meyers’ success because I never published a novel, not at all. I know that because I’m busy being way jealous of other authors much more talented than she is. It’s also not that I care how good looking the cast is, though I do find it silly that to be supernatural you have to be an underwear model but I digress. Why did I hate these movies so much? I harnessed my hatred and came up with ten reasons.

10. The Depth Of A Cereal Bowl

I only read two of the Twilight books and I had to stop because nothing was going on that interested me at all. It wasn’t that I wanted more action I just wanted to care at all on any level about these characters. These books never go below the surface level of anything involved with them. Main character Bella and Edward (the Vampire) for all their endless love don’t invest much more feeling into what they’re doing than the average high school couple.

Bella spends most of her time oozing about how beautiful Edward is and he just acts like the wounded dutiful boyfriend. Edward never develops a personality of his own; he’s instead regulated to being what every high school girl wishes her perfect man would be. The vampire family he comes from are mainly plot devices put into play to move the story along instead of being a part of it. Same with the Werewolf posse that show up in New Moon and exist to protect people from Vampires but are really there to give Edward a foil for Bella’s affections via Jacob her wolf buddy.

The danger is never dangerous it’s never compelling or even a little frightening. Worse than that you don’t even care how the characters will get out of the mess they’re in because you know it’ll be just as simple as the rest of the book or movie. I also find it fascinating how Edward is supposed to be one hundred and eight years old but maintains the emotional maturity of a seventeen-year-old boy. You’d think simply by his length of bone he’d be a little more on the ball emotionally. Then again he’s one hundred and eight and still in high school so what does that tell you.

09. Shirtless Werewolves Do It Quicker!

This is more a movie issue than anything else but it’s still kind of bizarre. Apparently once you become a Werewolf you want to make sure to go unnoticed by walking around in pants with no shirt. You’d also apparently inherit rock hard abs once the change happens. Are there no chubby Werewolves or are they simply eaten once they’re born? I would also think it’d be hard to strut through the Pacific Northwest in no shirt when it gets balls shriveling cold up there. I guess the intense heat of being a Werewolf trapped in the body of a street hustler keeps you warm.

I was also curious exactly why the transformation into a Werewolf took eight seconds from start to finish? Bones just don’t do that, skin doesn’t do that, and fur doesn’t grow that fast. Remember American Werewolf In London? That dude was invested in that transformation. Even the old fifties Werewolf had to sit there for five minutes while the camera “faded” him into lycanthrope glory. Not in Twilight, in that reality completely changing your entire physical make up is like sneezing or throwing up. I guess it’s why Werewolves don’t wear shirts in their human form. If they do they can’t change that fast. Much the same way that if you leave your tray down or seat reclined a plane can’t land.

08. Diamond Skin, the Jazz Hands Of The Vampire World.

While the shirtless Werewolves have their own cross to bear it’s not nearly as silly as the Diamond Skin issues that plague the vampire world. Not being satisfied with making all the Vampires look like underwear models Meyer added in the gem of an idea (pun intended) that Vampire’s can’t go into the sun because if they do their skin shines like diamonds thus giving away their supernaturalness. Um, what? Why do that? How do you even think of something that stupid? I have an idea let’s remove the fundamental idea that sunlight destroys Vampires and instead make it that the sun makes them too sexy.

Besides just being a cheesy and lame idea it pisses me off because it makes no sense. I’m out tooling around through the woods and I see some guy standing around with diamond shiny skin I’m going to figure he has a dangerous addiction to body glitter not that’s he’s a supernatural predator. When I watched this scene all I could think of was the Kay Jewelers tag line “Every kiss begins with Kay” and that was only in-between bouts of hysterical hyena laughter. If Meyer wanted her Vampires to be this homoerotic why be coy, just change Bella to Ben and get on with it.

07. Twilight Moms

There is nothing more sad and pathetic than a Twilight Mom. For those of you who have been spared this travesty of human evolution let me clue you in. Apparently there is an entire sect of Moms in this country whose lives are so empty and devoid of meaning that they have latched onto the Twilight books. Try to imagine this without feeling the Douche Chills. I seriously doubt you can. These are not just mothers trying to relate to their daughters these are full-fledged fans of this series who show up at the movie premieres and festivals armed with signs and screams about loving Edward and Jacob.

Am I alone in finding this incredibly bone chillingly creepy? What do these woman do between books? Hit on their kids friends? Is there a batch of happy delivery boys who get an extra “tip” when they show up to these overheated ladies’ homes? How sad and hollow must an adult’s life be to be a devoted fan of badly written children’s books? It’s even sadder than the romance novel women because at least those stories are about adults. Fabio may be cheesy but at least he’s of age. I’m guessing Twilight Mom may become the new MILF.

“Dude did you see that girl’s mom?”

“Yeah dude, total Twilight Mom.”

06. The Cast Blows

This is a pretty simple reason but one that still burns my gears. Everybody in these movies has an emotional gamut that runs from A to maybe B on a good day. Edward just looks sullen, he seems to have other emotion. Even when he’s supposed to be angry it looks more like heavy pouting. Robert Pattinson’s acting makes me think this is what would have happened if Pinocchio remained a wooden boy but somehow grew up to become an actor. I’ve seen more intensity on Iron Chef than this guy ever puts forth in these movies. No matter how close to death or destruction Edward gets he never seems more than bored with it all. That doesn’t really add up to excitement or tension on screen.

Then we have Kristin Stewart who plays Bella and while I do think she’s extremely attractive she’s another one that can’t do much more than look bored. She delivers her lines like her inner volume has been permanently turned down to four and if she wants to show real inner turmoil she puts her finger in or near her mouth. Stewart is even worse than Pattinson because she also seems irritated she has to be there, as if the whole process is just too annoying for her. Sorry sweets you signed up, you cashed the check you get in there and pretend you’re amped.

05. Nobody Puts Baby In A Corner!

Focusing back onto the books I was amazed and a little pissed that after all this falderal and excitement the Twilight series ends with Bella and Edward trying to save their kid. It’s not even a fight to the death save or a battle save it’s a long court scene, like something out of Law And Order: Vampire Intent. That’s the best Stephanie Meyer could do, a giant cliché court scene complete with a clichéd last minute witness who helps solve everything?

Apparently the Volturi (the Vampire court system) are told the new Baby is an immortal and has to be destroyed. That could’ve been a great catalyst for a vampire civil war or maybe Bella goes back with Jacob and the Werewolves go head to head with the Vamps for Bella’s life. Nope, not at all, it’s time for another go-round with the undead legal system.

I also laughed for like an hour when I heard Jacob sees this baby when she’s first born and “imprints” on it. Apparently in the no-time-for-plot-development world of Stephanie Meyer Werewolves instinctually “bond” with a person and they become soul mates. Sounds more like a bad plot device to turn all the characters in Twilight into some kind of undead Clampet clan. Creepy!

04. The Directors Can’t Leave Fast Enough

So now not only are the filmmakers organizing their colorforms playset in order to create the third movie in the Twilight series but also they’ve already hired a new director. As of this moment no one director has stayed on more than one Twilight movie. While this might not be a full on reason to hate a movie it is something that bothers me. What do these directors know that we don’t? My theory is that they just can’t take doing another one. That the amount of liquor and alcohol needed to keep from hanging themselves when they realized what they were involved with took too much of a toll on their bodies.

I also think that Twilight somehow takes talented directors and forces them to put on this tripe, which is something the directors can’t handle. Catherine Hardwicke the woman responsible for the movie Thirteen which was quite good directed the first Twilight movie and it was downright horrible. Chris Weitz directed The Golden Compass as well as About A Boy and then turned out New Moon? I’m guessing after the first few weeks of production the directors started hitting the sauce and flying through the script to get it finished, not caring if it’s any good or not.

