AKA: Possibly the most ridiculous piece of attire I have ever made…

I actually started making this dress for Sophie Monster because she loves Rainbow Dash but once she saw the CRAZY hooded mane she wanted nothing to do with it, luckily her fashion saavy sister had no problem jumping in.

The dress is made using LBB’s Hooded Shirt pattern & as you can see a few liberties were taken. Aside from short flutter sleeves & a longer flared length the biggest change was that crazy tulle mane on the hood. Here’s a quick recap in case you’re adventurous enough to make one as well! Let me just say if you actually make this My Little Pony Crazy Hooded Dress & you do not send me a picture I am going to be so mad at you!! (I purchased my Rainbow Dash T-shirt that I used for the dress body from here: My Little Pony Rainbow Dash T-shirt but I think H&M kids has a bunch of My Little Pony stuff now too!)

For the hood, first you’re going to need to cut several strips of tulle. I just eyeballed it & sliced off a 3″ wide piece right off the the end of the yardage. It came out to be around 23″ long but honestly you’re going to be trimming these so don’t stress about the length. Next I folded them in half so I had 4 3″x12″ strips of each color, I pinned one on top of the edge of another to create one long piece of rainbow strips. Then using a wide basting stitch I ran the center of the  strips through my sewing machine, this was done just to hold them all together easier.  Right before you get to the step in the pattern where you’re going to sew the hood together you’re going to sandwich your rainbow tulle piece in between the hood pieces so the stitched edge runs along the hooded edge. In other words when you’re sewing the hood pieces together you’ll also be sewing the ‘mane’ into it. Turn it right side out and wah-lah! Instant Insanity. Oh, also after the dress was completed I went back & trimmed down the tulle so that they gradually lengthened much like a real horse mane would. I also curved the edges so they would lay a little better.

Does this ever happen to you? You read or see a recipe that just somehow connects to you on a spiritual gastroenterological level & for days YOU CANNOT STOP THINKING ABOUT IT. That happened to me, our sitter Amy was telling me how she had whipped up a macaroni & cheese dish with brussel sprouts & onions & bacon, OH MY! It sounded like the epitomy of an amazing comfort food dish.

I just had to make it.

So I did.

And IT.WAS.GOOD.

Brussel Sprout, Onion & Bacon Mac Cheese

• 1 pint brussel sprouts, halved if small, quarterd & stems trimmed if large
• 4-5 slices of thick bacon, cut into 1″ pieces
• 1/2 sweet onion, chopped
• 1 & 1/2 cups white cheddar cheese
• 6 slices swiss or white american cheese, cut up small
• 1 tbs dijon mustard
• a few dashes of hot sauce
• 1 tsp salt
• 1/2 cu flour
• 1/4 cu butter
• 2 & 1/2 cu 2% milk
• 1 package (16oz) pasta shells

Preheat oven to 425. Arrange bacon on a large baking sheet & cook for 10 minutes. After that add brussel sprouts & onion to the bacon, toss all the ingredients well so everything is coated with some bacon fat. (mmm, bacon fat) Season with salt & pepper & continue to roast for another 10 minutes or until onions are translucent & brussel sprouts are fork tender.

Meanwhile bring a large pot of water to boil on the stovetop, add a good dash of salt to the water & cook pasta shells according to package directions.

While the sprouts are roasting & the pasta is cooking you’re going to make the cheese sauce. In a large saucepan melt butter over medium heat, next add the flour & continue to cook while whisking constantly for 1 minute. Gradually whisk in the milk & cook over medium heat, while whisking, until the mixture thickens and bubbles. Remove from heat. Add cheeses, mustard, salt & and hot sauce, stirring until cheese melts and sauce is smooth.

Drain pasta shells & return to pot. Pour cheese sauce over shells & gently combine. At this point if you’re serving picky little ones that will freak at the thought of a veggie in their macaroni & cheese then go ahead & set aside their servings. Add everything that’s on your baking sheet to the pasta cheese mixture & gently toss. Pour into an oven proof baking dish & sprinkle with a nice tangy shredded cheese like Parmesan or Asiago. Bake for 10 minutes or until the top is golden & bubbly. Serve immediately & ignore all thoughts of bathingsuit season, just enjoy yourself. (:

Omgosh, I’m so freakin’ tired you guys.

About 2 weeks ago we moved Sophie from her crib to a toddler bed in Sam’s room. Sam had been having trouble with being scared at night & Soph was starting to climb out of her crib so something had to be done. They were actually the ones who came up with the idea to move in together & to P’s & my surprise it’s actually been going pretty well. Far better than I thought it would. They chit chat in the mornings & it’s ridiculously cute of course. They talk about Barbie & Princesses & POOP. It’s always the girly ones that have the worst potty mouths but after last night we now realize the downside of having both of your kids in one room. When one is having a really bad night, BOTH will be having a really bad night. Soph kept waking up saying her leg hurt (such a bizarre complaint, right? she was perfectly fine this morning though) & then when we let her come into our bed to keep her from continuing to wake Sam up, Sam actually woke up because she didn’t want to sleep alone & then the rest of the night ended up being a blur of musical beds.

