Labyrinths of Lahrah

Global Village 2012

2012-02-10T18:49:00.000+01:00

I flew back to India on February 1...the next day I had to fly to Chennai for the TCS-ACE Global Village. I and few others had the opportunity to attend this event twice. Most interns usually get to attend just 1. This year's event lacks the excitement, connection and zeal of last years but the energy was pretty much the same.

Below is a video of all the continents roll-call.

The Dishes

I can't remember which Country made this

The Making

♥ Lara from Incredible India

In Dubai for the week

2012-01-29T09:27:00.001+01:00

Landed in Dubai on the 26th.

Basically it is a lazy trip financed by my mother, I always wanted to visit Dubai but it was not on my list of 2012 must visit. Mum just called me up one day and said, she was in the airport seeing off her sister-in-law going off to Dubai. The next thing I heard, would you like to visit the country and the awoof loving me said yes immediately.

I must say even though Dubai is really beautiful, it lacks the wow effect of Kuala Lumpur in my mind. The magnificent architectures is what Dubai has going for it. So far, I have been to the Mall of the Emirates, spent just 5 minutes there, hooked up with my friend and we left. Dubai Mall which is besides the Burj Khalifa, the world's tallest building, The gate of the Burj Al-arab(the only 7 star hotel in the world), you are not allowed in without reservation. The Atlantis resort. My host and her friends took me to the cinema last night and we watched the Journey 2. Tomorrow, I am off to for the Desert Safari and the beach.

Thinking Dubai would be hot, I came with only a pair of jeans. The black jacket, I came with was because it is cold in Hyderabad and I left for the airport directly from work. Dubai is terribly cold, even the weather in Hyderabad is better. My jacket is more or less useless but better than, having no jacket at all. Even with the Sun during the day, it is cold.

The Burj Khalifa

Nice to run into these boys again

At the Radisson Royal Hotel, seeing off one of the guys to the airport

♥ Lara from Dubai

Occupy Nigeria: so is this the way forward?

2012-01-17T04:07:00.001+01:00

I am numb and speechless. I have never believed in the credibility of the NLC/TUC, but I sure did not expect them to go down so cheaply. Over 16 lives has been lost to this struggle, they were wasted for their parents. All for what, N44 reduction, still I am speechless not for lack of what to say but because the words are stuck in my mouth with no direction. This piece better still says a little of the thoughts running in my head.

This piece was shared by an old secondary school mate of mine by name Ayorinde Ade-Bello...
----------------

In the past few days I have expressed the opinions of others including these next words credited to Fela Durotoye. FD has surpassed everyone in "mirroring" my sentiments and I strongly believe that we need and have what it takes to make this possible at ALL costs. I have placed the points I want to emphasize in separate paragraphs.

You will not understand till you read to the very end. Here goes..........

I am so angry that precious lives have been lost as ordinary citizens protested against an unjust policy that was clearly not thought-through and yet, our President describes these fallen heroes as the "adverse effects" of the protest. I am angry that our President made so many open-ended promises without clear deliverables or deadlines and thought we would be gullible and simple-minded enough to say OK. I am so angry that in a hard-earned democratic dispensation, our elected officials went into the barracks and cantonments to invite the very same soldiers (who we fought to return to the barracks) unto the streets against unarmed protesters while armed bandits, militants and terrorists express themselves freely without being muzzled by the military might of our government. But then I am also very sad because I've watched this charade play out itself many times before (without the novelty of the military and the militants.) Like I articulated in my facebook message (of January 5, 2012,) on this issue of fuel subsidy removal, this script has been acted out too many times for us to have forgotten how the charade ends. Act 1 Scene 1: Government (hints but) suddenly announces the increase in the pump price of petroleum products. Act 1 Scene 2: The people are angry about Government feeble excuses and explanations asking people to pay more because they can't confront the corrupt system that makes it unsustainable to keep fuel prices low . Act 2 Scene 1: Organised labour and trade union sense that it is time to bring out the capes and harken to the people's cry for super-heroes. You know the rest of the story... don't you? Government gets a court injuction restraining labour from embarking on a strike. Labour disobeys the unjust injunctions and go out to exercise their constitutional rights to call an unemployed populace to mass action. The youth, the homeless, the poor and the unemployed come out en-mass and protest. Labour makes public declarations of the position of the people. Government invites labour to closed door meetings.

Something (we call negotiation) happens behind the closed doors. Labour emerges from closed door meetings and declares a deadlock.

Govt goes ahead to REDUCE but NOT REVERSE pump price.

Labour suspends strike.

Employers are happy to get their staff back to work.

Everybody gets back on the Rat Race (All motion, No Movement...I think the better way to put it is win-win!!! The only people that lose and suffer are the poor and unemployed who we all said would lose more if we continue the struggle against pump price increments.

We never go 'backward' to collect our stolen funds from the corrupt officials and the cabals well known to the government. Rather, we choose to go 'forward' to rob our poor, feeble and voiceless forever and forget them until its time to bring them out to 'negotiate' another unjust policy.

So we are back to where it all began... ASUU continues its strike and no one notices the degenerating young minds wasting away in our homes and on our streets.

LASU school fees still increased by 900% and admission now costing 250,000 Naira for newly admitted students seeking an education to prepare their minds for the future.

The Nigerian Medical Association and doctors must now return back to their death centers (oops.. I meant health centers) and continue to watch helplessly as hopeless patients die from preventable systemic decay rather than the diseases that brought them to the hospital.

Some of us will now go back to the LEKKI TOLL GATES and continue to pay toll, since we now have protest-fatigue. In any case, no one remembers why we were fighting against the unjust tolling of a road that was built by LKJakande with tax payers money and now refurbished by concessionaires. What's the big deal? Let the government continue to collect our taxes to build other roads and we continue to pay tolls to drive on our own (sorry...LCC's) road.

Really...I am sad and angry because after all said and done, nothing has changed... Except for the price of fuel from 65 to 97Naira per liter.

Still no refineries, no good roads, no power, no portable water, corrupt officials still in office as they continue 'partnering' with their cabals. Investigations without conclusion. Accusations without prosecution. And the world keeps going round and round. So when is real change going to come?

As I stated in my earlier message on Jan 5, 2012, the change we need is not just policy. It is in the quality of mind and persons at policy making positions. Without a doubt, our change will come the day our Brightest and Best minds silently RESOLVE that Enough is Enough of mediocrity in policy-making positions and begin to prepare to occupy positions (and not just parks) through the electoral process.

So how will we effectively deliver sustainable desired-change?

WE NEED A CRITICAL MASS OF NEW NIGERIANS TO TAKE HOLD OF EVERY LEVEL OF POLICY MAKING POSITIONS BY 2015.

Not a few good men and women whose voices will get drowned in the cacophony of mediocrity. Let our brightest and best brains begin serious preparations NOW.

Don't wait till 2014 to decide you want to make a change by running for office in 2015. It will be too late if you don't start NOW!!!!

