Little Merry Sunshine

New Experience #98: Little Merry Sunshine Joins ChicagoNOW!

2013-11-17T15:18:00.001-05:00

Effective today, November 17, 2013, Little Merry Sunshine has joined ChicagoNow, the blogging platform of the Chicago Tribune Media Group.

Writer Jessica Gardner describes this move as an enormous honor and opportunity. "It has always been my dream to become a published writer and this opportunity to partner with ChicagoNow is the first step towards making that dream a reality. I am thrilled and honored to be associated with such a notable publication. Little Merry Sunshine will be exposed to a much wider audience and that presents endless opportunities."

As you may recall, Little Merry Sunshine has previously been recognized by the Chicago Tribune. In March 2009, LMS was named one of Chicago's Best Blogs and then appeared on the front page of the Tribune online on April 17, 2009.

These were enormous honors and and joining ChicagoNOW is the logical next step.

The original Little Merry Sunshine site will not disappear. The articles and all of your comments will continue on into perpetuity. New Little Merry Sunshine blog posts will appear at ChicagoNow.com/Little-Merry-Sunshine. Please bookmark the new site.

This will be the last post on the original Little Merry Sunshine blog. The first Little Merry Sunshine post on ChicagoNOW will appear on Monday, November 18th.

What does this mean for current Little Merry Sunshine readers?

If you receive LMS via email, your subscription has been moved to the new blog on ChicagoNOW. You don't need to take any action.
If you read LMS via a reader, you'll need to grab a new feed. You can do that by visiting the new site here.
If you read LMS on the website, please update your bookmarks and visit the new site.
If you link to LMS on your website or blog, please update your links to direct readers to the new Little Merry Sunshine.
And if you haven't done so already, please like Little Merry Sunshine on Facebook.

What does this mean for Little Merry Sunshine and me?

I still own all of my content. It will simply live on the ChicagoNOW site.
Being part of the ChicagoNow network means that I will be exposed to many more readers.

I make this promise to you: You've been a loyal reader since I began blogging on July 1, 2007. You've stuck with me during my down periods and times when I had no idea if I could write anymore. You have always come back. That means the world to me and I'm grateful for each and every one of you. I will not forget you and I will not let you down.

Little Merry Sunshine will continue to be all the things you love. I'll talk about my 100 New Experiences, what inspires and/or amuses me, politics, sports, dreams, Sammy and Zoey, and much more. Hopefully, I'll continue to be funny sometimes. At least for a little while, however, I'll probably cut back on some of the more personal things I've written about here. At least until I get my footing.

I hope you'll follow me over to ChicagoNOW and continue the conversation.

BTW, that's 73 of 100 New Experiences completed!

I'll Have What She's Having

2013-11-17T10:48:00.001-05:00

From Odds & Thens, "My National Film Registry Nominations"

One of my all time favorite movies is When Harry Met Sally. I love every single scene in it. I love how demure college co-ed Sally is at the beginning and the mostly confident woman she becomes throughout the movie. I love how obnoxious Harry is at the beginning and the way he softens, but never truly loses his over-the-top nature, by the end.

If you haven't seen the movie, I strongly encourage you to stop reading right this minute, stream the movie from Netflix, and then return to LMS when you're done.

By all accounts one of the most iconic scenes in the movie happens over a casual lunch between Harry and Sally at Katz's Delicatessen. To refresh your memory, here it is.

A couple of days ago, a comedy troupe in New York went back to Katz's Deli and recreated the scene, flash mob style.

WARNING: Do not eat or drink anything while watching this video. There is an increased chance of choking on it or spewing it all over your computer screen while laughing hysterically. I also hope you have strong bladder muscles.

Want some insider baseball on how the orgasm scene came to be? Read this.

Now can someone pass me a cigarette?

P.S. If you haven't done so already, please "like" Little Merry Sunshine on Facebook.

PSA: Fun Trends in Computer Viruses: Ransomware!

2013-11-16T19:09:00.001-05:00

I care deeply about each and every one of my readers and to show my love and affection for you, I always want you to stay safe.

In that spirit, I share with you what our Chief Information Officer shared with us this week.

Over the past two weeks, 3 nefarious and increasingly virulent approaches to holding your computer data hostage, with requests for up to $300 to get it back have become. Since this could impact not only your professional data but your personal data as well, please read through this note, including the 4 bullets under “details,” and (since not everyone reads every e-mail) please mention it to your team mates. This is of high importance for everyone to know.

Bottom Line On Top:
Whenever you use any computer (work or personal), only browse to safe sites and don't open attachments from people you don't know.

If you're at work and don't know if a site or attachment is safe, contact your IT Support department.
If you're working on your personal computer and don't know if a site is safe, make sure your antivirus software is updated and will tell you of potentially unsafe sites (McAfee does this). You can also scan attachments.

Details:

3 "ransomware" scams have recently seen significantly increased activity:

An actual phone call from "Microsoft" letting you know that your computer is infected, with a "technician" willing to walk you through the process to "repair" it.
An "FBI virus" that tells you that you've been perusing smut, and letting you know that the Federal government needs you to take action.
And the worst of the lot: a "CryptoLocker virus" that poses as a US or FedEx delivery email notification encrypts the files on your PC (and any network you're on), giving you and the entire network 3 days before the data is lost forever.

Please do not browse to sites that do not receive a green check mark next to it from your anti-virus software. This example contains the different icons you might see next to a web search. The green checkmarks from McAfee indicate that the site is secure. The question mark indicates that the site is questionable. The red x indicates that the site should be avoided because it is dangerous.

Do not open any attachments or click on any links in an email that are not from sources you trust and/or which do not specifically relate to business you are conducting (either personally or professionally).
If you're not sure if you can spot spam, take this short quiz my company put together last year. I promise the link in the last sentence is safe.
Finally, below is an email from a colleague of my CIO explaining some of these issues in more details.

Email received by my CIO from an IT colleague:

Subject: ✳Tech Talk: Give me $300 within 3 days or I'll encrypt all your files...

Tech Talk

Technology tips you can use, from people you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have.

Just when you thought the writers of viruses couldn't get any more evil, they do.

I'm talking here about computerized extortion.

The subject line of this Tech Talk describes a "ransomeware" virus called CryptoLocker that surfaced last month and has steadily spread. CryptoLocker will encrypt files on your computer and then pop-up a message that you have 3 days to send a ransom of $300 to the hacker. If the ransom is not sent, the files remain encrypted and the unencryption key is destroyed, rendering the files unrecoverable. CryptoLocker conveniently provides a countdown clock that shows how much time is left before the files are destroyed and provides detailed instructions of how the ransom is to be sent.

The virus is spread through something we've written about before called a "phishing attempt." You'll get an email from FedEx or UPS, or some other respected company that contains an attachment (a ZIP file). After opening the file, your computer is infected. Any USB drives, external drives and even the network drives the computer is attached to can be encrypted with the ransomware.

What Can I do?

Although this Tech Talk describes a particular virus, you can guard against it in the same way you can guard against other viruses - practice "safe" computing.

Be very cautious about opening email attachments. Large companies typically do not send out emails with attachments.
Make sure that you back-up all important files to an external drive (or if you're at work, save your work to your work network because your IT department regularly backs it up and can simply wipe your computer back to its original state with no important work lost.)
Run anti-virus programs at home and keep them up-to-date.

Want to read more about CryptoLocker? Here are some links:

NaBloPoMo - I'm Half Way There

2013-11-15T23:18:00.000-05:00

It's November 15th and that means I'm at the mid-point NaBloPoMo or National Blog Post Month.

