Latte Mommy

On This Historic Day

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 03:55:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat Latte, Extra-Hot (my first foray into the land of coffee in a while - the morning sickness must be wearing off - yay!)

On this historic day.... a little known fact about Barack Obama:

It's That Time Already?

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 17:56:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat Tazo Chai Latte

I can hardly believe it.

I just got home from registering the Princess for kindergarten. Kindergarten! My little girl is going to be starting school in the Fall! It can't be that time already, can it?

Admittedly, I'm going through this a little earlier than most parents - the Princess is a December baby, so she just makes the cut-off to apply to school for this Fall. If she were born just a few weeks later, I would have another whole year to get used to this idea. However, that's not the case. She'll just be a wee little 4-year-old when she starts school in September!

Don't get me wrong, though - she's totally ready to go. She's been in preschool for 2 years now, and she absolutely loves school. She's very social, and she loves the opportunity to be among other children. She also loves, loves, loves to learn new things. She has discovered those workbooks that you can buy at the bookstore that have activities geared at different age levels - you know, the ones designed to teach your child reading, math, etc. Well, she can't get enough of those things. She will sit at the kitchen counter for long stretches of time doing those workbooks, totally of her own volition. We have never asked her to do them, in fact sometimes we have to take them away because she's been at it for more than an hour at a time! She reminds me so much of myself at that age - I loved anything to do with school as well. It's so delightful to see a child with such an innate love of learning.

But it's hard for Mommy to let go. I am so happy for her that she's going to be starting school because I know she's going to really enjoy it. And, it will be good to have her off at school for part of the day when there's a new baby in the house - one less thing I have to worry about, right? But at the same time I want to hang on to her a little longer, have a little more of that "little kid" time before letting her cross over into "big kid" land. I'm selfish, I know, but I want my first "baby" to stay a "baby" a little longer. Where does the time go?

Like Curling Up in Front of the Fire with a Blanket and a Good Book

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 23:43:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat Tazo Chai Latte, Extra-Hot

After weeks on end of snow, now what do we have? Rain. Lots of it. Meaning lots of slush and lots of flooding of streets (but hopefully not my basement). Eww.

What does all this nasty winter weather call for? You guessed it: comfort food.

Tonight comfort food is coming in the way of old-fashioned beef stew and homemade butter biscuits. Mmmmm. In fact, the stew is simmering on the stove right now, filling my kitchen with its amazing scent. If I hadn't had a crazy, running around like a chicken with its head cut off, out in the rain getting my hair all frizzy kind of day, this comforting supper would be accompanied by an equally comforting dessert. Oh well, you can't have everything, I guess.

(But if I could choose, it would probably be lemon meringue pie. Just for the record.)

What do you turn to when the weather gets you down?

Winter Wonderhell

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 04:23:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat Tazo Chai Latte (it's all I can stomach these days)

I am done with the snow. D-O-N-E. Done.

I live in the suburbs of Vancouver. We don't get snow here. Ok, ok, maybe a few flakes here and there, nothing to get excited about, generally gone by the next day. Certainly not "30+ centimeters at a time, for days on end, for nearly 3 weeks now" kind of snow. That's why I moved here. I like not getting snow in the winter time - it's very civilized.

Now, the problem isn't that I'm not used to snow. I come from the far reaches of Eastern Canada originally - trust me, I've seen my fair share of snow. I've shovelled it, I've gone sledding in it, I've thrown snowballs. I've had endless winters of it that started in October and didn't go away until late April or early May. I've walked to school, 20 miles, uphill both ways in blinding snowstorms... you know the drill...

My problem with long stretches of snow in greater Vancouver is that THIS CITY DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH SNOW! Sorry, I'm yelling. I can't help it. I'm just so frustrated!!!!!

I come from a place that knows about snow. They know winter comes every year, they budget for it, they buy snowplows, employ endless numbers of city workers, and stockpile mountains of salt. When it starts to snow, they start plowing. And they plow 24 HOURS A DAY until the snow is cleared and the city can go about its' business in a normal fashion.

Greater Vancouver apparently knows nothing about these practices. My city, which has a population of more than 400,000 people, only seems to have 3 or 4 plows on the go. And the people who operate them GO HOME AT 4 PM. No, really. I'm serious. My husband snarled at people from City Hall for nearly an hour on the phone one day, slowly working his way up the management chain, until he learned that little tidbit from one of the higher-ups at City Works. We almost fell on the floor laughing at him when he told us that. Where do these people come from?????

Over the last 2+ weeks more than 100 centimeters of snow has fallen on my yard, my driveway, and my street. And, believe this one or not, the city has never plowed my street. I don't live on a major through-road, so we apparently don't get plowed. Ever. Even if it means I can't get out of my house for days on end. Glad to see my tax dollars working so hard.

AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!

I'm so bloody frustrated, I'm ready to lose my mind.

Thankfully, the weather chick on CBC tells me this may be coming to an end in the next couple of days. The temperature is supposed to rise, and they're calling for large amounts of rain to wash all this bloody snow away. However, she refuses to say that there won't be any snow included in this system. She's covering her ass. Wiley bitch, that one. She knows that one of these days I'm going to come right through the television and whip her bony white ass.

