Letters To Pushkin | Letters Shared by Others

A letter to Kittie

2013-05-16T13:26:05Z

I never thought about writing a letter to you until today when i read it in a magazine. I thought it was the best idea. You were my companion for 20 years and when I had to put you down it broke my heart.

You didn't have the best life. You were so timid and everything that came along seem to scare you. We first lived with my mom and my sister's children those children I think used to torment you terribly when I wasn't around to protect you. Then we went to live with my boyfriend and he loved you. But you were my cat and you really never took him. Then we left my boyfriend, and we moved to Sacramento and we stayed with my friend for two months. I can only assume that this was quite unnerving to you because there was a cat and 2 dogs in the house and you had never been around animals since you were a baby. Then we moved back to Washington and we eventually settled in our on place about a year later. We were here until it was time for you to pass on.

The last year I could see was pretty hard for you. You slowly lost your site and had kidney disease which required you to take pills and get IV fluids on a daily basis. I am so sorry it took me so long to figure out you wouldn't leave me without my helping you.

I tried to make up for all the trauma that you received living my life by spoiling you rotten. I know of no other cat that would get a Costco chicken every other week. Even after the doctor told me that you had to be on special food I still gave you the chicken because I figured it was better that you eat and enjoy it in the time you had left them to starve to death.

I miss you so much Kittie you were my companion through 20 years of my life. You loved me unconditionally and I miss our time together. Now I am alone and I sometimes think maybe I should get another cat. But, I think I will never have a companion like you. You were so good to me and you endured so much living my life with me. I miss our cuddle time. I miss when I wasn't feeling well and you knew and tried to make me feel better. I miss your long-haired getting in my crochet projects. I miss your playfulness. I miss watching your sleep. You used squeak when you slept it was so funny. I miss you kitty! I love you so much! You will always always be my companion and tlhe love I have for you will never go away. I know i will see you again because you are my family. For now Heavenly Father will watch over you. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

A letter to Rocks

2013-04-29T21:03:16Z

I can't believe its been a year today since you left us. For some weird reason I have been waiting for today and now that its here, I don't know what to say. So I will just say what I would if you were here right now: I miss you, everyday & I still think of you everyday. I miss your kisses, our cuddling, the way you loved your ball, how you would quickly run back to the other side of the gate and hope I didn't notice! (I saw you every time!) I still cry alone and try to remember that you don't want me to be sad, but my heart still aches :(

I felt so cheated that you were taken away from us so soon and sudden. You were a great dog and friend. You were so sweet, loving, and innocent. You never deserved what happened to you. I also felt like I cheated you. I cheated you out of walks, all those times you wanted to play and I was simply to lazy. I can't help but to feel guilty. If I could do it all over I would.

I of course will not remember you for how you left us but for all the wonderful memories and love you brought me. I could never thank you enough. You taught me so much about loyalty and how I need to appreciate the moments I have with the one I love the most and not take them for granted.

I want you to know you will always be part of our family, you will always be my dog, you will always have your paw print deeply engraved into my heart. I hope your having fun up in heaven and regardless if it's in a dream or in heaven I can't wait until the day I see you again.

"And since you've gone I can't forget
what I didn't say that it's much too late
I feel you here in my heart but sometimes I fall
I gotta crawl in the dark" - Saves The Day

A letter to Bently Beagle

2013-04-23T00:17:22Z

God be with you at Rainbow Bridge, my beloved Bently. You were my first-born (first-adopted). I loved you more than life itself. I miss you more than you will ever know. You taught me so much about life, love, & happiness. The pain & torment of your all-too-sudden departure is more than I can handle at times. Please don’t forget me as you roam the glorious fields of your spiritual world. I’m so sorry if there was something I could have done to save your life. They tell me a blood clot broke off and caused instant heart failure. Your water & food dishes are next to the stand by my bed if your spirit is ever hungry or thirsty. Gracie & Morgan send their love. Gracie still yaps too much. The puppy continues his crazy antics at times. Uncle Paul sorely misses you. All of the ladies at Bishop St House send their love. Hugs & kisses my sweet, loveable prince.

A letter to Sampson

2013-04-15T01:10:56Z

Hey love. You've been gone for three days now, and I miss you so much. You were my heart...my soul. You were the love of my life. I don't know what to do with myself...my routine for the past 15 years is gone. I love you so much. Taking you to the vet and having you put down was the most painful thing I have ever had to do in my life. I knew it was time...you were starting to suffer...but that doesn't make it any less painful. If only. If only one more day...one more hour...one more minute. You were scared when we went to the vet...you always were...and I feel like I let you down. I feel like I failed you. I know I didn't, but I feel that way. I'm sorry, my love. I'm so, so sorry. My heart aches at the thought of it, and I hope you forgive me. I hope you are resting peacefully over the Rainbow Bridge.

Thank you, my friend. Thank you for the love and joy you shared with me. Thank you for allowing me to be part of your life. I watched a video yesterday of when I picked you up from Debbie's after a trip. You were SO happy...your face smiling...you were bouncing all around the yard. You were just pure joy! Thank you for the smiles, my friend, and so many fond memories that will always make me smile. I was so blessed to have you in my life.

I went to the Refuge today. I went to the places we used to go...the boardwalk...Morgan Prairie. I missed having you with me...so much. I had to go...to grieve...to miss...to remember. I spread some of Quan's and Buddy's ashes at the Prairie where I already spread some of my mom's ashes, and will spread some of your ashes, too. It's a beautiful, magical place...just as you are a beautiful and magical soul.

You will always be wherever my heart is. I miss you, my friend. I miss you, my best friend. I feel like a part of me is gone, but I know that's not true. It just feels that way right now. You are completely within me...in my heart...in my soul. Forever.

Missing you, loving you, hugging you, and giving you big kisses.

My love for you is beyond words...

A letter to Nadir

2013-04-14T23:37:19Z

Nadir....My sweet Nadir.
You were the first thing I ever had. You came before furniture and utensils. It was you and I curling up together on a floor in a vermin infested apartment when I left home to go to school.
You never had the best life. I was always moving, but I always took you with me. You never complained.
I bought a house and we were finally content. You told me that you were sick when you were 14..:(
I hope that you forgive me for putting you down.
You were ready. When we were at the vets, you put your sweet face in my hand and closed your eyes. I still cry about you ten years later and miss you from the core of my soul.
I love and miss you Bubbies.

A letter to Kholee

2013-04-14T22:19:39Z

First let me Thank You for spending 18 yrs with me in this world.I know you are only gone in the physical sense and that should be of comfort to me,but it is not.When I found you as a puppy running along the road my heart went out to you. Right from the beginning I knew you were going to be a challenge which I gladly accepted.We were both so unsure of it all and wondering if we were right for eachother. I never gave up on you and I knew we were going to be together forever and love each other beyond words. Kholee I just want to know if you were happy here with me and if I gave you enough ? You were the only constant in my life and my best friend. Who ever would have thought that you the emaciated, scared ,abused beautiful puppy would turn into a gorgeous loyal companion. You were and always will be my insides. The day I lost you was one of the hardest days of my life. I know it was the right time and you were ready to go. So be free my bestie and be the dog you were always meant to be.

A letter to Taylor

2013-04-12T20:44:41Z

Sixteen years ago you came into my life. You were so small and so sick, the vet didn't think you would make it but you proved him wrong. You were the best companion a person could have. Always by my side, loving me. You even liked to lick my hair as if you we're grooming another cat! You were the one constant through my life. The one thing I knew I could count on to be there. Through marriage, divorce, moving, 2 kids (8yrs apart), and another marriage, you weathered it all with grace and love. I will always remember the time when I was recovering from surgery and you only left the bed when I feel asleep. It's amazing how you knew what I needed, sometimes even before I did. I'm am sorry if you had been sick for awhile before I knew it. Even up to the end you were affectionate and playful. The night we lost you, even though you were trying to be your old self, I knew something was wrong. I knew when we took you to the vet that you were not coming back home with us. I am glad I got to say goodbye to you. I wanted to make sure that you knew how grateful I was for the time I had with you. That's why I kept saying "thank you". I couldn't think of anything else, beside I love you, that you needed to hear.

Goodbye sweet girl.

A letter to Tek

2013-03-19T04:36:39Z

You weren't merely my dog, and you weren't merely my best friend. You were a part of my heart, and easily the biggest and best part of my life. From the moment I brought you home, I loved and cared about you more than I did anyone else, and that hasn't changed since the moment you died beside me--my hand stroking the fur on the back of your neck--almost four months ago.

While friends have told me not to feel guilt, and to only remember the good times you and I shared, the truth is that I wasn't always what you deserved. The times I took you for granted, or was too tired to take you for a walk, or too preoccupied with something silly to accept your invitation to play fetch, or wasting my time with someone that didn't care about me when I should have been with you, you seemed to only have one desire: to be directly by my side.

I always thought there would be more time, and I was always preparing for a better future. Not that you could understand me, but I promised you so many times that "better days were ahead". Days in which we'd have a bigger home, you'd have a backyard in which to play, I'd have more free time, and we'd have someone else with us that would love the two of us. I was too foolish to understand that there was no need to look ahead to "better days", because the life we had with one another was perfect. Everything was just right the way it was, because I was with you. If only I had known then what I know now.

I would not be the person I am today if it were not for you. You were there during the lowest periods of my life. No matter the depths of my depression, and no matter how worthless I felt I was, in your eyes there existed no one better. You looked to me for guidance, protection, food, a set of rules, and most of all, for love. I realized that. You likely didn't realize that there were many times that I looked to you for a reason to get up in the morning. There were many instances in which you were the only thing that tethered me to sanity.

Speaking of which, I'm surprised I didn't lose my mind after you were taken from me, particularly in those first few days when waking up brought with it the painful reminder you were gone, or the two-and-a-half months in which I had to unlock and walk through the front door of my old apartment without hearing you bark, seeing you spin, and being greeted before I could remove my coat. I'm proud of myself for keeping it together during the cold nights spent in my queen-sized bed in which my fuzzy, twenty-pound, brown-eyed "space heater" isn't there in your usual spot directly to my right, your back pressed against my chest, my left arm draped over you.

I miss our naps on the living room floor. I miss removing the goop from your eyes, and wiping your perennially runny nose. I miss the way you would stand guard over me--practically DARING anyone to come near me--when I was sick. I miss the way you hated any female that tried to get close to me. I miss seeing the confused concern in your face whenever you saw me cry, and the way you would leap to my side and burrow your head underneath my arm during those times. I miss your ornery demeanor, your peculiar habits, your stinky feet, your bony butt, your general distrust of all of humanity, and those soulful, loving, beautiful brown eyes. I miss you, Tek. I miss you every single day.

I want you to know that I will almost certainly share my life with another dog someday, and I will love him or her with all my heart. There stands a good chance that I will even allow another sheltie into my life. But I promise you with everything that I am, and I swear on your life, my life, and the life we shared together, that I will never replace you. You will always be my dog. When I die, I want my last thoughts to be of you.

A letter to Ralphie

2013-03-06T23:00:48Z

I miss and love you each day and feel so guilty that I did not know you were sick and did not know that I did not have much time left with you. I would have done so much more for and with you. I had just had Blake, my first born, and it was overwhelming and all consuming and as a result I fear I neglected you near the end due to the Baby. Kyle says I didn't since he was here to walk you but I feel I did because since I was taking care of my infant and neborn son, I was unable to walk you so I missed out on spending more time with you near the end and did not really know we were even nearing your end.:( For that I am so sorry.:( I love and miss you so much it hurts. The thought of never seeing you again, never holding you again, never looking for you to follow me to each room, throughout the house, etc. is just devastating for me. I'd hoped you and Blakey could have had some good years together instead I feel like I was robbed of you too soon. I try to hold on to the good memories but it's so hard because all I focus on is my pain and hurt at losing you. I had you 14 years, you lived a nice long happy life with me but I want more. I wish you could have lived with me all of my life but unfortunately life does not work that way.:'-( I pray you were happy with me and I pray you knew how much I loved you. I pray you really are in Doggie Heaven looking down upon me with a smile that God willing we will reunite again one day. I love and miss you always Ralphie, there will only ever be one you. It's the end of an era, the closing of a chapter, with you passing away. Now I have a 4 month old Baby Boy and a Husband of nearly two years. You were with me throughout my turbulent single years. I'd gotten you when I was 25, shortly after returning from Panama (the Country) and now I am 39. You didn't make it to be 15 (you died at 14 years and 6 months) or make it to see me turn 40 or to see Blake turn 1 but you were always there for me when no one else was. You saw many people walk in and out of my life from Boyfriends to female friends and associates but you were always that one constant that loved me uncondiionally no matter what and never left my side. I cry as I write this because I miss you so much. What I wouldn't give to look down, on the floor, and see you curled up at the bottom of the bed, near my feet, as you always did. I love and miss you Ralphie Hayes (Gooden) and I always will. Muuuuuah, Mommy will always love you. You were my First Baby and prepared me for Motherhood. Now I have a real Baby and I learned to be responsible for another living being, through you.:) It was just you and I for nearly 15 years.:) You will always be in my heart, mind and prayers. I got your remains cremated and put in a nice Urn with little paws going around the top side so you also will always be with me physically.:) Even when I pass, I want you buried with me.:) I will request, in my will, that your Urn be placed in my casket with me.:( I will always love and miss you Ralphie.:)

Love Always,

Your Second Mommy (second only to your Birth Mommy)

A letter to Henry Hobson Schimming

2013-03-06T19:27:46Z

That name says so much! Such a regal, gentle dog you were. I cannot believe that you have been gone a year.
I still have your pillow beside the bed and wake up many mornings wishing you'd come upstairs and push the door open, look to see if your Mama and Daddy are asleep and take that deep breath and sigh because we're not awake. I miss having my riding buddy, ready to go anywhere with just an invitation of "Do you want to ride?" Funny how you'd be the first one out of the door and would not have to be told twice to get in the car.
I asked Daddy one day "when God was going to send us another Henry?" and the next day our prayer was answered. Edgar showed up just like you did, is a pit with a heart of gold just like you, loves to go on walks, he is so much like you, we truly believe that your essence is a part of him. Sometimes he cuts that look at me with those big black eyes and I would swear that you are sitting there looking at me. He reminds me so much of you when he lays on his back and sticks his feet in the air as if to say "ahhhh!". We could not ask for a sweeter dog, unless it was you.
Just please know that we miss you so much and not a day goes by the we do not think about you. I know that one day soon we will meet on the rainbow bridge and we'll never have to say goodbye again.
We love you son.

A letter to Dillon

2013-03-04T19:46:20Z

Four and 1/2 years wasn't long enough. I am still in shock that you are gone. Your illness was brief and you did not suffer so I am very thankful for that. I have read the "coping with loss" words and they say to remember good times. There were so many great times in your time spent with me. I remember driving to Austin to pick you up from the rescue. You were so very thin and you were so frightened .. you pooped in the car on the way home! Your first baths were comical ... you were so scared and pooped in the tub. Thank goodness you got used to baths! I loved teaching you what a toy was and how to play. I loved to watch you run ... and boy could you run! You and your best friend Kimber would sound like small ponies running through the fields. You possessed a soft and gentle spirit. So, so gentle.... watching you play with a puppy or kitten would melt anyone's heart. I will miss the way you would come up to me and lay your head in my lap inviting me to rub your sweet, sweet face. My favorite thing about you was your soulful eyes. When you looked at me, your eyes told me how much you loved me. I will miss the way you greeted me with a long low howl. I will miss the way you would stand up with your front paws on the back door to ask to be let in. I will miss your wagging body and all that hair!

A letter to Yuki

2013-02-27T23:10:54Z

You left us yesterday morning and this house is so empty without you.
I know that you died the best way it could be, sleeping, you fought just about one month with heart cancer, but didn't had any sympoms , so you were so blessed that you didn't suffer.
But I' m here complete lost without you in the house by my side....you were my baby, my world, my love one for 9 years, helping me heal from my mom's death, and so many others hard times, and i took care of all your skin, eye, ears etc problems, and after 4 or 5 cirguries that you to go thru, with all my love and I would do it again a million times if needed....you are sooo missed....so loved....I really can't get over been away from you right now....I've crying since I heard your last breath.
Sometimes i get desperated just to think I will never hold you in my arms and kiss you ever again.....it is killing me right now......
I always was so afraid of the time you have to leave us, and now here we are...and I don't know what to do. I can't even take your bed or your things away. I look for you all the time in the house, your cat bro is looking for you as well.....everytime i go to the bathroom , the kitchen, the room, the tv room, I wait for you to follow me, yesterday i was looking for you to call you to go to bed with us....dad is missing you a lot too...but he is all strong bc he sees that he needs to be there for me...but he is suffering a lot.
He is the only one that makes me feel a litlle better....
I remember your happy dance when we invated you to go for a walk everyday, and how you didn't let us forget to walk you in the end of the day crying and winning untill someone take you for the loved walk....that was the thing you loved the most ..not even food or a petting you was better than go for a walk.....
It is good to remember how happy you were when we got back from a long trip and how you demonstrated that you weren't happy that we left you for so long....bitting me very softly teeling me that you didn't like it....
How a good companian you were when we sleep untill late and you loved to stay in bed with us...oh you really loved your bed right beside me.... I remember when you were a pupy i had to give you all your food in my hands bc you didn't like to eat, and when you grow up we had to play that we were going to catch your food so you would eat.....and when we didn't you asked us to do so , winning......ah my love there are so many memories that i could write for hours.....i love you more than anything, i would give everything i have to have you back here with me.....be in peace my love, i know you are in dogs heaven bc you just had love inside you, nothing more, you were the most kind dog ever....
Hope we will meet again than i can embrace and kiss your face as i always did and i miss so much to do it again......my baby boy, my little one.....
My beloved baby, i loved you everyday of my life more than anyone could love you, and i always will....you will be forever in my heart.
I'm devasted right now, but someday it will be easier to live without you...i hope.....
Sorry about my poor english , we are from Brazil, but the pain and the grief is the same.....hurts the same.....
Right now I'm 4 moths pregnant of twins and I dreamed before to see my Yuki playing with the kids at hone...bc he loved sooooo much children.....now I don't know anything anymore.....i just miss him too much....

A letter to Heidi

2013-02-20T23:23:12Z

We were together for 6 years, not nearly long enough, you were the perfect lap sitter and kept me great company in bed when I was under the weather or just wanted a nap. You loved sharing a chair in front of the TV with your "Pa" and he loved you dearly. You had mastered the "art" of hi-5ing and did it often. I will miss the sound of your little "flipper" feet running down the hallway..and the click of your toenails as you make your way up the steps..you loved your food..I found myself starting to set out your biscuits on a plate the morning after you left us..I couldn't stop my tears or heartache..Your friend Beacon has been looking and listening for you..she is beginning to understand you are not coming back to us..she will miss your games of tug o' war with the various ropes you two accumulated..You were her best friend and have been there for her since she was a puppy..We all are grieving and will miss the sunshine of your presence in our lives..If I have learned one thing from you, dearest Heidi.. it is to live as you did..loving life and everyone in it..for a not very big dog..your passing has left a huge emptiness in our hearts and our home..we love you Heidi..always, your Ma and Pa and Beacon

A letter to Logan

2013-02-16T21:59:48Z

Your passing has been one of the hardest things I have had to face in many years. Maybe since my father passed. Ironic that you left us on the 24th anniversary of Dad's death. I'm hoping you both are together and can see me and the family. We miss you terribly. I am devstated without you. So I wrote you this poem to hopefully let you know how special you are and how much you mean to me:

For Logan, my Faithful Amber Paw

I’m running at a weary pace between the rising and setting sun,
I toil for kin, hearth and pay until my long labor is done.
And most days I can’t tell you did I win, lose or draw?
But everyday meets a cheery end greeted by my faithful Amber Paw.

It’s in those rare few moments when from the world outside I hide,
I sit with my fine furred companion in silence at my side.
When stress and debt and worries wrack the stillness of my night,
I snuggle with my Amber Paw and life just feels alright.

The toll this life takes is dear, and it weighs upon my soul,
But Amber Paw, any time you’re near, your friendship makes me whole.
So many people take from me; sometimes it’s hard to live,
But you my faithful Amber Paw know only how to give.

Though many say you’re just a cat, I see a depth in your golden eyes,
You rest your tawny chin upon my hand and I suddenly realize.
You look at me with love like I’m the Dad that you adore,
From you my faithful Amber Paw, I couldn’t ask for more.

Now the years have got behind us, and both our whiskers have gone gray,
Yes, I knew this time would come, but I begged this day away.
Though your spirit was unfettered, your flesh began to tire,
Yet even when you were feeling down, you never failed to inspire.

I selfishly prayed for more time with you and that your love would always stay,
Still, life’s toll is far too steep, and your bright spirit was called away.
I can’t conceive of life without you my furry, faithful friend,
Your legacy is endless, and I know our Love will never end.

Left in the silence of my lonely room your still body at my side,
Many tears of loss and joy I’ve shed that I surely will not hide.
Now I dream of that great day when our souls are reunited,
In the company of God, family and friends we’ll forever be delighted.

You filled my days with warmth and fun that have left me full of awe,
Now you’re running with the shining Son, my faithful Amber Paw.
I pray the Love we shared in this life will carry me back Home,
And someday I will join you there and forever we will roam…

Love and miss you always Logan

A letter to BRANDY

2013-02-14T00:02:31Z

I JUST WANTED TO TRY AND TELL YOU WHAT YOU MEANT TO ME IN MY LIFE AND HOW MUCH JOY YOU BROUGHT TO ME. YOU CAME TO ME AT A TIME WHEN I NEEDED TO SEE A LOVING FACE AND HAVE LITTLE LOVING KISSES. YOU BROUGHT SO MUCH JOY TO ME AND THERE IS SUCH AN EMPTY SPACE IN MY HEART SINCE YOU HAVE GONE. PEOPLE SAY OH YOU WILL GET OVER IT BUT THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEANT TO ME. YOU WERE MY BABY. I DID GET ANOTHER DOG BUT IT IS NOT THE SAME. I LOVE HER AND SHE IS A GOOD DOG BUT THERE WILL ALWAYS BE ONLY ONE BRANDY. YOU WERE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE AS STRANGE AS THAT MAY SOUND TO OTHERS BUT YOU FILLED A VOID THAT NO ONE OR ANYTHING CAN EVER DO AGAIN. SO MY DEAR FREIND BELEIVE ME WHEN I SAY THAT YOU WILL ALWAYS HOLD A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART. ALSO THAT EVERY TIME I THINK OF YOU IT STILL BRINGS A TEAR TO MY EYE BUT IT ALSO BRINGS A SMILE TO MY FACE FOR ALL THE HAPPINESS YOU BROUGHT TO MY LIFE .

A letter to Lucy-Lou

2013-02-09T05:08:03Z

I guess you have been gone for a few days now, but we just found out that you really were gone today. When you went missing, we were hoping that you were stuck in some ones shed or something, we were hoping that the worst wasnt reality. You were such a special kitty, you have to be the friendlyest cat I've ever had. It's hard to believe that im never going to call your name and watch you come running again...

You were taken way too soon, only a year old. I love you Lucy-Lou

until we meet again.

A letter to Rhody

2013-02-07T20:08:18Z

My dearest baby girl Rhody I found you on I-95 when you where not even nine months old. Abandoned, beaten, sick and scared I thought I would rescue you that day but you spent ten years rescuing me.

“You need to think with your head and not with your heart, we have to put her down” they said but I fought so hard for you and you fought harder for me through the years.

My best friend, soul mate, love, muse, comedian, lover of all people, hairy four-legged daughter you brought me and your big brother Rockstar such tremendous joy.

Please remember you will always be in my heart until we meet again and I hope you know how much I love you. My bed, I mean your bed, will never be as comfortable, as warm or as perfect without you laying beside me.

I love you Monkey.
Your Momma and Rockstar.

My Rhody-girl passed away in my arms Wednesday, Nov. 28, 2012 after a short and painful battle with lung and abdominal cancer. Rhody celebrated her ten year adoptive birthday only one month and a day prior to her passing. She was almost eleven.

A letter to Ash

2013-02-01T16:35:37Z

Although it has been over six months since you passed, Felicity still answers the question "do you have any cats?" with a "yes we do, but Ash died." Your passing has brought on some of the most difficult questions a three year old can ask: "why did Ash die," "what happens when a kitty dies," "will our other kitties die," "will you die," "will I?" I answer honestly to the best of my ability, but, since she's still asking months later, it's difficult to feel like my answers are giving her what she needs. How selfish of me to wish that you hadn't had to leave us, so that I could be spending time twitching the fishing rod for you to catch and petting your handsome head rather than answering difficult questions inadequately.

We all miss your calm and secure presence; no one has stepped in to fill your place as "head cat," but none of the others really have that "good leader" type of personality. Rory has taken to following Tinkerbell around, as she's the only tabby in the house now. I worried quite a bit about Rory at first, since he depended on you so much, but he seems to have settled now and has even gotten a bit more accepting of us humans! I think that it was a true blessing that you were able to pass at home, as it gave all of us the chance to say a proper good-bye. Still, there isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss you and wish you were still with us (I also still tend to think it's you whenever I happen to see Tink out of the corner of my eye).

The other day, Felicity asked me "which star is Ash on?" and I told her that the next clear night, when the stars are out in force, we'll go out and see if we can find it. When we do find it, make sure you give us a nod or a purr or some small meow: remind us that the connection is still there - that as long as you live in our memories, you're still a part of the family - that no matter what, love never dies . . .

A letter to Clark

2013-01-31T19:15:25Z

People may think that it is odd that I am writing a letter to a grasshopper that I owned. I just thought that I should, since you were surprisingly a large part of my life. For example, I still remember the first time that you hopped onto my screen door. My friend almost squished you, but I thought that you were so bright. (Even though you were really stupid.) We had so many scary times, and then so many that seemed so silly I lost you in the garage once, and I thought that you went into the lawnmower. I also remember when you had to go get caught because you got loose, and the people next door thought that you were going to bite their children, and give them a disease...STDS. (Or that they would eat you.) Well, when you DID die, I'm really sorry that it was my fault. I had you for 12 years! Grasshoppers don't live that long! Maybe my mother switched you out...because I think that's unnatural. But yes, good-bye Clark, and sorry for making your guts stick to the bottom of my shoe.

A letter to Amanda and Bri

2013-01-31T18:54:29Z

I miss you guys so much because you were adorable together and were so loving. I don't want to say that much because I am already crying my eyes out, but I miss you guys everyday. You were so un-separable to the point where I wasn't able to keep Bri from going into the fire after Amanda. I hope it wasn't painful, and you guys are OK.

A letter to Toby

2013-01-27T15:13:31Z

Saying goodbye to you was very hard. I remember the day I adopted you...how I felt so relieved that we had gotten you out of that cage and how excited you were to just walk and walk and walk...even though you had a long road to good health and spirits. You were the first dog I ever picked out and I think we did a great job together. We lived a fine four peaceful loving years before we sent you off to that Kitty Dude Ranch in the Sky.

Okay. I think that is it for now. I miss and love you.

A letter to Taffy

2013-01-26T19:56:52Z

I still remember the day I met you. We walked into the breeders house and there you were at only 4 weeks old. I fell in love with you from that first moment. I knew I had to wait another 4 weeks but it was going to be a well waited four weeks. Throughout your whole life, you were always there when I needed you with a big smile on your face. You were the perfect and friendliest dog there has ever been. You were also my champion show dog in 4-H. I always looked forward to coming home from school to see your big smile on your face and your cold nose against my cheek. You were my first dog because I got you when I was about 4 yrs. old. Now I am 14 and had to celebrate my last 2 birthdays without you. Life is not the same without you and your little sister mittens, the cat, misses you a lot. Another member of the family that misses you like no tomorrow is Abby. You were 7 years old when we brought Abby home as an 8 week old puppy. You guys were best friends from the start. Unfortunately, you weren't there for Abby's first dog show, but she made you proud bringing home a champion in obedience and 2nd in showmanship. Everyone else in the family misses you like Nick, Mom, and Dad. I wish you were here right now because mom and dad are getting a divorce and I need both you and Abby. We do have another dog in the family but he lives with dad. His name is Goober and he is a year old Newfoundland. He gets along great with Abby and I love him but he would never take your spot in our hearts. Well Taffy, it's been nice catching up with you and I will defiantly write you another letter soon. I hope you are doing soon and are making new friends. When we do get reunited one day, you, Abby, and I will cross the rainbow bridge together. I love you so much, and miss you a lot everyday.

A letter to Skye

2013-01-18T07:49:34Z

Today marks two years since we said goodbye, since I last gave you a hug, since I last saw your happy face, saw u wag your tail, or ran my fingers through your fur. I miss you so much girl, so, so, much. It's a good thing I have keyko, I can't imagine what life would be like without a dog. I am finally going to get keyko spayed, and then in going to save up so we can enter agility classes. That's something I would have loved to do with you. I think back to all those years we spent together, I was growing up while you were growing old, but except for your greeting muzzle, no one would have been able to tell how old you were. You were always so enthusiastic and full of energy right up to the last month. I remember the morning we took you to the vets that very last time, you had woken up that day feeling better, you were able to stand up, and your tail was wagging as we walked into the vets. It's was sunny, so sunny that chilly January morning, and I knew it was right, I knew it was time for you to go. I also remember walking out of the vets, dogledd and looking back and seeing your tail through the door as we walked away. I wanted to take you home. I wanted to take you home so we could play in the backyard, you me and keyko, together like we used too. I wanted to take you home so I could give you milk bones, and brush you and talk to you and hug you, and so that you could sit obnoxiously close to me, making me give you attention. And I still want to take you home Skye, I want you to come home so bad, but your not going to. So you have too wait untill I get to heaven, I promise I'll do all those things, and me and mum and dad will give you belly ribs all the time. Some people think animals don't go to heaven, but I know you did, and besides, how could Jesus not let someone as perfect as you into heaven? Anyhow, here's some updates. Mum and dad are doing well, dads deffinentially getting older though, so that means grumpier! But you know that dads alway's been on the grumpy side anyways! Luke is doing much better. Anyways, I have to go now,
Untill next time,
Love ES

A letter to Nina

2013-01-12T15:44:16Z

It's been alittle over 12 hours since we said goodbye. I still can't believe we had to let you go. I feel like my heart left when u did. It was the hardest thing to do, but I know you knew we were there with you. I couldn't watch you suffer and I held you until you were truely gone. You never left my side and I wasn't about to leave yours. Me and Daniel are lost without you here. I'm not ready to move your bed or put up your medicine just yet. When we got home last night from the vet, me and Daniel sat on the couch and talked about the first night you came home from Aunt Jo's. I brought you home the night Aunt Jo passed because the lady you were going home with couldn't take you that night because she went into labor. You gave us 8 wonderful years and had a wonderful life with your sister and brother. You have been my little shadow for the past 8 years and I'm missing you not being beside me right now. Everyone tells us that time will heal our broken hearts but I don't think that I will ever get over this. You will always have a special place in my heart sweet Nina. I know that you and Aunt Jo are together now and that makes me smile. You loved her too. I will get your ashes back next week and plan on spreading some on Aunt Jo's grave and we will keep the rest with us. You had two families that loved you dearly. Phibie and Ty both know something is wrong and I believe Phibie knows you are gone. They will miss you too, Phibie more than Ty I'm sure :) Just know that there won't be a day that goes by that I don't think of you. Until we meet again my sweet Nina! We all love you!

A letter to Ellie Bear

2013-01-07T22:50:10Z

You were the best niece I could have asked for! Your mama was crazy for getting a kitten when she first moved to Pittsburgh, but I'm thankful she brought you into my life. You had the sweetest little face and I will miss you laying on my chest while we watched TV. I know you are in a better place with no more pain and you can finally eat again. I am so thankful we could spend the day together on Saturday before we had to say goodbye. Your mama made the best decision for you but that doesn't make it hurt any less. Please say hello to Grandpa Ganoe for me, he'll keep you company until Amber or myself get there. As I always told your mom I'd take you if anything happened to her, now you have to take me if I go before the twin.

Love you with all my heart sweet Bear.

A letter to Ellie

2013-01-07T22:30:19Z

It's only been two days since I had to make the hardest decision of my life..and that was to let you go. You were only 6 years old with your birthday being next month. So young, So Pretty and So full of life! But God was ready for you! You will always be my baby girl, my Baby Bear! I remember when I first laid eyes on you...This little ball of gray and white fur...with those big green/yellow eyes and your courious attitude! I knew right then you were mine! You were there for me when times were ruff and never judged me. When those guys in my life decided to leave you were always there! You knew how to make Mama feel better and I can still feel your small body laying on my chest when we would watch tv and cuddle in bed. I miss you so much! And think about you every minute of every day. I wish I was able to save you and get rid of that cancer that took you away...I wanted to keep you but I knew you were in pain. You were a fighter though. I hope I didn't make the wrong choice but I could tell you were no longer yourself. I wish I had more years with you but we will meet again soon. Please know Ellie Bear that mama loves you so much and misses you!!! I still look around for you and feel your spirit. I hope your having fun up there..No more pain and now you can eat!! I love you Bear!

A letter to Baby

2013-01-04T02:34:47Z

This picture was taken December 24th, 2011 and you passed January 3, 2012. Not a day goes by that my heart does not ache for you. We were together for 18 + years and you fought cancer like my little champ. But you told me one year ago today that you had enough and I had to let you go. I know you are in a better place but I have to admit that I am not in a better place with out you. You saved my life countless times and I will never be able to thank you enough for being there for me.

If I could have 5 more minutes with you I would thank you and tell you how much I love and miss you. My Angel Baby, I miss and love you more then I could even express. But I know you always knew.

A letter to Chico

2012-12-30T19:53:17Z

You came into my home a mere two years ago. You brought your sidekick Buddy, your owner and love with you. I will miss the little things you did to make me smile.
Head in my lap with soulful eyes peering up at me for a scratch behind the ears.
The " happy dance" when getting a back scratch.
Sitting "pretty" for a treat.
The obstacle course you created when I wanted in the bathroom.
Being the last out the door to announce possible marauding invaders.
The first in the chow line.
But most of all, just the devotion you had for the people in your life.
You are missed.
Goodbyes are always painful, but know this:
You will always have a special place in my heart.

A letter to Chico

2012-12-29T19:03:36Z

I will miss you so.
We had a great life together.
Camping trips, road trips, running on the beach, going to work.
Not many dogs can say they had two jobs in their lifetime.
You were the "dock dog" at the ferry dock and the "office dog"
at the dog bathing and grooming joint.
You touched so many lives, you are loved by many more people
than you know.
Your pals Buddy and Smokey will see you over
the rainbow bridge when it's their time.

I love you my boy.

A letter to Spencer

2012-12-08T10:30:39Z

For 17 1/2 years you were our son. You saw us through grief, loss, tragedy and also joy. You were always the light of my life. You were "my sunshine". My heart feels overwhelmingly empty without you. Your Dad is being very patient. The other morning I was in the bath, you know I love the bath and I looked over to find you and there you were sleeping under my pajamas like you always did. Of course, I realized it wasn't really you but it looked like you. We always found some peace there, together. The house is so empty without you. I miss you every day. I know you didn't want to leave and I know that it was time for you to leave. You were so brave and hung on so long I hope you have found peace as I am sure you have. If there is a heaven and I hope that there is; then I hope that you have found your Grandma's and are sitting by their side. I love you and I miss you. I promise to be better because, I know if you were here you would insist I not be sad.

A letter to Miss "Mouse"

2012-12-08T00:24:46Z

You died in my arms on Dec.4th,2010 with a Heart attack.you went quickly,but you took a piece of my heart with you.I miss the sound of your Meow calling "Moma" when I get up,and we sure worked hard and fought the battle together up and down the road to the vet,the last 6mos. of your life,that we found out you had hyper-thyroid desease.I know you hated to go to the vet and I'd just cry when you did.I put up your favorite rug,so no one else got it.Joleen sure missed you a lot and picked up a lot of your ways as you trained her.I see a lot of the things you taught her like where to go hide,and you thought the clothes basket was a pet taxi,so run. She does ,too.I still love & Miss you my "Mousie".I know you never mated or had kittens,even though you were never spayed,but you didn't seem to mind.We had a bond those last years,and I hope to see you again as you were when you were young.We had 14 wonderful years together,I just hope someday,It will be ForEver. You're in my Heart & Mind untill then>Play in the sun.I Love You.

A letter to Darwin

2012-12-04T19:18:28Z

It's been a whole week since you left. I miss you so much. Daddie does too. Humphrey is doing his best to keep his tail wagging and has been taking advantage of the extra cuddles available. I take him out now in the car everywhere I go. The first few trips were horrendous - you taught him well, my boy! He barks and whines and yips like the best of them - you should be proud of your work!

I don't know how you feel about this but we've signed up to be foster parents to give a temporary home to someone else in need. Remember when you were in the pound? If we hadn't come along, I'll bet you would have wanted a foster Mum instead, right? And remember when we first went to meet Humph with his foster family? Well, it'll be a bit like that. No-one will ever replace you, that's not what it's about. No-one could, my darling beagle boy. But we feel like we have a place to share and there are pups out there who need us. We chose a 'senior dog' rescue to volunteer with, so that means that Humphrey will probably end up having an older brother (or sister) again - albeit a foster-bro/sis. That should keep him in line, eh? We're going to let the foster pup use your bowl and bed and leash. And of course they can share the toys with Humphrey too. But your collar is in my purse and no-one's going to use that. I took your name tag - the copper one - off the collar and Daddie has it on his keyring now. When I chose it, I kind of had that in mind because I knew this time would come and how desperately hard it would be especially for Daddie. So, every time he picks up his keys, he's going to see the tag you wore so proudly - Darwin, the missing piece of our family puzzle.

So we're still waiting to collect your ashes. It was so hard to leave you there last Wednesday although it's a lovely place. If you were watching from wherever you are, you might have seen that Daddie, Humphrey and I spent some time walking in the grounds, looking at the other graves and memorials. If it hadn't been raining, it would have been beautiful. And did you see Humphrey's reaction when we came nose to beak with that emu? Oh. My. Goodness. He was so perplexed by it: a huge feathery dog with two legs! I actually smiled for the first time! We went into the town afterwards and got a cup of coffee as, for the first time in sooooo many years, there was no reason to rush home. The house is empty without you, my love. I don't know how you did it but honestly your little 30lb self filled this house and made it our home.

There are flowers all over the dining room table - folks who love you and miss you. I'm not sure you'd like them though - the smell might get up your beagley nose!

