Another trip in the ambulance.

Another visit to the emergency room.

This time I caught it right away and was able to get rescue meds into her immediately.  They didn’t stop it, but they slowed things down…enough that it “only” took 3 more rounds of medication to get it stopped.  (The longer a seizure lasts, the harder it is to stop and the more meds it takes to make it stop…and vice versa.)

The good news is that we think we’ve identified another trigger for her: physical pain.  Both this time, and the last time, she had fallen and hurt herself.  It looks like the pain of bumping her head/body/whatever triggers an episode.  (Another trigger of hers that we’ve figured out is the stomach flu.)

This is good because we are beginning to piece together the puzzle and while it’s a crazy (terrifying) process, we are feeling like we are beginning to understand what to look for and when to keep a close eye on her.

The bad news is that we have to try to keep our toddler from falling and/or from getting the flu.

Should be easy, right?

I wish I was exaggerating or being dramatic when I told you that it’s 3:30 in the afternoon right now and she has been hysterically, unconsolably crying since 9:30 a.m. with only a 30 minute break.

The day after a seizure is the hardest part of it all.  She’s miserable and hurting and coming off a lot of drugs and too young to know how to deal with feeling so yucky.

I’m tempted to cry alongside her.  I’m tempted to scream.  My chest is raw with little scratch marks, my arms are tired from holding her hands down as she tries to hit me, and I’ve peeled her teeth off of me more than once today.

But you know what?

She’s my girl.  She feels awful.  She doesn’t know how to cope.  And I’m her mama.  We’re in this together.

But most of all?

God is good.  Always.  No matter what.

I should tattoo that on me somewhere.

**Updated to add that the millisecond her Dad walked in the door from work, she not only stopped crying for him…but allowed him to feed her, drank water for him, and altogether changed her tune.  Thanks kid…appreciate that.  Mental note: Dad has to take the day post-seizure off from now on.

(If you want to print out that graphic up above, feel free by clicking HERE.)

Have you heard of this yet?

Well, for starters, totally watch that video.  Seriously.  No, really.

I am SO not a video watcher.  99.9% of the time I skip them.  It’s just not my gig.  But I decided to this time, and was so glad I did.  It’s cute and catchy and 51 seconds long.

But most of all, it says in a cute, silly, quirky way what I implore everyone I know all the time.  Every time I’ve spoken at a blog conference this is what I beg bloggers:

USE SOCIAL MEDIA FOR GOOD. 

It doesn’t have to be meaningless.  It doesn’t have to be about self promotion.

This new technology can be used for GOOD.

In this case, Toyota is giving away 100 cars over the next 100 days to 100 non-profits.

Every day, you get the opportunity to vote for one of five non-profits that you think should get the free car.  Whichever of the five has the highest number of votes at the end of the day wins!

(I love this.  LOVE.)

Easy.  One click.  A click that some non-profit somewhere is praying for today.

It matters.

So start here by liking their 100 Cars for Good Facebook page.  Then, while your peeping on what that kid that sat three rows behind you in sophomore year Spanish class…spend the 12 seconds to decide which of the five you like and…CLICK.  (Voting started yesterday, so we’re only a bitty bit behind.)

And then watch the video again and get that quirky tune stuck in your head.

Disclosure: I was selected for participation in the TWIN community through a program with Clever Girls Collective. I did not receive any compensation for writing this post, or payment in exchange for participating. The opinions expressed herein are mine, and do not reflect the views of Toyota.

Decorating Truths from a 15 year old Tanzanian Boy – by Nester.  She warned us.  Ahead of time.  And still my breath caught in my throat and my eyes filled with tears in an instant.  Because you can’t make this stuff up.  This is what matters you guys.  God is good.  All the time.  No matter what.

