I recently listened to a friend give a post-mortem on ending a business relationship he’d worked on developing for quite some time.

As we were talking, we got into observing some life lessons and out of nowhere I realized that one particular lesson has continued to hold disproportionate weight in my life — that people don’t change. Or put a different way: you can’t change people.

Now of course it’s possible that people can change: perhaps slightly, or in a way that becomes suitable or compromise-able, but my personal experience always seems to be that such a relationship is unsustainable in the long run. In particular this is difficult for me because I tend to be extremely loyal and put a ton of effort into relationships of all sorts — I like to make things work.

That said, whenever I have compromised my own beliefs, or convinced myself that just ‘giving someone time’ would result in the change I was looking for, I’ve been wrong.

So what’s my takeaway? I don’t know; I guess I need to trust my gut more often and be willing to make hard calls earlier, whether in hiring, dating or friendship.

One of my former consulting clients turned me onto Richard Feynman several months ago. This series of short interviews with him  is one of my favorites.

I’m back!

In 2009 I wrote a post about why I thought Facebook was going to be HUGE (like Bible huge) by noting that Facebook was the most searched for term on the web.

Well it’s 2012 and now I am super impressed with Quora. No, it’s not a Facebook scale company in the making — but here is why I believe it’s disruptive. Quora is a brand that stands for the best answer.

Now I am biased because I work in tech and have a disproportionate number of questions and information I seek that relates to the type of information Quora caters to. That said, in at least 30-40% of my Google searches I now append the word “quora” at the end.

Example: Mother’s day is coming up and we’re planning on a dinner in New Haven. I went to Google and searched:

best restaurants new haven quora

BAM: http://www.quora.com/What-are-good-restaurants-in-New-Haven-CT

Simple. Successful. I am guaranteed that the top answer is non-SEO’d bullshit and I get the added benefit that many Quora users have tastes similar to my own.

I’d also note that I much prefer searching for Quora answers using Google than with Quora’s own search engine. In fact, if I were Quora, I’d focus on getting more people to search the way I do rather than using Quora as a portal in and of itself.

If you simply read the headlines, you’d think that the economy — or at least spending by the average consumer — is on the comeback:

Thanksgiving Day saw an 18% increase in online spending to $479 million.

U.S. consumers have spent $12.7 billion already in the first 25 days of the November to December 2011 holiday season, up 15% from the corresponding days last year.

Sounds good, until you remember that the income gap is real and the average consumer doesn’t matter so much in the broader context:

When discussing “the consumer,” it is important to remember that in reality, “the consumer” is the top 20% of income earners and then everybody else. The top 20% of income earners (who own about 80-90% of the equity market) account for about 40-45% of all spending in the economy.

via Business Insider and TechCrunch

During my weekend readings I came across two snippets that present an interesting take on what the future of work holds. I’m fascinated by the future of work and I’m glad to see some refreshingly unique perspectives on what to expect in terms of evolution…

First Kevin Kelly on why ‘productivity’ is a worthless metric to be optimizing for:

There is more to be gained by producing more opportunities than by optimizing existing ones.

Productivity, however, is exactly the wrong thing to care about in the new economy.

The problem with trying to measure productivity is that it measures only how well people can do the wrong jobs. Any job that can be measured for productivity probably should be eliminated from the list of jobs that people do.

In the coming era, doing the exactly right next thing is far more fruitful than doing the same thing twice.

Next, Ben Casnocha via Arnold Kling on why ‘hard-to-define’ jobs may be a sign of job security:

Generally, the harder it is to explain to someone you’ve just met at a cocktail party what it is you do on a day to day basis, the more interesting the work you’re engaged in.

Arnold Kling applies a related rule of thumb to job security:

A job seeker is looking for… a well-defined job. But the trend seems to be that if a job can be defined, it can be automated or outsourced.

The marginal product of people who need well-defined jobs is declining. The marginal product of people who can thrive in less structured environments is increasing.

This summer while booking my trip to Europe I noticed something I hadn’t seen before across a number of hotel aggregator sites: the use of real-time notifications to ‘let you know’ who is also looking at the same hotel and when the last room booked was.

I’m not exactly what I think about this tactic as a consumer, but I’m sure it’s effective for sellers.

Having the constant pop-ups is a similar feeling to being in a bricks and mortar store where you’re ‘considering buying a shirt,’ but have put it back on the rack. Someone else walks up and starts looking at the same shirt! It’s both a validation (that you had a good eye) and a major source of pressure —  now that other person might now take the shirt and leave you high and dry!

Anyway it’s interesting to see the web evolve, especially e-commerce as it tries to replicate more tactics from the offline world. These real time notifications strike me as a really different approach and one that is likely to spread to other verticals outside of hotels very soon.

To see for yourself, surf around on Booking.com and click through several hotels where they are showing limited inventory.

Image above is for a London hotel via Booking.com.

Can you consider these startups ‘missed opportunities,’ or did they only come into being because the founder(s) left to work on something outside corporate walls?…

Click image for full-size

Some notes following an awesome two week vacation to Spain (Barcelona, Rioja, San Sebastian and Bilbao) and London:

• The number of nice cars in London is outrageous
• Eating Pinxtos in San Sebastian is the best. Question: why does this style of restaurant not work in a City like New York? Health code?
• Food prices in Spain are very reasonable; great place for a culinary trip
• A good concierge/bell hop can make a trip (especially if you didn’t have time for pre-trip internet research)
• Ironically we also had an Airbnb mishap: Despite excellent customer service, I’m not sure if I would trust it internationally again. A trust network is definitely needed (startup idea?)
• It’s funny that wifi is less expensive (or free) the cheaper the place you stay
• The new Travel Pro rolling bag I bought six months ago is my favorite purchase of the year so far. Amazing.
• It’s great to have free museums (DC/London) but the crowds are insane. No museum should allow photos simply because it eccacerbates the above issue as everyone tries to do posed pictures creating back-up and frustrated tourists
• Foursquare really needs to improve its explore functionality!
• Foursquare is annoying when traveling internationally because you can’t check-in while offline – wish I could download on offline map/venue list
• It’s difficult to find international stamps

WHAT PERCENTAGE OF SEARCH QUERIES ARE…

All information compiled/taken from Quora answers