Life @ the Hoover Household

First day. Give a teacher a chance.

2018-08-29T11:10:00.000-05:00

Some times i wish i could hit the pause button on how fast they are growing up.
So proud that they are starting 2nd, fourth and 7th grade.
This year finds J at the Jr. High not but 2 blocks from where we live. He is terrified of this new adventure.
He needs to know he's not alone.

D started 4th grade in a functional academic classroom with 4 other kids. I pray this year is better than the last ones.

S started 2nd grade and has started dyslexia therapy at school.
She was identified by the school after running a full initial evaluation after I asked for one in writing. She has a 504 because Texas won't recognize dyslexia as the learning disability it is. We were told she was too intelligent to need special education services.
Word to educators: if parents come to you and state there's an issue... Do us all a favor and dig into it. You'll find often times there is a problem.
The teachers could do nothing but complain about handwriting and reading issues.
I do not want to waste time our your energy on things that are trivial.
Yes, it goes against what your district and campus admins say about us parents.
Honestly, I'm your biggest supporter although i am THAT parent when necessary.
It's really not you making decisions about kids in your classroom not receiving the help they need. Often times in my experience it comes down to either a campus admin or someone from the head office.
I've experienced teachers who speak out for their kids at IEP meetings get shunned... Shouted at and threatened.
This doesn't help anyone but the district save money by not helping the kid. It hurts the teacher in the classroom. She can't help the student. Even if it's help in something basic like communicating needs.
Teacher you deserve my blessing in the beginning of the year.
Not all teachers are evil. Not all wear halos either. They are humans... A few are wonderful and they earn it with every kid.

Go bless your teacher and give your support.

2017-09-22T10:53:00.000-05:00

Sarah at Blue Bell Ice cream factory in Brenham, TX (20 mins away from camp)

Because cow statues need hugs!

Texas Neurofibromatosis Foundation Family Camp held at Camp 4 all in Burton, TX (Washington County) . 1 hour from Austin and 1 hour from Houston.

wildlife at camp

Campfire fun

Sarah on a horse, of course

Daniel obsessing over animals

Because Jonathan was licked by a horse Daniel had to try.

Jonathan Braving the Giant swing. This was a big year for him conquering his own fears.

Sarah Making new friends!! Sweetest kids ever!

Seeing our heroes and friends alike

Fishing

2016-09-15T10:46:00.001-05:00

The Hoover family, The Darsey Family and Michelle and her daughter and Cindy Hahn from Texas NF Foundation

I know a Fighter. His name is Jonathan, and he is a super hero in my book. He has Neurofibromatosis type 1. Go Here for more info on NF.

But Even Super Heroes keep their pain concealed. Yesterday, I went to have lunch with him as a special treat for him. I just came out and asked him if he was in pain. He said yes. I asked him when this started hurting he said that it was all the time and especially at school when his class is playing kickball, soccer and the kids are way beyond his ability in the way they play.

Now, this year he has a card that says Need a break. He can use this at any time, although he hasn't because he felt that he was going to be punished for using it too much, and that he felt that would open himself up to bullies. By punished he meant he was going to be sent to the office, and suspended and sent to the alternative school kind of punished. I encouraged him to use his cards so his body can not hurt so much.

I will now be getting him seen back at the NF Clinic because of this revelation. Don't know and can't promise that the pain will go away. There currently is no treatment for NF and definitely no cure. That's why research done by The Children's Tumor Foundation is so vitally important. So is getting support and advocacy while we learn of what Jonathan's NF is morphing into, and what his current needs are. There are a lot school issues with learning disabilities and attention issues that we are battling with associated with his NF. This is very common for NF.

This weekend we went to Texas NF Family Camp in Burton, Texas at Camp For all. This was a crazy great opportunity for our family to learn more about NF, meet other families with this, and get support and make some friends with some of the biggest Warrior moms, who quite frankly have been to hell and back many times dragging the devil back behind their cars on the freeway, home from the schools, hospitals and clinic appointments.

4 Things Jonathan and I learned.

1.We are now not ever alone in living with his NF. This had me crying on the way back home from camp. it was crazy bittersweet. We had never met anyone with NF... so we had a lot of questions. Thank you to those who put up with our questions. I didn't know NF can be progressive.

2. He met a bunch of adults that have NF and they aren't afraid to talk about NF. In fact he met a few that go and advocate for NF and talk to a lot of people. Reggie Bibbs is definitely in his top 3 for heroes.... and top 2 for me. This also did take our fears and put them to rest.

3. Friends are easier to make when the fear of being judged for what his abilities are or aren't , are removed. He made several friends and we are going to make sure he has every opportunity to grow these friendships. I also can't wait for the next event to get to know more of the local families.

4. Fears are better faced as a family and as a group. This was never so obvious to me as when we went to the Giant swing.... The first picture there is a rope attached to the harness which is attached to the swing. It's safe. But when they want to get pulled back other people go and hold it like they're playing tug o war.... this was also very obvious at the zip line tower and at horse back riding. And if anyone wants to know EVERYONE in my group including me rode a horse. I may have had a couple of panic attacks trying to get on the horse but eventually it was awesome. Kudos to the guy who led me on the trail. and let Sarah ride backwards on a horse.

Be very Blessed, Trina

A very California Family wedding.Trip of a lifetime.

2015-12-30T23:25:00.000-06:00

I'm sorry that it's taken me a month since Jonathan and I went on a trip to California.
I hadn't been to California in so long to visit family that I cannot even guess the year we went. I'm guessing 2004 (on the very outside it could have been 2003).
The last time we were in California a friend of ours named Alfonso was getting married.

