Lifeblog of A Modern Day Munter

3 Lionesses on a Shirt

2025-12-01T00:42:00.000-08:00

At an Extraordinary Council meeting of Maidstone Borough Council, Alessia Russo was granted freedom of the borough of Maidstone. I conveyed my congratulations to Alessia and her team mates via the medium of poetry....

3 lionesses on a shirt

A generation of girls dreaming

And there can be no better feeling

Than smashing that glass ceiling

Determination...

Dedication...

Vigour & Vim

Don't let the doubters skim

Over what you have

Achieved

You believed

And you did

No longer hid

In the shadows

Now

You shine

For women in football

Past & present

Now is..

your time...

SPLIFF

2022-09-02T10:59:00.001-07:00

Smoke swirls

& unfurls

Through the claggy haze

Blow backs

And embers blaze

Crimson to black

As Rizlas burn

Back to back

"Mate it's your turn

To skin up."

An acrid tang

Eyes half closed

A superfragilistic fug

Imposed

And as you sang

"Oh Sally can wait"

To reality

You can no longer relate

And as she's walking on by

The self begins to dissipate

Eyes meet across a room

But you're too far gone to wait

And see...

What this all could possibly mean?

But it's too late

And you're too far gone to care..

#BlackFriday

2016-11-24T23:27:00.002-08:00

Oh Valentinian Cunt

2016-06-13T15:19:00.000-07:00

OH VALENTINIAN

CUNT

DON'T BRING ME BITS OF

CARD

PROFESSING WORDS OF

LOVE!

YOU DON'T LOVE ME

DO YOU?

YOU JUST WANNA FUCK ME

DON'T YOU?

AND

YOU CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF WITH YOUR TRITE

REPOSES

AND

DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT SENDING ME

ROSES

THAT WILL ONLY WILT AND

DIE

LIKE YOUR LOVE FOR ME DID LONG

AGO

IT WAS ALL A

LIE...

..I KNOW

Wonder Woman

2012-09-26T06:35:00.000-07:00

An Eighty year old

With

Plastic tits

Orange hews

Stuck on nails

Fuck me shoes

She's dying

But fucking hell

She's trying

She looks good

For an old bird

Botox?

Peroxide?

How fab

Will this look

Formaldehyde?

She's

Done well

To keep

The look of youth

No one

Knows

How long

The tooth

She truly is?

Only

Death

Will tell

The truth

No plastic surgeon

Can help her

there.

Sunday Dinner at Harry's

2012-09-26T06:15:00.002-07:00

Gravy glistened upon his chin
Wine stained lips all aquiver
Anticipating
The sliver
Of beef upon his fork
On his tongue
Medium rare, it melted
And to the Yorkshire pud
Crisp and brown
It slipped down
Most agreeably
Swished with Ruby Cabernet
Glug!
He shilly-shallied between
The carrot and the bean
But decided to spear both
In an obscene
Fashion
And slosh
Another drop of sauvignon
Like the curve of a woman's hip
He slavered over a splendiferous spud
Roasted
Down the gullet it did slip
Chops slapped
As he lapped and feasted onwards
Afterwards
A napkin daintily dabbed
Signalled that he was finally sated
He undid a button or two
And waited

For dessert to come.

Yesterday's Boy

2012-08-21T15:59:00.005-07:00

His face had a blackberry shine

plucked from the thicket...

purple fingers and scuffed knees

How a boy should be....

Clothes smelling of fresh air

not living rooms and fags.

Trees climbed and hideouts

to find, the day filled with

adventure and the promise

of the unknown. Exploration,

unexpected finds, an old boot,

a tin can.....who is the old man

in no.42? Knock on the door...

and run......roll down the hill

as fast as you can.....then dig a

hole and hide sweets....In the

distance his name is called,

time for home.....Dinner!!

and a bath to wash off the

mud ....but not the memories.

They will always stay.

The Cabinet of Millionaires Make Underclass soup

2012-04-11T14:35:00.000-07:00

The carcasses

Of the Underclasses

are made into soup

Boiled flesh n guts

Sipped on silver spoons.

Blood sucked dry

through straws of gold

And skin

stitched into luxury leather

Prole bones

into aspic

Veins taut strings

For violins,

Teeth stacked

To build

Ivory Towers

And

Hearts ripped

Out for the heartless.

who say.....

"Let the profitless be discarded
& let their lives be disregarded
there's nothing in it for me
I care nothing for them
You see!!"

Yes the cabinet of millionaires
sip underclass soup..........

I'm Just Not That Into You Anymore. (Sorry)

2012-02-06T05:16:00.000-08:00

When I look

At you

Intestines

Sink
Into the

Floor

And
My balls

Retract

Due to

The fact

That…............

"I'm just not

That into
You

Anymore…Sorry"

.....And

That Girl

Over there
Big tits -

Blonde hair

Promises me

The

New
No more!!!Can I

Do you
And not

Weep?
Just let me

Sleep!!!!

Or at

Least

Can I
Think of Her

Whilst I’m

At it?

And even if

You stood

Naked
Legs over your Ears

I still
Wouldn’t
Notice
You’ve washed
My Pants

For too many
Years!!
I no longer
Have
A motive

So take
Your wit

And take
My pants

And just fuck off will yer!!

Low Rise Jeans In a High Rise in Peckham

2011-08-24T16:26:00.000-07:00

In a bucket
Of fried convenience
Her fingers drip
In East Street gold
Future heirlooms
If all been told
To her newborn son
Whose father he'll
Never know
But even so
He's Niked to
The max
So that's ok
And he'll learn
The facts
Along the way
By a step dad
Or five
Who'll teach him
How to stay alive
Whilst beating
Him to the floor
And it won't take
Long for sure
For one to be
Smashing down
The door
Tonight mama's
Out with Nana
Who's only
Thirty-four

The Party

2011-08-24T15:37:00.000-07:00

Well les be avin ya
down 999 Letsby Avenue
we're havin a party!
I'll be wearing pants
And in the pantry you
can pet my paunch
and call me polly
Dont forget the booze
a burgundy will do
I've got vol-au-vons
freshly nestled on
armpit hair
And cheese delicately
squeezed through my toes
And I'm gonna throw shapes
to an 80's tape
Lets boogie
But dont bring that
bird Bonnie
She kept biting me
last time we met
Turn up around 8
Please bring your
own bog roll I've
run out.

I Have a Launderette By the Sea

2010-11-08T03:32:00.001-08:00

I have a launderette by the
sea.
There
i watch mens pants
spin
And drink tea.
And as the tide
Comes in
Ladies knickers
Flap
In the wind
And Kiss Me Quick Hats
Dry
As the Seagulls
get high
On Candy floss.

Lifeblog of A Modern Day Munter

3 Lionesses on a Shirt

SPLIFF

#BlackFriday

Oh Valentinian Cunt

Wonder Woman

Sunday Dinner at Harry's

Yesterday's Boy

His face had a blackberry shine

plucked from the thicket...

purple fingers and scuffed knees

How a boy should be....

Clothes smelling of fresh air

not living rooms and fags.

Trees climbed and hideouts

to find, the day filled with

adventure and the promise

of the unknown. Exploration,

unexpected finds, an old boot,

a tin can.....who is the old man

in no.42? Knock on the door...

and run......roll down the hill

as fast as you can.....then dig a

hole and hide sweets....In the

distance his name is called,

time for home.....Dinner!!

and a bath to wash off the

mud ....but not the memories.