Just hit me in the head with a brick please.

I did want to blog today though so I thought I’d do something that required minimal brain power & show you pretty pictures.

Oooo! Ahhhh! Do you love them as much as I do? I did a Rainbow Tutu tutorial for a certain mega crafting website that I’m hoping they use & wanted to take some amazing pictures to really get their attention. A colorful tutu at a horse farm seemed like a good idea to me! As soon as I can I’ll share the tutorial.

Hope you guys had a great weekend & get lots & lots of restful sleep. At least one of us should right?

Have a bookshelf that time & time again has stumped you? You’ve tried books but they were…well, boring. Then you did that weird elephant statue & that was just weird, let’s be honest. Fake plants, dumb. Real plants, dead. How about this…

It only took me, gosh, maybe two trips to the thrift shop to find books in ever color. Once you start peeling off those horrible book covers you’d be surprised how pretty the books are that lie beneath. In fact, even if you’re not doing this project I want you to go through your house, find all the books you have that can be seen by anyone walking through your home & take the covers off of them. Seriously, go do it. Like, right now. Trust me, you’ll like the way it looks so much better, and really, what do they need protecting from? It’s not like there’s inclement weather in your house & if there is an act of God in your home the last thing you’re going to worry about is whether or not your books had covers.

Know what I mean?

We all need grace.

We all fall short, despite our best intentions & if we’re lucky, although undeserved, the person we’ve wronged will choose to show us grace.

I’ve learned over the years that this is not my natural inclination. Often when I’m wronged, especially if it’s been by a man, I’ve felt an overwhelming need to stand up for myself. I think, “You can’t let him treat you this way, if you don’t punish them they’ll take advantage of you again.” It’s taken a long time, 33 years of life & 6 years of marriage to be exact, but a little light bulb has recently turned on in my head. I don’t need to act that way, perhaps if I choose to trust that person, to forgive & show grace then that gesture could benefit our relationship far more than standing my ground ever could.

I’ve been shown grace so many times in my life. For me the overwhelming example is the grace God shows me. I certainly don’t deserve it & yet he openly & generously forgives me time & time again. He doesn’t hold it over my head or make me work for it, he forgives as sweetly & generously as I would forgive my own child. In fact, that’s my favorite way to envision God, as a loving father.

I don’t know why I felt compelled to write about this today. Sometimes I feel like my blog has an identity crisis, one day I’m posting about how to make your own DIY maxi dress from used up Target bags (Haha, as if. Ok, maybe…not) & then the next I’m spilling my guts all over the page about forgiveness, mommy stress, or depression. I have this overwhelming urge to share sometimes, when those rare times happen that I actually have some clarity about how make this crazy life a little easier I just want to tell you. It’s also the same thing when I find an awesome new blush or fantastic sewing pattern, sometimes I just have to tell you. I suppose that’s what a blog is all about in the end. As mine grows though I sometimes think about censoring myself so I can fit a certain niche better. So my brand will be more marketable. You know what, that’s DUMB. It may not make me money as much but that’s not what I started this for, I may not have known it four years ago when Samster Mommy launched but I certainly know it now, my calling on here is to be a real person, a real mother, wife & woman & this is a place for real conversation. Sometimes it’s light & fruity & sometimes I want to make you think. Sometimes I just want to toss thoughts out there in hope that one person will read it & go, “Oh my gosh, that is EXACTLY what I needed to hear. I’m so glad I’m not alone.”

So my nugget for today is this, allow yourself to grow in grace. Both by giving it & receiving. Two things I’m trying to constantly work into my life this year are humility & generosity. Emotional generosity. We become jaded, selfish & just plain tired over the years & it’s easy to become stingy with apologies, forgiveness or trust. It’s not easy but I want to peel off some of those layers. I think learning to grow in grace will fit nicely into that plan. Now I just need you to remind of this tomorrow, and the next day, and the next… (:

I don’t even know what words I would choose to describe Sophie Monster…

Spirited, Sweet, Joyful, Silly, Exciting, Loveable…INSANE.

For example, yesterday I was trying to take some beautiful pictures of Soph frolicking in the amazing ‘pink snow’ that’s covering our front lawn right now. (cherry blossom petals for you Floridians) At first she played along…

And then she got a little silly…

And then she spread her legs apart, squatted down & started smacking her crotch repeatedly as if she were in some hoochie mama rap video.

