Simple, Pure, and really, really cute - Lively Innocence

Belated Happy New Year!

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 02:33:00 +0000

it's been nearly 2 months since I've updated this old blog.

anyway, like I said before, I'll be updating this blog but not as often as I used to...

I did set up a new blog though, it's located here: http://blog.elysiasilvermoon.net

also, I hope that the new year will bring more prosperity and hope to everyone. Happy New Year! =D

Switching bloghosts

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 06:39:00 +0000

For 6 years this blog of mine has been a host to a lot of events in my life, even though I don't update it frequently these days. Right now, since I just got my first salary from my job, I think it's about high time to switch.

I love blogger, and I've seen it evolve through thick and thin, and it went through a heck of a lot of changes, most recently the new google+ like interface and what not, but I stayed loyal to it until now.

However, times do change and I guess we gotta move forward to bigger and better things. Even though I am still using blogger's old html-based template editing, I still find it quite hard to edit my blog with regards to design. It's also probably the reason why my blog is stock in V8 and not going to V9.

I also want my blog to also contain a wiki of sorts, filled with nothing but random thoughts blurting from my brain. From politics to religion, from science to arts, from anime to manga, from computers to programming, I don't think a blog is enough for this (and no, using fb as a way to express myself is a bit too risky these days lol).

Finally, I just want a domain of my own. A website that I can call my own. I know that I can place my domain name into blogger, but it just doesn't feel as if this blog is my own. I mean sure I made this blog, heck I was the one who designed this template, but I do think that since there a ".blogspot.com" added beside my online name means that the site is not fully mine. I do want my own space, although hosted at a hosting company, but at least that hosting company doesn't "own" the domain, since I could just lease it fair and square.

Cut the story short, I'm switching blog hosts. I'll be running a wordpress blog and a bliki (personal wiki) on a paid server. I'm not sure if I could migrate my blogposts from here to there but it doesn't really matter. I'll keep this blog up until probably when blogger dies, which I doubt will happen in the long run.

It's been six magical years dear blog, but don't think of it as saying goodbye, think of it as... "see you later"

See you guys around! I'll be posting the url of my new blog and bliki once I get it up and running. ja ne~

Humility.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sun, 20 Nov 2011 13:58:00 +0000

I know that you love me.
I know that you care for me.
But after what happened.
I am not sure anymore if you can be happy with me.

I did you great harm.
I made you suffer through my selfishness.
You were not happy at all.
Instead you were sorrowful due to my unwarranted self importance.

My selfishness led to me being lazy;
to me being scared; to me lacking motivation.
And it's due to those things and others,
that you have lost faith in me.

I wonder why?
Why am I like this?
Why am I selfish?
Why am I do mind myself more than you?

I am trying my best to look for the answers;
to rise myself anew.
but each time I try,
those same things drag me down.

You tried your best to help me,
to understand and console me.
But all that to no avail,
and it seems your limit has been reached.

I am really sorry for everything.
I don't want to lose you.
Yes, my selfishness and ignorance has come to this,
but I hope that you would still forgive and love me.

I know it will be tough.
but I will do my best to change.
I don't want to be like this any longer.
And I don't want you to get hurt because of me.

I still love you, despite all this.
I do hope you still love me too.
Pray for me, my love, that I may change;
so that I can embrace you with open arms, again.

Belated happy birthday dear blog~

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sun, 20 Nov 2011 13:55:00 +0000

6 more years!

Happy birthday. but I'll post something very emotional in a bit.

....And I miss out on one month worth of blogging.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Tue, 04 Oct 2011 18:42:00 +0000

Not like it matters though, I was too busy finding a job.

Well, back to more serious things, I'm thinking of 3 things about this blog:

1. Go on an indefinite hiatus
2. Keep blogging and post about stuff like politics/games/other bs
3. Move to a private hosting site and establish a wordpress blog + bliki there.

The 3rd option requires money for monthly server bills, and right now I'm still unemployed lol. So probably I'll think of using either the first or the second option.