After a while of constantly dealing with the ongoing drama with Daniel's school, and just life in general wit a new set of Autism spectrum disorder diagnoses for not only Daniel but Jonathan as well... Andrew made the executive decision to send both Jonathan and I out to visit our family. I needed a break.. There was a very special person in my life that was also getting married.
My niece, Riyen got married to an awesome guy named Garth. They had known each other for a long time...
That and she's almost 23. Kinda doesn't feel that way. It seems like yesterday that she cried at my wedding. like. Ugly cry. but only because she was happy. (but as a disclaimer all the women in my family cry at everything). I cried at the last school assembly I went to with Jonathan.

Jonathan playing in the same backyard I practically grew up in. Couldn't get him inside even when it was freezing.

Jonathan seeing and experiencing the ocean for the first time. And loving it.

Ended up soaked from head to toe but it was TOTALLY worth it.

My Good friend Darlene... whom I love very much.

We spent the morning with Andrew's side of the family. We took over a whole corner of a Diner in Watsonville.

Pictured from L to R (because I totally hate looking at people's photos not knowing who I'm looking at)

Me, Diana (Andrew's sister,Roslyn (Brother Walter's Significant other) Becky (Andrew's Mom) and Walter (Andrew's Brother)... Most of THESE pictures were taken by Jonathan.

Andrew's Dad named David (grandpa) and Diana.

Roslyn's daughter and our niece Brooke (Jonathan's Cousin)

Lee (our niece and Jonathan's cousin)

Diana... whom if you took a poll at my house they want her to visit way more. or we may have to go see her... hmmm

Jonathan looks good dressed up for the wedding. Too bad it was slightly above freezing. At least it wasn't raining.

There was a playground at the park Riyen got married at. Christmas hill park is also home to the world famous Gilroy Garlic festival.

Bored because Cousin Ruben made us leave at 1 pm and the wedding was at 3:30. Cold because when we left Texas it was 70... and here we were freezing because it was 40. Totally had forgotten about winter in California. like totally.

Time for a beautiful wedding.

don't know anyone else here besides Emma (my niece and Jonathan's Cousin) in the yellowish gold dress and the Bride Riyen. Love everyone's expressions. Priceless.

You may kiss your wife Garth,

Cutting the cake but notice Jonathan is in the picture. My sister and Riyen's Mom Eryn, That is an entire post I can't wait to share. Friend Sally and my Aunt Diane is in this picture.

The day after the wedding we went to San Juan Bautista and walked around the Mission... Found out my aunt and uncle were married there.

Pretending to be a civil war re enactor... because they do that there some week ends.

My Aunt Diane who means the world to us and my Sister Eryn. So glad I got to spend some quality time with you both. Thank you for your love and warm hospitality. We stayed at my aunt's house.

At the airport in Oakland after driving for 2 hours from Hollister, California.

During this trip I really got a chance to reconnect with Jonathan. He's a really great kid who sometimes tries too hard to please everyone. He's sweet and he has a great sense of humor. He is also a super Google Navigator. Next time we go ANYWHERE I'm giving him the phone and say get us there.

He also sleeps sideways and loves playing in a backyard.

I totally needed this trip not only to go to this wedding, but for the break it forced me to take.

Upon returning it took me about a week to fully realize that the filter that I had been viewing life with my kids was gone. Suddenly I was viewing life wit Daniel and Jonathan and Sarah in all of it's glory. The Good, the bad and the UGLY. Still beautiful, just like anyone else we have bad days. A LOT of them.

What normally happens after a bad day is we debrief and evaluate what happened and what could have possibly triggered the bad day. we also put the day away and never speak of it again.

The day after we got back was terrible and ended up with a panicked phone cal from school, saying come.

I'm just thankful I was able to be granted the break and eventually my filter came back, but it was slightly different.

We are still working the Individual Education Plan through the IDEA 2004 Process with the school. We are by no means ever going to be done. Our ARD meetings take all day and there is no more room in that conference room. We now have to trust an advocate and a lawyer to do our advocating for our kids and that is the absolute hardest thing ever for me to do. It hurts.

He has so far since the start of school been restrained (with documentation) 6 times. He has been secluded 0 times and suspended 0 times. This is a big change we are grateful for.

But Love wins out.

Be Blessed and have a Happy New Year

Christmas 2015

2015-12-24T20:29:00.001-06:00

Merry Christmas from our family to yours.

Be blessed.

Trina, Andrew,J,D and Sarah.

First Day of a new School year

2015-08-28T09:03:00.001-05:00

Day 1: This is the beginning of another chapter.

Forget that.

I hope this is the beginning of a new book, because the last one was far too painful and ended in a way I hope to NEVER repeat.

Yesterday was the first day of school at a new school.

This means there are new staff and new routines to learn. Anything new can create chaos and anxiety for Daniel.

Being at a new school also brings a sense of loss for both Daniel and Jonathan. Their friends aren't at their school with them any more. I pray they can find friends that they can play with and learn from. I just pray that Daniel gets the courage to go play with anyone.

The people that were most familiar with Daniel are gone and mostly for good reasons.

All I can say right now is we hope they learned from Daniel how to treat students and we hope the laws regarding how adults treat children in schools change.

This is Jonathan's 4th school and Daniel's 3rd school and Daniel is in First grade in this district. I wish This school district would not move around their special education students so much. The school district is causing some instability for the most vulnerable students... Let us put down some roots and bloom.

We are going to a school that is a wee bit closer to home but still a good distance away.

Here are our stats:

Daniel started First grade... He has 2 teachers. Mrs. T. and Mrs. P. He also has one speech therapist who is also Mrs. P....We happen to have already known one of our teachers through church.

Honestly it felt awkward when I learned she was going to be his teacher. and then after talking to a mutual friend we all agreed that maybe this was God answering our prayers and that maybe she might be sensitive to know what his needs are and not hurt him.

He will split his time depending on how he is doing behavior wise.