As we keep up the pressure for good governance, let another set of emerging leaders (with a heart for the nation and a love for the people) arise and begin to prepare for 2015.

We must encourage, train, mentor and empower the right people to go where few dare.

I have committed my life to raise and prepare as many exemplary leaders of excellence to take over the various policy making positions at all levels of governance (federal, state and local)- executive and legislative. This is only the beginning of a long and arduous journey.

The real Nigerian spring is going to be in April 2015. Until we change the quality of people in policy-making positions, we won't yet have real and lasting victory. Don't get it twisted...

The 2015 elections is going to be the opportunity for the real Nigerian Spring. The real question is ...Will we be ready to bring the real change we've always desired with the same zeal and fervor as we show now?

Please don't let today's passion die tomorrow.

The struggle continues today, tomorrow and forever. We WILL deliver the future!

(My opinion) - I know this struggle may last today and tomorrow, I desperately hope it does not last forever. My children must not meet this struggle.

I will not go and seek refuge in another's land. I will pray, act and empower others, (the illiterates and learned alike) do all that I can. We can make it happen, individually and collectively, 2015 is realistic, it can signal the beginning of change.

Till then, I will OCCUPY NIGERIA!!!
--------------------
♥ Lara from Incredible India

Occupy Nigeria: Which way my country?

2012-01-15T19:51:00.005+01:00

So the strike continues tomorrow. The Federal Govt. has refused to hear the voice of the masses. They are accusing the Opposition of inciting the masses to protest. Can someone please teach President Jonathan, the basic of the Democracy. What is the relevance of the opposition, if not to oppose autocratic policies of the ruling Party. I hear He has ordered the arrest of Femi Falana, Tunde Bakare, Dino Melaye And Shehu Sanni (Not sure how true this is)

The American Embassy has advised its citizens and get ready for evacuation if strike persists till Friday 20th of January, is our Nation on the verge of a Civil War as predicted by Prof Wole. Soyinka?.

Does the President think, Nigerians are so stupid and docile. What GEJ and his Cabal fail to realise is that everyone has a breaking point no matter how resilient a person might be. Nigerians have gotten to that breaking point. We are tired of suffering and smiling. Like I have always told some friends, Nigeria is a time bomb waiting to explode, the subsidy removal was just the catalyst.

Now we need to demand good governance, basic infrastructure, security (most importantly), cut in Government waste, accountability of every Public Office holder. I am appalled by the Nigerian 2012 budget.

I bet before this year 90% of Nigerians never knew or bother to know the contents of Nigerian Budget. I for one have never bothered to know beyond the figures they quote in the media. Thanks to the social media, most of us are now aware of the wastefulness of our Government.

I have read tweet and arguments of Pro-Subsidy supporters and I just shake my head at the stupidity of most of them.

I am happy that Nigerians have decided to give up the siddon look attitude we have always been known for and decided to change the future of our Land. I am glad, Nigerians have looked beyond the ethinic and religious differences and decided to fight for the future of our children. Thank you, everyone who has taken to the streets to protest for the future of our land. Thank you, everyone who cannot make it to the streets but are supporting the protest through the social media and their own best possible.

We need to teach our government that we know exactly what democracy is about and even though most of our votes are rigged, democracy still remains for the people and by the people.

I fell in love with Aduke's voice the first time, I listed to her song 'lekeleke'...I must say she is good and this song is so on point.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Xenophobia: The Fear and hatred of Nigerians

2012-01-08T22:12:00.005+01:00

I remember listening to this song in August and starting this post then, but I got carried away by Ramadhan then. This post has been lying in my drafts ever since.

I really would not have been remembered this post or this video, but lately I have observed a lot of Nigerian dissing by other African countries especially the Eastern Africans. Yesterday I got into an FB fight with some dumbminded Ugandan. Generally, I stay off FB fights, I don't even bother to comment on some of the crap I see on that network. I don't even know what entered my head. This idiot is also an intern with TCS but he is in Mumbai. Once he posted a link of the Nigerian police arresting a goat on the program's Group, one of his country man cautioned him so no one even made an issue on the matter. He obviously does not know we are with the same company because I saw his tweets accusing the dude with the post for telling on him about his nationality. What he does not know is that his friend is my flatmate and even though I do not interact with most of them, I know all the African interns in TCS. My flatmate told me not to waste my energy on him as he particularly hates Africa and I guess he believes India is his gateway to a brilliant future.

Like, they don't even hide their open hatred for Nigerians, they are the ones quick to assume and accuse Nigerians of every crime ever committed by a black man. These Nigerians, Those Nigerians, The Nigerians...all these you hear from Black, Non-Nigerians. I am just sick and tired of all their accusations. The other day, one of the interns from Benin Republic said all the crimes in his beloved country were all committed by Nigerians. I partially blame Nollywood for this nonsense. I mean these people watch the Nigerian movies more than we do. They expect us to be ritualist, scam them and thanks to movies like blackberry babes, some of them believe the girls are all the same.

People have always asked me why I particularly stick to only Nigerians in this country, it is for reasons like this. Most of them ignorantly make statements which are so far from true. I have told them that while they sit, point fingers and hate on Nigerians, We continue to move on and grow.

I am more at risk of xenophobia from a fellow African who is also black due to my nationality than racism due to the colour of my skin.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Happy New Year

2011-12-31T19:30:00.001+01:00

It's a wrap for us in India, bye bye 2011...welcome 2012

We will open the books. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called 'Opportunity' and its first chapter is New Year's Day.

~Edith Lovejoy Pierce.

I am grateful for a fresh new slate to start a new year,I am grateful for the healthy strong body, I am grateful for family that share my journey, I am grateful for life, for laughter , for friendship, for quiet moments to reflect on the beauty of nature and the crazy planet our world has become.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Ladies in white

2011-12-29T18:13:00.001+01:00

Ladies: White
Men: Black

Reads the team-lead's mail. I replied begging her to allow me wear white shoes as I do not have a white shirt or dress. Turns out the shoe I thought was white is nude. The cream jacket I was banking on is now too small for me. I bought the jacket 4months ago, I see I am now gradually getting fat.

All the ladies turned up to the office in white today for the New Year's party. I was so far away from white in my green, gold and black ensemble.

Spent Christmas eve with few of the interns who were around in Hyderabad. Most of the interns are travelling during the holiday, most to the North.

Nigeria, Tunisia, Not sure, Mexico, Nigeria, Mauritius and

Brazil

Hong Kong, Nigeria, Mexico

Spent Christmas day roaming Hyderabad with an Hong Kong colleague and her friend visiting from Mumbai

I am not one for New Year resolutions, I don't even bother with them. I just go with the flow of the year and whatever it brings. Looking forward to the New Year, praying for another beautiful year and pleasant surprises.
Happy New Year in advance guys.
♥ Lara from Incredible India

In my Life

2011-12-23T20:15:00.000+01:00

There are places I'll remember
All my life though some have changed
Some forever not for better
Some have gone and some remain

All these places had their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall
Some are dead and some are living
In my life I've loved them all

Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life I love you more.