It was really awesome that our overly conservative neighbors pulled in right as this was happening. What fine little citizens we must be raising!

And if that’s not enough I give you the people’s evidence A-G…

P & I both agree that Soph has the potential to be something great, possibly truly amazing…or she could be a serial killer. Jury’s still out.

Above is a little snipit of some some of the items you’ll find in my “MOMMY DEAREST Mother’s Day Gift & Craft Guide” (a little ode to my own mother. Oh wait, so not because she’s like Joan Crawford! Ack! No, I meant because we watched that movie together when I was a kid! Seriously, I swear!!) Ugh, speaking of Nana though…

I thought I’d have my girls try out one of the pins where you use a website to turn your images into coloring pages (by the way one person suggested you just right click & save your coloring book image to bypass the ridiculous membership fee & I’m not saying I endorse that but I am saying I could see how one might be persuaded to do so, I mean, it’s not like the person isn’t making money off of ads from the traffic their getting.) My plan was to use the picture as the front of a homemade construction paper Mother’s Day card for my mom, aka Nana. The problem is…

…Nana looks like a drag queen.

On to the next pin!

You can see all 50 of my Mother’s Day Gift & Craft pins here!

If you’re anything like me when you get a new magazine you dog-ear pages with recipes or projects that look good. In fact when I’m done my magazine won’t even lay flat because of all the folds I’ve made. How often I actually ever go back & try one of those articles is a completely different story. This month’s Better Homes & Gardens might just be different…almost every recipe towards the end looked amazing enough that I’ve actually already tried one & have bought the ingredients to try 3 more! Below is the one I made a few nights ago & it was pretty darn good. It’s kind of a new take on last minute spaghetti you might make & was certainly a great option for when you have no idea what to cook & just need to raid your pantry. The only change I made to the original recipe was I added some sweet italian sausage for a protein.

BH&G’s magazine results

My results

BH&G Artichoke & Tomato Pasta

• 80z spaghetti
• 1/4 cu grated parmesan cheese
• 1/2 cu chopped sweet onion
• 1/4 cu olive oil
• 2 garlic cloves, minced
• 1 28oz can crushed tomatoes
• 1 6oz jar marinated artichoke hearts, drained & roughly chopped
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1/4 tsp fresh ground pepper
• fresh basil (optional)
• 1 package of sweet italian sausage

Cook sausage in oven according to package directions, slice on the diagonal after cooked & set aside.

In a large pot cook pasta according to package directions, drain, RESERVE 1/4 CU PASTA WATER. Return pasta to pot, add cheese, toss to combine, add pasta water as needed while tossing until the pasta is evenly coated with the melted cheese.

Meanwhile, in a large saucepan cook onion in oil over med heat until tender, about 5 minutes. Add garlic, cook 30 seconds more. Add undrained tomatoes, artichoke hearts, salt, and pepper. Cook and stir until slightly thickened. Mash slightly with a wooden spoon.

To serve, top pasta with tomato mixture, sausage slices & basil leaves. Sprinkle with additional Parmesan cheese if desired. Makes 4 servings.

Mmm, just writing this is making me crave it for lunch! I suggest you pick up May’s issue of BH&G if you haven’t already, it’s a good one!

*BH&G is not paying me in any way to mention or recommend their magazine, although I certainly would be ok with it if they wanted to! I’m just a fan. (:

**Also this artichoke tomato recipe from Pioneer Woman sounds DIVINE, I might have to try her way out asap, she uses a bit of cream but hey, a little bit cream never hurt no one.

I could not be happier with the way this project came out! It certainly morphed quite a bit on it’s way from some fuzzy place in my brain to hanging on Sam’s wall but nonetheless I’m so darn excited with the final product! I knew I wanted something that was an image of Sleeping Beauty & was made completely of glitter. Originally, I was hung up on the idea of a full color Sleeping Beauty image but 1- I was having a heck of a time finding flesh colored glitter & 2- I couldn’t quite figure out how to color the different sections of the image without having one glitter color bleed into the next area’s glitter color. This piece is really the backbone of justifying the finished room as a ‘princess room’ to my Disney obsessed 4 year old so I just couldn’t let the idea go. This last trip to Florida however, I was talking it through with my Mom & she suggested I do a silhouette of a princess. DING! DING! DING! Thank you Nana!