Sarah is still a year away from starting Kindergarten and we will be starting a home school curriculum for pre-k.

Friday: How has Daniel been this week? He's had several melt downs, potty accidents and has run away several times. This is pretty much mild Daniel at school. Not too sure anyone really knows what they are doing, but since they are totally retesting him I cannot do anything but watch. I have been told I can only give a history of what he's done and how the last school dealt with it. I cannot and should not be trying to fix anything for the school. I have to let them figure it out. If it's still wrong when we go to our IEP/ARD meeting, then we're going to get someone to bust some chops.

We would appreciate any and all prayer/thoughts for the year.

We had issues in the morning with how late the bus what getting to school. The bus would come at 7:10-715 am and wouldn't get to school until nearly 8 am. We will be addressing the bus issue and our compensatory (make-up) speech therapy issue that goes hand in hand... but until they fix this I will be at least taking them to school.

Until then Enjoy some first day pictures and be very blessed.

It is Finished... Sort of

2015-06-21T23:13:00.000-05:00

Okay At the bottom will be some pictures. Some people want their Hoover dose.
School finished out May 29th for Jonathan. He'll officially be in fourth Grade.
We made the difficult decision to pull Daniel out to homeschool on May 4th, abruptly ending his school year.
We were in the middle of a major dispute with our school district and there were attorneys involved. I won't get into major details but it did get WAY worse before it got better. Absolutely crazy.
Our advice: unless the crap is hitting the fan and people are outright screwing up majorly, and breaking several federal laws regarding your child with a disability at school, do not file due process. This was an extremely emotionally draining experience, as well as a time hog. we had to basically clear our calendar and be ready for anything.

If you have been dealing with a school district and hitting the same brick walls and getting no or little movement as we were. My sincerest empathies. Go to COPAA and Find a great educational attorney or Advocate. Find out what your rights are and fight for it.

We are happy to announce we are no longer amid a Due Process lawsuit.
We were able to attend a mediation with the school district and get what we wanted.
What this means for us is we are going into a new season. With a new school, with new teachers, more therapy and yes everyone is getting training in the areas of restraint and seclusion and it's legal and not legal uses.. We get new IEP meetings and documents and both boys are getting new evaluations so their programming and supports match their needs.

We'd Like to thank....

We'd first of all want to Thank God for pretty much, showing up and rescuing us from the desperate ditch we were in.
2nd (keeping it general because I'd be remiss to forget someone)
Thank you to all of our friends/Family for your friendship, love and support.
Especially those who gave us sound advice, prayed for us when we needed it, and talked us off the ledge of our sanity, and especially if you made us laugh.
We would like to thank those especially that we know of or don't know about who have been praying along and have prayed "Jericho" prayers for us. This is a huge answer for us although this may only right our ship so we can move along. We appreciate your prayers and covet every last one.

We would like to thank the Miller Family for volunteering to watch our kids while went to various meetings. We owe you so beyond everything, gratitude doesn't seem enough.

We'd like to thank the professionals we trusted and continue to trust to help us navigate what horrible situation we had been in for a while. They like to think of themselves like roadside assistance with supernatural vision. We could not discern how deep a ditch we were in with Daniel and apparently after they dug through records and talked to us...we had apparently not just gotten in a ditch but had also were hanging dangerously off the side of a mountain and had overheated. We needed a tow truck (due process). Somehow Daniel had slipped through so many cracks, no one knew what they were doing or where he should be.
as an aside I would like to thank Daniels developmental pediatrician and regular pediatrician for sharing our sentiment about our kids and their situations and for allowing us to use them (although very sparingly) to try and get what Daniel and Jonathan needed.

What we learned.

We learned several things.
The first being that having a child with special needs comes with a little bit of a filter. You see only SOME of the stuff you're dealing with while the rest you may not see completely. We always hope that we see things seeing totally objectively, but sometimes we can't see everything and that's okay.

Secondly, we cannot do everything we want for our children to the extent we want to. We strive to be awesome advocates for our children but there is only so much we can do . When we discovered there were some pretty heavy legal issues going on in our situation with Daniel, we reached the end of what we could do ourselves and called an attorney. Best and most difficult phone call ever.
We had to deal with our pride of not being able to handle this on our own and now realize we were never meant to go through things on our own.

Being also the parent of a Rare and undiagnosed child a lot of our issues are over not being stuck to a label (because we don't have any) and just treating and dealing with what issues we CAN see.
We also deal a lot with people who tend to brush us off because our kids "look" normal.
Looks can be very deceiving. If you know us well, we fight our well picked battles and try to live life as best we can. Some days we're not going to always win.

We cherish the little things because that's what being blessed is about.

Me getting an award for leading a project in Jonathan and Daniel's 4H club.

Jonathan getting The Rookie of the Year Award. (First year in 4H award)

Perfect attendance

Jonathan holding a rooster. Probably gets it from his Dad.

Jonathan cleaning up a park

Jonathan with his Legos and Gardening project. Proud of my Rookie of the year,

Sarah playing with Legos... she just gets dragged everywhere. She's doing 4H projects by default and she's a year shy of being a clover kid.

song I have been singing to my kids

2015-05-05T23:16:00.001-05:00

This song I've been singing to them when this comes on my favorite radio station Air1...
We've been having some issues lately which leave both Daniel and Jonathan feeling like everyone is against them.
We withdrew Daniel from school to homeschool yesterday with a little more than 3 weeks left in the school year. We did this out of an abundance of caution concerned for his safety. He had run away from staff and out of school half a dozen times last week alone. and NO I'm not going to call the media.. calm down.
We attended our Resolution session last Thursday and spent 2 hours NOT talking. Someone else did all of the talking for us the same way we would have talked if it were us only no one can use what we said against us because we didn't talk. It was pretty eye opening, but overall our school district is pretty ICY. We didn't expect anything to come out because in general these sessions don't do much. They didn't expect us to bring in some representation. They were fully expecting us to just lay down and roll over and do what they wanted. NOT. Gonna. Happen.