I'm seriously hoping that the rain washes away some of the crazy I'm feeling.

End of rant. Thanks for listening. (if you still are) :)

Here We Go, Again

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 17:00:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat Tazo Chai Latte

So, the more observant among you (those who aren't hung over today, I'm betting) have already figured out my little New Year's secret. Yep, it's true. I'm pregnant. Again.

But this time I showed a little restraint and kept this one under wraps until a little later in the game. Still not completely out of the 1st trimester woods, but I'm cautiously optimistic that things are ok this time around. Optimistic enough to have started a little side blog, in fact. Come join me over at Lattes For Two for the whole story. And then keep coming back to follow along until the big day arrives sometime in July. That's the day that my carefully organized (ha!), precariously balanced little parenting act erupts into full-blown "I have 3 kids now, watch how my head spins" chaos. Should be fun, in that unable to avert your eyes, gawking at the accident on the highway kind of way.

Doesn't that make you want to click over?

Anyway... on to other matters. So, it's the first day of 2009. How's it treating you so far? Personally, I'm in pretty good shape. Last night was very tame, even by my standards. In fact, I confess to having rung in the actual New Year from my bed, reading a really good book that you all should go out and get, if you haven't read it already, called The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger. I'm only a third of the way through, but it's a book I have a hard time putting down. Amazing.

Ok, I'm getting sidetracked. So, my New Year's was pretty tame. We ordered pizza, rented a movie, then retired to our respective computers, and then I went to bed. Hot couple, aren't we? Makes you wonder how I ever got pregnant, really. *sigh* But, truthfully, it's precisely what we both wanted to do this New Year. I'm pregnant, sick as a dog, and more tired than I've been at any time in my life outside of the immediate newborn phase of my two children. My husband has been working like a dog all over the holidays, and when he's not working he's been shovelling snow. Don't even get me started about the snow. Let's just say, I'm not a fan. Neither of us wanted to get dressed up and go to some ridiculous shin-dig at which we were both going to be sober (he's on call again tomorrow) and have to wait it out until midnight with the intoxicated masses before it was polite to leave. Thanks, but no thanks.

So, New Year 2009 came in quietly, just as we hoped.

Now, of course, it's time to make those pesky resolutions that never seem to be kept. I'm keeping it brief this year. My first resolution is to work on getting my home more organized. We're drowning in a sea of paper, and nothing in my house seems to have a home. That needs to change, or 2009 just might be the year I lose my mind. It's a big project, though, so I'm going to try to start small, working on one area of the house at a time. Hopefully by Spring I'll have things sorted out enough to go on a big Spring Cleaning binge and get things into shape before summer and the new baby come.

My second resolution is to try to keep up with my blog. I really lost my blogging mojo in the last quarter of 2008, and I kind of missed this as an outlet. And I missed all of you, of course! But I'm not doing anything crazy like joining Blog365 again this year. I know better. If I can plant my ass in front of the computer and pull off 3 or 4 reasonable posts a week, I'll be happy.

And that's it for this year. I'm capping it at 2 resolutions. No crazy plans to eat better, get into shape (the only shape I'll be working on this year is round, I'm thinkin'), or completely overhaul my life. Sorry, Oprah! Maybe this year I'll actually keep my resolutions. Feel free to kick me in the ass when necessary to get me to keep up on #2. Hopefully as #1 takes shape I'll have some before and after shots to show off. If nothing else, it will help keep #2 going, right?

So, my fellow bloggers (you few precious readers I have left!), what have you resolved for 2009?

Closing Out the Year

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 23:00:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat Tazo Chai Latte

*tap tap tap tap* Is this thing still on???

Well, folks, here we are. The last day of 2008. Is it just me, or was this a very long year? Phew. To tell the truth, I'm glad to be ringing it out.

I enjoy starting a New Year. I like the feeling of freshness to it - much the same as I still love September, even though I've been out of school for many years. It's like turning to a fresh, clean page full of possiblities.

I hope everyone reading this had a wonderful holiday season, full of family, friends, joy and laughter, and way too much good food. My holidays were very quiet, but they were happy and warm and filled with love, so I count this as a good year. Oh, and I puked every single morning, so that makes it a good one too. ;)

Happy New Year!

Is Saving Money Worth a Life? I Think Not

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 19:30:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat Tazo Chai Latte

At some point in time or another, I think everyone has fallen victim to the rampant consumerism that plagues our society. But today, Black Friday in the United States, the biggest shopping day that country sees, one person became a real victim. The greed of ridiculous mob of consumers whipped into a frenzy by the corporate machines that promote such ludicrous behaviour by opening up earlier and earlier on the day after Thanksgiving and creating an air of last-minute desperation among their customers, led to the death of a Wal-Mart employee in suburban New York.

A 34-year-old man was trampled to death when the customers outside lost their minds and ripped the door from the hinges and forced their way inside.

At a Wal-Mart.

People, really. What did you need that badly at Wal-Mart?