In the past 15 days, I've shared stories about my plans to write daily, the Plank Pose Challenge (which I've had to take a break from this week, but I'll be back at it tomorrow), Calvin & Hobbes, menopause, my plans to buy Michael Jordan's house next week, the awesome shit my friends say that keep me in stitches, all that I'm grateful for, and five new experiences (here, here, here, and here), and becoming a multi-millionaire thanks to the kindness of a stranger in China.

It's felt great to be writing regularly again because writing relaxes me. It helps me process life, even when I'm writing about completely inane topics, and it often forces me to question my own beliefs as I try to explain them.

I guess, in short, writing keeps me sane.

What do I have planned for the next 15 days?

Among other things, I've got a major announcement planned for Sunday, I'll be sharing details of my trip to Springfield and the Abraham Lincoln Presidential Library and Museum, a computer virus warning from my company's CIO, and many new adventures that I have yet to share with you.

I hope you're enjoying NaBloPoMo as much as I'm enjoying it. See you tomorrow.

My Week Just Keeps Getting Better and Better

2013-11-14T23:12:00.001-05:00

I just checked my work email (don't lecture me because you do it at night too) and discovered that I never have to work again.

It seems that I've come into a boatload of money. By boatload, I mean a boat the size of three aircraft carriers. I am about to be a $30 millionaire! That's right.

Now, frankly, this happens to me on a regular basis. In 2013 alone, I've been the recipient of at least three or four $10 million plus inheritances from complete strangers who have somehow come across my work email address. Most of them say they're contacting me because they believe me to be a Good Christian, but tonight's benefactor seems to be okay with the fact that I'm just a plain old sinful heathen. He just wants to give me this money.

And I'm perfectly willing to accept it.

Here's the letter I received tonight. Yes, it's perfectly acceptable to be jealous of my incredible fortune. I've redacted Mr. Chen's email address so you can't attempt to get your paws on any of my money.

Good Day,

I found your email discreetly during my personal search for a reliable partner that can be trusted to have this transaction done with me,someone who can assist me in this great time of need, someone who can help me out with this transaction. My name is Mr. Chen Jiang, I am contacting you concerning a deceased customer and an investment he placed under our banks management.

On November 6, 2003, a British Oil consultant/contractor with the Chinese Solid Minerals Corporation, Made a numbered time (Fixed) Deposit for twelve calendar months, valued at US $30,000,000.00 (Thirty Million United States Dollars) in my branch. Upon maturity, I sent a routine notification to his forwarding address but got no reply.

After a month, we sent a reminder and finally we discovered from his contract employers, the Chinese Solid Minerals Corporation that he died from an automobile accident. On further investigation, I found out that he died without making a WILL, and all attempts to trace his next of kin was fruitless. I therefore made further investigation and discovered that he did not declare any kin or relations in all his official documents, including his Bank Deposit paperwork in my Bank. This sum of US $30,000,000.00 (Thirty Million United States Dollars) is still sitting in my Bank and the interest is being rolled over with the principal sum at the end of each year. No one will ever come forward to claim it.

I would respectfully request that you keep the contents of this mail confidential and respect the integrity of the information, will be of great benefit for both of us, I will give you good update as regards this transaction as soon as you notify your interest. I hope to read from you, thank you.

I will like you to provide immediately your full names and address so that the attorney will prepare the necessary documents and affidavits that will put you in place as the next of kin of USD $30,000,000.00 (Thirty Million United States Dollars). The money will be paid into your account for us to share in the ratio of 50% for me and 50% for you.

There is no risk at all as all the paperwork for this transaction will be done by the attorney and my position as the Branch Manager guarantees the successful execution of this transaction. If you are interested, please reply immediately via my private email address:

Awaiting your urgent reply via my private email address:

Regards,
Chen.

Obviously, this is a fully legitimate offer*. I mean, Mr. Chen tells me that his "position as the Branch Manager guarantees the successful execution" of the transaction. So I sent off all my personal information immediately.

*This is definitely NOT a legitimate offer and should you receive offers like this, I strongly encourage you to delete them immediately. The old adage of "it sounds too good to be true" is completely true when it comes to emails like this. They are always scams. Never never never send these people your name and address. And under no circumstances whatsoever should you ever send them your bank account information. You will not receive any money and stand to lose whatever money you have with non-existent odds of getting it back.

It's Been One of THOSE Days

2013-11-13T23:02:00.000-05:00

If you read Little Merry Sunshine regularly, and you should, you'll remember what an incredible day I had yesterday - standing on the ledge of the Sears Tower, meeting Ben Bradley, and then dinner at Coco Pazzo after my work conference.

I don't say that to brag, it's simply a fact. On a scale of 1 to 10, yesterday was a 12.

And then today began.

After kind of a fitful night of sleep that resulted in a migraine this morning, I woke up about 6am to discover this tweet from Ben Bradley. Seriously, how incredibly gracious is he?!

Honestly, how in the world could my day improve after that tweet? I was certain that today had peaked at 5:15, before I was even awake. Because of the migraine, I decided to go back to sleep for a couple of hours.

I got to work about 9:10, still on Cloud 9 from yesterday's awesomeness and the early morning tweet, and a number of my coworkers wanted to hear all about it, so I got to relive it all again.

Fast forward to 2:30 when I took a call resulted in the achievement of a 4 1/2 year dream and goal (New Experience #???). I can't tell you what it is just yet, but all will be revealed on Sunday, November 17th, so mark your calendars now.

I've shared the big news with a select group of friends, so if you know, please don't spill the beans. I'm trusting you. And please don't guess in the comments or on Facebook. Just trust me, this is big.

Finally, tonight, I achieved another goal when I became a Deputy Voter Registrar (New Experience #131). So if you or anyone you know wishes to get registered to vote, you live in Illinois, and you're a U.S. Citizen, let's talk.

This is the Deputy Voter Registrar Oath I took and signed tonight.

That means today, I had two more New Experiences and I've now got just 27 to go to meet my new goal date of December 31st. And on a scale of 1 to 10, today was a 15.

What a Day! New Experiences #26, 141, and 143

2013-11-13T00:59:00.000-05:00

I attended a conference in Chicago today that ended about 3:30, which left me with two free hours before I was scheduled to meet up with my friend Amy for dinner. With this incredible amount of free time on my hands and the clearest day in Chicago I can remember in ages, I knew there was only one thing to do: stand on the ledge of the Sears Tower.

It was time to overcome my fear of heights and, quite literally, step out on faith, 103 stories about Chicago in the tallest building in North America.

Now before you point out that the Sears Tower is now the Willis Tower and that today some snotty committee with a strong New York bias declared the new World Trade Center is the tallest building in the United States, let me just say that I do not care about either of those things, although the news about the Second City once again being the Second City does sort of come into play in this story.

Because it was 3:30, I knew that I had to hustle if I was going to make it to the Observation Deck before sunset at 4:32 p.m.

As I arrived at the Sears Tower, the first thing I saw was the ABC7 news truck sitting outside the building. I immediately wondered if my secret crush Ben Bradley (who is NOT the grandson of Ben Bradlee as I believed for too many years) might be in the near vicinity, but quickly forgot about it as I was so focussed on my goal and on not being nervous, which I was.

I hustled up the Sears Tower and not at all disappointed. Now I remember visiting the Tower when I was a kid, but somehow, it was always a bit hazy and visibility was limited. But not today. Looking southeast, I could see all the way around the curve in Lake Michigan through Indiana and into Michigan. When I looked straight east over the lake, I could see Michigan. Looking north, I'm fairly certain I saw Wisconsin, although there's no sign marking the air border.

Finally, it was time to head over to the west side of the building and face my fear head on. I had survived a faster than a speeding bullet elevator ride up 1,353 feet into the air and I would not be stopped.