The Beatles, "In my life"

Thank you all for reading my stories, my rants and most importantly for sharing my world.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

1 Year in India

2011-12-18T20:36:00.000+01:00

On the 15th of Dec made it one year I landed in the incredouble land called India.
It has not been easy, don't mind all those pictures of me jumping all around, all those tweets and bbm status.
To survive in India; one needs emotional and mental stamina, especially the emotional stamina.
I remember the early days when I got so frustrated and wanted to just pack up my load and go back to Naija.

I remember my state of mind when writing the Cultural Difference: Definition of communication post. I have come a really long way from that period. Then I could not have even imagined myself extending for 6more months on my team. Going home in May and I would say this has been a life changing experience for me.

I wrote an article on my Indian journey in the Afroelle Magazine. Please read my story Hyderabad Life: The City of Pearls here: bit.ly/tjwClV

Christmas is in one week, but there is no single sign here, we do not even have any holiday. Merry Christmas in advance everyone. May the new year bring us many more joy, pleasant surprises and good health.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Wonders of Hyderabad: Chowmahalla Palace

2011-12-14T09:51:00.000+01:00

360 days in India, I finally get to visit this Palace on Saturday which I found out is just behind the Chaminar. The Chowmahalla Palace was completed in 1869 and I must say this is the only monument I have seen in India which is still as good as new with its beauty still intact.

The Chowmahalla Palace or Chowmahallat (4 Palaces) belonged to the Nizams (Former Monarchy) of the Hyderabad State. It was the seat of the Asaf Jahi dynasty and was the official residence of the Nizam.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

FRRO BONDING

2011-12-09T21:28:00.001+01:00

My Visa Extension turned me into a regular customer at the FRRO office in Hyderabad.
I ran into old faces, new faces, made new friends, got toasted self.
Particularly interesting are my African brothers and sisters. They immediately jump into conversation with you simply because you are black, not stopping a minute to know if you are actually interested in the conversation or not.

I could tell the Nigerians apart from every other black community from the moment I set my eyes on them. The Nigerian swag can never be mistaken. With heads held up high, nose turned up, sometimes with amusement in his eyes and sometimes with utter disgust, the Nigerian observes his surrounding.

Everyday, people whine and complain about India, everyday the FRRO office is filled with citizens of the world coming to register as new entrants, extend almost expired and sometimes already expired visas and every other visa related issues. You have no business with the FRRO if you will be in India for less than 180days, so everyone who comes to that office plans to stay longer in the country. India is fast becoming an educational hub for IT professionals or wannabes. You find a lot of Chinese coming to study English in India, the Arab nation is also well represented. You find most Northern and Eastern (the Tanzanians are dominating India) studying here also. The Nigerian community is relatively small, but they are still a sizeable number.

On my first visit to the FRRO, I went to find out details of the Visa extension process. The official did not even waste mouth in telling to carry my head straight to the Ministry of Home Affairs (FRRO division) for extension. On my way out, some Hausa boy followed me to the bus-stop, He shall did introduction and all, collected my number...the boy call tire I no gree pick up call after our meeting.

One day, a guy came in to get his exit permit and upon opening the passport the officials found out that the entry visa expired 3years back. He had been living in India for the past 5years on an entry visa for 2years, I did not get the exact country but he is from one of them Arabian countries. The official was dumbfounded and did not know what to do for a very long time had his mouth wide open. Imagine that was one African especially Nigerian, na for police cell he go find himself before explanation.

I was in New Delhi from 10-13th of November, I must say I fell in love with the Nation's Capital. New Delhi is beautiful, despite all the crime story, I know it is a city I can live in if I had a choice. My trip to New Delhi was an all expense paid by the coy. New Delhi is actually far from Hyderabad, it is 27hours by train and 2hours by air. I had planned to go directly to the MHA office from the airport but unfortunately for me, there was some sort of Public holiday in Delhi on that day. I spent most part of the day sleeping, then buzzed up some friends who gave me directions to some of the tourist attractions in the state. I had dinner with a Mauritian ex-TCS intern who was leaving India the next day. Later that night, I attended her farewell party in a club called Zook in the Saket area of Delhi.

The next day, I was in the MHA as early as 8 for my extension interview. I was actually expecting to spend the whole day in the office but to my surprise I was out of there in less than 1hour. I had planned a trip to Agra which is about 3hours from Delhi the next day, but I woke up sick the next morning.I spent the day holed up in the hotel room with no friend or place to go to. In Delhi, I ran into a lot of Africans, particularly Nigerians. Some dude even immediately started speaking French to me, assuming I was from one of them French-Speaking African Countries. I guess there is a way, we as Nigerians identify each other, without even saying a word. All the Nigerians I met, I could tell from afar were Nigerians and immediately starts speaking Pidgin or just stop me and say, you are Nigerian abi.

The Visa extension process was not even as straightforward as I had thought. After my interview, I was told to go back to Hyd and await their decision. The decision was supposed to be sent directly to the FRRO number and I was to show my application number to the officials in Hyd and I shall be informed of the MHA's decision. I was fed up at some point, everyday something was needed, I had to get a new rent contract, change my address, landlord had to be physically present at their office to confirm that I am living in the said flat. I finally got my extension stamped 2 days before the entry visa was to expire.

In the process of all this wahala, I met this Iraqi, whose cousin had also attended the visa interview with me in Delhi. He is studying Bio-genetic something something,conversation with him was really good. He came to visit and sat with me all through the day I went for my visa stamping. We went on identifying people, I telling him which part of Africa, if I could not guess their exact countries and he identified all the Arabians. We talked about Saddam and govt of our countries. I was careful when threading Saddam Hussein's issue, I don't want anyone getting offended by my comments, because I can so misyarn sometimes. We met once for lunch on one of my lazy weekends, but I started giving my self brain when I heard "I would like to cook for you in my flat". Biko, hunger no do me reach that level. I know I have a prejudiced mind, but really I am just careful with everyone here even with my fellow Nigerians. I cannot talk ngbati ngbati story.

Pictures from Delhi:

My room at the Parkland Hotel

Red Fort

The cycle rickshaw

The Jama Masjid (Mosque)

India Gate

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Association of Nigerians in Hyderabad

2011-12-06T20:12:00.002+01:00

I was persuaded to attend the Nigerians living in Hyderabad meeting which took place on Nov 27th, 2 Saturdays back a day before the scheduled meeting. I ran into some Nigerians at an Ugandan Intern's farewell dinner and they sha will not let me rest until I agreed to come for the meeting. Instead of me to have jejely continue my sleep after the marathon, I carried my legedis benz to the Nigerian quarters here in Hyd.

The meeting was supposed to discuss the issues Nigerians face here in Hyd and particularly to elect new representatives for the state of Andhra Pradesh. Lets just say Nigerians been Nigerians, no election took place, in short nothing was achieved. All we had was people ranting, and people trying to beat each other up.