I'm so ashamed to be a member of the human race right now.

Happy Thanksgiving. Yeah, right.

Oprah's Got Billions, She Can Afford It

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 21:57:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip, Extra-Hot Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha

Well, folks, whether we like it or not the holiday season is upon us.

I, personally, like Christmas. I like the lights, I like the tree, I like the gathering around of family and friends, I like the food (maybe a little too much). But probably most of all, I like the music. I love Christmas tunes. Modern, traditional, whatever - I like it all. In fact, I'll confess to occasionally listening to Christmas music in the dead of summer. Call me crazy, that's ok, you won't be the first to do so.

So, I was delighted to catch a bit of Oprah today and discover that she's giving away Christmas music on her website for the next 48 hrs!!! Oprah's celebrating a thrifty Christmas this year (much, I'm sure, to the chagrin of those who managed to get tickets to her "Favourite Things" show this year - that's major disappointment). In honour of her new thrifty ways (yeah, right), Oprah has compiled a selection of Christmas songs that you can download for free on her website, but only for the next 48 hrs.

So what are you doing still here? Scurry on over there and download yourself some music to get you into the Christmas mood. Consider it my gift from Oprah to you. ;)

The Griswold Effect

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Sat, 22 Nov 2008 04:57:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip, Extra-Hot Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha

Has Christmas come to your neighbourhood yet? It's not out in full force in mine, but it's certainly trickling out at a steady pace. Every day more people have their lights up, and there are lots of trees peeking out of living room windows. It started nearly two weeks ago, believe it or not. I saw the first decorated house in my neighbourhood on November 11th.

Is it just me, or does that seem early to you?

When I was a kid, there was no such thing as decorating for Christmas before at least mid-December. And the tree didn't go up until the 23rd, no matter how much we begged. Now, keep in mind that my family always had a real tree. Artificial trees were considered tacky. And they looked it, too, back in the 70's and 80's. Eeek! And, given that the life span of a real tree is fairly limited, it makes sense to hold off on putting up a real tree until very close to Christmas Day. That way your tree is still fresh, still smells beautiful, and your presents aren't showered in needles when you go to open them.

I suspect that my parents also might not have wanted to put up decorations (and especially the tree) too early with kids in the house. I'm sure that we would have been bouncing off the walls once the decorating was done, asking every 3 seconds when Santa was coming. It would be enough to make your head explode, I'm certain.

To the best of my recollection, we were not the odd ones out in our neighbourhood by not decorating for Christmas until quite late in the game. I think the philosophy was different 30 (OMG, am I that old???) years ago. Christmas happened in December, not immediately after Hallowe'en.

It's obvious that part of the influence now is commercialism. The stores start putting out their Christmas wares at least around Hallowe'en, and often even earlier that that. People are susceptible to that influence, and it makes them want to decorate their homes. I totally get it. I found myself humming Christmas tunes and thinking about decorating my tree in October this year!! If you're like me and you like Christmas, it's hard not to want to get into the spirit as soon as the first signs of Christmas pop up in the neighbourhood stores.

But when is the right time to do it? Is there such a thing as too early? Is there an acceptable date for pulling all those red- and green-topped Rubbermaid bins out of storage and dusting off your Christmas CDs? My sister theorizes that Rememberance Day (November 11th) is a mental check-point for a lot of people. That it's considered socially acceptable to begin celebrating the holiday season after you've acknowledged the sacrifice of veterans. Fair enough. That makes sense, I guess.

For me, it's always been December 1st. I think of Christmas as a December holiday, and therefore I have trouble getting my head around decorating any earlier than that. A full month of Christmas decorations, Christmas music, food, etc. seems like it should be enough. But here I am, still in November, feeling like I'm the neighbourhood slacker because I don't have my Christmas decorations up yet. One woman from preschool (who has entirely too much time on her hands, I'm beginning to think) has her entire house decorated and not one, not two, but 3 (!) trees up and decorated since last week!!! It's no wonder I'm feeling behind on my game!

Is this problem strictly Canadian? I'm thinking that maybe the hub-bub around Thanksgiving in the States keeps the elves at bay... is that true? Do Americans wait until after Thanksgiving to decorate for Christmas?

Regardless, I think I now have the itch. No, not that kind. Minds out of the gutter, people. I think I'm going to have to dig out those Rubbermaid bins a little earlier this year. Now if I could just scrounge up a few elves to do the work for me...

Back to Normal. Well, as Normal as it Gets, Anyway...

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Sat, 22 Nov 2008 04:36:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip, Extra-Hot Gingerbread Latte

God bless family. My MIL saved my sanity by taking care of the kids while my husband and I went away for a week at the beginning of the month. But, boy... am I done with houseguests!!!

My MIL arrived on the 28th of October, and it's been non-stop revolving door on my guest room since then. My MIL was here until the 16th of this month. While she was here my husband's brother and his family came for a visit. The day after they all left my sister and her family arrived on their way back home from Australia and stayed for the week.

It doesn't sound like a lot when I type it all out, but it's been nearly a month of non-stop houseguests, and I'm kinda glad it's over.

