In the interest of not clouding the internet with duplicate content, I will point you towards a review I wrote about the book “The first Five Pages” by Noah Lukeman. Because Lukeman has been an agent and in the industry a long time, there are jewels of wisdom that no author (wanting to get published) should ignore. BEFORE you send out an queries, read this book.

Even though it is geared more towards fiction authors the lessons are more general practice and ones memoir writers can make sure the heed. When a resource like this is published, it’s kind of silly not read it — especially when it can help your memoir stay out of the rejection pile!

The First Five Pages: A Writer’s Guide To Staying Out of the Rejection Pile

Resources: Official Page for Noah Lukeman, The First Five Pages — A Review

Incoming search terms:

• how to write a memoire noah lukeman
• top books for memoir writers first five pages

It’s a new year! With it, we all have goals or resolutions we make and try to reach or stick with. As an aspiring memoirist, we need to prioritize our memoir writing.

Think about it — during the 2009 – 2010 television season, almost half (9) of the top twenty shows on TV were reality based. That tells us that there is, most definitely, an audience for our memoirs. True stories can be as captivating, if not more, as any fiction work.

This year, 2012, make a commitment to yourself and your memoir. Set aside time each day to write. It can be as little as 15 minutes or as long as you want. If daily is too much with your schedule, choose a time once or twice a week and stick with it.

As William Zinsser says, it adds up quicker than you think. Don’t worry about re-reading or editing right now. Just get in a habit of writing. You may use all of it, none of it, some of it — it doesn’t matter. You have to get used to using your writing muscles!

Happy new year everyone! Let’s make this a wonderful, writing year!

Mandee

It was New Year’s Eve afternoon and we were moving the last of the items from mom’s old house to the new one. Mom, hubby, brother-in-law, Tony, nephew and my sister Debbie and I were all helping. At some point Deb disappeared. She had knee replacement surgery a few months back so I usually try to keep an eye on her to make sure she’s not over doing it.

After not seeing her for about 15 minutes, I decided to walk into the house to see if she was there. I noticed the bathroom light was on through the frosted window leading to the back porch. Good, I thought. There she is. I messed around a few minutes, walking through the empty house making sure it was truley empty.

She still hadn’t come out. I knew something was wrong — just like before. I walked to the bathroom door and knocked. No response. I knocked again and called “Debbie?”

No response. I was feeling the now familiar wave of fear building in my stomach. I began banging on the door and yelling to her all at the same time. I stopped to listen for a reply. A very weak voice said “Yeah”.

That’s all I needed. I ran outside and screamed at Tony “Come quick, something is wrong with Deb”.

He dropped the box he was carrying and his 6″6″ frame had him inside the back door in seconds. I heard him try the door and then break it like I would snap a pencil. I followed him into the bathroom.

Debbie was on the floor. Her eyes were completely glazed over. She was looking at us but I don’t think she was seeing us. Mom came in behind me and called 911 on her cell phone.

Turns out her potassium level was critically low. Today, they are still not sure why but at least they have ruled out stroke, aneurysm and blood clot. She is going to the neurologist for some more tests to get to the bottom. She’s at home resting with her husband and son with virtually no memory of the episode — only the 2 1/2 days in the hospital that followed.

For me, it was too familiar a feeling, circumstance. Mom was in the bathroom too. Mom had the same empty stare and darting eyes. I’m glad I found her when I did but I could have gone the rest of my life without another episode like this.

Thank goodness, in both cases, they are doing well.

What a way to end 2011.

Memoir prompts can come from everywhere during this season. Keep a small notebook with you at all times — in your purse, jacket or shirt pocket. You need to jot down the memories as they come. The holidays can (and most likely will) bring back a flood of memories.

The memory is stimulated by the things around us. The smell of cookies baking or the fresh pine tree, the sounds of bells ringing or your favorite Christmas carol, the site of your family and friends gathered round drinking eggnog and telling stories — all of these stimuli are bound to ignite the memory and possibly supply material for your memoir.

Be ready! Have a notebook or piece of paper handy so you can write down some keywords to remind you of that memory later, when you are ready to write.

Otherwise, enjoy your holiday celebrations. Look forward to the new year and a resolve to work on your memoir(s).