And then I saw Ben Bradley. He was obviously there to file a live report about me overcoming my fears, my 100 New Experiences List, and how I was going to squeeze 32 new experiences into the next 7 weeks before December 31st.*

Ben Bradley reporting on my 100 New Experiences. Or maybe that whole World Trade Center vs. Sears Tower thing.

As he filed his initial reports on air, I took some pics and video and then stepped out onto the ledge. I'm telling you, it was truly one small step for this woman and one giant leap for womankind (apologies to Neil Armstrong). Sure, I had some anxiety and needed to take a few deep breaths, but I did it. I also got to see a gorgeous sunset from the ledge.

As I step out onto the ledge. Look at those buildings below me.

See, I'm really standing ON the ledge. Those are my boots.

Proof that I did it! New Experience #69. (On the list, it's #26)

Then I walked over to ~~be interviewed by~~ hear Ben file his report about the tallest building in North America decision on Channel 7. When he was done and packing up, I was able to get his attention and tell him what a fan I am. Surprisingly, I was even coherent. He was super nice, introduced himself and shook my hand. So I asked if he'd take a picture with me, to which he said of course.

Meeting ABC 7's Ben Bradley. New Experience #70. (On the list, it's #141)

After we took a couple pictures, I explained that he would be featured on my blog tonight and that he was Experience #70 of my 100 New Experiences this year. He thought that was cool, asked me to tag him, and then said about being Experience #70, "don't tell my wife." If you ever have a chance to meet Ben Bradley, I highly recommend it. He could not be more gracious.

Sunset from the Sears Tower. Not too shabby.

During a completely delightful dinner with Amy at Coco Pazzo (New Experience #71. On the List, it's #143.), I tried three new foods: Octopus, Clams, and Pistachio Mousse (New Experience #15, parts 15-17).

The best part of my year of 100 New Experiences? New friends.

29 New Experiences left to go.

*Ben Bradley was not at the Sears Tower to file a live report on the ABC 7 News about me stepping out onto the ledge, conquering my fears, completing my 100 New Experiences List, or how I was going to squeeze 32 new experiences into 7 weeks. Although, how damn cool would THAT have been? He was there to file news reports on the farce that was the decision about the WTC being taller than the Sears Tower.

100 New Experiences: 7 Month Update

2013-11-12T00:53:00.001-05:00

I've been working on my 100 New Experiences list for exactly seven months today and I've had 68 new experiences so far!

WOW.

So I have a new goal: 100 by December 31st and 150 by April 10, 2014.

Yep, you read that right. I've upped the ante 50%. Not to worry, I've got a plan.

By November 17th, I'll reach 73 New Experiences:

Reupholstering my dining room chairs (#29)
Hiking Lake County (#97)
Become a Deputy Voter Registrar (#131)
Apply to become a Notary Public (#132)
Build a futon (#138)

By November 24th, I plan to reach 76 New Experiences:

Workout everyday before work for 1 week (#80)
Visit the Abraham Lincoln Presidential Library & Museum (#56)
Get my personal Inbox to ZERO (#66)

By December 1st, I will have had 81 New Experiences:

Complete the Plank Pose Challenge (#125)
Complete NaBloPoMo (#126)
Visit the Illinois Holocaust Museum (#46)
Try acupuncture (#107)
Open an Etsy store (#69)

By December 7th, I will reach 85 New Experiences:

Make curtains for my guest room (#119)
Move Little Merry Sunshine to its own domain (#98)
Pay off someone's layaway at Walmart (up to $100) (#77)
Climb an indoor rock climbing wall (#99)

By December 14th, I will reach 90 New Experiences:

Visit Zoolights (#109)
Visit the Chicago Cultural Center (#127)
Stand on the ledge at the Sears Tower (#26)
Find 2 more new experiences for this week

By December 22nd, I will have had 95 New Experiences:

Visit the Milwaukee Art Museum (#103)
Dine at the Hob Nob Supper Club (#60)
Have dinner at the Heartland Cafe (#136)
Visit the Field Museum (#35)
Have one more new experience this week

By December 31st, I will reach my goal of 100 New Experiences:

Ice skate at Millennium Park (#102)
Go to the Green Mill (#115)
Serve dinner in a soup kitchen (#41)
Visit the Museum of Science & Industry (#30)
Sing karaoke (#19)

And there you have it. That's my game plan for the next 6 1/2 weeks. Want to join me on any of my adventures? Let's team up!

New Experience #130: Visit Santa

2013-11-10T23:30:00.000-05:00

Yesterday after my annual Christmas lunch at The Walnut Room in Marshall Field's (don't tell me it's Macy's because it's not) with Tony, Christopher, and Lyletta, I did something I haven't done since I was a kid.

I stood in line and had a one-on-one chat with Santa.

I should have known things weren't going to go well for me. The signs were everywhere. Notice that Chris and Tony are on the list, but my name is missing.

No matter what the List said, I had a few things to discuss with Santa.

First, I asked about the Easy Bake Oven he promised me when I was 5. His reply was that now we cook with microwaves and why in the world would I want an oven that runs on a lightbulb. Not the point, old man.

Second, I asked about the Man I asked for in 2007. He acted like he wasn't familiar with my written request. I really should have brought my letter, but I forgot it. I swear to you, he must be getting senile.

After we took some pictures, I got down to my real business. I explained how good I've been all year and when he asked me what I wanted for Christmas, I had no problem telling him.

1. A job promotion;
2. A salary increase to match the promotion;
3. A husband;
4. A man for Chris (but not the one who will be my husband);
5. The Easy Bake Oven I have waited 37 years for; and
6. A pony.

He told me he couldn't help me with items 1 through 4, but he could bring me a My Little Pony or a unicorn. And then he gave me a button.

REALLY?

So what Santa basically told me was that I have a better chance getting a mythological horse with a horn sticking out of its forehead than a husband. Awesome.

Although the chat didn't go exactly as I'd imagined, I'm glad I had a chance to visit with Santa.

My favorite part of the whole visit came when I was flipping through the pictures later last night and realized that the picture above looks almost identical to the picture of Santa and me when I was four and he showed up at my Christmas party. I sat on his lap and counted off my Christmas Wish List on my fingers, after walking right up to him and declaring, "Welcome Santa! I just want to shake your hand!" Yep, I was a little precocious. I'll have to get the pic from my mom's and then you'll be able to see how 38 years later, not much has changed in my life.

Today I'm Grateful For . . .

2013-11-09T09:49:00.000-05:00

This has been a crazy week. There's been a lot of work drama. I've lost count of the people I've personally known who have died this week or people I'm close to who have lost someone significant. I'm working through some tough personal stuff.

Through it all, however, what I'm focussed on is all that I'm grateful for. The list is long, so you might want to get comfortable.

I'm grateful for the ability to laugh at the outrageous. Sometimes the options are to laugh or cry and I find myself choosing "laugh" more and more these days.

I'm grateful for the Affordable Care Act. Because of it, mental health care now has parity with physical health issues. What does that mean? Your insurance company can't set crazy lifetime limits on care or say that you can only seek a certain number of treatment sessions if you're depressed. Treating mental illness is not "one size fits all." Thanks also to the ACA, women's health care now includes guaranteed coverage for reproductive care. This is a huge step forward.

I'm grateful for my health. Yes, I have hypothyroidism and yes, I've got a certain amount of weight to lose, but in the overall scheme of things, I'm healthy. And when I get ill, I can go to the doctor and not worry I'm going to go bankrupt or choose between paying medical bills and my mortgage.

I'm grateful for my family. Well, most of them. I'm grateful for my mom, my dad, my brother, and most of my extended family. They're pretty awesome and supportive. Hell, I'm grateful for the rest of them too. I'm grateful that they taught me what love is not.