Don't get me wrong - the visits have all been very pleasant. There has been good food, good drink, good conversation, and a bit of sightseeing thrown in for good measure. We even had a couple of birthday parties (Jr.'s 2 now - OMG!). But I'm done with being the hostess. I want to feel ok about just ordering pizza for dinner. I want to sit in front of my tv and watch whatever I want, instead of what my guests enjoy. I want to catch up on my blogging!!!!!

So, here I am. It's Friday night. I'm going to pour myself a drink, do a little blogging, and then catch up on the eleventy-hundred things on my PVR.

Life is good. How about you???

You Find Your Place

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 04:33:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip, Extra-Hot Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha

Do you know what happens when you find yourself slogging through life, day after day, feeling oddly discontented but unable to put your finger on the nature of your problem, sleepwalking your way through your children's lives, missing the big picture because the minute details of everyday living are crowding your field of vision, ignoring the opportunities that present themselves to you every day because you lack the self-confidence and energy necessary to pursue them, avoiding people because, well, it's just easier that way, and then you escape...

to this:

where the scenery looks like this:

and this:

and so on:

....? Do you know what happens?

You come home and you try very hard to put your life back on track. You think a lot about your priorities. You look at your overflowing inbox and you decide that perhaps it's time to respond to some of those emails that have been sitting there for eons, waiting for replies. And it's also time to get your ass off of the hundred thousand mailing lists that are wasting your precious time. You look at your ridiculously overstuffed reader, with it's insane number of blogs you are "following" but never actually reading, and the astonishingly small number of blogs that you actually read regularly. You hit "mark all as read" and watch that feeling of obligation swirl around and around and around and down the drain like used bathwater.

You feel relief.

You then look at each and every one of those blog titles and ruthlessly cut away the excess that threatens to smother you. You know which ones you must save, and you realize that the ones that you may have cut away in error will come back to your attention in due time, proving themselves to be the kind of blogs and bloggers that you need in your life. You know that the people who actually, truly care about you here will understand your need to do so. Particularly if they've actually been patient enough with your rambling, run-on sentences to have read this far.

You look at the ridiculous number of social networking sites to which you belong. You recognize that you are fooling yourself if you think that trying to keep up with all of these is fulfilling your life in any way. You make a plan to whittle these down too. You know that there is no one out there breathlessly waiting for you to tweet or plurk your latest stray thought. You know, too, though, that there are friends out there in Twitter and Plurk land. Perhaps if you knock the list of 20 or so social networks down to these two, you might actually connect with some of them on a more regular basis. Go figure. In economy there may be wealth.

You purge. You declutter. You reorient yourself in your world. You find your place.

And you hope to find peace, happiness and fulfillment.

I sincerely appreciate every single, solitary person who reads this blog. I thank you for reading, I thank you for commenting, I thank you for lurking. I thank you for your private emails checking in on me during my (multiple) absences. I thank you for being my friends. I thank some of you for being more like family.

I thank you, in advance, for understanding while I go through some growing pains around here. It's time.

As the Daylight Wanes...

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 04:20:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat Tazo Chai Latte

The sun has just set over Polo Beach. I sit here in the hotel bar, sipping the last Mai Tai of my vacation, watching as the sky darkens and the tiki torches that line the paths that wind down to the ocean are lit. People are trading their bikinis and sunglasses for cocktail dresses and heels, and the guitarist in the corner plays traditional Hawaiian melodies. There is a soft evening breeze and the scent of flowers wafts through the air.

I am loathe to leave this.

It has been idyllic. Our time here has been restful and healing, rekindling some of the lost romance of our youth with its freedom from responsibility. We have eaten when hungry, slept when tired, and woken when our bodies were rested. We have walked in the sand, swum in the ocean, lounged by the pool. We have driven the coastline, marveled at the landscape, smiled at the hospitality of the people, eaten their traditional foods, enjoyed their music and dancing and climbed their volcano. We have done so much in our week here, and yet so little. We'll have to come back.

I will miss my vacation when the real world pushes its way into my consciousness in a few hours. But not nearly as much as I have missed my babies. I can already hear their cry of "Mommy" tomorrow morning, see their smiling little faces, and feel their little arms around my neck.

Maui has nothing on that.

A Feast for the Senses

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 20:41:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip Pumpkin Spice Latte

(1) The smell of sunscreen.

(2) The sound of the surf.

(3) The feel of the sand between your toes.

(4) The taste of the ice cold umbrella drink in your hand.

(5) The look in the eyes of the one you love as you stroll along the beach.

Look out, Hawaii, here I come.... :)

Into Each Life A Little Rain Must Fall

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 15:29:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Skinny Vanilla Latte

It turns out that if one wishes to share the ups in one's life, then one must also share the downs. Even when one just wants to pull the covers up over one's head and not talk about it. It's the price I must pay for being so happy and excited a week or so ago that I was bursting at the seams and had to share with you all...

Sadly, that little dream has come to an end. I miscarried yesterday. Canadian Thanksgiving. Needless to say, I wasn't feeling particularly thankful.

