LifeLube: the blog

How is Javier Arellano healthy? ¿Cómo se cuida Javier Arellano?

2009-07-16T13:00:00.000-05:00

Hay muchas cosas que hago para cuidar mi salud. Pero con relación específica a mi salud sexual, cuando tengo relaciones sexuales eventuales siempre utilizo condón, además he tratado de limitar mi número de parejas sexuales (aunque no siempre lo he logrado..!).

Desde hace un tiempo, tengo una relación estable con un chico; hace algunos meses, nos dimos cuenta que nos estábamos descuidando y que a veces no utilizábamos protección; por lo que decidimos realizarnos pruebas de detección de HIV*, VPH y Sífilis, pero además acordamos utilizar condón si teníamos una relación eventual con otras personas... Quizá no es una formula que funcione para todas las parejas, ni para todas las personas, pero para mi ha funcionado!

*Tres y seis meses después nos testemos nuevamente para VIH.

There are many things that I do to stay healthy. But with specific regard to my sexual health, when I have sexual relations I always use a condom, and moreover I have tried to limit my number of sexual partners (even though I don’t always succeed in doing so…!).

For some time I have had a stable relationship with a boy; a couple of months ago we realized that we were not taking care of ourselves and that sometimes we didn’t use protection; and so we decided to take HIV*, HPV and syphilis detection tests, but we also agreed to use condoms if we had sexual relations with other people… Maybe this is not a formula that works for every pair, or for every person, but for me it did work!

*Three to six months later we tested again for HIV.

-- Javier Arellano
Mexico City

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Pupils Told: Sex Everyday Keeps the Doctor Away

2009-07-16T12:24:00.001-05:00

Times Online
By Jack Grimson

A National Health Service leaflet is advising school pupils that they have a “right” to an enjoyable sex life and that regular intercourse can be good for their cardiovascular health.

The advice appears in guidance circulated to parents, teachers and youth workers, and is intended to update sex education by telling pupils about the benefits of sexual pleasure. For too long, say its authors, experts have concentrated on the need for “safe sex” and loving relationships while ignoring the main reason that many people have sex, that is, for enjoyment.

Read the rest at the Times Online

Who's that Queer?

2009-07-16T07:00:00.001-05:00

Chaz Sun Bono (born Chastity Sun Bono March 4, 1969) is an American LGBT rights advocate, writer, actor, and musician. Bono is the only child of American entertainers Sonny and Cher.

Bono was outed by tabloid press in the early 1990s and publicly self-identified as lesbian in a 1995 cover interview in The Advocate. The process of coming out to oneself and others was a central topic in Bono's two books: Family Outing: A Guide to the Coming Out Process for Gays, Lesbians, and Their Families (1998) tells the story of his own coming out as well as stories of other gay and lesbian people; the memoir The End of Innocence (2003) discusses his outing, music career, and partner Joan’s death from non-Hodgkin's lymphoma.

Bono reported that Cher, who was both a gay icon and ally to LGBT communities, was quite uncomfortable with the news at first, and “went ballistic” before coming to terms with it: “By August 1996, one year after I came out publicly, my mother had progressed so far that she agreed to ‘come out’ herself on the cover of The Advocate as the proud mother of a lesbian daughter.” Cher has since become an outspoken LGBT rights activist. Sonny gave his child immediate support.

Bono’s paternal relationship became strained after Sonny became a Republican Congressmember from California. The differences in their political views separated them, and the two had not spoken for more than a year at the time of the Congressmember's fatal skiing accident in January 1998.

Bono is in the process of undergoing a gender transition which had begun mid-2008, as confirmed by his publicist in June 2009. The publicist stated, "It is Chaz's hope that his choice to transition will open the hearts and minds of the public regarding this issue, just as his coming out did." GLAAD and the Empowering Spirits Foundation were quick to offer praise and support for his announcement.

Source: Wikipedia.org

Woof Wednesday

2009-07-15T07:00:00.001-05:00

Bill Clinton Backs Same-Sex Marriage

2009-07-14T11:23:00.002-05:00

Former President Bill Clinton has come out in support of same-sex marriage.
After speaking at the Campus Progress National Conference in Washington, DC, on July 8, the former president was asked if he supported same-sex marriage. Clinton, in a departure from past statements, replied in the affirmative.

Clinton opposed same-sex marriage during his presidency, and in 1996, he signed the Defense of Marriage Act, which limited federal recognition of marriage to one man and one woman. In May of this year, Clinton told a crowd at Toronto's Convention Centre that his position on same-sex marriage was "evolving."

Apparently, Clinton's thinking has now further evolved. Asked if he would commit his support for same-sex marriage, Clinton responded, "I'm basically in support."