A couple of weeks ago, it was in the newspaper that some Nigerians were caught with fake credit cards and it was written that most of the scammers come into India disguised as student when they are actually committing crimes. Investigations revealed that the guys caught were actually Cameroonians who were in possession of the Nigerian passport. Their records at the FRRO (Foreigner Regional Registration Office) brought this part of their actual citizenship to light, but no one came back to correct the mistake in the newspaper.

Whenever a crime is committed in Hyd, in India in general by a black person, Nigeria is the first name on their lips. I read of a case where some female student accused a Nigerian of introducing her to drugs in a party. I am not saying my people are entirely innocent, but really proper investigation needs to be done before making such accusations. The Indians are refusing to rent their flats to Nigerians. Black Boys are getting stopped on the road by the police and if you do not have proper documentation on you at moment, especially if you now happen to be a Nigerian, drugs is the first thing you' re are searched for.

I have really never encountered any of this harassment before, but this was one of the issues which was supposed to be trashed out at the meeting.

The week before, someone called for a meeting and few people showed up, infact 80% of the people who showed up on the 27th were not at the previous meeting. Election was held that day and some people were selected. The election was annulled because some people complained that there was no proper representation. I heard ish such as the Hausas were not represented, the Yorubas dominated the meeting, people from some areas were not present, bla bla bla.

There was also the issue of the past executives, of which the erstwhile president was silently been accused of embezzlement or should I even call it mismanagement of funds. The disputed amount is said to be 27350 INR which is 90255NGN on a exchange rate of 3.3NGN to 1INR.

According to the agenda prepared which was shared for everyone, election was suppose to take place first then every other business. They sha dabarued everything and we all sha found ourselves discussing issue number 2. I swear I have never seen any magomago like this before. The erstwhile president who has practically done nothing for long time, said he was resigning and by the power vested on him, handed over power to his Vice President. The Vice President too, feeling power hungry was so happy to be wielding his power anyhow. Everyone started arguing left, right, centre. Some wanted the election to hold, majority did not even understand what the hell was happening and I was one of them. 70% were there to make sure no election takes place. I swear the meeting felt like an SUG meeting. Everyone wanted to talk, some people were shouting others opinion down. This our yeye habit of nobody is better than me, nobody can tell me what to do was very much in display.

After 4hours of ranting, meeting was adjourned till last Sunday with nothing achieved. Thank God, I did not waste my energy to attend the meeting this last Sunday because I was informed it was still same crap and still no election or way forward for anything.

All I can say is Nigerians, I hail thee.

N.B: I got my visa extended, I have not had internet for the last 2weeks and also just moved flats....everything has been crazy lately but all settled now.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Hyderabad10k run...every steps counts

2011-11-27T16:22:00.001+01:00

Today I took part in the Hyderabad 10km marathon more like 9km for we corporate runners. I heard about the marathon a while back, but really never paid attention to it as I was not even sure I would be in India till now.

Few days back, a colleague asked if I was interested in the match and I just absent-mindedly said yes. I actually did not even register till Wednesday.

So Today, I went off with friends to represent TCS at the marathon. Okay, it was more of walking for us than running. the koko of the gist is that I sha completed the 10k walk/marathon. Right now my legs ache, but the joy of the event is definitely worth the pain. Looking forward to the Mumbai marathon in Jan/Feb next year. At least I have enough time to prepare for that and I just might do the professional run, time will tell about that.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Chandigarh Life: Laura Nwabia

2011-11-14T17:01:00.004+01:00

"India is what we want it to be for us, no country is perfect so the best thing is to make the most out of any condition or place you find yourself in"

Awesome! That’s what I said when I got to the airport in Delhi, compared to the airport back home, it was really beautiful and organized. When I got out of the airport, then it finally hit me that I was in India, as I saw white and brown people working around and speaking Hindi, it was the weirdest thing ever. Also, I was confused and didn’t know where to go to, even though my friend who been in the country before had given me the 411 on how to find my way to Chandigarh; my final destination. I came to India for an internship program through an organization called AIESEC which gives undergraduates and recent graduates the opportunity to acquire international working experience.

While I was standing outside the airport with my big luggage, initially I was scared because I didn’t understand the language and few of them spoke English. I had to take a metro bus to Chandigarh but out of frustration I got into a bus to Delhi instead of a straight bus from the airport to Chandigarh. In Delhi I experienced a bigger frustration with my really big luggage (Lord knows why I packed all those stuff).

At a conference in Chandigarh

So I was dropped in Delhi bus stand, still confused and I saw a police man and I walked up to him , luckily for me he understood English a little and I swear, I heard angels sing halleluiah . While I was talking to the policeman something strange happened a group of people gathered around me and were just staring at me like I was an alien, if I wasn’t Nigerian, I would have taken to my heels screaming. But I kept my cool as well as handle the situation and my dreadlocks were a major attraction. There I was feeling happy I found a police, not knowing the police man was trying to make money out of me. He called his friend told me he will drop me in Chandigarh as a Naija girl I asked how much and the man said “6000 rupees mam” and I said there was no way in hell I was going to pay that amount to get to Chandigarh because my friend had already told me it was 350 rupees with bus.

Black out in Chandigarh

The police man now said “special, special mam” And I said special my arse and when they saw I was not smiling I think they got scared and left one by one .In my confused and really sweaty state, I just sat down on the pavement thinking of what next to do and a good Samaritan came along and the best thing about this good Samaritan was that he could speak fluently, that moment, again I swear I heard sweet voices singing alleluia.

In the club

I explained my predicament to this young man and he helped me call the person responsible for my intern ship, after they finished talking for good 15minutes ,he then helped me with my luggage and put me in the bus going to Chandigarh, he even paid my bus fare as well as give me his card to call him when I’ve gotten to my destination .though I wasn’t sure if I was heading the right way ,the young man was like “don’t worry it’s ok”, I was still scared but coming from Nigeria I took a chance.

Eclipse night

Much to my surprise, after 7 hours drive and people looking at me as if I was an alien I got to Chandigarh and stopped at the right place (sector 17 bus stand), where I saw the Romanian friend of a friend of mine who used to be an intern in the same city. I was so glad to see a normal person, who related to me normally. Though the AIESECERS wanted me to do an home stay (where one is required to stay with an India family for some days) I know it was all part of the integration process, but I was so not interested because when I went to the intern house I met other cool people from different countries and I felt more at home and comfortable there, so I stayed there for two days and it was fun. After two days, the AIESECERS came to pick me from the house and took me to where my own flat, which was in sector 51 and closer to where I was going to be working.

Where I lived

I noticed the Indians who were AIESECERS behaved normally and were from rich homes but most of the Indian guys had one thing in common they all wanted to have sex and were crazy about white women, as my friend from brazil said “Indian men are all over white girls like mosquitoes “which was true because strangely the mosquitoes were more interested in biting the white people.