Happy Holidays and Bless us Everyone!

Mandee

Incoming search terms:

• memoirs about holidays
• write story about during the holidays

I re-read a couple of my favorite Memoir How To books. They helped a bit but I was still not certain where to go from here. I was thinking I might have to scrap it all and start over. Major depressive thought there. So, while I was perusing the internet this afternoon, I ran across an article published in Reader’s Digest by Joe Kita in January, 2009. It was titled “How to Write Your Memoir“. Rather than repeat it all here, visit the link for yourself. It won’t take long to read.

It was a short, two page article. As I sat here drinking my Coke and reading, the block began to wear down. I know I have said it a bunch of times on this blog, but we all have stories to tell and they are important. This article reminded me of my own words of encouragement to others. I just needed someone to say it to me.

The article had advice from published authors, small excerpts from other people’s memoirs, lots of tips, a few pats on the back and encouraging words. I loved it.

I am happy to say, I am back at it. My story will never be the great American memoir novel — but, as Joe points out — as I write it, I begin to make sense of things in my life, why I turned out as I did, why I feel a certain way about a certain subject. I get to know myself — that’s the huge payoff in memoir. ;D

Mandee 

Incoming search terms:

• writer block examples

Descriptive Writing

When talking about descriptive writing, it doesn’t mean quantity of details described in a scene but rather, describing the details that are important to your story — moving it along. You could spend a chapter describing great-aunt Matilda’s living room that one Thanksgiving day — down to the pee-pee mark the dog left on the white carpet. Just because it happened and it’s true doesn’t mean it has to be included if it’s not important to the story. Truth for the sake of truth will not endear you to your readers.

“It’s the truth and/or an undeniable fact!” some would say.

Ahhh, but is it important to the story — does it keep things moving along?

Think about yourself as a reader for a moment. Would you read page after page of beautiful, descriptive prose if it’s not important to the theme, plot or story arc? Likely, you would end up falling asleep in your reading chair or losing interest after yet another detailed furniture piece description.

 Editing Your Life

When you begin writing, just write. It’s important to get it all down so that you have a first draft. Then, go back and you can start to get a sense of your story, what’s important, what’s not, is there a theme? You don’t and probably won’t have to have all these answers up front. Just write.

After you have a complete first draft, you can go back and begin to edit. Choosing what to keep and what to give up in your story can seem hard at first. Everything happened (the truth) but is it important enough to include in your final version?

Think of a joke — yes a joke. It has a beginning, middle and end referred to as the opening, the set up and the punch line. See the correlation? Jokes are usually short so the comedian won’t lose his audience before the punchline finish and the laughter. They have to stay on track and the details included are all important to the end or the punchline — to illicit the all important laugh.

So you sit down to re-read your first draft. You come to a scene that took place at a department store. You have included all the details. But, are all the details included important to the story?

Is it important that the clerk’s name was Sally? If not, leave it out.

Is it important that the lady in front of you was wearing a pink and purple dotted dress? If so, leave it in.

If it’s fluff that adds nothing to the overall story, remove it. It doesn’t matter that it happened — it’s the truth. You will quickly lose a reader in a book or essay that is filled with fluff details that have nothing to do with your theme or story arc.

Now, start writing! You can’t edit what you haven’t written!

Incoming search terms:

• why its important telling truth in writing and in life
• why its important to tell the truth in writing and in life
• writing pencil

Having said that, remember, just because it is important to you doesn’t mean it will be to others. So, you have to make a decision — Who is your audience?  Are you writing to chronicle the events of your life (for family and friends), for therapy or staying sane or are you writing a story you a looking to be published. There is a big difference between the audiences.

Writing Your Story for Yourself (or family)

Write about your first love, how you met your spouse, your time spent in the military, your professional career, your favorite pet or any number of other events or time periods in your life. These are the little stories that make up your life and are important to you and your family and close friends. Generations from now can get to know you through your own voice and experiences. This is worth writing for alone.

