life's a bear

Le Fin

2013-12-26T10:18:00.002-07:00

It's the end of the year and the end of 365 days on a bike (well, almost). Going through my photos of the past year brought back so many amazing memories: bike dates, bike parties, family rides, work rides, rides with family members, rides to events. An entire year of memories on a bike.

Winter melts into spring...

Spring warms into summer...

Summer cools into fall...

And fall returns to winter...

And with that, comes the end of Life's a Bear. Thanks for joining me for the past six years. I've met some lovely women and men through this blog. I will miss following them regularly, but I hope to keep in touch through other social media channels. Thanks for reading!

The Final Benefit of Biking: Motivation

2013-12-20T12:54:00.001-07:00

There are far more than 12 benefits of biking. And many of them are so closely related that it's hard to separate them (health and environment, economics and community, biking mom means biking family). The 12 that I posted are specific to me, but I have a feeling that many people experience these benefits as well.

A year ago, I decided that I was going to try to ride my bike (nearly) everyday. I created a hashtag for it (#everydayonabike) and wrote about it here. By doing so, I put the intention out in the world and felt accountable. (To whom? I'm not sure. Maybe just to myself.) It was just the kind of motivation I needed to take this type of a challenge on.

And let me be the first to tell you: It was sometimes (often) a challenge. Riding my bike means that I have to get up earlier and be more prepared. It means that I spend more time commuting than I would otherwise. It means that sometimes I would show up to a meeting sweating profusely or wiping snot from my nose thanks to a cold ride. Some days I just don't feel like riding. But more often than not, I rode anyway - even if it meant having a prolonged pep talk with myself.

Here's the thing: I never, ever regretted biking once I was on the bike. I never wished I had driven instead. I have to remember that sometimes - getting started is often the hardest part.

There were also days when I couldn't wait to get on the bike. When riding was such a joy that I couldn't stop myself from smiling.

One year is a long time to keep up with something. Although I have started giving myself a little more slack about not riding, I've kept at this whole everyday on a bike adventure. Mostly I'm proud of myself for not losing motivation.

The message here is, if I can do it, anyone can do it. I'm not a hard-core cyclist. I don't have all of the latest gear and gadgets. I'm not fast. That's your motivation: Don't let schedules or kids (take them along for the ride!) or fear get in your way of biking more. Sometimes the hardest part is starting.

Thanks for joining me in this adventure!

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Interactions

2013-12-19T22:20:00.000-07:00

I rarely smile at other drivers while in my car. Sure, if I know someone, I wave and smile. Otherwise, I'm ambivalent or cursing under my breath, depending on other drivers.

When I'm on my bike, I often get smiles and/or waves from other people sharing the road - other parents riding, people walking and sometimes people driving. Today, when I rode up to the chain grocery store to buy gift cards for the kids' teachers, a woman smiled and said hello to me. Had I driven and walked into the store, I doubt that we would have shared a look, much less a smile. I've had conversations about my bike, about my bike trailer, about my coat, about riding, about all sorts of random things with people because I ride my bike. And because I work from home and don't interact with many people throughout the day, I value being able to share a little with people. And if it's because I ride my bike, all the better.

I can't write about interactions without mentioning my social media interactions that have occurred because of #everydayonabike. I now follow many people who are just like me - not serious bikers, but like to commute. It's been great to "meet" people through Instagram and the blog who share a passion for biking.

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Apparel

2013-12-19T09:33:00.002-07:00

Over the past year, my wardrobe has shifted. Not necessarily on purpose or quickly. It's been a slow transition. Certain clothes and shoes work better on the bike and since I don't have a chain guard, I have to be mindful about what I wear. The tenth benefit of riding a bike is the challenge of finding apparel that will work with the bike (and be somewhat stylish at the same time).

Pants // The biggest change has been my conversion to skinny jeans. They're great because they're cute, comfortable and never, ever get stuck in between links. My current favorite: Old Navy Rockstar jeans. They're inexpensive, fit pretty true to size and come in all sorts of colors. My only complaint is that they are a bit on the short side. But, if I wear boots, it's not an issue. And in the spring/summer, the ankle-length is perfect.