However, 24 hours have passed and I'm gaining some perspective. And I realize I have a lot to be thankful for:

for yesterday having been a holiday, so my husband was home to care for the kids while I laid in bed and dealt with the pain, both physical and mental
for having a kind and caring husband who does everything he can to make me feel better
for having two amazing children already, whom I love dearly
for having had the opportunity to realize that I do want another baby
for being young and healthy enough to be able to pursue that dream

The list is actually much longer than that, but I won't bore you. What it boils down to is this: I'm disappointed, I'm sad, but in general I'm fine. Into each life, a little rain must fall.

Be still sad heart, and cease repining;
Behind the clouds the sun is shining,
Thy fate is the common fate of all,
Into each life a little rain must fall,
Some days must be dark and dreary.
- Longfellow

Overheard at My House: The Completely Irrelevant Response Edition

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 05:13:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip Pumpkin Spice Latte

Me: Hey! Get your finger out of your nose.

Princess: I need some Cheerios.

Me: And they're hiding in your nose?

The Vacation Correlation

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 05:15:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip, Extra-Hot Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha

*For those who may be wondering: No, I'm not giving up caffeine. In a week or two I won't be able to stomach it. I'm enjoying the last vestiges of my addiction while I still can. :)

So, here I am. Pregnant. Soon to be at the mercy of the whims of my little parasite, who will ensure that every odour is a million times more pungent, that every food is repugnant, and that every pair of my pants no longer fits. Fun times.

The problem with all this? I have a hot pair of tickets to Maui burning a hole in my laptop, and a mother-in-law all set up to watch the children for a week so my husband and I can "reconnect". Yeah, right. Last time I was pregnant I couldn't stand to have him stand close to me, let alone touch me, and I had to change the sheets on our bed every day because the "man smell" he left behind by just sleeping there at night was so overwhelming that I could barely be in the same room. (Shh. Don't tell him I told you that. He has no idea, poor guy.) This went on until I was well out of my first trimester.

I also had plans to sit on a beach chair and sip Mai Tais or Pina Coladas for 7 days. So much for that.

Contemplating our upcoming trip to Hawaii got me to thinking about the other times I've been pregnant. And I came to a surprising realization: me + impending vacation = pregnant. Every time.

Pregnancy #1: Spring 2003. Got pregnant 2 months before a planned trip to New Orleans. Miscarried, had a D&C, and got on a plane 2 days later. To tell the truth, it was good to be away from home for 4 days. Smothering family were making me insane. And the liquor flowed freely in the French Quarter, numbing my broken heart. I haven't been back since, but I'd really like to go and see how my experience differs this time.

Pregnancy #2: Spring 2004. My brother had recently moved to Paris, France, and convinced me that I should come over for a visit. Work commitments kept my husband from joining me, which was sad. Worse? Found out I was pregnant when I was there, and ended up telling my husband over the phone. "Guess what, honey?..." Had the world's worst morning sickness leading to the world's worst transatlantic flight on the way home. Just thinking about it turns my stomach. Not good times. Not good at all.
Two weeks after I got back home my husband and I got on another plane to fly to the Caribbean for a 7-day cruise to celebrate the wedding of good friends. Once again: tropical vacation, no umbrella drinks for me. *sigh*

Pregnancy #3: Spring 2006. Was feeling kind of tired, but not really "pregnant". Had "The Feeling", though, so decided to pee on the stick. Ta da! Got on a plane 2 days later to spend a long weekend with the hubby in Chicago. Had deep dish pizza without beer. Sacrilege.

And so, here I am. Pregnancy #4. Apparently I sealed my fate by booking the trip to Maui. Who knew? (Although if you looked at the other item of commonality on that time line, you would have thought I couldn't get pregnant at any time other than the Spring, wouldn't you?)

Will History Repeat Itself?

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 03:48:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip Pumpkin Spice Latte

So, it's still early days yet. Things are good, uneventful. I like it this way. I pee a little more often, I'm a little more tired, but for the most part I'm just regular old me.

But the day is coming, I'm sure of it.

I've been pregnant 3 times before this. The first time I miscarried, and the other two I carried full term with (thankfully) no complications. But every time I've had wicked morning sickness. Correction: all day sickness.

It usually hits at about 6 weeks. With a vengeance. I literally go from walking around doing my usual thing one minute, to worshipping the porcelain gods on an all-too-frequent basis the next minute. And it hangs on until about 14 weeks, when I wake up one morning and *poof* it's miraculously gone. And the rejoicing begins. And I turn into one of those pregnant women everyone hates - the glowing, little basketball carrying, doesn't look pregnant from behind, totally loves being pregnant type. With boobs! Then I nauseate everyone else. Bygones.

The one good thing about spending most of the first 14 weeks of pregnancy feeling like you want to die? I usually lose 10 lbs before I start to gain anything, so I start the post-pregnancy weight loss challenge ahead. That I can be grateful for. With the princess I was back in my pre-pregnancy jeans at 14 days postpartum, and with Jr. it was 10 days. Woot.