Today's hard. Tomorrow might be easier. Remember that I love you and I'll remember that you love me too. And Daddie and Humphrey. And that never dies, does it my darling boy?

A letter to (Queen) Bee

2012-12-03T06:14:45Z

Every day we miss you. Elijah didn't mean to attack in his quest for dog ranking when you were sick. Hapi is still wild--but trying to assume the role of Queen pack leader. She is a silly willy--you were more serious and regal. Your new fur siblings are Lady, Ronny, Darla and Sandy. Lady is more like you--even with her bad foot. She is calm, serious, sweet as pie. She was 122 lbs and has lost weight now that her thyroid is better. Darla looks like you except 14 lbs with fur. Same color markings. You would love her. Ronny is excitable. Remember when you farted and woke yourself up? Ronny would run like a fireball if you did that to him. Sandy is precious. Found her in the back of the house where I used to walk you. She is a love. She would love to have learned from you, followed you around the house. She also thinks Hapi is to goofy and should calm down. She "checks" her rambunctious behavior just like you used to to. We know you are here Bee. I feel you. I loved you so much. Your daddy James feels horribly guilty for leaving you with me. You were the best child he ever had--considering he took care of non of his human children. He took care of you the longest. He's a bit of a punk--you know that, but that's your Daddy and you took care of him many times. Elijah is getting up there and perhaps, feels bad for the things he did to you. But he loves you and appreciates everything about you. He's a senior now. Now he knows what its like to be a little tired, bones ache, and lots of tumor growths for no reason. You other family misses you. Do you hang with Miss Kitty? Grandma? Kiss Grandma for me!! I love you Bee. Everyone loved you. You are still legendary among the Rottis. The oldest to have ever graced the earth for as long as you did. My bones ache too Bee. I miss you and look forward to your kisses once more.

A letter to Sandy

2012-12-03T00:10:07Z

It has been two long years since I've seen you. And I miss you every single day. I remember I had just started volunteering at our local shelter when I saw you. You skinny thing, you were terrified of everything. Someone found you running along the highway and brought you in. I brought everyone who was looking for a pet to your cage, hoping they'd adopt you. Days went by and you began to cough. I knew what that meant. On the last day I decided to take you myself. I had no idea what I was in for. You were very sick, so we had to quarantine you from our other two pups for weeks. You wouldn't eat and you were so thin. But slowly you got better. However, you and our corgi mix Molly took one look at each other and it was WWIII. For three years we had to keep you separated. When I decided to move out and end my marriage, of course you went with me. I remember that first night in the apartment. You and I eyed each other like "okay, now what?" You were my best buddy for the next eleven years. Remember those great naps we took? No matter where you were or what you were doing, if I laid down on the couch, you were there with me. You were sick often; I think you must have had a terrible illness as a puppy, and it flared up every now and then. When I realized that you weren't going to get better, I had a very difficult decision to make. I always hoped you'd spare me and that I'd one day find you peacefully gone. But that's not how it worked out. You were the best beagle ever and I will never forget you. No dog will ever replace you in my heart. I'll see you some day, Sander McSander, Sandy Boo-Boo Kitty.

A letter to Alice

2012-12-02T06:45:18Z

I remember the first day I met you as if it were yesterday. Your owners called me and ask if I could take you and Jake your boyfriend. I had bought a couple of puppies from them and sent them to Westie Rescue several weeks before the call. Now they were needing a home for you and Jake. I told them that my funds were exhausted and they said if I would just come and get you for free.
I arrived at their home and they carried you and Jake out to my car. You were both loaded with fleas and horribly matted. The gave me your papers and I was ready to leave for home when the lady said the fatal words--- "Oh yeah, she might be pregnant". Well that changed everything. I had a transport set up for you and Jake to go to Westie Rescue. But now---- I couldn't send you. We arrived home and both of you went right to the tub. Gave you a flea treatment and a bath. My groomer was my next call. Jake left with in a week and you went to the vet for a check up. Yup, you were preggers. Clean bill of health tho. So we settled down and got you a nice big crate for when the pups came. And on November 10 I woke up to whimpers of newly born puppies ---4 of them two boys and two girls. George and Gracie, Hannah and Elvis. You were a great mom!!! But when the time came at 5 weeks you were done with them and we started feeding them for you. I laugh now--you were so forceful with them. You had been a mom before and you were surely ready to be just Alice. We had you spayed and you became a puppy yourself. The pups all found great homes with the help of Westie Rescue. You were up for adoption too and just before you went to your new home we had another vet check and got the bad news----heart worms. I was furious that the vet had missed this before but he said she could have just contracted it and it didn't show in the test. So you had to go through the horrible shots and pain they cause. I wanted to take you home after the shot and we got 3 miles from the vet when you were crying so much I had to take you back. I was sure you were dying. The vet said he would keep you and I could pick you up tomorrow.
I cried all the way home. The next day the vet called and ask if you had ever had seizures. "Never, I said, what's wrong??? " He said you were in the stainless steel cage and lunging at the back of it. I laughed so hard I could hardly talk. "Oh yes she chases lights, any lights, and if there is a reflection of light in the cage that is all that is going on." He was very relieved. You came home and we never tried to find you another home again. You lived with us for 4 more years and then one day you just couldn't get up. Back to the vet who said it was your heart and while we spoke you passed quietly away. The heart worms had done their damage--- you were only 7 years old. I miss you so. The fun we had with flashlights. You loved to chase the light. Well, my love, you finally caught it. Duncan and Hannah say Hi and they will be there with you someday as will I.

A letter to Bubba

2012-11-02T00:07:18Z

I think about you every day. It has been over 3 years since I let you go, but still I find it hard to talk about you without feeling overcome with emotion. You were my friend, my child, my parent, my teacher and my confidant. You were me.
As first I didn't feel you here with me, but now I feel you so strong in my heart and soul, I understand that I never lost you. I could never lose you.
But, I do miss the way we would spoon together on the sofa or the bed and the way you would lick my nose if I blew in your ear. I really miss that. My new friends are crazy funny, Roxy and Pigeon - I think you would like them, but I suspect you would find them annoying!! They are super high energy and quite scatty. You were always the Buddah. Buddah Bubba - my beautiful, gentle, stoic and wise Whippet. I do miss you Bubba. I don't think I believe in the Rainbow Bridge, but I hope I am wrong and I hope you are there with Moose and Mia and Bertie, playing and having fun. And if such a place exists I hope I will meet you there one day. That would be paradise. I still have a little of your ashes - I think I fantasize that maybe one day, if the singularity happens in my lifetime that I might be able to bring you back - all of you - your body, your mind, your memories, your essence, your love.
I miss you so much Bubba - I hope you are happy and running like the wind, chasing squirrels and skipping high in the air the way I remember you.
You taught me that I could be a mother, that I could love and be responsible, that I was loveable. You loved me. And I love you. Thank you, Bubba, thank you.
Please if you have time, visit me in my dreams - it means so much to me when you pop by and I get to see you briefly. Life was so hard for me for so long after you died and it is only now I can see the light again. So it will only bring me joy to see you in my dreams.
Wish I could hug you again and stroke your velvet coat. Love you. LOVE YOU!! Be safe, play and know you will live forever in my heart.

A letter to Bella

2012-10-23T16:01:38Z

YOU WERE THE FIRST

I'm sometimes sad,
I miss your endless grace
A delicate feline
with white and grey face
You were Turkish Angora
Yet found on the street
A dainty fey puzzle
with small furry feet
You had a long life,
Of love faith and wonder
What miracle, Bella, did we live under

And you were the first
You started it all
A Cat with green eyes
If I can recall
You're my inspiration
My familar it's true
You, my kitty fey spirit
You were just you

You walked in the door
You were meant to stay
You weaved our spirits together
They're together today
You were an Emmisary of love
Of hope and of faith
You're part of my Self
You were always great

And so the cats come,
Shy fosters and more
You pushed open the way
You led through the door
Ruffy and Smokie, Prinny, and Nat
CK and fosters
All the magick of Cat
A Turkish Angora
Who slept on Daddy at night
Purring through all
You made it all right.

I remember your play,
I remember the way
You would stretch out in sun puddles
Though most of the day
I remember you chasing
The string along mice
Through winter hallways
Of twilight and ice
Napping with Daddy,
Grooming my hand
Through the scariest of surgery
That was never planned.

You were the first, my fur child it's so
My reason for living and for letting you go
You were the first, of all lovely cats
My little Bella, you're a miracle at that
You were the first, you started it all
I miss you Bella in the wonder of Fall

I picked up your ashes, your pawprint in clay
Where are you Bella, are you ions away?
Do you run through green fields
With Gump, Tiger and friends?
Do you find ways back here cause it can't be 'the end'.

I watch our Ruffy, as he closes his eyes
A low rumbling purr, do the others realize?
That you were the first, my soul mate for sure
A million memories wrapped in meows and purrs
The places where you lay, the others now claim
Thats the way of cats, and they aren't to blame
Living in the moment, pacing through all time
Creatures of mystery, comedy sublime

You started it all, Miss Plume tail it's so
I wish that I didn't have to let go
But it had come time, you told us that
Such is the way of a fey gray and white cat
You could see the others through the portal whence you came
So many years ago a kitten without your name

So you leapt up and out, following Alex I know,
I sensed her in the room, and I watched you go
A last little glimpse of a furry plume tail
As you turned for a second and looked back through the veil
And I smiled through the grief and through many tears
I said I love you Bella, my best friend for years
I'll miss you my Bella, how to say thank you
for the miracle in fur-you started Rescue

And now as I sit here, with a list before me
Of cats needing homes, so many, you see
But I feel you at my shoulder, you brush the air
My Patron Saint of Fur, you make us care
For yes, in the words of Ruffy, he of orange fur
We can't give up, yes trust miracles occur

You were the first cat in from the cold
A small funny feline with eyes that were old
My daughter familar, wrapped in lovely fur
Now I can imagine that I hear your purr
As I watch cats in the window, on the bed with your dad
And somehow, blithe spirit....I know you'd be glad.

D.A.H.K October 10, 2012....the day we got Bella's ashes back...

I will love you my little Bellisimo forevrer.

For you...now and Always

A letter to Shyanne

2012-09-20T00:17:19Z

It has now been over 3 weeks since we last were together and I am finally at a place where I can speak about the impact that your absence in my life has had on me. From the very first day you came into my world, not a day thereafter went by that I did not learn from you. You taught me how to love again and kissed all of my tears as I went through a loss and a time in my life that I had always thought would be the hardest, but I now know that not be the case. Never did a day go by that we both did not give and received unconditional love from each other. You lifted my spirit every day and gave me strength where I could not find it for myself. The only certainty is that I woke up every single morning with more love in my heart for you than the day before. I miss your stinky breath and your chewy cheeks and holding your paws. I miss our endless snuggles, laughter, play time. I miss feeding you and bathing you and blow drying you. I even miss your 20 minute poops, they were such an amazing lesson in patience for me. You gave me my zen moment --every day. I never even thought about the possibility of not having you physically in my life and you were torn from our life together way to soon! Tragic does not even begin to articulate what happened to you but it is your spirit that guides me to find the light where I only want to see dark. There are bad people in this world and I must accept that. I chose my profession based upon the love and respect that I feel towards animals and always wanted to advocate for their humane care and treatment. I just honestly never thought I would have to do it because of personal reasons. I vow to you my baby girl, that I will make a change. The laws for cruelty (which in NJ date back to the 1800's), must change and in your honor, I will do everything in my power to work towards that change. In the short 31/2 years that I was blessed to have your presence in my life, I learned more about life than anything else has ever taught me, I am eternally grateful to you and oh so sorry. It has been said that grief and love are directly proportionate. I know this to be true because the hole that has been left in my heart feels boundless, just like the love that I had for you. I am confident that every day of your life, you knew you were loved, immensely. You are the sweetest sould that I have ever had the opportunity to be with and I am so very thankful for having you in my life. I will carry your spirit with me in my heart and in my soul. I will continue to love, because that is what you taught me. I will stay in the moment and not dwell in the past, because that is what you taught me. I will have compassion, sympathy and empathy for those that are not good, because that is what you taught me. And if I had a tail, I'd wag it every day in yout honor, because that is what you taught me. I remember when I adopted you and I asked the woman what you were like and she said, she's just so grateful. I will go on every day of my life being grateful, because that is what you taught me. Because of you, I am grateful for what I have had, what I currently have and what is yet to come. Shyanne- I will miss you every day of my life and I am just so grateful to have had the time we did. I love you so very much angel.

A letter to Satin Doll

2012-09-17T18:08:55Z

You lost your human Mom 6 years ago and today we are losing you. While you were spoiled and sometimes bossy you were a friend to Mom and that's all that matters. When you get to heaven you will not be alone you will be reunited with your Mom and Tiggy and they will be so happy to have you with there. Your pain will be gone and eating will not be a chore. Your days will be filled with happiness again and that is all we can ask for.

We love you Satin.

A letter to Charlie

2012-09-07T02:38:24Z

There are so many things I want to say to you but I should start with I am so sorry I wasn't there when you got out of the yard and disappeared. I'm sorry I couldn't find you. Where did you go? What did you do? You must have been so scared. I'm sorry you aren't home where you belong. I promised to love and protect you for the rest of your life and I failed. Not at loving you, for I will do that for the rest of my life. You are always in my thoughts. I miss you nudging me with your nose to pet you...I miss your barking from another room to get attention...I miss sharing ice cream and treats with you. I miss our cuddles and hugs...I miss your gentleness...I even miss you waking me up too early on my day off. You have a part of my heart no one else can have. And even though your brothers and sisters are still at home and I love them too, I am having difficulty going home each day and not seeing you. Not being able to pet you or rub your belly. I pray each and every day that you will find your way back to me, but if for some reason you don't, I want you to be safe and happy. You are so dear to me and I am so very grateful for having been a part of your life. If you take nothing else with you from this world, please take the knowledge that you are loved and cherished. I love you Charlie Bean and miss you more than words can say... please, please come home.

A letter to El

2012-08-29T00:32:50Z

It has only been a day since the vet came and took you away from me. It was, perhaps, the right decision despite being one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. I didn’t want you to suffer. I didn’t want you to waste away. I hope you understand but somehow doubt you do. I doubt everything right now.

The selfish part of me wants you to still be here, to help sooth my own suffering. Within an hour of your death I couldn’t think about anything except my desire to hold you, hug you, kiss the top of your head and hear you purr. But I couldn’t. I still can’t. I never will again. Sadly, (this is something I shouldn’t admit, even to you, Chubby girl), because I couldn’t hold you I collected a ball of the fur you left behind and I held that. It didn’t help, of course. It was kind of gross, and frankly, it wasn’t you, it was simply another thing you’d left behind.

For such a little kitty, the empty space you’ve left behind is enormous.

My beautiful girl, I miss you.

A letter to Lizzy

2012-08-24T00:25:12Z

I miss you so much. It has been 356 days since I last held you.I hope you know how much I loved you. I can't believe that you are not here with us anymore. You were so much more than a "pet." People don't understand what you meant to me and our family. You were a part of that family. I feel as if I let you down. I hope you understand that we felt you were suffering. You seemed so stressed and just wandered the house, not knowing where you were at. I was so afraid that you would hate me for having to take you to the vet and put an end to your suffering. I hated every second of making the decision. I still regret having to do it. I will never forget leaving the vet's office without you; I know how much you hated to go to "doggie jail." The other day I came home and thought you were here for a second, instead it was Nick's dog, Ozzie, who came to visit. It was just another reminder how much I miss you. I know Katy misses you so much too. We can barely talk about you, without crying. I don't think I will ever get over missing you. I was thinking about you last night, and the way you used to burrow under the blankets. You loved your blankie! And then there were your sockies! Boy, did you use to have fun with those sockies. And the "claw" that made you growl, it was so fun. I will never forget you ever Lizzy... I miss you so much my baby girl. You taught me so much. I love you always and forever.

A letter to Chancer

2012-08-23T00:56:43Z

"The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face"

I remember seeing you for the very first time, sitting on the front step with Billy. I fell in love with you and never stopped loving you.

Where are you, baby? Come home.....

I have to learn to be grateful for the ten years I had with you...thank you, my little angel.

A letter to Chancer

2012-08-04T23:04:07Z

Hi baby. Iv'e been writing to you almost everyday since you've been gone. Miss you every single minute. Your being gone is a fact that runs around in my head, something I try to ignore, but sometimes it grabs a hold of me and I have to think about the empty space in my heart and life. I hope you are happy, my little angel.

A letter to China Blue

2012-08-02T20:32:55Z

My Chi~girl ! Wow, baby, I really miss your loving force in the world. I miss our long walks with your mama, Aja, I miss your doggy-dreams, & fur all over the house... I miss even your growls when I tried to find a place in the bed for me beside you two ! My speckled girl, we had great times with Aja at the lake in Chicago, & playtime with you was serious - balls, frisbees, rope-bones. I remember one of your favorite things to do was herd all the other dogs, the Aussie Shepherd in you ! I remember so well, realizing when Aja was pregnant - she was the quintessiential mother, loving all of you pups dearly. We were blessed with your presence as well, my love. I had made the decision to keep the last pup with your mom & me, & you were amazing ! So different with your beautiful black & white markings, & beautiful spots, softest fur like your mama; inside you two were peas in a pod, so alike in so many ways. You girls always let me know you were on my side, you totally had my back from the very beginning. What I would have done without you both, Goddess knows. I miss you girls' sweet kisses, & the scent of your fur. Well, dear, I thought you were pregnant at 9 yrs, for the first time. I was quite surprised... You started slowing down on walks, plus it was really warming up for May in AZ. We had a vet appt, & our vet said if we waited another week for your ultrasound, we might see puppies, & how many there were. A few days later, a Sat. morning, I came out with my coffee first thing, & checked on you. You sat by the back door, panting, & I thought, oh , maybe it's today, time for your puppies to be born. I had to work a few hours, so left you in the care of a friend. When I returned, still no puppies, yet, & you wanted only bits of ice/water, which were coming back up. Almost an hour later, I decided to take you to the emer-vet, & make sure there wasn't something wrong. You did NOT want to go... I don't blame you, so much pain you must have been in. Once there, they did their tests, & told me you were not pregnant, but you had some fluid filled sacs in your belly, were dehydrated, in a lot of pain. Some major kind of infection inside you, & offered to euthanize you. No ! I couldn't allow that, we had our reg. vet appt for Tues, just a few days. I wanted to bring you home, whatever meds/painkillers you needed, & thought you would be 'ok'. So, that's what we did. Barely got the first set of meds down you... you lay on the floor, panting, uncomfortable, unable to sleep (since 6am), moving to a new floor spot here & there. I was exhausted, lay down for a short nap. Woke around 2a, sat with you, rubbed you gently, gave you kisses, spoke with you; read you from a book for a bit. Lay down for a while next to you, to comfort you, prayed to Great Spirit to not let you suffer, keep hurting like this. I didn't know how we'd make it til Tues. Fell asleep again around 6:30 am, was awakened by a friend, "China's gone..." she said. It didn't compute. I stammered, but I was just awake with her, how did this happen so fast... ? Apr 28, 2011, you arrived at the Rainbow Bridge, my dear. Your infection had gone septic, & in hindsight, I'm glad you didn't suffer longer than that ~24 hrs. I couldn't bear it. Bless your heart~ I always thought Aja would be first to pass, & we'd have plenty of time to enjoy on our own. Did you ever really have me all to yourself ? As a wee little lassie pup, you won my heart, & this woman loves & honors you for all you are & were. Until we meet again... Namaste'

A letter to Aja D'Elle

2012-07-31T17:44:24Z

Mama~Girl, I miss you so, terribly. It has been 3 mos since you crossed over, & I'm lost. I'm so very thankful we had 14 1/2 yrs together, love, you were & are amazing in my mind. Such a sweet, gentle soul.. the genteel lady, graceful, & loving almost everyone you met. The eternal greeter ! I remember that day I met you in Lawrence, KS, the college kids were trying to find you a home, & had locked their keys in their car, so I got to hold you... you fell asleep in my arms. Tiny lil black velvet girl, dark shiny eyes, little warm-wet nose... you slept with me later that night snuggled under my chin in bed. I was wrapped right around your wee paw, darlin. Then from the farm in KS, to KC, & North Carolina, where at 4, you got pregnant with the neighbor dog, & brought me your sweet daughter, China Blue, to love, too. You taught me so much about opening my heart, full throttle. And forgiveness, & unconditional love. My life has been so sweetly & beautifully, & irrevocably altered because of you two, my precious Girls ! We have been through SO many adventures together, on our journey, & you made it possible for me to make it through whatever it was that wasn't right at the time. I miss your bright, intelligent eyes, your telling barks, our snuggles in bed, holding & kissing you, your nails clicking on the floors, the scent of you - I liked to sniff your ears, b/c they smelled like 'home' to me... I had pretty much assumed you would 'go' first, but China paved your way a year ago. Then in Jan., I knew something was off with you; less energy, not eating as usual. In Feb. the vet did a CBC, & we had you on thyroid meds. In March, I had noticed the growth on your nose & forehead, & the vet did an xray to rule out cancer, but that determined what was indeed happening in your aging body. I just didn't want you to suffer needlessly, & we talked & cried a lot together, processing what was coming. Then my sister/your Auntie's visit from Chicago for 2 wks, when I left you in the care of vet-boarding for my first trip to the Grand Canyon. I had never boarded either of you girls, & it took me a few days to acclimate to the guilt of having done this to you at this critical time in your life. Please forgive my error in this decision - I would never want you to feel I had abandoned you... I asked Great Spirit/the Goddess to be with you, until I was back (barely 3 days), & for you not to pass alone, somewhere unfamiliar. You waited for me/us... We picked you up at boarding, & they carried you to the car on a stretcher. All the way home, I spoke softly with you, holding your paw, & reaching over to give you kisses, & smell your warm fur. Sweet Angel of mine, you passed less than 2 hrs after we got home. Several times I snuggled you, & spoke gently with you, but I didn't know your time was so imminent. I really wanted to just lay on your bed with you, & encircle you with my~self, loving you. The last time I came to check on you again, I saw that you were gone already. You were flying to the Rainbow Bridge & beyond, & China Blue was the first to greet you there, I'm certain ! It is a blessing to know you're not suffering anymore. Emotionally, I'm still in shock, especially with China's sudden passing last year. It's so lonely now, just me. I know I will bring other dog(s) into my life when I feel I'm ready; couldn't NOT. We shared a deep, soul connection , my love. When it is my turn one day, I know I will hear the thumping of a tail on the floor, & we can go dancing off through the meadows altogether at long last ! Goodbye my sweet baby~girl, I love you forever & beyond ~ <3 XOXOXO

A letter to Kalo

2012-07-22T16:09:27Z

Kalo, you have been gone for almost 3 months and it still puts a physical hurt in my chest. I don't think I can ever get over you and the way you passed. It will always haunt me.

Your mama and daddy had another litter of pups the day before you passed and God sent me a sweet little angel to help with the pain. Her name is Shayla and she is such a sweetie, just like you. But I hold her and cry for you. I love her very much, but am having a really hard time with your death.

I miss our cuddle time and your funny antics. I hope you have found the peace you were looking for. Love and miss you buddy.

A letter to Boo Boo Kitty

2012-07-22T05:54:41Z

Where do I begin? I know that you are in a better place and no longer suffering. But it is still so difficult for us when we put down the breakfast/dinner plates for everyone, to realize there is one less eater. You have been gone for 5 months and although time has passed, the loss has not. You see, everyone thought we (Daddy and I) were crazy for having two large dogs and 6 cats (including you). There was no possible way we could love and give enough attention to you all. But we know each and everyone of you and your personalities, and it hurts not to have your sweetness around. You helped Daddy through his darkest hours when he was battling his demons and you inspired him to continue moving forward, even though it was a most difficult road for him. Something my love and understanding was not able to do for him. But a little loving creature, as you were, was able to help him move mountains, even when he didn't want to. We literally picked you up off the street when you were well into your years, and although everyone likes to remind us we made your last few years happy, all we can say is that you made our lives complete. So, as we put down only five plates for the rest of your kitty siblings to eat, and 2 for your doggie siblings, I want you to know not a day goes by we don't think of you. And the only thing we hope is that we made your life as full as full can be, since you did the same for us. See you at the Rainbow Bridge my girl!

A letter to Chief

2012-07-13T04:45:11Z

I never planned on getting a dog that day I went to the SPCA with my sister....but the moment I saw you there I KNEW you were meant to be with me. I left you there that day but could not stop thinking about you, and ultimately my heart guided me back to you. 1 day before you were to be euthanized due to the crazy fact that no one else wanted to adopt you, you came home with me. And from then on, we lived 12 wonderful years together!!!!!

From the start, it was just me and you Chiefy. Then came the rest of our family......Jamie, Mateo and Kingston.
You and I had some crazy adventures together, there were so many times that you should not have made it home, chasing coyotes, bears, motorbikes, running off into the mountains doing what you LOVED to do....run free. But Chief you always came back to me, always. I'm so happy that we had such adventure. I hope you enjoyed it all. And please know I did everything I could to give you the best life possible. You came first bud.

Despite all the odds of your wild ways, you lived to be 13. It was so hard when we first noticed you getting stiff and sore after a long walk, and for the next 3 years we watched you slowly be able to do less and less untill the day came where you could hardly go out for a walk at all. Knowing how much you loved to be outdoors, it killed me to go out with Kingston and leave you at home. I felt so much guilt, and I still do. Even when you did go out and it was so hard for you to walk, you still had the drive and tried so hard to chase the kong, or play with Kingston. We knew that with your will and determination you would never totally give up. You were such a proud dog.

Chief you and I had a very special bond right from the moment we met eachother, and that bond can never be broken. You were my first real, true love. I miss you so much. It was so hard to make the final decision, i struggled with it so much, it killed me and it still does...but deep down I know that you couldn't go on anymore, it was just getting worse and it wasnt fair to keep you around for my own selfish reasons. I am so happy that you passed peacefully at home, in your bed, with me holding you. I hope you know that I did this, the hardest thing I have ever had to do, out of love and only love.
I asked you to give me a sign when you got "there", told you to knock something down...and you did knock that picture of you and Benson down, didn't you? I'm so happy to know that you two best buds are together again.

I love you so much Chief, and I am so heartbroken to be here at home without you physically here with me. Your presence is so greatly missed. There will never be one day where I don't think about you or miss you. I know you are running around somewhere, with Benson, pain free, and happy. And one day, we will meet again and I can't wait to wrap my arms around you. I love you so much, you have brought so much happiness into my life.
Hugs and kisses my Chiefy chooka.

A letter to Roxy

2012-07-12T00:56:14Z

The day I met you at the shelter I knew you won my heart! You had already been adopted and returned so it was fate that you chose me! Your passing was difficult to accept. The cancer finally won out, and we could do no more. It would have been selfish to keep you alive for our benefit. I did not want you to suffer any longer. You were still walking with your head held high when you went into the vets office. Your tail never stopped wagging. When you came out, your paw was shaved, there was an IV inserted and you were very drugged. I had one split second to tell her not to put you down. I remained silent. I knew it was for the best. Your head became heavy in my hands, your breathing ceased, and your body limp. I knew you were gone, but didn't want to accept it. Please forgive me for putting you down. I apologize for doing this to you, and when we meet again, I hope you will run up to me and wag your tail once more. No more pain, no more cancer, just fun, biscuits, and lots of other friends to play with. I miss you with all my heart Roxy!

A letter to Hampton

2012-07-09T21:14:51Z

We miss you dearly and wish you are safe in heaven with Pushkin and we love you
Love
beth Ann weaver and mckenna Evangeline weaver and maybe Denise too
:)

A letter to Buck

2012-07-05T02:47:34Z

I don't really know what to say. I have been pretty much numb since you left. You were such a huge part of my life, that now I don't even know what to do with myself. I still keep thinking you are here, and that I need to be home in time for your medicine, and not make noise after dark so I won't wake you while you are getting much needed sleep. I can't believe you are gone.

I know that you are with Tilly now, and that gives me some comfort. We both loved her so much. I just wish her loss hadn't had such a life changing effect on you. I miss her too, but hoped you and I could make it through to happier times. You, apparently, just wanted to be with her. I get that.

I knew we were in trouble when you quit crowing when she died. Then, the tumor started to grow. I hoped we could beat it, but then the others showed up. The vet said people just don't even try to fight cancer in chickens, so he didn't know if it would work or not. I held out hope. I would do it again.

I love that you still gave me love and affection even when you must have felt crappy. I love that you were so patient with me when I had to give you medicine. I love that you were still your loving snuggly self with me, even though I know you were mourning her loss. I miss these things. I don't know how to go through a day without them anymore.

People didn't get it when Tilly died, and they are actually sort of avoiding me now that you are gone too. I know I am not my usual cheerful self, but I have suffered the loss of both you, and your beautiful friend. If you had been dogs or cats, they would get it. But, since you weren't, I am just some weird person who loved "irrelevant and stupid animals that deserve whatever treatment they get" (yes, someone actually said that). You and Tilly were hugely relevant in my life, and will always be.

I hope that you and Tilly are together, and loving each other like you did here. I hope that you both remember your time here with me fondly, and that I get to see you again some day. I know that I will never forget you, and that I look forward to that day. Until then, I hope that it just gets to the point where I don't feel like crying all the time, and just rest in the comfort that you both are happy now, together.

People keep asking me if I will get more chickens. I just don't know. I know that I am one of the few people that understand what wonderful sentient beings you are, but I can't even believe how painful this whole thing has been. I would not trade one minute of the time I spent with you for anything, but I have this huge hole in my heart now. I guess time will tell. For now, I try to honor your memory, and make it through one day at a time. I miss you something fierce, and will remember you forever as my little fuzzy chicken buddy. Please know that there was nothing I wouldn't have done to save you. Sadly, it was not to be.

Give Tilly a kiss for me buddy. I miss you both, and always will.

A letter to Taxi

2012-06-23T00:33:40Z

You were not my horse, and I didn't know you all that well, but you were a very sweet horse and I hope you know that you were loved by many. That morning that Gene took you away, I don't know where he took you, nobody told me and Bonnie was too upset for me to ask her, so I can only hope and trust that it was a nice end for you. You lived a good 30 years, and you were always so gentle with those little kids on your back. I'm sure Carol was there waiting for you at the gates of heaven though, and I wouldn't be surprised if now she's teaching kids up there to ride. I can see them sitting there on yours and Jessie's backs as Carol instructs them on how to hold the reins from the back of her beloved horse who passed years ago. So have fun up there buddy, I'm sure god gives you all the carrots you could ever ask for.

A letter to Skye

2012-06-23T00:19:23Z

It has been so long since you left me, and I miss you so much. I can't believe that I haven't run my fingers through your beautiful fur in over a year now and it hurts me to know that I won't be able to do that in a long time. I will see you again someday in heaven, but that is a long time from now. I am starting to train keyko on agility and she is getting quite good. I only wish I could have tried it out with you. You would have loved agility...... Well maybe not the weave poles but you would have aced everything else. We are moving from our house to a smaller place and that too is very sad, since we have lived here for 13 years now. I had to take my painting of you down from my room as well as all of my horse posters. I love you sooooooo much Skye, I miss your floppy ears and your golden fur, your boundless energy and your perfect paws. Don't forget about me Skye, I will never forget about you.

A letter to Test

2012-06-21T04:23:59Z

This is my favorite

A letter to Neumann

2012-06-19T03:46:41Z

I hated letting you go today. I can't stop crying. But I feel lucky too. Lucky to have had you for so long. You meant so much to us. And brought so much joy. How you watched over our baby girl and gave her your tail when she learned to swim. How you nudged Papa when her blanket slipped off. You loved us unconditionally as we did you. Thank you for embodying gentility and tenderness in our lives. We love you always. I hope you have met your Mommie again. I see you jumping around like a young dog, no pains, no hardship and my heart smiles. You are love.

A letter to Danielle

2012-06-18T19:42:37Z

How I miss you my sweet one. We had such a deep bond, You were always my special needs girl. You had 2 surgeries on each knee due to luxating patella's, epilepsy since you were 3, heart murmer since you were 8, Cushings disease since the age of 11 and the beginning of the end, congestive heart failure when you were 11. The vet gave you 3 to 6 months in Oct of 2011. We lived and loved each day as if it was your last. You loved to eat, loved to play and loved me and your baby sis Abigail who misses you so much also. What a joyous reunion it will be when we all meet again. I'm waiting for you to send me a feather to let me know your ok up there. Life just hasnt been and never will be the same since you left on March 20th, 2012. Your Grandma misses you so much also. You died in my arms here at home that day. I wish I had known what was happening. I so hope I did all I could for you my love. I can't help but feel that I didnt. Know that your momma will miss and love you forever and a day Lovebug. Danielle...Till we meet again.

A letter to Baby

2012-06-14T05:45:12Z

Today has been a bad day. I am missing you terribly and sitting here crying and wondering where the past 6 months has gone. It feels like it was just days ago I gave you my last kiss. I know you know that you saved my life, I know that I would never have made it with out you. You were my soul mate. I know why they say people with animals live longer. Because they get love so unconditionally. Such an honest and pure love that I can't imagine what its like for people who never know the love of an animal. I see you in my dreams and wake up missing you more. You gave me 18 years and I wish I have one more day with you. I know that is selfish but if I could just hug you once more, feel you little paws on my face, wake with you sleeping on my back just one more time I would give anything.

I know days will be better, I know today is just a bad day. You would hate for me to be like this. Today just feels like I lost you all over again. I can't wait for the day when I get to see your sweet face again. I love you.

A letter to Pete

2012-06-13T01:42:50Z

I don't know why you died... you never showed any signs of being sick or maybe I never educated my self enough to see them. I regret not taking care of you as I should have. Not paying enough attention or not talking enough to you. But I loved you! So much! You left and I feel empty and sad. Pita asks for you and I just don't know what to say... I told her you left to bird heaven where you are now flying free and where you are now happy. I remember how much you would chirp in the mornings and whenever I came to the room. How jealous Pita would get if anyone got close to you and would try to fight us; she would bite you as well like if it was your fault. You would get to a corner and just look at me. I can't forget all those wonderful years... now I can't stop crying... I just wish you were still here Pete.
Did I scare you? I was cleaning your cage and needed the broom to sweep the fallen seeds and I stood up to grab the broom again you fell backwards to the bottom of the cage and scream oddly, for a second I thought you were stock or something so I ran and got help but when I came right back you were quiet and still... oh my poor Pete, why??? I miss you so much!!! I would do anything just to see you one more time. My sweet and kind Pete. I will take care of Pita, we are starting to bond, she calls for you it's all so resent... I will never forget you Pete! You lay in the backyard where I plan to plant a rose bush in your memory. If there is a bird heaven I hope that you are there and I hope that I will meet you once again. Love you always my precious friend.

A letter to Kalo

2012-05-31T16:07:41Z

I don't know where to begin. I only got to hold you for a year, but it was a wonderful year. You've been gone for a month and I still cry everyday. I keep thinking that I let you down in some way. Maybe I loved you too much because I was trying to get over losing Kodiak and Dusty. I keep thinking that there should have been something else I could do. Maybe I should have taking you to a different vet. Maybe a different medication would have helped you calm down. Maybe it wouldn't have, but I never tried. Your vet would not listen to me when I told them your med wasn't working. "Give it time", and now we have no more time together. I love you my fuzzy buddy and some day we'll be together again. You listen to Kodiak and he will take care of you until I get there. Love and miss you Kalo.

A letter to Tilly

2012-05-29T05:27:46Z

Nobody understands my grief at your loss, so I need to talk to you instead. They say you were just a chicken. They say chickens don't know or show love. They clearly never met you.

You came to me as Buck's companion, and I didn't even really expect to get attached to you. You didn't seem to want affection like he did, but I remember the moment you figured out that love was a good thing. The look on your face. The total abandonment to the affection. You never looked back. I still love Buck so much, but in all honesty, you were more loving and sweet than even he is. I can't believe how much you stole my heart. It's horrible here without you.

Buck misses you so much that he is not doing well now either. I talk to him about you, and I hold him and tell him it's o.k., but it really isn't without you. We both miss you so much.

I miss how you would melt in my arms when I pet you. I miss how you would rub your face on my face when I would give you kisses. I miss your beautiful face running to be with me when I came in to see you. I miss how good you were with Buck even though he was young and a little silly. I miss everything about you.

I tried so hard to save you. The vet tried hard to save you. We wanted you to stay, but it wasn't to be.

Buck is so sad at your loss, and he is sick now with a tumor that started to grow when you left him. I am hoping beyond hope that he survives. If he makes it through the surgery and recovers, I may need to get him a new companion, but it hurts to even think about it. No other bird could replace you in my heart. I don't believe he will see them the same way he saw you either. You were his perfect match. He is clearly grieving though, and a friend might help a little. I hope you don't see it as replacing you, because that could never happen. It's just in the hope that he will be a little less depressed.

I miss you honey, and I always will. You will forever be my girl. I hope you know how much you were loved. I hope you know how much you are missed. I hope you know that you will never be forgotten. I hope you are now in a better place where everyone sees how wonderful you are, and that you deserve just as much love and respect as any other living being.

Hopefully some day people will understand how wonderful you and your kind are, and people will not be ridiculed for loving one such as you. Hopefully some day people who love beautiful birds like you will be able to talk about it without having people make distasteful comments about eating you. Hopefully your very own legacy will be to further that cause. I still talk about how awesome you were, even though it gets mixed reactions. There are some that appear to be starting to understand. Perhaps that wouldn't have happened without you, and the sad loss of you. You have made a difference with your life. Even if, so far, it is just a few people. Hopefully it will continue to grow.

If nothing else, you were one very well loved little girl who left a great big hole in one human's life. If that was your only legacy, it would be enough for me.

Please wait for me in Heaven. I look forward to seeing you there.

A letter to Tevyn

2012-05-05T23:19:10Z

It's been six months since you left me, suddenly. I know you had an incurable neurological condition, but it is so unfair that you were here for only 18 months. I've never met a bunny quite like you - you loved everyone and everything. The photos I took of you with your canine brothers (and canine foster siblings too) warmed the hearts of many people - they told me so after you passed away. You were an educator; you taught people how intelligent and dynamic and loving bunnies could be. You showed people that life is to be respected, and shared with the ones we love. You made a difference.