Shoes // I know some women who bike in heels. And more power to them. I'm no good at it. I'm also pretty bad at riding with shoes with slippery soles. Flats aren't my best friend, but when I ride to meetings, I usually have to suck it up. In August, I bought a pair of Frye Veronica boots specifically for winter riding. They are super durable and keep my feet warm if I'm wearing wool socks. I'm still looking for the perfect summer riding sandal. I'm also in the market for some basic black boots.

Seen here, ski parka, Po Campo bag and Frye Veronica boots. (There are some skinny jeans hiding there too). Not on a bike, but clearly this wardrobe has impacted my non-riding days too.

Outerwear // Riding in cool weather can be a challenge because I inevitably heat up while riding. Layers are always good. But so are scarves. I've found that scarves are just about as important while riding in the cold as are mittens. I'm a big fan of my Goodwill-purchased jean jacket in the spring and summer. If it's only mildly cold, I'll wear an old wool coat that I've had for years (great because it covers my butt - an important consideration when choosing outerwear, I've learned). If it's really cold (any temp under 25 or so), I wear my big ski parka. It usually ends up being too hot. I always have my Smartwool gloves handy and they usually do the trick. Unless it's really cold. Then I'll wear some great homemade felted mittens.

If I remember correctly, I rode in 15 degree weather on this day.
I pulled out the parka, the big mittens and a scarf for that ride!

Accessories // This year I finally invested in a bike rack. At some point, I'd love to get some panniers or a basket for it. But for now, I use it mostly for my Po Campo Trunk Bag. This is one of the coolest bike bags around. It's designed to strap onto a bike rack and has reflexive strips that face traffic. Brilliant. It's also pretty great for lugging gloves and hats and snacks for kids! I'm still wearing the helmet I bought in college. Not very pretty, but it does the trick. I asked for a new helmet for Christmas. Fingers crossed!

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Bike Dates

2013-12-17T21:58:00.002-07:00

Remember that Biking Mom Means Biking Kids? Big benefit. Huge. This post will focus on the ninth benefit of biking: Biking Wife Means Biking Husband. Well, sometimes. But always for bike dates.

Nate and I made a resolution to go on at least one date per month. And for the first eight or nine months of the year, we rode our bikes to all of our dates. We've slacked on dates in the final three months of the year, but I'd say our bike dates were pretty successful. We enjoyed dates at some of our favorite restaurants, like Potager and Parallel Seventeen and Tables and Solera. And we checked out new places, like Fruition. We rode nearly eight miles to enjoy a birthday dinner for a friend (our longest bike date). And we rode to fundraisers for our kids schools. It turns out that there are A LOT of really fantastic local restaurants within a 5-mile radius of our house.

Image source.

I rode to bike dates with girlfriends (mostly to places like Neighbors, the Elm, and once to the Populist) and we embarked on several family bike dates. Tomorrow night, a few girlfriends and I are going to take advantage of the unseasonably warm weather to bike to a new place. Didn't I just write about community? I'm glad to have some friends who are willing to bike along with me!

Bike dates: I highly recommend them.

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Community

2013-12-16T13:49:00.001-07:00

There is a wonderful - or perhaps many wonderful - biking community(ies) in Denver. Road bikers, mountain bikers, commuters, cruisers. You name it, Denver has it. BikeDenver is a great local organization that encourages the bike communities that exist here. It also advocates for better bike infrastructure, educates people about safe riding and sharing the road.

I haven't joined any of these communities. Not because they aren't welcoming. But because I rarely have enough time to go on group rides. That's something I'd like to change in 2014. A new bike shop opened in my neighborhood last week, so I'll look to it for organizing local rides or joining in the Park Hill Cruisers at some point.