The next movie, Eclipse, is set to be helmed by David Slade who directed the difficult but well done Hard Candy and 30 Days Of Night. I wonder how long he’ll last before he has to self-medicate in order to stop crying long enough to shoot these marketing-schemes-disguised-as-movies. I guess only time will tell.

03. Two Words: Racial Politics

Has anybody noticed at all the borderline offensive racial politics in these movies? Well let’s take a look see at how race breaks down in the world of Twilight. First off there’s the evil Vampire who is also black. Granted he’s not the only bad Vampire around but he’s pretty much the only black one. Much like George Lucas’s Star Wars there are very few black people in the Vampire world and the one we get to see mostly is evil.

Then there’s the Werewolf Native American Tribe who are basically the subservient workforce. Their job is to protect all the rest of us from Vampires, especially the lily-white girl at the center of it all. Looking at it another way the Native Americans in these books are the working class, here to serve and protect the white boss man but when they try to date a white girl they get completely shut down.

I also love how the Werewolves live and dress like working class people, living in the forest and out of sight. Meanwhile the porcelain white Vampires get to go wherever they want, they have a big fancy council and all this prime real estate in Italy. Why not have a supernatural banker named Frankensteinberg or a chef named Mummy Chang? How about The Creature From The Middle East Lagoon or something really sensitive like that.

I’m sure there are those who say I’m off base here and I may be overdramatizing it but the whispers are there. Not to mention all the just-under-the-surface Mormon messages that Stephanie Meyer managed to work into the writing. Whether on purpose or just pure insensitivity it kind of pisses me off when so many young kids are going to end up reading this drivel.

02. Yep, Now Vampires Are Pussies.

Remember when Vampires kicked ass? They were evil creatures of the night that swooped down and ripped you to pieces, sucking your blood and taking your life in a violent manner. Even when they were seductive they were still fearsome and terrifying. Yeah well, that’s all gone now thanks to Twilight. With the success of these movies all Vampires have become emo bandleaders with winning smiles and cool clothes. All around us right now in pop culture the vampire is nothing but a giant pussy, no matter how tough he acts.

Even though The Vampire Diaries is based on a book series actually older than Twilight it would’ve never come to TV if not for the Era Of Edward. Mainly because nobody would buy vampires as high school fashionistas. Twilight has drained all the fear and excitement out of Vampires and neutered them into that sad kid at recess who writes poetry and thinks a Beret makes him look sophisticated. No more Vlad The Impaler now it’s Edward The Charming.

Even the supposed bad guy Vampires in Twilight had zero in the way of real menace to them. Is it that hard to do? Anne Rice managed to swath the Vampire Lestat in silk and knickers but keep him a brutal, evil killer. No more of that, no more blood on the teeth and flesh on the mouth we gotta make room for Diamond Skin and perfect hair.

Even Vampire movies like 30 Days Of Night (no, the irony of the director is not lost on me) are shunned and tossed aside in lieu of the newer, friendlier, house broken Vampire Boyfriend. Stephanie Meyers has managed to obliterate the entire crux of what makes Vampires so great in new fell heavily coiffed swoop. It’s enough to make you cry.

01. Crazy Chick Syndrome

Another awesome thing about the Twilight series is how it will introduce a whole new generation of woman to the world of being total psychopathic bitches in order to get their way. Bella isn’t misunderstood; she’s flat out nuts. She’s the embodiment of that crazy girl we all dated who we tried to save or fix until she made our lives so miserable we had to run screaming into the night. Only this time we don’t run we’re supposed to root for her.

Bella’s hit parade of cuckoo starts almost instantly when she sees Edward. He wants nothing to do with her and ignores her so what does she do? She doggedly pursues him because he’s so good looking. That’s a good role model for the girls out there. Even when Edward tells her he’s a creature of the undead it’s fine with her as long as they’re together. This allows new girls to know that if a guy is hot, accept whatever damage he has because that’s what’s important.

When Edward leaves her high and dry in New Moon does Bella flip him off and go find another boyfriend? Nope, she goes right off the reservation and starts acting out insanely dangerous stunts in order to think about him. Not only does that make no sense but DING DING DING it’s another super win for the bad example for young girls department. When Bella finally finds another beefcake supernatural stud to lead around by the dick (Jacob) she still isn’t happy.

She makes Jacob The Werewolf believe they have a future together and even gets pissed when he isn’t around as much because he’s out trying to find the Vampire looking to kill her. The bastard. Then when Edward, who LEFT HER ASS returns she kicks Werewolf boy to the curb and starts following Edward around.

Forget at all the human guy who tries to ask Bella out he’s just shattered into pieces because there’s no way some lowly nice guy would be good enough for this tempest of heartbreak and sorrow. Bella is a narcissistic, self-involved cocktease who does little more than bitch and moan about her life. She’s almost calculatingly unlikeable and the idea that young women identify with her frightens me for young men everywhere. Congrats Stephanie Meyer you’ve managed to reinstall the idea that crazy chicks are something to aspire to.

Well that’s it, those are the ten reasons this whole Twilight phenomenon chaps my ass. I’m hoping it becomes yet another fashion trend that ten years from now is seen as a total embarrassment ala leg warmers or giant Benetton sweaters. If Twilight becomes a footnote in the apocalypse of pop culture then fine but I fear it won’t. I fear vampires and their fans will be suffering with this for years to come.

--

And now another post from The Oatmeal
How Twilight Works

http://theoatmeal.com/story/twilight

A few weeks ago I had the miserable experience of reading Twilight. A friend bought it for me and I took it with me to read on a long flight from Seattle to Houston. I knew it was going to be crappy, but I thought it would be a guilty pleasure kind of crappy - where you know it's bad but you still get enjoyment out of it. I actually managed to power through around 400 pages until I gave up and started reading Sky Mall. I've been seeing Twilight everywhere lately, especially with ~~Vampire Teens II~~ New Moon's release, so I thought I'd break down why chicks go apeshit for it.

First off, the author creates a main character which is an empty shell.
Her appearance isn't described in detail; that way, any female can slip into it and easily fantasize about being this person.
I read 400 pages of that book and barely had any idea of what the main character looked like; as far as I was concerned she was a giant Lego brick.
Appearance aside, her personality is portrayed as insecure, fumbling, and awkward - a combination anyone who ever went through puberty can relate to.
By creating this "empty shell," the character becomes less of a person and more of something a female reader can put on and wear.
Because I forgot her name (I think it was Barbara or Brando or something like that), I'm going to refer to her as "Pants" from here on out.

So after a few chapters of listening to Pants whine about high school, sucking at volleyball, and being the center of attention, the second major character is introduced.
Imagine everything women want in a man, then exaggerate it by ten thousand - and you've got Edward Cullen.
The level of detail that the author goes into while describing Edward's appearance is remarkable.
At one point while reading I started counting the number of times the author used the expression "Edward's perfect face," and it was far into the double digits.
The author excruciatingly details his muscular pecs, clothing, hair, eye color - even his goddamn breath (I'm not joking).

Edward intensely listens to everything Pants has to say, even if she's bitching about she had diarrhea on Christmas or her preferred method for cutting a sandwich in half.
As far as the reader is concerned, Edward cares about nothing in the world more than Pants.
What the author has done is created a perfect male figure - a pale Greek statue which the reader can worship and in turn be worshipped by.

So what about men that like Twilight?

If you're male and you like Twilight, you're gay. I don't mean that in the derogatory sense, I mean it in the "you want to put your testicles against another man's testicles while gripping handfuls of chesthair" kind of way.

And the movie?
The movie is just the same uninspired crap shat out onto a film reel. If you like the taste of horse manure on your bologna sandwiches, you're probably gonna like it on your birthday cake as well. The same principle applies with Twilight.