I know I will never get over your passing. You were such a blessing to me. We had our routine, day after day, and we both knew it by heart. When I woke up in the morning, you'd be waiting outside my bedroom door with Ted. I'd pet you, then go downstairs for breakfast while you snoozed on the second stair from the top, waking occasionally an venturing downstairs to use your litter box in the pantry. You always waited in the kitchen for dinner, and at just the right time. I'd serve you your pellets and veggies, and you'd eat those right there next to the dogs while they ate their dinners too. After dinner, you'd stretch out on the cool tile, usually snuggled up next to Dylan. As the evening wore on, you'd hop up onto the couch and we'd watch TV together. Sometimes, I'd fall asleep on the couch, and wake up to the sound of you zooming around the room full speed, hopping a foot into the air in pure joy.

You were my baby boy, and I suppose you still are. You were my smallest love, at a mere 3 pounds. But you knew how to hang with the big boys. You were fearless. You were trusting. You loved unconditionally. You lived life the way I wish I could live life. I've been tainted by my experiences in this world; you never were. You always remained pure.

Your very last night, I knew I was losing you. I sat with you in my lap for most of the night. We fell asleep together. By the morning you were gone. I will always feel guilty for your life. I will always wonder why you didn't live a full, long life. It isn't fair that bunnies like you live lives of neglect, shut away in cages, lonely, sick, and suffering - and those bunnies make it longer than you did. It just isn't fair. For either of us. I loved you. I cared. I don't know why you left me. It breaks my heart every single day. Things aren't the same around here without you. Big Bunny misses you. You were her soul mate and she's made it very clear that she is not moving on from you either. She's doing ok, but you were it for her. People miss you. They miss your photos - the stories we told through them, the lessons we taught. You were such a wonderful advocate. You left such a legacy. But that's over now.

I know I have to move on. But I can't. I can't move on. I miss you. I love you.

A letter to Clutch

2012-04-30T05:50:43Z

It will be two weeks on Tuesday since you went to rainbow bridge. Four weeks from the time we found out you were sick. We did not find out until you were gone that you had Cancer and nothing more could have been done. You never let us know that you were feeling bad and you were always there for me at night, right at my feet where you liked to sleep. I still remember picking you out of the litter. We bred your daddy just to get you- you were his gift to us. The two of you were my pride and joy. Always comforting me when I needed you, always patient with your little boy who loved to play between you. Your Aunt Nestles and your sister Domino spent days mourning your loss. The blank space in our home is evident. We remember you daily, the way you would sit on the couch like the rest of us, like a person. The way you protected our home and your boy from any harm that may come. You were always a true and loving soul, and we will always remember you and love you. I remember the little butterball you were when I picked you up from your canine Mommy's home. The way you trained your human Daddy on the rules of living with a doberman and how you bonded with every member of the family in your own way. Domino has taken over your place on the couch and tries her best to be brave when the mailman comes- she knows you taught her what you could, but she wants you to know that she is only a boxer with small teeth after all- but she is trying her best to do your teaching proud and barks at the mailman daily! Aunt Nestles has been diagnosed with spinal stenosis. The vet says she has about 6 months to a year before she won't be able to use her hind legs anymore. She is a strong girl as you know, but I want you to keep a place for her with you and the rest of the family at the bridge- be there to welcome her in. Finally, I want you to know how very much we all loved you- I think that you knew that all the time anyway. We know that we will meet you again one day, and we will all be a family close again. Until then, run, play, smell the flowers, be pain free, smile your funny little smile and give your daddy a big wet kiss for us. We miss you, you are very much loved.

A letter to Kona

2012-04-29T07:12:27Z

Has it really been 10 days since I held you in my arms and heard you breathe your last breath?

In one way, it seems like it was yesterday. My emotions are still every bit as ragged and raw, and I still wake up nightly with my heart pounding and my adrenaline surging as if something terrible is wrong.

What’s wrong?!

And then I remember.

In another way, it seems like you’ve been gone much longer. When I think of you, I tend to remember the times before your back legs stopped working, before you couldn’t control your bladder or your bowels, before you became so vulnerable. Before we made that awful, but necessary, decision to free you from a physical body that was no longer able to keep up with your spirit.

For most of your life, you were strong and confidant and majestic. You could chase a coyote a half-mile to the top of a ridge at full speed and run back down again when you heard me calling you. You could hike up mountains, and run alongside my bike, and play at the dog park without ever getting tired. You were so proudly independent -- like a cat, we sometimes said about you. And although you were too proud to ask for attention, you sure loved getting it!

I never told you this before, but we brought you into our lives to help us deal with the death of our baby boy. I was pregnant for 22 weeks when I went into labor on our honeymoon in Hawaii. When we came home, we were very, very sad that we couldn’t bring our boy with us. Your dad said that maybe getting a puppy would make us happier, because then we’d have somewhere to put all the love that we had been saving up for a baby. I wasn’t so sure, but he convinced me to at least consider it.

Once we took one look at you, we knew it was the right decision. You were gorgeous, with expressive brown eyes and little tufts of fur framing your ears. But it was your gentle spirit, sweetness and intelligence that really made us fall for you. We named you Kona, a Hawaiian word, which means “wind from the west.”

I'm so grateful to your dad for bringing us together, because you made it possible for me to care again. I soon came to realize that inside that fluffy, white body was an old, wise, nurturing soul who loved me unconditionally. Sometimes it actually felt like you carried the spirit of my little boy inside you.

And now that you’re gone, I’ve lost you both.

For more than 15 years, our identities were linked. You were woven into my DNA like my hair color and eye color. Without you, I don't know who I am anymore. I've heard it said that losing someone you love is like losing a limb. Without you, Kona, it's worse; I’ve lost my heart.

I’m grateful we had time together that last day. Those minutes when I was spooning you by the fire were so precious. And that look you gave me when the girls brought you up the driveway in the wagon: ears up and pulled slightly together; eyes bright, alert and focused directly on me. It was the same look that melted my heart countless times before. Pure adoration. Pure joy. Pure love.

I dreamed about you the other night. Your dad and I were visiting a dog pound, standing in front of a large, elevated platform enclosed by a chain-link fence. Inside were about 20 dogs, sitting along the back wall as if they were in a police lineup. There was one white dog that caught my eye. Then I realized... it was you. We made eye contact and you ran over to me. We touched through the fence. You licked my hand. And then you gave me that look.

I told the man in charge that you were mine and I wanted to take you home. He said, “Fine, but you’ll have to wait until 6:00.”

What? Why do I have to wait until 6:00?

“That’s the time when we can check them out.”

Oh, please! Let me take him now!

“No, you’ll have to come back at 6:00.”

We had to leave, so we did. To pass the time, we went for a drive. We kept checking our watches, but the hands never seemed to move.

When will it be 6:00?

Then I woke up. Sweating, heart pounding, adrenaline surging…

What’s wrong?!

Oh, yeah.

A letter to Elwood

2012-04-29T00:57:53Z

It's been a while now since I lost you. Your death was sudden and shocking. You were young and healthy when you woke up that morning. The vet explained that it was autoimmune hemolytic anemia. He said he could treat it, but that didn't feel right. I had only minutes to decide, but I've gone over those minutes many times in the last two and a half years. I think it was the right decision. You had so many mysterious health problems that I think it would have affected your quality of life if I had accepted treatment. I believe more than ever that it was better for you to let you go when I did, before you really, truly suffered.
But it is your life I want to write about: your wonderful life. You were such a thoughtful, caring dog. I never thought an animal could be so generous, or so considerate. Thank you so much for taking of Spider when he was a kitten. You made such a difference in his life. Do you know that he looked under the covers for you every night for six months after you went to the rainbow bridge? And he never slept there again. I think in some way he still misses you. But I also believe that he learned from you how to be a friend. He is very patient with all the other cats.
I had known that dogs are good companions, and I have loved all the dogs in my life. But you were my best friend, Elwood. You and I shared some kind of bond that I've never had with another dog.
You were so lucky, Elwood. Even though you had only five years on this Earth, you got to have two forever homes. I hope you remember your first mother, Annie. She was very upset to hear that you were gone. I sent her my favorite pictures of you, and I made sure to send the ones of you and Spider together. She loved those.
Thank you for your companionship, and for your friendship. And thank you for all you taught me about life, and love, and family. I will remember it always, and you are always in my heart. But you knew that already, didn't you?

A letter to Toby "Tobias" Jean

2012-04-27T03:12:04Z

Ever since the first day I met you, I knew you were a special guy. After what your previous owner put you through, the pain you were in, and a big bullet hole in your face, it didn't take any time at all for your mother and I to fall in love with you. As you healed up and we fought for your life in court, you proved that unconditional love is still possible. Even when you were fight against cancer, you never gave up on us. You kept playing with your toys, popping your balls (which by the way are still in the yard waiting for you), you fought to stay alive so you could give us happiness. And you did just that. You brought so much love and happiness to our lives. I only wish you could have stayed here with us longer. You will never be forgotten, You will always be missed. Say hi to Meisha for us and keep Spanky out of trouble. We love you Tobias.

A letter to Smokie

2012-04-24T22:10:27Z

OMG I miss you so much, every time i walk into the living room I think , Crap where is Smokie , i must have left him out in the back yard..... and then I remember you went to another place.

I know you are happy and enjoying the peace of being in that beautiful mother.....but I do want you to know, I am sooooooo sorry for the way you had to suffer and die alone.

I already know you have forgiven me and Thayer but OMG I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SIRRY. I MISS YOU SOOOOOOO MUCH
XOXOX

A letter to Daisy

2012-04-24T19:35:16Z

Hi sweet baby girl.I miss you sooo much.I lost you on Jan.30 2012 at 6:45 pm.You were getting sick and so i took you to the vet.Daisy i was not prepared for it when he told me you were dying.I agreed to try some new medicine hoping it would help but deep down i knew this fight was not one we could win.
You kept getting sicker and you were struggling to breath i could not watch you suffer anymore.I made that awful call to the vet to let him know it was time.
God how i cried girl.He came to the house that night and you passed peacefully in my arms.I knew when you died i felt you go.I had you privately cremated and now you are back home with me.I will never understand why your previous owners were so cruel to you.A pitbull the most noble of all dogs what a shame.
You were such a crazy little clown.I used to call you my little goofy girl.
Remember christmas mornings Daisy.I would run into the bedroom and shout wake up santa paws came.You and Sweetheart would run down the hall to the living and you would tear into your gifts so excited.Sweetheart always went for her stocking first.I have so many happy memories of you girl.You were so scared of everything when we first rescued you.It was so rewarding to watch you blossom and watch you grow into a beautiful confident happy girl.The funny thing is that you probably forgave your abusers within one hour of your rescue.I am still wishing them eternal torture .A dog as wonderful as you they hurt you so bad.I'm so sorry for that little girl.I love you Daisy I will ALWAYS love you.The day you died my heart broke and my world crashed.I hope when it is my turn to pass that you will be there at the bridge waiting with that silly little grin you always had,we will run to each other and be together again but this time for always.I will never forget you.RIP my sweet baby girl Daisy.You brought me so much joy and happiness.Thank you Daisy for being my furbaby.

A letter to Pluggyboy

2012-04-23T06:27:58Z

My beloved, my dearest sweetest little baby boy! We rescued and found more love than we could have ever imagined. We knew you were full grown but didn't care. You gave us more love and affection and I still to this day cannot understand why your previous owner gave you up. But, I hate to say it, Boy, am I glad they did!!! Because WE got you. And loved you until the day you passed. We loved to cuddle in bed in the covers with you, all we had to say is "go nite nite" and you ran to the bed wanting to get in your stop. We laughed at your playful bouts you would have and especially your toys. All I had to say is the word "toy" and you would go crazy. We must have purchased over $10,000 for toys at Walmart. Only latex toys you would play with. Sometimes I had to hunt and hunt for them to buy when Wallyworld would be out. When we walked through the door, we had to have a plastic bag with a toy in it just for you. You would go crazy and tear that bag up to get at the toy. We have a video of you wanting a toy and showing me where they were. You knew exactly where I hid your toys. It is my prize procession. I am so glad I was at home when you had your heart attack. I held you in my arms and comforted you until you passed. It was so sudden I did not know what was happening until it was all over in a matter of minutes. I truly thank GOD I was at home when HE decided to take you. You came to me because you didn't feel good and wanted to be picked up and loved which I did until you passed in my arms. I kept telling you I loved you and it was okay to go. You looked at me with those big brown eyes until they closed and I knew you had passed when you stopped breathing. We will always love you the most, you were our babyboy, our sweet baby Pluggyboy. RIP my sweet, sweet, baby, Pluggyboy. I love you. Momma and Daddy

A letter to Kaiser

2012-04-18T21:35:04Z

Its been 2 years now since you've been gone but seems like it could have been yesterday. I try not to let my heart hurt so much but its hard when you best buddy has been taken away too soon.
I often think of you and how long its been since I've been to you favorite dog park. We had so much fun together and whenever I was sad or upset, you always knew how to get me to feel better.
Alan says hi and he wants you to know he's taking care of me. I remember when he first started sleeping over, you wouldn't have it! You would creep up in between us, like if it was to prove a point :no one sleeps with my mom, except me!"...it always makes us laugh.
I miss your kisses, you talking "fits", the face you made when you had done something bad and your cuddles. I haven't been able to find another "fur"ever friend, I guess my heart isn't able to yet. I do know that you pushed me to explore the outdoors and find my true self. I love you for it my friend!
See you someday!

A letter to Fargo

2012-04-16T08:51:10Z

I miss you so very much, for 14 years we were side by side. I remember when we first found each other, you fit in the palm of my hands. You grew into the most beautiful dog, the most loving dog, the sweetest dog anybody met. Only a week as gone by since you left for rainbow bridge, enjoy, untill we meet again. You are forever in my heart, and in my thoughts. I love you Fargo

A letter to Mr. Weenie

2012-04-16T08:21:59Z

We miss you. I have a lot of regrets during that time that I cant shake. Leaving you at the vet when you were hurt to go to my sisters wedding. I thought we would come back and see you again. You must have been scared and lonely. The thought of you feeling like we abandoned you there torments me. That you may have thought we didnt want you anymore hurts me still. I wish we could have seen you once more before you left us. To comfort you and hold you.

When our mom found out she was devestated by your passing. She cried for a long time and she doesnt usually cry. She cried your name. Even dad was sad for you. We all thought we would have so much more time with you and that youd be with us for the rest of your life, which you were, but not long enough.

When you were injured I wish we had noticed sooner. But you layed in your bed and didnt make a noise. You were a tough a little dog. When brother noticed the blood on your other side...we took you to the vet and he wasnt there and we were turned away! You were bleeding out and i was so so upset I could scream. So we had to take you to another vet that we didnt care for so much.

To leave you there was a tough decision. To leave to another state while you were there was even harder. of course we thought youd make it...

I loved snuggling with you under the covers, playing fetch and tug of war with socks. The daycare kids were sad when they found out you had died. You were like a kid in the daycare too...a buddy a freind.

The vet wanted to creamate you but I couldnt let them do that. We brought you home to us. We took the IV's out of you...and cleaned you up. Then we buried you in moms garden that you loved soo much. Under the sunflowers in the shade where you would lay every summer and watch mom garden.

You are always with us in our hearts and memories. We did not abandon you Mr Weenie, brother tots, we love you and miss you every day. Daisy missed you too. She lays in your bed now and plays with your toys. I love you. We love you always and forever and ever.

A letter to Keymo

2012-04-14T05:55:16Z

Oh fuzzy puppy life isn't the same without you around I'm sure it is alot more quiet for everyone. I can still hear your nails clickingon the flooring as you walk and the usual wooooooooooooowooooooooooo when you had something important to say. The way you used to nuzzle your head in between our legs and wait for a good rubbin. A awsome watch dog and great camping companion! Our last outing was fun the dog park, the sunny car ride and the visit to grama's house and the treats. You sure were a tough old girl and got in some good time almost 15 yrs.

Miss you and watch your videos often, they make me smile.

LOVE MOM

A letter to Coco

2012-04-04T05:17:28Z

It's been four days since you passed away. Everyday I wake up and look over to where you use to sleep next to me and my heart breaks each time that you're not there. We shared 18 wonderful years together and that time together means more to me than I could ever express in words. There are so many things that I will miss about you. I will miss the sound of your nails clicking on the kitchen floor. I will miss how you use to wait for me outside of the washroom. I will miss how you use to follow me around the house. I will miss the sound of your purr and your beautiful, expressive eyes. I will miss how you use to sit by the fire that we lit only because it made you so happy. The list is long and continues to grow each day. You were a huge part of my life and I will always love you. Miss you, my dear little friend.

A letter to Libby

2012-04-04T04:21:23Z

It has been three months since you've left this world and not a day goes by that I don't mourn the loss of you, that I don't cry, that I don't wish for just five more minutes together. I hope that our decision ended your pain and suffering. Everything happened so fast and there were no good options. Neither Matthew nor I could see subjecting you to the surgery that may not have worked and, if it did work, would leave you in pain (and you would still likely die). Rock/ hard place. I never thought we'd be leaving the hospital without you.

I am honored to have been your lady. Your love and loyalty was boundless. I hope we were able to give you half the joy you gave to us. I don't believe I rescued you - I believe we rescued each other. I miss the warmth of your small body at my back, I miss your sweet, smelly kisses, I miss rubbing your belly. The house is empty without you here and I find that I call your name from time to time hoping you'll come running into my lap. I am sadly happy (is that even possible?) that I was there to hold you and kiss you and love you while the vet put you down. I cry almost every time I hear the song that was playing when you passed. I hope it comforted you to have me by your side. Your ashes are on the mantle now and I'm glad you are home in that way. I do not know if I will save them until it is my time to go and have us mixed together and released on the beach, or if I will plant a tree for you and bury them there. I still cannot believe you are gone.

I remember how sick you were when we first brought you home and how I would pick your clogged nose so you could breathe, how I slept in the guest room so you wouldn't be alone, how I brought you into our bed with the rest of the pack when you were better. Loving you is one of the best things I ever got the chance to do. I hope you know how loved you were - and how loved you still are. I miss you every single day.

Until we meet again, I remain your faithful lady.

Sleep in peace my little one. Be in pain no more.

A letter to Raggs

2012-04-03T22:49:25Z

I miss you so much I can't believe it's been almost 2 months since you left me. You were my "baby man", "my boy", "my Raggsie". You came into my life just over 2 yrs ago at the age of 12 yrs. You had spent 2 yrs being bounced from a boarding kennel to a shelter, then finally into rescue with your friend. You came to me from there. You filled my life with love and joy, and the 4 kitties miss you too, especially Smokey. He is still looking for you, hoping you'll come back to love him. I hope I made the right decisions during your last week, in hindsight, I wish I'd made different ones, but I doubt they would have changed the outcome. You died here at home, surrounded by your cat famiily and human family. I didn't want you to die alone in a vet hospital, you were my beautiful boy, irreplaceable. You were a beautiful soul, I won't ever forget you. I wish I had also been given the chance to get to know your sister, Muggs. but God had other plans for her and called her home at the time of your adoption. I pray that you have been reunited with Muggs and Fr Leo across the rainbow bridge

A letter to Brandy

2012-03-26T19:27:23Z

It was one year ago that I had to make the heartwrenching decision to let you go to a place of peace and good health. I grieve for you every day, not a day goes by that I don't think of you, wish I could feel your soft coat and hear you "whisper" to me. Daddy still sheds tears and misses you very much. Your little sister Maggie visits you every day where your head now lays. I see the light shine from your resting place and I know it is your love shining at me. That brings me some level of peace and comfort knowing you are always with me.
You, my dear baby girl, taught me how to love unconditionally. To give of myself to others without any reason to expect more in return. Your faithfulness and total love has made me strive to be a better person.
I love you baby girl, and will always have you in my heart. So until the day we meet at that Rainbow Bridge, know my love is endless and will never die.

A letter to Chloe

2012-03-25T20:57:22Z

One year ago today I let you go.

One year.

It has been a very difficult year and it has taken me this long to face writing you this letter.

I know it was time and that your little body was failing you in a way that I still can't comprehend, but saying goodbye to you was one of the hardest things I have ever done. The loss has left me with a hole in my heart that I know will never be completely healed.

I am doing my best to keep my promise to you that I would only remember you happy and healthy. It helps to focus on your smile, or remember the way you would howl like a fool at any squirrel or bird who dared cross your path. I keep close my memories of you and Murphy chasing each other in the yard, or the way you would sit at the base of the tree for what seemed like hours, watching for the squirrel you chased up it moments before. You sitting by the window, ever watchful and alert to the world outside. Your beautiful eyes that always looked so sad. I miss your lovely, little face, and the way you would snuggle up to me on the couch and nudge my hand with your nose when you wanted to be petted. This is how I choose to remember you, and focusing on these memories helps a little with the pain of losing you. The pain will fade, but the memories will last.

One year but it still feels like yesterday that you were here, a complete part of my life. I will never forget you, or let my memories of you go. You will always be a part of who I am, and who I become. You will always be the sweetest, most loving creature I have ever known. You were completely selfless, and you didn't deserve what happened to you. I am so fortunate to have had you as a part of my life. I hit the jackpot with you and I will never forget that, or stop being grateful for you. As much as it hurts, the memories of 11 wonderful years are worth the price.

Rest in peace, sweet girl.

I love you, forever and always.

A letter to Baby Girl

2012-03-23T16:26:42Z

Even though you left me over a month ago, it still feels like yesterday that I had to say goodbye to you. I say a prayer for you and Mingo every night. I know that you are up there right now playing with Mingo. The boys miss you so much! I cried for several days after you left me. I have often kicked myself for leaving you alone that day. I was trying to hurry and come back to you. I even bought you special treats that day to see if you could eat those without any trouble.

My heart breaks everyday when I come home and you are not there. We buried you on the hill right next to Mingo. I buried you in my favorite ratty old green t-shirt. I guess I wanted to make sure a small piece of me was with you at all times! Daddy colored your grave marker blue so I could see you better from the kitchen window.

There is not a day that goes by that I do not think of you. I often am doing things that I know you liked and catch myself drifting off thinking of you. You loved biscuits, and everytime I made them, all I had to do was holler biscuits are ready and you would come running in with this smile on your face. I can see you running off with the biscuit in your mouth (most of the time the biscuit was bigger than you). Or when I fried bacon you would hang out in the kitchen under my feet licking the floor, and I was always afraid that you was going to get popped by hot bacon grease.

Poncho really misses you. Please don't think that I am trying to replace you, because Lord knows that NO ONE can replace you, but we got another dog. Daddy said Poncho was acting funny and he was worried about him. Kind of like when Mingo passed away, daddy was worried about you so we got Poncho. The new dogs name is Daisy. She is really a good dog. She really looks alot like Mingo, except she is a different color. Daddy said that Mingo would have liked her, I think you would too.

I miss you laying next to me in the recliner or giving me all those great "kisses". It is warm weather now and I can see you in my mind laying in the front yard soaking up the sun. You loved to do that. Anytime the sun would shine and you could find it coming through a window in the house, that is where you would be. I was remembering the other day when we had a terrible thunder storm the time we lived in Ironton. A bad storm hit and you got out of the fence through a small hole and ran off (you were so scared of storms). I ran all over the block looking for you in the pouring rain and lighting. I finally found you after searching for what seemed like forever. To this day I still want to tear up when I think about how I could have lost you that day.

I hope that you are having fun up there with Mingo. Please know that you are in my heart and always on my mind. I am sad that you are gone, but I am glad that you are no longer suffering. I love you and miss you so much my sweet girl! Until we meet again. Please give my love to Mingo also!

A letter to Billy

2012-03-18T21:58:25Z

You'd wait for me to come home from school, siting in the windowsill. I'd press my fingers to the glass, and you your nose. Then I'd tell you I'd meet you at the door, and there you'd be, waiting for me to pick you up so we could touch noses. It was our tradition. To this day I blame myself for not having put you to sleep. I'll never know if you suffered out in the woods behind my uncle's house because one of his dogs chased you into the woods and no one ever saw you again.

I'll never know. And that guilt will stay with me always. But sometimes at night when I'm lying in bed reading or listening to music, I'll feel the bed press down and little cat paws walking or sometimes kneading the bed beside me. I'll look over sometimes and see that Odin, my now 1 year old cat, is lying on the floor. That's how I know it's you come to say hi. When you doe, I know you've forgiven me, but oh the pain.... You were only 5 when I last saw you.

I was there when your mother gave birth to you. It was a miracle you survived because one of your siblings sliced open the skin on your neck. But we treated it with peroxide and watched, hoping. You'd be 17 now. A ripe old age for a cat. If you were still with me now, I'd have to prepare myself for your passing soon. But you've long since walked to the rainbow bridge. I know because you'll curl up next to me, but I can't see you.

You were so smart. You could walk on a harness and leash. I remember the neighbors applauding you when we walked together. You were never nuetered, but you knew better than to spray, too. You were a good boy, and the best of friends. You'd eat most anything, but oh how you loved your catalope.

I hope you've found my Gypsy, Alex, and all the rest. They are your siblings, ya know, so take good care of those that need your protection. I love you so very much and not a day goes by that I don't think of you. I miss you so much. They should never have taken you from me. When they did, they took everything. One day I will see you again, my Billy. My best friend.

With love always ?

ps
I'm sure I'll write to you again, and I'll be sure to post a picture so everyone can see what a wonderful and sweet boy you were.

A letter to Loki

2012-03-18T02:02:39Z

Some people will say, "but he was just a rat!" but no, you were my buddy. I don't know why, out of all the rats we had, you were the one who latched on to me the most, but I'm so glad you did. Our bond was stronger than I ever thought was possible between human and rodent.

I still remember how you tried to play with Clover Cat, and how she was scared of you--even though you were so tiny! You loved playing with Taz, too; she's gotten to be a fat, lazy ferret in your absence.

Even though I'm a thousand miles away from that little apartment we shared, I still think of you every time I eat ramen noodles. You were always so happy when I'd give you one (and don't tell the other rats up there in rat heaven, but I always thought you were the cutest, too!). The way you'd curl up on my lap, or up on my shoulder in my hair when I was lying on the bed...I knew you were doing it not just because you needed a warm place to sleep, but because you cared about me, too. I miss your little rat kisses, the way you'd try to clean me as if I were just another giant rat.

Loki, I miss you and Ryu and Zeus so much, and I hope someday to have rat companions like you all again. You taught me that even the smallest of creatures have big hearts. Thanks for being my baby for the little while that I had you.

A letter to Lizzy

2012-03-03T14:59:39Z

I miss you so much... I can't believe you are not here with me. I think I hear you at night when I am about to drift off to sleep; I pray that I dream of you just to be able to see you again. You gave me 17 years of unconditional love, I only hope that you knew how much I loved you. Taking you to the vet was the hardest thing I have had to do. I know you were stressed and you didn't understand what was going on. You seemed so lost. There is not a day that goes by that I don't wish you back here with me. I can remember the day we bought you home all the kids in the neighborhood loved you; you were so tiny and cute. You grew into this wonderful family member you weren't just a dog to me. I don't think people can understand the bond between us. You loved me no matter what my day was like. I miss watching you have that love-hate chase with the squirrels in the back yard. I think they miss it too! People tell me that I need to get another dog, but they don't get it. You weren't a dog... you were my friend, family, and confidant. You understood my secrets, my pain, my sadness, my joy, my happiness. I miss you so much; I love you always and forever

A letter to Frankie

2012-03-03T00:24:44Z

Has it been only 5 days since I had to make that awful, impossible choice? How can it be that you were okay on Saturday, then paralyzed on Sunday? I have so many regrets. I should have taken you to the place in Cooper City. The other vet was WRONG! I have so much anger because if she had given us the right information, we could have saved you in time.That night, when the second vet talked to us, I knew. I knew in my heart that you would not recover. I knew you would have HATED being in the cart, unable to run and play fetch and chase the cat. The pain that night and every day since is searing. I feel as though someone reached into my chest and ripped off a chunk of my heart. I know you knew how much I loved you, Baby Boy. I couldn't tell you enough that night, that short while I had to spend with you for the last time. I look for you everywhere in the house. This house is filled with you. I think I hear breathing in the morning, in the corner now empty by the TV. I look for you on the bathroom rug as I get ready for work. I feel your warm little body lying next to me on the sofa at night.
I dread walking in after work and not seeing your long little body dancing in circles for joy at seeing me. I miss holding you and kissing your snout and soft little head. I long to run my fingers through the silky hair of your ears.
I want you to know that I forgive you for everytime I walked into the kitchen and it had "snowed" because you had pulled all the stuffing out of your bed or toys. For everytime you had a party with the bathroom garbage or tore up whatever was in the Walmart bag from the store. I have not been able to eat peanut butter because you loved it so much. I think for the rest of my life, I will think of you each time I eat it.
Frankie, how I MISS you. You filled my arms and heart with so much snuggly affection. I have the girls and Mark, but your love was a different kind. I knew that no matter what, you loved me. I could do no wrong in your eyes, and you never got frustrated or mad at me. When I think about how you loved, I believe that it is a reflection of the way God loves us. No matter what we do, He loves us and forgives us. I have to believe that one day in Heaven, you will be on my lap again. Right beside me every step I take. We will go for our walk as the sun is setting and enjoy God's creation together. The Bible says that there will be no tears, only joy in Heaven. That tells me that you will be there.
Thank you for the 4 years of joy and love you gave me. It was not nearly long enough. You were so young, so alive. I will always picture you that way. You will always be my baby boy. Of all the dogs I've had, I had the greatest bond with you, my beautiful Dachshund.

A letter to Bo

2012-02-23T01:49:36Z

You left us too soon. Even though you were 15 years old, you still were running around with the horse and rummaging through dead deer carcasses that you loved to drag home from the timber. You were a typical farm dog: pretty much invincible. I remember how bad dad felt the day you died, he cried for days on end. But it wasn't his fault, you never EVER slept under cars so why would he check on that sunny fall afternoon? You were losing your hearing, (either that or you were getting old enough that you knew you didn't have to listen to us), and it looked like it was a little harder for you to get up from your bed than usual too. But still, you didn't fool us, we knew you were still that 1 year old border collie inside. The one with boundless energy and the brains to outsmart us. You would play fetch with me, even when you were losing your teeth and your muzzle was getting gray. You were such a handsome dog, and I miss you every time I return home to see the horse. She misses you too, you were her best friend and constant companion. You never left her side. I know dad feels horrible about running you over, but I know you have forgiven him. So if you could please send him a message that brings him peace. I love you Bo bo, and I can't wait until I get my own border collie.

A letter to Virgil

2012-02-16T03:26:25Z

I can't believe that it's been almost eight years since you left this world. I think of you every day. I really mean it. Every day. I have two cats now, and I often find myself telling them about you. My cat Apple reminds me so much of you; your personality. She is pretty quiet, but lets me know when she feels I'm not giving her enough attention. :-)

My other cat, Buddy...he looks a lot like you. I wish you could meet him. You could teach him a thing or two. He drives us crazy! But I love him very much.

I miss you, Virgil. I miss the way you would wait for me to come home from work and greet me at my car. I miss the way you loved to eat Pringles. And swiss cheese. I miss the way you would sit with me on the porch and listen to everything that was on my mind and on my heart. You truly were the best friend I have ever had. I know you're in Heaven. I just know it. You were the best thing to ever happen to me, and my life has just not felt complete without you. I love you, so, so much. I am crying as I am writing this, because I miss you, and because I remember all of the good times we had together. I remember the day you were lying in the grass, and our other cat, Shell, walked by you. You reached up and smacked her butt as she walked by. She turned around and hissed at you. That was so funny. Haha!

I'm sure this will not be the last letter I write to you. I have so much to say to you. Like, I am so sorry. I am so sorry that you had to suffer for so long, and I didn't know it. I am sorry that I didn't take you with me when I moved away for school. I love you so much, Virgil. I hope that somehow, some way, you know that. And that you have not forgotten me. Because I will never, ever forget you.

I love you buddy. Keep my spot warm in Heaven!

A letter to Murphy

2012-02-15T18:12:18Z

This morning I woke up to the awful news. At first I wasn't sad, just in shock. But as I spoke to Mom about what happened, the tears began to flow. I am so sorry you had to go through all of that pain. I'm so sorry that you couldn't speak and tell anyone what was wrong. I hope you weren't hurting for too long. I have broken down 3 times already at work today thinking about you, and mostly about the loss Dad is feeling. He loves you so much and I just can't imagine how he feels. Lyndsey said he went down and just looked at your crate 3 seperate times last night. :(

I hope that you are in a happy place. I hope you are chasing all the deer you want, and are peeing on as many trees as you please. Please tell me there is a garden wherever you are, and that you will be able to eat the tomatoes when they get too ripe and fall off the vine.

We will never forget what a kind and loving soul you are.

I love you.

A letter to Mabel

2012-02-01T14:10:26Z

With heavy hearts we said goodbye to you in October of last year nearly 4 years after you beagled into our lives on a Christmas day. We knew your were an elderly girl at the time, but you were very hardy and really did great until the last month or so of your life. You were my first beagle but won't be my last. I know know why my husband is so in love with the breed. You were the most affectionate, funny and LOUD dog I have ever met. All that in a 20lb old lady. I miss you hustling up to me and heaving a big sigh as you sat down in front of me and demanded your petting time. We spent lots of nights on the couch together. Knowing you taught me about being happy to be alive, about relishing a good smell (not necessarily a pleasant one), about loving the winter sun and the airconditioning on a hot summer day. When we arrived at a park for a walk, everybody could hear you as you barked and carried on while we unloaded all the dogs from the car. Bunnies and squirrels were wise to take notice. I loved the way you greeted every meal with such enthusiasm that you would bark with joy, lifting your front feet off the ground and making your ears blow back! We planted your ashes under a new red maple in the back yard and I greet your tree every morning. I am finally writing this today to honor the anniversary of Pushkin's passing. I hope you are both making noise and running the show where ever you are now.

A letter to Sierra

2012-01-25T03:09:38Z

It’s been three weeks since I made the hardest decision of my life, the decision to let you go. I still struggle with whether or not it was too soon. Should I have waited one more day? I wanted you to be with me forever.

I’m sorry I did not educate myself sooner or find resources sooner to help me with your renal disease. I hope you can forgive me. I don’t know how I missed the warning signs. And then you just progressed so quickly. I know all the work travel and being away from you did not help. And I am so sorry I was not strong enough to say no to the travel until the very end. I am grateful I was able to bring you home and nurse you for the last weeks of your life. I will never forget how you seemed so grateful for everything I did for you. Your tail wagging even when I know you weren’t feeling well.

You have taught me so much over the last 13 years. Stop and look up at the stars, take a deep breath and sigh, it’s ok to rest your head on someone else’s shoulder and take a rest, have patience with children and the elderly, slow down what’s the rush, enjoy your food it’s so good, snow is wonderful to play in, stretch out in the grass on a sunny day it’s good for the soul, the woods are one of the best places to be, listen to the quiet, don’t work so much have some fun, give people a chance you might find a new friend and so much more…..

I promise you I will try to remember all the things you taught me. I’m only human so I hope you will give me a nudge from heaven when I need one.

I think of you and miss you every day. I hope you know how much I loved you and still love you. I miss singing to you in the morning “good morning, good morning, good morning to you” and you my snuggle bunny giving me a grin and kiss. I miss you when I come home to our empty house, no wiggle butt greeting me. I know I told you a million times but it bears repeating, you were the best puppy in the whole wide world and adopting you was the best thing I’ve done in my life!

I’ll love you forever.

A letter to Allie

2012-01-23T22:32:17Z

It was 2 years on January 8th. I still miss you everyday. I find myself thinking about you and the tears just come. I will never get over losing you and I pray that I will see you in Heaven someday. We never had any idea that you had cancer and I am so grateful that I didn't have to watch you suffer with it. I will always hold a special place in my heart just for you. You were there for me through alot of sad times and of course alot of happy times. I miss you being pressed up against me in bed at night so much. I miss those eyes that held so much love in them. I miss your kisses and the way you were always my shadow. I will always love you and I am so grateful for the 10 years we had together. I love you my precious girl.

A letter to Murray

2012-01-21T00:39:46Z

The day I saw you on Petfinder I knew you were meant to be mine. When we went to the shelter and you were gone my heart was broken. But somehow two weeks later you came back and I didn't let you get away this time. My furry Murray cat...the way you ran to the top of the cat tree I thought you would one day tip it over or fall off but you never did. Those few times you decided to venture outside without me knowing scared me to death...thank you for not going far! I miss you purring in my lap and chasing you around trying to get the hair out of your mouth after you groomed yourself. When the vet told me you had a heart defect that only large dogs usually get I was in shock but vowed to do anything we could to make you comfortable. It was hard not knowing when your little heart would give out but you took all your pills like a champ and we had some good quality time a lot longer than they all thought. After we lost your sister Squirty it sure was tough because we could not be there with her. The day your heart finally gave out was tough to see but I am glad I could be with you to help calm you and send you to the bridge from my arms. It was very hard to lose you and Squirty at such a young age but I hope you enjoyed living with us as much as we enjoyed having you in our family.....miss you and love you Murmeister!

A letter to Squirt

2012-01-21T00:23:46Z

I did not even know you were sick. You were such a strong little munchkin girl and never showed any signs. That phone call I got on vacation was awful...to have you be so sick and have to make that decision from so far away. Not being with you at the end was one of the hardest things ever...I hope you know how much I loved you and how much I wanted to be there holding you as you slipped away...to hear me talking to you and be able to see me there with you. The day I met you and you jumped out of the crate into my arms...those short little legs you were the cutest thing ever! I will never figure out how someone could just dump you outside when you were pregnant to fend for yourself...I am so sorry your babies did not make it but I sure am glad they saved you. Not many people had ever seen a munchkin cat and you were a great one! My little biker kitty! The toughest furkid in the house for sure...
I sure do miss you running around the house with those milk rings in your mouth growling like you caught a mouse! Or head bumping me from behind when you wanted some attention as I sat in my chair...
Please find Murray and Riggs and Maiijja and wait for me at the bridge so one day we can be together again....I love you and miss you little Squirtacious....my Low Rider kitty....