I'm Just here because the law says I have to... Just like this guy did at the 2015 super bowl media day... only we thought about it and decided not talking at all was easier.

At this point Andrew and I have placed our concerns at God's feet and our Educational attorney is doing all the fighting for us. at this point we have had several things happen to confirm that , yes we did the right thing by making the decision to call an attorney to fight for Daniel's civil and educational rights.

Jonathan had his appt. with his new developmental/behavioral pediatrician and because we know this doctor well enough because she sees Daniel she knew us so we were able to get down to business pretty fast. Told his whole story and my frustration with the medical community in the Dallas Fort Worth area.. Finding a caring pediatrician who got what we were dealing with and was on the same page with us took forever to find... so much so she checked on Daniels progress and we decided we will start weaning him off his meds this week and adding a new medicine

Jonathan saw the Neurologist last week who checked him out and the spot on his back is a scar from one of his dramatic trip and falls down the stairs. His NF-1 is fortunately only segmental meaning it's less severe in it's effects with no tumor development likely. The tricky thing for Jonathan's doctors is trying to determine which symptom is part of NF-1 and which is part of the Chromosome 21q22 deletion he has. so a team of people have been following on an as needed basis. Genetics, though is once a year just to follow him.

Prayer request (Prayers, thoughts, intentions whatever and however because everyone has different beliefs)
If you could send some our way towards our lawyer on Wednesday ... He has a pre-hearing conference regarding our case. Pray for the hearing officer to be fair. pray for favor so we can put Daniel back in school in the fall with the appropriate programming and supports he requires to be successful..

if you can pray for me I have been totally suffering with seasonal allergies... which invariably leads to either sinus issues or an ear infection. my right ear is giving me a fit again. I see my doctor tomorrow. Stinkin stress.twice in several months. don't see him for a couple of years and then then it's more than I'd like because I generally try to stay away from doctors..

Be blessed even if you are walking through the Valley or if you are on a mountain top. May your valleys not be as low and your mountain top be a place of rest and preparation.
Shalom

Undiagnosed Awareness 2015

2015-04-27T22:50:00.001-05:00

Daniel is in this video. at about 2:19 Feel free to watch the whole thing... He is our undiagnosed kid. Some day we would love for the unknown shadow to show it's ugly face for the last time and for a person to say oh that is _____/ and you treat it this way. Done. Until then we hope and we pray. When we see a need we fight for what we know he needs. Sometimes we find out that he needs more than the adults are willing/ able to give to him. Sometimes we see a need and totally don't know who needs to be involved with a special expertise or what to try and meet the need and what needs to be done.

2015 Bluebonnets

2015-04-27T22:34:00.001-05:00

I'm going to give Photo Credit to whom it's due... Mr. Brooks Kelley. He found this gem of a location that fit every check on our list. Even though in many places in Texas you can find these blue flowers next to the side of the road, many people just pull on over and take a picture. No, not us. Because we have a child who has no sense of danger and a large sense for ~~causing drama~~ err I mean adventure we tend to look for places that are off the beaten path...Away from a road.
This place was called Penn Farm and it's inside of Cedar Hill State Park.
It was not all that far away from home and this area was so very peaceful that I really just wanted to stay there forever....

Enjoy and Be Blessed

Pictures

2015-04-11T12:12:00.001-05:00

The next few entries will be more pictures while we are in the process of doing something called Due Process... Scratching your head? I have a pretty great article HERE for More

While we were on spring break in March, their Aunt Diana came to visit... so we went on an adenture. More pics in tomorrow's post. This was taken in Dallas AKA the BIG D.

We've been busy doing things with our 4h club...Here we were at The Cowtown Clean up with East Fort Worth 4h. I am so very proud of my kids.

Jonathan holding a rooster at a 4h meeting... sometimes members bring things they are showing, for show and tell. This exposes kids that have never seen or known what they can do in 4h to what they can do.

I had the opportunity as a parent to lead a 4h project. We chose to create a lego project for younger kids This was an awesome project

Our Easter Pictures taken at our Church on April 5.

Be Blessed

A story about someone I love and what they taught me.

2015-02-13T23:37:00.000-06:00

Okay I was thinking about someone I dearly love. I will not apologize for anything because of several things I was reminded of when I was with her.

I have a friend named Jennifer. Okay you say which one? Alright fair enough half my friends list it seems like. Jennifer and I have known each other for a while. We all met through mutual friends. We became close friends.. Long story short the mutual friends moved away and we all decided to hang out together... my oldest son, Jonathan shares the same name as her husband. awesome family.
I never thought I could write this but somehow I was reminded. Now that she knows... :-)

1. Never go anywhere while you are pregnant without a buddy. At about 31 weeks when I was pregnant with Sarah Grace I got Hypermesis Gravidarum (extreme morning sickness) and had to go spend time at the hospital so I could learn how to eat again. Apparently Sarah was laying on part of my stomach and I was unable to hold food down because she was on a nerve that caused severe pain whenever I ate or drank anything. After I came home Andrew put me on restrictions so I wouldn't overdo myself caring for my kids, doing laundry etc. This was good although it literally took 3 people to do what I normally did.
Jennifer became my doctor buddy. She got to do everything with me well, except the private things. She was able to be with me for a lot of ultrasounds to look at Sarah. She also was there for me freaking out. Which leads to

#2 Expect God to Show up in ways that will totally blow the lid off your God box forever.
Case in point...
One day as I said I went to the doctor, and I was telling him that I felt scared having to go to L&d with the complicated history I had with Jonathan's delivery and nicu stay. The doctor asked if we prayed and the answer was yes, sure we all pray... and then he asked if he could pray, and he did it right there in the exam room. That we were not even expecting this because a lot of Christians when they ask to pray for someone don't actually do it there with someone. Well not since we left MorningStar. We both realized how ministry was exactly where you were and not exactly in africa or in another country. He was a minister with an MD. His mission field: his office with his patients and with his patients in the delivery room. God uses you where ever you are. We marveled at what God did, because it was so powerful over lunch at Mama Ricotta's.... mmmm Tiramisu...

