LouFederer

The Official Site for The Borderline / Featured Gigs / Butch Walker Tickets

2011-06-17T16:31:00.000+01:00

The Official Site for The Borderline / Featured Gigs / Butch Walker Tickets

I Would I Were a Nightingale

2011-06-10T10:34:00.001+01:00

I Would I Were a Nightingale

I would I were a nightingale so high among the trees,
To bend with every chorus line and dance upon the breeze.
To lark about with field-mice on idle summer days,
And bask beneath the setting sun’s delightful golden rays.
To swoop and soar ad libitum with wind beneath my wings,
To revel in the wonderment that Mother Nature brings.
Maintaining anonymity upon my garden seat:
So rarely seen but daily heard; unendingly discreet.
But O! Perhaps there’s more to my desire than meets the eye:
My wish for boundless roaming in a never-ending sky;
My dream for total weightlessness and unencumbered flight,
To sleep amid the canopy for every day and night.
I would I were a nightingale if only for a day,
To look down on this barren world and quickly fly away.

By L.R. Chapman 2011

Writer's Block

2011-06-09T21:02:00.002+01:00

I've recently had trouble with a major writer's block, hence my silence and the arguable lack of quality in the poem I wrote during this time. I feel I am getting my creativity back now (see poem 'Ubi Sunt').

The Writer's Block

When faced with pen and paper

I seem to feel this way:

My head and heart are overwhelmed

With what I wish to say.

The words are streaming in my mind,

Yet no sense do they make:

My strive towards translucency

For all that is opaque.

I lack not inspiration,

Nor willing for the task,

But when I come to execute

It seems too great an ask.

I panic in my impotence,

I curse my feebleness;

And wonder how, when in my youth,

I wrote with such finesse.

I look back on these very lines

And wonder where it went:

My once so-pleasing aptitude

Which now seems all-but spent.

I simply hope that soon enough

My talent will return:

No longer will I struggle so,

No need for such concern!

I'll set my thoughts to verse again

With elegance and flair:

No more dismal half-attempts,

No reasons for despair.

In time I shall reclaim my gift,

Which currently I lack,

So when I write with style again,

You'll know I've got it back.

New Poem: Ubi Sunt

2011-06-09T20:48:00.003+01:00

Ubi Sunt

I miss the things I never had,

And dream in days gone by;

I long for summer nights beneath

An ever-planeless sky.

I want for honest craftsmanship

And knowledge bought for free:

I strive to resurrect such

Unpretentious artistry.

I hunger on the final page

Of every ancient script,

And deconstruct until I breach

Its undefilèd crypt.

I revel in the consciousness

Of such philosophy,

And feel myself transported by

The Hand of History.

But O! The hand becomes a fist,

And from my dream I waken:

Aware again of time and place

And how my soul’s forsaken.

My soul belongs to yesteryear

With Dryden, Keats and Pope:

To live as long, in memory,

Is my sincerest hope.

By L.R. Chapman 2011

This is a first draft. I am in the process of writing an anthology.

Essential Revision and Study Advice

2011-01-18T20:23:00.000Z

Notes from video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W30P0yuQMgM
In different subjects:

English - for closed-text exams, learn short, pithy quotations that epitomise the common themes in the novel/poem.
Reread novels until you can volubly discuss the text in detail with another person. Do practice papers, and look out for trends year on year (questions might be character-based one year, thematic the next). Remember the usual formula: point, evidence, explanation. Learn literary terms. Nobody can really teach you 'style' - it should come naturally if you're good at it.

Psychology (and humanities): mostly memorising. Write eloquently in your exam. Knowing case-studies and fundamental concepts will make your answers water-tight. Never waffle; keep it succinct. I got a 7 and wrote far fewer pages than those I asked, who got much lower grades. It's all about quality (that goes for every subject).