Also, blogger has a new posting interface! Lol. I kinda like this better than the old interface though. :D

Well, that's all for now. next update? lol I dunno, maybe when I feel like it :)))))

There is something wrong with blogger.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Wed, 31 Aug 2011 11:28:00 +0000

Lol I dunno. Apparently though I can't really post stuff in blogger correctly lately.

Looks like I might be migrating to wordpress if this keeps up :o

Google plus.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sat, 23 Jul 2011 08:36:00 +0000

Derp. here's my google plus account: http://gplus.to/ElysiaSakura

Belated Birthday, Independence Day and some other ramblings

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Mon, 13 Jun 2011 08:12:00 +0000

So yeah, last Thursday was my birthday, and Friday was the celebration. Then again I ended up having indigestion and a bad case of diarrhea for the next few days until today. Really sucks, especially since I ate a whole lot, and my body was going haywire all over because of it. D:

Regardless though it was a fun day and everyone enjoyed it. Especially my girlfriend, who gave me a copy of Noli Me Tangere as a present. I'm thankful for her and for the gift she gave me. It was really touching since I really wanna have a copy of Noli that is not a textbook. Thanks again, sweetums~ *snuggles*

Also, yesterday was independence day. Too bad I wasn't able to get out due to my diarrhea. Sucks. :( But the important thing here is that, the Philippines is like, 113 years old now. And I just hope that through the celebrations held yesterday, the Filipinos will be more inspired to become heroes in their own right and be able to keep the freedom and unity our forefathers fought for and was able to claim over a century ago, as well as help each out to make this country more beautiful and prosperous.

All that aside, right now all I need to ramble about is my sedentary life. You see, like I said in my previous blogpost, I'm still jobless and I'm just stuck here with nothing to do but play games, watch anime and be a basement dwelling weeaboo. Which actually sucks in the long run. Probably, well according to the hypothesis me and my gf had, my indigestion and current health problems can be attributed to me being in a sedentary/NEET state for a long while, and apparently my body doesn't like it. Well, I can't help it if there aren't any jobs available that are suited for me right now. And no I aint going to no call center, fuck that.

/sigh. At this rate I might end up rotting in my house in the end. But I don't wanna be a bloody burden to my family, especially since my dad now has an unstable job nao. Might as well keep on looking for job. Maybe this is just God's way of telling me, it's not yet your time, it will come soon enough. I dunno. But meh, I ain't giving up just yet.

That's all. no birthday pic for nao since I'm on a rush while writing this. Hope you guys have a great week. I'll try to update this as frequently as I can like before, and probably change the layout as well~ See ya!

ZOMG STILL JOBLESS

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sat, 28 May 2011 08:46:00 +0000

So yah, I am graduating this June, but I still don't have a Job.

I dunno, I check out different job-related websites and the classifieds, however it's f. hard to actually look for a job. D: Heh, looks like I'm part of the statistic that 3.5 million Filipinos don't have a job.

But meh. I'll still do my best to find one. I need to help my parents when it comes to expenses, and I want to hold my own share of cash too lol.

So yah. /rant.

Long time no post

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:01:00 +0000

Guess I owe you guys some words.

Haven't been updating the blog recently due to thesis and because I couldn't get myself to fix this.

I was supposed to make a new layout for this blog a few months back but I guess it didn't materialize.

Good news though is that me and my thesismates are done with thesis, and 3 of us are gonna graduate this June. Me though, I have to look for a stable job now. I don't want to stay stagnant all day long fffffff.

But meh, at least I'm done with university for now. I guess I have enough time to actually finish all the anime I've started, etc.

I won't make any promises like last time, but I'll try to update the layout and the site *if I can get myself to do so*. Until then, see you guys around~

For you.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sun, 27 Mar 2011 04:12:00 +0000

I never really understood why there is a need for you to brood over your mistakes for an extended period of time. We are human anyway, we certainly have flaws and we all make mistakes at some point in our lives. You don't really need to feel down for too long because of your flaws and mistakes. Besides, you see me doing all sorts of mistakes and I don't feel down for an extended period of time. I suggest you do the same.