I have found a bit of a community via social media through #everydayonabike. There are regular posters from Portland, Omaha, Ames, Tennessee, Australia and other locations all over the world(ish). And I'm now following many people who bike regularly on Instagram. It's so motivating to see how much people ride - without any fanfare. I will miss the #everydayonabike posts when 2013 is over. I hope people continue to use the tag.

Thank you to everyone who has joined me in this adventure!

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Biking Mom Means Biking Kids

2013-12-15T21:15:00.001-07:00

I'm going to combine benefits #6 and #7 because they are so closely related.

I may be forever known as the Biking Mom now. The kids and I bike just about anywhere we go (within reason, of course), particularly in the summer when we have relaxed schedules and nice weather. As a result, Benny has made some pretty significant round-trip treks. I think his longest ride to date was nearly 8 miles this summer - to go swimming no less.

Biking has become so predominant in our routine that a ride in the car is now a "treat." The kids have been trained to go to the back door when we're preparing to leave because that's where we retrieve the bikes. They typically don't complain about it any more either.

I've gotten better at being a biking mom. I know how to bundle Benny and Lila up appropriately and I have a 30-degree rule. If it's below 30, we don't ride. That means that we can't ride to school in the winter time, but we can ride home (thanks to the Burley trailer that has enough room for Benny's scooter). When it's hot outside, I'm smarter about bringing water and snacks and taking enough breaks. It's been a learning process, but we've nearly mastered it.

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Marketing

2013-12-13T12:23:00.002-07:00

I couldn't really come up with a good name for this benefit because it was such an unexpected benefit. Business promotion didn't seem right. Marketing is just about the best I could do.

Over the course of the year, I rode to many of the business meetings I scheduled. I'm lucky that almost all of my clients are located withing 6 or so miles of my home office. The unintended benefit of pedaling to those meetings was an automatic conversation starter. Often I would walk into a meeting with my helmet and people would exclaim, "You rode your bike!? That's so great." I was never looking for accolades, but a 5 minute conversation about biking in Denver would ensue. With new clients, this was a great way to break the ice. And, I believe, in a small way, it sets me apart from other consultants. I probably didn't gain any extra work by riding my bike, but people tend to remember things like that.

So, when it comes to marketing Struckman Consulting, now I just rely on the conversational benefits of riding my bike. At some point, I'll update my business website to include information about biking and its relationship to the way I work and how I see the world.

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Geographic

2013-12-12T09:06:00.000-07:00

I've never been great at reading maps. I can do it, but sometimes it takes me awhile to figure things out. Google maps on my iPhone is just about the best invention in the world.

But typically, I only need that app for driving directions now. The city of Denver has done a pretty outstanding job of creating a vast network of bike lanes and routes that allow me to crisscross the city with relative ease. I know where all of the major bike lanes are now and can get most places without a map. I know where to ride and what to avoid. But, the Google maps ability to show bike routes in green is pretty spectacular too - for the times when I'm riding somewhere that's new to me.

This map only show the dedicated paved bike paths in Denver. They link up with a
vast network of bike lanes and routes that allow for biking all over the city.

What's more: It's good for kids to walk/ride to school and around the neighborhood too. It gives them an opportunity to figure out where they're going - something that's not possible when they're riding in the back seat of a car. Studies also show that kids learn better after some physical activity. These seemingly simple mind stretches are another great benefit of taking the bike!

Annndddd, what's more: I've ventured into neighborhoods within my 3-5 mile proximity that I'd never, ever considered biking to before. I love experiencing a new location by bike. Everything is highlighted.

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Environmental

2013-12-11T20:29:00.002-07:00

Here we are, numero tres of the 12 Benefits of Biking. It's the last "obvious" benefit that I'll cover. Health, check - definite benefits, economics - check - I saved at least $540 this year by choosing the bike over the car. While most of these benefits also benefit society in some way, I benefited from them directly as well.

The environment is a little different. Yes, I certainly benefit from cleaner air and fewer cars on the road, but I don't see it everyday.

As the folks from Bike to Work Day say, bikes use no fuel, they require much less energy to build and they don't use toxic batteries or motor oil. "Each car is a small pollution factory." Well, ain't that the truth. And I drive an SUV (please don't judge - there's a long story behind that choice). By not driving it, I'm helping the environment even more.

