“No. I don’t even notice it.”

Because I don’t.

I don’t mind the fray, and in fact, I kind of like it.

I like that torn piece with the strings dangling; I think it gives my jeans some character.

I like the fray.

I like you. And I like loose ends and missing puzzle pieces.

Life is splotchy art, and I think it’s interesting and curious and painful and beautiful.

“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” -Oscar Wilde

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My sweet friend Darlene at my last book signing!

Good morning, friends!

Just wanted to let you all know that if you’re looking for a Mother’s Day gift, and you’re thinking about purchasing Desperate – Hope for the Mom Who Needs to Breathe, come on out to the Lancaster Barnes & Noble this Saturday between 6-8pm and I’ll sign your book (and have some coffee with you)! I’d love to meet you! Plus, click on the image below to get 15% off Desperate (or any one item at B & N)!

Hope to see you there!

Love, SM

“Excellent, encouraging, surprisingly balanced book on motherhood by Sally Clarkson and Sarah Mae. Highly recommended.” -Catherine Gillespie, Review of Desperate

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You already know I finally enjoy homeschooling, and a large reason is that we’ve settled into our curriculum choices with confidence. I’m not even going to CHAP this year because I don’t want to be swayed by all the wonderful choices! It feels simply wonderful to keep moving forward without second guessing myself. If you’ve chosen your curriculum, fantastic! If you’re looking for some ideas for what to use with your babes, perhaps you’ll like some of what we’re using. Take a peek:

Spelling Workout

Easy, cheap, and effective. It’s $10 a book, two pages a day (no prep), and using it has massively improved my 7-Year old’s (who starts second-grade in the fall) reading and spelling. We’ve nearly completed two books and will continue on with the third this month (and continue through the summer). I will start Caed (my almost first-grader) on it after he completes 100 Easy Lessons (see below).

Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons

I have to admit, I did not like this reading program when I used it with Ella, and the feeling was mutual with her! We made it to lesson 84 and threw in the towel (it wasn’t sticking, and she was miserable). But Caed? He likes it, and sometimes he even does two lessons in a day. Go figure! Whatever works, right?

First Language Lessons, Level 1 and Level 2 

I like the simple lessons, the copywork, the narration, the poetry, and the ease in which the building blocks of grammar are taught. It works really well with Ella, who has a brilliant memory and enjoys memory work. I’m going to give it a go with Caed in the fall (when he’ll be in first-grade) and hopefully it will work for him as well (although I’ll go much slower with the memory work – too much of it frustrates him).

Writing with Ease Level 1 and Writing with Ease Level 2

This curriculum dovetails nicely with Language Lessons, and I just really like it. It uses classic children’s literature passages for the narration and copywork, and it’s a simple yet thorough program to follow. Again, Ella thrives with this type of work, but it will all be an experiment with Caed.

Math-U-See

I’ve used Math-U-See with Ella for two years now and will be continuing on with Beta in the fall. Caed is working through the Primer (he loves it) and will begin Alpha in the fall.

Story of the World, Volume 1: Ancient Times

My babes listen to this at night before bed, and on long car rides (I’m secretly tucking history into their brains). All three of them enjoy it, and how can you not with Jim Weiss as the narrator?!

Speaking of Jim Weiss, his Shakespeare for Children is superb!

Ambleside Online (Charlotte Mason inspired)

I love Ambleside Online and am so grateful for their articles, resources, and recommendations. We use their book lists and follow their weekly reading recommendations.

As for science, I recently decided to forgo an official curriculum and follow suit with what my friend Laura has to say about it.

For other subjects and interests, we use the library.

And last but not least, we love Lamplighter Theatre (Sir Malcolm and the Missing Prince is our favorite). Excellent, excellent, excellent character building stories!

Okay friends, your turn! What are some of your favorite resources for homeschooling?