I'm grateful for my friends - the new ones and the ones I've had for years. They love and support me all the time. They are witty and keep me in stitches. They are fun and adventurous and never let me take myself too seriously. These are the folks who make sure I never get too big for my britches.

I'm grateful for Sammy and Zoey. There's just something about pets that brings about immediate calmness. I give them full credit for my blood pressure remaining constant in the healthy range. Without them, the crazy Type A side of me would win.

I'm grateful for Betsey and Ross before them. They taught me how to love unconditionally. They broke my heart when they died, but I needed the lesson on how to recover from it, in that moment. Without it, I would never have survived the Summer of 2012.

I'm grateful for my job. Each day is an adventure and interesting. Today was one of the really good days.

I'm grateful for my presentation skills. They say that one of the greatest fears most people have is public speaking, but I've never been afraid to present to groups of people. I freak out about preparing my presentation, but actually presenting doesn't faze me in the slightest. That played out today . . .

I'm grateful for the mentorship my friend Tim has given me over the past six years. He's helped me grow into the alumni relations professional I am today by challenging me at every step and always demanding better of me. We've known each other for almost 25 years and he's always believed in me and seen more in me than I've sometimes been able to see in myself.

I'm grateful to be able to finally see myself through the lenses my forever friends have been looking through for many years.

I'm grateful to finally be learning how to better handle my stress and anxiety through yoga, mindfulness, journalling, and therapy. It took me 42 years, but I finally figured out that asking for help is not a sign of weakness.

My Friends Say the Darndest Things

2013-11-08T10:00:00.000-05:00

Over the past couple of days, my friends have said things to me that, 36 hours later, still have me laughing so hard my sides hurt.

First up, Tony. He posted the following description of his day on Facebook.

"I feel like I have been standing all day in a room filled with 111 flying monkeys flinging feces at me."

Yep, I feel you, Tony. I had that day yesterday too. It was hard. But you put it into words far better than I could.

Next up, Amy. She'd been out late the night before and I sent her a text yesterday morning asking how she was feeling. About six hours later, I received this text in return.

"Like I got eaten by a coyote & shit off a cliff."

Oh, honey. That perfectly describes how I feel sometimes too. I hope you hydrated and good hangover food to ease your pain.

Holy cow, I have some damn funny friends. I just wish I could think of such witty things at the drop of a hat. Without a doubt, I'm going to find ways to incorporate these fantastic sayings into my everyday vernacular. When you hear them, you'll know the origin.

I must keep these people in my life. Thank you for being my friends and for keeping me in stitches.

The House That 23 Built aka My New Home

2013-11-07T10:00:00.000-05:00

You may have recently seen in the press that my beloved Michael Jordan has put his Highland Park, Illinois home on the auction block.

When this news hit the media last month, I posted it on Facebook inviting my friends to join with me and form a coalition to purchase the home. We only need $250,000 between us. It's 56,000 square feet on 7+ acres of property, with an NBA regulation basketball court, infinity swimming pool with private island, PGA regulation putting green, tennis courts, a lake, a full beauty salon, 500 bottle wine cellar (that's enough to get through 2014), and much more. The house has 9 bedrooms, including a 3 bedroom guest house. Plus, it's being sold furnished. This is a bargain.

I figured that if a number of us chipped in, we would easily have enough money for the winning bid and with 9 bedrooms, there would be plenty of space for all of us to live in the house simultaneously. Obviously, we'd need to do this in order to afford the monthly upkeep on it and the property taxes.

Friends came out in droves and, in the end, we formed a Facebook Legal binding agreement through the status and comments among six of us.

One of the new homeowners, Anthony, posted the video below providing us all with a tour of the inside of the house. I don't know about anyone else, but I think it's pretty move-in ready. MJ seems to have been a fairly responsible homeowner and the house is fairly updated.

The auction is on November 22nd, so we'll be in by Thanksgiving. It's going to be the best Thanksgiving ever.

The Menopause: What Your Momma Never Told You

2013-11-06T10:00:00.000-05:00

Disclaimer: Mom, This post is not meant to be disrespectful to you in any way, shape, or form. Nothing in it is a reference to you and the talks we shared once upon a time about my changing body and reproduction. Those talks were excellent and you gave me all the information that was appropriate for my 8-year-old me to know. We continued to speak about it as I grew up, and for that, I'm grateful. You always gave me factual and truthful information. At no time did you attempt to convince me that babies were brought into the word via the sacred belly button. Any information you failed to give me, I earnestly believe you did not know. And how could you? It's not as if Nana ever gave you "the birds and the bees" talk. And Lord knows she never spoke to you about The Menopause. Disclaimer Ends.

And now I return you to your regularly scheduled program.

Did your Momma have "the talk" with you when your body started changing? The one about where babies came from? The one about what's happening to your body, why you're changing in ways you never imagined, and why hygiene is now more important than ever? Mine did. I'm sure yours did too.

As useful as that talk was, let's face it, we could have all learned that stuff where God intended - at slumber parties with our girlfriends who passed down the "knowledge" they learned from their older sisters and in the backseat of Jake Ryan's Red Porsche. We'd have been just fine thank you very much.

But, what would have been incredibly useful and what we aren't going to figure out on our own very easily (or in the backseat of Jake's Porsche) is about that fun time in our later years, when our ovaries become senile and when we mourn the loss of our child producing years. That's right, it would have been super helpful if our Mamma's had talked to us about The Menopause.

Fortunately for you, my dear reader, I realize how important this knowledge is for you, your loved ones, and your changing body.

To that end, I've secured this educational video from 1953 that was created to train doctors on treating women experiencing the malady known as The Menopause. My favorite parts? The ominous music at the beginning left me expecting a knife wielding stranger stabbing me in the shower. I also loved the fact that the movie is narrated by a man because, let's face it, if anyone is an expert on what the female body is doing, it's a man. Finally, I'm really touched by the treatment methods that include sedation for women experiencing The Menopause.

Because the full 22-minute video is so graphic, the video below is the 5-minute highlight reel. It's R rated in a couple places, so be careful if you're watching it at work. If you want to see the full video, click here, but keep in mind that it's NSFW.

I hope this training video makes you more comfortable with your changing body and hormones and that you're now better prepared to experience The Menopause. If it doesn't, may I recommend a stiff drink? I plan to get through The Menopause, when it arrives in a decade or two, by medicating with wine. If you're the loving partner of a woman going through The Menopause, run.

I wish I could say that in the past 60 years, we've come a long way baby, but that would be a lie. Given all the attempts to turn back the clock on women's reproductive health care rights in the Red States, I'm not sure we've progressed at all.

The 30 Day Plank Pose Challenge

2013-11-05T10:00:00.000-05:00

Almost two weeks ago, my friend Kristin posted the 30 Day Plank Pose Challenge on her Facebook wall saying she was going to do it and asking if any of her friends wanted to join in. Without stopping to think of all the reasons why I couldn't possibly do it, I immediately said, "I'm in!" And then I posted it to my own wall asking my friends to join me. Six of them did.

Today is Day 10 for me and I'm now holding the Plank Pose for 60 seconds. I started out at 20 seconds and in 10 days, I've tripled it!

If you've never done Plank Pose, it's hard. It burns. My body sometimes shakes afterwards, although that has decreased.

I know you're wondering why anyone would be crazy enough to take this challenge if it was so miserable. The answer is simple: It makes me strong and builds my Core. Just look at all the muscles that are in use when I plank. From upper arm muscles to core muscles to thigh and calf muscles, plank pose has something for most sections of the body.