Read the rest at The Nation.

How is Pete Subkoviak healthy?

2009-07-14T09:00:00.001-05:00

Oh, I’ve done all the regular ole health stuff like working out, taking in copious amounts of sleep and trying to eat lots of veggies, but that stuff never really made me feel healthy, because I was never happy with myself. Being healthy didn’t really come until I became comfortable with and confident in whom I am, realizing that being unique and independent is a good thing, and standing out in this world works to one’s advantage.

I don’t fit into traditional boxes, and for a long time I felt this was my greatest weakness. I thought (thanks in good part to a Catholic upbringing!) that I needed to be “normal” to lead a happy and successful life and that faulty belief hampered me for a very long time. I’ve always been very masculine, but as a transgender man I’ll never fit some people’s definition of male, and I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I have a hint of faggotry in me. And even worse, I had a lot of good stuff to offer: I’m humorous, reasonably intelligent, and an aspiring do-gooder. All this would go to waste, I assumed, because conventional wisdom held that I was abnormal.

It’s only lately that I’ve come to this conclusion: fuck that! I’ll never be totally male or female, gay or straight, but I know what I am and what I’m not. I am a man and I am bisexual, and there are people out there that will hire me, befriend me and love me as is. And so it turns out the faulty beliefs I held were the only thing holding me back from the true happiness, healthiness and great possibilities of life.

-- Pete Subkoviak
Chicago

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Join the African American MSM Community for 10 - Living the Lifestyle on July 31

2009-07-13T10:00:00.008-05:00

The AIDS Foundation of Chicago and the Service Providers Council (SPC) along with many organizations who's primary mission is working with African American men who have sex with men (AAMSM) are sponsoring 10 - Living the Lifestyle conference coming up on Friday, July 31, from 11:00 AM - 3:00 PM.

AAMSM, a population whose HIV/AIDS infection rates are disproportionate when compared to those of other ethnic and risk exposure populations in the United States and specifically, in Chicago. 10 – Living the Lifestyle – Wellness Conference will address the needs of the AAMSM community and it is the hope that many African American MSM leaders and service providers will attend this conference to network and exchange skills and resources to strengthen HIV/AIDS prevention efforts targeting the African American MSM community.

10 - Living the Lifestyle
University Center
525 S. State Street
July 31, 11am-3pm

For more information contact Cynthia Tucker, AIDS Foundation of Chicago, Chicago at ctucker@aidschicago.org or Phone: (312) 334-0965

10 - Living the Lifestyle is sponsored by AFC, the SPC, Chicago Black Gay Men's Caucus, Taskforce Presvention Services, Bayard Rustin Access Center, and Brothers Health Collective.

Monday Morning Perk-Up

2009-07-13T07:00:00.001-05:00

Brought to you by Pistol Pete

Jokes.com

Mike Birbiglia - Gay Cats

comedians.comedycentral.com

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Stand-Up Comedy

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Feel the Love... Sister Glo channels Vincent van Gogh

2009-07-10T08:00:00.002-05:00

Love is something eternal; the aspect may change, but not the essence.

~ Vincent van Gogh

Sister Glo shares her glittery gems of love with LifeLube each Friday.

Sexual Mixing Patterns and Partner Characteristics of Black MSM in Massachusetts at Increased Risk for HIV Infection and Transmission

2009-07-10T07:00:00.003-05:00

A new study by the Fenway Institute of Boston is highlighting the need for a nuanced approach to HIV prevention in the Black MSM community. Findings suggest that sexual risk
behaviors of Black MSM differ across partner type and by the characteristics of their sexual
networks and that this sub-population of MSM are at high risk for HIV acquisition and
transmission.

For instance, men who reported having serodiscordant unprotected anal sex (UAS) with a male partner in the past 12 months also reported being at risk for social isolation, having unstable housing, and using poppers at least weekly during sex. But those who reported having unprotected vaginal intercourse with a female partner in the past 12 months had different risk factors, including those with unstable housing, those who used cocaine at least weekly during sex, and those who were HIV-infected.

The study underlines the need for effective prevention strategies that address the distinct sexual and behavioral risk patterns presented by different sexual partnerships reported by Black MSM.

You can check out the abstract here.

Friday is for Faeries

2009-07-10T07:00:00.000-05:00

Most Homoerotic Pop Cultcha Moments

2009-07-09T07:00:00.002-05:00

Via Maxim's Stupid Fun

Who's that Queer?