But the thing is... To say that I should break up with you because of your flaws? That's f. stupid. Why would I even want to do that? I'm more than willing to help fix those flaws of yours since you are helping me fix mine, and because I care so much for you. I willing to help you because I love you. Despite all your flaws and all the mistakes you have done, still that wouldn't mean that I will no longer love you anymore because of that, no. I will still love you because you are you. I will always love you. Always.

I love you. Despite all the trouble, all the mistakes, all the bad stuff and the physical distance between us, I won't let those hinder me from loving you more and more and more. That is how much I love you.

So uh yeah... another thing.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 11:18:00 +0000

I won't make a tumblr account. because :effort:

Nor am I gonna export this blog and transfer it to a wordpress blog. unless it's hosted on my own server.

that is all.

The only things I pray for right now...

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 09:57:00 +0000

1. That my thesismates can finally finish their part of thesis and submit the document on time so that we can defend our thesis.
2. That the problems that my girlfriend is having right now will be resolved soon.
3. That what everyone in Japan is safe and that the tsunami that might come in my country right now will not be as destructive as a lot of people are saying.
4. Most Importantly, that everything will be alright.

I won't lose hope. I know there is a way. I will do my best, and pray that God will do his part as well.

Doubt... and Reflection.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Wed, 09 Mar 2011 12:10:00 +0000

I just came back from a long time of reflection. But before I get to those that I thought about during that time, right now there is some sort of cloud of doubt regarding our thesis.

With less than two weeks left and with so much to do, I've realized that our group has been doing this at a really slow pace. As much as I want my groupmates to work faster and focus more on thesis, I don't want them to burn out because of that. But at the same time it has to be done so that by the time defense comes, we can really defend our thesis. What a dilemma lol.

Right now I thought of several solutions, such as doing quick testing ASAP and to give some story work to some friends. But although this will speed up the process of the writing of documentation, I still doubt that we can still finish everything by next next week. But I hope that this will suffice in at least appeasing our thesis adviser. Looks like it's now time for me to find means and ways of fixing this mess. I hope and pray that me and my thesismates can get through this mess.

Anyway... Back to my points of reflection, it actually included some things regarding thesis. However, what I really wanna reflect right now is something more... spiritual. As in, I've been asking these questions all this time since earlier:

- Have I been a "good person"?

- Am I really following God's will?

- Am I acting like a man of faith and not like a hypocrite?

- Am I too bashful and full of pride (And has removed his policy of humility)?

- Have I forgotten to become generous to others?

- Do I have respect for everyone around me?

Yeah. These things are and others are in my thoughts, though I will reflect later about these and other concerns as well. Honestly, I want to have a clearer mind before I can tackle the other problems that plague me right now, and right now would be a good time to do so.

Yeah. That's all, for now. Might be writing an even longer posted in the coming days~

A Belated Valentines Post

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Fri, 25 Feb 2011 14:47:00 +0000

Love, Love and moar Love. Spread the love, but not the virus~ :))

I love my girlfriend soooooooooooooo much. That is all.

Belated Happy Valentines day every~nyan.

Will update the blog and prolly post some huge chunks of text in the following days~ :3

Moar place holder posts

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sat, 29 Jan 2011 09:17:00 +0000

Yeah, nothing to blog again.

Was supposed to post a closure to some of the issues that came to me in the past couple of weeks/months but meh. too lazy.

Prolly gonna do it next month before valentines~

In the mean time, better watch out for Egypt. I heard they're rioting about oppression. I guess we gotta support them because at least the protesters are doing the right thing.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Nyaa

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 06:37:00 +0000

Well, this is both a Christmas and a New Year post.