Beyond that, it's just a romance novel with the occasional vampire teen drama bullshit peppered here and there. It doesn't really break any new ground in the realm of vampire fiction, other than portraying vampires as a family of uncomfortable retards who prance around the woods eating deer and bunny rabbits. There's lots of nervous lip-biting, tender kisses between Pants and Edward, and lengthy descriptions of every feature of Edward's body. Pants is a static character who never really progresses beyond being an insecure vampire fangirl who obsesses over Edward. Whether her character grows beyond that is unknown to me, I'd stopped reading by then and shifted my attention to an electric butt-massaging chair in Sky Mall.

Facebook has the konami code!

2009-11-16T23:09:00.001-05:00

FACEBOOK TRICK:

Press Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Enter key then right click Then press up & down & Magic circles will appear! The only way to stop it is to log off or reload the page...

By the way.. did you try it here? :)

TURBO - Better than that Gamer crap that's on theathers

2009-10-07T22:12:00.000-05:00

TURBO from Jarrett Lee Conaway on Vimeo.

Official Site: http://www.turbothemovie.com/

Google sends a Cease and Desist to Cyanogen! ಠ_ರೃ

2009-09-26T00:14:00.003-05:00

If you have an android phone, you may be aware that Google screwed up today,

and that if you had a rooted device, today you preety much have all the motivation

to feel like crap.

This is by no means a nice move from Google, so the Fuhrer had something to say

about the topic:

All Android phone owners read this post and engulf in flaming immolating rage:
http://phandroid.com/2009/09/25/eff-google-screw-android-the-backlash-begins/

When in complete absolute boredom: Go to vark.com and ask completely random questions to completely random people

2009-09-17T22:25:00.007-05:00

-HAI, I HAS A QUESTION-

Some examples include:

Does anyone know what is the weirdest tasting type of food?

Phillip K. > Thanks for asking. It's http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casu_marzu

Me > that is quite disgusting! by far the weirdest thing ive seen in ages. thanks for the quick reply!

Phillip K. > you've got to admit, it's pretty weird.

Joshua K. > I think that this is a matter of personal opinion. I personally think that tofu tastes really weird but my friend loves it. Another of my friends think that soymilk tastes really weird but I love it. So I think its all a matter of opinion.

Shira K. > I think that is a pretty subjective question but check this out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miracle_fruit

Adam S. > hmm...it's a very interesting question, I don't really know but there are some kinds of really stinky tropic fruits which are popular in south east asia.

Lisa T. > blood or durian

Nathan L > durian

Ashwin S. > I once had sand liver in Japan. It was pretty weird. I didn't even know what type of animal it was...

Rommel R > eating pig's blood. it looks odd but tasty lol

Does anyone know how many types or brands of Absinthe are there in existence?

Adam S. > You could try this: http://www.feeverte.net/guide/archives.html or this http://www.absinthebuyersguide.com/guide.html

Daniela B. > There are countless different types of absinthe; i don't think there's a definitive list. but here are the different "styles": Blanche, or la Bleue; Verte: Absenta; Housegemacht

Dominick P. > I don't know about all the different brands, but there are both absinthe and absenthe out there.

What is the answer to life, the universe, and everything?

Eric F. > there is no "correct" answer. YOU must find the answer in yourself. Consult Wikipedia if you wish:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life,_the_Universe_and_Everything Good luck!

Danny C. > 42.

Gordon S. > Forty two.

Let the game be beautiful

2009-09-02T02:04:00.000-05:00

Beyond all the analysis, past all the breakdowns – the deconstruction and dissection, it is what it is… a guy meeting a girl.

Three and a half years later and there’s been hurt feelings, rejection, anger, even despair.

I’ve tried every angle, every method and approach.

And after all of it, the realization that at it’s highest levels, the game is simply one thing – beautiful.

A simple enjoyment of the moment in its purest form.

Sharing a thought, sharing a laugh. Hearing that voice in your head crop up and say “you shouldn’t be saying this” and simply ignoring it. Being faced with the awareness of what to do but instead simply letting it rest with “It is what it is”…

So the voice in your head says “Ok, now you should…enjoy”.

Go out. Notice a beautiful girl. Take a deep breath. Say to her “Hey, you’re beautiful…” let there be a pause, let the be a nervous laugh, then say “hah, that’s really it.”

Let her draw a sense of easiness from you.

Look into her eyes. Get distracted. Apologize and say “sorry, I got distracted, what was that?” and smile.

Maybe touch her. Not because it’s the right move, but because you think she’s cute.

Call her. Tell her your bed would be better if she were in it.

Really.

Call her and say “My bed would be better if you were in it right now”.

Then say “I think you’re super cute…”

Be insecure.

“I wanna see you tomorrow…”

Get frustrated.

“Cancel your dinner, come out with me”

At the end of the day, all you’ve got is you.

And all she’s got is her.

Go first. Let her see you.

Let her follow you.

Smile.

Give her a kiss.

I’m not saying kiss her. I’m saying GIVE her a kiss.

Do it again.

Hold her hand.

Pause… enjoy it. Take a deep breath. Look at her, appreciate her.

Pull her close to you, smell her, tell her what she smells like.

Tell her what you’re thinking.

Ask yourself – would her life be better with you in it?

Know that her life would be better with you in it.

Look at her and think to yourself “It’d be fine even if we ended up as just friends”.

Kiss her, grin and know that you’re going to be more than ‘just friends’…

Have fun.

Pull… or stay… it’s all good either way.

Text her, tell her you had fun.

Tell her you’d like to see her soon.

Send her kisses.

Tell her you want to come over. Not to get her to come over but just to let her know that somewhere out there there’s a guy that’d like her to come over.

Say good night.

And tomorrow do it again. Maybe kissing her good morning, maybe starting from scratch. It’s nice either way.

A smile is contagious, laughter is infectious.

Shed the weight, take a deep breath. Have a look around, these are the days.

Sleep time for me – yoga date in the a.m.

SOURCE (By Ryan) -- here

TREEVENGE!! - OMFG (Gory post)

2009-07-17T20:04:00.000-05:00

Treevenge details the experiences and horrifying reality of the lives of Christmas trees. Clearly, for trees, Christmas isn’t the exciting “peace on earth” that is experienced by most. After being hacked down, and shipped away from their homes, they quickly become strung up, screwed into an upright position for all to see, exposed in a humiliation of garish decorations. But this Christmas will be different, this Christmas the trees have had enough, this Christmas the trees will fight back. Treevenge could be a short film about the end of days for Christmas trees, or perhaps, the end of humanity?

INSANE CAR STUNTS :D

2009-07-08T22:26:00.002-05:00

BETUN - EL PERRO TOQUETÓN

2009-07-04T10:40:00.000-05:00

A Huge post to scare the shit out of people: WE WILL ALL DIE IN 3 DAYS!! -- NOT...

2009-07-04T10:04:00.003-05:00

Discovered last month in a UK barley field, this crop circle appears to be a jellyfish. But intrepid crop circle analysts have discovered that it predicts a devastating solar storm on July 7. And they have diagrams to prove it.

Let's start with some plain facts. A commenter named Harold Stryderight on Cropcircleconnector.com explains it all to you:

Whenever a severe solar storm impacts directly on Earth, then our planetary magnetic field or "magnetosphere" changes into the general shape of a "jellyfish". That seems to be what those crop artists were telling us at Wayland's Smithy on May 29, 2009.

When looking at this lovely crop circle of a jellyfish, this does seem to be the obvious conclusion to reach. If it's a jellyfish, it must be the magnetosphere. I mean that's just common sense. Also, we have a helpful diagram showing how similar the jellyfish really is to this atmospheric phenomenon.

