LA*SURFPUNK HOLLYWOOD

BARF

2017-07-22T13:05:00.001-07:00

In movie or stage contracts, this hag has stipulations that no one (the crew or anyone deemed insufficient or beneath said hag) can directly address (talk to) or look into its eyes. And who would want to? Are you that full of yourself that you think that you are that important?? It's not like you found a cure for AIDS or made a heart valve replacement or kissing diseased children in the rainforest. CUNT.

And don't use the name: Babs.

With that said....

We look into the eyes of Babs and let U know that this bitch has some crappo book on design or something perpetrating as such. Look at that cheesy color AND dressing to match the couch. Really? That would be a cover on what NOT to do. We're sure the booklet goes downhill from just this observation. ICK.

If we had our man, Luke Guldan, over for some night action-- we would be embarrassed if the place looked like anything you're trying to pass off. It's so old yenta, chintz and velvet. pleaz!!

Like we would want our abode to look like anything this megalomaniac monstrosity suggests.

The only thing we want from you is your husband's hot son's (Josh Brolin, hello) digits!!

We realize this thing is many a gay icon, a deity to some of you, but that is your problem, not ours.

Judy, Liza and Babs-- please.... let it go already. It's so swishy queen with feather boa and leather mustache daddy with biker hat.... leftover from Studio 54 and the 70s.

Get a new icon.... may we suggest Cher or Tina or even Belinda-- you can look in their eyes AND they aren't trying to shake you down for more money by offering classless decorating tips.

SUMMER SUN SOMETHING'S BEGUN.....

2017-02-28T18:06:00.001-08:00

SUMMER 2017:

SO EXCITED!!!!

#AlienCovenant

FRENCH TOAST

2016-06-06T13:24:00.001-07:00

FRENCH ROAST:

In the late 1970s and early 1980s, we were huge Borg and McEnroe fans. LOVED their rivalry!!!

Through the 1990s and early 2000s, we just didn't like any of the players. ICK! BARF!

THE SEAS PART:

THEN!!!!!!!! It was 2004 when we first saw Novak.

WHAT CAUGHT OUR ATTENTION: Novak and Rafa were the only ones with these wicked cross-court backhands that would barely kiss the insides of the service lines; they were fast and hard. These two could hit them all day long and not be called out---which was just AMAZING!!! And, these two played so fast; they would take their opponents by surprise on how fast they played their games--- before the opponent knew it, the score was 1-5 in Novak and Rafa's favor. They still do it and they are even faster today!!!

It was that year (2004) when we hitched our ardent fan trailer to Nole Cakes and have NEVER looked back!!!!

In 2004, everyone was all gaga over Andy Roddick ( ICK!! and so smug; so condescending! So smug for what---- he only won ONE--that is 1-- major title: The US Open. And where is he today? Oh that's right: retired!!! And, where is Novak today??!!!!

We remember in 2007, Djokovic was in the finals against Federer at the US Open. He lost but we just knew he would keep getting better and better then he would win majors.

In 2011, Novak's major turning point came when he OVERCAME two match points in the semi-finals against Federer at the US Open. He won that semi then he won the final to take his first US Open in 2011. Anybody remember how PISSED Federer was (and the fans and media always report how humble and gracious Roger is/was---NOT!!!!).

Yesterday's 2016 Roland Garros win for Novak made us so proud, We cried some happy tears for our guy. We know how hard and elusive this French Open title has been to him. He has made us proud!!!

NOLE4EVER!!!!!

LOVE IS ALL AROUND ......

2015-06-26T14:26:00.001-07:00

......YOU'RE GONNA MAKE IT AFTER ALL!

CELEBRATE! CELEBRATE! CELEBRATE!

PROPOSE! PROPOSE! PROPOSE!

CONSUMMATE! CONSUMMATE! CONSUMMATE!

And!!!! ON the Friday kick-off of NYC Pride weekend!!!!!!!

These later dates of June are the anniversary of THE STONEWALL RIOTS!!!

THE BIG APPLE will be OFF! THE! CHAIN!!!!

STONEWALL WILL BE ROCKIN', DON'T BOTHER KNOCKIN'!!!!

STAY INSIDE THE LINES(MAN)!!!

2015-06-07T14:58:00.001-07:00

LINE DRIVES:

Stay inside the linesman!!!

We'd LOVE to!!

As much as we love watching the MALE players, we also love what's going on in the peripherals.

All the HOT!!!! guys ON the court and OFF the court (i.e. the audience).

This year was NO different at the French Open 2015!!!

These TWO linesman really had our jaws adroppin'.

TV LAND

2015-04-26T15:08:00.000-07:00

The amount of excellent shows (some airing in the same time slot) on TV these past few Sunday nights puts us in sensory OVERLOAD!!!

Game of Thrones (HBO)

Silicon Valley (HBO)

Veep (HBO)

Nurse Jackie (Showtime)

Mad Men (AMC)

Mr. Selfridge (PBS)

Wolf Hall (PBS)

NEWS FROM THE WES SIDE

2015-03-18T13:06:00.004-07:00

Fucking A!!!