Shopping with friends at the Sector 22 market.

I got to my place of work and met other Indians who worked there, they were mostly girls and later on I got to understand why. Naturally in life I got to understand that “never show people how good you are, unless they will either exploit or plot your downfall” and thank I knew this, that’s was how I survived for six months in my work place. I also got to realize that Indians worked so hard and got so little at the end of the month, little wonder most of them preferred to be expatriates, where they get better pay and treatment. Unfortunately not many of the interns knew what I knew so they were exploited, people like Chelsea form USA, Stepnie and Matt from Canada, Bibi from Brazil, Katty from Germany, Dominika and Alicja from Poland.However, they all got frustrated and quit one after the other , while I was having fun and working in my own pace, at the end of the day only Dominika and I completed the internship as well as leaving the company on a good note.

Agra

During my 7 months stay in India I worked as a freelance writer and got extra money to spend. I also got to travel to so many places and I can say that was the peak of my experience in India, because I love traveling a lot. Lucky for me, Chandigarh was a good location from which one could use to travel to other parts of Northern India. I got to visit the golden temple in Amritsar, which was a beautiful experience at night the temple looked like something from Walt Disney.

Sweets

I went for rafting and yoga with Chelsea in Rishekesh and that was my best trip ever because there were lots of foreigners there and I did not feel weird like I always did in Chandigarh and instead of being looked at like an alien more people looked at me with admiration because of my dreads and there were lots of hippies there. After, Rishekesh I went to Agra, where I got to see Taj Mahal (the symbol of love) and it was a very beautiful sit in and out. One thing that frustrated me in India was the way they exploited foreigners, they always wanted to make 100% profit from foreigners. The Indians got to pay 20 rupees to get into Taj Mahal while foreigners paid 750 rupees, imagine! When shopping it was the same thing.

Rafting in Rishikesh

Being a girl from Nigeria, I got street wise very fast and got use to the environment .moreover, what the Indians see on tv plays a huge role in the way they behave, and owing to this most of my white friends were harassed by some Indians because they believed they were loose people , who were only interested in sex.

Conference Faci team in Jaipur

As the months went by I met a lot of people from different countries, Ukraine, Canada , USA, Mexico, Brazil, Poland, UK, Portugal, Mauritius, Hungary just to mention a few . One sad thing about an internship is that people come and go; the goodbyes were always the saddest part. However, I kept on traveling, I went to Jaipur as an international facilitator, I toured the place and it is a beautiful place. I went to Daramsala, Shimla , Ludiana and Monali which had other places to travel to in the city. One year is not enough to travel all over India, but I tried.

shopping in Shimla

Daramshala

Golden Temple, Amritsar

During my last week in India my friends had a going away party for me, and two of my friends Stephnie from Canada and Dodjin from the Netherlands. it was so sad I could not believe I was going back home but at the end of the day it was a wonderful experience, two things I was going to miss in India ,were my friends and the trips. lastly I got to realize that India is what we want it to be for us, no country is perfect so the best thing is to make the most out of any condition or place you find yourself in, which is what I did and that’s why I can say I had fun in India despite the country’s short comings.

Farewell dinner

Farewell Party

------

Laura Nwabia was a Content Writing Intern with TechWorks India in Chandigarh. She studied English at the University of Lagos.

Senior Citizens of India

2011-11-08T15:24:00.001+01:00

Today, I had to give my seat to a senior citizen of India.
I did not even realize there was a senior citizen section in the bus. I know of the female and male section, disabled people's section. But Senior Citizen section, I was dumbfounded. I had to look around me and realised the people sitting around me were actually all old people. I jejely stood up and had to stand for a long part of the journey.

When the man had said "excuse me, miss", I had looked at him with bad eye and wondered why he was disturbing me and drawing aware my gaze from the book I was reading. When he noticed, I did not understand what he meant, then he said, Senior citizen's section.

I was actually mad, not really because I had to stand but because the man is really not so old, but he realized that was the only way he could get me off the seat. Also the man was not even in the bus for long, and the seat went to some lady is came into the bus later.

enough of my whining, I admire the fact that they actually have respect for their older generation. I can only imagine any one telling me that in Naija. I would only get up for an old person because I feel like it, not because some one will now use the old person ish oh me.
_____________

The only thing delaying my visa extension now is electricity bill. I do not have a copy of the flat I registered at the FFRO with, all documents are ready. I requested to change the address to my current address. I was told to go get my rental agreement and also inform my landlord to come and sign at their Hyd office. Without the landlord, no address change will be allowed and without that extension is not possible. I give it to India and bureaucracy, every thing is by the letter. I hope to sort all these ish out by tomorrow, the story is getting too long for me.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

I miss Lasgidi

2011-11-06T19:56:00.002+01:00

I have spent the last 2 days holed up in my room. I have not stepped outside my flat since Friday night. Today is Sallah and I have my phone switched off because I do not want to read or listen to my family and friends tell me how much I am missing.

I miss home, I miss my family. I miss celebrating festivals and joys with my family.
But a part of me is not ready to go home. I have not even discussed with my family the possibility of returning home in 2weeks if my visa extension does not work out. I want my visa extension to work out, but a part of me is already doing countdowns. I know my next step, staying longer or leaving in 2weeks does not change that.

I miss Lagos, I miss the noise, I miss the madness, I just do not think I am ready for Lasgidi no matter how much I miss it now.

We were 5

2011-10-31T15:32:00.005+01:00

Jose, Kristina, I, Fernando and Sandra

We were 5, now we are 2 left.
Yesterday Sandra left, leaving Kristina and I in the incredouble land.
Jose always talked about how he would be the last one standing and we all thought Fernado would surely be the one. He is the only none intern who was a permanent staff with Norvartis, but he was the first to leave. He got employed in Norvatis Brazil and had to go back home. Jose started another internship TCS Hungary.

My Visa expires in the next 23days, I am still dragging my feet about extending...besides that, I hear it is difficult to extend in Hyderabad, most visa extensions are turned down... One thing I am certain of for now is that I am going back to school next year, where exactly it will be is still an issue. For now, I am checking out schools and hoping I get to study in the country of my choice.

It has been a roller-coaster year...these last 10months has been wonderful, challenging and pretty much crazy. With these people I have lived, dined, partied, and travelled, tThe flat is not empty without them We have become family and my year and past shall never be written without them in it.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Travelogue: Goofing around Mumbai and Alibag

2011-10-17T18:52:00.002+01:00

I was in Mumbai for the 4th time in the first week of October. There was some festival on the 6th which was work-free and I got 7th off as leave. Like all my trips to Mumbai, I had nothing planned. Knowing the people I was going to meet, I did not bother my self to make any plans and also most of the interns in Mumbai were off to Goa. I just goofed around the city, from the Mohammed Ali Market to Marine drive and the 1hour trip to Alibag on a Jetty.