But who would be satisfied with just figuring out the jellyfish/magnetosphere correlation? Nobody, that's who. So Stryderight has delved deeper, analyzing every aspect of the jellyfish to determine what the exact date will be of the solar storm bent on destroying our atmosphere. He explains:

The new crop picture shows also seven "eclipse" symbols in its central tail (white numbers 1 to 7), as well as seven streamers hanging off below (yellow numbers 1 to 7). Both of those features suggest that a solar storm may impact Earth on July 7, 2009, as has already been suggested by several other crop pictures from April or May. The new crop picture also shows a small, horizontal, four-circle band just between its head and its long tail (blue arrows, left or right above). That feature closely resembles a crop picture from July 20, 2008 which told us about eclipses. Indeed, the suggested date of July 7, 2009 for an upcoming solar storm will be a penumbral lunar eclipse.

So true. Why didn't I think of that? Because I am not a trained crop circle analyst. I just don't have the background. Here is another helpful diagram to make this all clear.

There is apparently a third possibility for what this crop circle means, and I'm really confused about how it relates to the sun and our atmosphere and stuff like that. I mean, I get that the human body is like the solar system in miniature. Maybe our expert can enlighten me. Another crop circle analyst named Sol Ar writes:

The tentacles are non-symmetrical and seem to depict an organic, moving layer or sheath around the jellyfish. Their purpose is protection. Once activated the 12-point chakra system, through the crown ‘doorway', will open human Beings to multi-dimensionality and envelop the physical body in an ethereal, protective shell. The tentacles also seem to suggest our awareness or consciousness flowing freely into the unified field. We are on a wondrous journey of self-discovery as we awaken to our essence and full potential.

I see. So basically after we recover from a massive solar storm that destroys our atmosphere, kills all our communications satellites, and takes down the power grid, we're going to awaken our potential. Because we're all going to be protected by an ethereal shell, which is like +10 armor that protects against photonic incursion.

You know what I love about crop circles? They always make me feel great.

Also, another Crop Circle was deciphered by another group, than the Jellyfish Circle - they too have come to a conclusion of a solar storm impacting the Earth on July 7th 2009 from this crop circle.

The first night it showed up, it looked like this:

Then after the next night it looked like this: It was added on to.

Then a few nights later it was added on to once again:

Besides being Gorgeous - it seems to have a powerful message in it, which is showing the degrees of where each planet is etc. Well, guess what date, all those planets positioned where they are comes out to be? Yep.... July 7th 2009.

How did they get to that conclusion? Here you go.

So these people took apart the crop circle by looking at the degrees and placements of the planets in the circle, besides the scientific sign of a CME at the center of the crop circle. Here is how they completely came to the conclusion of a solar storm impacting the Earth on July 6/7th 2009.

“For the past two years, our Sun has been abnormally quiet between solar cycles 23 and 24. Within the past month however, it has become more active. What if anything might happen shortly?

So in complete conclusion here is what they say:

“Based on previous examples from 2004 or early 2009, we can be pretty sure that the crop formation intelligence's use of a teardrop symbol does represent a coronal mass ejection (CME) from our Sun. Why then would they have drawn planet Earth in the form of a large teardrop on June 21, unless several CMEs will impact upon Earth soon?

“We can see on the left of that new crop picture a round circle for our Sun, which seems to be emitting five CMEs along curved paths through space that eventually intersect with planet Earth at the red asterisk.

Seeing that this crop circle was deciphered by another group other than the person who deciphered the Jellyfish crop circle and they have come to the same conclusion from this crop circle as the message of the Jellyfish crop circle. Don't you think someone is trying to get a message to us?

(KuroiZero: NOT REALLY.)

So, there you have it, Another crop circle deciphered to say the Earth will be impacted on the 7th of July by a solar storm.

Unknown QUAKE/DOOM life form found in NC sewer?

2009-07-04T09:58:00.002-05:00

With 3.3 million+ YouTube views in the past two days, the video “Unknown Lifeform in North Carolina Sewer” (below) is taking the web by storm, becoming the most viewed video this week and beating out a performance of Michael Jackson’s Thriller. The clip, which shows an alien-looking life form living in a North Carolina sewer, was posted along with a claim that it was extra-terrestrial life.
Today mainstream news has taken notice and corrected the myth: the video is indeed real, scientists say, but the strange creature is very much a terrestrial phenomenon. News14 writes:

Ed Buchan, environmental coordinator at the Raleigh Public Utilities Department, said staff biologists have confirmed that the “creature” is actually a colony of tubifex worms. The colonies attach themselves to roots that gradually work themselves into weak points in the pipes. “They seem to respond to the light from the camera,” Buchan said. “That light is pretty hot.”
The worms naturally occur in sewage and pond sediment and are actually sold both live and dried as fish food in pet stores. He said other staff members in the department have seen it before, although sightings aren’t particularly common. “I’ve seen a lot of sewer TV before and I’ve never seen them,” he said. “We were surprised. We didn’t know immediately what it was.”

It’s unclear what made the clip such a YouTube () phenomenon: most likely it’s explained by the mystery surrounding the strange creature, much like last year’s Montauk Monster mystery. Here's a video about it.

I say.. Tubifex COVER UP. Your shit's alive and wants revenge!!

Ten Things About Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen That Didn't Make Any Sense

2009-06-30T15:41:00.004-05:00

Haven't seen Transformers 2 yet? Here's an excellent recap of the film. For the full effect, punch yourself in the stomach once it's done.

Source: io9, seattlepi.com

--

After you have, read below (SPOILERS!!)

Okay?

Has everybody left seen the movie?

Solid. Here we go.

Don't get me wrong. I loved this movie like- 9.5/10, but there are some things that defy my conceptions of a good ass kicking movie. Admittedly, finding logic flaws in a summer blockbuster is fairly easy. But I think we've got to scuttle this "big, dumb, fun" notion once and for all. The Dark Knight was a smart and entertaining film. Same with Iron Man. Star Trek and Casino Royale are additional examples. So why, with Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen must we settle for plot points that don't make logical sense, character motivations that are silly, and interactions that don't fully add up? The studios spend hundreds of millions on entertainment; the least they can do is make all the pieces fit together nicely. Making excuses for conglomerates gets us nowhere. Lashing out at critics even less so. If we want better films we've got to stand up against this particular summer film. My issues? Well, since you asked, off the top of my head ...

1. Transformers Don't Mate

There are two examples in the film that would lead you to believe that Transformers are sexual beings. First off, a tiny Transformer attempts to copulate with Megan Fox's leg. Secondly, Devastator seems to have massive Decepticon testicles. Both of these happenings would you lead one to believe that giant metal robots mate, that they engage in the act of intercourse.

Only they don't. Because they are aliens made up entirely of metal. At the outset of the mythology there weren't even "female" Transformers because the Transformers had no gender at all. In fact, it's specifically mentioned in the film that the "little ones" are dying without the Energon cube, the very thing The Decipticons are trying to get their hands on, which would further indicate that it's more of a spawning/energy sort of birth for The Transformers.

Besides that, the joke doesn't even make sense, because a little Transformer shouldn't find Megan Fox's leg attractive. They are not in the same genus or species, they aren't even from the same planet. It would be akin to Megan Fox becoming aroused by a very shiny toaster. Idiotic.

2. Sam Witwicky's Hand Gets Bandaged By Ghosts

When the gang is all transported to The Middle East Shia's real-life injury is explained by him exploding outwards from Jetfire. So the causation of the injury is shown. But five seconds later Shia has what appears to be a professional level wrapping job on his hand. Who did this? Where did they get the supplies? And where on Megan Fox's body would all that gauze have been stored?

3. Sam Witwicky Would Have Been Killed by the Mini-Transformers at Close Range

When Sam's kitchen comes alive he's chased into his bedroom. He's then shot, at a distance of about 10 inches, with a full battery of mini-ordinance. My original thought was that mini-Transformers don't fire debilitating weapons, only this is contradicted the moment Sam escapes his room and they proceed to destroy the front yard. Thus, if they have the power to destroy a home they have the power to kill a human at close range.