Love, SM

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Just think, after tomorrow all this talk about the Ultimate Homemaking Bundle will go away (for some of you, you’re all, “Thank goodness!”).

But for others, it is a gift to be able to get so many wonderful eBooks for WAY cheaper than if you were to buy them all, or even a quarter of them. The thing is, sometimes spending even $30 is too much. I so get that, I’ve been there. So how about a giveaway?

Today you can enter to win the whole shebang – the complete 97 eBook bundle (worth $640)!  Even happier news? I’m going to pick 10 winners.

TEN WINNERS!

All you have to do is enter below! The giveaway ends tomorrow (Saturday) at 5pm EST.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

(Email readers, CLICK HERE to come to the blog and enter!)

Want to see all the eBooks in the bundle? Just click HERE!

Love, SM

P.S. Today (Saturday) is the last day to get these eBooks together for over 90% off. Sale ends at 11:59 pm EST. *UPDATE* The sale is now over.

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I finally, finally enjoy homeschooling.

After failed attempts, neglect, tons of curriculum, comparing, sage advice, and a settling in, I can finally say I enjoy homeschooling. Thank God. Because I was starting to think about how I could save to send my babes to private school.

My heart’s desire has always been to homeschool; I loved the idea of learning with my children, filling their minds with beautiful things, being with them as they learn about the world, and choosing what they study, based on what I thought was best and what suited their personality and bents. The problem? I didn’t take it seriously enough. I had built up an ideal (sort of like I did with motherhood), and it all came crashing down. I learned that homeschooling wasn’t easy, or always fun, and that it takes discipline, consistency, and hard work (all of which I lack, and all of which are obvious…except to me). I also compared myself with other homeschool moms that I admired, which just about did me in. I would look at pictures and read posts about their craft-filled, lap-book-filled days and feel like a loser, totally inadequate to homeschool my babes.

Some of you may have felt that way about me.

The truth is, it’s been an uphill battle for me. I can be lazy and unmotivated and undisciplined. I also fear too much: “What if she hates homeschooling? What if I push her too hard? What if I don’t push her enough?” I am a seriously neurotic mother. But I am teachable, and I have heart, lot’s of heart, and I want to be with my babes as they learn. So I’ve had to learn a few things, I’ve had to discipline myself, and I’ve had to serve hot chocolate to get Ella to smile while she does her work.

Some of you are struggling to enjoy homeschooling. Some of you are comparing yourselves with other moms, and some of you are barely hanging in there. I don’t have the wisdom of a seasoned homeschool mama, but I do have a few things for those of you who might need some encouragement to keep going.

How to Enjoy Homeschooling {A Few Things I’ve Learned Along the Way}

Know You Want to Homeschool

Do you really want to homeschool? Do you feel that’s where the Lord has led your family? Is your husband on board with it? It’s going to be pretty difficult to enjoy homeschooling if you feel like you have to do it, or your husband doesn’t want you to, or whatever other reason. You homeschool because you feel that’s what you’re called to do, and there is a desire in you to do it.

Figure Out What Works for Your Family

Break out of the mindset that homeschooling must only be done one way, or that it needs to follow a school model. Find what works for you as a family! Maybe that is a school model, or maybe it’s homeschooling in the evening, or at a park in the middle of the day. Maybe it’s two hours of work a day, maybe it’s five. Maybe it’s field trips and living books, or text books and desks. Maybe your husband does the homeschooling. Every family will have a style of their own, and that’s great! Find yours, and go with it!