I lost and found my camera in Alibag. If that scenario had happened in Mumbai or Hyderabad, it would have been goodbye to the camera. The people of Alibag are pretty much honest, helpful and very kind.

I climbed and came down over 5000stairs on a 900feet hill just to go see the Kanakeshwar Devasthan Temple. The temple was really not the attraction for me but the climb. I pushed myself, almost gave up, stopped many times just to get to the top of the hill. On my way to the top, I saw a really old woman and some little girl coming down the stairs and I was informed that she like the other people I saw actually lives up the hill. Imagine having to climb such stairs daily, no need for gym.

Did I mention I hate Mumbai, that city is worse than Lagos, okay scrap that I still cannot decide which is worse. If one can survive in Mumbai for 3months, even living in Lagos will be child's play.

Inside the Female section of Mumbai Train

I finally got a seat

The crew

Off to Alibag

The climb to the Kanakeshwar Devasthan Temple

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Travelogue-Bangalore (The Garden City)

2011-09-26T18:50:00.003+01:00

I was in the Bangalore for the weekend with my fellow Nigerians and our wonderful Cameroonian host, Pascal. Bangalore is probably the only Indian City where one will run into many Africans on the street. Even though, Bangalore is so organized, I still love my Hyderabad. The clubs in the city close at 11.30pm, and the clubs require dancing license for people to be able to dance. Never heard of dancing license till I got to Bangalore.

Bangalore is not a city of natural resources or aesthetic monuments or Temples...all these the city makes up for with remarkable architectural designs. My eyes took most of the pictures than my camera.

Aldo

Chinedu, I, Pascal (Our host) and Feran

Olio Lounge

65ft Shiva statue

Colour blocking/riot any one join

Ulsoor Lake

Getting our the dolls

Partially put together, auto rickshaw aka keke Napep

Off to the club

I burnt my feet at the temple and I was told slippers was not allowed in the club so had to wear Pascal canvas which was definitely not my size.

Brigade street

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Who is training our boys???

2011-09-19T18:17:00.003+01:00

Who is training our boys,
Who is there to mould them into morally conscious leaders of tomorrow?
Who is investing in mentoring our boys?
What are we doing to our young men?

No one is there to guide them any more
No one to discipline them any more,
No one is there to teach our boys to be the leaders we require tomorrow.

Mothers have failed them, the society has forsaken them. They have no one to turn to and they have found solace is different kind of vices.

Our boys have become rapist, murderers, armed robbers, paedophiles, fraudsters. Our boys are completely lost and confused, they have become lazy and are weaklings of their own emotions.

We all heard the story of the rape, how five boys raped a girl for over an hour and recorded it, passed it on to their friends and people have sat down to waste one hour of their live watching the agony of a girl, mocking the sorrow of someone's daughter.

Rape on our campuses is not a new thing in Nigeria, particularly this manner of rape. The doom of the boys was that they recorded it and hopefully the girl will get justice is this our kwashiokor justice system.

We have heard various reason why the girl was raped, one says she insulted one of the boys and she was waylaid and raped. The other says she met one of the boys online, said dude has been paying for her bis and sending her money. She decided to visit him in school and bam, she was raped.

The first reason given is popular in our cultism filled campuses. We have all heard the gists, even though we never got to confirm them. Any girl who dares raise an eyebrow or talks back to the boys is punished with rape.

Some idiots are screaming all over the place asking why she would follow the boy to his hostel or where ever the incident occurred. In the second instance given is a betrayal of trust, I believe one of the basis of friendship is trust. For one who has more male than female friends, I believe the only reason I would follow a male friend to his house is because I trust he values our friendship. If this girl and one of the boys were friends, then her trust in him failed her.

AyoShonaiya Ayo Shonaiya

As Nigerians, our attitude 2 sex & women has jaundiced our view of rape as sometimes punishment but not a crime.

18 Sep Favorite Retweet Reply

I cannot help but agree with the above tweet, I read some tweets and comments which said some girls deserves to be raped and one which says the rape should be a lesson to us girls.

I still stick to my belief that we are a nation of pretentious people filled with much venom in our veins. It is so sad that we have become an insensitive nation, a nation of people whose soul have become empty to the plights of victims of such vice. We sit down and point accusing fingers, till it happens to someone we know. then it will not be the victim's fault, because she is our own, our blood, it is then we call for justice. But when the victim is someone's daughter, we castigate her, call her name, curse her and forget that whatever happened is never her fault.

Yesterday, I had a discussion on the issue with some members of the Nigerian community here in Hyderabad, they were able to download and watch 11minutes of the video and even have it stored on their systems. They were also of the opinion that the video did not tell rape and one question I put to them was can they as men sleep with a girl for over 1hour and not lose their energy. In this case we are not even talking of one man, we are talking of about 5men and you tell me the girl is not screaming, she did not put up enough fight.

In Nigeria, our men blame we ladies for wearing skimpy clothes. excuses such as the mode of dressing is what seduces them. At least in India, I know the ladies do not dress indecently, yet the number of rape here is alarming. I have read of more than 70years old women been raped in the nation's capital, abi is the old woman also provocatively dressed. In the so called Islamic Nations, women in hijabs are getting raped by so called rebels and then I ask again what entices a man to a woman is fully covered up. The worst of it all, men who rape children, what crime or what fantasy do this little beings evoke in a man.

Because some idiots will sit down to justify rape and blame the victim. People who justify rape are as wicked as the idiots who commits the act.

Our boys have become the evil we have to run from, they have taken over from the devil and are now the devil we are to pray against.

We need to start teaching our boys to be real men.
Someone needs to teach our boys not be weakling of their own emotions.
Present day young mothers and future mothers need to prepare themselves to teach their boys the right way.
The future does not need the weak, subservient idiots we have in our generation.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Workplace Bullying

2011-09-14T15:45:00.002+01:00

The news has been all over the web for a week now, Radio Personality, Olisa Adibua physically attacked a co-worker, albeit a junior staff of Beat FM. I read the young man's statement. I watched the so called reunion Video on Youtube and all I can see is the fear of a loss of livelihood in the voice and eyes of Dewunmi.

How much could Olisa be bringing in to the company that they cannot afford to sack him for this unruly and unethical behaviour of his. Celebrities in the US have committed lesser crimes and they have paid dearly for it. For crying out loud, the last time I checked he does not own the organization.

What is the Labour union doing about this and why is the Governor of Lagos not saying anything about this. He must have heard the news. Why is everyone accepting this mediocre apology from the Olisa and worse the Management of Beat FM should be ashamed of this charade.

The part that got me cracking is the part of we are best of friends like we were before, like seriously I hope the guy was not reading a script. I do not know the economic situation of the guy for him to have still continued to work in that organization without getting justice for what happened to him. As in there are plenty media organizations in the country. I hope Dewunmi knows he is entitled to compensation from the organization even though he has refused to press charges.