Where is the mommy-war for the motherless child? - by Kristen Howerton.  You’ve seen the cover of Time Magazine by now, right?  It has been a FIRESTORM of controversy.  People are talking about it ad nauseum.  (If you have no idea what I’m talking about, a quick google search will give you MORE than you can imagine on something that’s only been around for a few days.)  And I’ve been bewildered by the attention.  All I can think is: WHY DOES THIS MATTER???  WHO THE HECK CARES???  Why is this what gets people all fired up and lights their passion to share, discuss, and publicize??? I was about to write a whole post about it…until Kristen beat me to it…and pretty much summed up exactly what I’ve been thinking all week.

And by the way, yes Time…I am Mom enough. 

Mom enough to care more about what matters in eternity than your silly cover.

Join us in using the web for the stuff that matters.

Donate today.  You.  Yes, you.  Not the other reader.  YOU.

And then share.  THIS is what people should be talking about all over Facebook.  THIS is what people should be inundating discussion boards with.  THIS is what should be lighting people up into a thither.

Does it make YOU come alive with passion?

{And the winner of Amber’s ebook is Joanie!!!}

You don’t have to use Instagram (but if you do, I’m jeannettg)…any grainy cell pics will work!  Just no DSLRs!

The weather has been gloriously warm the last few days.

I didn’t have the heart to make Jilly wear her SMOs or her vest most of the week…besides, little chubby piggies and baby Havaianas are too cute to not display every once in a while.

We have spent the vast majority of the week in the backyard in swimsuits (the kids, not me) jumping through sprinklers, splashing in the kiddie pool, and eating lunch in the sun.

THIS is my favorite.  Of all the things I remember wanting to do so badly when I was a full time working mom…this is what I coveted.  And so, I take advantage every chance I get.

Warm sun.  Cool water.  Snow cones.  And baby thighs in suits.

Daddy was out of town on business one night and I was in a lazy mood.

Pancackes for dinner?  Awesome.

I did try to compensate for feeding my kids sugar at dinner…with more sugar…but in the natural form of pineapple.  That helps, right?

Lu has been having a rough couple of weeks.  Actually, even Henry got in trouble at preschool last week.  And while I don’t want to make excuses for bad behavior, I think the excitement and stress of Jilly’s latest episode wears on everyone…including the kids.

But Lu was about to get sold on Craigslist.  For $5.  Obo.

I was DONE.

So I thought I’d take a different approach (after constant yelling and fighting and all around frustration) and took her on a solo Mommy/LuLu Date.  We had breakfast at Panera and we “chatted”.  We went to Target.  We held hands.

It wasn’t miraculous, but I do think it made a HUGE difference.  She was back to her normal (precocious) self a day or so later.

MUCH better.

Our new stroller came!!!

I’m so excited to use it, I think I just may sneak a trip to the park in today!

You’re all probably sick of seeing strawberries by now, but it’s strawberry season and my kids eat these like candy.

This week, I bought an ENTIRE FLAT of strawberries…and thought I’d try out this pin and see if it matters.

Although, my guess is that they won’t last very long anyway, so it probably doesn’t matter.

For the first time in my life, I ran out of gas.

As in, COMPLETELY.  Like, my car coasted off the main road…down the driveway area…I was able to turn….and then STOPPED.

Like 15 feet from the pump.

Luckily this station has a car wash and the guys working it pushed us the rest of the way.

Embarrassing much?

In an effort to slow down, enjoy the weather, and make memories, I decided that yesterday was a soft serve kind of day.

It’s amazing how much happiness can come from a $0.79 cone.

And how much stickiness.

Jill basically needed hosed off.  Which may or may not have been due to the fact that she’s sneaky and ate the rest of BOTH Henry and Lucy’s ice cream while they were riding bikes in the cul-de-sac and I was watering my flowers.  They came back to find them gone…and a very happy Jill.

That girl has a sweet tooth like I’ve only ever seen…on her dad.  It’s gross actually how much sugar those two can slam.

*Don’t forget to enter this week’s giveaway!  Just leave a comment on this post…and while you’re at it, consider giving to our fundraiser!

Now it’s your turn!