Wes Bentley is joining American Horror Story: Hotel!!! He will be a cast REGULAR on the popular Ryan Murphy series for FX.

Hellz yeah!!!

He gets us all frisky and amorous.....which will now be every Wednesday nights in the fall.....

YOU'VE GOT MALE

2015-02-22T12:13:00.000-08:00

A WORD FROM THE WISE:

To all the men attending The Academy Awards as nominees and guests and for those walking the red carpet: WEAR A TRADITIONAL TUXEDO.

End of story.

No discussion.

No arguments and other considerations.

THAT. IS. IT!

DO IT!!!

LOOKING HOT!

2015-01-28T15:28:00.001-08:00

OBSESSION:

We can't get enough of Sunday's LOOKING episode (S2/E3) Looking Top to Bottom.

Russell has us all tongue-tied and amorous--just by his mere presence!!!

Remember: We SnapChat while watching LOOKING every Sunday until the season is over. Join the fun and friend us!!

Snapchat user name: lasurfpunk

OH SNAP

2015-01-27T19:22:00.001-08:00

via SnapChat: lasurfpunk

Rafa Cakes is out!!!!

LETTING THE CHAT OUT OF THE BAG

2015-01-19T20:25:00.001-08:00

OH SNAP:

We've been SnapChatting the first round matches of all the HOT guys at the Australian Open 2015!!

.......not to mention yesterday's LOOKING episode.

Add us: lasurfpunk

#TEAMKEVIN

2015-01-05T15:46:00.002-08:00

LOOKING AT MY BOOKMARKS

2015-01-04T15:45:00.001-08:00

Season 2 of LOOKING is one week away!! YAY!!!!!

We have been watching episodes of Season 1 since it ended early last year. (Okay, not every day but almost!!! Obsessed much?)

We felt it only fitting to make a post of our observations.

In the episode Looking at Your Browser History, we made notes of Patrick's top websites.

How? Remember, he makes a deal to himself: to hunker down and focus on his career instead of wasting time on his internet nonsense, like his OKCupid and Manhunt accounts. He gives the accounts one last look then depresses the "delete" button on all of them. He storms Kevin's office the next day to profess his new commitment to his job and discloses that he built a new female character for the gaming account.

Well, while Paddy was deleting, we were writing it all down.

Patrick Murray's top 10 websites:

1. Boing Boing

2. Gizmodo

3. Tumblr

4. OKCupid (deleted)

5. Gawker

6. Buzzfeed

7. SFist

8. Gmail

9. Google Maps

10. News (folder)

NOW!!!!------ go be like Paddy Melt and bookmark these as your top 10 too!!

BRONZED BULGE

2014-12-22T19:29:00.000-08:00

Just file this under: "THINGS WE LOVE TO WORSHIP"

We have no problem getting on our KNEES and partaking in some worship, especially if it's Crissy Cakes.

You want us to start at the HEAD?

LOOKING COMICAL

2014-12-19T10:54:00.001-08:00

How great is this!

One of the Archie comic book cartoonist, Dan Parent, reimagined the LOOKING characters with an Archie-esque spin.

It certainly DRAWS us into staring dreamily at Paddy and Kevin......

IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE

2014-12-15T13:45:00.001-08:00

Are WE the only ones that consider Ordinary People a tingly, touchy-feely, warm-my-heart holiday movie?

We LOVE!!!! the 1980-designed Neiman Marcus shopping bags. We still have ours too!! Time capsule souvenirs.

Pour a mug of hot chocolate and curl up with some peppermint bark and recite the lines with MTM.

*****************

After the birthday party:

         BETH
                            You drink too much at parties,
                            Calvin.
          
                                      CALVIN
                            I'm not drunk.
          
                                      BETH
                            Why did you tell Annie Marshall
                            that Conrad is seeing a
                            psychiatrist?
          
                                      CALVIN
                            I dunno. Why not?
          
                                      BETH
                            Well for one thing, I don't think
                            people hear that kind of thing very
                            easily.
          
                                      CALVIN
                            Come on, for most people, it's a
                            status symbol, right up there with
                            going to Europe.
          
                                      BETH
                            Well, I thought your blurting it
                            out like that was in very bad
                            taste...
          
                                      CALVIN
                            I did not think it was that...
          
                                      BETH
                            Not to mention a violation of
                            privacy!
          
                                      CALVIN
                            Whose privacy?
          
               Beth is strangely vehement.
          
                                      BETH
                            Our privacy! The family's privacy!
                            I think it is a very private
                            matter.

*******************

At the golf course in Houston, TX:

                                       BETH
                                 (she shouts)
                             I don't know what everyone wants
                             from me anymore!
          
                                       AUDREY
                             Beth, nobody wants anything from
                             you.
          
                                       WARD
                             Beth, listen. We all just want...
                             Cal, Con, everybody, we just want
                             you to be happy.
          
                                       BETH
                             Happy?
          