So my plan for the next week or so? Eat anything and everything that looks appetizing. Because it won't be long before I can't stand the look (or even worse, the smell) of anything. And stock up on saltines. I'm fairly certain I'll be needing them. It's been my experience that history repeats itself.

Finally Figuring Out What I Really Want

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 03:14:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat Tazo Chai Latte

I have a wonderful family. I have a husband who loves me and who works enormously hard to allow me the privilege of being a stay-at-home mother. I have a beautiful, captivating, incredibly smart little girl who will soon turn 4. I have a handsome, funny, sensitive and generous little boy who will turn 2 even sooner. They make my heart sing every day. I have a fat and lazy cat, but he likes to cuddle with me and purr, so I love him too.

And yet, I have had persistent doubts about whether or not this picture of my family is complete. I have wondered if perhaps we should have another child. My husband and I have debated this topic for about a year, since I stopped breastfeeding Jr. and my periods returned. We've gone back and forth, over and over again. We know we have all the love required to bring another child into our lives, and we know we have the means to raise a family of 3 children. But, we've been unsure whether or not we can handle the chaos that another child brings. We've wondered if perhaps being outnumbered by the little people in our house is a bad idea. We've thought about how close we are to being permanently out of diapers and away from sleepless nights.

But we've been unable to say definitively "We're done."

So, we've been kind of laissez-faire about it all. We've said, "We'll see what happens." We've not really been trying, but we've not actively been preventing pregnancy either. It's the chicken's way out - let nature decide if we have another child, right? If it's meant to be, it will happen.

The months have passed, and I think I've felt compelled to pee on a stick all of 3 times. Negative every time. And I've been ok with that - in truth, I never really suspected I was pregnant. I have slightly irregular periods, so it wasn't a big deal to be a day or two late. I never had "The Feeling", which I have had every other time I've been pregnant. And a couple of other times too. "The Feeling" is a bit imprecise. Which is why I'm not trademarking it and making millions. Oh well.

But, lo and behold, "The Feeling" cropped up a couple of weeks ago. In fact, the morning after a little bit of the horizontal mambo. I kinda thought maybe the deed had been done. I started to feel a little twinge of excitement. It was little, but it was there. But, naturally, since no one has come up with a "day after" pregnancy test yet, I had to wait.

I did, however, go to Costco and buy the 3-pack of pregnancy tests for the price of just one test at my local drug store (imagine!). And then I waited some more. My period was due on Friday, but by Monday night I could wait no longer.

Negative. Damn. "That's ok," I thought. After all, there's only about a 50% chance of a positive test 4 days before your period is due. I still had a chance. And I was quickly coming to realize that maybe I really did want it to be positive. (Had you figured that out yet? I'm a little slow apparently.)

I didn't say anything to my husband. I didn't say anything to anyone. I held my hopes close to my chest, feeling them grow exponentially every day.

I was going to wait till Friday. After all, what's a couple of days really? And, if my period showed up on schedule, I could save the other 2 tests. Waste not, want not, right?

I made it to Thursday. I was just about to take the Princess to ballet when some ridiculous notion in my head told me to pee on the stick just before we left. I managed to wrangle a little privacy, ran to the bathroom, and peed on the stick.

Nothing. Crap. Now I was disappointed. If it was going to be positive, it should have been positive by now. 93% of pregnancies will show positive on the day before the period is due, according to the package. Crap.

We went off to ballet, and I stewed over it for the next hour. I was disappointed. Not tearful, not depressed. Just disappointed.

But I was happy, too. Because "The Feeling", and my reaction to it, had shown me that I really did want another baby. I really did want to be pregnant again, terrible morning sickness and all. I really did want to have the chance to hold a newborn close to my breast, feel it suckle, smell it's little head. I wanted my Princess and Jr. to have another little brother or sister. I wasn't done.

I'm not done.

And it's a good thing, too. 'Cuz when I got home I found this waiting for me on the bathroom counter:

Overheard at My House: The Crayola Edition

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 22:47:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip, Extra-Hot Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha

Observing the Princess engaged in her ambitious project of "drawing the whole world", which apparently involves a lot of sea creatures...

Me: Don't colour on your forehead.

Princess: I'm not, I'm just thinking with this crayon.

Today There's a Little Less Cute in the World

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 00:43:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Skinny Vanilla Latte

Have you ever seen this adorable video on YouTube of sea otters holding hands at the Vancouver Aquarium?

Nyac, one of those two otters, was a star attraction at the Vancouver Aquarium. I've seen her many, many times. She was the oldest otter at the Aquarium, having been brought there after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in 1989. She was one of the few young survivors of that disaster. Sadly, she died yesterday at 20 years of age.

20 years is toward the upper limit of the life span of a female sea otter, but what is particularly poignant about her death is the fact that she was recently found to have chronic lymphocytic leukemia. This illness has never before been reported in sea otters, according to the veterinarians at the Aquarium. However, there has been a link in other species between exposure to petroleum and this disease. So, it would seem that one of the most significant environmental disasters of the 80's is still claiming it's victims. Very sad.

So, today, there's a little less cute in the world. RIP Nyac, we'll miss you on our next visit to the Aquarium.