3. I never thought the scripture we wrestle not against flesh and blood...would come to life at a church event we visited and I guess it became a WWE event where it became a wrestling match with the pastor and some guy. It was scary and rolling on the floor funny... I was very pregnant and my kids were 2 years old and 4... I was afraid for my kids and myself and funny because a senior pastor was acting like a kid.

4. When in doubt take a funny picture or video...you'll totally laugh later and forget the thing that we were all stressed out about. Even if we were literally clowning around.

5. The day I had Sarah, even though she was not with me ...I felt like she was with me in Spirit. I prayed for you and your husband the entire day.
Words alone cannot express my love and gratitude for what you gave me in my life and what you did for my children.
a few months after I had Sarah, Andrew and I decided to move our family to Dallas/ Fort Worth. It was the most difficult thing we had ever done.
When all 3 of our kids were sitting on a plane waiting to take off I seriously started weeping. my heart broke and I truly feel like I left a large piece of me in Rock Hill. It took me a while, although I still miss Jennifer like crazy.
I have several very close friends that are more like family to me that it even feels a little bit weird saying that they are "friends". Family is forever, and I will never, ever let you forget. I pray for you often.

So why am I talking about her? Well, honestly she came to mind and the Lord started to remind me of all the things that He did and just how totally insane and awesome that was and how powerful and encouraging and life bringing this just sharing REAL life is.

I love you Jennifer and I'm just awed by the fact you are so amazing. <3 p="">
I dare anyone to share a memory you have that left a lasting impact of one of your friends.

So glad it wasn't me they were talking to...

2014-09-30T13:07:00.000-05:00

Just so glad these random conversations Andrew has more often than he would like to admit. don't happen that often to me, because the response would have been different. I would have asked him to pray for us.

Anyways Andrew was in a car with a guy that came from church.
(Men's activities are pretty common he has become friends with some of the greatest couples from our sunday school class this way.)
pretty great guy that I've actually met his wife on several occasions. They got to talking and the guy was talking about how much he loved our school district. He was talking about how he could pick any school he wanted his kids to go to because I guess he got seriously lucky. He was beaming so much about it. My husband decided just to be very happy for him and decided to say nothing, and changed the subject.

This guy could be a lot of people we know. so no nasty emails saying it was you and how we are slandering anyone. This isn't pointing anyone out and there is no object lesson here. This person remains nameless for a reason. They are considered to be members of our family and we absolutely love them.

In our time here a lot of the people we've run into have said nothing but very positive, nothing but glowing things about our school district. I have also run into a very small amount of people who've experienced the worst stuff because of the school district. The difference between the two is whether children receive special education services.

Our Two boys are in a very special predicament though. One has a rare genetic condition and the other one is still undiagnosed... all we can do is fight for the things we can tell that they need, and find the specialists who can run the tests or look at our kids thoroughly enough to get us into the NIH Undiagnosed diseases clinic. I've discovered some kids may outwardly appear normal can have the biggest challenge of getting help especially for speech and language and fine motor. But the more I talk to parents of rare or undiagnosed kids, the more I find this is totally a normal thing. Sad, but totally true.

All I can say is when I run into someone who's happy and having a super experience with their kids, I'm jealous, and I am happy for them. I know they have their own challenges but mostly have kids that don't require as much help.

I wish I could pick any school to send my kids to but us normal earthlings have to stick with our assigned school zones. If I want to change their school we'd either need to move or apply for a transfer in their one month transfer window and get approved. I'd totally pick the brand new school in Viridian, (Brand new school in an upscale community with custom homes...) but we decided that this year we would stay with our assigned school more than 3 miles away. We decided not to disrupt Daniel's happy world and besides we know the staff. We'd rather deal with demons that we know versus an unknown devil that could be worse. Yes, we know to not do things out of fear, but it is more or less the only thing we can do right now short of winning the lottery and moving to Southlake or Grapevine,Texas.

In our school district nothing will mess up your normal zoning rules of going to the nearest neighborhood school other than living in an apartment complex. The last school we were assigned to was 10 miles away because of this. SO glad we moved a year ago for other reasons. The one we are assigned to now is a little more than 3 miles. I pass 2 schools every afternoon...and a 3rd one isn't that far away either. BTW I pass Bellaire, and Harrison Lane. Stonegate isn't much further away.

There are several things that if you know me you know how I feel.

1. We want to totally LOVE our schools, our teachers and the staff at our schools.

2. we are pretty much big supporters of teachers, and big fans of the teachers we've had.

3. We want to be partners in our kids education, not just drop them off, and hope for the best.

4a. We really despise people who have the responsibility of doing what's in our kids best interest as their paid profession but DON'T because it's easier not to.

4b. I really don't enjoy being their on-call rescue team. Especially when I know they have resources available to help prevent some of the issues.sorry but calling me is not a very good intervention plan. It sends the wrong message that if I act bad enough mom will come get me and take me away from a place I hate...instead of actually teaching my kid that acting out is unacceptable and I need a cool down/ change of environment.

5. I have several friends who really want us to hire an educational attorney and take the school to due process and/ or file an Office of Civil Rights complaint due to several violations of our children's rights, including the use of seclusion and violations of the process of obtaining special education services in which the school would rather take my doctor's word over the parents; leaving us as parents having to recruit our doctors to do our advocating. Our doctors and specialists don't want to get involved or talk to the schools because it messes with doctor/patient relationship. We totally agree.