Grab a button, link up, and visit each other!  The best part of linky parties is making new friends!

<a href="http://liferearranged.com/"><img alt="life rearranged" height="120" width="200" border="0" src="http://liferearranged.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/instafridaybutton.jpg" /></a>

But then I didn’t give you any after pics?

Well, here it is:

It’s cute, right?!

The one bitty thing I don’t like about it?

She looks OLDER!

But, I guess she isn’t really a baby anymore…

My favorite?

The way she likes to swish her short hair back and forth really fast.

And giggles.

A lot.

And that makes me ridiculous happy.

She was in a bit of a feisty mood…and I have more of these silly open mouth shots on my camera than I care to admit.

I really do like her hair.  It’s sassy and fun (and easy to brush!!!).

Not sure if I necessarily like it MORE than I liked her long hair…but I for sure don’t hate it.

I’m kinda thinking something midway between this chin length bob and the long she used to have will be the winner.

I’m pretty sure I could have shaved her head fully bald and she’d still be cute.

That face kills me.

On a side note…do you see how her little front teeth are chipped?

Yeah, that happened sometime a couple of weeks ago.  She was crawling and Lucy (very gently and with a kind heart) pushed on her bottom to help scoot her inside the house so she could close the door…and it was just the wrong angle…and little Jill smacked her mouth on the floor chipping both of her front teeth.

I totally cried when I saw it.

I mean, she’s a GIRL!  And she’s little!  So it’s gonna be like FIVE YEARS with chipped front teeth!!!

And then that afternoon I had a bleeding episode…and a few days after that she had a major seizure…and you know what?

I love those little chipped teeth.

Because short hair, long hair, goofy tooth or not…I’m just glad she’s mine.

Jilly.

Sweet little Jilly.

With her white blonde hair.  All thin and wispy.  Like a crown of cotton candy.

Not one curl.  Not one wave.

Hair I love to pet and touch and twirl between my fingers and tuck behind her bitty ears.

Her sister will likely spend hours straightening out her curls (while I sob and beg in the background for her to stop) as a teen trying to achieve this look.

Her wispy, pin straight hair was getting soooo long.

And kinda stringy.

And all around janky.

Well, for as janky as a 2 year old’s hair can get.

It had to be pulled back.  Always.  Because those big blue eyes needed to be seen.  And because it would get stuck to her snot and glued across her face.  And I’d have to peel it away.  Like a fruit roll up from the wrapper, only more disgusting.

And the tangles!

Brushing out that hair every day was getting to be torture.  For both of us.

And while her piggies were darling…they were getting awfully long.

And sorta stringy on the ends.

And…you know where this is going right?

Mama decided she needed a trim.

And really, if I’m gonna pay someone to trim her hair…I might as well have them actually cut it.

Right?

So while the boys had Man Time and spent the afternoon wheeling, I thought I’d take the girls to the mall.

Shopping, hair cuts, and cookies.

You know, Girl Time.

But right before it was time to head out to the local kid hair cutter place, I waffled.

Bad.

My palms were sweating.

How could I be considering cutting my sweet girl’s hair?

What if it looked ugly?

What if she looked like a boy?

It’ll grow back right?  RIGHT?

Someone tell me it will grow back!!!

Panic.

Rich people problems.

(P.S. we got her walker back and girlfriend is rocking it!)

I always swore I’d never take my kids to those kid-specific salons.

Except that this one is the same price (if not cheaper) than taking her to a regular place.

I figured the airplane seat might help.

Plus, these people are used to squirrely, wiggly kids, right?  That oughta help.  Right?

But really, all we needed was a mirror.

This chick loooooves looking at herself.

No, seriously.

As in, there are times at therapy that they have to either cover up the big wall to wall mirrors with sheets or move to completely different part of the room so that she will focus and quit looking at herself.

Because honey knows she’s cute.

Sister came too.

And sat in a race car seat and watched.

I thought she’d whine and want her hair cut too…but she was fine.