Care to start your own Plank Pose Challenge? Here's the schedule:

Day 1 = 20 seconds

Day 2 = 20 seconds

Day 3 = 30 seconds

Day 4 = 30 seconds

Day 5 = 40 seconds

Day 6 = REST

Day 7 = 45 seconds

Day 8 = 45 seconds

Day 9 = 60 seconds (1 minute)

Day 10 = 60 seconds

Day 11 = 60 seconds

Day 12 = 90 seconds (1 ½ minutes)

Day 13 = REST

Day 14 = 90 seconds

Day 15 = 90 seconds

Day 16 = 120 seconds (2 minutes)

Day 17 = 120 seconds

Day 18 = 150 seconds (2 ½ minutes)

Day 19 = REST

Day 20 = 150 seconds

Day 21 = 150 seconds

Day 22 = 180 seconds (3 minutes)

Day 23 = 180 seconds

Day 24 = 210 seconds (3 ½ minutes)

Day 25 = 210 seconds

Day 26 = REST

Day 27 = 240 seconds (4 minutes)

Day 28 = 240 seconds

Day 29 = 270 seconds (4 ½ minutes)

Day 30 = PLANK FOR AS LONG AS POSSIBLE

Day 31 – Forever = Keep Planking to Keep Getting Stronger

Thanks to the Health Matters Facebook Page for creating this awesome challenge.

If you want to get more out of your planks, check out these great tips my friend Wini sent me.

Got the Monday Blues? Do the Calvin & Hobbes Dance!

2013-11-04T09:54:00.000-05:00

It's Monday, which means it's time to go back to work after a great weekend, and you may have the Monday Morning Blues.

Thanks to Scott Kleinberg for tweeting this bit of awesomeness on Friday, it's not humanly possible for you to be blue today. I promise. So watch the video. You'll be very glad you did because let's face it, we all still miss Calvin & Hobbes.

The Calvin & Hobbes awesomeness doesn't stop there, however. On November 15th, Dear Mr. Watterson, a documentary about the impact of Calvin & Hobbes, is being released in theaters. I may get in line now. I see a movie field trip in my immediate future. Who wants to join me in seeing the movie (preferably on opening night)?

For your viewing pleasure, here's the trailer.

A Calvin & Hobbes movie is definitely worth dancing about!

Words of Wisdom

2013-11-03T13:00:00.000-05:00

Two good friends sent me these pictures last week. I needed these words of wisdom because it was a tough week, both personally and professionally.

The good news is that none of it took me down. Both experiences were momentarily tough, but I bounced back faster than ever before. That's growth.

I'm really blessed to have good friends who celebrate life's victories with me and lift me up when life gets tough.

Thanks ladies!

Readers Speak Up! What Do You Want to Read on LMS?

2013-11-02T13:00:00.000-04:00

In yesterday's blog post, I suggested that I might tackle some topics you, my dear readers, were interested in. The idea spoke to me.

So now I'm coming to you.

What would you like to read about on Little Merry Sunshine in November and December?

Each week, in November and December, I'll choose a reader suggested topic and write about it on Saturday.

I'm happy to write about almost anything you suggest, so ask me anything.

There are just a few guidelines:

All requests must be submitted by Thursday so that I have time to research the topic (if needed) and write.
As always, I won't write about anything that could get me fired or anything too personal.
Religion and politics are acceptable topics.

I can't wait to hear what you'd like to read about.

It's NaBloPoMo and I'll Write Every Day in November

2013-11-01T22:01:00.001-04:00

It's NaBloPoMo or National Blog Posting Month, for those of you not in the know.

The idea of NaBloPoMo is that bloggers write and publish on their blogs every single day for a month. It's not as easy as it seems. I haven't posted daily since January 2009, when I posted 38 times in 31 days.

Because I haven't been writing much and I really want to get back into the habit of it, I've decided to take on this challenge as part of my 100 New Experiences (it's item #126). Yes, I know it breaks my rules about "new" experiences being those I've never had or haven't had in more than 10 years, but I'm going to claim it as a new experience anyway.

During the month, I expect I'll catch you up on my 100 New Experiences, share what's on my gratitude list, and tell some stories that have been rolling around my head for some time now. You may see an album of super cute Sammy and Zoey pictures. I may even tackle some of the NaBloPoMo suggested topics from Blogher. If you have requests, I'll consider those too. Who knows where the month will take us.

Get a cup of tea and get comfy. You'll have a lot of reading to do.

The True Cost of Pneumonia

2013-10-16T21:22:00.000-04:00

If you follow me on Twitter or are friends with me on Facebook, you know that I've had pneumonia, bronchitis, and an ear infection in the last three weeks. Fortunately, I'm fully on the mend now and feeling about 95% like myself.

Now that I'm close to well, I've started to notice all the bills arriving from the plethora of doctors, nurse practitioners, x-ray technicians, radiologists, ENTs, and pharmacists who have treated me since September 25th.

Let's take a peek at my bills. These are all retail prices, but of course, BCBS has the established rates they will pay and the rest gets written off by the provider.

4 Prescriptions . . . $235
2 Walgreens Take Care Clinic Visits . . . $178
2 Primary Care Physician Visits . . . $315
1 Chest X-Ray at the Hospital (does not include Radiologist). . . $550
1 Ear, Nose & Throat Doctor Visit . . . $190

TOTAL MEDICAL BILLS RELATED TO PNEUMONIA: $1,468 (excluding the Radiologist)

Fortunately for me, I have great health care insurance. Sure, I have a $2,500 annual deductible on top of my monthly premiums, but once I pay my deductible, I don't owe another penny unless I go outside of the vast BCBS network. Because I'd already fulfilled my deductible requirement, I owe exactly nothing on all of these bills. I don't even owe the difference between what BCBS paid and the actual bill.

I've got awesome medical insurance and I didn't give one ounce of thought about could I afford to go to the doctor. But if I didn't have insurance, I'd have thought long and hard about going to the doctor. Close to $1,500 would have been a very difficult pill to swallow.

And I know that for a fact because there were a number of years, in the not so distant past, when I did not have insurance. I worked for myself and could not afford it. Plus, I had a pre-existing condition that either made it nearly impossible to get or grotesquely expensive. I didn't go to the doctor for preventative care and only went to the doctor when I was sick in dire emergencies, which meant almost never. When I had no insurance, no health care provider gave me discounts. I paid full retail value.

Let's contrast this with the recent experience of my friend Sarah. Sarah lives in Toronto, Canada, where she is fully covered with the universal health care that Canada offers. I know what you're thinking. You think Sarah waits six months to get into the doctor and has to appear before multiple death panels to determine whether she deserves treatment or not. That could not be further from the truth.

When I had pneumonia recently, by coincidence, Sarah had it too. I swear I didn't give it to her. Sarah called her doctor and got in on the same day. In addition, she was allowed to bring her entire family with her so they could receive flu shots. The doctor examined her, diagnosed her, gave her family flu shots, and set Sarah up with prescriptions to make her healthy again.

The only cost Sarah paid for all of this medical care was $84 which was the co-pay for her prescriptions.

$84.

I pay more than $84 in health care premiums monthly in addition to the almost $200 per month I put into my Health Savings Account to cover my annual deductible. So annually, I spend close to $4,000 in out of pocket health care premiums and my deductible. This does not include my dental insurance or vision care.

Quality health care insurance changes lives. People are healthier because they receive preventative care. Preventable diseases are prevented. Chronic diseases are treated at lower costs. They stop worrying about whether Sally's emergency appendectomy will bankrupt them. They have dignity.

It boggles my mind why we spend so much time and energy in the United States arguing about whether or not we should allow everyone to receive quality health care. Do we believe some people are less deserving than others? Who are we to decide that? And how do we decide where to draw that line about who is more deserving and who is less deserving?