Stop Comparing {And Stop Reading Blogs That Make You Feel Inadequate}

I really think that a big reason parents give up on homeschooling is because they feel inadequate due to comparing themselves with others. It’s one thing to stop homeschooling if you feel the Lord leading you somewhere else, but it’s another to stop because you are comparing yourself with another mom or homeschooling lifestyle. You have your own unique personality and bents and limitations and strengths and weaknesses. Focus on what your strengths are, and move in confidence in those areas. If you know you struggle with not feeling like you’re good enough to homeschool after reading certain blogs, just stop reading them! There are wonderful bloggers out there that I cannot read on a regular basis because I know my weakness (and sinful tendency) is to compare myself with them. When I compare, I get in a funk, everything all of a sudden feels overwhelming and hopeless, and I want to throw in the towel. But when I’m walking free in how the Lord made me, and when I put blinders on and keep focused on where the Lord is guiding us, I’m okay, and in fact, I’m happy. I love our family and where we’re at with homeschooling, and I want to stay in that place. I want you know find that sweet spot as well.

Find Support

We all need support, and we all need grace. Find friends or a co-op or a mentor  (or all of those things) who homeschools or has homeschooled to encourage you on the journey. Having supportive people in your life will help tremendously in persevering.

Have a Talk with Your Babes

I called Sally just about in tears of frustration one day and said, “Ella is always complaining about her work! I don’t know what to do!” Sally said, “You need to sit down with her and tell her that this is what we do, every day, Monday through Friday. School work is non-negotiable.” Well, I did what she said, and what do you know, it worked! I sat down my sweet Ella and gently but firmly laid out for her the fact that we will be doing school work every day. We talked about why, we talked about our attitudes, and I agreed to hot chocolate (see below).

Serve Hot Chocolate

My Ella gets through her school work by having some sort of treat half way through. In the winter, it was hot chocolate. Sometimes it’s tea, currently it’s just a snack of some sort. Find something that brings your child a smile during their work time.

At The End of the Day…

As Sally Clarkson says, “Read to your children a ton, have them around adults, and listen to good music. If you do these things, they’ll be brilliant.”

Keep on!

Love, SM

P.S. I’ll share our homeschooling curriculum on Monday!

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Research of every kind has suggested that media, constantly being indoors, over-entertainment, trying to manage children into little adults, too much exposure to sexual material and immoral values at an early age, is destroying the soul of children. They are being pushed and pulled and dragged from one place to another, endless activities, lessons that are supposedly “good” for them,  and forced to fit into the time boxes convenient to adults.  This stress is wreaking havoc and creating horrendous results on a generation of children who are growing up with emotional adult illnesses at early ages, lower vocabulary, more depression, vastly growing obesity as a childhood disease, and so much more. Premature addiction to sexual images and news stories and acting out adult values is damaging to their souls. Innocence and purity of mind is healthy to becoming healthy adults.

Children are starving for real life and drowning in the midst of an empty one.

…

May they not grow up to imitate addiction to the computer. May they not learn and display passivity from adults ignoring their needs while paying too much attention to facebook, twitter, blogs and cell phones. May they not copy the habit of observing parents dwelling hour after hour in front of impersonal machines, while neglecting to honor and invest in real time relationships.

Read the whole article, Killing the Souls of Children, HERE.

Love, SM

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From my husband, Jesse:

I had just found out that he had done something quite harmful; sinful.

My wife called me at work to let me know what had happened, asking me to talk to him when I arrived home.

Anger, frustration and uncertainty clouded my mind through the remaining hours of the day. I was unsure about how I should handle the situation.

Should there be discipline?

If I go soft on him, will he not take me seriously?

Doubts of my own ability to handle the situation creep in.

…

Want to know how he handled the situation? Click on over to BoyDads.com to read the rest of the article (it’s good)!

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My Caroline is one sassy little spitfire.

She is also sweet and adorable and giggly and I couldn’t love her more. She is lovely to me.

But that sass. Her hand is just about permanently fixed on her hip, and the girl knows how to throw out some attitude. And honestly, it’s funny. She cracks my husband and I up. It’s cute now, but I’m thinking it’s not going to be so cute in a few years.

And I know this! I know that a sassy (impudent) attitude is not something I want to cultivate in my girl, and yet, I’ve let it slip in, and I’ve encouraged it.