2009-07-09T07:00:00.000-05:00

Brought to you by Pistol Pete

Luke Caswell, known as Cazwell, is an American rapper and songwriter. He is best known for his explicit lyrics and collaborations with Amanda Lepore. His work focuses on gay and bisexual urban themes and content and his music and videos are heavily played on LOGO. Cazwell himself is openly gay.

A leading figure in the renaissance of New York City nightlife that has taken place over the last five years, Cazwell’s music—a ridiculously fun mix of electrified dance music and old school hip hop—is the perfect example of the new spirit of pop music. Says Caz, "When people ask me how to describe my style sometimes I say 'Just imagine if Biggie Smalls ate Donna Summer for breakfast.'"

Having collaborated over the years with a who’s who of downtown New York and abroad— including Amanda Lepore, Larry Tee, Boy George, David Lachapelle, The Ones, Chris Joss, Peppermint, GoodandEvil, Karl Giant and Lost Daze—"Watch My Mouth" is the natural next step for a performer schooled in clubland, pulling together some of Cazwell’s most effortlessly catchy singles and pushing things forward with new tracks perfectly-suited to bring the party. Club bangers like “All Over Your Face” (which first tore up the Top 40 dance charts in '06) and the recent viral video sensation “I Seen Beyonce At Burger King." "All I wanna do is party and have a good time! I think everyone can relate to that right about now," explains Cazwell.

Sources: cazwell.com, wikipedia.org

Have you registered for the 2009 National LGBTI Health Summit?

2009-07-08T14:00:00.001-05:00

August 14 - 18, 2009 at the Chicago Hilton and Towers
Kicks off the with Bisexual Health Summit August 14

Visit the Summit website

Pastor who opposes homosexuality may get Chicago City Council seat held by Ald. Billy Ocasio

2009-07-08T09:00:00.001-05:00

The amens in full force, the choir in full throated glory, Rev. Wilfredo De Jesus takes the pulpit at New Life Covenant Church to urge his congregation to dream big.

"Because we can change a life, we can change a community," he preaches. "Because we can change a community, we can change a city."

The sermon sounds like a campaign speech, fitting because De Jesus, one of Chicago's most influential Latino pastors, is making a controversial leap into politics as the choice of outgoing Ald. Billy Ocasio (26th) to be his replacement on the City Council.

But, in a complicated blending of morality and politics, the pastor's possible appointment has drawn protests from gay activists who object to other rhetoric used in De Jesus' church that they say is not as uplifting -- messages equating homosexuality with drug addiction and other social ills.

Read the rest at the Tribune.

Woof Wednesday

2009-07-08T06:30:00.001-05:00

How is Brian M. Green healthy?

2009-07-07T10:00:00.001-05:00

Most of my behaviors that others would consider healthy actually started for me as a teenager as “neuroses.” At that age, feeling uncomfortable in my body, and not feeling masculine or attractive enough for what I thought was the “gay male standard” I was determined to at least stay “young and healthy looking.”

I have never “dieted,” but I haven’t eaten red meat since I was 17. At that age I read a lot about nutrition and learned to enjoy eating a balanced and healthy diet. I’ve never felt like I had to “sacrifice” eating or not eating certain foods. I’ve always been very active, whether that means walking, riding my bike, using the stairs instead of an elevator or escalator. I don’t “exercise,” but I’m the opposite of sedentary. I don’t smoke or use drugs, I have a daily skin care regimen and avoid excessive sun exposure, and drink (fairly) moderately :)

As I’ve grown older, and more comfortable with whom I am, my ideas of “healthy” have changed dramatically. I find that the single most important thing for me is a positive outlook and finding or creating positive energy around me. While I may not always allow myself the mental space to relax, I know I can always do so when I need to by enjoying my surroundings. An easy way for me to do this is to think about the beauty of nature or music or art, or watching dogs and children playing in the park, or simply thinking about all the things and experiences that I have been blessed with during my life.

While I promote annual health checkups and trust in health care professionals, I also believe in a healthy level of skepticism about medicine, treatment options, and health information. Prevention is always the best cure, and knowing how to stay healthy is half the battle. I believe in reading as much as I can about a health condition and making informed decisions after discussing options with a health care provider and being open to new studies and information.

-- Brian M. Green
Philadelphia

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Peter, I keep having men that are undetectable tell me that unprotected sex with them is ok. What makes them think that?

2009-07-07T09:00:00.001-05:00

[Peter Pointers is here 4 YOU, as a service to LifeLube readers - whatever question you may have regarding sexual health, physical health, mental/emotional and spiritual health - ask him. He will find the answers you are looking 4. Below is a recent Q&A you may be interested to read.]