For this project you’ll need:

• Framed picture, whatever the image is that’s currently in the frame needs to be on a sturdy piece of cardboard or canvas as this is what you’ll be creating your artwork on.
• Princess Silhouette (I googled ‘Sleeping Beauty Silhouette’)
• Glitter!! Black for the silhouette & the background color of your choice. (Ex: Blue for Cinderella, Gold for Belle or Purple for Rapunzel) I used 3 bottles of Martha Stewart Bubblegum Pink Irridescent Glitter for the background & 1 bottle of Onyx for the silhouette.
• Mod Podge
• Clear Sealant (I used this one by Delta but if I do this project again I might try a spray version.
• Overhead projector (I got super lucky that my neighbor had one I could borrow, ask your friends who are teachers or try to rent one from your local library if you can’t find one. Ask around though, you’d be surprised how many people actually have one of these!)
• Foam brushes

1) Take the picture out of the frame. Mine was a cheap-o printout of tulips & it easily ripped off of the cardboard insert. If you’re going to paint the frame now is the time to do it, I’ve found that spray paint works really, either a color one or the gold or silver metallic spray paints would be great!   2) Paint your background the same color as your background glitter. I painted mine white & as I was glittering the pink I thought to myself, DUH, this would’ve been a lot easier to get great coverage if my background matched my glitter.

3) While that dries get busy on the silhouette. The first step is to print out your image & then carefully cut it out. I found it was easiest to use a pair of super sharp small scissors. Pay close attention to details like the fingertips, these are what really make the princess silhouette recognizable.

4) Project your cutout onto a wall, tape a large piece of paper (a roll of craft paper or even wrapping paper would be great) onto the wall. Adjust the size of the projection by moving the projector closer or further away from the wall & then adjust the focus with the knob at the top.

5) Carefully trace the image using a sharpie marker.

6) Cut out the silhouette.

7) Now it’s time to break out the glitter! You’ll want to work on a surface that can act as a catch all for the excess glitter & then be folded & funnel the glitter back into the bottle. Glitter is expensive, don’t waste it! Once again, wrapping paper or craft paper from a roll should work well. Start off with your background piece, working in small areas & using a foam brush apply a thin coat of mod podge & then sprinkle glitter liberally. Pick the piece up & tap off any excess, move onto the next section. After every few sections refill your glitter bottle with the excess glitter that’s accumulated on the catch-all paper. Once you’ve covered the entire background give it a few more taps & set it aside to dry. It’s ok if there are some sparse spots, we’re going to go back & fill those in later.

8) Using a different foam brush & different work surface paper (mixing glitter colors will majorly mess us your project!) repeat the glittering process with black glitter on your silhouette cutout. Set aside to dry.

9) Go back & re-glitter any sparse areas on the background piece & then on the silhouette piece. Shake both off well to remove excess glitter!

10) Using a new foam brush turn your silhouette piece over & give it a thin coat of mod podge, carefully press the glittered black silhouette onto the glittered background piece. Keep in mind when attaching this that if you get black glitter on your hands you won’t want to touch the pink background. Trust me, once you get black glitter onto the pink it sticks out like a sore thumb & is a pain to cover up! If that does happen to you however after the entire project is done you can go back & using a paintbrush & some more mod podge carefully cover the areas where the black spilled over with more pink glitter.

11) Allow to dry, if some edges are lifting up you can go back with a glue pen or more mod podge & a paintbrush to tack them down.

12) Seal it up! I chose to first seal the pink areas with my clear glaze & a new foam brush & then seal the silhouette areas with more glaze & a separate foam brush. I learned the hard way that if you flick your wrist when spreading the glaze onto the silhouette area you can get black glitter onto your beautiful pink background. It probably would’ve helped me avoid this problem if I had let the glazed pink area dry completely before glazing the black. That way if any black did get onto the pink the dried glaze would keep it from sticking & I could’ve brushed it off. In theory that is. I also toyed with the idea of using an aerosal sealant & carefully spraying the entire picture. I think if you stand far enough away from it than the force of the spray wouldn’t make the black glitter go everywhere. If you try that please let me know!

That’s it!! Place the finished artwork back in it’s frame & hang it up! Sit back & revel in your little girl’s giggles when she sees her new sparkling princess on her wall. (:

*Tip* If you can hang it on a wall that gets direct light, the glitter will really sparkle in the sun!

Oh you know, yesterday was just another Thursday…I took Sam to school, did a load of lights, picked up dog poop, oh yeah, and did a radio interview!

This was so much fun you guys, if you aren’t a current listener of One Bad Mother I highly recommend you get your booty in gear & take a listen because it’s not just a show about motherhood, it’s a show about the ‘REAL’ motherhood, you know the one where you often end up in the bathroom with the door locked taking a ‘time out’? No candy coating here folks, and if you know me at all you know that’s exactly how I like it.

The show I was a guest on was about ‘Taking time for yourself’, when Biz emailed me saying that was the topic I believe my response was, “Umm, if I had that figured out there’d be no need for all this vodka in my house”

I tried my best though to give my thoughts on the topic, you guys have to take a listen, just press play on the audio below. That’s the show in it’s entertaining entirety but if you’re pressed for time my interview is at 49:50