To think about the environment is to be a bit forward thinking. I'm not talking about progressive or even liberal. It's just considering what you do today could impact people in 5, 10, 20 years and beyond. So our choices matter, even if they don't impact us directly or in the moment. Although riding my bike is a small piece of making less of an impact, it's an important one.

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Economics

2013-12-11T08:43:00.000-07:00

In the movement to get more people on bikes, experts often note the amount of money a person can save by choosing a bike over a car. And while there are probably many economic benefits that aren't calculated (good health, for example), riding a bike most certainly equals saving money in many circumstances.

In my case, I probably rode between 1,200 and 2,400 miles over the course of the year. Not a record breaking number in any way, but nothing to sneeze at either. But let's assume that I only rode 1,200 (about 100 per month) and let's assume that I would spend about 45 cents per gallon on gas. It stands to reason that I saved $540 in gas money alone. And that doesn't include parking fees, oil changes and other driving-related expenses that I would have otherwise incurred.

Although I've always been a fan of walkable communities and tend to stick pretty close to home when it comes to grocery shopping, dining out, etc. (I call it the 3-5 mile bubble), riding my bike has made me more inclined to shop at small, local businesses - because that's what's in my bubble. This year, instead of driving to the chain grocery store for last-minute dinner ingredients, I was more likely to ride my bike to the local mom and pop grocery store in my neighborhood. It's a bit more expensive than a larger grocery store, but I know that the money I spend there will stay in the neighborhood. Nate and I also went on numerous bike dates around the area (pretty much in a 3-5 mile radius). All of these restaurants are locally owned. So while I didn't actually save money, I spent money knowing that it would benefit my community. Lucky for me, bike lanes typically run along smaller, less car-traveled roads. And that's where small businesses tend to be located. I see a nice marriage here.

At a more macro level, I joined the growing number of people riding their bikes to and from work. With our growing numbers, cities are adding infrastructure to support vibrant bike scenes. That means that less cars are on the roads. It is much cheaper to add biking infrastructure than it is to add lanes of streets and highways to accommodate more cars on the road. That kind of economics helps the greater good, but eventually maybe it will become a benefit to me by way of lower taxes.

There were so many amazing infographics about the benefits of biking from all around the country and world. It is encouraging to see so many cities embrace biking culture - including Atlanta!

The 12 Benefits of Biking: Health

2013-12-09T20:54:00.002-07:00

I'm not riding this week. The icy roads and below 20 degree temps aren't too welcoming. So I've had some time to reflect on this whole bike-for-a-year experiment. Over the past 365 days, I've noted some expected and unexpected benefits of biking. As the year of #everydayonabike comes to an end, I'd like to share some of them with you.

I'll start with one of the most obvious benefits: Health. Spending an hour and a half on the bike in a day sure is a lot better for me than driving for 30 minutes. The health benefits of exercise were pretty great. My legs became muscular in places where I haven't had muscle in a long time. But there are a few other health benefits that aren't included in the calorie burning arena - one of which being mental health. Fresh air and pumping blood do wonders to clear my cluttered mind. That's not to mention the extra vitamin D that I was exposed to while riding.

I recently read this article and found myself nodding at all of the health benefits listed.

All You Need Is Love

2013-12-03T20:41:00.001-07:00

I love holiday card time. I love receiving real mail with good tidings from friends near and far. I love seeing family photos that track the yearly march onward and reading about accomplishments and other goings on. Holiday cards weren't really my thing until I had kids. But now they are. I guess that's what maturity and motherhood will do.

Although it's hard to believe that the year is nearly complete, here we are. What a lovely year it was. Here are some highlights:

Lila turned three in September. She is most certainly no longer a baby. She rid herself diapers (during the day anyway) and transitioned to a big girl bed. She is a little person through and through and has the most wonderful of personalities - feisty and loving and stubborn and happy. She also moved into the intermediate room at daycare - where almost all of the kids are older than her. But she loves it all the same. This year, at Thanksgiving, she said she was thankful for flip flops. It's appropriate because she loves flip flops more than just about anything. Except maybe her brother. She really loves him.