                                       WARD
                             Yes.
          
                                       BETH
                             Ward, you tell me the definition of
                             happy, uh? But first, you better
                             make sure that your kids are good
                             and safe, that no one's fallen off
                             a horse, or been hit by a car, or
                             drowned in that swimming pool
                             you're so proud of! And then you
                             come to me and tell me how to be
                             happy!





WORK, BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!

WES COAST LIFESTYLE

2014-11-11T12:13:00.002-08:00

RIDE A BENTLEY:

Wes Bentley is so fucking HOT!!! as Edward Mordrake on AHS: Freak Show. That dark long hair, the blue eyes, those chops---- we'd fall under the spell of his moon!!! Ahhhh la luna... la luna

HOT FLASHES

2014-10-16T13:44:00.003-07:00

It has been confirmed that Games of Thrones, Season 5 will get flashback scenes!! May we suggest a SEX scene of Lord Renly with a SMOKIN' HOT GUY!!!

WHEN YOU THINK....EVERYONE IS A DUMB ASS---BECAUSE THEY ARE!!!!!!!!

2014-10-15T14:27:00.004-07:00

-

This dumb-ass CDC is ALWAYS saying how "we're ready, we're ready" if there is ever an outbreak. These stupid bitches ain't ready.

And, this dumb cunt nurse traveling--- knowing and feeling symptomatic.....selfish bitch. I thought an unspoken oath was to help mankind and this bitch decides to travel. Where is the most BASIC common sense at?: Okay, I just treated somebody with a lethal virus. Let me take a time out, wait a month before any type of traveling or doing anything drastic that could impact others.....WHERE IS THAT MORAL COMPASS AT these days?

With the stupidity and careless actions of everybody involved, this is why it could tun into a deadly pandemic.

OUR LATEST OBSESSION

2014-09-30T12:18:00.002-07:00

MARRY ME!!!:

We can't get enough of Will Grant!!!

THANK YOU

2014-09-30T11:27:00.003-07:00

DID YOU KNOW?:

Just under 20% of our readership uses an Apple peripheral device to access our blog!!

This blog has amassed millionS--yes, with a "S"-- of page views since its inception!! Who would have thunk??

That means, you're pulling out your phone or tablet on the bus, during your break, at lunch, and to/fro the gym to read LA*SURFPUNK HOLLYWOOD!! We had NO IDEA that there was an audience so hungry for an Olympic swimmer in his Speedo (one of our TOP 5 posts of all time!!!).

We just want to say, Thank you! Thank you for making us a part of your day, every day!!

LOOKING FOR FOLSOM STREET

2014-09-25T15:35:00.004-07:00

HOMO BOX OFFICE:

Raul Castillo and Jonathan Groff

Snapped at 2014's Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco, it is Jonny and Raul!!

We miss you guys!! January 2015 is a loooooooooong time to wait for Season 2 of Looking.

Is it too early to state that Looking may have an ANNUAL Folsom Street Fair episode each season?? WE CAN ONLY HOPE!!

via instagram account of Andrew Haigh

A LOVE MATCH

2014-08-21T13:04:00.001-07:00

HELL TO THE OHHHHHH: HELLO!!!!:

MOVE OVER Nole Cakes, there is a new guy in town!!! We kid. We kid!!!! Nole ain't going any where as far as we are concerned. He's still our #1!!! 4ever!!!

BUT...L@@K who we found tucked in the pages of our VOGUE---THE SEPTEMBER ISSUE (THE one and only September issue as far as we're concerned!!!).

It's tennis ace/stud, Grigor Dimitrov.

He's lookin' hella finz too!!! Yummmm. Yummmm.

It will be interesting to see what he brings to the US Open. He caused quite a buzz at Wimbledon, especially for his performance against Novak in a match leading to the finals.

For those looking for a tennis idol to get their claws in...NOW would be a good time to hitch your wagon to Grigor before the train pulls out of the station. We see good things ahead in his career. Jump on board before it is too late. You don't want to be a Johnny-come-lately.

We've already hitched our trailer to Nole (since 2004!!! We fell in LOVE with the lad when we FIRST saw his face AND his wicked cross-court backhand (that evasively kisses the line). A signature move in which Nole has since perfected for over a decade and can give a clinic on!!!)

NUCLEAR NOLE

2014-07-06T15:38:00.003-07:00

WIMBLEDON SAGA: PART DEUX:

R-E-S-I-L-I-E-N-T

The key word to sum up Nole today.

His energy scorched everything hurled in his direction like an atom bomb at The All England Lawn Tennis and Croquet Club.

Our Serbian stud beat smug face: 6-7, 6-4, 7-6, 5-7, 6-4.

Our readers know: NEVER count Nole out of the game! NEVER!!!!

Congrats to our Nole Cakes on his second (part deux) Wimbledon win!!!

LOOKING FOR TAKEOUT

2014-03-15T12:22:00.001-07:00

LOVE!!!

HOT!!!

Jonathan Groff and Russell Tovey