We have no ill will against anyone and only want to do what's in our children's best interest. Even if it means bringing other people in to help us get what they need.

What we are up to right now....

Waiting on genetics appointment in February 4th... We just did some testing on Daniel and it came back normal.I really think that they didn't test for enough. We are on a waiting list for the soonest available appointment. We'd like to go to Baylor's undiagnosed diseases clinic and try to find an answer just so we can plan for the future if nothing else.

We are also about to start a Positive Parenting class called PPP Parenting. Our developmental pediatrician got us in so we can learn some more strategies. Starts this week.

Researching the best options in schooling for Jonathan.He's a very smart kid who's into science and social studies but struggles in language arts and math because of his issues with speech and muscle tone. He can now type at two words a minute. so assistive technology can't help.

We are looking into alternatives to public schools... This school district is not very good. The only reservation I have is that right now I would totally lose all of my patience, because somehow he gets an attitude just because of frustration.

What I didn't know until a few weeks ago was that he's been the target of a few bullies AGAIN. Sigh. Third grade boys I can totally do without. The whole experience with bullies has turned me off of wanting to do extra -curricular. at least with these kids. It's also left Jonathan a little bit emotionally scarred. He wants to be friends with everyone that will let him. He doesn't care who they are or how different they are from him.

Thinking about Preschool for Sarah as we are nearly Potty trained. Watch I jinx this with the potty training..we are pretty confident she won't qualify for the one our school has. We are doing extremely well at Andrew's work...for the first time ever we are doing better than we ever have financially. Andrew's last raise put us out of contention for the school's pre-k program...We'll figure it out but if you are local to me and have ideas and even if you are homeschooling I'd be open to it. She's already pre reading. Please contact me on Facebook.

I am attending seminars and watching conferences online to learn more about dealing with doctors and the schools.I am also researching my next steps in terms of completing my education. Whether it's completing another degree or starting in another direction, altogether.

Just be blessed.

Trina

Time

2014-09-09T14:27:00.001-05:00

We had lunch with Daniel last Thursday. It was awesome. All he wanted was a chocolate doughnut.if you remember cafeteria food from back in the day you were in school...the food it's much worse.

First day of school 2014

2014-09-08T22:43:00.001-05:00

Here is Jonathan and Daniel on their first day of third grade and kindergarten (we got a do over).

This is real life

2014-09-08T17:13:00.001-05:00

This is real life. We're not in a movie that's scripted. I'm sorry but I am not a hollywood movie star.
Life can get so hard, but I am glad we are in God's hands, and not just left here to fend for ourselves.
About a month and change ago I took Daniel for a follow up visit to his developmental pediatrician. after telling her about our many No Good, Horrible, just plain old bad days we've had at school... It seemed more like a long series of unfortunate events,. She suggested that we go ahead and put him on medication. but first we needed to get an EKG to see if his heart was okay to go on the medication.
Okay, if you know me..You can relax.I am not a proponent of putting little kids on medication. In fact I'm rather very conservative and need fifty reasons to consider it and I need a pro and con sheet etc. This is especially true with my kids.
We went and got the EKG done at the children's hospital. He was so freaked out that he peed himself on the table and all they did was put stickers on him.
We went home and waited. Later that week we got a phone call saying that there was an abnormality on the test. we needed another test and a visit with the cardiologist.
At first at hearing this both Andrew and I were totally freaking out, but then I had a sense of total peace. I could not understand why it was there, but honestly after everything my kids have gone through, anytime peace shows up I'll take it. I told Andrew and suddenly he felt peace about it too.
We had to wait 2 weeks to go get the other test. We waited until the 14th and went to the cardiology place.
Next time I'll just let Andrew take Daniel because Sarah is very impatient and has no manners when it comes to waiting rooms. That and their NICU model room gave me flashbacks all the way back to Jonathan...
Waiting is the worst.
Andrew and Daniel come out and we were pronounced healthy. I felt so relieved I cried. Andrew went phew we dodged that bullet. The doctor couldn't find anything wrong structurally with his heart.
Since school was starting, we were in the mad scramble mode to get ready like we always are.

Add in a schedule change for Andrew. He is now working Sun through Wed. 6 am to 4:30pm. Yep, he is working Days and he is feeling more rested than he had been in a while. Having 3 kids and working anything other than days is not a good mix. one's sleep will always be broken, Being that because your house has a certain level of noise that cannot be avoided.

So this last week we called the doctor that wanted the first test and said we got cleared, here's the doc we talked to... Can we start the medication.

I'm not about to list all of our reasons, but let's just say we thought about all of it carefully and prayed about it and decided to try this medication, so that Daniel can have at least a better chance at being calmer through the day and have a chance of not ending up in the office with the school calling me every 30 mins so that I can rescue them from him, (yes I know they were treading the thin line between following and breaking federal laws regarding kids and special education) sign us up.
We started on Sunday and won't know if it is going to work for a week or two...
we are just way too thankful that so far we are having great days at school although Daniel has only had on serious incident (which the teacher under told me verbally but in writing it was far more serious.)... Yay they are creating paper over this stuff.
So Be blessed while you can in every circumstance.

Happy Father's Day

2014-06-14T23:23:00.001-05:00

The Hoover Household@ the Bluebonnets 2014

2014-05-25T07:30:00.000-05:00

Because: We know These Kids grandparents, Great Aunt ,several Godparents and "Aunties" Read this page ~~whenever I get around to it.~~ I will try to explain these pics... and By the way I can send to any Walgreen's any of these pictures so send me an email or call me or Facebook message me and I will be on it as soon as I can... you all deserve pictures and all I need to know is where you want them sent...(especially for Grandma, Grandpa, Aunti and Babz and Jennifer)and all our godparents.