I have witnessed verbal attack in the workplace. I have been verbally bullied by a former boss before and I was so relieved when the project we were working on was over and I jejely left the organization. I have witnessed worse verbal attacks but never physical attack. I once asked a man who was verbally attacked by his boss why he could not quit and he told me I could only imagine quitting as an option because I was more or less still been fed by my parents. He had families to take care of, bills to pay, so quitting because his boss had verbally attacked him was no option. So I guess this is Dewunmi's situation, because I do not want to believe a gun was put to his head and he started yarning gibberish like he is doing in the video

I just hope Olisa does not remove someone else's eye or commit murder on the premises of Beat FM before they realise they should sack him.

They have said we should mind our own business, case has been settled internally. So I hereby 'me su onu' my mouth.

Incase you missed the statement and video, you can read and watch below.

Adewunmi Oyekanmi’s Official Statement

My name is Adewunmi Oyekanmi, news editor with the Beat 99.9 Fm.

An incident occurred at my work place within the early hours of the 8th of Sep 2011 between myself and another member of staff which has been blown out of proportion in the media.

I have been wrongfully quoted in various blogs and magazines, but this will be my first official statement and the last, so please disregard anything you might have seen, heard or read.

The incident in question has been dealt with to my satisfaction by the Management of Megalectrics, operators of The Beat 99.9 Fm, in a swift and conclusive manner.

The member of staff (Mr Olisa Adibua) with whom I had the altercation with, has duly apologized most sincerely and I have accepted, based on the fact that since I started working at the station, my relationship with the said party has always been cordial and friendly.

In reference to a purported conversation between myself and an undercover reporter, I’d like to state categorically that I have never had a phone conversation or granted any interview to any media or reporter.
What transpired was an internal matter which was leaked into the public domain to create division within our corporate entity. I refuse to be used as a pawn or be labelled ‘the voiceless or oppressed’.

Megalectrics, the operators of the beat 99.9fm employed me in the capacity of news editor in July 2010, and ever since I have had no cause to complain about the working environment, my colleagues or superiors.
We operate an open system where everyone is free to speak their minds, regardless of rank of hierarchy.
Once again, I’d like to reiterate that the matter has been resolved and the member of staff has apologized for the altercation we had.

In conclusion, I would like this issue to be extinguished so I can get back to my normal every day life, as the recent publications and rumors circulating have put a strain on my family and private life.
I would like to thank the management and staff of Megalectrics for the swift and decisive response to the matter. I would also like to thank everyone who showed concern. I’d like to reassure you that I am okay and in good health as is confirmed by my attached photo.

These are my final words on the subject.

Thank you very much and God bless.

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Travelogue-Indian Attraction: Araku Hillstation

2011-09-09T22:38:00.005+01:00

Day 2 of the trip: Araku valley.

The train trip to Araku valley is the best part of the trip. Araku is about 115kilometres from Vizag and a famous hill stations in the state. I fell in love with the rich and green landscape. The train ride from Vizag to Araku took 5hours and in all we passed a total of 57tunnels, several bridges, rice fields, coffee plantations, waterfalls and valleys and numerous hills.

5:20am at the Vizag train station, waiting for the train to Araku, train arrived at the station at 6am and left 6:40am

The Train interior

Borra Caves

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Travelogue-Indian Attraction: Visakhapatnam (The Jewel of the East Coast)

2011-09-06T19:49:00.001+01:00

Sometimes old things need to go away. That way, we have room for the new things that come into our lives. ~Randy K. Milholland

This is my guiding quote for the month, happily lifted from Blogoratti 's blog. Wishing everyone a wonderful month.

Biko T.Notes, why are you harassing me now. My post at the beginning of Ramadan says gone till September and I still succeeded in have 3 posts up. Oya, I have updated the blog oh.

At the rate at which I am going, this babe will be penniless by the time I go back to Nigeria. 3things take away my money nowadays, Travels, Books and Shoes (side-eye to any raised eyebrow).

The first time, I heard of Visakhapatnam (Vizag) was in March, when I had told a former colleague that I would like to explore the state of Andhra Pradesh asides Hyderabad where I live and he suggested Vizag. It was love at 1st view. I almost cancel the trip like I have done in the last 4months when I couldn't get train tickets. Thank God for foreigner's quota, I was able to get train tickets out of Hyderabad, getting tickets back to Hyderabad was another wahala, waiting list for train was up to 50, there was no available bus ticket for 4th of September back to Hyderabad. We had to cut the trip short by a day and leave Vizag on the 3rd.

off to Vizag

Secunderabad Train station

off to Vizag: In the train.

Welcome to Visakhapatnam

Vizag Train station

Simhachalam Temple

Indian women

In the cable car

Rishikonda Beach

The SubMarine Museum

The Fishing Harbor

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Repost: Iye mi-Ode to my Mother...

2011-08-20T09:36:00.003+01:00

I love my mother as the trees love water and sunshine - she helps me grow, prosper, and reach great heights.

It's my mum's birthday today, the above statement best describes my woman who i owe my life to asides God.

Iye mi-Ode to my Mother...:

Yeye mi
Iyaniwura
Iya rere ni iyami
Orisa bi iya osi
Orisa mi
Ayo mi
Idunu re, idunu mi

Mama mi
Modupe ojo ti obi mi
Mo dupe, itoju to fun mi
Mo dupe. eko ti o ko mi

Ayo re o ni di ibanuje
Wahala re lori omo ko ni jasi asan
Eni ele ni o ni gba ise re se
Oni subu da a nu
Wa jeun omo tidi ojo ale
Wa jere omo
Oni fi oju sunkun omo
-----
Translation

My mother
Precious mother
My mother is a good mother
There is no deity like a mother
My deity
My joy
Your happiness is my happiness

My Mother
I thank you for the day you gave birth to me
I thank you for the care you gave to me
I thank you for all you taught me

Your joy shall not turn to sadness
Your trouble on the child shall not be in vain
No one else will take your place
You shall reap the fruit of your labour

♥ Lara from Incredible India

Mad for Mumbai by Catherine Taylor

2011-08-15T16:21:00.002+01:00

Unlike the writer, I am mad for Hyderabad. I have not experienced it all but, I must say my experience has been pretty much saner than this but I can totally relate to this story. India does a lot to you and you truly can experience India when you live it in and not through a tourist lens. This article is like 10months old, but it is so relevant to the life of every foreigner living in this specially made Nation.

Happy Independence day to the Nation, I have come to respect for its beauty, culture, beliefs, traditions and Prides of its People.The unusual and truly Incredible India.

Living in India is like having an intense but insane affair, writes expat Catherine Taylor

TONIGHT, as I waved my high heel in the face of a bewildered taxi driver, I thought suddenly: I am absolutely nuts in India. It's a thought I have often. Someone or something is always going nuts, andquite often it's me.