4. Decepticons Don't Need to "Set Traps" With Sam's Parents

The Decepticons had the advantage of speed and superior firepower. They were closing in on the humans and their Autobot protectors. Why would they then need to traipse out Sam Witwicky's parents? It makes no sense. If you could get close enough to Sam to even show him his parents then you're close enough to kill / capture him. That little maneuver slowed Sam up for about five seconds, but it evidently took hours of careful planning and coordination by The Decepticons. It's the Coors Light Cold Can Technology of evil plans: A hell of a lot of work for absolutely no gain.

5. Why Not Drive the Final Two Miles Instead of Sprinting?

Sam is dropped off because Bumblebee can't make it to the village. So Sam and Mikaela running is better than a Camero at full speed? Sure, the Camero makes a more inviting target, but it also goes ten times faster. If The Decepticons were advancing to the point that they were putting too much heat on Bumblebee then they sure as hell would have caught two people running around in the 15 minutes it took them to close the distance to the village. It was an artificial attempt at tension, and a transparent one at that.

6. Five Targets Sink to Depths to Get Megatron ... and Yet Six Come Out

That math makes sense if The Decepticons hadn't destroyed a little Transformer on the ocean floor to facilitate Megatron's rebirth. But they did. So five targets went down, and five went up, which should have caused a bit of confusion for the humans. Only they reported five down, six up. Perhaps the Decepticons were bringing that last one home for a proper burial?

7. Leo Spitz Yells "I Don't Want to Go To Prison!"

Really? You've been kidnapped by giant metallic aliens, you're being chased by another and more evil set of giant metallic aliens, but your main concern IS PRISON?? I would think prison would be a welcome respite from, oh, I don't know, almost being blown to bits every five seconds.

8. The Back of the Smithsonian is a desert?

Devin Faraci from Chud pointed this one out. Quote:

At one point the characters walk out of the back door of the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum in Washington DC and end up blatantly in Arizona at the Sorona Desert Airplane Graveyard.

I get that we're all suspending disbelief, and this is meant for entertainment, and it's a "popcorn" movie. But the man was handed hundred of millions of dollars to craft a story. You're telling me no one noticed this jarring lack of continuity? However, if Jetfire transported them to Sorona this technically makes sense, even though his transporting ability was never explained or fully realized until the Jordan/Egypt trip.

9. One Aircraft Carrier is Destroyed in 90 Seconds. The Rest Are Left in Peace?

When Megatron is rescued from the bottom of the ocean the Decepticons go through an aircraft carrier like a hot knife through butter. Later we see an additional air craft carrier launching fighters to provide support. Why didn't The Decipticons take an extra 15 minutes and simply destroy the rest of the fleet?

10. The Human Female Transformer

In Michael Bay's continual quest to make all things sexual, he presents a Decepticon Transformer that's posing as a human to get the shard from Sam. Why aren't there more of these models? Seems to me that Transformers who looked exactly like humans would have access to all sorts of things. Just look at Battlestar Galactica, a show that presents all kinds of interesting dilemmas around the idea of machines infiltrating the human race.

Bonus: The President's Messenger

The annoying fellow in the suit who continually issues painfully stupid orders would have actually been The Secretary of Defense. And to get to be The Secretary of Defense you generally need to be about 60 years old with some semblance of a clue.

Double Bonus: The Transformers Have Superior Technology ... and yet heat-seeking eludes them?

Sam and Mikaela would have given off different heat signatures in the desert. One missile should have done them in. But no, The Decepticons evidently have to get within two feet to hurt them, and even then they only knock a bunch of buildings over. Frankly, it's amazing to me that The Decepticons haven't just spontaneously combusted. They are the most incompetent (yet overwhelmingly powerful) villains ever. However, it's been brought to my attention that The Decepticons actually needed the fairy dust Sam was running around with, not him dead, so I suppose they didn't want to harm the shard fairy dust? Sigh. This is the kind of conversation we get into once a film goes off the rails.

Did I miss any? Should Jetfire have even had an old man voice? What do green eyes mean in gigantic pyramid-climbing multi-part-robots? I can't think of the precise reason the racist Autobot twins don't make any sense but I'm definitely willing to listen. Until then, stay super.

Who's Michael Jackson?! Hmm her name seems somewhat familiar. (sarcasm)

2009-06-27T13:22:00.003-05:00

This is ignorant! Your all being ignorant!

Michael Jackson is dead, Facebook reports. "RIP MJ ILL MISS U," wrote Facebook user/reporter Jennifer Collins who was on hand at her computer at the King of Pop's time of death.Rumor has it he was undergoing a hush hush plastic surgery procedure in the privacy of his home and died of complications during the procedure. Rumor has it MJ never died. He faked his death so people would buy more albums and popularity would go up and then he can inherit his own estate.

The procedure was supposed to be easy as 1 2 3... I heard they were taking cartilage from his ear to put on his nose and he accidentally heard them and died of fright.
But I guess things went wrong, and he had a heart attack at 3:15, when the big hands and little hands touch, and so his plastic heart couldn't beat it.

Yesterday, Michael Jackson dolls were going for 15 bucks. Now they're going upwards of 250. After this, MTV realized it is profitable to play his videos again.

Also, as of yesterday afternoon, there was no official statement from NAMBLA, shocking many of its members. No comments from Macaulay Culkin either but Target has announced they are having a tribute sale in honor of the King of Pop… boys pants half off.

Experts across the media speculated on how many more heart attacks it would take to reunite the Jackson Five. Most said four.

Also, out of respect, McDonalds has released the McJackson burger. 50 year old meat between 10 year old buns.

Facebook has promised regular updates from its top reporters over the next few hours. At least until someone else dies.

Tomorrow in the news: Michael Jackson’s ashes are going to be put in a gigantic NeverLand Etch A Sketch.

Ecuadorian Holidays - what I miss

2009-05-28T16:33:00.003-05:00

Note: the regional independence days (Quito, Guayaquil, Cuenca) are celebrated in the whole country.
As you would guess, we have Halloween, Valentine's Day, Christmas and all those things. We do not celebrate Thanksgiving nor St. Patrick's.

Ecuadorian NATIONAL HOLIDAYS (usually vacations!):

1st of January: Año Nuevo (New Year's day); Most crapulent day of the year, absolutely nothing is happening throughout the country.

14th of February: Valentine's Day. Just an excuse to party and to make out.
Middle of February : Carnival week, same as Mardi Gras week; throughout the country; Already few days before, as usual in the Ecuadorian carnival, a lot of water is splashed. Although forbidden by Quito's city council, this amusement goes on.

Holy Week "Semana Santa", is celebrated the week before Easter and starts on Domingo de Ramos (Palm Sunday). The celebration is held all over the country. There are some processions in the streets on Good Friday, specially in Quito. A very important tradition during the Holy week that is worth to mention is the "Fanesca". Which is a traditional soup made with Bacalao (salt fish) and several different grains. During these days the Catholics don't eat meat.
About the same time, in Ambato there's a big fruit and flower festival, the Fiesta de las Flores y Frutas.

1st of May: Día del Trabajador (Labor day); labor parades organized by the labor unions in all the big cities, primarily in Quito and Guayaquil. Ironically, no one works in labor day.

24th of May: Batalla del Pichincha (Battle of Pichincha); The dramatic victory over the Spanish is mainly celebrated in Quito.

25th of July: Fundación de Guayaquil; Foundation of Guayaquil!
10th of August: Primer Grito de la Independencia (First Outcry of Independence); first declaration of the Independence of Quito
26th of September: Día de la Bandera - no vacation, "Day of the ecuadorian flag"; Patriotic holiday with speeches on the schoolyards throughout the country. Students that are in their last year of every education period (6th grade, 6th course of high school, graduation year) swear allegiance to the flag on this date.
9th of October: Independencia de Guayaquil (Independence day of Guayaquil); Very big party in Guayaquil, but throughout the country mainly on television.