Writing for Publication

Writing for the mainstream publication world (or to self-publish and promote) entails a lot of differences. The stories themselves have to be intriguing, interesting the the general public. Look at the some of the books that made it in the mainstream and learn from them. They are focused, about one specific event or time period, are written like a fiction novel including dialog, detailed scenes and “showing” the reader, not telling. (Although, in the memoir genre you can do both.)

Memoir Writing Resources

If you are serious about your writing, learn from those that teach. I have found a plethora of teachers/writers blogs since I started on this adventure of writing memoir. Read what they write, apply it and your writing will be much better.

Do you have to have an MFA, be a professor of English or a journalist to write memoir? No. anyone can learn — it’s the passion that can’t be taught.

Are you qualified to write about your life? Yes!

With that said, below is a list of sites I have found helpful in learning about writing, prompts, techniques and all sorts of tidbits that can assist on this road to memoir. Maybe you’ll write a memoir about writing a memoir — who knows?

• Lisa Romeo has an MFA in creative non-fiction (memoir genre), is a writer and a teacher. She hosts a blog titled Lisa Romeo Writes where she imparts her wisdom, has sign-ups for classes and much more. I can highly recommend her blog as a great resource to budding memoirists.
• Lynette Bennett is another great teacher. She coaches writers, edits manuscripts and has a wonderful blog, Lynette Bennet Writing,  full of writing tips in addition to teaching all over the Boston area. Check her blog out!
• Another person I would like to mention is not a teacher but a writer. She has a way with words and just reading her posts gives you the perfect example of “showing” in writing. Victoria Flynn is a wonderful writer and my online buddy. Have a gander at one of her blogs — Penny Jar | Memoir.
• Extreme Writing Now is a website for writers. Alex Crabtree hosts the site and encourages writers of all genres to join in the free community. Whether it’s memoir, flash fiction, poetry or even article writing, EWN is the place for writers.

There are a ton of other people and sites to check out if you, like me, want to verse yourself on writing memoir. I will be adding a new resource list each Monday morning. Enjoy!

Keep Writing,
Mandee

Okay, a couple of facts here…

• Memoir writing is based on writing from memory
• Memory is subjective.

Think of it this way…

Two People – Two Stories

Fear and the Memoir

Incoming search terms:

• truth telling in writing and in life
• about telling the truth in writing
• where to post my memoir
• true life memoir stories
• telling truth writing

I was alone in the house so I turned the TV to the channel that plays solid gold oldies and set about cleaning. I hummed along at first to tunes I remember my mother playing as she cleaned house while I was growing up. I had flashes of memories of my aunt and my grandmother doing the same thing. It always started out as humming but ended up as a dance and singing fest!

I remembered mom and Auntie cocking their hips up and down to the beat of “Jailhouse Rock”

Folding clothes and singing for all they were worth to “Run Around Sue”

Mamaw holding court in the living room singing her heart out as she played the electric guitar

Christmas Eve and all us kids dancing and singing around the living room — performing as my mom saved it for posterity on her movie camera

Ahhh, yes… the memories…

Soon I realized I was singing at the top of my lungs, jigging and wiggling around the rooms as I dusted. Before I knew it, I was finished dusting — everything. I don’t even really remember dusting — just reliving my memory flashes with the start of each song.

I was smiling too.

These little flashes can turn into essays and the essays, collectively, can turn into a book one day. The next time you are getting ready to do a chore — turn o some old music. It’s great stimuli for the memory banks!

Incoming search terms:

• adds stimulating memories
• christmas memoir
• creative christmas eve memoirs
• memory stimulating song
• music memories in memoir writing

Three Word Sentence Memoir Exercise

Abigail  Thomas, a published fiction and non-fiction writer teaches writing classes. One of the first exercises, a memoir prompt really, the first week is to help them define what to write about.

She tells them to take any 10 years in their life and reduce it to two pages of three word sentences — only three word sentences. She says that you quickly discover you can’t hide in three word sentences. It helps nail the story, what’s important and what isn’t — what should be included, what shouldn’t.

This is a challenging exercise but helped me focus on my memoir. You should give it a try.

Abigail has a book out called Thinking About Memoir. I order mine. You?

Incoming search terms:

• memoir exercises
• fiction what to leave out
• what can you leave out of a memoir
• what to leave out of a memoir?
• writing leave out i think