A letter to Riggs

2012-01-21T00:05:21Z

We moved into this home and adopted you the same weekend. The house is not the same without you in it. You were my momma's boy and my shadow.... now you are my angel. How I miss playing ball with you and your gorgeous blue eyes. You overcame many fears throughout your life and even became a AKC Canine Good Citizen...I was so proud of you for that. We had fun trying agility and you trusted me so much that you did everything I asked you to try!
I am sorry I could not do more for you and I hope you were not in too much pain toward the end. It was so hard to see you try and play and not be able to...or when you would bark at us because you could no longer go up and down the stairs. But those nights when you could not even find a comfortable way to lay down and sleep I knew it was time to let you go....there will always be doubts about if it was the right time that I will have to live with. But I could not see you suffer and be in pain and it sure wasn't fair to just keep giving you pain killers to delay the inevitable. I am so glad we took you on vacation with us this past summer and had that special time together. That is when I noticed you were having troubles walking but you were strong and still had fun! I am not sure how or when you injured your back but I hope we helped you to be as confortable as we could. Please wait for me at the bridge and find Tamaiijja....Murray....Squirt and all the rest and have fun...chase the volleyball and run without pain. Hopefully those thunderstorms don't scare you as much anymore either...I should have sent your Thundershirt with you....
I am still fostering dogs in your memory and we found a new family member that I am sure you led me to...his name is Ammo and he is very much like you. Loves to play ball...barks like you.... and is a momma's boy...thanks for sending him our way....
Mr. Riggs Rutherford you will always be in my heart and I miss you everyday....love you....

A letter to Baby

2012-01-19T01:05:29Z

October 1994, I called the shelter and you were the first kitten on the list of adoption. You were in foster care and when I came to see you my heart melted and I knew my life would never be the same.
But my worst nightmare has come true and I had to let you go. After 18 years and 4 months by my side your little body could not do it anymore and to make you stay here for me would not be right. You fought cancer like a champ and gave me one more year with you. Letting you go was and will be the hardest thing I will ever do.

You stood with me through every hard day I had. Every night I sat awake, every pain I ever had, every time I thought I could not go on. You were there and gave me a reason to stay. You gave me a reason to live you gave me strength to go on because I knew that I needed to be here for you.

My heart is breaking and I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what it is to live without you. Your Kitty sister looks for you. She goes to the bedroom and looks in and waits.

My girls, I called you my girls. My two little girls. I would do anything for one more time to hold you, to tell you how you saved me.

How has 18 years gone by so fast, how are you not in bed waiting to go to sleep. Waiting for me to make your food, waiting for me to cover you when you laid down to sleep.

You made me laugh, you made me smile when I thought I could not, you made me know that I was not alone.

I know I got mad when you hid before we went to the vet or before we got in the car. Or when you got on the rafters when I needed to put you in the bedroom when someone was coming to fix something at home.

But when I cried, you were there and you never left me. You would stay all day and all night. I can never tell you how much I love you. Word will never express how much you mean. I love you. My girl, my Baby, my heart.

A letter to Skye

2012-01-18T02:00:11Z

It has been exactly a year now since you left our family and went to live with Jesus on his great big house in the clouds and we all miss you. I made you a promise that I would write you every year on this day so here is my letter.
We all miss you a lot Skye and wish you were still here with us but anyhow, here are the updates. First of all, Luke got a new kitten! Her name is Lucy-Lou and she is adorable! Keyko loves her as she always is really good with cats, but Tayko hates her! It's really funny because the two of them sit and growl at each other all the time but they never actually get into a fight or anything! Now for some bad news. Luke got sick so he was in the hospital for quite a while but he'll be ok. As for me, I'm back horseback riding so that makes me really happy! Mum and dad really miss you too but dad doesn't want to het another dog since we might be moving to a smaller house and we already have 2 cats and a dog to worry about. Me and mum always talk about what kind of a dog we want to get anyways! Being at camp this summer was really weird without you because for my whole life, you and me always had so much fun together in the summer! I wish I could have done that much with you the rest of the year but daddy would never let you inside. I'm really sorry that you had to live outside, you must have gotten really lonely. Oh well, we have to remember the good times not bad right? You were such a good dog, even when you were bad, and you were the most loyal friend ever, always there when I needed you. And even though you were my dog, you were the best sister of all.

I love you Skye, and I promise, I will always love you. Even when I'm one hundred years old.

Love you always, E.S.

A letter to "Kellie"

2012-01-15T21:46:29Z

When you were 6wks. old I knew something was wrong with your eyes as they did not open all the way as your other 3 siblings.My husband said to go ahead and give you away to someone,but my heart said no.The Dr. said you had a birth defect and would never see in your lifetime,but for 17 wonderful years I had with you,you saw us.You were one Amazing little dog and never seemed to care or know you were different.You brought such joy and Love into our lives with you being here and Hubby nicknamed you "TweetHeart".When you were 4yrs. old I brought home a 6wks. old Pom,who we named and you knew as "Dundee".He was solid white like you and loved you so much.When you left us on 11/29/11 at the Drs. office and we brought you back home to "rest" Dundee still looks and searches for you.He got so bad after 3wks.of us both grieving I had to start paying attention to him,being the age of 13yrs. now ,I was afraid I would lose him too.He's doing a lot better ,but stays close to me.I can't bring myself to move your bed or blanket yet,I just want something of you still here.He gets in it every once in awhile checking your scent,and I still look toward it and can picture you there.I ordered you a beautiful grave marker and it has your picture ,poem,and a big Pink Heart on it,with your Nickname "TweetHeart."I'm trusting God to have a Place for wonderful creatures as you and I saw you in a dream and the sun was shining on you and you turned your head and Looked at me and actually saw me for the first time.I hope that was God's way of telling me He had you and you'll be fine.We'll never forget you My Kellie,and you are resting beside your Moma at the front of the yard where you use to chase squrriels that you could hear and not see.Lord help me when Dundee's time comes as I've turned All my affection to him,and he's become the most precious consoler I have,but I will place him beside you,where he stayed when you were here.You Look for me when my time comes as I will be Looking for you and all the others that's went on before you.For the first time you will be able to SEE me because you already know how much you were Loved and now Missed so badly,it just don't seem the same without you.Play in the Sun,TweetHeart" and we'll All be together again SomeDay,in God I'm Trusting that WILL Happen.Untill then We Love you,and You will Never be "Forgotten". Always in My Heart******Your Human Moma, Barbara & Dundee.

A letter to Lovey

2012-01-03T13:47:55Z

I'm so sorry to be doing this to you. You've been a part of me my entire life and I feel as if I'm betraying one of my closest friends. And right now if I had the choice, he would be the one taken out of the house, not you. You will never understand how important you are to me. You are my first pet. The only pet that is really just mine. I'm sorry this has to happen. I hope you find it in yourself to forgive me, because if you don't, I don't think I could ever forgive myself. I'm so sorry I didn't take care of you better, but I think I did the best I knew how. Even though you hate most people and sometimes didn't really like me, I know we respected each other and I've loved you since the day I brought you home.
My stomach is in knots. I'm not even sure I can go through with this. Its not even my decision but I'm still sick about what I have to do. I mean, you were such an important part of my life. I got you right after my grandmother died. She loved cats and had two of her own. And when she was gone and I felt this emptiness in my heart you really helped me to cope because having a cat was like having a part of her still. And now I feel like I'm losing you both now.
While you were antisocial and didn't seem to like me much during the day, I knew you still did because at night when I would be sitting on the chair or when no one else was home and I'd nap on the couch, you would jump up on my lap or tummy and nestle into me and purr happily when I scratched your head. I'm sorry I couldn't do anything different.

A letter to Boo

2012-01-01T19:25:19Z

You left us so suddenly December 30 2011, after less than two months when you came into my life. My heart and that of your beloved bunny gal Cinnamon are heartbroken. You brought us so much joy at a time when I needed it most. This was my first Christmas alone as I wait for my divorce to become final. I didn't think I would ever smile again, but you made me smile every day. Your blue eyes melted my heart every time I looked into them. When I walked by, I loved how you leapt onto your hind feet, seeking me out, wanting to be petted or held. You were a cuddle bun from the get-go through and through. Most importantly, you made my Cinnamon happy when I feared she never would be happy again, after losing Woodstock, the first love of her life back in July. Please look out for her from where you are. I fear for her. It is hard enough to lose one special being from your life; I can't even imagine losing two, in the space of only a few months.
I will always be grateful for your brief but brilliant and sweet presence in my life. I cry this as I write this; I don't know at this moment how I am going to get over this. I loved you the moment we met. Even before we met, when I saw your photo, I had this feeling you were one very special rabbit. I was right and Cinnamon knew it instinctively too and that is why you bonded so quickly.
Rest in peace, my sweet Boo. I know you knew how much you were loved. I am so glad we could give you a happy loving home for the last few weeks of your life. I am so glad you did not have to die at a rescue or in a home, neglected by those who had had no time for you. And I am so glad you got to know love from another rabbit for the first time in your brief life on this earth.

A letter to Shilo's Evening Rebel

2011-12-18T15:05:40Z

It has been 7 years, 9 months and 17 days since you left us. I still cry for you daily. Although Simon saved my sanity and gave me something to hold on to, you can never be replaced. My grief was so strong I did not want another puppy, but your daddy knew best what I needed...as always. I just want you to know that I eagerly await our reunion, when all of us will be together and whole again. I love your visits in my dreams. I believe I can actually feel your little nose on my ankle as you speak to me...yes, you have a voice in my dreams. I give you the treat you ask for (cheese, of course, your favorite) and then you tell me that you will be back. I am fiercely protective of Simon, as you know. I am so afraid I will lose him as I lost you. Time was too short for you, my Shilo. I will never forget you and I will forever love you. Just remember the last words you heard..."Mommy loves you, Shilo. Mommy loves you."
Always, Shilo, always...Mommy loves you.

A letter to Salem

2011-10-30T23:43:25Z

You had to leave us so fast it feels as if you are still here. I walk around the house and I feel you following me. I know you were a silly smelly dog, but I would give anything to smell your smell in the house again. I find signs of you everywhere. I see your toys, I hear the jingle of your collar, my daughter laughs at something that isn't there. I know you will protect her just as you always did before. Whenever she would cry, you would be there. Just like me. You were there for me whenever I would cry. We went through so many good and bad times together. You got me through it all. I was glad to be there with you near the end. Please help your Grandma. She is taking your passing really hard. We all love you so much. I just want you to be happy. We are keeping your favorite green puppy safe. I know how much you loved it. We miss you so much. It is not the same when we get home. We miss you jumping all over us. You were the best friend I could ever have. Thank you for being there for our family. You were part of our family and you will always be. From the first day I laid eyes on you I knew I loved you. Not just as a dog, but as my furry kid. I will show Quinn all of your pictures, and share all of the wonderful memories of you. Of the Elvis face you would make, how you loved to sniff her face, and how much you loved your girls (Grandma, me, and Quinny). I am letting you go Salem. You will forever be in my heart. I love you Bubba!

A letter to Snowball

2011-10-05T01:09:47Z

It's five days and three hours since you passed away in my arms. I miss you so much it hurts physically. You were my sweet, pretty girl - we found you and your puppies when you were roaming the streets more than 11 years ago. We found homes for your pups and you quickly settled in with us - but it took years for you to really relax. We got there, though, and we moved into a wonderful life together - you, your doggie "siblings" Cooper and Foster, myself and Baasje (Dutch for dog-daddy). When you were diagnosed with bone cancer almost six months ago and given two weeks to live we were devastated, but determined to make your last weeks the best possible. You kept surprising us, and we kept taking you new places - Starbucks, Three Dog Bakery, lakes and parks, Washington DC.... we learned you adored traveling as long as it was with us.
You started to decline faster a few weeks ago when you lost your ability to hobble (you could not walk well but hopped on three legs for months) and you could not hold your business anymore. We thought it would compromise your quality of life but you just looked at it as a way to give and receive more love. When we would change your diaper you would lie on your back, smile your beautiful doggie smile, and relish the extra attention and love you were getting. You taught me so much: how to be happy with what life gives you, how to live life in the present, how to be gracious and tender and courageous. You loved to be with us more than anything else. When you stopped eating and drinking last Thursday we realize your poor broken body was shutting down and you were going to suffer unless we helped you across the Rainbow Bridge. We took you to your favorite lake and I spent all afternoon hugging you, singing to you, cuddling you and you - you smiled your amazing smile and were happier than I have ever seen you. The picture with us shows your complete trust and your love with abandon - I cry every time I see it. Baasje and your doctor joined us there and you fell asleep in my arms, secure in our love, reveling till the end in the presence of your Vrouwtje and Baasje. I wanted to run away with you. I wanted to do anything except the horrible decision we had to make. I love you so much, and I miss you every second of every day.
You are and always will be my pretty girl. Please wait for me, I will come find you. Sweet Snowball, your love for us knew no bounds, and our love for you had no limits, either. We will carry on in your memory. We will go on "adventures" with Cooper and Foster, and we will cherish and celebrate your life. And one day we will be reunited. I just don't know how to make it until then.... the world is a darker place now.

A letter to Muzzy

2011-10-05T00:04:00Z

it has been a year and a half since you left my side. i just want you to know that i miss you. you were the best dog i could have ever asked for you were taken to soon only 4 years old not nearly enough time with you. just wanted to write this letter and let you know that we think of you everyday gone but never forgotten. love you

A letter to Twoee

2011-09-01T13:35:54Z

I really miss you and I am really sorry I wasn't able to be with you when you were dying. I am so sorry we left you in America when we went to live in the UK, and I really wish we could have brought you with us. You would have hated it there. We didn't have a big house there and there was no land for you to roam and protect. Thank you for guarding our house and always greeting me when I came home from school. I miss your loud purring! I miss scratching you under your really soft chin. You were my brother and part of our family. We miss you so much. Our family was torn apart when you died. I miss feeling your claws kneading my legs and arms, and feeling you rub against my legs. I miss petting your soft head. I miss seeing you chase imaginary animals around the yard and up trees. I even miss seeing you catch grasshoppers. It is summer now and you would love the weather. You would be rolling in the red mud on your spot on our hill. I feel guilty because we left you in America and we don't know how you died. I hope you had a peaceful death and are at peace now. You taught me to love animals, especially crazy shelter animals who used to be strays. My dog, Duncan, used to be a stray too. There will never be another cat like you. You were original, and amazing and we loved you so much!

A letter to Lilly

2011-08-27T16:23:28Z

I waited a year to write this letter to you. A year ago today I lost the furry love of my life and my world was never the same again. I look back at that day and wondered what I missed, if there was something I could have done to prevent your passing. It was a sunny day and you were lying in a ray of sunlight, I rushed off to see a movie and when I looked back, we looked at each other and then I left. I don’t even remember if I told you that I loved you before going.
When I came home, you were curled up in your little pet bed beside my pillow and I couldn’t understand or process what was going on. Later, I felt so guilty for not being there for you. You were the most important part of my life, you knew when there was something wrong with me and I missed something that took you away from me. You died alone without your mommy in a place that usually brought you comfort when we slept at night.
As I took your little body to the animal hospital I just kept thinking of how much I would miss you. While the hospital took all of my information to process your cremation, I held on to you and buried my face in your fur, trying to breathe in your scent and remember it. When it was time to let you go, I couldn’t. I just sat there holding you.
I still miss you. I miss coming home and finding one of your toys left on my bed. I used to always think that was your gift to me. You knew I worked too hard and needed reminding to play every once in a while. I still can’t think about welcoming another cat into my home permanently – not just yet. It’s too hard. I volunteer now at the animal shelter where I adopted you and sometimes I foster the kittens that need a place to stay until they’re ready to find their humans to spend the rest of their lives with.
Even that decision was hard to make but the day I went to pick up my first batch of kittens, I came across your picture – the one used to advertise you for adoption. I used to joke that the photo was of a face only a mother could love because you looked so miserable in it, but when I saw that photo, I knew you had to be mine. When I found that picture, I took it as a sign from you that it was okay
It wasn’t fair that we only got to spend two short years together. I don’t know what your life was like before I adopted you, but I know what my life was like after I got you. Nothing ever seemed as bad because we were together. Please know that I will never forget you, I will always love you and I hope one day to see you again. You will always remain the furry love of my life.

A letter to Angus

2011-08-27T01:32:03Z

We lost you today. Since we got you as a baby and thought of you as a baby, it never really occurred to us that you wouldn't outlive us. Parents don't outlive their children. I knew this morning that this would be your last day on earth and I watched everything you did. I have tried so hard to remember everything about you. You went very peacefully and I am so grateful for that. I know it had to happen, and I guess that you knew it, too.
I can't tell you how much the loss of you has devastated me. I see you everywhere. I hope you are happy and pain-free where you are now. Don't forget us. We will never forget you.

A letter to Betsy

2011-08-25T23:33:52Z

Summer's ending is quietly gathering now; she is soft pink skies in the evening, she is graceful and haunting, this gathering is my goodbye to Alaska. I am compelled to miss you, because I am leaving Alaska without you. I remember when we left for Alaska Betsy. It was cold. It was March. We were together. Friends picked us up in the evening. You and I said good bye to friends. We drove through the night to arrive at the Chicago Airport at 1:00 p.m. I had you and 2 suitcases. Our flight departure wasn't for hours. Our friend walked up to the check in counter and asked the airline personnel if I could keep you with me, my best friend. She said "Would it be ok for my friend here to keep her dog with her. Her flight doesn't leave for 7 hours and she is starting her life over today?" She looked at you and me, standing there together and said it would be fine. I sat in the Chicago Airport for 7 hours with you on my lap. We were starting over together. In moving to Alaska, I left everything behind except you. We were lucky to have this. You and me, every summer evening walk. Every moose encounter. The kindness of stangers to help a girl and her dog. Meeting a vet who finally cared about you as much as me. Alaska was so beautiful and kind to us. My heart is filled with sorrow that I had to say goodbye to you at all. But, leaving your ashes under that sweet tree in Kincaid park was meaningful. I miss your sweet face. I leave Alaska in a few days, because I will be without you...I am leaving everything I love here.
Rest Easy Girl.

A letter to Casey

2011-08-21T03:44:38Z

On Aug 7th after a completely normal day, Casey would not eat dinner, even the hotdogs we were having. She went upstairs and laid at the top of the stairs. She then moved to our sons bed and was panting and breathing very heavily. We knew something was wrong. By 7:00 we were on the way to the vet. They told us you had fluid on your heart caused by cancer. You never let on that something was wrong. By 9:30 you were gone and we still can not believe it. we are glad you did not suffer for a long time, but the whole in our hearts in really sad. You were the best, very quirky, had a mind of your own. I miss our morning routine of a rub at the top of the stairs and a treat and out. You always told me at night when it was time for the dishes. You learned quickly to ring bells to go out and even quicker that if Dad had ice cream and you rang the bells he would get up,put the ice cream down and you would sneak past and jump into his chair and help yourself. Funny girl..a corgi golden mix and so beautiful. You were best friends to the kids and tolerated all the fosters came and went. Ofcourse you had your favorites, but know more favorite than your beloved Jack who also left us way too soon. When I would look out and see your tail wagging a mile a minute I would know he had come across for his visit with you. So I guess you are running the fields with Jack now but you need to know we will always love you and thank you for the 8 years of unconditional love. We were not prepared to loose you but you know you were the stepping stone to L's love of animal work and as she soon goes off to college to study animal behavior know that you were a big part of her taking this path. M misses you more than words can say but we know he will find his way using his many happy memories of you to help him through. The house is too quiet and I miss you so much. Thank you for choosing us and loving us. Who knew the funny little dog with the big ears (almost as big as your body) would be such a wonderful addition to our lives. You've got your wings now beautiful friend...and you will always live in our hearts.

A letter to Vegas

2011-08-18T12:27:03Z

It has been 2 weeks since you went to sleep and each day I hope to find comfort in the fact you are no longer suffering...I feel so selfish that day has not yet reached me. I adopted you at a time when we were both broken, but together we healed. I could not have asked for a more loving, sweet or personality filled baby. My heart breaks each time I walk into the house and realize you will not be trotting toward me wagging your tail. I know somewhere you are eating hot dogs at the speed of light and bossing all those other poor doggies around because those were your 2 specialties...besides of course loving your family unconditionally. I would not exchange the sorrow I feel now for all the love, joy, & wonderful memories that you have supplied me but I just wish it didn't hurt so much! It would be a disservice to you if this letter was only filled with my sadness. I need to tell you how much you have done for me. You taught me that love is good & kind, & should never hurt. You taught me to go after what I want...even if I sometimes have to whine just a little bit to get my way :) You were always the last face I looked at before I went to sleep & the first face I saw in the morning...sometimes to your daddy's dismay because he was not a stranger to getting forced out of the bed my your strong, short, chubby legs! I am fortunate to have had you in my life 8 of your 13 years. It was a good run. I can't wait to see you again...but until then, I hope you know how much your family loves & misses you. See you on the other side my sweet poopers!!!!

A letter to Bran

2011-07-25T18:23:12Z

The floors that were scratched have now been refinished and soon so the carpet where you soundly slept.

I know when we "talk" that you are right there to listen; but oh, how I wish to see your smiling face once more, to call out "where's my boy" when I enter our home, to hold you and call you my little angel, my baby boy.

At the bridge of the rainbows I’ll find you I know but what about now when I need you the most?

Note: Bran, a Kerry Blue Terrier and the love of my life went to sleep in my arms June 17th 2011. He was 14 1/2. We tried everything; chemo, holistic therapy, no expense was too much just to hold onto him a few months more. But we knew that for his sake we had to let him go.

A letter to Toonces

2011-07-20T05:35:40Z

It's 5 years since you died. I still miss you so much. You don't know.

Toonces, I am so sorry for every time I lost touch with the truth that you were the love of my life. You know I always respected you. You filled me with respect, awe, adoration, and love for you. Neither of us was perfect. But together, we were luminous.

I try to keep you in my heart. I worry that I will forget your smell. I worry I will forget the stories of us.

But the pain I feel when I think of how your life ended never leaves me, and the yearning for you never leaves me.

Toonces, every love song makes me think of you. And when I close my eyes, I wish nothing but to feel you close.

I am so lonely without you. Things are so hard now. I don't have my best friend. I don't have my love.

Toonces, if I could go back in time, I would go back to 1999. In the apartment we both loved, where we were both happy. You in the window. Me dancing in the living room. Cuddling with you on the couch. Walking with you in the yard.

Sometimes we don't know that this is one of the moments we would give anything to hold in time.

I stared at your beauty. You were the most beautiful think I'd ever seen. And the smell of you was home to me. To be with you was heaven.

I am so sorry. I am so sorry that I left you at that horrible place. At that horrible vets. I should never have trusted them.

I can't stand to think about what you went through after they overdosed you, alone without me. Leaving you brain damaged from the insulin overdose.
Toonces, I would give my arms, my legs, my ability to walk, I would give anything to have that day back. I would give anything to save you. Please forgive me.

Please know that you are and will always be the love of my life. I am crying for you so hard. I will never stop.

When I am dying I will close my eyes, and dream that I am coming to you. I don't know about afterlife, but I know this:

My last thought will be of you. Love of you, desire to be with you.

You are my heart. Thank you for being my boy. I can never tell you how much you feel my heart. Please know how much I love you every day, forever.

A letter to Mohawk

2011-07-11T22:38:31Z

I can't believe your really gone, it still doesn't seem real to me. You were only sixteen months old when you went to live with Jesus. I can't eat or sleep and the spot on my bed is empty. My heart is forever broken when I see only one cat sleeping on the rocking chair. And when I cry there is nobody to wipe the tears off my face with their fluffy grey hair. I love it when you would wake up in the night and rub against my face and purr, and curl up by my face. I love it when you jump on my back when I come home from a long day, I love the sound of your purring, and the sound of your meow, and the way you look at me with your eyes when I open a container of yogurt for breakfast. I miss watching you try to catch the bugs on the grass, or stalk the leaves that blow in the wind. I miss watching you and Tigger "fight" and "wrestle". I miss seeing you in the tree's, and watching you torture mice that bravely wander into our yard. I miss the way you sniffed my nose when I would call your name and ask for a kiss. I miss seeing little grey paws appear under the door while I am in the bathroom. I Love chasing you around the house and when you jump into boxes and hide in them and pretend I can't see you! (even though the box is open) I miss taking you on car rides. I miss the squeaky sound you made whenever you were stalking something (lazer light, bugs mice, leaves etc.). I miss the way you would look at me and respond to me whenever I was talking to you, I miss the conversations we had. You taught me how to love others, and how to be tough when hard times came. You taught me that there is always loving you and waiting for you to come home. There are no words to describe my love for you. But never forget that I LOVE YOU. And I know we will see eachother again someday, and I will once again be able to cradle you in my arms.

A letter to Sweetheart

2011-06-29T18:06:35Z

I have refused to think about your death and life for so long because it broke me down that winter night... it broke my heart, I was so lost. I am so, so sorry. I wasn't there for you when you needed me most, I am so sorry. You have no idea how much I hate my cowardliness for not being there while you died. I was so afraid of my emotions, of how I might react, I had never allowed myself to feel that deeply before. You gave me freedom my beautiful girl. The stable didn't like us very much but that was okay... for the first time to me that was okay if someone didn't like me, because I had you. You were the most spirited mare in the whole place, no one could run faster and no one had as much zest for life. To this day I wish I spent more time with you than I did, I let life and all it's complications take me away from you. Please please forgive me for leaving you. I had to go away for a while, I loved you very much... I just couldn't stay. I wasted two years away from you and I was too ashamed to see you because I felt like I had abandoned you. I love you so much and I wish you were still here today so that I could tell you that. You were the most amazing companion I could have ever asked for. I only wish that I could have been that for you. As I touched your still warm body they said you had passed just a few moments before I got there. It was like you were still alive, your body was still warm, I wanted the whole world to disappear because I had lost my shelter and my friend. You were an extension of my soul, that is how I saw you and now I hope you are in peace, I hope you are up there with Jesus and he is stroking your nose and you have fields to run through. You deserve the world my queen. One day I hope you can forgive me for abandoning you. I can only promise you this... I swear that from this day forward I will make it a duty and calling to care with as much of my time and energy as I can for all animals I am blessed to encounter. I am about to adopt a horse named Cheif, I struggled with how you might feel about it but I believe that you would have been okay with it. You would have liked him. He will teach me much and I know that... but he will never take your place. You will always be my little Arabian free spirit, my queen, my teacher my friend. I love you, I love you so much. I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you.

Forever always in my heart. Forever always a part of my soul.

A letter to Amber

2011-06-27T02:06:16Z

You have made our house a home these past 16 years. I am remembering the times we have had together as I happen by them on my travels. Many of these memories had been forgotten until now.

I remember when you were able to take long walks and enjoy the fresh air and know that you are in heaven with my dad and with Grandma and others running through the fields and enjoying their company.

I feel a bit lost without you. Don't really have a reason to rush home after work to an empty house. Kitty is here and offers some support but miss your smiling face and walks to go outside.

I dropped off many of your supplies to the kennel you stayed in a couple of weeks ago and hope another senior dog and their mom will have good use for them. I kept your beds and the covers for the car seats.....just can't part with everything. Kitty is enjoying the beds.

Your ashes in the house provide some comfort to me. I have received many cards from those who have memories to share. Not sure if I can part with your ashes or where to put them at least for now.

I am so glad we were able to have that last weekend together and for you to be at peace at home. Mommy loves you.

A letter to Hannah

2011-06-14T01:24:07Z

I never knew how much damage i would have when you left.I knew you wanted to leave,you were in so much pain.And it hurts me to say that for my satisfaction i made you stay with me when really it wasn't about me being happy it was about you.i kept you her trapped in pain just so i was happy when you weren't happy and you were in pain.so i am so sorry.You had a great long life for a dog with arthritis that could barley walk,a heart mum er,brain cancer,and water in you lungs.You ment the world to me,i wish i spent every waking secound with you,i know i didnt now that im older,and no matter what i did or or what i said you always loved me.you were my best friend,probably my favorite (person) in the family.Even if people said that dogs dont go to heaven,i know that god would make a special place in heaven just for you.I miss you so much.

A letter to Hannah

2011-06-14T01:24:06Z

A letter to Hannah

2011-06-14T01:23:26Z

A letter to Hannah

2011-06-14T01:22:59Z

A letter to TrixieLU

2011-05-29T15:39:05Z

Dearest dearest BabyLU. Thank you for making your way to me. We only had 16 months together, but I could not have asked for a sweeter, funnier, more loving little terrier to guard over me and fill my days with fun. I couldn't believe when the shelter asked me to take you home - after the other dogs, you were kind of like having a cat! SO small, but fierce, oh my lord you were fierce. And SO determined. And so funny. And so so so loving. I loved kissing your little snout and I treasured our special greeting every single morning. I loved stopping at Tim's to buy donuts just for you and I loved pulling other dogs' hair out of your teeth when you thought they'd get too close to me. I slept in bed last night - first time in weeks. I will miss you getting me up for your pee at 5AM and I'll miss how you came to me for comfort time and again, esp these last weeks together, when you were feeling so rough. I'd do anything LU, to take away your discomfort and your fear. Please, please be on the other side and wait for me. It's truly all I want from this life, is to see you, and all my dogs again. Please god, make it so. I love you little one. I just love you so.

A letter to Jenny

2011-05-23T20:45:03Z

I remember you vividly, even to this day. You and I grew up together. You were the only friend when I was a child that never judged me. You never made me feel inferior because I am permanently disabled. You accepted me as though I was just your sister and not some cripple you were stuck with. I will never forget the day dad had you put down because at age almost 16 you developed throat cancer. Mother took me to get my hair done but, she made sure I knew when I got home, you would be gone. Jenny, I will never forget your goodbye to me. I will never forget the love I had and STILL have for you. Jenny, my first dog and my first REAL friend, please wait for me in Heaven. I want to see you again. Oh I love you so much. It has been many years now since I was sixteen and you were sixteen and dying. That night I wanted to go with you. Now, at age forty four, I really wish I had. All my love and thank you my Labradoodle before they were popular. Jenny, you will never know how to brightened my world. I have had and do have dogs and cats now, still but, I will never forget my first and very best friend. Dear God, please take care of my Jenny. She still means the world to me. Jenny, thank you and I love you very much, I always, always will!! Love, Dawn

A letter to Bandit

2011-05-17T05:09:41Z

You were my best friend for almost twenty years. When I got you, you were so small, I could hold you in the palm of one hand. You were the runt of the litter and we never fiqured out what breed you were, but you were the best compainon I could have ever asked for. Even six years later, there isn't a day that I don't think of you. I used to say that in a past life, you must have been an Old Jewish Banker. You had that hack when you coughed and when I would pour my piggy bank on the floor, you would kick it around and stare intently at it till some one made it jingle again. When I came home from work at night, you were always so excited to see me. I would get hugs and kisses for ten minutes after I sat down. I remember how you used to do your rounds ever night before bed and check the kids in bed, only after that were you ready to come and snuggle in bed with me. You made sure all was well in the world before we went to sleep. the day I had to put you to sleep was as hard as the day I buried Tony. That is a heartache I will always carry with me. To me the loss was just as deep as losing Tony. I pray at night that God has you and Tony in heaven together again.

A letter to Baby Louie

2011-05-17T01:48:08Z

When I got back from the vet that night, I only made it up the stairs because I was on the phone with Grandma. It was a distraction, otherwise I think I would have gone anywhere else. The pain of not having you here was overwhelming. In your almost 18 years with me, you provided more love, companionship and comfort than you can possibly know, or than I can possibly express. A few days after you left us, the vet sent a poem about the Rainbow Bridge. Below the poem are your very own paw prints. I touched them and realized it was the last bit of you I had..the last part of your life. You had touched this paper, and the grief consumed me once again. But the truth is Louie, you touched everything. You provided security when I was scared, when I had a panic attack, when I cried over the many changes I've faced. You were my constant, my star. Everyone was devastated that you had to leave us, and I wondered if I did the right thing. I still do. But I know you were suffering. You fought your illness and took your medicine for 7 years, like a champ. Your body seemed to be giving out, and that last day you looked so tired, so defeated. But Louie your soul was and is so strong. I love you with everything that I am and I will never, ever forget you. I was 18 when I first saw you and held you and every single day with you was a blessing from God. I miss you Louie, we all miss you, and I will cherish our memories always. Thank you for everything you gave to us all. Thank you so much my precious friend.

A letter to Nina

2011-05-16T23:34:41Z

Not a day goes by when i dont think about you. You were such a sweet doggie and I miss you so much. I wish you were still here with me baby girl. you always made me so happy with the funny things you did. i loved the way you always chased after the balls you found every where we went. I loved the way you would sneak upstairs at night and wait for your treat and fall asleep like a baby on the bed. I miss your piggy-like grunts and your cute fat little body. Nina, I miss every thing about you. I wish I did things differently for you near the end. I think about your labored breathing and how very skinny you got and i feel so bad to think that you were suffering. I remember the day you came over to me while i was sitting at the computer and I picked you up on my lap and you just cuddled there with me for a half hour and for once you didnt worry about Kendal getting jealous. Nina, what other dog becomes a teddy bear when sitting on mommy's lap? What other dog eats just about anything at all or lies on her side for hours when she thinks she sees a goody waiting underneath a peice of furniture? Or runs up to complete strangers for a quick hello and a hug? Nina i miss you so much. When i think that I'll never see you again i just want to cry. i can only hope that someday we will see each other again. When its my turn to go i hope i see you there waiting for me..I love you Nina girl...

A letter to Meatball, Lennox, Romeo, Judge

2011-05-16T20:07:52Z

You were a foursome to recon with. My fearless kitty Mr. Meatball who would wrestle with lennox and snuggle with Romeo. My gentle patient protective Judgie who never left my side. When your hip started hurting so badly that you couldnt get up the stairs to protect me I could feel your heart break. I would have slept on the couch for the rest of my life to keep you with me. My dearest Romeo, you lived up to your name and then some... you were the sweetest most loving bulldog I could have ever wanted. Watching your ears perk up whenever I entered the kitchen and knowing you were right on my heels was a great joy for me. Mr Ox.. my beloved Lennox. You were the embodiement of beauty and grace. You were as goofy as Marmaduke and as commanding as a soldier. I miss you all and there isnt a day that has passed that I havent thought of you. I love you all.

A letter to Cherry

2011-05-11T14:40:36Z

Love of my life, I'm sorry I couldn't save you... I think about you every day and wish you were with us. I love you so much and miss you terribly ! You are my precious angel and I love you with all my heart !!! My sweet, unforgettable, beloved baby...my priceless miracle... !!! ???...
Wait for me !

A letter to Brandi

2011-05-10T21:42:57Z

On June 12th 2011, it will be 6 years you have left me. I think of you every day still and even though the pain in my heart isn't as painful, it still hurts when I see your photo or watch a video of you.
Remember when you came back to me in my flower garden and spoke to me and told me to go to the nearest shelter & I will find them there?. Well, as you know, I found Rootbeer & Mandi there like you said. Rootbeer is the male version of you. Sadly we had Mandi his sister for 5 & 1/2 years and she was put down on March 10th 2011.

You were right on those two goldens keeping me so busy I wouldn't have time to think of you as much, and yes it got me out of bed after you passed away. I think a month in bed crying and taking sleeping pills was my way of coping with your loss during that month.

Because of you Brandi, I wrote a story of my loss of you and how you lead me to the Corona animal shelter in Corona CA and how I found Rootbeer & Mandi there. That story is now published in a book by a well known author named Joan W Anderson and the book just released is called "Angelic Tails", true stories of heavenly canine companions. Your on page 103 and she titled it "Beautiful Brandi".
I was so honored to have my story of you in this book. This author is the New York times best seller of the book called "Where Angels Walk". I want everyone to know how much I love you. My story of you is on our family website http://theblackmonfamily.sylera.com . Just click on the top tab called "angel Brandi" and its there with all of your pictures through the years we spent together.

I never believed in Rainbow bridge. Kind of thought of it like Santa Claus, but when you spoke to me that day in my flower garden and whispered in my ear about rainbow bridge and how happy you were there, I wrote a poem about it, and I'm happy to say is all over the internet on rainbow bridge sites and pet loss sites. I leave you with the poem I wrote that you put in my head to write. I miss you so much sweet Brandi and you will always be in my heart forever.
Love Lanie

Soft whisper
By Lanie Blackmon 12/12/06

My best friend spoke to me last night
a soft whisper in my ear.
I woke up and looked around the room,
I was startled, yet I had no fear.

My best friend said that all is fine
Rainbow bridge is so much more.
That there was so much love up there,
even a beautiful ocean shore.

There is fields and fields of green green grass
and the sky has different shades of blue.
There are flowers, mountains, trees and clouds,
everything they said it was, is true.

My best friend whispered in my ear last night
saying "Please don't cry or be sad.
That what was done, had to be done,
for me to live my life now, so be glad".

My best friend said that I did the right thing
an unselfish act on my part.
And that this pain & sadness I feel
will be gone soon from my heart.

I asked my best friend "How could this be
I miss you so much everyday.
That my heart hurts so much for you,
I wish there could of been another way".

My best friend whispered in my ear last night
"You will always be in my heart.
Go on & live and love another,
because we will never really be apart".

I carry your unconditional love with me
I have done this from the very start".
I whispered back to my best friend last night,
"I'll always love you with all my heart."

My best friend whispered in my ear last night
"it's time for me to go towards the light.
I just wanted to stop & say to you
go on my best friend, I'll be alright.

So good-bye my best friend as I looked up at the sky
a shooting star I see in a straight line.
Moving fast across the sky & out of sight,
I whispered,
"Good -bye my best friend, now, I'll be fine".