31st of October: Día del Escudo Nacional - no vacation, "Day of the ecuadorian emblem"; Patriotic holiday with speeches on the schoolyards throughout the country. Students that are in their last year of every education period (6th grade, 6th course of high school, graduation year) swear allegiance to the flag on this date.
31st of October: Halloween - no vacation. Just another excuse to party and to have little children and crazy grownups in disguise.
2nd of November: Día de los Difuntos (All Souls Day)
Families visit their deceased grave. Some little town have meals on the graves. Big cities only visit such graves and leave flowers.

The typical food for All Souls Day is "guaguas de pan", accompanied by a beverage called "colada morada". These foods have a remote origin in the Incas.

"Guaguas de pan" is bread baked in the shaped of child figurines decorated with pastry frosting. "Guagua" is the Quichua word for "child".
"Colada morada" is a drink of a variety of berries with other exotic fruits and spices that give this beverage its purplish color.
3rd of November: Independencia de Cuenca (Independence day of Cuenca); Street parades in Cuenca.
6th of December: Fundación de Quito (Foundation day of Quito)
24th of December: Noche buena. (First Christmas holiday) In Ecuador families gather the night before Christmas, rather than on the 25th. And eat large christmas meals usually with turkey as the main course at midnight. It is accustomed to go to church.
25th of December: Second Christmas holiday. It is accustomed to go to church.
31st of December : Año Viejo (Old Year's Day); Lots and lots of legal and illegal firecrackers; Burning of large and huge, self-made paperboard dolls (viejos or monigotes), that mostly represent unpopular persons from politics and the public live are made during this time of the year and are burned at midnight in very large piles, after which most families dine (turkey, pork or something tasty). The sky turns slightly red due to all the flames and firecrackers. It is accustomed to go to church in the evening since it is also Virgin Mary's day.

Other dates, festivals and fairs, that are NOT NATIONAL HOLIDAYS (no national vacation these dates):
On these holidays many banks and offices are open because many of them are regionally limited.

6th of January: Día de los Reyes , The three Magi; pure religious holiday.
12th of February: Día del Oriente (Discovery of the Amazon by Francisco de Orellana); Agricultural exhibitions and folkloristic parades in the province capitals of the "Oriente" (Tena, Puyo, Macas and Zamora)

12th of February: Galápagos: Día de la Provincia; Colorful parades and festivals on the enchanted islands.

14th of February: Fiesta de San Valentín (Valentine's Day); The gringo (or the gringa) who doesn't give flowers to his/her Ecuadorian lover, is considered a "crude debauchee".

27th of February: Día del Ejercito (Army day), and Batalla de Tarqui respectively (Battle of Tarqui); This day in the year 1829 was the glorious victory of the greatcolombia n army. In Tarqui, near Guayaquil, 8000 soldiers of the Peruvian army were put to flight by 4000 Ecuadorians. This battle is considered the biggest triumph over the southern neighbor.

4th to 10th of March: Gualaceo; Peach festival, one hour from Cuenca

13th of April: Teacher's Day. This is the birthdate of Juan Montalvo, one of the most famous ecuadorian essayists. Teachers and intellect are paised on this day. This is also David Chang's birthday.
17th to 21st of April: Riobamba; Agriculture and handcraft holidays.

13th of May: Foundation of the Republic (1830); In Ecuador almost nobody knows it!
24th of June: Otavalo, Tabacundo and Guamote; Fiesta de San Juan (Saint John's festival); Popular Indian dances and mask parades, as well as a traditional boozing party in these little towns, in the Indian communes and "haciendas" (estates). Well worth seeing!

1st of July: Día Nacional del Pasillo; Day of the traditional, national music, the so-called Pasillo. Revival concerts and nostalgic radio transmissions in remembrance of Julio Jaramillo (J.J.), the most famous representative of this genre of music.
24th of July: Nacimiento de Simón Bolívar (Birthday of Simón Bolívar); The ceremonies last two days at the coast, one day in the highland.

3rd to 5th of August: Fiestas de Esmeraldas (Independence ceremonies); Salsa, Marimba and spectacular Afro-Latin live concerts in the capital of tropical music. In addition, exhibitions of different agricultural products.

End of August: Santa Rosa; International crawfish and shrimp fair.

2nd to 5th of September: Otavalo, Fiesta del Yamor; Colorful harvest festival, Folkloric shows and cockfights.

Beginning of September: Cotacachi, Fiesta de Jora; harvest festival with music and dance shows.
8th to 9th of September: Sangolquí; Popular bullfights (corridas de toros), half an our from Quito.

Third week in September: Loja, Catamayo, El Cisne: Believers procession of the Virgen del Cisne, one of the biggest and most impressive processions in America. See below "Loja"!

20th to 26th of September: Machala , International banana fair and miss banana beauty queen contest. See below "Machala"!
23rd to 24th of September: Latacunga, Fiesta de la Mama Negra; One of the most traditional festivals, that demonstrates the fusion of catholic and Indian elements. See below "Latacunga"!
Beginning of October: Durán (Eloy Alfaro), International fair (technics, handcrafts, live concerts). See below "Guayaquil"!

12th and 13th of October: In the provinces of Guayas and Los Rios , in many towns, colorful and traditional Rodeos Montubios (spectacular horse shows) take place. As horses and pack animal have always been related to the daily activities of the people in this topical and hot region, these festivals offer a very special and interesting diversion for visitors of the coast and the city Guayaquil. The most famous places for the "Rodeos" are: Samborondón, Salitre, Daule and Yaguachi (province of Guayas), as well as Vinces, Baba and Babahoyo (province of Los Ríos).
11th of November: Independence day of Latacunga.
21st of November : El Quinche (Pichincha), pilgrims walk to the pilgrimage church from the virgin Reina del Quinche.

SOME OF WHAT I MISS THE MOST

- Pilsener brand beer
- Illegal Firecrackers
- Everyday piracy
- Speeding and reckless driving
- The beaches (Playas, Salinas, Montañita)

World’s Top 10 Fastest Electric Cars - Gas 2.0 post

2009-04-18T17:44:00.000-05:00

Think a Ferrari is fast? Watch one get schooled below.

Electric cars are no joke. Yes, it’s true that many EVs are small, ungainly-looking oddities, but the other end of the spectrum—the realm of high-performance supercars—might surprise you.

After re-discovering a 1972 electric datsun that can accelerate from 0-60 in 3 seconds, we decided that an important question hadn’t really been answered yet: how do the electric cars we’ve been hearing so much about stack up in terms of performance?
Below, we’ve listed the world’s top 10 fastest electric cars, based on the best available information (and a little creative license). Note that our criteria does not take into account a variety of important factors like charging time, availability, and cost. All cars are simply ranked by the time it takes them to get from 0-60 mph.
Most of the machines shown here are either not available or otherwise out out of the realm of possibility for most, but then again, so are most high-performance gas-powerd cars. And that doesn’t keep us from admiring them. Please keep in mind that this post is not intended to be the final word on this topic.
Btw, if you’re interested in joining the first mailing list dedicated to bulk purchasing electric cars, check it out (you can also get cheap solar there too).

Disclaimer: The numbers below come primarily from builder websites, although some are visibly validated in the videos below. Some of these cars only exist in the imaginations of the designers, so for those we’ll have to wait for some real-world testing to take place. Enjoy.

1. Shelby SuperCars Aero EV: 0-60 mph in 2.5s

The Aero EV debuted mid-2008 with some shocking statistics: a twin motor AESP producing 1,000 hp, 60 mph in a mere 2.5 seconds, and a top speed of 208 mph.
Shelby SuperCars already holds the distinction for the world’s fastest production car, the 2009 SSC Ultimate Aero (270 mph). While some of the claims for the new Aero EV seem outlandish, such as a 10 minute charge-time on a standard 110 outlet and a 150-200 mile range on a single charge, this doesn’t stop it from being the king of this list of high-performance machines.