Health care is not a luxury. It's not a "nice to have" or an "extra." It's also not an "entitlement" in the condescending, dignity stripping way we talk about entitlements in this country these days. Health care is a human right. Period.

The Affordable Health Care Act (aka Obamacare) isn't perfect. I'll admit that. It's also not the plan I wanted. I wanted Universal Health Care for everyone. For now, we've got the ACA and although it's not perfect, it allows millions and millions of people to get insurance and stop worrying about whether they'll go bankrupt from an unexpected medical procedure. I just wish people would give it a chance. And maybe, one day, the USA will join the rest of the developed world and provide Universal Health Care for everyone.

100 New Experiences: I'm Half Way Done!

2013-10-14T22:44:00.000-04:00

As you know, I set a goal to have 100 new experiences between April 11, 2013 and April 10, 2014. I'm thrilled to share with you that over the weekend, I reached the six month mark and I've also completed 50 of my 100 new experiences. Yay for me! And yay for my incredible time management skills!

At the halfway mark, I can tell you that I've become more confident, less scared, less self-conscious, more adventurous, probably more fun, and I'm definitely thinking outside the box to push myself. I've even been told by a few people that my adventures have inspired them to step outside their comfort zones and try new things. That's the best compliment in the world.

Thank you Amy Guth for inspiring this incredible year of adventure and growth!

In case you were wondering, here's what I've done so far:

2. Vacation by myself and take care of only me. - DONE April 11 - 15, 2013 (Read the blog post)

3. Vacation in Nashville - DONE April 11 - 15, 2013 (Read the blog post)

4. Go on vacation and leave work 100% behind (i.e., don't check email or voice mail) - DONE April 11 - 15, 2013 (Read the blog post)

5. Stand in the center of both the Grand Ole Opry and Ryman Auditorium stages - DONE April 12 and 14, 2013 (Read the blog post)

6. Play Elvis's piano at the RCA Studio B - DONE August 12, 2013 (Read the blog post)

7. Sit on the stage at the Civic Opera House during a performance - DONE June 16, 2013 with Christopher; saw The Second City Guide to the Opera

8. Play with the beluga whales at the Shedd Acquarium - DONE May 18, 2013

9. Take a cooking class - DONE May 21, 2013 at David's Bistro in Antioch

11. Climb the main dune at Sleeping Bear Dunes - DONE August 17, 2013 with Dave

12. Learn a new skill - DONE April 24, 2013 Learned how to make a floral centerpiece

14. Max out my employer match for my 403(b) in 2013 - DONE Increased my contribution to max out the match May 2, 2013

21. Take the ferry from Milwaukee to Muskegon - DONE August 16, 2013 & August 24, 2013

40. Have High Tea at the Peninsula Hotel - DONE June 2, 2013 with Lisa and Kim

44. Attend the Book of Mormon - DONE October 6, 2013 with Laurie

48. See Oklahoma at the Civic Opera House - DONE May 3, 2013

50. Pet the stingrays in the Stingray Touch exhibit at the Shedd Aquarium - DONE May 18, 2013

51. Use my Passport - DONE July 6-7, 2013 with Christopher

52. Sit in the 3rd row for the Joan Baez and Indigo Girls Concert at Ravinia - DONE June 9, 2013 (Thanks Jeff!)

53. Have drinks at the Trump Tower Terrace Bar - DONE June 16, 2013 with Christopher

54. Visit Niagara Falls - DONE July 6-7, 2013 with Christopher

55. Make homemade Granola - DONE May 27, 2013 (Read the blog post)

57. Kayak to Camp Lookout and all the way across Lower Herring Lake (from the southern most tip to the northern most tip)- DONE August 18, 2013 with Dave

58. Kayak on Lake Michigan - DONE August 24, 2013 with Dave

59. Kayak from Lower Herring Lake through the inlet to Upper Herring Lake - Attempted August 24, 2013 with Dave, but unable to complete because the Inlet was too shallow, the current was too strong in the opposite direction we were going, and there were trees blocking the Inlet; will not try again

61. Have a reunion with my cousin Ginny (have not seen her since 1998) - DONE July 7, 2013

62. Have a reunion with my friend Christy (have not seen her since 1984) - DONE July 21, 2013

63. Have a reunion with my cousin Sharon (have not seen her since sometime in the 1990s) - DONE August 2, 2013

65. Get my work email inbox to ZERO - DONE May 24, 2013 (Read the blog post)

67. Attend the Randolph Street Market - DONE June 29, 2013 with Tony

68. Have a booth at the Allstate Arena Flea Market - DONE August 11, 2013 with Christopher (I made $212 profit!)

71. Have a reunion with my friend Kalee (haven't seen each other since the late 1990s) - DONE April 11 and 14, 2013 (Read the blog post)

72. Meet Crystal Gayle - DONE April 12, 2013 (Read the blog post)

81. Win a game of Words With Friends by more than 400 points - DONE August 19, 2013 (it was less satisfying when I learned I had just played a 10 year old)

83. Visit South Manitou Island - DONE August 21, 2013 with my dad

84. Have dinner at Lovell's of Lake Forest (DONE July 2, 2013 with my dad) and meet Captain Jim Lovell.

85. Attend the First Presbyterian Church of Lake Forest Rummage Sale - DONE May 4, 2013 with Tony

86. Use a Port-a-Potty - DONE May 4, 2013

87. Teach two LinkedIn classes at work - DONE July 23 (LinkedIn 101: Building Your Profile) and August 7, 2013 (LinkedIn 201: Advanced LinkedIn)

88. Take Amy Guth's Crane #693 on adventures - had cocktails at the Trump Tower Terrace Bar, sat on stage at the Civic Opera House, gone to Niagara Falls, rode the Ferry from Milwaukee to Muskegon, climbed Sleeping Bear Dunes, visited South Manitou Island, watched the Watervale sunset, Richardsons Adventure Farm, so far.

91. Recover gracefully from a very embarrassing work faux pas - DONE August 2, 2013 (trust me, this will be a great blog post)

92. Visit the Mars Cheese Castle - DONE August 24, 2013

94. Visit the Shedd Aquarium - DONE May 18, 2013

100. Complete a corn maze - DONE October 12, 2013 with Chris, Alan, Jen, Katie & Steve

106. See the band Alabama in concert - DONE August 30, 2013 at Ravinia

111. Invent a holiday - DONE September 19, 2013 International Stay In Bed and Read A Book Day

112. Eat dirt - DONE September 23, 2013 (Don't ask how or why)

113. Drive a Tesla - DONE October 9th, 2013 Thanks Bobby!! (Read the blog post.)

114. Have pneumonia. DONE September 25th - October 6th, 2013.

116. Play on a Jumping Pillow. - DONE October 12th with Chris, Katie, Steve, Alan, & Jen.

117. Have a new experience that cannot be shared on Little Merry Sunshine. - DONE August 16, 2013

50 new experiences in 6 months. Damn. I'm good.