I was trying to get a taxi driver to take me home, a mere 500 metres away, but it was pouring with rain and my shoes were oh-so-high, and it was late. He, of course, was having none of it; no amount of shoe-waving and sad-facing from a wild-haired firangi was changing his mind, when suddenly I remembered the magic trick - pay more than you should. "Arre, bhai sahab, 50 rupees to Altamount Road? Please?" And off we went.

I have lived in Mumbai for almost three years. It was my choice to come - I wanted offshore experience in my media career and India was the only country looking to hire - and I wanted a change. I needed something new, exciting, thrilling, terrifying. And India gave that to me in spades. In fact, she turned it all the way up to 11. And then she turned it up a little more.

To outsiders, living in India has a particular kind of glamour attached to it, a special sparkle that sees people crowding around me at parties. "You live in India? My God, really? I could never do that. What's it like?" The closest I have come to answering that question is that it's like being in a very intense, extremely dysfunctional relationship. India and I fight, we scream, we argue, we don't speak for days on end, but really, deep down, we love each other. She's a strange beast, this India. She hugs me, so tightly sometimes that I can't breathe, then she turns and punches me hard in the face, leaving me stunned. Then she hugs me again, and suddenly I know everything will be all right.

She wonders why I don't just "know" how things are done, why I argue with her about everything, why I judge, why I rail at injustice and then do nothing about it. She wonders how old I am, how much I earn, why I'm not married. (The poor census man looked at me, stunned, then asked in a faltering voice, "But madam, if you're not married then… who is the head of your household?") I wonder how she can stand by when small children are begging on corners, how she can let people foul up the streets so much that they are impossible to walk along, how she can allow such corruption, such injustice, such A LOT OF HONKING.

But she has taught me things. She has taught me to be brave, bold, independent, sometimes even fierce and terrifying. She has taught me to walk in another man's chappals, and ask questions a different way when at first the answer is no. She has taught me to accept the things I cannot change. She has taught me that there are always, always, two sides to every argument. And she was kind enough to let me come and stay.

She didn't make it easy though (but then, why should she?). The Foreigner Regional Registration Office, banks, mobile phone companies and rental agencies are drowning under piles of carbon paper, photocopies of passports (I always carry a minimum of three) and the soggy tissues of foreigners who fall to pieces in the face of maddening bureaucracy. What costs you 50 rupees one day might be 500 rupees the next, and nobody will tell you why. What you didn't need to bring yesterday, you suddenly need to bring today. Your signature doesn't look like your signature. And no, we can't help you. Come back tomorrow and see.

It's not easy being here, although I am spoiled by a maid who cooks for me, and a delivery service from everywhere that ensures I rarely have to wave my shoes at taxi drivers. I buy cheap flowers, trawl for gorgeous antiques, buy incredibly cheap books; I have long, boozy brunches in five-star hotels for the price of a nice bottle of wine at home, I have a very nice roof over my head … on the face of it, it would seem I have little to complain about. But then, I am stared at constantly, I have been spat on, sexually harassed, had my (covered) breasts videotaped as I walked through a market, had my drink spiked, been followed countless times. I have wept more here than I have ever in my life, out of frustration, anger, loneliness, the sheer hugeness of being here. But the longer I stay, the more I seem to relax, let go, let it be.

But I do often wonder why I'm here, especially when I'm tired, teary and homesick, my phone has been disconnected for the 19th time despite promises it would never happen again, when it's raining and no taxis will take me home. But then a willing ride always comes along, and we'll turn a corner and be suddenly in the midst of some banging, crashing mad festival full of colour, where everyone is dancing behind a slow-moving truck, and I won't have a clue what's going on but a mum holding a child will dance up to my window and point and smile and laugh, and I breathe out and think, really, my God, this is fantastic. This is India! I live in India! She hugs me, she punches me, and she hugs me again.

Yet I know won't ever belong here, not properly. I know this when I listen to girls discussing what colour blouses they should wear to their weddings - she's Gujarati, he's from the south, she's wearing a Keralan sari. I know when my friends give me house-hunting advice: "Look at the names of the people who already live there, then you'll know what kind of building it is." (Trouble is, I don't know my Kapoors from my Kapurs, my Sippys from my Sindhis, my Khans from my Jains). I know this when my lovely fruit man (who also delivers) begs me to taste a strawberry he is holding in his grubby hands and I have to say no, I can't eat it, I'll die… I know I will never belong because, as stupid as it sounds, being truly, properly Indian is in your DNA. I marvel at how incredibly well educated so many of them are, how they can all speak at least three languages and think it's no big deal, how they fit 1000 people into a train carriage meant for 300 and all stand together quite peacefully, how they know the songs from every Hindi film ever made, how they welcome anyone and everyone (even wild-haired, complaining firangis) into their homes for food, and chai, and more food.

I've seen terrible things - someone fall under a train, children with sliced-off ears, old, old men sitting in the rain nursing half-limbs while they beg, children covered in flies sleeping on the pavement, beggars with no legs weaving themselves through traffic on trolleys, men in lunghis working with their hands in tiny corridors with no fans in sky-high temperatures. I've read heartbreaking things, of gang rapes, corruption, environmental abuse. I've smelled smells that have stripped the inside of my nostrils, stepped over open sewers in markets, watched a goat being bled to death.

I've done things of which I am ashamed, things I never thought I would do. I have slapped a starving child away, I have turned my head in annoyance when beggars have tapped repeatedly on my taxi window, I have yelled at grown men in the face. I have been pinched and pinched back, with force. I have slapped, I have hit, I have pushed. I have screamed in anger. I have, at times, not recognised myself.

I've yelled at a man for kicking a dog, and yelled at a woman who pushed into a line ahead of me when I wasn't at all in a hurry. When a teenage beggar stood at the window of my taxi, saying "F… you madam" over and over, I told him to go f… himself and gave him the finger; once on the train I let a kid keep 100 rupees as change. I am kind and I am cold-hearted, I am fair and I am mean, I am delightful and I am downright rude. I am all of these at once and I distress myself wildly over it, but somehow, India accepts me. She has no time for navel-gazing foreigners; she just shoved everyone along a bit and made room for me. She has no time to dwell on my shortcomings, she just keeps moving along.

And then, and then. I've been to temples where I've sung along with old women who had no teeth,I've held countless smiling ink-marked babies for photos, I've had unknown aunties in saris smile and cup my face with their soft, wrinkled hands, I've made street vendors laugh when I've choked on their spicy food, I've danced through the streets at Ganpati, fervently sung the national anthem (phonetically) in cinemas, had designers make me dresses, I've met with CEOs and heads of companies just because I asked if I could. She hugs, she punches, she hugs again.

In short, I have been among the luckiest of the lucky. She keeps me on my toes, Ms India, andI have been blessed that she let me stay for a while. She wanted me to succeed here and she gave me grand opportunities and endless second chances. She willed me forward like a stern parent. She welcomed me. And when I leave, because I know I will one day, I will weep, because I will miss her terribly. And because I know she won't even notice that I am gone.

Source

The Australian

♥ Lara from Incredible India