A letter to smokey

2011-05-10T21:04:08Z

it wass 18 days before u turned 5 yrs old wen your soul was released into gods hands.... november 4, 2011!! :( i miss you more than anything in the world because of the love we shared together.... the day you died i remember wispering in your ear.. i love you! i love you! i love u!... and then telling mom that your ear twitched wen i whispered into it!!!! i wish that i would have never went to go outside or else you would still be here..... door dashing was a problem that we should have fixed a long time ago but u were such a free spirit!!! going on long walks together, and doing ur wonderful tricks at the mrs.colemans dog walk/ talent show, are only some of my favorite things that we did together!!! when you passed away i new that you would be in my heart forever!!! everyday i think about you and everyday i miss you more... but things are to happen for a reason and i still havent wrapped my hand around why that cop car was there at that moment and why you had to turn around and run into the path of your death but i do no that you are in a happier place and that you are looking down on me and waiting for my time to go so that i can be with you once again!!!!... farrah misses you and we r goin to win the talent show for you this year soo that we can say proudly that we won it together!!! i miss you and i cant wait to see it again... have fun up there with bruizer and grandpa and pepper and princess!!!!!! tell them all that i miss them and that i hope they are all happier than can be!!! good bye but not for long

A letter to Harley

2011-05-10T19:02:54Z

When you came to me we both needed something. We were both missing love in our life. I had just lost a beloved pet, and you were neglected by your previous family. You are so sweet, thus you looked right into my heart and opened a door that was closed. I miss the sound of your pitter patter feet following me everywhere. Your sweet eyes could light up a room. I have had many pets in my life time, but never had one that touched my soul like you did. You were a angel sent from above.I miss you. I wish I could hold your warm fuzzy body just one more time. I love you Harley, thank you for your love

A letter to nubes

2011-05-03T04:57:28Z

Originally Written: 03 January 2009

You sleep so deeply... you sleep so often... gentle flowing breath... inhale... exhale... inhale... slow deep breath.

i think you run/dance in your night-time(s) or are you frolicking in the moon light?
i wonder what you dream? what you see as your eyes are blinking in your darkness?
little squeaks, i hope they are happy ones...

are you dancing in the warm waters and sands of your birthplace?
you do love the water... to swim... to splash... to stick your nose deep into the glassy wetness... and blow bubbles...

when i get nervous that your sleepy-time squeaks might not be squeals of joy, i wake you up... and in your hazy 'not-yet awake~ness' you look at me as i tell you i'm here... i tell you i luv you... so, YOU know... i know YOU know... (i know you know, because without failure you give me a gentle kiss EVERY TIME before drifting back to dreamland).

i know that i've been BLESSED with you in my life... my furry companion... you came to me at a time when i really needed unconditional companionship... unconditional luvin'... my mom had just passed on... you came to me and you were just present... you just WERE... you were MY love... these amazing, almost 13 years...

now they tell me your little heart is weak... i ask how could a little heart, so strong, be so weak... it scares me... i feel helpLESS... almost SELF-fish... i don't want you to leave... i do NOT want to consider that possibility... that inevitable reality... life is so fragile... such an unknown... i don't want you to leave me... i'm not ready... i get that, it's not up to me... i get that, it's not ABOUT me... but i don't want you to leave ME.. not yet...

so now i will love you even more (if that is possible)... love you like it was my last breath with you... your last breath with me... i'll go right up to your ear, i'll whisper that i luv you (so you hear me... feel my breath... through your old dog deafness)... so, YOU know... i know YOU know.

you sleep so deeply... i love you so deeply... you're 'just' a dog?...NOT!... you're MY dog... my four legged SOUL-MATE.

yes, when it's your time i'll let you go... so you can dance on the sands of your birthplace... so you can frolic in the (warm) waters of the place(s) we called home ... so you can curl up in front of YOUR fireplace(s)... so you can sit by my moms' feet at the eternal Sunday tea party.

STAY with me just a bit longer sweet girl... i'm not ready for you to leave... not yet.

and then...

you showed me the true meaning of LOVE... you taught me the ultimate freedom in SURRENDER!!... you shared with me the magic of deep beautiful PEACE, blissful inner CALM and bless~ed glorious COMPASSION!

nubes (the Nubian QUEEN: June 15, 1996 - June 30, 2010)

on your last day WE knew... YOU knew... I knew... we (with your bratty baby brother, cHoncHo) had a wonderful day of quiet-activity, after which we went home. we lay in bed curled up as a family, then you were gone... 14 + years of PURE LOVE!

August 2010: six weeks after my little girl took her final journey i saw this note again, for the first time... she did what she promised... she stayed a little longer... i did what i promised... i let her go... good bye sweet, sweet angel girl.. i miss you and love you so much... till our paths cross again... know that you were the BEST EVER!!!

May 1, 2011: I GET IT!!! LOVE! SURRENDER! COMPASSION! PEACE! I just realized that i am NOT SAD that you are gone... NO, rather your LIGHT(ness) exists withIN me! YOU were (a part of) ME! Memories of YOU and the LOVE, support, dedication, loyalty, integrity, pride, honour, truth, joy, playfulness, fun and BEING that YOU were... THAT spirit IS ME! Any 'grief' is out weighed by the BLESSING of having YOU share YOUR journey with ME... GIFTING me with so much... your journey of ease, grace, dignity, warrior spirit... for this i shall be forever grateful and thankful! It was an honour... indeed it was MY pleasure!

PS. cHoncHo's a big, happy, healthy, confident pup b/c of your consistent positive, loving and strong influence. He misses his big sis!

A letter to Mica

2011-05-03T01:37:54Z

It's only been a week since you went to heaven but it still feels like it was only yesterday, or only moments ago. The pain is still so raw.
I wake up and go to bed still expecting you to be there, and wishing you would be. Cuddling with you, and rocking you to sleep everynight is just one of the many things that I miss about our life together, there are so many things.
You brought so much love, joy and laughter to my life.
When you put your paws around my neck, your nose under my chin hugging me I felt so happy.
I was so proud of you when you learned all of the tricks I taught you. To sit, to give five, to catch your treats in the air and all of the other ones.
I miss you coming into the bathroom and playing with the bubbles when I had baths.
Nothing will ever be the same without you and thinking about you still hurts. I'm really sad and miss you terribly.
You were and always will be my little girl,

A letter to Jake

2011-05-03T00:03:14Z

I may Have taken you out of the kennel you were in only a year and a half ago but you were already in my heart while I waited to be approved to adopt you the minute I saw you I had to take you home, the shelter did not think anyone would take you because of your age and some health issues, but I saw hope in your eyes even after someone just threw you away. At fifteen you still had a lot of life left and at the time I had gained a lot of weight and was having a hard Time finding a way to lose it but you knew how I was out every day with you we went for walks,played fetch you even inspired me to eat better so I could keep up with you! You went every where with me my constant companion,no matter where I was in the house you where there. Then came the day you started to slow down you did not follow me as much you where sleeping a lot more, I knew your time here with me was getting short, but did not want to let you go but after the x-ray and the vet said your heart was enlarged I knew you were not coming home again you had congested heart failure and your lungs had filled with fluid the vet said there was also a mass in your stomach. I asked the vet for some time with you and we looked at each other and said good bye I kissed you you kissed me and it was time I held you though the entire time my heart broke that day on april fools day. jake I loved you so much you saved me as much as I saved you!!! I am missing you every day the house is so quiet,love you I will meet you at the rainbow bridge one day,wait for me love your very sad mom.

A letter to pinkee

2011-04-30T20:51:17Z

my beautiful beauty queen its been 6 days since you flew away...i want to start off this letter by telling you how much i mss you.more than anything i want you to know that i let you go because i love you..i will never forget the day i drove out to white plains to get you.and how absolutely adorable you were at 8 weeks old..in no time your grew into one of the most proud and beautiful american bulldogs i have ever seen. you carried that proud dominance throughout your life.and even though you never really cared much for other dogs you still accepted any lost soul in need that came through our door.which btw every single one of those lost souls grew to love and respect you immensely.i have never in my life known such sorrow.i have never felt such a bond with anybody as i have with you.i pray every day that you will be waiting for me by the rainbow bridge.i know you were trying to be strong for me and you were so defiant and strong til the end.you made me very proud.my beautiful punkface.please continue to visit me in my dreams and in every way that you can. right now my grief is my final gift to you.i will continue to save lives in your memory but please know you were and always will be my number one..once in a lifetime girl .i love you forever.

A letter to Rita Pita

2011-04-21T21:10:10Z

Everyone always commented on how beautiful you were. And it was true. I remember when we got you as a puppy, you sat in my lap the whole way home looking out the window. You smelled like poop so we gave you a bath and mom said you screamed like we were beating you. After you ate all your food, you'd pick up your bowl and drop it on the floor. You didn't do that when you grew up though. I miss you so much and I know everyone else does too. I loved how you'd eat laying down and had such an attitude that was full of confidence and spunk. Some of the best things you'd do was when we would be outside using a shovel or a rake, you would try to bite it playfully. You also barked at the vacuum cleaner which was really funny. You and your tennis balls. You always had a tennis ball. Whether you wanted us to throw it or just sit there and chew it. If anyone picked up a tennis ball and starting bouncing it, you'd come just because of the noise. After your hips started to go, I got really upset. I didn't want to see you in pain but you hid it well. Before you passed away, you were acting a little strangely. I remember you being surprisingly friendly to my friend Julia. We just assumed you were finally getting used to her. The day you left us was a really hot one and Robbie was home alone. I've never heard him that scared before he called me to tell you he thought you were dying. Me and Daddy didn't really believe him right away, we assumed you'd be okay. When we got to the house, we ran into the kitchen. You had already passed away. It felt unreal, and I wasn't really sure what do even though I dealt with that all the time at work. It was so much different when it was your dog. They never did know what you had died from. We assumed a seizure by Robbie's description and that your heart just couldn't handle it. I can't help but still think if I had been more observant or just noticed some tiny sign, you'd still be here. You were the pack leader, and I still can't believe your gone. I can't say I want another dog because all I want is you and I know we'll never get another you. We all love you so much, and while I don't have too many beliefs about heaven and what not, if anyone goes it would be pets. You were always loyal and slept in front of the door. An excellent guard dog that no one wanted to mess with. But then you would give tons of kisses also. There will never be another you and none of us will ever forget you. You are absolutely the definition of irreplaceable. I still can't believe your gone even though it's been almost a year. I hope you are in some sort of rest and paradise, where there's no hip problems and countless tennis balls. I love you so much and just really want you back.

A letter to Test

2011-04-21T20:23:29Z

Test

A letter to Test

2011-04-21T20:11:52Z

Test

A letter to Max

2011-04-11T16:32:09Z

A month ago we said goodbye to you and our hearts have been heavy since. We just aren't the same without you dear Max and we never will be. We knew your journey would end but we weren't prepared for the pain. You were the best dog anyone could ever have and you gave us an amazing 13.5 years of love and affection. I remember the time in the park when you stole that guy's steak off his grill and he turned around and yelled but it was the funniest thing ever! We love you for that. You were such a good boy. You protected us. You got through losing your brother and sister Wilbur and Daisy and we hope now you are all resting peacefully together. You were best friends with Marley and loved to chase Butch. You learned to love Henry the best you could and were always very careful with him since his accident. You were a big sweet boy and we loved you for that. We will miss you and love you forever Mushy boy. Sending love and kisses to you sweet angel. Rest in peace.

A letter to Sorbet

2011-02-27T00:21:48Z

It has been almost three years since I lost you and I still cannot live without you. I feel so guilty..would you have been here if I had stayed home from work? Was the vet wrong? Did I do something wrong? I feel so angry at the people who kept you on that chain and caused the injury to your spine that would take you from me.
I knew you were gone before I came home. I think I knew the night before that you were leaving. When the vet said you might be paralyzed forever, I was ok with it. I prepared to buy a cart, and to care for you. It was selfish of me. You could not have lived, unable to chase your ball or go swimming. You simply could not live that way, and your heart knew it. But, part of my heart died with you, and it will not heal.
You were amazing! I cannot believe that they called you a spazz and hyper. You were just determined and wanted a family. A chained life was not what you deserved. I get so angry, that your back was broken from abuse, and you had such pain sometimes. But, the good times were so great. I thought your labbie sister was going to follow you, she missed you so much.
I do rescue now, and I wonder how many dogs I have to save to make up for not being able to save you. Four years was not enough time, and you deserved a much longer life. But, like a star- you simply burned up. And, I cannot wait to be with you again

A letter to Shelby

2011-02-13T22:21:14Z

A day doesn't go by where I don't think about you. We grew up together and you were the one who was always there for me, whether the days were bad or good. I lost you four years ago this very night- and I will NEVER forget how you waited for me to come home from work, how you waited until I was by your side, petting you and telling you how much I loved you- how you waited for me to be there before you passed. When I think of how much you truly loved me enough to wait until I was there, I can't help but cry and cry.
I am so grateful for every lesson you taught me about love and life; you helped shape me into the person I am today. You took a piece of my heart that day- and that piece continues to ache for you, love you, and constantly look for signs of you watching over me. I know we'll be together again one day, and that you'll be waiting for me on the other side of the rainbow bridge.
Give kisses to the others for me, and tell Sammy that I still hear him sometimes. I wonder if he pops in to visit every once in a while.
My sweet, furry sister... I love you.

A letter to Deejay

2011-02-12T13:25:05Z

Not a day goes by that I don't think of you and miss you. It has been 2 months since we lost you, and the pain of that day is something that I carry always. I know that it was quick, and I am so glad that you didn't have to suffer for a long time. I am so sorry that we didn't see your illness until it was so late, you were so strong, and you hid your pain so well. Everything is different now that you are gone, you have no idea how much you changed my whole life. I love you so much for your unwavering loyalty and constant companionship, and I am so glad that for the short time that you were with me that we did everything we could together. I still look for you every day when I come home, and I miss the sound of your toenails on the floor, dancing around the front door whenever you heard me come to the door after a long day at work. You have left such a hole in my life and my soul, and I don't know how it will ever go away. All I can say is that I love you Deej, and that I always will. Having you here or gone, nothing can ever change that. Part of my soul went with you that day. I love you.

A letter to Mora

2011-02-11T17:21:45Z

We went together with Pudge a few times into the woods to look for Keiko, but then I decided to take you alone with me because I was afraid of losing you, because you were so fast. I put a harness and leash on you, but you got out of it. Luckily, you came back. I called you and called you and suddenly, there you were: sitting there on a log right in front of me, looking at me! I put the leash on you again. I should have taken you home then, but we looked some more and then you ran off into the woods, and I couldn't see you anywhere. I called you and called you. This time, I couldn't find you. I finally gave up. But I should have just stayed there and waited for you to come back to me, because I know you would have. And maybe you would have come back with Keiko by your side, who knows?
I'm sorry Mora. You were a brave girl. You were my Amazonian lady ferret. Even if you were trembling in fear, you'd always go scout things out first for your sister, Pancha, and your adopted sister, Keiko, and your guy buddy, Pudge. You were very protective of them. You repeatedly attacked any other ferret whom you felt was a threat. Most people wouldn't appreciate you for that, but I understood your courage and dedication to your family.
You and Pancha had been with Pudge since kit-hood, I imagine. You all came to me with behavior problems, so I believe you were all abused in some way. Pudge bit me so hard when I first took you all in that I ended up in the ER, getting XRays, antibiotics, and a tetanus shot. I had to quarantine Pudge for 10 days after that, by command of Animal Services, and many people told me to have him put down. They would've said the same about you because you attacked Fidget, scratching her cornea, almost blinding her. I forgave you (although I didn't let you near Fidget again) and loved you.
You lost Pancha, your sister, who contracted lymphoma. Then you lost Keiko. Every day you wanted to go looking for her. After losing them both, you wanted to find them, especially Keiko, I think, because you must have known Pancha was ill and Keiko wasn't. I'm sorry I lost Keiko, Mora. I'm sorry I lost you, too. Pudge missed you guys a lot. He got very sad after Pancha died, and you and Keiko got lost. He lived two years after you and Keiko left. He became the most gentle guy and he and I were very close. I felt he didn't want to let go because he knew I was sad about losing you guys and he was staying for me, but his life had become only pain, humiliation, and struggle -- as he could barely hold himself up to take walks anymore with me and he would soil himself and his bedding. So I finally had him put down. He went very quickly and gently. (Just like Fidget did when she went so long after her mate, Bob.)
I hope you are all together now wherever you are. I love you and miss you all. And Mora, you will always be the most brave Amazonian ferret to me. Take care of Keiko and Pancha and Pudge, please.

A letter to Keiko

2011-02-11T16:57:33Z

I miss you every single day, even though it's been two years this March. I still feel responsible for your escape and for my failure to ensure your return or to find you. You were a beautiful creature to me, the sweetest ferret, kind, gentle, loving and playful. I'm so sorry I didn't do enough (and quick enough) to get you back safely.
I know you are now in the other world beyond this one, whatever that may be. I don't believe in God or Heaven, but I do believe that we all return to spirit or light. I hope you can hear me. I know you were so frightened that night after you got out and the thunder and lightning were so loud and scary and the rain so torrential. I know you were terrified and that's what make me feel most grief. Not knowing what happened to you is also very hard. Somebody spotted you a few weeks after you escaped and I had distributed to neighbors more than 40 "safe boxes" with ferret food and bedding inside. And then a month later, someone thought they saw you crossing a road into the woods. If so, if it was you, you found a good place to hunt and survive. There are streams in there, and lots of burrows (many unoccupied), and lots of food sources. I hope you did not just starve to death out there. Even imagining that an owl or hawk or fox got you and killed is better than that.
I hope you had a good remainder of your life. I feel terrible that you thought I didn't want you back after you got out. It was an accident, but I think you felt I didn't let you back in. I didn't know you were gone right away and I didn't open the fence or make a way for you to get back, because I was afraid the other animals were get out. My mind didn't work well at that time and I still don't know why. Other things were going on. I had relied so much on my 19 year old daughter. She was so intuitive and wise, and I asked her what she thought I should do and she wouldn't answer me. I don't know why and even now, she won't tell me -- for she has grown away from me and is no longer talking to me -- again I don't know why.
But without her wise words, my mind shut down, which is so weird because every other time any ferret or cat was missing, I knew just what to do, and did it. So I feel like I betrayed you, Keiko. I gave you such a great life here and then I just let you go. It's not fair to you. It wasn't fair. I'm so sorry. I hope you will forgive me, Keiko. I love you and miss you terribly.
P.S. I hope you and Mora found each other (and Pancha, too) somehow, somewhere. I will write Mora separately, but say hello to her if you see her.

A letter to Cat Two

2011-02-08T17:16:55Z

I miss you everyday. I feel like you were my first real pet and responsibility and I wish your life was more fully lived. When you seized, it was probably the most frightening moment of my life thus far, because I was completely out of control. I feel like I let you down, not noticing the signs before hand and getting it treated if I could, but our time together changed my life. You had such a personality and I don't think I can ever find another one like you. The unconditional love you gave and your pure attitude was fascinating and always entertaining. I will always love you.

A letter to Celeste

2011-02-08T11:44:51Z

I miss you everyday. I am so incredibly grateful you saved my life in the fire. I am so horribly sorry I could not do the same for you and for Bernie, Carmen, Annie, Max and Chanie Marie. I blame myself for the fire - although it was accidental I will always feel I should have prevented it. You were my canine soul mate. I think of you daily and miss the unique connection we shared. By now you would have passed due to age or illnesss. But we should have had many shared years together. I know you are waiting to return to me - and someday it will happen. Please welcome Lucy, Sherman and Bubba into yout heart. They too are solely missed. This will be the first year since 1997 that I haven't shared my birthday with Lucy (or Sherman). I will celebrate for all of the ones who have gone on without me - including Spirit, Chance and Jesus. Wishing you joy, and fun and happiness as you continue on your journey.

A letter to Celeste

2011-02-08T11:44:45Z

A letter to Mingo

2011-02-04T12:25:12Z

Although it has been almost 10 months since you left me, it seems like it was only yesterday. My heart still breaks for you everyday. Me and Baby Girl was sitting at the top of the steps the other day and I noticed something that made me think of you and I said your name and Baby Girl sat and looked at me and turned her head when she heard your name.
God I miss you sooo much! Come warm weather I am going to go fix your grave back. I took in your lights and bird feeder for the winter. Hayden seen a picture of a dog that looked similar to you and he said, "aww look it's Mingy". That broke my heart. I know the boys drove you crazy, but they sure did love you, and miss you very much. Perry still talks about you all the time. He will say, "Mingy is up in Heaven watching us right now".
Daddy misses you alot! I hope you don't think I am trying to replace you, but I found a rescue dog and adopted him. Baby Girl was getting so lonely and I hated to leave her of a day because she would cry. His name is Poncho and he is... wild! Daddy is a little heartbroken because so far Poncho will not chase a ball or bring it back. He said "I need a dog that I can play ball with, like Mingo". Daddy is always thinking about you.
I was laying in bed the other night and thinking how I used to get on to you for licking the sheets or the pillows and making them wet, or every Christmas you and Baby Girl would keep drinking the tree water and snapping off the branches at the bottom of the tree. Gosh I would love to be able to lay down and see where you had been licking the bed or pillows again. I know that sounds funny, but it is true.
There are times when it is quiet in the house and I will hear the pitter patter of paws and no one will be there. I know that it is you letting me know that you are with us! I wish that I could see you again, and you would sit in my lap and lick me to death like you always did! Our house is not the same anymore without you in it. There will always be an empty spot, that no one will ever be able to fill. I miss you so much. I love you, and always will my precious Mingo!
Till we meet again one sweet day!

A letter to Puck

2011-02-01T23:00:10Z

my dearest Punkin head, my little love muffin, my best friend, and the first love of my life-
I loved you from the very first day I saw you. You were this little ball of fluff that fit in my hand, and you crawled to the top of the scratching post and over on to my head. I knew you were the one for me, my perfect match. I never regretted that impulsive moment. We drove an hour home with you in a box, with that little black bow tied around your neck. How did you figure out the untieing process? I never understood that one. we rode home with you meowing in your tiny cat voice untill I found just the right radio station to calm your nerves.
You loved music. My mom is gettign rid of the grand piano. She tells me the only reason she kept it was because of you and your need for the vibrations, and the sound. She loved your stomping down the stairs when you stayed with her, your demands to play music for you. We talk all the time remembering how you would tare ass around the house, then zip up and over the music stand and inside to curl up when she played. We laugh histerically at the day when she thought she lost you, turned out you were sleeping happily on the sounding board of that piano.
I dug out all the old photos i had of you, and came across the picture of your head poping up through the coffee table in my parent's living room. The cat fishing fun...
I miss you terribly, and I feel so horribe that our time together got cut short. at the end you were always on my mind. I had no problem carrying you around like my little baby, loving you and peting you. I miss your purr and I miss your smell. I miss waking up next to you every morning. I need you just the same way you needed me. I guess that's why we were a good pair.
I don't understand what happened, and I never will. Why did you loose weight? Were you really upsett over the dog, or were you upsett with me? The dog will never replace you. NEVER. No one can take your place. I would still do anything to have you back. I wish we had been quicker in trying to figure things out, or that anything that was suggested had worked. I am so sorry that nothing did. I wish things had ended differently. I know you held on just for me. I know you stuck out what ever pain you were in for another pet, or another snuggle. I am glad in some ways that i was not there when you took your last breath. I wish i could have told you that I loved you again and gave you one more kiss though. I just wish I could have changed things. You were there for me through everything in life, and it feels like I let you down. I really do feel like i let you down. I didn't do enough, I wasn't there for you when you needed me the most. I am glad that you finished your life with a good meal and a long purr, I just wish it had been for me.
You will always be the love of my life, no matter where you are you will always be with me. Your memory will give me strenght, and comfort when I need it. the same way you did in your short life. 8 years seems like it was not nearly long enough.
I will see you on the other side my love. We will spend our eternity together.

A letter to Skye

2011-01-27T13:22:24Z

Hi pretty girl, hows it going? the last two weeks have been hard but Im doing okay. I have finally forgiven myself for letting you go. I knew that you forgave me right away but it took me a while to forgive myself. I love you sis, you are not with me anymore but will always be in my heart. You will always be my golden dog. I love you, Goodbye

A letter to Alaska Sky

2011-01-26T10:10:25Z

It astounds me how many lives you touched when you were by my side. The folks at hospital send their love. Mom and Sandy wish that you were back with me again. The last few days have been long. They worry about me, but I assure them that you are with me still. You will be forever.
Remember this picture? It had poured the last three days, and you just wanted to get outside again. I let you out and ran some errands for just a little bit. When I got back, I looked outside and saw you romping in the mud. Oh gosh, you were covered from nose to tail tip. I couldn't be mad, because you looked so happy. You know me, always having a camera handy, I had to snap a couple of pictures. The first one I took, you looked like you were about to get in trouble. Yet, as the camera clicked you realized that you were on stage. You loved the attention of the camera, and I loved photographing you.
I brought a black and white shot into the group, and they fell in love instantly. You have that ability. The ability to captivate and hold hearts. Your love for kisses and everyone's lack of objection from taking them was inspiring. How did you do that so easily, love? I mean these were people who frowned on puppy kisses, and yet they would let you cover them. Like I said, you just have that ability.
I know as time passes the pain will get a little easier to deal with. It will not happen over night. I believe that I will carry this pain for a long time. On the other hand, I can feel your spirit with me still.I know you are next to me every moment and in my lap licking the tears from my face. I love you, my beautiful Alaska Sky. Let's go play in the mud again.
Also, Chance says he misses and loves you. He is lonely without his playmate.

A letter to Alaska Sky

2011-01-24T15:35:49Z

The light escaped your eyes Saturday. The choice I made was not easy, and will pain me forever on. I know it was for the best. You were in tremendous pain, and the surgery would have continued the agony with the chance of survival minimal. I had never been through that process before, and I hope to never do it again. To see the life flee from your physical form was difficult, but I know you are not in pain anymore. The fact that your heart would not stop beating let me know that your love was fighting to stay with me. I appreciate that my love. You will always be with me.
Do you remember the car ride home from your birth mom’s house? I won’t forget it. You sat calmly in the passenger seat with your head toward me. The brindle spot on your right eye gave you the expression of curiosity. The excitement of travel was gleaming in your eyes, but it pained you to leave your mother. I fully understand that feeling. Yet, you, Chance and I had each other, and I believe that helped the transition.
Your ability to learn quickly was amazing, and I was not surprise to find that your quick learning would lead to a strong bond between us. You were always there when I need you. You were there when I needed someone to love on, or someone to whisper a secret to. When I would wake up in the night I knew I could roll over and hold you. That helped me fall back to sleep, forgetting the nightmare that just happened.
The summer was great. Between the walks in the subdivision and our swims in Stones River, we shared a lot of moments. I felt better after our excursions. Chance is a great dog, but he and I can’t share the experiences that you and I did. That strengthened our bond even more. Those swims were great. The fact that you would follow me out into the deep waters, and just hang on me, made me feel as strong as a god. That idea that you needed me was my strength. No matter where I went you would always follow.
When the vet called me Saturday I know that our time had come to an end. Sandy was there for support, and that meant so much to me. Unfortunately, the task was still going to happen. As we sat on the floor in that small room, I could feel your love. That love that told me to be strong, but I couldn’t stop crying. The sedative had taking affect and you lay peacefully next to me. When the vet came to give the final shot, I whispered something into your ear. I hope you will remember what I said. That was our last secret. When the lady injected the fatal shot in your IV, I had my hand on your neck and could feel every breath and heartbeat you took. Your breath gave out first, but your heart kept beating. I know that was your sign to me that your love for me would never die. The lady had to administer one more lethal injection, and your heart stopped. You had left your body, but had not left my heart.
I have had many companions in my life. Tonto, Rebel and Shasta to name a few, but losing you has caused me the most pain. I guess because I feel responsible for your death mostly, but I know you forgave me. That idea means a lot to me, baby.
I will continue to hold you in my heart for the rest of my life. Know that your love was not lost on this man. I am better for knowing your love. I don’t know if there is
anything past death, but if there is please wait for me. I want to go for another swim with you.

A letter to Patches

2011-01-24T12:55:54Z

My dear Patches. It has been over a year now that you left us. A day doesn't go by that I don't think about you. Jack still talks about you all the time. He calls you our angel. It hasn't been the same with out you that's for sure. Buddy and Duchess got a new brother a few months ago, Sunny. He is a good boy and has become Duchess' new best friend. Maggie isn't doing very well, and she maybe joining you on the other side soon. It has gotten me thinking about the two of you together. She didn't like you at first but quickly the two of you would would become partners in crime. Maggie is a good dog and I pray for her everyday as I know it is going to be hard for all of us to say good bye to her. They two of you will be able to go off and explore together again soon. I miss you very much little girl. You were taken from me way to soon and I wasn't ready to let you go. Buddy is doing extremely well and Duchess is our star. Still when she sees another Boston Terrier she gets a little excited since she no longer has here little buddy and crate mate. I love you Patches! You will never be forgotten.

A letter to Skye

2011-01-20T09:57:12Z

Hey there pretty girl. How's it going up in heaven?
I got thinking last night about are wagon. Do you remember it? Of course you do how could you forget. We had some great adventures with that wagon. Do you remember how I bought you a harness and then hooked you up to the wagon? We would parade around the camp with you pulling the wagon and Keyko proudly sitting in it. And sometimes we even gave the little kids at camp ''dog drawn wagon rides" those little kids just loved sitting in that wagon holding keyko in their lap as you happily pulled them around. Then there was the time when I filled up the wagon with little creatures that we found in the tidepools at the beach and we put on the ''zoo''. You were the lion-dog, being the golden colour you were.
We had a lot of good times with that wagon and I promise to take care of it forever

A letter to Skye

2011-01-20T09:57:10Z

A letter to Skye

2011-01-19T19:24:45Z

This marks 4 days since you have been gone and I really miss you. I love you a lot and am glad that you lived a full long life. Keyko misses you a lot and when not occupied with toys or food tries to find you. When not looking for you she just sleeps in her kennel or mopes around the house. Tayko misses you in her feline ways and mum also really misses you. I find nights the hardest as I feel bad for leaving you on the floor of that veterinary office even though I know it was best for you. It's really weird not having you around. Have fun up in heaven with your kitty friends that left before you. I love you.

A letter to Malimutt

2011-01-12T09:07:29Z

Hey there Big Girl,
Well, it has been exactly 1 week since you left us. This week has been very surreal, and, honestly, I think you would have been really confused had you witnessed it with your own eyes. You, who loved and relied on schedules and continuity, well, this week would have gotten you a little uptight to say the least :)
We decided to not tell the boys that morning, and wait until the afternoon, because neither Todd nor I wanted them see you that morning… we wanted them to remember you as you were- happy, sloppy wet kisses and tail wagging. Logan really took the news hard, he did not want to believe it, and cried for a long time; he even left us to go to his room for a while. Hayden’s reaction was “but she likes to give me kisses!”, and even he cried (see – you were right, there is a lot of love in that kiddo ;-D) . Logan asked us if we could visit you on your birthday and bring you flowers and peeps, “like we do for your friend, momma”- that one made me start to cry all over again; he really wants to make sure you know that he is going to miss you.
Todd misses you so much—we both had such a hard time on Thursday morning, as I left and said “Have a great Day” he started to say “I already HAVE a great Dane” (as he has every day for the past 9 years) and we both just stopped and stared at each other realizing that little joke had run its course :(
And now Peanut- well – she is just out of sorts. (She is actually BEHAVING herself lol). She finally went back to your room and slept in your blanket on Sunday, but wouldn’t go near it at all before that. We started feeding her in the room, since she doesn’t slobber and make a mess like you always did ;). She pretty much keeps by our side all day log now, and its starting to freak Todd out. She has decided to latch on to him more than ever now that your not there for her. Maybe it will be good for them, they may start to like each other - I figure that’s what you would have liked anyway.
So there you have it—its taken me a week to write this because its taken me that long to accept that you are really gone. It has sunk in, and I accept that I will not have your happy “clicking” nails on the floor, or your wet nose in my face at 4 am asking to be let outside, or your very rare loud bark ringing out in the house ever again. We are doing well- and I know that is what will make you happiest. We will never replace you—as you were one of a kind. We may get another dog in a few years, but we know we will never again have our “big girl.”
I love you!

A letter to Chrissy

2010-12-29T18:46:41Z

I really can't believe you're gone. I still drive home from work and think about where we're going to go for a walk and how happy you'll be to see me only to come to an empty house. You were my closest friend for 15 years, kept all of my secrets, were there by my side, concerned, every time I cried, and made me laugh every day. You were so strong and fought all the way to end, but when you didn't want to eat your favorite food (bread) on that last day, we knew it was time to say goodbye. Although the needle pinched for a moment, you are eternally pain-free. You are in a better place now, Chrisser Bear. You may have all the delicious bones and chicken that you were allergic to here. You may chase as many small furry animals as you'd like without fences or leashes. You may sleep contently and soundly (and surely snoring!) in the warm sunshine. I think about you everyday, speak about you a lot, and although I appear strong and speak about you with a smile, I am struggling to get through an entire week without breaking down. It's been a very long two months since you've left this world and among the countless lessons you've taught me since I was five, I've learned that a dog-less existence is an insufferable existence. I'm thankful to you for teaching me the most important lesson, that dogs provide humans with an unconditional love that cannot be matched by any other animal. I'm also thankful that I had the opportunity to grow up with you. You were my new puppy whom I bragged about in kindergarten, my crazy, middle-aged dog who literally did eat my homework in high school, and my (still crazy) geriatric dog whom I brag about in my career. You were the best non-human sister one could ask for...I fondly remember the hot summer days as a child sharing popsicles with you on our back deck. Bear, you were our protector, our indestructible canine who survived many near-death experiences including many run ins with poisonous snakes, groundhogs, buzzards; the ingestion of 3 lbs of chocolate, an entire bottle of Advil, an entire rotisserie chicken (bones and all)-I though you'd be around forever. The good thing is you will be around forever in my memories. It is impossible to forget an unique and wonderful dog like you. Although it was not Christmas for me to not have any presents for you to open on that morning and a walk in the snow was not as fun without having you to catch a snowball with your mouth. You will live forever in my heart. I hope you know that you were loved immensely from very first day you arrived in a pickup truck as a small,shivering puppy to the very last day as a tired and gray-muzzled old lady, leaving this world in my arms. You're the best, I love you, I'll miss you!!!

A letter to Pippa & Prue

2010-12-29T08:44:09Z

My gorgeous girls, I miss you both so much. Although Prue you went first, the pain of losing both you and your sister so close together was and still is gut-wrenching. You both died in my arms. I hope you both knew that Mummy loved you very much and I hope you didn't feel alone at the time of your passing.
Pippa I still remember you on your back legs, front feet on my lap, trying ever so hard to be just that bit taller so you could see what was going on. Prue you were a wonderful guide dog for Pippa when her eyes failed her and always up for a cuddle and a tummy tickle. You were both so loyal and loving and will never be forgotten.
Rest easy girls.

A letter to Bailey

2010-12-16T12:29:35Z

Where to begin...I knew your time was approaching even though I didn't want to believe that you would one day soon be gone. Even as I write this letter I can't hardly imagine that just 2 days ago would be your last. You were such a special girl, my Bebe. You had the most loving and gentle soul. To see you wave (paw) at me from across the room, wanting nothing more than to be loved. You were always so quick to give kisses. Just thinking about it makes me smile. Remember all the countless times we shared snacks together and trips to the park. How you loved to run in the baseball fields when the sprinklers were going. What happiness and joy you brought to my life. It seems so short your 7 years with me. I am forever grateful for the time we did have. I know I will see you again my sweet girl. You are forever in my heart and on my mind. I love you now and I'll love you always.

A letter to Lil'Miss

2010-12-14T00:16:30Z

Just wanted to let you know we're thinking about you. Thoughts of you creep up on me and I get so upset. I know it's a normal reaction...you only passed on a few months ago...but I guess I am still working through your absence. Everyone misses you. You were such a lovely little spirit...always wanting to snuggle and make friends. I don't know where you learned how to tap folks on their shoulder when you wanted some rubs, but you sure did make an impression! I just wanted to say thank you. You know, you really were a part of my family. Not the family that I was born into, but the family that chose me as a member. Now, remember, we are counting on you to keep an eye on your brothers now that you've all taken up residence in the Kitty Dude Ranch in the Sky. We are sure Mellow and Sam saved you a pink cowboy hat with matching boots. We love you, Aspen. Take care.

A letter to Ginger

2010-12-08T21:42:16Z

My heart still hurts from the day I said goodbye. You were such a wonderful dog and when you were too sick to go on, we had to take you to the dr and lead to you the rainbow bridge. Your papa didn't want me to see you gone so I said my good bye before the vet took you away. I still hurt because I wanted to see you at rest, instead of you trying to get at us before you went to sleep.
You were a fighter to the very end. I hope the Lord lets us see the pets we loved so much when we all get to heaven. I want to tell you how awful it was to say good bye.

A letter to Bruiser

2010-12-08T19:52:00Z

It's been almost 12 years since I had to let you go, but I wanted to let you know that no matter how many years pass, you were and will always be one of the best friends I ever had. I miss your eyes and and I miss the way you used to smile when I scratched the spot right above your tail.
I miss the way you used to chew on all my blankets until there were holes in them and mom was furious that another comforter had gone to the dog. I miss the way you used to start at the end of the bed and slowly work your way up next to me and then scootch me over with your butt until you had the majority of the bed and I was safely nestled into the corner.
I miss the way you used to always come to my side when I was sad or upset and let me hold you and cry against you. I miss when I used to pat my shoulders how you would jump up and hug me. Even when you were getting up there in years and I would kneel in front of you, you would still give the best hugs.
I know I couldn't be there as much as I wanted to be towards the end, but I hope you know that the events going on in our family never changed how much I love you and it meant more to me than you will ever know that you fell asleep peacefully in my arms.
You were and will always be the most cherished memory in my childhood. Every memory from catching snowballs to standing in front of me and growling when people were play-fighting with me.
There will never be another Bruiser. Thank you for choosing my family and being a part of my life for 15 wonderful years.

A letter to Emma

2010-12-08T19:30:13Z

I remember when we found you. We were working at the renaissance fair. I was wearing a fancy dress that had antique lace that I had been warned to be careful with. But that went out the window when someone told me there was a little deaf puppy that needed a home. You were so sweet, even then. You climbed into my lap, and the feeling that you were right where you belonged was immediate. We took you home that night.
There were so many things you were afraid of. Afraid someone was going to take your food or toys away. Afraid that something bad was going to happen. But we were patient, and kind, and you blossomed. You stopped growling when we came near you while you were eating. You played nicely with your new 'brother' Logan.
Once you realized you were loved, you only wanted to love in return. Any new visitor was greeted with thousands of kisses and joy. You became everyone's best friend, and stole the hearts of all who met you.
You were two when you had your first seizure. We did everything we could, borrowed money from anyone we could, to try and get you the best care possible. But we couldn't stop the seizures. You were so understanding, even when we feared the worst. You would walk up, even in your post ichtal phase, and give us a kiss on the chin, as if to say "It'll be all right."
We tried so many medications, but they just didn't work. The night we lost you, just four nights ago, it seemed like you knew, and you were ready. We were out of options - and you told us it was your time. You even kissed the vet who laid you to rest. You went to sleep in our arms, surrounded by love and giving it back with your last breath.
I miss you terribly. I miss you following me everywhere. I still leave your spot on the bed with enough space to curl next to me. I miss your kisses, your soft ears. I even miss being woken up rediculously early in the morning by your insistant bark. I miss the little play barks, and the cuddles on the sofa. I miss watching you 'pudding' off the couch or bed. I miss the feel of your velvet soft ears. Visitors miss your bouncing, happy greetings. Logan misses his playmate.
You taught us so much about love and kindness. You taught us about forgiveness. Daddy and I are looking to volunteer at an animal shelter, so we can keep helping other dogs. You taught us that we had so much love to give, and it has such life-changing power. You taught us, and I hope others, that with love, all things are possible.
So many people had such kind words for you. So many people said you were lucky to have us. But I think we were luckier to have you. All of us who knew you were.
I hope you understand that we know we will never find another Emma. But in your memory, we will carry on helping as many dogs as we can. You taught us that. And we will never forget that - or you.
We love you, little Pudding, and we always will.