These pics were taken on April 23, 2014 just outside of Dallas, TX by a friend of ours by the name of Brooks (AKA Mr. Boo)

Jonathan (8) and by our nature someone is always around. He had his second eye surgery the following day. This kid TOTALLY loves Science and social studies. He loves legos (which we've recently gotten into)

This is one of the ONLY shots that was posed for Sarah has some of the most wild expressions. Daniel is always impossible to photograph. Getting all 3 to look at the camera at the same time...totally nearly impossible. This location was chosen because although it was easy to access, we felt it was far enough away from the road just in case Daniel decided to make a break for it. He ended up being way more behaved than the total of 5 kids that were on this outing.

There is always someone either laughing or crying in all of our pics... I'm not sure what Daniel was laughing about other than photo bombing his brother.

Daniel (5)

When he settled down he has a sweet demeanor. That or he was plotting... This was not posed.

Sarah (3) We think this totally looks like a painting. And yes that was a pretty steep hill. She spent the whole time trying to convince Brooks that she was a princess.

She is a very funny in a rotten 3 year old sort of way... Her grandparents and her Great aunt would pleasantly surprised her personality is a cross between girly girl and a tomboy. She can do both. She LOVES Sofia The First.

We have decided after some discussion to have Daniel repeat Kindergarten. He was neither academically or socially ready to move on. We pray his next year calms down for everyone's sake. We had a ton of Drama with his teachers and school...especially after he's run from school off the property...with staff chasing him.

Daniel was recently diagnosed with a mild to moderate Intellectual disability. We are about to run some genetic tests on his blood to see if we can't determine the cause.

Jonathan is doing great in school... minus the falling down all the time. Balance is a continuing issue. He isn't looking forward to Third grade too much. I believe he got his dad's mind and issues I had as a kid growing up... Brilliant mind, sometimes too brilliant that his body can't catch up and do what he wants it to do...

His speech therapist is working on a few things with him so he can be understood in a conversation and sound a little more mature.

Be blessed.

Merry Christmas From The Hoover Household

2013-12-24T19:24:00.000-06:00

Merry Christmas

From our Family

To YOURS

With Love

Andrew, Trina

Jonathan, Daniel sand Sarah!

Our Big update and more pics

2013-12-10T09:12:00.001-06:00

More pictures and our long awaited update... and NO We are not pregnant...

Our Family is complete. The Hoover Trilogy had it's final installment December 27th 2010.

March 16,2006

Now for our update: We were able to get in to be seen by the best genetics clinic in the area. Both boys were seen! Great news is that Daniel will now be tested with the full microarray (that looks through all 23 chromosomes). He previously had one area checked to see if he had the same chromosome deletion his brother and mommy have, which lucky for Daniel he does not have.

The only thing is that with the implementation of O'care or ACA most insurance won't pay for this test... so we are waiting on our insurance to approve. This test costs $1200. SO at least we have progress in the right direction and not the usual brick wall we've been banging our head against , it seems.

July 25,2008

I used to pray for big things to happen, because I had faith for it but I think, back in the NICU with Jonathan, God had another idea... He began to really emphasize the little things that add up like pennies in a jar, that begin to add up to something way bigger than we ever imagined.

Don't get me wrong... BIG things did happen in that NICU in Charlotte. Everywhere around us there were miracles. We saw a whole lot of babies go home to happy families pretty fast, even a baby on last ditch ECMO got better in what they called record time. We saw the NICU and progressive care units clear out within a couple days. Jonathan chose to take his time... We learned to appreciate the fact that God works in the small things as well as the big things.

Be blessed and love those around you.

Halloween pics

2013-12-05T08:38:00.000-06:00

The Next couple of posts will be more pictures than me talking. We have great news, I am writing a post on... but since I know these kiddos fans include their grandparents, I will post some pictures. We LOVE you.

We had dress up day at school. Jonathan's grade level had as a theme "famous Americans". He went as Senator Ted Cruz (our Senator from Texas). I love him wearing Dad's tie.

Daniel's class theme was Community Helpers. He loved this costume so much he decided to wear it in the evening.

Jonathan decided to wear Captain America and we dug up Eeyore for Sarah. That's me in the Gumby suit... I have a new found empathy for the guys at the amusement park in those suits.

Sarah at her last ECI Visit... We passed the skills test at the school district with flying colors and as soon as we get potty trained will be going to a mother's morning out program at a nearby church, and not the school. Hallelujah!

Sarah at Daddy's work at The Family movie night under ste stars... they watched a new movie (to them) which Became their favorite movie... Despicable Me ...

Lots of sweet moments with Sarah while her brothers are gone. ALL day.

Looking at the trials of the past to see where We've been to see where

2013-10-13T20:59:00.002-05:00

Sometimes it's a great thing to look back at something that was so horrible and heartbreaking and to be able to see where God has brought is through.
We've had a lot of challenges recently(not just Daniel) , which would leave me feeling hopeless and depressed, if it were not for the Lord making a way to not feel this way.
Other than finding at least five things to be grateful, another way I often use is to look back at something hugely difficult where God proved his trustworthiness and faithfulness. Also Known as a BUT God....moments.

This video was taken on Jonathan's 6th day of life. He had just been transferred to the Neonatal ICU level 4 at what would become Levine Children's hospital in Charlotte, NC from somewhere locally. At the time this was shot we didn't know whether or not he would continue to be here. This was one of our biggest trials, and to this day I'm so very thankful for the home group we were a part of that walked beside us every step of the way, even when there wasn't a pastor to come pray. This group became the Church.. We we had bad days in the NICU, they cried and prayed, when we had great days they cheered. When Jonathan came home, we praised God for his wonderful work together. Meanwhile another of it's members we were all praying for was in his final months of his life. I was told at his funeral that he was praying for Jonathan and that to this very day still has touched me.
Jonathan has days where it seems he's 7 going on 14, and although he has physical challenges, and learning differences, we keep cheering him on because we Learned that life is a gift. And we share things together on this journey of life.