Speaking of Benny (how's that for a transition?), he's doing pretty swell too. Although he would never admit it when his friends are around, he loves his sister. They enjoy playing with each other. While fights happen, they are few and far between. He's in first grade (first grade?!?) at our local neighborhood school. He likes his teacher and seems to make more friends every passing week, which makes sense because he's a friendly and fun-loving kind of guy. This semester he's taking after school art and Spanish classes in addition to swim classes. In January, he'll start ski school. Oh, and he's reading pretty well, which makes his bibliophile mama pretty happy.

Nate and I continue to be in awe of these two little creatures - although there are the rare exceptions of evenings when we need a stiff drink after the monsters go to bed. They are ours and they are amazing.

Nate celebrated one year at his new job this summer. It's challenging and busy, but he (mostly) likes it. He occasionally plays in a local band and is serving as the president of the board at Lila's preschool. Never a dull moment.

I've been keeping busy too. Struckman Consulting is thriving now. I'll (hopefully) provide an update for that in a future post. I won't be teaching at the University of Denver this year, which is disappointing, but it's just as well. I've signed three new clients in the past three months. I'd be hard-pressed to find time to plan and teach a class any time in the near future. I've been riding my bike (nearly) everyday for the past year. It's been a great experiment/adventure and I don't see myself changing any new habits.

It's strange to reflect on an entire year in a few short paragraphs, but it's a good reminder that time does indeed march on. I'm very excited to see what 2014 has in store!

Neglected November

2013-11-29T20:00:00.000-07:00

As many bloggers before me, I am struggling with this space and what to do with it. Mostly I'm struggling with time and motivation. I've been blogging going on six years now. Now that the kids are getting older, I'm not sure an online format is the best choice to record events and developments in their lives. I'd rather not embarrass them (too much) in the future. I'll make a decision on what to do in the next month or so.

We have had a wonderful November, albeit it neglected here. We're spending our last night in western Colorado. It's our third Thanksgiving here and we love the new traditions.

Stretch and Rub

2013-10-30T13:12:00.002-06:00

I've been a runner for a significant portion of my adult life. I ran my first half-marathon shortly after I graduated from college. Since then, I've completed six more half-marathons and one full marathon. I find that having a goal keeps me motivated and running more than I would otherwise. While I've had running-related injuries before (a stress fracture in my foot after the full marathon), my body has held up considerably well.

That is until about three years ago when I went skiing and fell on my hip. Hard. My hip and knee haven't been the same since. I didn't realize that having an impact injury could mess up my alignment and create all sorts of problems. Since then, I've been running in pain. Three years is a long time to be stubborn and hope that the pain will just go away.

So, when I considered running a half-marathon this year, I decided to stop running through the pain. One of my neighbors is a therapeutic masseuse and runs her practice from her home. She and I talked at a party and she mentioned that my pain was probably a result of my alignment being off. The first time I visited her, she was amazed at how off my hips actually were. I've been back three times now. And each time, I feel my alignment getting better.

And when a mom friend started teaching yoga at the local yoga studio, I figured it couldn't hurt. So I signed up (and got a teacher discount!) for the bulk package of 10 classes. I've been going for five weeks now.

I'm too cheap to buy a race photo, so I lifted the proof :).

I was a little nervous to run the Denver Rock and Roll Half Marathon. I typically try to run a couple of double-digit runs before a half marathon, but I only managed one 10-mile run. But, with all of the stretching and rubbing, I ran a decent time (2 hours, 1 minute) and felt better and stronger while running than I have for years. I also had a good running partner, so that helped too! When I was younger, I could go out for long runs, forget to stretch and it never meant much. Running now means I have to manage a bit more in terms of recovery, but the strength and flexibility that result as a by-product aren't too shabby.