Plus, she got to play while her mama paced the room all panicky and sick to her 7 month pregnant stomach.

Because, you know, I was having my little girl’s hair cut and this causes an undue (and ridiculous) amount of panic and internal strife.

Unlike the fact that we started buzzing Henry’s hair when he was a wee 6-weeks old.

It didn’t help that I kept hearing a lot of “Aye…mami! Tsk, tsk, tsk…” coming from the airplane area.

Tongue clicking and head shaking does not calm a mama’s nerves that she’s not going to walk out with some hideous version of her once darling child.

“Sit still chiquita…come on mami…”

Stress.

Oh dear sweet Jesus.

What on earth am I doing?

That’s her hair.

On the floor.

Because surely it will never grow back and that tsking will haunt me in my dreams.

This face…the rescue me from the crazy woman who keeps messing with my head face…not helping mama’s nerves.

Oh dear.

For the sake of comparison.

Twins.  Totally identical.

And then I hear more “come on mami…jusss look down chiquita…”

I’m gonna puke.

(To be continued…)

(What?  Why are you looking at me like that?!  No after pics?  Look, we’ve been playing outside in the sprinklers and baby pool all week and Jill was apparently a fish in a previous life and won’t let more than five seconds pass before she dunks her ENTIRE head into the water…thereby ruining any potential photo opps.  Clearly she has no idea what is blog worthy.  I will snap pics this morning and update later.  Promise.  Stay tuned.)

(P.S. while you’re hanging on by a thread…you are, right?…feel free to donate a buck or two to our fundraiser.  No, seriously.  What else do you have to do on this Thursday?  Because helping another mama on the other side of the world with just a few clicks is a pretty stellar way to start.  For reals.)

If you sign up using my affiliate link, you’ll get a $15 credit immediately (but I *think* you have to spend a minimum of $30 to use it…someone wanna try and let me know?).  But seriously, look at this stuff…$30 worth of polka dotty happiness for $15?!  How could you NOT?

I need those bistro bowls.

Like I need a hole in the head.

But an awfully cute hole in the head, right?  Besides, cereal would be so festive.  And I’d look like a way fancier mom when I’m just pouring some milk and Cap’n Crunch for the troops.

The set of travel mugs would be a perfect gift…one for you and one for a friend!  And for $15?!

That’s free if you order something else!

Like those little cups and saucers.  Those totally belong in your cupboard.  Totally.

Or these happy pillows.

One of each please.

So head over to OKL, sign up, and shop away!

Disclosure: I get a credit if you sign up using my link and make a purchase.  But you can do it too!  Tell your friends and use your own code!  It’s a win win!

Hello perfectly weathered galvanized tub with just the perfect amount of patina.

Hello simple ways to make my boring wood fence happy.

Hello rusty twirly basket.  Goodbye ugly plastic pot I keep meaning to change.

Hello old estate sale hoops and pretty pansies.

Hello chippy paint and mossy fences.

Hello yellow flowers with petals so big and heavy they can hardly manage their own weight.

Hello little bird peeking out from the ivy.

Hello silly street sign.

Hello 100+ year old Hungarian baby bathtub that holds tubs of flowers for now, and ice and drinks when we have parties.

Hello old wine barrel with a bitty herb garden.

Hello bright orange flowers that open and close daily.

Hello old sign and weathered hooks to wrangle beach towels and bathings suits for springtime sprinkler running.

Hello comfy patio furniture and peeling paint that I love more and more as it wears away each year.

Hello finials and garden art.

Hello chippy bird baths and rocks with sweet reminders.

Hello baskets that aren’t meant for outdoor use but couldn’t be more perfect.

Hello fuschia just waiting to bloom.

Hello working Pepsi fridge turned planter.

Hello invitation to sip iced water while the kids play.

Hello spring and the color it brings to my bitty corner of the world.

How’s your yard looking so far?  And any ideas on where I can get more of those hoopy fence things?

Linking up with Lisa for Hello Monday…on a Wednesday.