So many things happened during this past year, and I'm really grateful for the many blessings and trials that came into my life, especially when my girlfriend entered into my life.

and now, in celebration, Nozomi from Mayoi Neko Overrun:

Hope you guys will have a Happy New Year! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Nyaa to all~

Something to think about.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Wed, 01 Dec 2010 05:03:00 +0000

You know this morning, when I told you that I couldn't come today, apparently though you took it in a negative light, and even though after that outburst you ended up telling me it's alright or you understand, I sometimes wonder if you really do think that way, or you're like Sophie who keeps some sort of grudge whenever someone does something wrong to you.

I dunno. It made me actually think if I'm actually able to keep up with this. You know me, I have a short fuse, though I complement it with a horde of patience. And I also think that your sudden outbursts can be due to either stress or lack of sleep, though in this case it's apparent that the latter holds true. But meh. Right now, I just feel... distant towards you right now. It's been a while since I felt this distance and I now I'm having doubts if I really know you or you're just hiding a lot of stuff from me.

*shrugs* I'll just shrug it off for now, knowing this is just something isolated. But always remember that I am very transparent, and I'll always tell what I'm planning to do beforehand. To me, I think you should do the same as well. I still love you though, and I still want this to last.

...and yeah, I'm just posting this here, in my blog since I'm abstaining from plurk for nao.

God has a funny way of doing things.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Wed, 24 Nov 2010 09:53:00 +0000

I'll cut to the chase. Apparently, we won't be able to defend this term. We have invested too much time in our system that we ended up not being able to do much about our document. *Sighs*. Looks like we'll end up taking another term in the school then.

But on a lighter note, apparently instead of me feeing sad, I actually felt more... relieved. Could it be because our adviser saved us from the humiliation of defense? Would it be because we were actually given another shot at actually completing our thesis? Is it because it is God indirectly telling me that it's not yet time for me to leave th university for now?

I could think of many reasons why I feel that way. Actually I find it quite weird for me to feel like that. Maybe that's because I tend to end up accepting the mistakes that I (and as well as my thesismates) have done and have actually learned a thing or two from them. Or maybe it's because it's pointless arguing about whose fault is it that the entire group failed for the second time.

Heh. So many questions, 'ne? But meh, it made me think that God does have a funny way of doing things. Apparently though, he does things in accordance to what you have done to deserve it. The consequence is determined by the amount of effort done on one task, apparently. In our case, we did a lot, but it seems it wasn't enough, therefore God just gave us our "just reward", but at the same time indirectly, he tells us, not to lose hope, and keep trying to succeed. We just need to do more effort.

Well, quoting Alanis Morissette in her song "Ironic":

"Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face"

I guess she is right anyway. Life and God have funny ways of doing things. No point in crying over spilled milk if it happened anyway. I guess the only thing I can do right now is just move on, face the consequences and work harder in order to really set things straight and, finally, be able to make things right.

Just hope and pray for us. Pray that we may be able to find the strength and the determination to finish what we have started and do what is needed to do. I hope and pray that by the end of next term, we'll finally be able to graduate.

Love.

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Wed, 24 Nov 2010 09:34:00 +0000

Been almost a month since the last blog post. Sorry if I haven't updated. A lot of things have happened in the past few weeks, but they all have a common theme: Love.

Yeah. I already got a girlfriend. It was not really that sudden though. I actually liked her. It all started when we decided to hang out with each other to watch a few movies. Though yeah, admittedly my money got burned because of that but meh, being with her was worth it. Afterwards it's all... sudden. Eventually we fell in love and in the end, we became a couple.

It's really hard to describe the actually process, but I'm glad that she became my girlfriend. Despite the challenges, like her job schedules and my academic work among other things, still we try to find time to really be with one another and really get to know more about each other. We both really make this relationship as fruitful as possible, and it is really likely that it will be.

Yeah, She loves me, I love her even more. I don't really care about what other people think about this. I don't really mind what would be the consequences. I love her. She loves me. To me that is the most important thing right now. I don't need anything else. All I need is her love and God... and a dancing banana.