Lila Turns Three (Photo Edition)

2013-10-28T21:45:00.001-06:00

I'm only a month late in posting these. What? That's not bad, right? Also, expect to see Super Girl make an appearance again later this week.

Ketchup: Vacation, Corn Maze, #everydayonabike

2013-10-28T13:36:00.003-06:00

// Vacation //

Nate and I took a quick parents-only vacation to southern California in early October. We didn't rent a car. We had to plan accordingly, so we stayed at a bed and breakfast near Marina Del Rey. They had bikes to borrow and it was five blocks away from a bike path running along miles and miles of beach. We had a spectacular time and enjoyed not having a schedule.

// Pumpkin Patch and Corn Maze //

We carved out an afternoon to spend at a pumpkin patch and corn maze. The last time we visited the corn maze, Lila was barely a year old. Visiting a corn maze with two fully ambulatory children is much more pleasant! And Benny loved finding his way through the maze.

// #everydayonabike //

I'm gathering and organizing lessons and thoughts about spending so much time on my bike this year. I've made it nearly 11 months - and I'm still going strong. Granted, I have yet to ride everyday in a month, but I probably average 26 or 27 days per month throughout the year. I'm looking forward to sharing the things I've learned in December. But right now, I'm enjoying the rides in cooler weather with gorgeous views. It's becoming too cold to ride to school in the morning. So, we've been walking instead. We can all bundle up with hats, gloves and heavy coats. Loving the flexibility foot-powered transportation gives us!

And now I believe I'm relatively caught up. Happy Fall!

Goings On (with a Side of Home Security)

2013-10-26T02:45:00.000-06:00

At Lila's hair appointment today, someone mentioned that Christmas is eight weeks away. That means that New Years is nine weeks away. That means that 2014 is right around the corner. I'm still having a hard time writing 2013 down. And I haven't even started thinking about Christmas plans, presents, etc.

But, I'm trying to live in the present. Denver is experiencing one of the best Fall seasons in years. We've had nearly a full month of nice weather, trees turning and general Fall happiness. We've carved out time for the corn maze and purchasing pumpkins. I'm baking so much now that I'm going through a huge package of flour every week or two. I also ran the Denver half marathon last week. The family is experiencing a good buzz of activity without feeling particularly overwhelmed.

We've been forced to address some home security issues as well. This week, burglar(s) broke into our home and swiped a few things. The things were petty and not worth much - a bright side of not having lots of nice stuff. They mostly took electronics, but also stole some sentimental jewelry. More than anything, it's creepy and unnerving to know that a stranger has been in my house, rooting around in my things. What's even creepier is that they pried open a locked window. Easy as that.

So, we're taking more precautions with things. Locking gates, keeping lights on. We're exploring a security system. I hate that it comes to that, but it would suck to have this happen again.

But, in the midst of feeling unnerved and annoyed, I also have felt the warmth and support from my friends and community. People checking in to make sure that we're OK and asking if we need to borrow toys or electronics. It's reminded me that there's always a bright side. Always. And I could never feel too down in 60 degree weather and gorgeous Fall views.

Book Review: MaddAddam

2013-10-21T20:05:00.001-06:00

I've been waiting for this book since before Lila was born. It's the third in a trilogy by Margaret Atwood. Sadly, I don't remember the first two books since I read them both in the latter stages of pregnancy and everything at that time is a blur. I do remember devouring the first, Oryx and Crake, and the second, The Year of the Flood.

I was at a bit of a disadvantage with the third because I didn't remember a lot of the details of the first two books - or it took awhile to recall them and put the pieces together. The book was good, but a bit disappointing in tying up the loose ends of the story. It seemed to jump into story lines too quickly and didn't do a very good job of resolving the story of Adam One, the same Adam One that created the Mad Adam game, the title of the book. I don't say these things lightly either, because Atwood is one of my favorite authors. It seems like she was in a hurry to finish the series and be done with it.

Also, not to give any spoilers, but the book ends in such a sad (and at the same time optimistic) way. Although the ending Atwood chose doesn't surprise me, it was hard to digest - especially after investing so much in the characters over three books. While I didn't love the final book, I did love the series.