Here's another video that ministers to me every time I hear it.
Worn by Tenth Avenue North

Be Blessed

And the result is somehow different than what we expected?

2013-10-06T22:09:00.001-05:00

The morning of the third was crazy only because we had to get everybody in the house ready because after we took Jonathan to school, we left for Fort Worth.
It didn't take us very long to get there as it was our third trip collectively. We sat in our car for twenty minutes just listening to the radio and praying.
As soon as we checked in, Daniel heard his name called. After answering a billion questions Daniel's measurements were taken. The little dude is 43 pounds and 43 inches tall.
We were led into a exam room that had some toys in it and a table in it, but not much else.
What seemed like forever ticked by (more like twenty minutes) and the doctor comes in. I answer more questions, and show her the video off of my phone. She then examines him and points out every last flaw.
She talks to me about his IEP and how it was almost stripped out of services he needs at school just so he is stable enough to learn effectively. I told her another meeting has been scheduled later this month on this very issue. She leaves and comes back with her recommendations. Apparently he exhibits symptoms of opposition defiance disorder and a borderline cognitive disability(he probably poorly when he was tested on the spring). She is going to send us to a psychologist to learn how to parent him when he is in full force. She said that he acts out because he may not understand how to process his emotions and he also may be acting out to avoid doing things that he perceives as difficult for him. His people at school and us as his parents need to learn to spot this and shepherd him in how he can deal with a given set of feelings.
The doctor is also sending him to be fully tested through genetics. This is great and we've been praying they'd send him for testing there.

As for the ODD diagnosis, here's my take. We don't really know what that all means, but it doesn't really change who God created him to be. He may face a few extra challenges right now, but eventually something wonderful will come from this sweet little man. Who knows maybe he'll be a doctor or a fireman. He probably can be who he wants to become. I pray every day for him that he would know that we are in his corner cheering for him, and that he learn to work through some of his issues that someday we can laugh about this.

It's really a uncomfortable feeling to understand that some things are really out of your control and ultimately in the hands of God. Ultimately this is always a great thing.
We have already attempted a couple strategies from a love and logic type of approach and have seen some success in the limited situations we have tried it in.
In any case if you feel led please feel free to pray for him. It would bless me if you left comments and I promise to read them to Daniel.

Be blessed.

Our sweet middle child and our crazy life- Day before the specialist

2013-10-05T21:54:00.002-05:00

Wrtten 10/3...

This is Daniel. He just turned 5 two months ago. He is our middle child.
Being the middle child,He can create a ton of drama, but he can also cause others to join in the fun, even if he creates the opportunity.
He can also steal your heart, run away with it and totally spike it like a football.
Lately and for almost a year he's been struggling. Sometimes he'll totally emotionally shut down, crawl under a desk or just sit there, and lose his ability to reason. He'll just growl and scream and kick at everything and just generally refuse to comply with what's being asked of him.. By all accounts this has a totally random cause. He's done this both at home and school. It's now interfering with learning and just functioning.
He had several episodes of this at school, one of which I witnessed and was able to capture on my cell phone camera.
He also had two episodes on Sunday morning. One on the way to church, and one leaving. I had to drag him to the car. Although he's been potty trained for several months now, he's having so many accidents I was convinced that he needed to wear a diaper. He then went in he potty, which shows me this is a control issue. Every day he also walks up to Sarah and either hits or bits her with no provocation
Last Monday, by 745 am I had received two phone calls from the vice principal.
Needless to say I believe one of many things is happening. It's pretty obvious the staff at this school haven't put his IEP in place six weeks into the school year. I have meet with several of them several times, and each time they cannot recall a tiny portion of the bad things they've said. Daniel tells us daily that his teachers don't want him there. Whether or not there is any truth to this is yet to be seen as this is his perception. Since there is a lot of behind covering going on we'll probably never know the answer.
All we get is a bunch of meaningless talk. I make requests that according to the federal and state laws are perfectly legal and I get told everything else like this needs to be done at another time. To me this was a no. This also proves to me this school isn't doing a great job educating special kids because to them parents are merely a hindrance and not a valued member of the team.
We are at the point where we want to pull out our hair and bust out some special cuss words, but we won't.
I want to cry and go hide under a rock because honestly I think that no one wants to know what he's been going through. Only several of my friends have pleaded with me that we not walk through this alone, so that is why I wrote this.
I guess you can say there is a silver lining here. On Thursday we are going to go see the developmental pediatrician and it only took a month to get an appointment. By everyone's account this was a miracle. To us this just took way too long to get here.
God knows just how much I love this kid and how totally heart broken I am for him. God willing we get some kind of answer and if needed some medication, because he just deserves to be his happy little self who wants to please..

Please say some prayers, and be Blessed

Summer Fun 3 (Fair Park)

2013-08-27T19:07:00.001-05:00

This summer we did a lot of fun stuff locally.

This post is about

Summer Adventures at Fair Park in Dallas, TX

Our kids: age 2, Age 5 and age 7 all have varying interests and this was a sure hit with our entire family. All the fun of the fair with not near the crowds of the fair.. You pay one price and get unlimited rides. They had little rides for Sarah and big rides big enough for Andrew. Jonathan was one inch shy of getting to go on a roller coaster.

There was a splash pad and because Texas is hot in the summer and my kids have never seen one of these EVER. This was just their reaction and it was priceless.

They rode their first roller coaster together.

And what would a day at Fair Park be without a Fletcher's Corny Dog... Totally worth the $5 each...trust me.

This was a great trip, Be super blessed.