We've been through a lot even though our relationship is just nearly 2 months old. However, I'm quite sure that our bonds of love will transcend all trials and difficulties, and will stand the tests of time and distance. Hopefully by the grace of God and through the things we do, we may be able to really make this relationship a meaningful and fruitful one.

To my girlfriend, I love you. *hugs and kisses*

Happy Birthday Blog!

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Fri, 05 Nov 2010 13:52:00 +0000

5 more years!

Half a decade has past and this blog is all but dead. Meh. Hopefully in the next few days/weeks, I'll make it alive again~

Anyway, cheers! Happy Birthday dear blog~

OH SHI- LACK OF UPDATES LOLOLOLOLOL

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sat, 02 Oct 2010 13:27:00 +0000

LOL Haven't made progress with that blog layout LOL.

I have uploaded it already but I became lazy and too busy with recettear to even bother LOL.

Anyway, I'll be posting something in the next few days. Probably a review of recettear and some other blogging stuff.

Until then, everyone~

Synthesis: Why did I post those last 3 entries?

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sun, 05 Sep 2010 13:52:00 +0000

Now... you guys may wonder, why the heck is this guy dedicating 3 blog posts to post like some angsty kid who just wants to let out all his rage regarding certain issues/people/himself?

Well, as stated in the titles of the series, they're just there to ease my mind, especially on the first 2 posts.. As in, those things have been plaguing me for like quite some time now. Some I've already forgotten, but others just keep on persisting. I don't want trash like that to clog up what's in my brain right now, heck no. I just want my mind to be free from unnecessary thoughts. One way to do it is by what I just did: blog about it. Write down all those things plaguing my mind and let them go in the process, just placing them there. At least it made my mind and subsequently my heart at ease.

Another reason is because I don't want my voice to be unheard, specifically on the second post. Freedom of speech so to speak. I don't want my mouth to be censored by duct tape. Yes, I may be blunt and straight to the point but I need to express myself. I don't want my opinions to be locked up inside a cage in my mind for long, I need to express it. And a good way to express those is through this blog.

In closing, the aforementioned reasons are my reasons why I posted those entries. It's up to you guys if you would accept my reasons, but in all honesty, that's the truth. I just don't want stuff to be stuck in my brain for long. and it's getting tiresome to constantly think of those kinds of things.

Well that wraps up this series of blog rants. I'll be updating the blog layout soon, it's been like months since I last updated it. durr~.

Random Ramblings just to give me peace of mind: PART 3

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sun, 05 Sep 2010 08:43:00 +0000

Now for this last part, this is more focused on Self-Criticism. Yep. I'll be flaming myself. You might think that this is weird, but it is important for yourself to know what are your own weaknesses and flaws and acknowledge them, as well as thinking of what to do to about those things.

It's not really a matter of pride, but rather it's an issue of accepting yourself and doing something about your problems. I'll be as honest and blunt as possible here. It's my own problems anyway, so I gotta face them like a man. No point in running away since this is my life anyway, so it's inevitable. It can't be helped.

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Yeah, I'm overweight. by around 12lbs. And yeah, my beer belly is starting to bulge again. I needs more exercise. >_>

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I have a lot of bad habits and mannerisms. Although some have been resolved but there are some that are just too... persistent. It's personally getting on my nerves, but then again force of habit, etc.

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Am I pushing myself too hard when it comes my ideas? Everytime I present those ideas of mine, I tend to insist on it as if it was the correct idea and that everyone else's ideas are wrong. I know that there are no right and wrong ideas, but it seems that due to my persistence and my superiority complex, it's as if I keep on saying to everyone that everything I say is right and their ideas are wrong, which in my view is f. stupid.

I facepalm so hard because of this flaw of mine.

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And probably one my biggest obstacles is my laziness. Yes. I suffer from a strong case of sloth. I'm too lazy and too unmotivated to do anything, although right now I have SOME motivation in the form of dreams and challenges, but that is not enough to make me less lazier than now.

and... vid effing related. LOL.