The Gap Thinks It's Carly Simon

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 03:38:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip Pumpkin Spice Latte

So, last time we all convened here, I told you how much I weighed. Now, prepare to be astonished further as I tell you what size pants I wear.

Are you ready for this?

I'm gonna make you wait a little. There's backstory here...

A couple of weeks ago I did a little Fall shopping at the Gap. I like the Gap - reasonably priced, their cuts seem to fit me well, and it's not too dressed-down or dressed-up for the SAHM lifestyle. Jeans, sweaters, some cute tops, and the odd jacket. Most of my wardrobe owes a debt of gratitude to the Gap.

When I got home I realized I was getting low on hangers in my closet. What's a girl to do? Reorganize. Translation: bag up the stuff I haven't worn in a year and give it to charity. I figured it was a good time to pack up most of the summer stuff in Rubbermaid bins (oh, how I love those things) and dig out my more wintry stuff. Hello change of seasons, here we come!

Turns out that there were a bunch of things in my Winter clothes bin that I hadn't worn in eons. I decided to try on some of the more classic styles to see if I should keep anything. Lo and behold, a couple of pairs of pants I bought a few years ago were size 10. Now admittedly, they were too big. But not a lot too big. I haven't changed that much in a couple of years. I certainly haven't shrunk. My abs are less toned, so I would actually think I should be more generous around the waist, not less. Certainly I shouldn't have just bought size 6 jeans and a size 4 skirt at the Gap a few hours ago.

What's going on, you ask? The Gap has sunk to a merchandising low: vanity sizing.

This obviously has ocurred gradually over time, because I hadn't really noticed that I wasn't changing but my pants size was! Now that I look back, I realize that I wore size 8 jeans for a while, and now I'm down to a 6, but I don't think my body has really changed much. I've been running around after two small kids, but I haven't been working out (until the last couple of weeks), so there's no reason to suspect that I've actually changed sizes. The sizes have changed.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. I mean, I've heard of vanity sizing in the past, and I never gave it a second thought. I was all like "oh, yeah, what's there to complain about?" But now I realize that it's probably not a good thing. While I enjoy buying a size 6, I don't really feel like I've earned that pleasure. And, more frightening in this time of increasing obesity and related health problems, there are millions of women out there who are gaining weight but saying to themselves "It's ok, I'm still a size 10. I'm not fat, I wore a 10 when I was in college!" They're deluding themselves and the world of "ready to wear" fashion is helping. Not good.

So, I'm curious to know if anyone else has noticed this happening... if so, what do you think of it? Has it affected you? Positively or negatively? Or am I crazy for even caring? Should I just take my size 6 and be happy about it????

Are You Gonna Eat That?

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 05:24:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip Pumpkin Spice Latte

I am hungry. I am hungry all the time lately. It's crazy.

I'm not a person who's ever cared much about her weight. I'm not exactly skinny, but I'm no lumbering cow either. (Although, after seeing a cow being mounted by a bull in a field while driving in my car the other day, I have a whole new respect for cows. Holy schlong, Batman.) I'm 5'6" and have a small to average frame on which I carry anywhere from 135-140 lbs generally, which gives me a "healthy" BMI of roughly 22. (Yes, I just put my weight on the internet. I must be on crack.) I could stand to lose 10 lbs, but hey, who couldn't?

I've never been on a real diet in my life. I went through that anorexic, eat only popsicles phase when I was in high school, but I wouldn't exactly call that dieting. I consider myself lucky to have never really needed to monitor what I eat, or deprive myself in any way. All that being said, I make an effort not to eat like a cow. Or a whole cow at one sitting. (I seem to have cows on the brain. Really, you should have seen the size of that thing. Wow.) I try to eat reasonably healthily, but I usually fail miserably. I eat too much bread and refined sugar. I have a serious weakness for potato chips. I do manage to eat fruit and vegetables, but in nowhere near the number that the Canada Food Guide recommends. I drink a lot of coffee. I'm chronically dehydrated because coffee is largely the only thing that I drink. (Maybe if I smoked I could be a supermodel.)

Where was I going with all this? Oh yeah...

Anyway, lately I have been massively hungry. Eat a whole cow kind of hungry.

You see, I recently started going to the gym. Many, many, many moons ago I used to go to the gym fairly regularly. This was before I had children who ate up every spare second of the day. (And then some.) This was actually before I did my residency, during which time there was no such thing as a spare second. (There's a reason why the motto for residency is: Eat when you can, sleep when you can, pee when you can. You never really know when you might get the opportunity again. Funnily enough, people don't stop dying because you haven't eaten in 12 hours. Go figure.)

Where was I?

Right. Going to the gym. I realized quite a while ago that I was getting no exercise whatsoever. (Not that chasing a toddler and a preschooler isn't exercise, but it's not quite what I was thinking of.) This wasn't an issue from a weight point of view, for the reasons I outlined above. Although I could really use a little toning on that mommy tummy I have. The bigger issues for me were that I was tired all the time and I was yelling at my kids all the time. I realized that both of these things could be solved by exercise. Going to the gym would give me (1) time for myself, (2) more energy, and (3) an outlet for my stress. It seemed like a great idea. Sadly, it took more than 6 months to get off my ass and make it happen. But, better late than never, right?