2. The custom 1972 Electric Datsun: 0-60 mph in 2.95s

The 1972 Datsun pictured above inspired this list, after we posted about it recently. Ultimately, I wanted to see if this custom-mod was really the world’s fastest car, and it didn’t disapoint at 2nd place. From the outside, you wouldn’t expect a high-performance monster, but this thing rockets from 0 to 60 in 2.95 seconds, taking a quarter-mile in 11.46 seconds with a 114.08 mph trap speed. The top speed of the car is estimated to be 130 mph.
Unlike other cars on this list, the Datsun—even with expensive lithium-ion batteries—costs only $35,000.
See our last post on it (World’s Fastest Electric Car is a 1972 Datsun) or watch the video below.

3. Wrightspeed X1: 0-60 mph in 3.07s

We covered the X1 when it first debuted last year (see An Electric Car With Muscle: The 175 MPGe X1 Prototype by Wrightspeed Inc).
The X1 uses a 3-phase AC induction motor and inverter from AC Propulsion, which catapults it from 0-60 in 3.07 seconds. There’s no clutch, no shifting, and first gear will take you all the way to 112 mph. The electrical system is powered by lithium polymer batteries, which is a variation on lithium-based systems we’ve highlighted before. The X1 has a 100 mile range and reaches an overall equivalent of 175 MPG.
You can see the X1 smoke a Ferrari and a Porsche in this video:

4. L1X-75: 0-60 in 3.1 Seconds

The carbon-fiber, 600hp L1X-75 is a confusing case because we’re not sure it really exists. Apparently, Popular Mechanics writers discovered it at the 2007 New York auto show, quoting pickup of 0-60 in 3.1s and a top speed of 175 mph. They even had a video to prove it, which is (sadly) no longer available.
According to Motor Authority, the car was developed as a joint venture between Hybrid Technologies Inc. and Mullen Motor Company, which makes a gasoline version ranked as the 7th fastest American production car.
But if you take a look at the Hybrid Technologies website, all you’ll find is something called the LiV RUSH, which would be knocked off this list for taking 5s to get to 60mph. Mullen Motor’s website shows a GTEV with 0-60mph acceleration time of 4.5s.
If you know what happened to this car, please let us know. Otherwise, I’m going to exercise my creative license and leave this phantom at #4.

5. AC Propulsion tzero Roadster: 0-60 mph in 3.6s

The tzero (pronounced tee-zero) only needs 200 horsepower to rocket from 0 to 60 mph in 3.6 seconds, due to a light-weight body. Built by San Dimas, CA-based AC Propulsion, the car has apparently owned both Porsche 911s and Corvettes, and even a Ferrari F355 in 1/8-mile drag race.
AC Propulsion has apparently manufactured the car since 1997, starting with lead-acid batteries and then moving to lithium-ion which extended the range from 100 to about 300 miles per charge.
Don’t expect to see this one on the street: it’s a $220,000 prototype that probably won’t ever be more than a proof-of-concept.

6. Tesla Roadster: 0-60 mph in 3.9s

Tesla has been the darling of electric car afficionados for some time, mostly because they’ve produced a great car that is both available and, to some, affordable. Even though the Roadster’s top speed is electronically limited at 125 mph, it’s great to see it make a strong showing on this list with an acceleration of 0 to 60 mph in under 4 seconds.
Besides the roadster, Tesla has a sedan in the works (the Model S), which just debuted last week.
Check out the 248 peak horsepower output in this video (thanks Huddler):

7. Eliica: 0-60 mph in 4s

While it looks like something out of a bad scifi movie, the Eliica—even with 8 wheels—accelerates faster than a Porsche 911 Turbo. The Eliica (which stands for Electric Lithium-Ion Car) was built by a team at Keio University in Tokyo under the direction of the inventor, Hiroshi Shimizu.
Looks aren’t everything: the 640 hp eight-wheel drive hits 60 mph in 4 seconds and has been clocked at Italy’s Nardò High Speed Track at an impressive 230 mph. Under the right conditions, the Eliica team claims it could clear 250 mph.
Don’t expect to see this one anywhere. Price tag: $255,000 US

8. Rinspeed iChange: 0-60 mph in 4s

This is another concept car we profiled recently. Debuting at the 2009 Geneva Auto Show, the Rinspeed iChange has the unique distinction of actually being able to change it’s body shape to suit passengers numbers.
More importantly, it looks pretty badass, and can accelerate from 0-62 mph in just over four seconds, with a top speed of 137 mph. For more detail: Rinspeed iChange EV Changes Shape To Suit Passenger Numbers

9. Tango: 0-60 mph in 4s

Let me cut you off: I don’t believe it either. How can something that looks like this ever be taken seriously? Commuter Cars, the manufacturer of this vehicle, claims in all seriousness that this is the ‘world’s fastest urban car’.
Statistically speaking–if you take their word for it–this is true: 0-60mph in 4s and a top speed of 120mph. I’m not sure how this thing would bank sharp turns, though the company website said the Nascar roll cage is designed for 200mph crashes.
And yes, they do exist. George Clooney has one. Check out some really low-quality video here.
And check out everything you wanted to know in this 24-minute video:

10. Dodge Circuit EV: 0-60 in under 5s

This may be one of the more controversial cars on the list: the Dodge Circuit EV has been called little more than a re-badged Lotus toy, since it’s actually a retooled Lotus Europa. It’s also been called by our very own Jo Borras a “marketing exercise (at best) and a con (at worst).”
Whether that’s true or not, the prototype has a 268 hp electric that produces 480 lb-ft of torque and a reported top speed fo 120 mph.
The Circuit appeared at the 2009 Detroit auto show and could portend future electric models in Chrysler’s lineup (but don’t quote us on this).

Bonus: How does a High-performance Plug-in Hybrid Compare?

11. Fisker Karma: 0-60 in 5.8s

We wouldn’t feel good about keeping Fisker’s Karma, the highly-anticipated and high-performance plug-in hybrid, off the list. The Karma is really only a different beast in terms of range and recharging, since plug-in hybrids use an onboard generator to recharge their batteries.
So how does it compare? The Karma has two modes to accommodate different driving styles. It will do 0-60 in 5.8 seconds in ‘Sport Mode,’ with a top speed of 125 mph. In the more economical ‘Stealth Mode’ will hit 60mph only after 7.5 seconds and top speed of 95 mph.

That’s it! What did we forget?

Here’s the whole gallery:

: Shelby SuperCarsAero EV

: Tesla Roadster

: Eliica

: AC Propulsion tzero

: aero ev

: Aero EV

: Hybrid Technologies L1X-75

: Tango

: Dodge Circuit

Once again: THE ARTICLE SOURCE IS HERE

Donald Duck - Der Fuehrer's Face

2009-04-03T13:25:00.003-05:00

Kuroi Zero UnderNet - bit late :P

2009-04-02T22:05:00.001-05:00

Our prayers are finally answered: X9 is coming!!

... Well, how should we put it... our anonymous tipster fooled us. Way to go.

Thanks to you, the news got spread to these places:
Capcom Unity
Gamercafe (Chile)
MDRockman (Brazil)
Mega Man X9 Community
N-Philes
Rockman Network (Thailand)
Sonic Retro
Spriters Resource
Sprites INC
The Mega Mario Network

The tipster apologized and she sent us these messages from other authors.
* RMC at GoNintendo.com: "I'm pretty sure it's an April Fools' joke, but I'll keep my eyes open for more details..."
* Jeff at MegaManX9.com: "Hate to break it to you, but RPM does this every year for April Fool's day. Trust me I'd love it too!"

Maybe there was a reason behind this prank?