A letter to Hunu (WhoKnew)

2010-12-08T19:02:42Z

It is with great sadness that we let you go this week. What was first diagnosed as kennel cough ended as congestive heart failure. As we understand it, your disease grew fast and furiously over the course of the last month. Little could be done by the time your symptoms showed themselves.
Our time with you was way too short. That said, we had a wonderful life together full of adventures for the last year and a half – you enriching ours immeasurably and us enriching yours so that you got to bust out of a life of trauma to a much better one, we hope. Dora Sesler’s important work at Project Pet Rescue brought you to us and for that, we are grateful.
When we first laid eyes on you, we had no idea what you would bring to our lives,
*WhoKnew you’d be so cute?
*WhoKnew you’d be so unpredictable?
*WhoKnew you’d love to lie under our blankets at night and snore louder than Patty or me for that matter?
*WhoKnew you’d go too soon?
*And, WhoKnew it was possible to miss your sweet sleepy face so much?
In the afternoon of the day you died, we decided to put our holiday lights up in memory of the way you lit up our lives, our hearts, our hopes.

A letter to Tommy

2010-12-08T03:46:43Z

I can't believe you are gone...the feeling that you are still there is so strong that every time I arrive home I get the urge to run down to say hello to you and touch you and hug you. I miss all the beautiful expressions on your face, your soft fur, your beautiful pointy ears and your white paw. I keep finding your fur everywhere and every time it's like a punch in the stomach. I saved your collar, the one that felt so warm every time I took it off you after going for walks. It's right there next to your puppy pic on my nightstand. We all miss you every day Tommy...you were the best thing that ever happened to us, the most amazing and loving dog in the entire world. I will never ever forget you and I truly hope to see you again one day. Take care of Grampa like you did when he was still with us. I always remember you walking slowly with him when he got old...it was amazing.
I miss you so much....

A letter to Missy Nala

2010-11-16T15:53:56Z

i'm so sorry i couldn't spend more time with you in the last months of your life. it was so hard not being able to see you everyday. i wish i could've came and gotten you but with everything going on it was impossible. i just want you to know how much you mean to me. i think about you all the time and all the joy you brought me. you truly were my best friend. i always knew seeing your little face would make me feel better. i know you're in a better place now (with billybob too!). it's better that i wasn't there at the time of your passing because i don't think i would've handled it well at all. it still hurts and a part of me still hopes i'll find you waiting for me at the door but i find comfort in knowing you lived a long happy life. i miss you so much and i know master bates misses you too! i'll always love and cherish the special memories you filled my life with! my bratty lil missy nals. i love you and will remember you always!

A letter to Rusty

2010-10-31T11:01:01Z

I miss you so much! It has been only 2 days without you and the house is so lonely. I wish I knew that you were really sick before it was too late. Nobody knew that you had cronic kidney failure until it was too late. It is just not fair since you were only 5 years old. According to the doctor, you must have been sick for a long time and even born with it.
Just yesterday, Daddy went out to the garage to get pellets for the stove and he stopped dead because he thought he saw you lying in the corner next to the futon. We both miss you so much. Ziggy has been a wonder help though. Our first night without you, he slept in bed with us, in your spot, and stayed there until we feel asleep. Our king size bed seems so empty without you.
Daddy is off doing snowmobile trail work this morning and this was my first time alone without you. I miss you following me from room to room even if it just for a second. I missed you laying in my craft room helping me pick out fabric for the next quilt I am making. It is a sunny but breezy day today. You should see how much sun is coming in through the sliding glass door today. I miss seeing your laying there.
This week, I am going to go through my pictures and get them printed so that I can finish your scrapbook. The last picture I have in there was from your 3rd birthday when you were eating unfrosted yellow cupcakes. I think I will also make some birthday cupcakes this week. I know you were too sick to have them for your birthday last Monday so Daddy and I will remember you while we have them.
I hope you found your big brother Brandy in heaven. I miss him too! Now you are both up there watching over us. Are there plenty of frisbees in heaven? I know how much you loved playing. You would play for hours if we had the time. You always made me so happy when you would catch it up in the air. Remember the time you pooped in your frisbee and freaked out because it was in there. Daddy had to come over and dump it out so you could continue playing. You are too funny!
Daddy and I will be getting a new puppy when we get back from Disney in three weeks. Please help guide us to pick out a new friend to share our home and life with. We are not trying to replace you it is just that we miss someone greeting us when we come home. Someone to share popcorn and ice cream with. You will always be remembered! I love you Rusty Buckets!

A letter to Daisy

2010-10-22T17:15:38Z

It's been five long years since you've left my side. Tears still swell my eyes. You were my first little love, you were my Princess and my Guardian. I remember how you used to snuggle next to me after every break up and how you wouldn't leave my side for days when I was sick in bed. I miss coming home to the sounds of your protective bark. No one will ever be able to replace you in my heart. I remember the day mama and daddy took us to your house so we could pick you out. I remember how you just jumped into my lap and I knew you were the one for our family. Every shoe you ever ate has long since been forgotten, ever little accident on the floor has long since been cleaned, and every hole dug in the yard has been filled with time and weather, but the hole left in my heart, your paw print can only fill. As time moves on my memories of you do not fade or stray away, but however they do in fact grow stronger with each passing day. No matter how many days are between the living and the dead I can rejoice in the fact that knowing one day we'll be together again leaves me with a smile on my face, but the hole shall remain until the day I hear your sweet bark once more.
My dearest Daisy oh how I miss you. Please watch over Grandma she loved you the best, but not as much and your mommy did.

A letter to Sugar

2010-10-22T15:11:39Z

Its been about a month since you left and I miss you and think of you often. I know in my heart that it was time for you to leave this place as you had grown so tired and weak in your body. I hope that you are with Ghost and Doc and waiting for the rest of us to be back together again someday. There are so many things that make me think of you. It seems so funny to sit down to eat and you not be right by my side waiting for me give you a bite of "sumpting to eat". To be here with only the danes and not have your furry little humor to compare to them at times seems almost surreal. I think back to when you were just a baby and it was just the 2 of us and how sweet you have always were. You were always so much smarter than the rest of the dogs, even when you got on in age and couldn't remember the things you had previously figured out, you re-figured them again. I miss you my girl, you brought so much to my life. I love you.

A letter to Tonto

2010-10-22T10:15:12Z

We had Pizza last night and that always brings you to me with a little smile and then the tears. The way you would set in front of me with the drewl hanging from the corners of your mouth. you always knew that if you sayed that way long enough I would give in and you would get all the crust from the Pizza. I will never know if I did the right thing in having you put to sleep. I just didn't think it was right to keep you doped up on pills to stop the pain and to watch you stumble and trip at 110lbs I know you hurt. I take heart in knowing that you are in heaven and we will be together again. You stayed by my side when I needed someone the most. The 11 months that Dustin was in Iraq you were there to lesson when I needed to talk or cry when it really got hard I actually think you knew what was going on. And everytime Dustin would call you wanted to hear his voice on the phone. Remember when I would bring a puppy home I never had to potty train them you did that for me. You would show them the doggie door and how to use it and that they had to go behind the tree so no one could watch. Penny is doing good she is 10 now and not moving around much. I am afraid that her time wont be much longer here with me. It is funning when I got you you were a mistake that a reg. English bulldog made by breeding with a Lab. Now they call that a Bullador. that seems like such a HARD name for the most loving caring and friendliest dog that I ever had. I hope you want mind if one day I try to find one that looks like you. It has been 4 years now and it still feels like you will walk around the corner any minute. GOD how I miss you. You were my best friend my family and I love you so much. When it is my time to come meet you they are going to put your ashes with me. I hope you don't mind that I just couldn't put them ijn the ground. I wanted them with me until we are together again. Run strong Tonto and enjoy the clouds . I will bring you a pizza when I come. And Thank you for 14 years of Love. I Miss you.

A letter to Kiki

2010-10-20T16:00:12Z

Hi sweety! I miss you baby. I hope your having lots of fun in Heaven with all of your new friends. I will meet you up in Heaven soon. I can't wait to see you again. I miss hugging you and kissing you and sleeping with you in my arms. You are the sweetest dog in the world. I wish you had more time on this earth with me but I am thankful for the 8 years we did have together. I am glad that I always treated you like the princess that you are. Everyone in the family misses you very much. I know you probably miss us too but we will all be together soon. You have the sweetest face in the world so I"m sure you'll find love in heaven. Since you left us the house has felt so empty. We didn't realize how much happiness we felt because of you. Now the house and my heart feels like its missing a big part of it. I placed your ashes in my room where you slept with me. I also drew a picture of you to place over it. I kept the towel I dried you with and a pamper of yours you never used. I love you, miss you and you have taken a big part of my heart with you. You are always in my thoughts and prayers. MuAH!

A letter to Zoie

2010-10-19T20:41:10Z

You were my angel and best friend! I still can't believe you're gone, and even now I cry over losing you. You were so funny, and I would give anything to see you steal another kitten to raise as your own right now! You were perfect to me, even if you were the "ugliest puppy in the litter" to everyone else! You grew to prove them wrong though didn't you babygirl?! I still smile when I think of the way kids would gravitate to you and parents would be shocked that a Pit Bull could love SO much! I miss feeling your head on my shoulder as I drove you around in your car, and I can't help but laugh everytime I turn on the AC thinking of how you would hog the vents! You were a shining example of a misunderstood breed, and changed so many people's minds. I can't thank you enough for that! People still ask about you, then cry when I tell them you're gone. It's amazing how many lives you touched, and I didn't realize it until after I lost you. At only two, you deserved many more years to chase your tail and steal food, but God knows his plans, and I guess he just needed a little brindle angel, and since you were my angel, you were perfect for the job! Please know not a day goes by that you don't cross my mind, and I know many years from now, you'll still be in some of the happiest memories of my life. You inspired me to start the rescue we have now, and every dog I save, I save in your name! You may not have had a litter to live on through, but you live on through the dogs we fight to save everyday! Thank you for showing me that no dog is worthless because of their breed, and thank you for all the minds you changed. I wish you were here now to see all the lives you touched, but I know you are looking down proud as can be! You'll never really know what you meant to me ZoieBear, and you'll never know just how bad I miss you, but I look forward to meeting you at the bridge to tell you just how much good you did. Thank you for loving me through the good and the bad. You never failed me, even when people did. Thank you for being the best friend a girl could ever have! I love you ZoieBear, and miss you everyday! Daddy and Dizzie miss you too. I still catch Daddy looking at your pictures and fighting back tears. You changed his life too. Dizzie still runs to us when we say your name, like she's expecting you to walk in the room at any second! Your "step-puppy" Jozie is doing great, and sometimes I swear she's more like you than your own puppy could have ever been! She makes me proud just like you do! Until we meet again, know that you are deeply loved and forever missed.

A letter to Butter

2010-10-19T19:44:58Z

It has been two months from today that I had to say goodbye to you. You were only 5-years-old. You didn't deserve to die. You were the love of my life, my companion, my friend, my baby. I miss falling asleep with you in my arms and waking up to you by my side. I'm sorry that the even the strongest medicine, best vets, and all of the love in world couldn't make you better. I have been miserable without you. I feel empty somehow. I hope you are making lots of friends in heaven. I hope you will wait for me. One day I will join you and nothing will part us ever again. I think of you everyday and ask God to give you a kiss and a hug from me every night. No one will ever replace you. You were, are, and will always be the love of my life.

A letter to Tamaiijja

2010-10-19T19:05:52Z

I can't believe that you have been gone over a year already. I miss you so much. You were the sweetest dog I have ever known. After all you went through the first year of your life..being chained out in someone's backyard with no shelter then breaking free only to be hit by a car and lose a leg. After you became a part of our family you went on to become a Canine Good Citizen and registered therapy dog. The kids you visited and helped to read...the people in the hospital and those undergoing chemo treatments...you brightened their days with your sweet face and wagging tail. I miss your head resting on my lap...your nose nudging me to keep petting you and that husky howl when you wanted to play ball in the snow! All your brothers and sisters miss you very much too....you would have loved playing with your new brother Gunner...he is a goofy hound that I think you sent our way.

The five years I had with you surely were not enough...cancer is an evil disease that you fought bravely and with dignity. Making the decision to let you go to the Rainbow Bridge was so hard and I cry often when I see your picture or think of you...I hope that you are running free with Sandy, Bailey, Skeeter, Winnie and the rest of your family. Please look out for Murray as he has a sick heart and will not be with us too much longer....watch for him and show him the way...

You were such a beautiful dog...such a sweet soul and though the time I had with you was way too short it was such a blessing having you in my life. Knowing that you are waiting for me at the Rainbow Bridge helps me get through the days. Hopefully I made your life half as wonderful as you made mine...I miss you everyday and love you so much MiMae!!!

A letter to Spooky (Spook) Mulder Riggio

2010-10-19T14:20:18Z

To my Spook,
Mommy misses you so much...I think of you all the time. I miss you taking away all the bad things when I walked in the door. I miss you making me smile when I didn't think it was possible. I miss people looking at you and being in awe of your beauty, inside and out. I miss you being the best foot warmer in the world. I've had a real hard time since you've been gone...
I love you so much and I always will. I'm a better person by having such a wonderful creature to grace my life. Thank you for everything.

A letter to Windsor

2010-10-11T22:10:30Z

Today marks four months since we said goodbye to you. I love and miss you so much, baby. I hope you know how hard a decision it was to let you go, but I knew it was what would be best for you. Nine years did not feel like enough time knowing you, but I don't think even forever would have been long enough.

You always knew how to make me laugh, especially when I didn't think I could. Whether it was grabbing a toy and making me play with you or simply laying next to me with your head in my lap, you were always the one to make me smile. I still come home sometimes and expect to see you standing in the doorway, whole body wiggling in excitement and a toy in your mouth. Even when your arthritis got the best of you in your final days, you still wanted to play.

You taught me so much too, big guy. You never held a grudge against people, even though you were abandoned at that shelter. You loved everyone you met, regardless of who they were or what they looked like. You never let anything bother you, even when the pain was too much, which you faced with a quiet dignity. I never saw such joy until I got my license and I could take you for car rides. Even when you couldn't stand up anymore, you'd still lie right by the door, nose outside the window and barking at any dog or motorcycle we drove past.

Thank you for sending us Madden. I know that was all you, buddy. Dolly, Tobey and I were missing you so much, and while of course we still do, sending this rambunctious pup to us has helped ease the pain a bit. I was heartbroken and having a difficult time until you sent her. She's given new life to Dolly and Tobey. You're still changing lives, big guy. In life, you helped show people that shelter dogs are wonderful family members and in passing, you have given a new life and chance to another dog. I call her my "Pocket Winnie" because she reminds me so much of you.

I'll always remember your last day with me. You curled up right next to me on your dog bed and we just laid there, while I sobbed into your coat. I knew you knew something was wrong, but as usual, you wanted to make sure I was okay. You always did take care of me. You were almost fourteen years old, but I wanted you to live forever. You knew better though. You always did.

I keep trying to write an essay about you, but I don't think I can properly pay tribute to you. I will keep trying and maybe someday I'll get it right. I hung your collar on my rearview mirror because of how much you loved car rides and I try and take the long way home because you loved that. It's the simple things that matter, you taught me that.

Without you, I would not be here; without you, there would be no Tobey or Madden. You brought so much joy and love to everyone who knew you. I miss you so much and even when the pain becomes too much sometimes, I know we made the right choice.

I love you, Winnie James.

A letter to Teddy

2010-10-05T21:26:47Z

I thought this concept was a bit weird, but what the hey. I miss you. And it feels sometimes like people aren't supposed to miss pets. But you were awesome. I guess the part that makes it hurt the most is that, when you were a pup, I was 5. We grew up together. And you knew me as a kid. It feels like everyone who knows me knows me know just knows this [removed]ty, odd, flawed adult version of me... you got to know me when I was happy with who I was. You represent a time I wish I could go back to. But when you died when I was 17, my childhood died along with you. The world we shared was awesome, and the world you left behind is lonley as all hell. I don't like being a grown up. You never let me down like people do. I love you. I think of you all the time. Espcially when I see another Schnauzer. I've never seen another as nice looking as you though. I don't know what to do Ted. I hope that you're at peace. You were the best dog anyone could ask for.

A letter to Oreo

2010-10-05T00:45:54Z

Hey buddy... it's been a long time. How ya doin' up there in heaven? I know... it's just "beautiful" and you're having a great time! I hope you welcomed Pushkin... and "Azreal" our cat into heaven and are showing them around. Ah... I'm sure you are. You came to the family as a surprise Christmas gift from a friend to the kids, Sharon and John... and you were a gift that never stopped giving. What a good puppy you were... and long time companion to the family? 17 years... Wow! But, as the kids grew and left the nest you remained to keep us company and for the last years of your life you were "Grandpa's sidekick"... as the picture shows. I always remember that you'd come out with me with the "big" telescope on some dark nights back in New Jersey and just when I was so engrossed in looking for some distant galaxy... you'd "slowly" try to slip away to go and visit your girlfriend down the block - a dog that looked a lot like your own mix - colors and all. Sometimes I'd catch you slipping away... and stop you and then, "honestly" sometimes... I'd smile and let you go and have some fun. Shhhhhhhhhh don't tell grandma or the kids. Then, you'd come home... a couple of hours later "exhausted" (Ha!), and you'd know that you were going to get a "shower" after a "night-on-the-town" (so to speak). And, with ears pinned back ('cause you thought I was angry), without me saying a word... you went upstairs into the bathroom, and right into the shower... waiting for what was coming. A nice shower to top off the day (or night as it were). Well, I didn't mind... since your "Oreo-cookie" coat white and black always looked so beautiful after a few mintues of scrubbing. The white part was like snow. For a mix.... you certainly put on a "good presentation" I have to say. VERY handsome! On some nights... even today, some 8 years later... when I'm out alone with the telescope in Tucson.... I look around in the quiet of the night.... and remember our telescope nights together. You were something all right. So cute, and always gentle with everyone in the family - and friends, barking as folks came into the house and again when they were going out... making your presence known - doing "dog duty" on guard... but pleasantly so, not an "angry" barker. No. You were a "good" barker. (There is such a big difference... huh?) We could count on you. Well, this letter is just to let you know that we're all still thinking about you - once in a while - and then often. It's a funny mix... how sometimes other triggers of life bring back a memory of you? We haven't gotten another dog yet. Who could replace you... though we wound up with Azreal "the cat" - thanks to John saying, "Take care of 'Oz' - I'll be back in three weeks!" That was several years ago, and now even Azreal is gone. Well, you're in-charge of those family pets that have gone since your leaving us. I'll see you at the telescope sometime. It's nice out there in the quiet of the night - flying among the stars. Do dog's have souls? I'll bet that they do - since they have feelings - right? You betcha! And, since God made you... I'm sure He took you back too - with wide open arms and a smile. I'll bet you think His arms feel a little like Grandpa's huh? But even better! Someday, we'll meet again... and why not? You know your way around the stars... and so do I. Remember, we're all heading towards M-13? Ha! Ha! Come-here... let me give ya a hug! There ya go! Ugggghh! A big one! Thanks for all the gentle loving. I know you always felt "safe" & loved while you were with us. Now, you're safe & loved with Jesus. And, that's the best combination - in life. Kisses up to Heaven from Grandpa. P.S. Give "Oz" and Pushkin a hug from us too! Thankx.

A letter to Snickers

2010-10-04T11:12:09Z

You came to me in a dream and laid on my chest looked at me
and without talking let me know what a great mom I had been and that
you didn't want me to me to sad anymore. It really felt like you were there with me. You had such a sense of peace and happiness to share with me that now I can look at your photos and be happy not sad and now I understand my happiness now still gives you happiness

A letter to Riley

2010-10-03T11:10:51Z

It has been a month and a half since you left us and a day hasn't gone by where we don't talk about you, smile or cry and just plain miss you. We had you for 13 years.....they were 13 years of pure love from you and I want to thank you for that. You loved me when others couldn't or wouldn't and I cherish you for that. Your brother, Wes, misses you too. He misses your nose nudges and paw swats.....things that made us both smile or laugh. I miss you especially at night when you would lay at my feet and keep me company. You were always there to offer your head for me to stroke or your whole body for me to hug. I don't know which one of us got more out of those acts of affection...you or me. I like to think it was mutual!
The bottom line is, I hope you know how very much we loved you. We all knew that the end was coming but we just didn't expect it to happen so quickly or unexpectedly. Our goodbyes were heartwrenching and leaving you was horrible. But we knew you were in pain and we had to do what was best for you.....we loved you too much to let you suffer. I know you are with Mack and Bozzie now and I hope you are having the time of your life.
Wes and I have talked about etting another dog but we aren't ready yet. Maybe in the Spring........But until then, I know you are watching us and loving us. I sometimes think I hear the clink of your collar and tags on the floor and I know it's you saying, "Hi, Mom"!
We love you and miss you terribly!!

A letter to Galadriel (Gally)

2010-09-23T14:19:10Z

I miss you very much you were a big part of our family. We treated you like my sibling and mom and dad treated you like their child. You were spoild rotten, but a wonderful family pet. Throughout my childhood years you were always there for me when I needed comforting and, although you never spoke, you always knew how to make me feel better. I know all our family misses you terribly even after 2 years and getting our new dog, Chelsea, hasn't replaced you in our hearts. I use to be able to hold up in movies when a dog passed, but ever since we lost you I've never been able to hold myself from shedding a waterfall of tears because I miss you so much. You've been my insparation for everything in school from writing to my artwork and you and Chelsea are still always on my mind. November 6, 2008 was one of the saddest day of my life. That morning dad told me to say goodbye to you since you might not return from your trip to the vets. That morning while you were outside before going to the vets something terribly wrong happened. I've never really gotten the whole story, but from what I remember you had a stroke. You survived untill you got to the vets and dad made the hardest decision of his life to euthanize you so you wouldn't be in anymore pain. When I came home from school my closest friend, and sister, in the whole world was gone. It was very rough for the family, dad secretly cried outside after dinner because he always took you out after dinner every night. He couldn't do that anymore though. We've held up pretty good over the years and Chelsea has helped. Although she's not you, we love her with all our hearts and care for her as well. She's aslo a spoild dog just like you were and goes for many walks during the day. Shes had some behavior issues lately and its been so hard that dad has said if we didn't end up with Chelsea, she probablly would have been ut down by now. If there's any way you can guide her to control herself, she needs the help. 2 whole years and we still think about you every day and i have many pictures around you around my room and i sleep with 4 sheltie stuffed animals everynight n when I'm having a hard time i cuddle up to one and ask you for help. You were a beautiful and smart dog so we all hope you are happy wherever you are and no pain is coming to you. We love and miss you so much, you were a wonderful family pet.
*Peace*Love*Happiness*

A letter to Zane

2010-09-21T18:25:18Z

You've been gone only a few hours and I already miss you terribly. I am struggling to comprehend how illness could have snatched you away so quickly. Not long ago you were a young and vibrant kitten, full of mischief and fun. Then FIP swooped in, the most dreaded of dread disease. My darling boy, how you fought to live. I am so eternally sorry that we couldn't do more to help you. Sweet, sweet little cat, in your year of life you brought us such joy. I am honored to have been your human mom. I don't know what the universe has in store for us after we die, but I do know that if there is any justice, any grace at all, you are reunited with your kitty mother; I know you always missed her. Little one, I am so glad you are out of pain. You will always have a piece of my heart.
All my love!

A letter to Ben

2010-09-15T16:47:37Z

It's been two years since we have lost you. Although you occasionally visit us and let us know you are still around I find it tough to accept you are no longer physically here to share your life with us. Just when I think I am coping it hits me like I've had the wind knocked out of me. I just want you to know I feel like I could have done more for you, but realistically I know that it was one hurt your Mummy couldn't fix. I am glad you waited for me on your final night, I wouldn't have forgiven myself otherwise. It was the hardest thing I have ever done to say to you that we would miss you and that if you felt you needed to go to just go. I wanted to be selfish and keep you forever. I was never disappointed in you, just angry with myself that I couldn't make the cancer go away. You are my little boy, and will always be my buddy to nap with and go in the car with. I hope you will stay with me in spirit at this time, I still need you. I've been told you have important work to do elsewhere and I am jealous and don't accept it but I will try to understand. You will continue to be a part of my life and I hope you will be watching and waiting for us to someday reunite. You made both Daddy and me happy and we shared a lot of love, comfort and laughs with you - sometimes at your expense. We still talk about you and the adventures we had: camping, your attempts at swimming, your favorite foods, your plushy fur, the naps we took, moodiness, how you hated the dark, and how we loved you and you loved us. It will never be the same without you.

A letter to Marley

2010-08-30T17:17:21Z

Your human mom, Lynn, spoke to me today and told me that you had passed peacefully earlier this week. That feeling of loss arose as she was talking, but if I had not had the pleasure of meeting you, I would have been less that I am today. Even though we met but once in your lovely yard, Lynn and I had consulted on several occasions about your old-age afflictions. I can sympathize with that, Marley, because I too am no longer the picture of youth!
However, I must say that you were a most handsome fellow! I bet you were quite the lady charmer when you were young, catting around with all the females. Lynn said that you had a good evening when groomed by your master the day before you left us. And he gave you a pep talk, I hear. Then you were so relaxed that you decided to nap under your favorite bush in the yard...so comfy in the love... you passed quickly.

I'm writing this remembrance to you to let Lynn know that you occupy a special place in my heart too, AND because I know that you will be very proud of yourself to have made such an impression on a non family member.

So rest in peace, my good man. You were loved and mingled with the souls of your human friends.

A letter to Grandma

2010-08-23T12:03:14Z

It's been 5 months and 13 days since you left us (but who's counting?). I still find the grief unbearable and overwhelming most of the time. I know you wouldn't want it that way. I do find some comfort in knowing you're in Heaven, always watching over us, inheriting the Kingdom which He promised, reuniting with Granny & Nancy and probably playing A LOT of poker! I'm finally to a point where I feel like working through my grief with a counselor. I think we're all getting there, now that the initial shock has worn off. It will take some time, but we will all be ok.

We love you so very much and miss you every second of everyday. Not a minute goes by that you're not in my thoughts.

I love you!!

A letter to Shadow

2010-08-22T08:13:45Z

It has been about three months since you passed over the rainbow bridge, but I see you every day in my heart. Eighteen years together is not small for a cat that had been abandoned as a yearling and arrived on our deck with a horrible racking respiratory infection. It was touch and go for about a month, wasn't it? But I guess you felt our love and knew that if you could just get well, we would care for you forever! Funny thing is that your voice never came back to its normal robust volume and for the rest of your life, when you tried to "meow", you just "squeaked". I'm smiling because this was very endearing.

You were a very solidly built feline, like many of your cousins from England - short, stocky legs, muscular body and what we call a bull head, wide and masculine. I'm sorry that I was never able to enter you in the Household Pet category of a cat show because, in your prime, you would have won!

I miss that black paw snaking out as I pass to grab my hand and attention. It was your way of saying, "Hey, Here I am, how about a treat?" I always thought that there would be more days together; you left so suddenly. Funny thing was that the vet thought there was not a major problem and your bloodwork came back showing good health for an oldster. Dr. G. says that it must have been a blood clot that suddenly took you. I had left for work, but do you remember that Calvin cradled you in his arms when he found you on your side? You took a few more breaths and then slid away. I wish I had been there to whisper how I loved you and that you had to travel to the light now.
I'm sure that your old pals greeted you on the other side. Did Squealer say hi?

Anyway, Shadow, you were an easy cat - you never asked for much and always had a hug for anyone who picked you up. That should get you a high ranking as an Angel cat! Although I'm sorry your time with us ended in an instant, I'm glad you didn't linger and suffer. We miss you terribly and so does your old companion Jesse and even Bippy. Jesse wouldn't eat for a few days and is just fading in grief. I've tried to perk him up, but he won't hear it. So here is what I'm asking you, now that you are an Angel:

Come and comfort Jesse. If he really wants to go with you, then stay by his side while he makes the transition over the bridge, or maybe you can convince him to stay here awhile longer. Both of you came to us together eighteen years ago and he is just lost, even though Bippy is trying to comfort him. We will take care of Jesse, of course, but it is you he wants. Be with him.

I'm sure you know that I go to our little graveyard in the woods and say a prayer for all the Furries that spent some time on earth with us and now rest in peace. You have a place there, but more importantly, you are in my heart and soul. I wish you could enjoy the screened in patio with us this summer, but I bet you are trotting all over the yard, chasing chipmunks!

Well, I'm going to close for now, Shadow, Please give a spirit visit to your old pal, Jesse, as soon as you get this message. You're great!

A letter to Cricket

2010-08-10T17:08:09Z

Happy Birthday Pal!!!!!
It has been almost two months since you left me behind for that open field in the sky. I still miss you very much. Not a day goes by that I don't think about you. I even say goodnight to you every night. I still feel like a part of me went with you that day.
I wonder every once and awhile if you accepted Buddy into our extended family, because you knew he would help to mend our broken hearts. He has picked up on a lot of stuff too that you used to do. It makes me wonder when I see it , if you are whispering something in his ear. I think maybe you are trying to tell us that a part of you will always be with us.
We put a head stone on your grave. That way people would know how special you are. If you are around Spicey, Pepper, Misty, Kristy,Brandy, Muffin, and Molly. Tell them that there is a headstone for them too. Also tell them that their human Mommy loves and Misses them too.
I start back to work soon. It will be even harder to come home now and not have you there to greet me. You always knew just what I needed when I got home.
I am sorry that I was not there at the vets on that day. I really wanted to. I even tried to say good bye and I love you. But other people told me not to. They said it was better for me. I knew it wasn't. They got to say good bye to you, the last thing I said was love you Crickie as they took you away.
I don't know if you can see it or not. I ordered 2 necklaces to help me cope. One is a paw print with a bone, the other is a heart. The heart say "Always in my heart" which is where you will be. You may have seen two other dogs hanging out with some of my other dogs. Their are apart of our extended dog family. The neighbors next door to us had a golden retriver, and a mutt. Those dogs are good dogs too.
In my heart I believe that you are waiting in the field for the day when you can see me again. I hope you are happy and have lots of friends to play with. I also hope that you still get a chance to see a deer go by. I know how much you love to do that.
I haven't seen your friend Daisy at all this summer. I am almost afraid to go over there and find out. I am scared to find out that something happened to her. If something did and she is up there with you. Tell her Hi from me.
I will always love You Cricket. You helped me through alot. I just wish I could of helped you sooner. Then maybe you would be here right now laying at my feet as I type on the computer.

A letter to Ruby

2010-08-07T12:03:03Z

It's been a little over a month since you've been gone, and I still can't believe it. Letting you go that day was the hardest thing Mommy and Daddy ever had to do. But, you were struggling each day, even though you acted like a trooper. We know in our hearts that you were ready to go.
I remember so vividly the day you came into our lives. Daddy saw your face come around the corner at work on the pet adoption day and immediately fell in love with you. He called me and told me I had to come to see you because we needed to have you. So I came to see you and brought Buzia to meet you, and headed straight to the shelter to adopt you.
Although I at first had my doubts about adopting a second dog, you added so much joy to our lives. You loved going for walks and got so excited when we got your leash out. You would do this silly dance up and down the hall, because you couldn't contain yourself. You loved treats and getting them out of your Kong bone. You would look at us and puff out your cheeks, and when we said you looked like a frog, you'd bark at us. When a bus would drive down the street, you'd bark at it. You loved spending time outside.
I always felt there was a sadness in you, though. And it seemed to me that you were still looking for something. And it was obvious that you were poorly socialized as a puppy or traumatized somehow. You were so afraid of storms and would curl up in the corner of our bedroom, shaking. I would feel so sad that I couldn't comfort you. I often wondered what your previous owners did to you and why and how they really brought you to the shelter.
But I'm so glad they did! It was such a gift to be your Mommy and Daddy. It was the most important thing in the world to us. Taking care of you and loving you and your sisters and brother was our biggest joy.
Toward the end of your life, you had special needs that required extra effort on our parts, but we want you to know that we were never mad at you for anything. When we seemed upset, it was just because we were tired, but not upset with you. Even with all your challenges, you still were such a sweet girl. You kept on going, and insisted on going for walks, even though they weren't very long or far anymore.
We hope you know we tried to give you the best life possible, and everything we did, we did because we loved you. We miss you so much and still see you everywhere -- in your bed, helping us get ready in morning like you did, in the doorway when we come home, walking around the yard.
We pray that you're truly in a better place where you're happy and pain-free. And that you found whatever it was that I felt you were always looking for. Spending seven years with you was so wonderful, and too short of a time. Having that last day together was beautiful. Sending you on your journey to your next place was so hard for us, yet we were so happy we were able to do it in such a peaceful, calm way in our home. We believe that we will see you again some day, when our souls will be reunited.
I'm sure you know that your little sister, Mila, is very ill. She will be joining you in a couple of days. It is extremely hard for us to have to let her go so soon after we let you go, but at least we know that the two of you will now be together. We think she misses you so much, that she decided she wants to follow you. Please be looking for her as she passes from us to you. Take care of each other and wait for us together.
We all miss you and will love you forever. You will always be in our hearts.

A letter to Buford

2010-08-03T16:06:01Z

It broke my heart today to put you to sleep. I wish there was some other way. When you bit my hand on Sunday with such force it scared and devastated me. I realized then so viscerally what I think I always knew but could not admit -- that you were not happy and had not been happy for a long time. I know that you wanted a certain kind of happiness that your papa and I couldn’t give to you. I know too that you had something emotionally going on inside you that made you frustrated at times, happy at times and forlorn at times. It wasn’t anything that you did or didn’t do or that we did or didn’t do. It just was. It killed your papa and I that we couldn’t figure out what to do to make you happy and give us peace in our home the way we needed it. We pray you have found your joy, your happiness and your peace in heaven.

This morning when papa let you outside, I saw you sitting on the rug, looking at the morning sun hit the trees and breathing in the cold fresh air. I came outside and sat next to you. We watched the beauty of the sun and the outdoors in the quiet silence. Somewhere in that quiet stillness there was peace. A peace emerging from the beauty that existed in the present. I felt you tell me that what was going to happen was all right because you already had the gift of the peace of that moment. It was a peace that many humans search years for but you were always able to find in our little back yard. It is why you rarely jumped the wall, because you found what you needed within the safety and beauty of our garden. Thank you for teaching me the value of stillness, solitude, cherishing the outdoors and not taking for granted the beauty in my surroundings, even in a little back yard.
You were shaking in my arms before the vet came in and your papa and I tried to calm you through our tears. You were so brave and gentle in facing this, like the true Alpha cat that you always knew you were but never got the chance to be. We wanted to be there to give you our comforting smells, voices and crying faces that would be the last images and thoughts you would take from this life. I know I heard you purr right before you died and it comforted me to hear the sound you make when you are most relaxed and happy.
Thank you for all the wonderful memories of: bending your head low for a head pet, chewing on my finger on the left side of your mouth, plopping into my arm crook for a cuddle, sitting for hours in your spot under the cape honeysuckle bush to escape the summer heat and look for bugs, wanting to share the lizards, birds and rats you caught with us, your dear high pitched meow that sounded like you were saying “milk” and your low pitched meow that sounded like “wow,” loving to play with stick toys and the hanging creature toy in our bedroom, your drowsy eyes when you would wait on the counter for Friskies, knowing how to sneak outside without us seeing you, being the toughest guy and the fraidiest kitty all at the same time, and always coming to me with a meow when I called you “Buford honey.”
Your papa and I will miss you my dear little boy. You were my baby, my forlorn one, my rat catcher, my one and only Buford honey.
We will always love you, dear Buford.

A letter to Brutus

2010-07-30T19:52:58Z

Oh Brutus (Brutie Boy, as Lydia always called you) It's been a week since you left us so suddenly, and never could we have imagined what a huge hole you would leave behind. We miss you so much, the sound of your paws on the porch, seeing you laying in the big hole you dug under the swing, running to greet us everytime we got home.
Lydia is having a hard time understanding why you're not here anymore. You were her best friend, she seems so lost without you. She won't go out to play because you're not there. She just wants to read you stories in her tent and hug your big furry neck. She always called you her protector and she misses you so much that it's painful to watch.
She is so worried that you are afraid where you are now, but I told her that you are happy playing with other dogs and that you are with your Daddy again.
I can't believe it's been 11 1/2 years since you were born in our kitchen. We chose to keep you out of a litter of eight because you stole our hearts almost instantly. You were such a contradiction, shoving everyone else out of the way to eat, like a big brute (how you got your name) but then hiding between my feet like you were terrified when we took you outside to play in the snow.
We found a nice spot for you to rest in and tomorrow Lydia and I are going to decorate a special stone for you. We found it the morning we went looking for you and Lydia insisted we bring it home, it just seems fitting that we use it to help remember you.
Even as I write this I can't hold back the tears, I just want to rub your furry neck and, yes, I even miss you drooling on my feet.
I hope you knew how much you were loved. We miss you and we'll never forget you. I hope you're happy wherever you are my big Brute.
You'll always have a very special place in our hearts.

A letter to Beloved Bear

2010-07-29T15:05:28Z

It's been only a few days since you left this world so the hurt is still very fresh. I still can't believe you are no longer going to be part of my cancer healing and life. I'm still in shock. I can't really look at pictures of you just yet but you're always on my mind, every minute of the day.

I'm finding so many every day things difficult which I did not expect. Going to sleep is hard, all I do is think of you. What could I have done to prevent what happened to you. Why did it happen. Why you. Why now. What did I do to deserve this. Why more [removed]. The ultimate what the f*@k.

Waking up is just as worse. I miss letting you out of your crate, tail wagging against it. (thump, thump, thump) Then you go beserk with your toy, wanting to play first thing in the morning. I miss you following me from kitchen to living room to the bedroom while I get ready. Giving me the look of hope if you get to come to work with me. Our morning walks. Our morning cuddles. I still look in the tub to see if you've peed in it.

I can't even make a soy smoothie yet because I used to give you a little. You and your little soy shake beard.

I hate coming home. I miss you jumping on me. Then you would nudge me with your toy, you are ever so keen to play. No one stares at me anymore when I eat. As I sit here, sometimes I think you will still pop out from under the couch to play or hear you make funny noises when you're dreaming.