Urban Homesteading LITE: Family and Consumer Sciences

2013-10-18T20:46:00.003-06:00

I read this article recently on Jezebel. It discusses my generation's inability to anything for ourselves - that has led to a significant dependence on the service industry. While it discusses this issue in relation to one of the author's previous boyfriends, I know many men and women who could probably learn a few things from what was formerly known as Home Economics.

I was required to take Home Ec in 8th grade and while I had to bake some cakes and sew some buttons in the class, I'm not sure I learned a whole lot that I wasn't already learning at home. My parents required me (and my siblings) to do our own laundry, cook meals for the family, sew (this was probably the only gender-specific item on the list that my sister and I learned how to do), mow the lawn, check our own oil, etc. It was sort of a necessity with five kids. My mom certainly couldn't have done all of that stuff while working part-time.

But, I see the point of the article. While I had Home Ec and a mom who taught me life skills, I've had to do a lot of learning on my own as an adult. But, as I've learned from many other experiences, once you start doing something regularly, you realize how disturbingly easy it is to do. I often wonder why I haven't pickled or baked or gardened or biked my entire adult life. Most of the time, it was just a matter of starting something and practicing to become better.

The article was a nice reminder about the importance of passing these skills onto my own kids. Often I get caught up with the hurried harried pace of life and I tend to do a lot of stuff that my kids could otherwise do. Sometimes I need to take a breath and walk them through baking or cleaning or even knitting. And I realize the need to have Nate partner up and model this behavior to the kids. Since I work part-time and he often works well over full-time, I take over many of these tasks. And it worries me that gender will become an excuse for not teaching Ben how to sew or not teaching Lila how to mow the lawn.

First world problems, for sure. But maybe, just maybe, if a critical mass of parents reverts back to teaching real-life skills and responsibility, we'll have a better society for the effort.

Do It Yourselfies (Ninjas and Chocolate Cake)

2013-10-15T21:19:00.001-06:00

Gah! Halloween is just about two weeks away. How did that happen?!?

I'm going through the yearly struggle to overcome my un-craftiness to become crafty for one month. I committed to making the kids' costumes from scratch when Benny was four and when we were out of hand-me-down costumes. This year, he wants to be a black ninja. I need to find some black pants, a long black shirt, a red sash and some sort of head dress. Not to mention some homemade throwing stars. Pretty easy. Especially considering that Benny started out wanting to be a Lego man. Cool, but damn hard to make.

Lila, on the other hand can be a dinosaur or a super girl. She's not sure which one yet. Luckily, we have both of those costume on hand. Easy breasy.

Expect a Halloween report out by Christmas (and maybe sooner, if you're lucky).

Also, I feel like I would be a total jerk if I didn't share this chocolate cake recipe with you all. Holy hot damn. This is the most amazing moist chocolate cake I've ever made. Ever. I've made it twice in three weeks. We never have dessert so the kids are totally digging my obsession.

I've been off the bike for a few days thanks to a vacation (although I managed to ride in Los Angeles a bit) and my bike has been in the shop. I have enjoyed the break because it's forced me to walk places. And I do like to walk - I just don't do it as much any more. Feels good.

Book Review: Under the Banner of Heaven

2013-10-08T09:20:00.000-06:00

I've started taking advantage of reserving books at the library. I can't believe it's taken me six years to finally stop buying books and start utilizing the library. I know all about the e-readers and how great they are, but I can't make the shift from books. I love the feeling of pages on my fingers. I love consuming pages and visibly seeing the number of pages get smaller and smaller.

I've been meaning to read Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer for several years (since 2002, to be exact). I loved his other book, Into Thin Air, and I'm a sucker for a book about religion.