Now please let me put something out there before I talk more about the sass; I love Caroline’s bright and lively, full-spirited personality! I will never try and tame the way God weaved her. She can have a gentle and quiet spirit and still be loud and fun, because “quiet” does not mean quiet at all, it means *tranquil (Tweet that). I want her to have a gentle and peaceful spirit, settled, content in the One who made her, vivacious her.

However, I will work towards taming the sass. I will work towards cultivating humility and kindness and gentleness in her spirit. There are no guarantees that I will be successful, but if the Holy Spirit is in her, the work is really not mine at all do; it is His. I will guide, I will correct, and I will let her see my failures and my dependance on the only One who can mold a person. With these things in mind, here are some suggestions for helping to tame the sass…

Five Ideas to Tame the Sass in Your Little One

Quit Laughing

Seriously, this sounds easy, but it’s hard. It’s hard because you’ve probably formed a habit of laughing at your babes cute sass, and it’s also hard because others probably laugh and encourage the sass (and you can’t control others). Start paying attention to how you respond to the sass, and try instead to discourage it, correcting it immediately.

Correct Immediately (gently and with a smile)

Correction sounds so harsh and un-fun, doesn’t it? And yet, sometimes that’s what we’ve got to do as parents. I remember a mentor once telling me that she tried to have more “yeses” in her children’s world’s than “nos” and I love that philosophy, and I agree with it! We could try and create an environment where we laugh and smile and encourage rather than frown and fix. With “yeses” in mind, when it comes to correcting, one way is to praise when your child acts in humble, kind, generous, respectful ways. “Oh honey, you did SUCH a good job when you spoke kindly to your daddy, I am so proud of you!” {Hugs and squeezes and affirmation.} When the sass rears it’s saucy head, you can gently bend down and say something like, “Words are for kindness and building other’s up. Let’s try and speak in kind ways.” Also, if you catch yourself speaking in a sassy way, ask your children to forgive you; let them know it’s not your ideal. One more thing, be patient with them.

Pay Attention to Your Own Sass (and the Influences Around Your Babes)

I’m pretty sure Caroline gets her sass from me {sigh}. Maybe your babes are picking up the sass from you, or a friend, or a T.V. show. Speaking of T.V., I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but most shows for kids and tweens are FULL of sass and outright disrespect for siblings and parents. We mess up a ton in our house, but the one area we are trying to be super diligent about is what is going into our children’s minds when it comes to movies and T.V. If you’re kiddos watch Disney or other seemingly innocent stations or shows, sit down with them for an episode and take note. Not cool. I highly recommend not getting sucked into the popular kid shows of our day, there influence is strong.

Memorize Scripture

Find a scripture that you can memorize with your child. Here is the one we memorized (I sing it, which helps it stick):

“Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and peaceful spirit, which is precious in the sight of the Lord.” 1 Peter 3: 3-4

If you use this verse, talk to your chid about the “hidden person of the heart”. Talk about what “imperishable” and “precious” mean. Teach your children to ask God to create in them the imperishable quality of a gentle and peaceful spirit in their inner person. Remind them that it is God, through the Holy Spirit who does the work; they cannot “fix” themselves, but they can ask God and they agree with Him.

Pray For and With Your Babe

Ask God to mold your children’s spirits, and ask Him to show you specific ways you can help guide your children; ask Him for wisdom and discernment, and pray that Jesus’ voice would be louder than the enemy’s. Teach your children to pray for these things as well.

Your Turn

How have you dealt with sass in your children?

Love, SM

*From Strong’s Greek: hēsýxios (an adjective derived from hēsyxos, “quiet, stillness”) – properly, quiet (still), i.e. steady (settled) due to a divinely-inspired inner calmness. (Isn’t that lovely?!)