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Paranoia.... I easily get paranoid, especially if people are giving me the cold shoulder. To the point that I might end up punching the person giving me that cold shoulder.

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I need to learn to communicate more effectively with other people. Most of the time I'm just silent, but when it comes to online forums and blogs, I'm as noisy as heck. I need to transfer that noisiness IRL, not just limit it to the internet. o_O

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Oh and one more thing, I keep on saying "later, later". Why delay when I can just do it immediately? That's probably the reason why I can't really resolve most of these weaknesses and flaws that I have. I keep on delaying it for whatever reason. What.

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All for now. I'm pretty sure there are more but, for now this will do. probably I'll edit this post if ever. It may be a few, but these are the weaknesses and flaws that I have. I admit that I do/have all of these and I'm really a flawed person after all. Then again, who isn't. I just hope and pray that Imay have the strength, inspiration and determination to resolve all these things...

Final post after this: Synthesis: Why did I post all these things?

Random Ramblings just to give me peace of mind: PART 2

noreply@blogger.com (June Benedict Parreno) — Sun, 05 Sep 2010 06:12:00 +0000

Now, if the previous post dealt with whatever bullshit I noticed to my friends or whatever crap my friends are throwing out towards me, this one is more on certain things that some people, not limited to my friends want me to do, as well as some opinions on some current issues in this country that are somewhat affecting me and my work at this very moment. Expect things to be shorter though.

Once again, feel free to comment if you have some clarifications/violent reactions.

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Clubbing? No thanks. I don't really mingle much with the elite and the privileged. I'd rather party with the poor and the simple people. The proletariat, so to speak. Besides, I'm not really into clubbing, I'm more into street and rave parties. At least I get to meet all sorts of people there and what not. Besides, if you're gonna say that "club for the sake of socializing!", still no thanks. There are other places to socialize. Bars, concerts, heck even in the arcade I can socialize.

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Smoking? I don't want to get lung cancer this early in my life. So no thanks. And no, as much as possible I must avoid second or third hand smoke. I don't want my lungs to deteriorate faster.

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One reason why I don't always stick in the same places all the time is because I want variety in life. That's why I don't stay stuck at the house, or at school, or at the internet cafe. I go to the arcade, I go malls, in short, I try to find time to go to place that I always wanted to go, provided I have enough money of course LOL. As long as I get to experience what it's like to go places through public transportation, I'm more or less satisfied~

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The recent hostage situation? Both the Police and the Media are at fault.

The Police are at fault for not able to handle the situation as carefully and as strictly as possible. Heck, looking at the video, the police are doing very stupid things during the rescue event. Still lol'd at the Sledgehammer going into the bus and the policeman placed his hand into the bus to retrieve it. That was funny yet stupid. Heck. This only proves the incompetency of our Philippine National Police.

The media are at fault here as well. They showed a full Blow-by-Blow coverage of the event, without knowing that the hostage taker may be watching the entire fiasco on the TV inside the bus. The media was also "smart" enough to show the current locations of the police and their actions. Awesome, right? And the best part is, the media claims that they are "restraining" themselves, when in fact as seen from the events, they did not. What the heck.

And now, people are now throwing rocks at each other, blaming each other for this mess. And looks like the Filipinos might have to face the angry community in Hong Kong because of this. If the government can't do something about this soon, we might end up facing China in a losing war, more or less.

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Communism? No Thanks. It doesn't mean everything is equal means it's fair. Also, individualism and human rights. That's something I do not see in communist nations.

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Oh yeah btw, it doesn't mean a guy liks anime merchandise and sometimes bring them along with him means a person is an otaku. Know him more before you judge. Actually, stereotyping a person is f. stupid and useless. Every person in unique in one way or another. Please understand.

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Meh. Too lazy to add any more, but I guess that covers it. I'll add some more should those things pop up again.

Next Post: Part 3: Self Criticism.