Krakauer tells the story of the rise of Mormonism and fundamentalist Mormonism through the story of the Lafferty brothers. The brothers murdered their sister-in-law and niece in cold blood because they claimed God told them to. Krakauer doesn't openly judge the fundamentalist string of this religion, but the details he includes make it clear that he doesn't agree with polygamy and other fundamentalist aspects of Mormonism. There is no gender analysis or analysis in general. But the book is quite alarming in terms of how men treat women who follow this fundamentalist sect.

It's a good book and an interesting read.

Lila Turns Three!

2013-10-01T10:25:00.002-06:00

Happy birthday Lila! Luckily you're only three and won't remember that your daddy and I completely forgot it was your birthday on Friday morning. In our defense, we celebrated on Saturday with your grandparents and your friends, so we didn't technically forget it.

Lila was so excited for her birthday party. She talked about it for a week. And on Saturday morning she declared that she was ready for her party. I told her that she had to take a nap first. So she marched into her room and went to bed. At 11:30. She wasn't going to let a nap stand between her and her party!

Like Benny, Lila has made some really great friends with really great families. And now she's old enough to play with them. She had a great time at her birthday party. Her favorite part? The alligator cake that her Nana made for her. It was pretty great.

Lila is going through some growing pains. We just finished with a phase that involved A LOT of meltdowns. Luckily, she snapped out of that phase pretty quickly, but there are still moments of extreme distress over a white shirt, opening a cheese stick wrong, riding in the bike trailer. You name it and she's probably been pissed about it in the past two weeks. I know these phases come and go. They can be trying. But I'm excited to have my cuddly, lovey little girl back full time!

At three, Lila is potty trained, sleeping in a big girl bed, knows about 3/4 of the alphabet, knows how to spell her name, is drawing circles, can ride her balance bike (really well!), can get dressed/undressed below her waist (shirts are tricky), has lots of friends, loves cooking, reading, babies, trucks and anything her big brother is doing.

I'll post pictures soon. I recently bought a new computer and I'm still learning how to use it! I feel old :).

Timeless

2013-09-26T08:45:00.001-06:00

Experiencing childhood as a parent can be so many things - awe inspiring, frustrating, peaceful, chaotic. It hasn't been until Benny started school that I've recognized some things as timeless. Sure, we all go through the baby and toddler phases of talking and walking. But no one remember doing that. We hear those stories from our parents.

But Benny is at an age now that I can remember. I can remember doing the things he's doing. I can remember my first grade classroom and my teacher and my friends. I can remember writing and playing and all things kid. I can remember losing my teeth and finding a quarter in the tooth fairy pillow. I can remember making my first friends at school - outside of cousins and friends I already knew.

Benny lost his first tooth last week. It had been loose for a few weeks. Benny ate a sandwich and after lunch discovered his tooth was gone. He was a little disappointed that he probably swallowed the tooth with the sandwich. But we addressed the tooth-fairy issue by having him write the tooth fairy a short note.

Benny has made lots of school friends. He's lucky that a handful of his friends from daycare also go to his elementary school. This has made transitioning much easier on everyone. But last year, Benny made a friend in kindergarten who he didn't know before. It turns out that he lives less than two blocks away from us. The two of them are so fun to watch. They truly seem to click. I had wonderful, supportive friends in elementary school, junior high and high school. I love watching my kids make friends that could be lifetime friends.

Book Review: Orange Is the New Black

2013-09-23T21:23:00.001-06:00

I didn't know anything about Orange Is the New Black: My Year in a Women's Prison before July of this year. I happened upon the now-popular television series on Netflix when Nate and the kids were away for the weekend. I watched one episode and didn't stop. I finished the entire series in less than five days. Not my proudest moment, but the characters in the film are just so compelling.

When I found out that the series was based on a memoir, I knew I had to read it. I loved the series and liked the book - for very different reasons. If I had read the book before watching the movie, I would probably think differently about it.

I really loved the characters in the series, so I mostly read the book trying to figure out who was who. I did love the advocacy focus of the book. Kerman is very clear about how ridiculous the criminal justice system is - particularly because there isn't much focus on rehabilitation.

I would recommend the book - but definitely try to read it before watching the series. And if you haven't already watched the series, watch it now!