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The Armor of God $2.50

It was a gift to find this eBook in the homemaking bundle collection because I have been thinking through how I want to teach my son about the armor of God. Even though he is only six, he is already dealing with the awakenings of the male mind. I have some ideas of what I want to do to instill in him integrity, honor, and a respect towards ladies, and this eBook is a great start!

Because he’s only six, we’re going to skip over the copy work portion of this eBook (it’s more suited towards a first grader and up), but I’ll definitely start on the discussion questions (“What kind of king would you be? How would you rule your kingdom?”), the memory game, the coloring page, and the Design Your Own Sword. We’ll be digging into this study ASAP!

Write Through the Bible $5

I love this workbook! My 7 year old is just about finished with her Spelling book, and instead of moving on to the next book during the summer, I’m going to have her work through this writing guide.

It goes through a cycle of copy work, vocabulary, and dictation. The goal is that when finished (it’s a full school year’s worth of writing), your child will have memorized Philippians 2:1-18 (ESV), and have better handwriting! I’m really looking forward to trying this with my girl!

Raising Rockstars Kindergarten $10

I mean really, score. Carisa‘s curriculum’s are amazing. AMAZING. She is a gift to the blogosphere for any parent who is looking for great learning resources for their babes. I’ll be doing this one with my son over the summer and the preschool version with my 4 year old.

ABC’s for Godly Girls & Boys $8 each

The reason I like this Bible Curriculum is because of the flash cards. Take a look…

I’m going to fire up my laminator and use the girl flash cards with Ella (the 7 year old). To me, the $8 is well worth these colorful scripture cards, even though there is so much more to the curriculum! Each lesson in the eBook includes a character trait (A is for attitude) , a primary Bible verse, a bonus verse, a key Bible character, a lesson, an activity idea, and a craft idea. This could be used for some great one-on-one time with your babes.

4 Moms of 35 Kids Answer Your Parenting Questions $7.99

I mean HELLO! I LOVE hearing from older, wiser women who have gone before me in raising children. And a Q & A format to boot? Perfect, in my opinion. For each question, each mom gives an answer of what her family has done (so there are different opinions/ideas, not a formalistic approach). Brilliant I tell you. Here are some of the questions:

How do you keep things fair for all your children?

How do you teach your children to do chores?

How do you teach your children about the birds and the bees?

And SO many more! This is a wonderful resource for any mama!

The Rhythm of Rest 2.99

Why did I add this eBook? Because I’M A MOM. And, you know, I tend to not “honor” rest. Also, what does “honoring rest” even mean??

I just love Danielle’s spirit, and this eBook is a lovely offering for the mama (or any woman) who could use some practice in what it means to honor the rhythm of rest. This eBook includes Danielle’s stories, tips, and “Take a Breathe” journaling exercises to help you enter the Rest.

 …

Now tell me, what are some of your favorite eBooks on parenting and/or education?

Love, SM

Affiliate links are in this post. If you purchase anything through my blog, I’ll get a portion of the sale, so thank you!

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“Your greatest contribution to the kingdom you may be tucking in bed each night.” -Wes Stafford

Here is what I remember of my normal, every days as a child:

Bologna sandwhiches and Full House.

Having to play cars with my brother.

Picking up sticks.

Washing the bathtub.

Mac & Cheese or Beefaroni dinners.

Eating alone, while watching T.V.

Playing with friends.

Playing alone in my room.

I have no recollection of any intentional time being spent on me as a child. Time that involved teaching me, nurturing my soul, walking alongside me, explaining life in gentle, age-appropriate ways, engaging with my life and my thoughts and my troubles. This isn’t a slam on my parents so much as it is a commentary to how many families “raise” their children, not knowing how to parent intentionally, being tired or overwhelmed, or too busy, or who knows what.

Read the rest over at (in)courage today!

Love, SM

P.S. The winner of the Desperate Gift Pack is Lynne B., the winner of the lovely Grace & Gratitude Collection is Gina, and the winner of Sparkly Green Earrings is Rebekah! Congrats!

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