Quote from: 1UP Interview with MM9 producer Hironobu Takeshita

http://www.1up.com/do/feature?pager.offset=0&cId=3172027

1UP: "Will we ever be lucky enough to get a Mega Man X9 -- but with Super NES era graphics and music?"
HT: "It all depends on fans' demand! We might see that day, as long as there is passion!"

Oh well, guess we'll never know. The important thing is that everyone who commented had some good manners for once.

-- HAPPY LATE APRIL FOOL'S hahaha (This is just mean. I know)

YOUTUBE COMPILATION

2009-04-01T23:25:00.001-05:00

SURFERS FROM AROUND THE WORLD CONVENE ON THE SHORES OF ECUADOR

2009-03-28T03:58:00.000-05:00

Watch the LIVE Webcast Starting Tomorrow at Quiksilver.com/ISA

(Salinas, Ecuador) March 27, 2009 - The world's best junior surfers completed their arrival today in Ecuador for the start of the 2009 Quiksilver ISA World Junior Surfing Championship, an event recognized by the International Olympic Committee. The official event press conference was held this afternoon at Hotel Barcelo near the contest site.

“Welcome to Ecuador and to the most beautiful region of our country,” said Ana Trivino, Mayor of Salinas, Ecuador. “It is really special to see us as a country hosting a surfing event such as this. Surfing has been, in this area, a part of our culture and today we have the privilege of welcoming the best of the best to our country.”

“We are so pleased to have this spectacular event in Ecuador,” said Fernando Aguerre, President of the International Surfing Association. “I truly admire the relationship the country has with nature and I commend Ecuadorians for the changes they have made to make that relationship even better. The only thing contest organizers cannot control are waves and we received the great news today that the swell forecast for the next week and a half is looking really good.”

Fernando spent the morning hours surfing with many of the junior surfers in town for the competition. “I felt very fortunate not only to be in the water surfing this morning, but even more so to see all of the contestants together having fun and getting ready up for the contest.”

Starting tomorrow and spanning nine days, the Quiksilver ISA World Junior Surfing Championship will host 264 surfers, the most participants in the history of the event, from 28 nations and six continents as they compete for individual and team gold, silver, bronze and copper medals. The competition will be held at the famous La FAE Beach in Salinas, Ecuador.

This year marks the first time the competition has been held in a Hispanic American country. Started in 2003 and held in Durban, South Africa, the Quiksilver ISA World Junior Surfing Championship has set foot on the shores of nearly every continent. This year's competing countries include Argentina, Australia, Barbados, Brazil, Canada, Chile, Costa Rica, France, Germany, Great Britain, Guatemala, Hawaii, Ireland, Italy, Jamaica, Japan, Mexico, Morocco, New Zealand, Nicaragua, Peru, Portugal, Puerto Rico, South Africa, Tahiti, USA, Venezuela and Ecuador.

Participants in today's press conference included ISA President, Fernando Aguerre, Director of Ecuadorian Tourism Ricardo Camacho, Mayor of Salinas Ana Trivino, President of Ecuadorian Surfing Federation (FES) Manolo Lozano, ASP World Champion Martin Potter, 2007 Boys Under 16 Gold medalist Garrett Parkes, 2008 Girls Under 18 Gold medalist Laura Enever and Ecuadorian surf team member Jonathan Chila.

Quiksilver Young Gun Garrett Parkes from Australia will be looking to set a new ISA record in Ecuador. Having won gold in 2007 in the Under 16 division, Parkes could be the first-ever to win gold medals in two divisions if he clinches the top spot in the Under 18 division. Australian teammate and Roxy's Laura Enever has her eyes set on back-to-back gold medals – a feat only one other surfer in the history of the ISA has accomplished current ASP World Champion Stephanie Gilmore.

Parkes and Enever and the Australian team will be joined by all of the visiting countries tomorrow for the official Opening Ceremonies and Parade of Nations. The Parade begins at 5:00pm as the world's best junior surfers canvas the streets of Salinas. The competition will begin Sunday, March 29 at 8:00am.

For more information on the Quiksilver ISA World Junior Surfing Championship, LIVE webcast, photos and on-demand video highlights, visit www.quiksilver.com/isa.

Gold medallists in the Under 18 Boys and Girls division will receive entry spots in the ASP World Tour 2010 Quiksilver and Roxy Pro Gold Coast Trials to be held in Australia's Gold Coast from February 27 until March 10.

PHOTOS FOR PRESS
Daily rights-free high resolution images of the event will be available for worldwide press use at www.quiksilver-press.com (password available upon request)
VIDEO FOR PRESS
Daily high-resolution video sequences will be available for TV and web at www.quiksilver-press.com (password available upon request)
For further information please contact:
ISA Media Manager, Pablo Zanocchi: Pabloisasurf.org

Quiksilver Public Relation Manager, Tobias Coffman: Tobias.Coffmanquiksilver.com

Ecuadorian Media Coordinator, Ma. Luisa Noboa, Director of Axis Ecuador: mlnoboaaxisecuador.com

About the ISA
The International Surfing Association (ISA) is recognized by the International Olympic Committee (IOC) as the World Governing Authority for Surfing and all Surfriding activities, including Short Board, Longboard, Bodyboard, Kneeboard, Skimboard, Tow In and Stand Up Paddle surfing. It was originally founded as the International Surfing Federation in 1964 and has been running world championships since 1964 and the Junior World Championships since 1980.
ISA membership includes the surfing National Governing Bodies (NGBs) of over 50 countries on six continents. Its headquarters are located in La Jolla, California. It is presided by Fernando Aguerre, first elected in 1994 in Rio, and re-elected six times since. The ISA's four Vice Presidents are Alan Atkins (Australia), Robin de Kock (South Africa), Mike Gerard (USA), and Karin Sierralta (Peru).

About Quiksilver (www.quiksilver.com)
Quiksilver is committed to providing tools for uncovering, expressing and expanding your personal style. Our aim is to foster the sense of individual expression and excitement - the stoke that is the essence of boardriding*. We're also here to spread the word because the only thing better than finding stoke is sharing it.

* Boardriding is about timing and style. It's youthful, active, casual, and free flowing. There is no wrong way to ride a board. The goal is simply to learn, progress, improve, and give it your own interpretation.

District 9

2009-03-28T03:42:00.004-05:00

District 9 is an upcoming science fiction movie to be directed by Neill Blomkamp, and produced by Peter Jackson. The film is set for an August 14, 2009 release date. It takes place in Joburg, South Africa. This movie is set to be a stepping stone for Blompkamp for the Halo movie.

Not much is known about the movie's plot. It is, however, known to be based on Alive in Joburg, a short film (produced by Neill Blomkamp, Sharlto Copley, Simon Hansen and Shanon Worley; Sharlto Copley also portrayed one of the interviewed policemen) about aliens landing in Africa and becoming slaves/migrant workers. In the movie they are called the "Non-Humans" and are forced to work by the fictional company, Multi National United (MNU for short). It seems that MNU is quite racist, as they speak to Non-Humans in harsh tones and give them very little necessities, but do the opposite to humans. Throughout the film, the Non-Humans will try to free themselves from MNU's grasp. The film is a thinly veiled social commentary on the present day anti-Zimbabwean xenophobia found in many parts of South Africa, as well as the apartheid past of South Africa (recall District Six, Cape Town).

Groups/Characters

Humans- They are the humans.
Non-Humans- A race of aliens who are forced to be MNU's slaves. They are treated very poorly, and are put under arrest if trying to express freedom.
Multi National United- The company that "owns" all Non-Humans. They treat Non-Humans very harshly, but treat Humans with respect. They seem to be a racist company.
George- a Non-Human who works in District 9. He publishes the blog MNUSpreadsLies in an attempt to tell the world of MNU's mistreatment of the Non-Humans.

References

Also check out: Crossing the line. It's a short world war 2 film by the two directors. May be interesting to you guys eager to see battle in the Halo film. If they make it. Mirror here.