I also have another 14 new experiences scheduled or in progress now:

13. Increase by savings account by 2 months worth of expenses - In Progress

15. Try 20 new foods: Pork (DONE May 2013), Milk (I've just never liked the tastes), Eggs (I ate them up until 6th grade home ec class) (DONE August 18, 2013), White Fish Pate (DONE August 16, 2013), Cabbage, Kale, & Leek Soup (DONE August 20, 2013), a 7-11 Slurpee (DONE July 11, 2013) (National Slurpee Day), Tim Horton's Donuts (DONE July 7, 2013), Chocolate Cheese Fudge (DONE August 24, 2013), 14 Year Aged Sharp Cheddar Cheese (DONE August 24, 2013), Cheese Curds, Poutine, Ethiopian Food

29. Reupholster my dining room chairs - In Progress

37. Give up Diet Coke (and all soda) for 30 days - This re-starts November 1st!

38. Drink a minimum of 64 oz of water each day for 30 days - This re-starts November 1st!

56. Visit the Abraham Lincoln Presidential Library & Museum in Springfield, IL - Scheduled November 2013

69. Open and stock an Etsy store. My store name is Vintage Frances. Look for it by December 1, 2013.

73. Make at least three new friends - In Progress (2 new friends made)

74. Attend the Chicago Architecture Foundation's Open House Chicago - Will be done October 19-20, 2013

76. Host a Navy sailor from Great Lakes for Thanksgiving - Will apply October 2013

82. Fly a kite - Attempted August 23, 2013, but failed (will try again)

95. Create an awesome list of new experiences for April 11, 2014 through April 10, 2015 (started the list August 25, 2013) - In Progress

97. Complete Hike Lake County with my friends Jen and Alan (see August 12, 2012 blog post; we did not do it last year; best intentions, blah blah blah) - Scheduled August 15 - November 30, 2013 (Hike 1 done 9/8/13 at Independence Grove; Hikes 2 & 3 done 10/14/2013 at Old School Forest Preserve)

108. Take a glass blowing class - Scheduled for November 3rd with Marci

I'm feeling pretty confident that I'll make 100 new experiences before the year is up. Are there any experiences you want to join me in? Just let me know. Life is more fun when it's shared with friends. If you've got ideas for additional new experiences I should have, I'd love your ideas.

New Experience #113: Drive a Tesla

2013-10-09T23:32:00.002-04:00

Bobby's Tesla after I safely returned it.

The Tesla car hood logo.

Last night during my monthly massage with Bobby at Northwest Massage Therapy (go see him and tell him I sent you, trust me), we were chatting as we often do about politics, religion, world events, etc. when Bobby mentions he and his wife recently bought a new car. Then he casually tosses in that it's a $94,000 car.

A what? That's more money than my condo cost and more money than I've ever made in a year.

And then it hits me . . . he bought a Tesla. He'd been talking about it for awhile and I was thrilled they'd finally gotten it.

As he continues to tell me about all the bells and whistles this car has, he says, "would you like to drive it after your massage?" Um, Hell yes! That's not what I said though. I hemmed and hawed thinking, "I could never drive a $94,000 car!"

After my massage, we went outside so I could see the Tesla and so I could go home. Bobby unlocked the car so I see inside and then tells me to get in.

Thinking I'm just going to get in so I can see better, he walked around to the passenger side and got in. He showed me how to turn it on and taps the enormous dashboard screen to adjust the car for his wife (she and I are similar height). Suddenly the seat starts moving forward and up, the steering wheel adjusts, and all the mirrors move into place.

The next word I hear is "drive." So I did. I drove all around the parking lot and then Bobby says, "take a left on Irving Park." Okay.

So I drove to the Schaumburg Regional Airport (about a 5 minute drive).

The Tesla is completely silent and could have almost driven itself. It has a sunroof that is more like a convertible top in the way that it opens the entire roof. It goes just under 275 miles on one full charge and charging it for a month costs about $18, Bobby told me. He also told me that if he's driving from Chicago to Michigan, there are Tesla Supercharger Stations across the country that will charge the car for free and take about 30 minutes to fully charge it. The car goes from 0 to 60 in 4.2 seconds. Don't ask how I know. Take your foot off the gas and the car slows down as if you'd pressed the brake peddle.

I tried to convince Bobby to let me take the Tesla home and he could take my Camry. They're practically the same car, I argued. My powers of persuasion failed me and I drove my Camry home. Trust me when I tell you that driving a Camry after driving a Tesla feels like you're driving a horse and buggy.

I have to tell you, the Tesla is the greatest car I've ever driven. If I could afford a Tesla, I would buy one in an instant.

Thank you Bobby for giving me this awesome new experience!

Hypothyroidism: One Year Later

2013-09-22T21:52:00.000-04:00

Image from The Encyclopedia of Science

Over Labor Day Weekend last year, I went to the hospital with an uncontrollable bloody nose. Because I don't think I'd ever had a bloody nose before and certainly not one that wouldn't stop bleeding for close to 30 minutes, I was terrified as I drove myself the four miles to Lake Forest Hospital's emergency room. When I arrived, I was still bleeding and was a nervous mess.

Of course, the ER doctor was able to stop the bleeding, then did a full exam of my nose and throat, and ran a battery of blood tests that (seriously, MORE blood that they took from my hand with a needle! couldn't they have taken some of the blood I'd just lost?) to make sure I was okay to send home. Unable to find the source of the blood and with a clean blood panel, I was sent home with instructions to come back if it happened again and told to see an Ear Nose and Throat (ENT) doctor for follow-up that week.

When I finally made it to the ENT a couple of weeks later, all went well until he found a 2-inch lump on my thyroid that I didn't know was there. Of course, I also didn't know my thyroid was located at the base of my neck. It didn't hurt and it wasn't impeding my ability to swallow, but he was concerned and sent me for more blood work, an ultrasound, and ultimately, a biopsy.

The ultrasound confirmed that the lump was about 2 inches in length and had completely taken over my thyroid. The blood work confirmed that my thyroid wasn't working at all, which explained a number of physical symptoms that I was experiencing. The best news was that the biopsy came back showing that the lump was completely benign.

To be sure, the two weeks between the discovery of the lump and the results of the ultrasound were the two most miserable weeks of my life. I was an emotional wreck. What if I had cancer? What if it was incurable? I know a number of women who've beaten thyroid cancer and that it's one of the most treatable cancers, but that didn't alleviate the terror I felt that I could die at 41. I was so paralyzed with fear that I mostly kept the whole ordeal to myself. Given that I process things externally, this was quite the feat for me.

Good news in hand, my ENT told me I needed to see an Endocrinologist about the fact that my thyroid didn't work and to determine a course of treatment.

My awesome Endocrinologist sent me for more blood work (yay, more needles!) and then decided that we'd watch my thyroid numbers for a month or two. After two more rounds of blood work that showed my thyroid numbers getting worse each time, it was decided that I would start treatment with Synthroid, a synthetic form of the thyroid hormone.

Finally, my June 2013 round of blood work showed my thyroid numbers back in the normal range, and in August, I realized that I was feeling like me again.

What does "me" feel like? I have almost boundless energy again. I no longer want a nap was 2pm daily. I'm sleeping normally. My skin is in much better shape. My nails are growing again and are no longer brittle. My hair is also no longer so brittle and has stopped falling out. Weight is coming off. My menstrual cycle is like clockwork again.

It was not easy getting to this point. In fact, for months, I believed I'd never feel like myself again. But I did and all those needles were worth it. I still have to have thyroid related blood work, but not nearly as frequently, and I'll be taking the Synthroid for the rest of my life.

Here's what I've learned: Check your neck. Lumps are a big deal, even the benign ones. Your thyroid is located at the base of your neck and it controls an awful lot in our bodies. Metabolism, menstrual cycle, mood, skin, hair, hairs, energy levels, body temperature, and much more. Are you depressed? It may be due to your thyroid. Are you gaining weight and can't figure out why or can't lose weight no matter what you do? It may be due to your thyroid. Has your menstrual cycle gone berserk and you're no where near menopause? It could be your thyroid. I've had zero side effects on Synthroid. It does exactly what it's supposed to do with ease, although it does take a little tinkering with the dosages to get it right.

New Holiday: Int'l Stay In Bed & Read A Book Day

2013-09-19T13:19:00.000-04:00

When I got up this morning, I learned, thanks to social media, that today is Talk Like a Pirate Day. I don't know about you, but I've never been into pirates. Not even Johnny Depp could convince me that pirates are cool.