My car is not the same with you riding in it, crying at me to take your seatbelt off once you knew we were near work. How on earth do you know which exit it is?

My work friends miss you too. It dawned on me that they've known you for 5 years of your life! So many people said that you were the highlight of their day when you're in the office. You brought so much happiness and joy to so many people.

I can't even pick up my keys without thinking that you'd pop out from under the couch to give me the guilty look for leaving you home.

I will miss traveling with you. I'm glad you got to go camping with all my friends & experience your first swim. We would've swum more if it weren't so cold! Even my Aussie friends are heartbroken.

I have no idea why I had to lose you especially in this time when I needed you the most as part of my healing process. I want to just hold you.

I hope that you thought I was the best mama to you even when I gave you tough love.

I miss you so much it hurts but I'm glad you are in a much happier place. I bet you get to eat whatever you want now.

I love you very much Bear. You made me very happy, you made me laugh and you gave me great joy. You're my best friend.

Love always and forever.

A letter to Mingo

2010-07-27T12:43:12Z

My heart still breaks for you everyday. I miss you so much! There is not a day that has gone by that i have not thought of you. I say a prayer for you every night. I also tell you goodnight each evening and send a kiss your way. The house is not the same without you in it. Baby Girl misses you, i can tell. Hayden sees your picture on my phone and talks to you every night as well.

Believe it or not Perry still cries for you. He is all the time saying "Why did Mingo have to go?" I just tell him that it was your time, and you are no longer suffering. Daddy is lonely without you, he misses playing ball with you. I kept your bed in the same spot that it was, sometimes Baby Girl lays in it. Your food bowl is still out too. God I miss you so much!

I remember when i first brought you home. You were so tiny! You would sleep at the top of my pillow, on my head! I took you everywhere I went. As you got older I could not go anywhere in the house without you being right by my side (even to the bathroom!). Sometimes I still look down to see if you are there, but you are not.

There are times when I hear what sounds like you walking around in the hallway, and sometimes I think that it is you just checking on us! I made you a nice memorial up on the hill. I can look out the kitchen window and look up at you everynight. I hung solar powered latern's by your grave so you would have light. I also hung a bird feeder out for you, because I know you loved to chase those birds! We also put a couple stepping stones out there as your marker. Perry came up with the idea of everyone putting their handprints on your grave marker, it looks really good! Even Hayden's handprint is on there.

My world seems to be empty without you. I was devestated when you passed away! I think I cried for a week straight. I knew that it would happen eventually given your health situtations, but you were such an active dog even though you had heart problems that we thought that you would live for a long long time! God I miss you so very much, that it hurts!

May you rest in peace my sweet Mingo baby! I love you to the moon and back. I will always have a special place for you in my heart. Love you always!

A letter to Finnegan

2010-07-23T17:21:19Z

It doesn't matter how many years pass, Buddy-Boo, I still think of you every day. We had quite the life, didn't we, the three of us? You had this way of binding us together as a family. When we lost you, we lost that.
The week after you died, I went into seclusion and came out a few days later with a draft of a book I had written about you. I found it again a few months ago and read it over, sure that it would be just maudlin and schlock. And it was partially that, but even relevantly, it was a beautiful portrait of you and the people and places you loved.
I was reminded of so many things about you:
Your face after you'd been running in the snow, like in the picture.
The blissful holidays we spent up in Maine.
Your loving, welcoming, gentlemanly aspect, (as long as no cats were involved).
Your big tree in the back yard, and how you would chase the groundhogs who dared to trespass on your property.
Grooming sessions and baths, to which you patiently submitted, knowing how handsome you'd look on the other end (not to mention the treats you'd earn on the way).
The way you would take a proffered carrot out of my hand, carry it to "your" rug, arrange it between your front paws, plop your big fluffy butt down and munch away contentedly.
You were so well brought-up. That was your other daddy's doing more than mine. You and I were more like co-conspirators, best friends. I let you get away with lots more than I should have. But you had stolen my heart... how could I deny you anything?
Sometimes I wonder if I have ever loved another being as much as I loved you. There are times when I think that I am really deficient in the love department, that I can only take love, that I don't know how to give it. You set the perfect example of how to love purely, though. You didn't play favorites; you loved everyone on their own terms, and you gave them exactly what they needed. You could be a buoyant playmate or a companion in sorrow. Or sometimes just a barking maniac. That was okay, too, because you always kept us feeling watchdog-safe.
I know it was hard on you when we moved. How you missed your big backyard. We all three missed it. But you adapted to apartment life, and there was more than enough green just down the street in the park where we would spend time every day.
I think back to the really happy times, and I think back to the black times, and you were always there. On rare occasions you instigated the trouble, like when you ate several feet of that rag rug and had to have emergency surgery. Or the time you got out from the backyard and we wandered the streets calling for you for what seemed like hours, and then when when you finally found me and tore across the street in front of that truck.
I tried never to take you for granted, because I knew that you were a gift, and a rare one, and that I would never have another friend like you. I hope I was able to give back just a portion of what you offered to me.
When we found out you were sick and we had no idea how much longer we would have you: those are the most bittersweet memories for me. You and I would go sit in the park and I would hold you close to me and brush out your beautiful wheaten coat. And you would curl up like a big baby in my arms and I would sing, so softly, in one of your fluffy blue ears: "My Love is Like a Red, Red, Rose."
"And I will love thee still, my dear, till a' the seas gang dry."
And you would look at me from under those big bushy eyebrows with those brown, soulful eyes of yours, and I would know the best happiness I have ever known.
Every time I pass a wheaten terrier on the street, I know that there is a little angel, an urchin spirit, still beaming down love upon me. I see them, and it's like you're there all over again, my little Fluff Nugget.
So if you ever sense that I'm down and missing you more than I can bear, just let my eye fall on a little cousin of yours. I'll get the message.

A letter to To my dear Smoke

2010-07-22T17:36:45Z

I wrote a poem for you, because I was so so sad about losing you. I do that even to this day to express emotions. I hope you like the poem. I still feel like in some way it was my fault, that if I did not have your hernia fixed at the same time as having you "fixed" then this would not have happened. Even though they said it was an accident and told me what happened I still had a hard time dealing with it. Your brother is still not coping very well, he promised never to get close to another animal. I am still blaming myself and this is one way to help me cope. I miss your spunk and I still think about you all the time. I miss you so very much. I know that God is taking care of you now. I hope your sharing the blanket with him as you always stole them from me. Well, here is the poem and I will see you one day. Please forgive me. I am so sorry. I love you still.

Our Dog Smoke

One shiny night on a day in September
we rushed you to the ER
We did not know how much pain you were in
until the doc said, you were too far-gone
We made our decision in love and in fear
for we did not want to lose our dear friend Smoke

No more will we see your tail wag
or see your eyes light up when Kevin comes through the door
Dj will miss his best friend, when he goes to play fetch
and miss you nipping at his leg

You are in our hearts and we will love you always
You were only one year old, but acted like a dog of twenty
Your spunk and playfulness we will miss;
nevertheless, we feel it in our soul and it is then we will blow the air a kiss
Please catch our kisses Smoke, for they are for you and you alone,
take care of God as you sit by his side and make sure to uncover him
when you sleep by his side

In memory of Smoke
August 2005-September 16,2006

Love you always baby

A letter to Woody

2010-07-20T07:39:04Z

After A long period of watching my best friend slowly going downhill, I made the decision that I thought would come later than sooner. It breaks my heart to lose him and I know I'll never recover from it. I did what was best for him not me. I know he was suffering but he would never show it. He gave me one long lick on the face more to tell me thanks for a wonderful life and to finally let him go. He was a Therapy dog that made many, many people happy. That was the great part of owning such a great dog. Therapy for so many people. He just loved to do it. Yesterday when I had him go to the happy hunting grounds was not such heartache as it is today. I know the decision was right for him and I just think now I was being selfish for not letting him go sooner. He's with all of his friends and I hope to god I'll see him again. A mother was telling her little girl that dogs have short lives and the girl said that's because they love so hard their whole life it takes every bit of energy out of them. I believe that. I know it takes time to heal heartaches but this one is forever. I love you Woody and I hope you are free of pain now. I also have another yellow lab(Lucy) that knows he's in a better place. She's not the same as she was yesterday. I'd Like to Thank my wonderful mother, sisters, my Niece and mother-in-law for being there for me. You just never know how much you love them until they are gone. Woody you'll never be forgotten. Please God take great care of him. I know you will.

A letter to Gilbert

2010-07-13T16:07:54Z

Words cannot express how much you meant to me. You lived for 15 years and every day you were my best friend. I loved you so much and I know that you hung around a lot longer then you wanted because you loved us so much. I remember how much you loved to be around people and everyone loved you so much. When we got Cooper, I know you were upset but you really took it in stride and learned to love him. I miss you so much Gilbert. Thank you for all the love, wags and kisses. You will be in my heart forever.

A letter to CJ

2010-07-13T09:29:31Z

I miss you so much everyday! You were the sweetest puppy ever. Nobody knows me the way you did! I don't know if what we did at the end was right or wrong. I wanted to keep you here....that was selfish of me. Please always know we loved you! We have Maddie and Nelly w/ us. I wonder how you would have all gotten along!We were so lucky for the time we had you. I love you sweetie!
Be at peace and I will see you again someday!
Love
Mama

A letter to Trixie and Teddy

2010-07-13T06:15:31Z

Trix, it's been 2 years now since you've been gone. I'm so glad I rescued you from that home, oh so many years ago... I miss you so much. Thanks for being my girl!

Teddy,
It's been almost a year now since you've been gone. My favorite dream is of you bouncing around, free, running through the grass. I miss your grumpiness.
I miss your toothless smile! I miss your gentle nudges and kisses!

A letter to Turtle, Tessa, and Nelson

2010-07-12T02:59:18Z

Dear Turtle,

I called you Not-My-Kitty for the first six months of your stay with us. I was sure we would find you a new home. But you stole my heart and stayed for two years. I had no idea how hard it would be to say good-bye to you. I wanted the Vet to tell me that another round of antibiotics would give us more time - he had always done so before - but I knew.

You were my time-keeper. I have never been a morning person but each day you woke me with a soft paw to the chin and a silent meow. And each morning I rose with you and the sun to feed you. You ran a tight ship needing a meal every five hours. We all got used to it. After you left, it took me a long time to stop waking with a start wondering where you were. It took a long time to stop trying to open a can of food every five hours. I don't think I will ever stop missing you.
? - 09/15/2009

Dear Tessa,

Your name means fourth child, and that is what you were to me. Losing you hurt as if I was losing a child I'd birthed. I wanted you to be ok. I wanted you to stay with me. I knew you couldn't.

I miss your snoring. I miss you standing on my feet. I miss your sweet face. I knew the day you were born that there would be a day we'd have to part - eleven years doesn't seem to be enough. Summer has begun and I miss plucking your poofs and letting the wind carry them out of the yard. You were my chunk-o-lina, my sweet pupper-girl. You raised the boys right and you taught Abby all the dog rules. You were an amazing companion to all of us.
3/23/1998 - 10/21/2009

Dear Nelson,

After losing Turtle and Tessa every one else in the house was ordered to be healthy for 365 days. You made it eight months. The cancer took you so fast. You were playing with a foam ball like a kitten on Friday and only partly alive by Sunday morning.

I wasn't sure we should adopt you. You were older than I was looking for. But when you showed us your big heart, I was sold. Little did I know just how much you would touch my life in the three years I shared with you.

Turtle was my time-keeper and Tessa was my heart, but you were my man. You took care of all your girls. You groomed them and loved them and still had time to love on me. I miss seeing you sitting by the door as I come in each day. I still look at the cat tree and want to find you there. I miss you tapping me on the leg asking to be picked up and cuddled. I miss you sleeping in the crook of my arm each night. I keep searching the shelters looking for a cat that can replace you; that's a search that will last the rest of my life.
? - 6/6/2010

Be well my friends. XO

A letter to WALLACE

2010-07-09T10:55:14Z

When you were first born, I had no idea what an incredible gift from God you were. In the days that past, you and I seemed to forge a bond that I have nor will probably ever have again with human or animal. You were the most loving animal, friendly to everyone, even thought you were so large, at first people were frightened of you, then they saw what a big sweet tender heart you had and couldn't help but love you. I loved the way you LOVED the ball, you slept with it, and even tried to eat with once. No matter what I had going on in my life Wallace, you knew what I needed, and you were there for me. I hope that I somehow was as good to you as you were to me, I know that you deserved the best, because that is what you were. You made your rounds and stole everyone in this families heart, When you got sick it was so hard to believe because you have always been the definition of energy and health.It seems unfair that you only had 8 1/2 years with us. But I know you are with God, and I know that I will see you again one day..We had the best times together, and I will forever love and miss you, Wallace you are my best friend and I you will always have you in my heart.

A letter to Mom

2010-07-07T07:43:13Z

I miss you, mom
---- But I'm not gone
I miss you, mom
---- But I'm still there
I miss you, mom
---- My heart surrounds you
I miss you, mom
---- I'm everywhere
I miss you, mom
---- Don't suffer, son
I miss you, mom
---- We're not apart
I miss you, mom
---- I'm with you still
I love you, mom
---- With all my heart

A letter to Murphy

2010-07-06T18:51:08Z

I miss you more than words can say. It's only been a day since I said goodbye to you, and I can't even think of you without bursting into tears. My heart is broken. The house just seems empty without you in it. Everyone keeps telling me that you are in a better place, and I truly believe that. It doesn't make me feel better right now. It just reminds me how much I love and miss you.

All of your "antics" over these last fourteen years are what made you so special and what endeared you to all of us. My sweet, gentle giant, you will always be loved, and we are all better off for having you in our lives. I hope that soon my tears will turn to laughter when I think of you.

I would never dream of allowing you to suffer another minute for my own selfish reasons, and I am so glad you were able to "tell" me that you were ready to go. I cherish the last hour of "snuggle time" we had on the floor as you allowed me to stroke your head. Even then you were able to kiss my tears away.

You were a remarkable example of unconditional love, and I will miss you so dearly.

A letter to Ludwig

2010-07-06T18:31:04Z

I have always proclaimed myself to be a cat person, and I must admit I am attracted to their curious antics and their quirkiness. They certainly have a lot of "personality."

Even though you're gone the house is not lacking in personality. Between your screwball brother, your nuerotic mother and your fastidious father, we have enough personality in spades.

What is missing in this house is the kindness, gentleness and constant affection that you offered. Not to mention the patience and loyalty. This house is colder with you not in it, and every room feels empty now that you're not laying by my feet, looking up at me with your soft brown eyes.

I took you for granted, Lud. You were the goofy dog who would love ANYBODY, I told myself. As if THAT we're an inherent flaw. I could use some of that affection now. I wish you could comfort me, assure me with a tender nuzzle of your head, that what we did to you was the right thing. And that we did not do wrong by you.

Finny is doing his best to comfort me, but he in no way compares to you.

I love you, Lud. And I'm sorry that nature and "circumstances" dealt you such a cruel hand. If there is a heaven, please wait for me. I've called on a few angels to keep you company until I can look into your kind brown eyes again.

A letter to Enchanted Moose

2010-07-06T18:27:56Z

You are my best friend and companion, I miss you too much to put into words. Everything I try to do I look for you behind me, you're not there. I call out your name, you are not there. I hope you are no longer in pain, I'm hurting for the both of us. The pain is as fresh as when you left on June21. We have lost a lot in the past year but it is not fair that you too were taken from me. I love you and miss you every minute of every day.

A letter to Ringo

2010-07-06T13:41:20Z

What a wonderful companion you were to me. I love all your little quirks; your fear of squeaky toys, your lopsided ears, and of course your loyalty to anything that would get rid of things you didn't like. You came to us full grown with a mysterious past we could never figure out, but to us you were our puppy. Alas you had little use for play but got endless enjoyment out of sitting in the grass, letting the wind flap your beagle ears. Its been a few years since you left us but I'll always have your paw print on my heart. I'll love you always,

A letter to Louie

2010-07-06T13:32:25Z

I lost you in Jan. but you'd been sick for a while. Thanks for being my buddy for so
many years even if you really weren't the best dog ever. I still loved you the best. Hopefully, we'll meet again, my love....

A letter to Maggie

2010-07-06T11:22:18Z

I am so happy that I had the pleasure of meeting you, helping you and finding you a loving home in your last days. I met you while I was working. You would come over, begging for food. Most of the staff fed you, but I'm sure not all of them did. I would go the your home, if you can call it that and ask them to keep you in the house, but they never did. I think I saw you almost hit by cars, as you crossed the street, over a dozen times. You poor girl couldn't hear them, or maybe you didn't really care. I decided that day you came to visit us with icicles hanging off your underside that I would find you a good home. I wanted to take you in myself, but I knew my boys would give you a difficult time and you were such an old gal, I wouldn't let you go through that. I'm so sorry that I made you live at the pound for that week. It was the 'legal' way of doing things. I am so thankful those people that had you didn't come looking for you! I begged my sister to foster you until I could get you into a new home. You were a typical dog's dog, didn't like people in your face, or touching your things and you couldn't hold your bladder very well either, I knew I had to find just the right family for you. I didn't think my sister would be able to help you for a long time, you know what a clean freak she is! But...your Daddy fell head over heels for you! After a few days, so did your Mommy and they wouldn't let you leave them, they loved you so much!! Your Daddy took you everywhere with him. You loved watching the hockey games! They were so worried that day you broke free, to go do your doggie things once more, by yourself. They were everjoyed when you showed up several hours later, filthy, with a giant smile on your face and a twinkle in your eye! The last few days of your life, your Daddy was so sad. He knew you were going to have to go soon. He called me on your last day, ready to set you free so you could do your doggie things forever. I am so happy I got to be with you at the end of your life. I am so happy you cuddled with you Daddy. You change him you know. He was a grump before you. You brought such happiness into his life for the three years you lived with him! And to think the vets said you were between 15 and 17 and would be lucky to make it 6 months! You showed them girl! You may not have had the greatest life before, but I know you did for at least a few years and that you did so much to help your new family. You loved them and you never stopped liking me a whole lot too. I wish you could have stayed a little longer, but I'm happy you didn't have too much pain and you had so much love in your life. Thank you my Maggie May for comming into our lives, letting us love you and changing our worlds. I love you sweetie!

A letter to Biggie, Boook & Roo

2010-07-06T08:46:54Z

Earthly greetings to my "heavenly" Thundering Herd! It sure is quiet here without you - coming through the door at times is unbearable as each of you passed within a 18 month period. What long and wonderful lives you had- we are so thankful for our times together - you were my angels with wet noses!! I look forward to our next meeting on the other side of that Rainbow Bridge I've heard so much about, but in the meantime, have fun, feel well and thank you Biggie, Boook & Roo for all the times you made me feel so special and blessed to have you in my/our lives. We miss you so much and think of you guys every day!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO!!

A letter to Mom

2010-06-27T23:51:14Z

I still can't believe you are gone. It's so unbelievable.

I stop myself sometimes from calling and catch myself thinking that I can still stop by on the way home.

It wasn't enough time, though I am grateful for the time we had... I am wrecked with the thoughts of your final days. It was so hard to stay positive for you. Especially when you would ask if I thought you might make it... I wish that I had thought so, but I was seeing you deteriorate so fast, it seemed impossible and I guess it ultimately was. Nobody outside understood, they kept trying to be positive and would remind me of people we knew that had survived cancer, lived with cancer, beat cancer. Everyone was very supportive and warm; in some ways, that made it harder.

I still can't believe that you are gone. I feel as though you are as close as you've ever been. It's like being teased, really.

I remember watching as you died, you stared blankly at me and kept asking me to help you. There was nothing I could do but my best to comfort you. I pet your hair and kept trying to reassure you and express my love. I have held on so tight to your last words to me, "I love you too." They are emblazoned in my auditory memory and when I think or say aloud, "I love you mom," I can hear your reply.

I remember watching as you began to take your last few breaths. You may even have already been gone, watching us as we sang you on your way. We prayed some of your favorite prayers. My heart broke there and I can't shake the images of that last hour. To see someone I love so much reduced to such pain, agony, fear, sadness is too much to bear.

I hope you are well, I hope you are fearless, I hope you are safe, and I hope you are. I pray that you can hear me when I want you to and that you have been released from that with which you struggled here.

We miss you so much. I miss you.

A letter to Cricket

2010-06-27T11:32:27Z

It has been one week now since you left me behind. I am so sorry that I was not there when you needed me. You were always there for me. I am sorry to that I didn't understand that you were trying to tello me how much you were hurting near the end. You always understood everything I said. We miss you so much. I will always Love you. You will be in my heart forever.

A letter to Zoë

2010-06-23T15:58:44Z

You came into the world a bit early. They weren’t expecting you for several days when your mum decided to have you in a tulip patch. Your dad and I visited you when you were barely a week old. I remember planting kisses on your head and falling instantly and madly in love with you. You looked like a little loaf of bread.

I remember getting updates. Those first grainy black and white pictures coming over the internet of such a serious little girl.

When I found out you had cancer my heart broke. I knew that you would be taken from us too soon. You were such a trooper. Taking your meds and not complaining. Never a whimper or a sigh. When I saw you start to struggle with the stairs that you had previously run up and down while fetching your toy, I knew you weren’t letting on how much you hurt.

Last Sunday afternoon you sat dawn and decided not to get up. I knew the end was near. You didn’t even want to see your beloved toy. That toy that was never out of your sight.

Later that night you kept kissing my hand with such an intensity that I felt you were telling me that you were ready…and getting in as much love as we both could bear.

You died, later that night, at home, while lying on the same blanket you had slept on your first night with us. You took such a huge piece of my heart with you. I just can’t stop crying, I miss you so much. Your baby sister Emma keeps looking for you as well. I see her confusion as she doesn’t quite understand where you have gone.

I will keep my promise to you. You were a good dog, so brave and beautiful.

I will always love you.

RIP Zoë --- June 1999 June 2010

A letter to Scooter

2010-06-22T19:31:21Z

You brought so much to our lives, and I only hope we gave you as much joy and love as you gave to us. You didn't ask for much, just some food, pets, and snuggles on cold nights. You loved the sunny spots that traveled across the lawn in the afternoons, and you were so innocent. I pray every day that you knew how much you were loved, all the way to the end. Your pain was so visible, and every day you suffered, it broke our hearts. I wish there was something more we could have done, I wish I had a magic wand.
You deserved to be at peace, and we miss you so much. I hope that where you are now there is no more pain and you can eat all the fish and chicken you want. I hope there are sunny spots all day long, and cozy places to snuggle if it gets chilly.
We will always miss you.

A letter to Tug

2010-05-31T19:42:08Z

I miss you so much. I miss the way that you always greeted me at the door with a tailwag and an "Arrrlooow". I'm so very sorry for making you go for walks when you didn't want to--I didn't know that you had a cancerous tumour in your pelvis that made it painful to walk. I'm sorry that nothing we tried worked to keep you painfree and comfortable. I try and remember the 9 great years that we had together, and not the last 3 months of your life that were so hard for you. I know how much it bothered you to ask for help getting up the stairs--I didn't mean to hurt you when I grabbed you and lifted you up, I was trying to help you. I would never hurt you deliberately. I hope that you understand why I decided to make you cross the Rainbow Bridge when I did--the tumour had eaten all the bone mass in your pelvis, and if you slipped or fell, you would have broken your hip and been in even more agony that you were on a daily basis. I feel like I may have ended your life a week or two prematurely, but I was trying to spare you more pain. What I did, I did out of love, pure love for you. I hope that you understand that. It's been 3 months, and I still miss you so much. I can't believe that I'll never get to see you again, or feel your soft fur, or hear you complain when you want in and I'm not quick enough to get to the door. Wherever you are, I hope that you are not in any pain and can run and play. Know that I love you and miss you and I always always will. I will never ever ever forget you. You are always in my heart.

A letter to RAINBEAR

2010-05-30T22:03:11Z

MARCH 1ST 2010 you went to sleep. rain i will never be the same. I pray ,I wish I bow to you my heart& soul please forgive me. you were not ready! I keep seeing & hearing the vet saying she is going to wake up are you sure?! omg rain when you lost your hearing and blind I thought maybe you were so uncomfortable maybe unhappy. yet lisa knew my hands were tied it was as she put the gun in my hand you were tring to wake up.please feel my heart it went with you!!!!!!!!!!you were 19 you kept your promise you never leave me and you were and are so much bigger person then most humans you made me peaceful, we are soulmates and you are & were truly amazing spirit and soul. I just cant believe your not here and that day at vet . hear me feel me I love you you are my heart and it went with you.

A letter to Cupcake

2010-05-26T08:07:22Z

I know it's been 2 years since you left, and maybe I shouldn't have grief this raw, but I do. Everyone says time will make it better, and if not make it better, at least dull it a little. I haven't found that to be so. I still miss everything about you, and I still cry when I remember all the love you gave so selflessly. When I was a lonely child, you comforted me. When my world came crashing down in a sea of betrayel and despair, you were there. When I saw no other reason to keep going, you held my cying face in your tiny paws and made me laugh as you licked my tears. You gave me reason, and sometimes, you were the only reason.
14 years wasn't enough. You were my baby before I ever had children. You prepared my heart for the endless love they now recieve. You have touched lives that you will never meet because of your devotion to me. I miss your tiny body curled up next to me, I miss your doggy smell of fur and rawhide, I miss your large eyes whose compassion always filled me with joy, and I miss the way you were content only when it was me at your side.
I know you suffered in the end. I knew you were dying by the look on your face. I was going to do the right thing, and hold you in my arms while the vet put you to sleep for the last time. But you climbed into bed with me that night as I was agonizing over the decision, and you sighed happily. By the next morning, you had passed naturally in your sleep. I think you hung on because you knew how much I needed you. I think that you were able to leave when you saw I was strong enough to let you go. I will love you forever. My heart wil always be yours. My children will know what a dear friend you were to me. For a time, you were my world. Now I hope, that when my day eventually comes, we will be in a world together. Always.

A letter to Jezabel

2010-05-24T16:53:28Z

We had so many nick-names for you - Jeza-butt-bell, Fluffin', Jezi, and I always called you my girl. Oh how I love my girl! We miss everything about you and the house will never be the same. We come home to an empty house now, but sometimes we think we see you snoozing in a corner. The other day I stepped on my slipper and I thought it was you! I was eating chicken the other night and just the smell of it reminded me how you'd jump up on the chair to be closer to the people food. In the middle of the night when I wake up and can't get back to sleep - I look for you. I expect you to find me like you usually did. I miss you and I know you miss us too. I hope you're happy and I hope you understand. We had such a strong bond; it'll never go away. We had our own communication, and you were in Heaven on my lap when I pet you the special way only I knew how to do. You made us laugh every day. We made up songs about you and we still sing them. You were the best lovin' girl kitty in the world. So much spunk and personality! When I traveled, I worried about you but you were fine. For 17 years you were fine. I expected you to live forever because I couln't bear the thought of losing you. I hope you come back to visit often. I miss your meow. I miss your funny way of communicating with us. I miss your eyes and your fur and your fluffy tail. I miss the warmth of you lying next to me. I wish I could still hold you - but I will hold you in my memory, in my heart, in my dreams, in my thoughts forever. I miss you little girl and I love you forever.

A letter to Jimmy

2010-05-19T08:48:11Z

I saw you on Saturday in the vet hospital and you seemed so happy to see us and you seemed to be getting better and yet that same night, May 15, we got a call in the night that you had died. I miss you so and I can't stop crying.
You were my grand-dog. Beautiful, so smart, big ears, tail that never stopped wagging. a coat that gleamed and you gave your mummy so many kisses. A very unusual little dog - cross between a dachshund and a chocolate lab -with litttle stubby legs. He was both fierce and gentle. You're everywhere Jimmy but you're not here. What can I do - I miss you so.

Please if someone is going through the same, please write me
jmbreeck@aol.com

A letter to Daisy

2010-05-19T00:32:23Z

I am so sad that your cycle was ready to pass around. I really loved your ablity to make me smile, even at the hight of my Bipolar, you saved my life so many times I am very sad that I could not do the same for you. I remember your bouncing energy every time I entered a room, didn't matter if I was gone for 5 minutes or 8 hours, you loved me just the way I am, not judgemental. You loved me and looked passed my Mental Illness. I loved how every morning you would like me in the face not allowing me to stay in bed all day, you wanted your walk and where excited that the morning finally came and once again we would go for a walk. I learned from You that love is always possible.

I will always love you, My Daisy-May

A letter to Rain Bear

2010-05-18T22:52:03Z

I love you. You are my heart and soul.

A letter to Irma Cujo

2010-05-17T20:16:55Z

You left so suddenly. They always said you had a heart murmur but nothing ever came of it. We played in the car as we drove home. You nibbled on your knuckles and licked my hand. But when we got home you ran up to your other Mommy and fell over. Within hours your heart failed. That is impossible, your heart was your strongest feature for you loved me.

Impossible, irrational, stubborn, difficult me. Irma, you loved me.

You have been gone 36 hours now. I keep seeing you. I am not sure why I see you. Buddy your big brother dog has realized now you are gone. He is confused. The cats are indifferent, but aren't they always.

Irma, you are my best friend. You went to work with me everyday. You kept me accountable for myself and life. When my MS acted up your look of compassion would encourage me to get up and play with you or take you out. Now what can I do. Today I stayed home from work and sat on my butt. I tried to nap. I tried to sleep but I would wake up and find myself looking for you.

I can't find you. I know you're here. You're in my heart and my mind. It's kind of funny, you had a lot of Facebook and Twitter fans, they all miss you. I guess your personality was just so big.

I am sorry for any pain you may have been in. I hope there was not much. I did what I could. I tried to kiss and love you every waking moment and had I known I can't say I would do anything different, the doctor said your heart was going to fail, I am glad I was able to spend my time with you. My only wish was we rescued you when you were 7 or 8 and I only had you 6 years.

I miss you so much my very best friend.

A letter to Boo (BooBaby)

2010-05-17T09:32:28Z

Baby Im so sorry I was not here to help you...I know it was a rare thing for Mommy to be out of the house after 10 pm...GrandMa say's God needed you more than me & that's why I was gone when He took you...I never thought in a million years a sack of chips would hurt you...I still look at that bag & wonder HOW you got ur BIG head in it and could not pull it off...I know God took you fast & you didnt suffer...Missy was cleaning your ears when Daddy found you....Baby Im so sorry,Im never gonna forgive myself for leaving the chip where you could get them,I know it's my fault your gone & Daddy Misses You so much....It's hard sleeping without you next to me & I dont feel safe at nite with Daddy at work,You know Missy cant hear well so if someone broke in we would be dead B4 Missy realized what was going on LOl...The nite you Passed away I found sum pretty neat stuff,but You know that cuz I know your here watching,what I would do to feel you brush up against me or have you breathing in my ear like u used to do...I miss ur smell and have not washed the bedding because I dont want to ever to erase ur puppy smell... We are getting alot done around the house But You know that to Im sure...Your grave is pretty Not what I want yet But Im trying my Baby to make it beautiful...I hope u like the lights it was the last box of colored ones we could find...I know your free and running & doing all the fun things you didnt get to do on earth...I hope you dont mind Hank & Baily being ion the pen out back,I want to keep them but I dont think Im ready yet for another baby...I try to be Happy my love but it's hard...I have not spilled my coffee since you left & honestly I miss the hot coffee running down my leg cuz you tripped me & I had to yell Dammit Boo and I know you giggled everytime u made me spill it...The baby misses you so much,he said booboo booboo for days after you left...I take him to ur grave but he dont understand yet...Wild strawberries have over taken ur grave & it's beautiful baby,Missy lays beside you alot & Im scared her day is coming she's so old baby I wake up alot to make sure she's breathing LOL Im such a dork I know Baby...God I MISS YOU...Momma kitty had 5 babies yesterday,Buddy [removed]zu thinks he's the Daddy I guess he sure was excited about the babies They are so cut Boo I KNOW u would have loved them...Boo Please let me know your here that you visit I think I hear You late at nite and sumtimes when Im sleeping I wake up cuz I felt sumthing jump on the bed...O BooBoo I didnt realize how much I needed you till it was too late...Daddy says I need a hobby so I got 6 gold fish & an ugly thing that eats the yuck off the tank the gold fish are relaxing to watch,but Id much rather have your head on my lap watching you sleep my love...Just know I will always alway love YOU & I cant wait to be with You & the boys again please keep Guarding the house from anything bad that could happen...I Love You My Angel 2day & Always
Momma,Daddy,Missy,Buddy,Bandit & all the cats....Rest in Peace My Love Bug Boober Baby

A letter to MARK & AMANDA

2010-05-17T06:12:07Z

I'M SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT THE LOSS OF YOUR DOG. I KNOW
HOW MUCH YOU LOVED HIM. WE ARE THINKING ABOUT YOU BOTH.
WE SEND OUR LOVE AND THOUGHTS TO YOU BOTH.

A letter to Jay bird

2010-05-16T06:37:29Z

I'm not coping well without you, your little voice calling me from another room . Your big birdie kisses , your laughing . I miss it all. I would rush home from work everyday for the last 12 years just to see you. I loved your hugs and I loved how much you loved me and relied on me. I can't believe your gone . This is the most painful thing I've ever had to face.I miss you soooo much. You were the most affectionate loving parrot I have ever seen in my life and I'm so happy you got to spend yours with me. I loved you from the day I met you and I will love and miss you till the day I die. My home is quiet without you and my heart hurts terribly. All I see in my head was you perking up and getting happy when I came to the hospital to say goodbye. That will forever be the worst day of my life! I love you baby boy , it's so much more than I love you

A letter to rusty scott

2010-05-14T16:12:10Z

I miss you so much, you were my friend and best pal, Never was lonely, you always made me happy. I loved when you would play with your little brown balls. Never letting any other dogs play with them. I will always love and miss you, I am happy i was home when you passed. Love Always, Lorraine (MOM) Love

A letter to Rosie

2010-05-10T10:46:06Z

My Rose. My sweet, sweet Rosie. Not sure why it's been so hard to accept my "see you later" that beautiful afternoon of March 8th. I kissed you on your head and left as I couldn't bring myself to say goodbye. I'm sorry you were hurting and I'm even more sorry we couldn't do more for you. I am not sure why I still cry when I think of you. You were a black and white nightmare tamed by few but incredibly loyal and loved. I will forever remember how Tim described your last hour. In that final sixty minutes, you were exactly what you should have been all along. We know you always meant well, despite your actions proving otherwise. I thank you for finding Red Dog and Black Dog to check on me when I'm away. They are truly an extension of you. In the last few days, I keep expecting you to be there despite two months since you left us. You are a beautful soul no matter how many shoes we lost, no matter how much of a mess the carpets have become. You have made us all stronger in some way. I know that Jon is taking care of you up there and you can eat all the chicken and pizza you want. The wind is calm, storms have subsided and you can even open a pizza box with your paw holding it closed.

All our love.

A letter to Teddi

2010-05-04T15:42:06Z

I miss you terribly! Every time I look at your puppy pictures, I remember the wonderful times we had. When I look at the later pictures, I remember how awful it was for you in the end. So, I want to remember this and not those. I want to think of you with a smile, not a sob. Some day, that will happen. Some day, I will be able to think past missing you... maybe. Some day I will only smile when I think of our years together...maybe. Until then, I just let the pain flow and the tears fall. My throat tightens and I can't see. One day, this won't happen and I'll still remember the good days. One day.

A letter to Teddi

2010-05-04T15:32:48Z

I can't believe it has been nearly two years that you've been gone. It feels like forever that I've missed you, yet it feels like just yesterday that you were with me. I still tear up when I think of you every day. I miss you more than I ever thought I would. Does that sound bad? People tell me that I should get another dog and you know I've always had a dog in my life, but I just can't do it. I feel so disloyal. 15 years is a long time to develop a relationship. You knew me for who I am and we accepted each other with all the quirks and difficulties.

I always felt that I didn't fight enough for you - with the house situation. I hated that. I mean, I know I fought to get you - and nearly lost a lot in the process - but I allowed him to decide things that I didn't agree with at all. I wish I had been stronger and been able to fight. You dealt with it like a champ - never making me feel guilty (even though I did) and never making me start an argument. But I wish I had. I wish I had fought tooth and nail to change your situation. I'll probably never forgive myself for that. I know you were happy and lived like a true and natural dog, but I wish things had been different. I wish I could've spoiled you with pillows and beds and toys all over the house. I know you had a huge dog house and your own fluffy bed, but I know you were lonely at night. I'm so glad I fought for you in the end. I'm glad we spent so much time together and I certainly didn't care if he felt neglected! He never would understand the relationship people have with pets. I think he has forgotten being a kid because you know he had pets all over the place. But he never seems to feel anything anymore.

I think, because I'll never forgive myself for not fighting harder for your situation, I could never bring another pup into our lives. I couldn't do it again. I couldn't watch someone else make those decisions. I'd probably end up divorced. And worse, I'd feel disloyal to you. I mean, if I can fight now, why couldn't I fight for you back then? I'm sorry I couldn't. Because I love you now as much as I did then and it still hurts so much that you're gone. I'll never forget you, Teddi and I don't know if this hole in my heart will ever heal. I miss playing with you, walking on the hill with you, sitting out in the sun with you. I miss watching you patrol the yard as you listen to the critters. I miss it all. I'm so stupid that I virtually foster abandoned and orphaned dogs who look like you. If I can't have you, at least I can try to help other babies who need someone, like you did when we met. I'm glad I fought as hard as I did to get you into our lives. The boys were so blessed to have you while they were growing up! All of their memories include your smiling face and flowing tail.

I love you, Teddi. That rainbow bridge poem is so beautiful and I sure hope to see you again one day. I know most people don't think that dogs have souls, but I think God has dogs in heaven. I really do. I don't care who thinks its stupid. I hope and pray that I'll see you again soon.

A letter to Matty Starr

2010-05-04T09:24:06Z

I can't count the number of times I stared at you...at acapella shows, rehearsals, in the hospital when you had wires and tubes and pipes coming from everywhere on your body...and wished I was better friends with you. I always had the opportunity. It was always staring right back at me, at my face, wondering why I didn't reach out to you or the rest of our friends more often. We're part of a family where that kind of stuff doesn't really matter, but I can't believe you died before I could try and be a bigger part of your life. I will forever wonder if you noticed me and how much I loved you, despite not knowing you as well as others. We had a great bond and lots of experiences that I will never forget, but you were always giving more of yourself and I should have scooped it up with both hands, both arms, as much as I could take before it was too much. I cry and cry and think to myself "Is this okay? Can I empty myself for someone I'm not sure knew how fond I was of him?" I don't know how I can feel that my tears aren't worthy, it's an awkward feeling. But I love you and miss you so much and if you could see Hannah today, you'd be proud.