So, I've been going to the gym fairly regularly since the beginning of the month. I'm not in as bad a shape as I thought I was, which was a pleasant surprise. Turns out that I can do 30 mins of fairly intense cardio without wanting to die. And I can actually remember how to use some of the weight equipment without looking like a total dork. Most of the time.

But there have been 2 unexpected side effects to this new exercise regime. I'm hungry all the time (have I mentioned that?) and I constantly need to pee. I'm eating constantly, which must be completely negating every calorie I burn at the gym. *sigh* And I have to pee 800 times a day due to the extra water I'm drinking when I work out. Remember the part up there where I said I spend my life chronically dehydrated? Well, the bonus to that is that I only had to pee a couple times a day. Completely tolerable. Now I need to pee all the time, and it's driving me bananas. Minor problems in the grand scheme of things, I know, but driving me batty no less. Bygones.

So, anyway, the short story (if you've bothered to read this far) is that I'm trying to get my sorry body into some sort of shape that doesn't resemble gelatinous goo. I'm hoping that it will make me feel more attractive in a bikini by the time our Hawaii trip rolls around. Maybe if things go well I'll even buy a new bathing suit. I'll keep you up on my progress. Maybe there will even be pictures. Of the bathing suits, not of me in them. What do I look like? Some kind of nutter? I'm willing to post my weight on the internet and tell you about how often I pee, but there's no way in hell I'll share shots of me in a bathing suit. Not a chance. :)

Um, What's a Goober?

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 05:47:00 +0000

Today's order: Venti Anniversary Blend with Extra Cream

So I went out on a hot, international date tonight. You might have heard about it. I was a little disappointed by the lack of cavity searches taking place, but the Tar-jay action more than made up for it.

Total wait time at the border? Nearly an hour.
Company? Fantastic.
Starbucks lattes consumed? None. *gasp*
Number of times we questioned MapQuest's directions? Numerous.
Number of U-turns made? I lost count.
Drinks consumed? One chocolate martini and one zippy zinfandel.
Slabs of red meat? Two, medium rare.
Tubs of popcorn? One, but it was ridiculously large.
Introductions to obscene movie pleasures involving popcorn and chocolate? One, and she'll curse me for it later. ;)
Number of pee breaks? Only two. (I know, I'm shocked too.)
Frequency with which we incredulously asked "What was Meg Ryan thinking?" Every 30 seconds.
Ultimate verdict on the movie? Surprisingly good.
Ultimate verdict on the date? So, when are we going again?

Thanks for the great time! *mwah, mwah* See you when the monster-in-law gets into town? *grin*

It's Funny 'Cuz It's True

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 15:03:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Non-Fat, No-Whip Pumpkin Spice Latte

Tina Fey for Vice-President!

(Apparently my laptop has Republican leanings. I've tried 30 times to embed this video, and every time my computer crashes. So just go watch it. You'll be glad you did.)

***Edited to add: So how many people out there think Tina Fey is secretly voting Republican in this election, just so she can get to do that for the next four years? Yeah, me too! :)

Love Is In the Air

lattemommy@gmail.com (lattemommy) — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 05:19:00 +0000

Today's order: Grande Skinny Vanilla Latte, Extra-Hot

This weekend I was surprised and honoured to receive an award from not one, but two bloggers! My cup runneth over!

Whiney Momma and Denise RMT both gave me this adorable little doodle:

Whiney Momma and Denise RMT are both pretty new to me, so in the spirit of new friendships, I'd like to pass this award on to some great bloggers I've really just gotten to know this past summer (even though it already seems like I've been reading their blogs forever!).

Janet at From the Planet of Janet - Janet's kids are all grown up now, but she still has tons of hilarious stories about them. Apparently the trials and tribulations of parenthood aren't confined to the preschool years. Who knew?!?

Kelley at Magneto Bold Too - You never know what you're going to get when you read one of Kelley's posts. You may need to change your underwear because you laughed so hard you peed your pants. You may need a kleenex to wipe a tear from your eye. You may need to buy a new pair of shoes because her fabulous ones make you throw yours in the garbage in shame. You may need to go on a trans-continental trek to find out what a clinker tastes like... whatever you may need, you'll definitely need more Kelley on a regular basis.

VDog at VDog and Little Man - VDog is shakin' up the internetz with a little glimpse of the cracker. You'll love her. And that little curly-headed blond boy she hangs with. Go now - you'll see why.

Jim at The Busy Dad Blog - Jim has cracked the blogging glass ceiling (you didn't know it worked in reverse for daddy bloggers, did you?) and was recently named to the Hot Blogger Calendar. But his real claim to fame is his Iron Chef title-holding, Lego-wielding adorable son Fury. Just doesn't get any better than a kid who can invent Lego Mr. Lady. Really.

Ok, you can go now. Read them, love them, tell 'em I sent ya! :)