I'm not going to tell you not to talk like a pirate though. In fact, I think you should do whatever tickles your fancy. I'm all about your right to choose for yourself here. I'm Pro-Choice.

As I showered, dryed my hair, did my make-up, and made important fashion decisions for my day, I could hear many claps of thunder and the sound of pouring rain hitting my roof. I also quickly realized that although it was 7:45 a.m., it looked like midnight outside.

The thunderstorm combined with Talk Like Pirate Day got me to fantasizing about what kind of fake, but widely celebrated holiday would I enjoy and that would have universal appeal.

And thus was born . . .

International Stay In Bed

and Read A Book Day

Here's how it works:

Stay In Bed and Read A Book Day is a floating holiday that can be used by all adults on any regularly scheduled workday. It will not count against any other paid time off you have (e.g., sick, vacation), although it is a paid day off. You get to choose when to celebrate it each year (see, more of that pro-choice thing) so that it fits best into your schedule. Children are strictly forbidden from celebrating because they need to be in school and they have too damn many days off anyway.

In order to invoke Stay In Bed and Read A Book Day, you simply need to email your employer and let them know by 6:00 a.m. local time on the day you are celebrating. You may not provide advance notice.

I recommend you choose a snowy or rainy day so that you are not tempted to get out of bed, but it is up to you. If you want to stay in bed and read on a perfectly nice sunny day, go for it.

That's really all that's required.

Here are helpful FAQs because I know you have questions:

1. Am I required to remain in bed alone? Absolutely not. If you'd like to have company, enjoy!

2. Is there a number of people I'm allowed to have in my bed on Stay In Bed and Read A Book Day? No. As long as they are all consenting adults, you can have a party, in bed.

3. Do I have to read a book or can I read my Kindle or a stack of magazines? Again, it does not have to be a book. You may read your Kindle, the newspaper, magazines, mail, or anything else you'd enjoy reading. The only thing forbidden is work related reading.

4. Do I have to read? Can I engage in other activities in bed? Of course! I encourage it. You may sleep or engage in any other activity that can be done in bed in a reclining position. You may engage in these activities alone or with the companions you have in bed with you, as long as they're consenting adult people.

5. Can I wear a costume when I celebrate? Sure. Feel free. Playing dress up is fun.

5. Is there anything else I should know? Pace yourself. The last thing you want is to over exert yourself and have to call in sick on the day after Stay In Bed and Read A Book Day. That's just bad form.

6. Can I post pictures of my celebration of Stay In Bed and Read A Book Day on social media? Yes. Use the hashtag #StayInBed and please keep the pictures G-rated.

Enjoy!

Reason, Season, & Lifetime Friends - Not a Repeat, a Three-Peat

2013-09-18T01:24:00.001-04:00

I originally wrote this post on February 12, 2008. I published again, almost exactly 12 months later, on February 1, 2009.

Tonight, I'm publishing it for the third time because it still resonates so deeply with me and remains one of my absolute all time favorite blog posts. Five and a half years after its original publication on Little Merry Sunshine, I find myself going through a Season change. Yes, we are literally transforming from Summer to Fall, but some of my relationships are also transforming. Some are ending and others are just beginning. I see it quite clearly; perhaps more clearly than I've seen it ever before in my life.

So it's through the dual lenses of grieving the relationships ending and hopefulness for the ones just beginning, that I share with you my most fundamental beliefs on relationships of all kinds.

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I have always believed there are three types of friends: Reason, Season, and Lifetime. None of them is bad. In fact, they are all equally important.

Reason Friends come into my life for a specific reason - to help me grow, to help me learn a lesson, etc. Once the reason is over, the friendship comes to its natural end. Sometimes work friends fall into this category. We may become very close to Reason Friends and share many intimate details from our lives, but they are still Reason Friends. I usually mourn their departure, but sometimes it's so gradual neither of us notices until it's too late. I also usually hope that our paths cross again.

Season Friends are in my life for a period of time. Some of my friends from college fall into this category. They were there for those 4 years, but after that Season in our lives was over, we went our separate ways. I always mourn when these friendships end because it means a significant time in my life is over, but it is also a time of exciting opportunity. Like Reason Friends, I hope my life path will cross again with my Season Friends.

Lifetime Friends, however, are my touchstones, my lifeblood. Without them, my life is empty. They are there through the thick and thin, exuberance, and sorrow. No matter what happens in our lives, our friendship remains. Sometimes we aren’t as close as others, but we always come back together. The thing about Lifetime Friends is that we can be apart for a decade or more, but when we finally come back together, it's like time has stood still and we pick up right where we left off. Being a Lifetime Friend has nothing to do with when the friendship began. It could be a 40 year old friendship or a 4 week old friendship.

Please don't misunderstand me. I don't treat any of my friends differently. Most of the time, I don't even consciously know which category they fall into.

Because February is the season of Love (and not just the romantic kind), it reminds me to tell my friends how much I love them. I know I don't say it often enough. But I do really and truly love each of my friends. So this Valentine's Day, I'm sending big hugs and kisses your way.

Like Nana, Like Jessica

2013-09-16T19:06:00.001-04:00

I've shared my experiences with Nana visiting me since her death here and here. She visited me again last night/today.

Background: Last night's dinner was Grandmother themed. No, it wasn't all soft foods, suitable for the denture crowd. Dinner consisted of my Grannycago's Grilled Chicken (That's my Gardner Grandma, who lived in Chicago. She hated that name, so I loved it even more.), Nana's Rice, and Christopher's YaYa's Green Beans. My dinner was heavenly and the leftovers are even better. Doesn't this meal look divine?

About midnight, I went to sleep and had a dream about being at Nana's house with both of my parents for the last time. We were cleaning out the house to put it on the market, just as we did almost exactly 12 months ago. In my dream, we were having breakfast when in the door walks Nana. We had a lovely visit, got caught up on the last four years since her death, and then she left.

Okay, now you know the context of what I got up to today.

You should also know the following story about Nana:

About 20 years ago, when Nana was still working at NationsBank (now Bank of America), I would call her almost nightly to check in with her. Sometimes our chats were short and sometimes they were long. Nana was never a complainer, so it struck with me some concern when she began complaining in all of our calls about how much pain she was in. Every night, she would tell me how badly her feet hurt after work and she just didn't know what to do. Maybe, she would say, it was time to retire (she was almost 80). This went on for at least a couple of weeks. It was hard to hear about all the pain she was in because I was in DC and there was nothing I could do. One night, she got on the phone and just couldn't stop apologizing and telling me how embarrassed and ashamed she was, but didn't mention the pain in her feet. I didn't understand and couldn't imagine what was causing all this embarrassment and shame. Finally, she explained that as she was taking off her shoes that night, a bunch of balled up tissue paper fell out of one and she realized that both shoes had tissue paper stuffed into the toe of each shoe. Her feet were in so much pain because her size 7 triple narrow feet were essentially crammed into size 5 triple narrow shoes.

This morning, I was rushing around getting ready for work and decided that the only shoes that would work for today were some super cute black patent leather flats that also hurt my feet so badly I can barely walk by the end of the day. The things we do for fashion.

I slipped on the flats, looked down and saw what I thought was a piece of white paper towel peaking out of the top of the left shoe. I took it back off and bent down to remove the paper towel only to discover that it wasn't paper towel. It was a huge hard piece of grayish cardboard stuck in the shoes to help them keep their shape. My feet were being pinched by this cardboard.

Needless to say, I couldn't stop laughing. Like Nana, like Jessica.

Then I looked up, thanked Nana for the visit, and told her I look forward to next time.