A letter to Django

2010-05-03T12:55:29Z

Here's a letter I wrote about you when you left us last year...

"Sometimes I Want to Howl

I remember the night we brought Django home to live with us. It was in late February of 1998 . He was seven or eight weeks old, confused and scared. We had the advantage of not being confused but I was scared about the responsibility we had decided to take on. It was going to be up to us to care for this little life and to teach him the things dogs need to know.

We had him in the backseat of our little Volkswagon Fox, in a borrowed cat carrier stuffed with soft towels and a dog toy the breeder had given us to help reassure our little pup. The toy had been in the pen with the rest of Django's family and so it was covered with scents familiar to him. Gina was driving us home through the dark and I had a small flashlight so I could check in on the puppy. My first vivid memory of Django is of flashing that light into the carrier and seeing two frightened baby blue eyes peering back at me. I was hooked.

Over the course of the next 11 years I would often look into those eyes which had turned a hazel green by the time he was one. I took something from the trust that I saw in those eyes. Django knew he was a part of our pack and that he was safe with us. There was no place else he wanted to be but with us. That was a comfort most of the time but heartbreaking too when we had to leave him behind so we could travel.

As he grew older and less able to move around it seemed his despair at being left behind grew more and more intense. Now, we're the ones left behind and as I try to come to terms with the reality that I will never look into those eyes again I sometimes feel like howling at the top of my lungs until he comes home. That's what Django would have done for us."

I still miss you buddy.

A letter to Sarah (Angel-bear)

2010-04-27T21:11:04Z

(Angel-bear),

I love you, always.

Love,

A letter to Sarah (Angel-bear)

2010-04-27T15:54:06Z

Oh, my Angel. To say I love you isn't saying enough. You were my miracle. I didn't deserve you. I never have. Watching you fade with each day takes a little of me too. Knowing you're staying because I can't let go shows me how your love is boundless. You were never the one who left, I was the one who left - on vacations, for school. You were ALWAYS there, waiting, hoping. And now watching you struggle to stay with me . . .

I will love you always. I knew you were my dog from the day you were born. Just your beating the odds to live proved that. And when your mother rejected you, I loved you and bottle-fed you. Now you're 13 1/2 years older and still see you as I always have. There are no more eye droppers of milk but IV bags of fluid.

I'm sorry for every time I wasn't there for you. I'm sorry for every time I left you, for the day, a week, a month, more. We will never have those days again. I'm sorry I took them from us. They were important and see that now when there are so few left.

I'm scared of the world without you in it. I'm scared of the pain of saying good-bye. I'm scared of the emptiness that you fill. I'm scared because you were the one who licked my tears and warmed my lap. I will need you when you go and you won't be there.

I love you and thank you for sharing my life. You have no idea what you meant to it, how you added, completed it. I love you, love you, love you, love you. I will see you again when you jump into my arms once more at Heaven's gate. Until then know that I will miss holding you, petting you, playing tug with you, feeding you, brushing you, seeing you. I will miss all those thousands of details that constituted our life together. And somehow knowing you'll be with me in spirit just isn't the same, isn't enough.

I will treasure our last few days together and make sure I'm always there by your side, a pale imitation of what you have done for me for over a decade. I promise to spare all pain that I can. To give all the company and care you need. I promise that I won't hold onto you when the pain is greater than your heart can stand.

I love you. I'm sorry. Thank you.

A letter to Mickey the Dog

2010-04-21T05:16:22Z

Not a day goes by that I don't think of you. Maybe I should be "over it" by now but you were my boy and so I guess I am not. It's been more than five years now since you left on a new journey. Sometimes I can see you in my mind's eye sitting beside me. The only difference now is that mostly I think of you and smile rather than cry. But I sure do miss you.

I hope I provided you the life you wanted to live and gave you all the love you desired and needed...So that your next life would be even better than this!

I miss you Mickey. You were kind and compassionate and always ready to lend an ear and a shoulder to cry on when I need it. Thank you for being there.

A letter to Mom and Dad

2010-04-21T01:56:09Z

I really miss you a lot. I try to be an adult about growing up and being self reliant. But I miss the security of waking up to you and being able to share daily happenings. I wish I never left home. And I am really sorry I did. For all the experiences I have had to date will never compare to sharing life with you. It is difficult being a late life adult child and losing you both one to cancer and now one to Alzheimer. I will always love you no matter what. I miss you Dad. I took care of mom to the best of my capabilities. You know how stubborn she is! But we finally made piece and became "friends" again as you asked me to promise we would. We did. She is okay and with your son right now. But she misses you a lot, too, as she changes into a different person each day further away from the mom I know. I wish for one day back home just as things were, just one day. I love you.

A letter to Ernie

2010-04-20T11:05:27Z

It's so difficult to believe its almost been one year since you've been gone. I want you to know I still cry sometimes because I miss you and that if I could have anything in the world, it would be to have those years before I knew you back right now. Seven years just wasn't enough, but I sure am glad I had them. I got a new little buddy who was born on the day I lost you, I thought it was a great thing because we could celebrate you and him on the same day. His name is norman and he's silly pup, you would probably tell him to buzz off. When I think about you, I still remember the way it felt to pet your fur and I imagine you smiling and running around chasing after the carpenter bees like you used to do back in New Orleans. I know we'll see each other again one day, but just know that you're in my thoughts all of the time and you will always be my old man best friend.

A letter to Callie and NIkki

2010-04-20T04:58:48Z

And this goes out to ALL of my friends who took great care, and continue to take GREAT CARE, of MY GIRLS... I owe you a world of gratitude, and love, for keeping them safe and happy. Whether I was heading out to sea, exploring the seafloor in a little submersible, locked in the NR-1 nuclear submarine, diving with the whale sharks and Manta Rays, flying to Hawaii or London, or simply exploring the streets of Philadelphia, New York City, or Lancaster, PA, I always knew you were SAFE....And thought of you often.

Anything else in this world is a relatively minor detail...

A letter to Callie, AKA the DINGO

2010-04-20T04:47:36Z

We miss you IMMENSELY... The 4 am wake up calls. The barks that sound like they are coming from the rabid beast from hell... Knowing you would guard this house from harm and intruders if it took your last breath... Your heavy panting all night long while laying on the tile floor next to my bed. Loving Little Scarlett and newly adopted Brown Dog Molly like they were your own. Teaching Molly the truly wonderful experiences in a dog life... Chasing every squirrel that tries to steal the bird food, and rolling on your back in the grass during the mid Day sun... she does both very, very well, but has yet to catch one of those furry tailed buggers, like you amazingly did three times... I am glad you went peacefully, and lived your 11 years to the absolute fullest... At 44, you are a reminder that I must do the same. Mom, Aunt Suzie, and Linda arrive here in 8 hours, after an early flight. Although it has been almost a year since you left, they all miss you and wish you were still here. This house will always be a safe heaven for family, friends, and stray hounds. And when we go to the beach, wade in the surf, chase the shorebirds, and sprint in random directions as fast as possible, we will wish you were still here. Dingo, you and Nikki were the greatest companions a mortal human being could have ever asked for...We will love you both dearly forever.

The Pack Leader,DCW, the Bigeye Thresher.
Little Scarlett Weaver
Molly Brown Dog Weaver

A letter to Patty-Cakes

2010-04-19T20:59:21Z

The 17 years I had with you were the best of my life. Devastation doesn't even begin to explain what I felt when we had to let you go. You were a constant calming presence in my life. I loved everything about you, even when you got loose and wouldn't let me catch you. I even loved that you would never let me take your picture. I loved sharing my peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with you. I miss being groomed by you and how you wouldn't let me leave if you were still itchy. I miss hearing your knicker each morning. Lady has your stall now... and she whinnies to me every morning... but it is not the same. I love you with all my heart and I'm glad that you aren't sick anymore. But I miss you very much.

A letter to Mom

2010-04-19T19:48:11Z

I lost my mother in January 9 this year, I still don't know if I am dealing with it right. I don't really have anyone to talk about it with, I'm older - 26, but I have lived away from home in other states until this. She had cancer, lung cancer, and I moved back home when she had it. She only had it for a few months before her passing. I can't talk to my dad or younger sister about it, I have to be strong for
them. See originally we are from Ireland and we are the only fam over here, I don't have an aunt or uncle to confide with so I really think I am just burying it all inside of me and I am scared about that. We had the funeral in Ireland which was great considering...I don't know what I want to write except that I miss you mom, Dad misses you, life aint life anymore without you and I really want to move on with life but I can't, you were the best part of my life, you were my rock, you were the perfect mother. Sweet yet strong when you needed to be. A part of me just wants to move far far away and start a new life, while another part wants to ensure the rest of my immediate fam is alright. My Dad will move soon, he should, im trying to push him towards that, It just feels like my life has eroded and I have no clue what the future holds or what I should do. I am just very scared and lost without her and this is my first time losing someone close to me, I have been lucky in that sense, but still I am lost. I am just wondering does this pain ever go away or am I going to be a mental mess for the rest of my life? Seeing her body on the floor will never go away and it does affect me very deeply. I dont need to have someone "talk to me." That is BS, its happened to people for 1000's of years, I know it would not be easy, I never knew it would be so hard...

A letter to Pepe

2010-04-12T00:09:21Z

The past week has been one of the worst periods of my life. The house is so quiet without your barks--and my whole world feels so empty without you in it. But I know that I do have to carry on without you. As I write this letter to you, I am trying to turn a corner: I hope to move away from the darkness of the grief, sorrow, and anger, and instead find a sunnier spot in which to honor your memory.

I'll never forget that moment when you and I first met. There you were, sitting in that cage, waiting for the next chapter of your life. I felt a connection to you as soon as I looked into your eyes and at your sweet face. You spoke to me immediately, and insistently. I didn't think I wanted a third dog, but you were able to convince me otherwise. You just could not be resisted. Making you a member of my family was one of the best decisions I have ever made.

You brought such joy and happiness to my life. Thank you. Your endless devotion to me enabled me to survive the loss of Kelsey. When she left us, you helped me see that I could go on without her. Now that you are gone, I hope that the remaining members of our family can do the same, as I struggle through your absence.

You were, and will always be, so very special to me, Mr. Peeps. I will forever miss our errand-running trips--I'll never get into the car and not think about you sitting right next to me, and not long for those special times we shared, away from the others.

You were my little drama boy, yet such a tough guy--way too big for your britches. If I can find just a sliver of your spunk and bravery now, for myself, I know that I can get through the loss of you.

I know that you are still here with us now, in some way, and that you will always be. But I wish that I could touch your soft fur, and see you again: sleeping on your bed, rolling around on my bed, begging for a bite of my dinner, running off with your chewie, laying in the warm sun, zooming around the cul-de-sac, or hear your greeting as you welcomed me home. For now, all I have is these wonderful memories of you. And they will have to do. Until we meet again, and I know we will. I love you, Pepe, Little Sheriff. You are so precious.

A letter to Pepe

2010-04-10T12:21:39Z

A letter to Dad

2010-04-08T22:59:40Z

Hi Dad,
I miss you so much it hurts. Its time for an update on your daughters life. I volunteer for RideAbility now in Pine Island. Its amazing that I can work with horses and be around people, I'm still trying to find a job, Jesse and I r hoping/trying to buy our first house this year. I miss the late night Wal-Mart trips with you, our late night jaunts to Missouri, I even miss the smell of smoke in the house,watching wrestling with you and eating all the food that Mom said was bad for us. I miss going to the rodeo with you, the way you slept on the couch, with the t.v. on and the remote in your head. Jesse sleeps like you a lot, he drives like you, he even drinks pop like you did, he doesnt eat a lot like you did, he reminds me of you. Are you proud of who your daughter has become??? Stacy and Jordan will be married for a year on Halloween, dont ask why they got married on Halloween they just did, Jesse and I will celebrate 2 years of marriage on July 26th, Jason has a beautiful baby girl that hes trying to get custody of, Katrina is still in her group home and she hates it, Mom has a new boyfriend too and hes nice but hes a lot like you. Eileen and Jason are expecting a baby girl any day now, Johnny's gonna be a big brother. MOM is having trouble in the cities with her landlord. Ashley and Brad are back together and her parents have no idea. We are all going to the Minnesota Horse Expo its gonna be awesome. Well I guess thats all i have for now, so I will talk to you later. I Love and Miss you.

A letter to Bacardi Silver

2010-04-07T06:54:04Z

I'm sure you knew how much I loved you. We cuddled every night. It's been so[explitive removed]since you moved on. Remember all the fun times we had with Santa and how much you loved playing with tha one toy mouse until you tore it apart. You know, no one will use your tunnel. That is yours, and I think the others know that. I walk into the bedroom thinking you'll be on the bed or in the closet, and then I realize that you're not there. When I lay down to go to sleep I don't have anyone to cuddle with. Your brothers and sister just don't cuddle like we did. I will always remember the first day I found you. To think no one wanted you. It was because you were ment for me, so I could give you the best life I could. No one thought you would live as long as you did, but you proved everyone wrong. The day I found the mass, I thought to myself that it really wasn't there and that everything would be fine. I'm sure that you are much happier now, and feel so much better. You are with your littermates now. I know Aunt Dawn and I both agree you are all up to something. If I get another cat, it isn't to replace you in my heart. It is to make it things go by faster and give another kitty a chance at have a great family. It is impossible to replace you in anyway. You were the best cat anyone sould ever ask for. Please forgive me if the first injection stung a little. The point of it was to make you comfortable, not to harm you. I know you jumped and seemed liked it hurt. I was just trying to ease your suffering. Once you were asleep I held you for the rest of it in my arms. I can never change anything, but I hope I didn't upset you. I really can't type anymore, because I can't stop crying. Maybe it was too soon to try to type this letter, but I needed something to help me deal with your loss.

A letter to L

2010-04-01T08:12:42Z

You were and still are the love of my life. While I understand that you had no control over your circumstances, I still get angry that you "chose" to finally accept what you had always known and move your life in that direction. I feel like our love should have been enough for you to go on with the life that we built together.
Now, when I look at you, I don't even see the man I married anymore. Simply the woman that took over. I still care for you deeply, but I am no longer in love with you. I feel like I am ready to move forward in my life but fear that in doing so, I will push you into another attempt to take your life. Our children still need you, I still need you. It's a lot of guilt for me to carry and sometimes I hate you for putting it on me.
I often hope that you will meet someone that makes you happy so that I will then be free to do the same.

A letter to Oreo

2010-03-31T15:06:29Z

The day you were born I knew instantly that you were the one. You were so fragile, and all I wanted to do was hold you. It killed me when my mom kept telling me you were too little to be held. I will never forgot the many times mom had people coming over to adopt you or one of the other little kitties, and I hid you in my shirt every time. I couldn't stand the fact that another person would hold you and play with you and be able to call you by another name. You were my best friend. You made me laugh and you comforted me when I needed it. You were spunky and upbeat and you always knew how to make me smile. The day mom told me that you weren't feeling well I remember crying for hours. I remember how tired and exhausted you were. It was so sad to see a cat like you, go through such pain. There were days when I thought you were surely going to die and then there were days when I was sure you were going to be alright. The day we brought you to the vet was the day I had to make one of the hardest decisions that I'd ever been faced with. It was the decision between life, and death. As you lay there on my pink princess blanket, with your dark eyes staring back at me, I couldn't help but see that you were ready. The vet offered an expensive and painful operation that had a 50% chance of failure. I knew that if you had the operation and it was successful, I would be able to be with you longer but I also didn't want you to feel anymore pain. At age 10 I had to make that decision. I remember taking one last look at you and realizing what I had to do. When I told the vet that I would like you to be put down he was astonished. He thought for sure that I would choose the operation. I knew that you were in pain and I didn't want to be selfish. I was given 5 minutes to say my last goodbye's to you. I knew 5 minutes wouldn't be long enough to fully explain how much you meant to me but I knew 3 words (I love you) and a kiss would suffice. I hope I made the right decision and that I helped you pass on peacefully. I hope there are plenty of cat toys up there and I hope you know that I meant what I said that day. I love you Oreo, and I always will.

A letter to Casey Crawford

2010-03-23T06:57:54Z

Not a day goes by that I don't look for your smilin face and sweet bark. It's been just over a month since you went to that great agility field across the rainbow bridge. So young, you had to leave us so early - just shy of your 10th birthday old boy - Mom's millinum baby - you went through so much. You where our first beautiful sheltie boy. So loving patient and kind. You were one of a kind - and everyone just loved you. You introduced me to the sport of agility, showed me how your love of everyone took us to doing Therapy dog visits. You light the way for us to love more shelties - and LIbby, Cole and Winston miss you so much as well. Those 3 dogs seemed so lost for that first month , and your daddy and I cried and cried for you. Casey I love you so much, and I wish you could be here with me with all of us but I know we will again be together, running agility, laughing, playing ball, floating in the water and loving each other as we always have. You taught me so much, and there will never be another like you - be good, and stay sweet and we will again be together- you are now in a special place where you don't hurt, or suffer you just love. We love you Casey - I hope you knew that, I will never ever forget your handsome face, your sweet loving ways and your sheltie kisses - stay safe and warm and loved - and remember to share your ball! kisses and hugs your Mamma, Daddy and your sister Libby and brothers Cole and Winston :)

A letter to Shiva

2010-03-20T21:25:00Z

You were the light of my life,the love of my soul and are eternally with me.
Coming from the shelter so many years ago we both embarked on a journey unlike any other I have ever known.
My sweet gentle soul, you made a difference so huge in the life of all humans that you met and the other animals around you. Without your presence and all of the wounds that you carried I would have never begun the path of animal healing- thank you for teaching me the patience and the perseverance that it takes to heal from abuse.
Enjoying life took on a new meaning when I saw you blossom .
You noble one, you wiggly butt, you sweetie boy, I see you dance in heaven !

A letter to Katie

2010-02-04T13:49:34Z

It's been 20 weeks without you now. Oh sweetheart I miss you still. Sometimes I see your pictures and wish I could jump in. You were my teacher, my daughter, my friend and my protector. I wrote this poem shortly after you passed from my life.

I listen for the pitter patter of your little paws, but they're not there,I look in vain for the furry shadow that used to follow me everywhere.
I miss the belly rubs and even the walks in the cold.
I miss your big brown eyes that spoke to my soul.
I miss your goofy smile and your soft furry ears.
I miss the sound of you drinking from your water bowl.
The spot where you slept sits empty, forlorn.
Just like my heart.
All I have left are the memories and my tears.
Vacuuming your little furballs shoots arrows into my heart knowing there will never be more.
I miss your beg.
I miss sharing my meals with you.
Checking the mail is now a chore without you by my side.
The house is empty and silent and so is my heart.
I know you want me to live for two but how can I?
I don't know where to begin to have a life without you by my side.
It doesn't feel right.
It isn't fair.

I still feel this way sometimes. I still cry sometimes though I know you'd hate to see me sad. Even knowing the end, I'd do it all over again. Your love made me a better person. I still feel you with me. You'll always be in my heart.

Thank you for sending your furry "sister" Wendy to share the next part of my journey.

I love you baby.

A letter to Mr. Fish

2009-12-27T17:00:56Z

So sad this morning, to find you so still, still with your 'love bubbles' in your little home. We knew you were fading, your color no longer so brilliantly blue-hued, your fins dragging, your lack of interest in food.

Three years. I think that's a good long time to share with a little blue fighting fish, and I'm glad you hung around with us that long. You taught me so much about emotional resonance, and how even the smallest little fighters are spiritual beings. It was fun to practice yoga with you, and so sweet when you blew little bubbles and made little faces at me when I chanted. You'll always be with me in that space of sound.

It was strange to hold you in my hand as we readied you to rest in the garden next to Rogue. So still.

Thanks for all the bubbles.

A letter to Rusty

2009-12-26T10:17:58Z

I came to this site knowing there was a beagle there. When I saw Pushkin it was like seeing you again the first time. Your spirit shone through his eyes. I thought I was doing so well...I felt like I'd been punched and couldn't breathe. I miss you baby boy. My Rusty Dusty Dog...my Rusty Bucket. You were not an easy dog but I KNEW you as soon as I saw you. I will ALWAYS miss you. Forever in my heart....

A letter to Chester Pierre "Cheddie"

2009-11-23T23:35:37Z

Mommy loves you and misses you so much. There has not been one day that has past since the day you left me that I have not thought about you. I miss you so much. I miss when you tried to get a bark out and you just made that funny grunt sound. I miss that the most. I miss how excited you would get and how you tried to act like you were a big boy. You were my big boy at only ten pounds and I loved every ounce of you. You were my little man , my son that I never had, the love of my life, my everything. And now even after one and half years have gone by I still can't seem to admit that you are not just gone and will be coming home that you have moved on into the arms of the Man that had created you and put you on this earth for me to eventually find you and to rescue you from having to live a miserable life outside in the freezing cold with no one to keep you warm or no one to hug you and to tell you how much you are loved. I still can't imagine how horrible it had to of been that winter while you tried to keep warm all by yourself in that cold dark chicken house with very little to eat. I don't think I will ever be able to understand how horrible it had to of been for you to of slept out side in the freezing cold or how you even made it when I knew how cold you would get just going outside to go potty in the winter. I promised you that you would never be cold again when you came to live with me and I made you a toasty warm snow suit and kept you covered up at night next to me so you would stay snuggley warm and never be cold again.
I would have given you more if you could of only stayed here longer with me. I loved you more than my life itself and I still love you little guy. I loved your sneaky way that you would do things to me to tease me and I told you that you were a little monster when you would run away from me and almost cause me to have heart failure running after you in an attempt to catch you. The whole time that you were running from me I saw you smiling as you turned your little head to see if I was still chasing you.
I did everything in my power to make sure that you had the best food and the warmest bed and I did this because I had to protect you from those things that would have hurt you if I had just left you to go out on your own. I was so scared of loosing you for all the years I had you I never was able to relax and just live ...I was always afraid of what I would ever have done without you and how would I ever be able to go on without your sweet little smile to see on that little face of yours every day.
Cheddie... Mommas so sorry I wasn't able to keep you here longer and I hope and pray that you know how much I love you and that I didn't keep you here to make you suffer. I thought that I would be able to help you to get better because of all the information I had read of the different cases and how the little dogs were healed. I am angry with those people that wrote those books on natural healing because they made me think that your heart problem was a simple thing to fix and everything would be alright.
Thank you so much for all of your self that you gave to me and for helping me get through the tough times in my life. Cheddie I love you so much and I miss you more than I can ever explain to you. Mommy loves you my little man. Thank you for the last kissy you gave me that last day. Thanks for sharing your life with me. I hope you had a good time here.

A letter to Mina

2009-11-22T04:52:15Z

It's two weeks today since our last full day together. I wake up every morning thinking about you and hoping, hoping to see you when I walk out into the living room.

We had a glorious last day together, didn't we? I was thrilled to see you standing at the window, ready to take a walk in the sunshine and cool morning air. It was a typical walk, except for its length. You surprised me by walking all the way to the front of the property and all the way around, sniffing everything along the way and looking up at me from time to time.

I love that look when we're walking. You're checking on me, making sure I'm OK if I'm too quiet. The love in your eyes always prompts me to bend down and kiss your head.

You're in heaven, I know that, and you're happy and safe and warm and well fed and you have friends - no doubt you've made a lot of friends - and loved. Do you know how much I love you? I worry about that a lot. One can make a lot of stupid mistakes in 13 years and I made a lot with you. I left you behind on a couple of vacations and overnight trips and sometimes I didn't get home very early. I'm so sorry for every time I ever hurt your feelings - I didn't mean it. Please know, Mina baby, that I love you more than anyone ever and I tried to show it every day. You are my one true love and you will always be ...

I went to the sanctuary yesterday for the first time in a month and I cried as soon as I turned up the long drive. I remembered talking to you on the warm August day and telling you about all the wonderful animals you'd see and the nice people you'd meet. It makes me smile to think of you walking away from the tame geese who were so curious about you, and how you barked at the cows as they all walked up to the fence to get a look at you. I didn't stay for the entire event because I was missing you and wanted to come home to you.

Whenever I'm away I still have this urge to get home to you. Wherever I am this feeling that I have to get home is always there. You were always, always my first priority, even when I screwed up.

Thank you, thank you my dearest love, for taking such good care of me for your entire life. You licked away my tears, you acted the fool to get me to cheer up, you laid by my side whenever I was sick, and you never once let me down in any way. Not even when you ate something off the ground that made you sick!

I miss you, Mina Bean. I miss you more than I ever thought possible. I know that time will pass and I'll go on with this life in some fashion. And I know that some day I'll die, too, and we'll be together forever. Don't worry about me, sweetie, I'll figure this out.

You are in my heart and you will always be in my heart, baby girl.

All my love ...

A letter to Dottie Ruth Clement

2009-11-21T20:11:04Z

It's been ten days since we had to make that horrible decision to let you go because you were in pain and gasping for breath. You were so very special to us because you were the kitty that my brother Dan "borrowed" from the shelter to keep our mom, who was receiving hospice care, company during her last days. She had colon cancer which had spread to her liver, lungs, and brain - and I think it's very ironic that the kitty who spent many hours on her hospital bed was gasping for air at the end, just like mom. You both had fluid in the lungs. Dan said the first thought that came to his mind was that Mom wanted Dottie Ruth with her (mom's name was Ruth). I like to remember all the little quirks you had - you were very unique and unlike any cat I've ever had. My husband Jerry loved you as much as I did, it was apparent to me. After mom passed I drove mom's car from Tucson to Washington State where we live, and you were an awesome little traveler. You meowed for a little while, and then you were curious, sometimes sitting on my lap or moving around the car on the piles of stuff I was bringing back with me. Then you'd go back into your carrier and sleep for a while. You were a petite little girl, very thin despite your hearty appetite. You loved to lick nostrils and drink water from the tap in the bathroom. We had our ritual every morning after you laid on me all night long - you'd follow me into the bathroom and I'd turn on the water for you. Then you'd hang out with me while I got ready for work every day. Oh how I miss that. What I wouldn't give to have you back again. And your meow - you had such a distinctive way of meowing, unlike any I've heard before. And when we had a food that you liked, you practically jumped on the plate while meowing that funny meow of yours. Jerry became upset with me because I wanted to hang on to you, but he couldn't bear to see you suffer, and neither could I. My way of coping was to buy a book called "Cold Noses at the Pearly Gates" by Gary Kurz because I wanted so desperately to know that I'd see you again. This book supports the notion that I will, and it is Bible based. I hang on to that. Dottie, I really, really hope that you are in a place where you are happy, whole, loved, and with Mom! No more suffering for you. We only had you for about fourteen months, but I became so attached to you in that time I felt like I'd had you my whole life. You were such a comfort to me, Dan and Kevin when we lost mom. I think I became even closer to you because you lived in our bedroom all the time, with your own food, water and litter box, because you didn't like the other cats in our house. You were OK with the dog??? but not the other cats! What's up with that? But you were such a "people cat". I am so grateful to Rhonda from the shelter, who loaned us Dottie Ruth to spend mom's last days with her. Naturally, I couldn't let her go back to the shelter because she meant so much to all of us. Even though she was with us such a short time I am very glad that she was in our lives. She gave us so much love, and beautiful memories. Dottie Ruth, you will never be forgotten. Our family's love will always be with you, wherever you are. Rest in peace and love, Dottie. Mommy and Daddy miss and love you always.

A letter to Chai

2009-10-21T02:26:22Z

My sweet little angel that was sent to me twelve years ago from Japan. I had know idea when I was asked to foster you, until we could found you a home, that it was I who needed rescuing. Chai, my fiesty, shiba-inu who traveled a fourteen hour flight to Los Amgeles... to come into my life. You were my little guardian angel who protected and cared for me through all of lifes challenges. You healed my broken hearts, made me laugh , you made me cry, and you never left my side especally if I was sick,sad or scared . I always felt safe knowing that you would be home waiting for me and your goofy smile... made my heart dance. We had each other and we didn't need anyone else. Words can not describe how grateful I am for all of the flourishing love, protection and commitment you gave to me for so many years.

I know the last six months was extremely painful and uncomfortable because your body was old and in pain. I also know that you stayed as long as you possibly could for me...Thank you. I'm sorry that you were uncofortable and in pain and kept hanging on just to make sure I would be alright. I tried as much as I could to ease your suffering and I'm sorry I didn't know there was a tumor.

I am sad and miss you soooooo very much, but please know that you are in my heart, and soul everyday.You were my friend, my little boy, my companion and my souls keeper. I will love you for as long as I live and I hope you come rushing to greet me one day when it's my time to pass on., I can't wait to be greeted by your stinky breath, wet kisses ,and your beautiful big smile. and I will soak you up like the sun and I will never let you go.
'

My sweet Chai- Chai I want you to run in the grass, roll in the sand, play with Woo, Max,Chester and Razzle. Eat as much chicken, steak and lamb bones your little heart desires.

You truly were a gift from God and I'm the luckiest woman to have been chosen to be your human..

A letter to Leda

2009-10-19T15:44:38Z

You were my little gray angel, the light in my life, and even until your last days at 18 1/2, all the world was your playground. Among your sisters, you were always the one to have fun.

You slept with me every night, greeted me at the door everyday, with your kitty smile, and sat on the bathroom counter every morning while I got ready. You followed me everywhere. You were a joyful spirit.

The vet and the techs did their best, but you were ready to go. Your dad and I miss you with all our hearts, but you are now with Amalthea, Miranda, Chiva, and Sancho, and your other sisters, Ariel and Molly are here with us.

A letter to Sofee

2009-10-12T07:52:23Z

I'm sorry I cried like I did when I last saw you. I knew you were still with me, but holding your lifeless body that last time at emergency vet was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I only knew you two short years. The day I saw you at the shelter I knew you were supposed to be with me; I wouldn't change a thing, even if I knew I would feel completely empty after you were gone. I didn't know the vaccine was going to take your feisty little life from me; I didn't know life was that fragile. Never again.

I hope you know how special your life here as Sofee was.

No one ever thought I would adopt a Pomeranian. They were used to seeing me with "tough" dogs, but they didn't know how tough you were! I don't know how many people you made scream as your tiny 3-pound body came leaping out of my jacket, teeth bared. You made me laugh every day, Sofee. You should know that. I try to laugh now, but it's hard. It's been almost three years and I still see your little black body everywhere I go. Do you come visit us Sofee? Is that you? Do you ever sit and watch me leaf through the few pictures I took of you, knowing I took you for granted? Do you think it's silly that I'm still so sad over you? I wonder, what it's like, death.

You saw me through a couple very difficult years. You taught me many lessons about love, trust and finally just letting go of your past. You did that SoSo, and I try every day, but it's all I can do sometimes.

I feel cheated, like I should have had you longer than I did. I know you're in heaven with Amerk, and I know you will watch over him and wait for me together. Tell him I love him, I know he knows.

Somewhere over the rainbow. See you soon.

A letter to Pablo

2009-10-04T19:06:10Z

I am sorry I wasnt there to save you from whoever hurt you. I am sorry that our neighbor wasnt concerned enough to knock on our door while you laid dying in their yard. I am sorry I wasnt there to be with you when you faded.
I think of you all the time, and Carmelita misses you. You're my luv, my boy, my son.

A letter to Ozzie

2009-10-01T16:36:45Z

It would have been your 7th birthday. The house and toys are quiet without you. It's been a year but not a day goes by without a thought of you. I miss you little guy, you were my companion without a doubt. I hope you are at peace now.

A letter to "Big Girl" (Our Gilly)

2009-09-29T16:02:53Z

Sigh. It's wierd to come to a house nearly free of white dog hair, although it keeps cropping up. It's wierd to come home and not see you there, in the center of the house, where you could quietly keep an eye out the front window, the back window. We talk about how you were, still are, such a presence in you big, quiet, polar head-hug way.

Miss you, Big Girl.

A letter to Dolly

2009-09-16T19:17:55Z

I will never forget you. You were so neurotic after the distemper, but we all loved you so much. Hope you are ok, wherever you are.

A letter to Gilly

2009-09-16T16:02:26Z

I miss your big white self-contained you.

A letter to Oz

2009-09-04T12:16:33Z

Like the other cats who have come into our family over the years, you chose us in your time of need. When your dad -- my brother -- first met you, you were badly hurt and in need of love. What a blessing you have been to all of us. Our first native Tucsonan family member! You were with us for over thirteen years and watched our family take root here in the desert and evolve. There are many memories. Some things I loved most about you:

You quickly learned that the Discorfano family is a loud bunch, your typical effusive Italian clan -- and you fit in right away. You were the most vocal cat I've ever met. I remember one time I was talking to Grandpa on the phone and he said, "Wait... here's Oz.... say hello to Oz!" And then I heard a long and loud meow into the phone. Another time, I was standing in front of the refrigerator and I felt a tap on my shoulder: not only were you using your paw to get my attention, but you also meowed with great gusto to express your desire for a treat. Another Oz-ism I'll miss is your penchant for hiding yourself away inside the kitchen cabinets. How cute it was when I'd open up a cabinet to get a pot or a container and see those beautiful blue eyes staring at me while you were sitting pretty. Of course, another meow, just to say hello to me.

Grandpa loves strawberries so much that he says in heaven strawberries are always in season. It's appropriate that, above all else, it was the smell of strawberries that threw you into a fit of ecstasy! If someone left strawberries on the counter, they almost always wound up on the floor because you couldn't resist playing with the container. And if someone left an empty grocery bag on the countertop that had carried strawberries in it, you would find a way to roll around on top of the bag, blissful as you enveloped yourself in the lingering aroma.

We're going to miss you. But I imagine you, right now, rolling around in a big strawberry patch. I hope you've reunited with Oreo and that, by now, you've introduced the beloved family dog of my youth to your cousin Pushkin. I hope the three of you are having a good day in heaven together.

A letter to Pushkin

2009-02-25T00:00:00Z

A long pause after just writing out your name. I'm sitting here, with paper and pen in hand and thinking that there is so much to say, multiple lifetimes worth of thoughts and feelings. I won't even try to say it all here -- not in one letter or in forty. But I thought writing some letters to you would be a nice way to spend some time visiting with you now. I'm so used to having you right here. I honestly can say that not for one moment did I ever take you for granted; but I'd forgotten what it was like to live in a world without you, a world without you physically present in it. Although there were a few times during our lifetime together when we were physically apart for a stretch of time -- a vacation, a semester -- this is an altogether different experience because of the finality of it, and there's no way I could have ever fully anticipated what your absence would be like and the feelings that I'm now having to endure throughout my waking hours.

I've been looking for you now for over three weeks, since your passing on the morning of February 1st. I've been left completely unsatisfied with any mystical or metaphysical explanation of where you've gone, or how you're still with me. Without dwelling on the obvious depressing aspects, I'm certain that I will, each day for the rest of my days, continue looking... and hoping. As much as I loved your little beagle body (that gave you so much trouble sometimes), I will not need it to recognize you when our day of reunion comes.

I'll try to keep these letters meaningful and brief; my mind is rambling these days, but I'll do my best not to digress on these pages too often. So let me stay specific. I want to share with you something that happened today. I went to mass today at noon because it's Ash Wednesday. You don't have to be particularly religious to appreciate Ash Wednesday: it's simply a reminder that we all are here on the planet, in these bodies, for a finite period of time. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Regardless of one's personal beliefs about life or the hereafter, none of us can argue with the fact that our bodies eventually come to their end. A universal, inescapable part of life. This is the first Ash Wednesday, however, when I'm feeling the full blow of death's reality. Before you, I'd experienced death mostly second-hand -- friends of friends, headlines in the news, or in the guise of characters in a novel or film.

During the mass, I went to reach for the offertory basket being passed around from pew to pew. I reached to a man who was sitting in front of me. I'd noticed this young man when he first came into the church before the service began; he moved awkwardly, evidently suffering from some kind of palsy. But as I reached for the basket, he motioned further down his own pew, where the basket needed to be passed before making its way to our row behind him. I realized my mistake and apologized quietly for so anxiously jumping the gun. I've just started this month attending a weekly service again, and I'm still not quite familiar with the way things work in this particular church. The last time I attended a church on Sundays with some degree of consistency was back in New York, years ago. I'm still feeling a bit like an outsider, which keeps me more watchful and less relaxed than I would be if I were a regular there.

The parishioners in this man's row were a ways down from where we were sitting, so he stood up and walked the basket to within arm's reach of them. As he did this, hardly self-conscious while moving in his slow uneven steps, he smiled at me and then whispered one word: "Patience." And I thought immediately to myself that God or you (or both) was sending me a message. But what exactly about patience? What am I supposed to have patience about? Patience because grief subsides? Because, over time, I will get better at living without you? That, eventually, I'll be able to feel genuine happiness again? Patience to wait for the day, at my own moment of death, when all the mysteries surrounding life and death will be revealed? Patience to wait for the day when you and I will be together again? Patience with myself as I try to make sense of this in a way I can live with until that time comes? I confess that I'm feeling very, very impatient. I don't want to be without you for even one more minute.

Something else: Watching this young man struggling to move his legs reminded me of the times when, in those last few months, you would still want to go for walks even though you were having trouble coordinating your stiff hind legs. I could see you working so hard at it. You loved life so much, despite your illnesses and difficulties; sometimes, I think, your challenges made you all the more adamant about living life and soaking it all up. How many times you stood up and showed up for the day, when I know that a weaker spirit would have given up! I envy you that enthusiasm for life, your absolute love of life -- and I feel almost guilty now as I write this, because I'm thinking the whole time I'm writing I didn't sign up for this. I don't want this. I am, of course, still keenly aware of all the blessings in my life. And your two brothers are my greatest comfort and inspiration now; I know it's my job to keep on loving them and protecting them, and I'm so grateful for that. During this first month, they have been the main reason I've gotten out of bed in the mornings. So I appreciate all that is still good in my life; and yet there are moments when I think to myself what I wouldn't give to be able to transcend all of this and get to wherever you are now.

I can be very patient with others, especially when I'm assuming the role of teacher in one setting or another. That said, my lack of patience -- whether it's with circumstances or with myself, or with someone else who happens in my day -- is definitely something I need to work on in this lifetime. I already knew this about myself before I lost you. Of course, I had no idea that the lesson on patience coming my way would be of such a formidable magnitude. I have enough trouble waiting out the small stuff. Now, through your death, you are teaching me more about patience than all the other life lessons thus far combined. Every moment, every breath I take each day, for the rest of my days -- a test of patience that I have no choice but to endure.

As I keep looking and hoping.