Question: I keep having men that are undetectable tell me that unprotected sex with them is ok.....What statistics are out there that make them think that????? I have always took the opposite stanz with these folks....but it has been thrown at me so many times by different men....that I am assuming they are getting some sort of stats somewhere making them think that.....

Answer: This is such a great question and, frankly, one that I wonder why I don't hear more often. I know that information about unprotected sex with undetectable men is out there... and there is a lot of back and forth about what the most accurate information is.

So, I'm not sure how much you want to read about this, but there are a number of studies that have recently come out that have to do with your question. Here is a link to several articles about them on LifeLube.

But the short of it is: In January of 2009, researchers in Switzerland published an article saying that "an HIV-infected person on antiretroviral therapy (ART) with completely supressed viraemia (effective ART) is not sexually infectious, i.e. cannot transmit HIV through sexual contact." Importantly, some important additional factors must be present, also: that the viral load must have been undetectable for over 6 months, the person must be completely adherent to ART, and both partners must be free of other STDs.

Since that statement, a number of other studies have come out challenging the Swiss statement.

1. Some argue that while viral level may be undetectable in blood, it may be found in higher amounts in semen.
2. Others stress the STDs issue, expressing concern that many men may not know they have an infection (such as rectal herpes with or without symptoms or HPV, the virus that causes genital and anal warts).
3. Furthermore, criticism came from the fact that the studies that the Swiss researchers looked at were done only on heterosexual couples from sub-Saharan Africa – not on men who have sex with men.

It is true that if someone is on HAART and has a non-detectable viral load, it will DECREASE the chances of HIV infection, but it will not eliminate any chance. And, in a real life situation, it is very difficult (if not impossible) to know if the person you are deciding to have sex with has been undetectable for a full 6 months, or if they have never missed a dose of their meds. It is even a challenge to be sure if they have had a recent STD test that was either negative or that they had gotten treatment after. In other words, we're still not sure. The U.S. government has not signed onto the Swiss statement in any way.

We still advocate that if you know someone is HIV positive and you are not, then it's best to use condoms correctly and consistently. It still remains the best way we have to prevent HIV transmission.

If you are not going to use condoms, try to use other safer sex strategies like using lots of lube to reduce tearing and friction, make sure you and your partner have been tested for STDs and treated for any that may have been there, and try not to have your partner cum inside of your ass or mouth.

Let me know if there is more information that you would like to have on this topic! I'd be happy to pass it along.

Be Well,
Peter Pointers
Friend Peter on Facebook

Tips for coping with rejection in relationships

2009-07-07T08:00:00.003-05:00

via GAYTWOGETHER

While nobody likes to be rejected, remember that it’s all about perception and that you have total control over the way that you think and interpret things; you have no control over the other person. Reframe your experience of rejection in more positive terms, develop a mindset of acceptance to bounce back quickly, and keep centered on your goals and beliefs in your ability to lead a happy life.

Read the whole item.

HPV Vaccine Found to be Effective in Men

2009-07-06T10:45:00.004-05:00

New research suggests that Gardasil, the vaccine developed to protect women against some strains of the cervical cancer-causing human papilloma-virus (HPV), is also effective in preventing HPV infections in men.

The clinical trial, conducted by researchers from the University of California, San Francisco (UCSF) with financial backing from Gardasil manufacturer Merck, may help to get the vaccine approved for use in men in Canada.

Results of the trial were presented at the 25th annual International Papillomavirus Conference in Sweden in May. Lead researcher Joel Palefsky noted that Gardasil appears slightly less effective in preventing HPV infection in men than in women.

“The numbers right now look not quite as good as the girls’ but still very, very good,” says Palefsky. “The vaccine was nearly 100 percent effective [in women] so you obviously can’t do better than that.”

Read the rest at Xtra.

Monday Morning Perk-Up

2009-07-06T07:00:00.001-05:00

Brought to you by Pistol Pete

Betty White lets Ryan Reynolds know who's the star
Uploaded by ashvokk. - See more comedy videos.

Cheeseheads can Enter into Domestic Partnerships Starting August 3

2009-07-05T07:00:00.001-05:00

Wisconsin's Domestic Partnership law, which was recently approved as part of a state budget and this week signed by Governor Jim Doyle, will likely make August a busy month for county clerks. Check out the Madison Capital Times for the scoop.

Thanks to Towleroad for the tip!

Ga-roo-vay!

2009-07-03T10:00:00.001-05:00

Feel the Love... Sister Glo channels Antoine de Saint Exupéry

2009-07-03T08:00:00.001-05:00

Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.

~ Antoine de Saint Exupéry

Sister Glo shares her glittery gems of love with LifeLube each Friday.

Friday is for Faeries

2009-07-03T07:00:00.000-05:00