Sciences: practice equations, learn formulae, go through your revision guide/textbook, be discriminating in what you highlight, and if you don't understand something WRITE IT DOWN. Go over things until they stick. You can also close your textbook/revision guide, get a blank piece of paper, and try to recall all the information on a topic or key concept in your subject. Trying to recall information without having the handrail of your revision guide there will make the information stick because you are having to actively process it the info. Practice with friends - get somebody to 'teach' you a section, and then do the same for them. Having to explain things to somebody on your own words will cement the knowledge in your head and stop you relying on textbook definitions.

Maths: practice is the key.

French: go through verb tables, and do as many grammar excises as possible. Get an advanced vocabulary/phrase book (meant for essay writing) and try committing as much to memory as possible. If you write a journal, try writing it in the language you study. Also, try having French-only conversations with friends every now and then. Also, ask your French teacher is he/she will go over certain things for you. If you have any doubts, just ASK. Some teachers presume that you know all the rules about a language, and if you don't, you risk losing marks very easily through avoidable grammar mistakes. Reading comprehension exercises are very helpful too, although exceedingly dull.

Extra amazing advice: go into your iTunes, click on iTunes store (d/w it's all free stuff) and type in whatever you want, like the name of a novel, a poem - and you will invariably find many audio files in the Itunes U (the university section). I found many for different novels and poems, and really useful ones for Philosophy and science. It's like having a free lecture from a top university - pretty epic stuff, especially for free. DO IT!!! Also, if you're a philosophy student, you can subscribe to Philosophy Bites podcasts (again, free) which are updated twice monthly and feature some of leading modern philosophers, discussing a different topic in each episode. Amazing, life-changing and very helpful for essays and presentations!

Walkthrough: My Make-Up Routine

2011-01-17T23:29:00.001Z

So, I get many questions regarding my make-up so I thought I would share my everyday routine here.

This takes around 20 minutes.

1.) Moisturise with Elizabeth Arden's Eight Hour Cream Sun Defence for Face SPF 50.

2.) Apply NARS Sheer Glow Foundation (in Deauville) with MAC 189 brush.

3.) Use Bobbi Brown Corrector under eyes (in Porcelain Bisque) to cover dark circles.

4.) Use Bobbi brown Creamy Concealer (in Sand) to go over the Corrector and cover any areas of discolouration on face/neck.

5.) Mix equal amounts of Benefit High Beam and Benefit Moon Beam on your hand; take MAC 130 brush, dip it into the mixed products and stipple onto check bones. Blend using patting motions with middle and ring fingers.

6.) Use MAC Prep + Prime Finishing Powder with MAC 134 brush and dust over entire face and neck.

7.) Use NARS Laguna Bronzer to warm up the perimeter of the face. Use MAC 134 brush again.

8.) Use NARS Orgasm Blush with MAC 129 brush on cheekbones.

9.) Use MAC Harmony Blush using MAC 109 brush to contour the underside of the cheekbone, and underside of jaw line.

10.) Use MAC Brow Pencil in Fling to lightly fill in brows - use light, feathery movements.

11.) Take Urban Decay Primer Potion and cover the entire eye area from lashline to the brow bone. Also take a little on your finger and apply to the lower lash line and water line (this will ensure no eyeliner smudges.)

12.) Take MAC Chromaline in Primary Yellow, and apply with MAC 195 brush on on the eye ONLY up to the crease (where the coloured eyeshadows will be placed.)

13.) Take any flat eyeshadow shading brush and use MAC Twinks e/s to shade the outer third of the eye, up to the crease.

14.) Take a clean flat eyeshadow shading brush and use MAC Expensive Pink e/s to cover the middle third of the eye, blending into the Twinks (we're creating a gradation here!)

15.) Take a smaller eyeshadow brush and use MAC All That Glitters e/s to use on the inner third of the eye, blending into the Expensive Pink eyeshadow.

16.) Now take a clean flat eyeshadow brush and use a backwards-and-forwards movement to blend all the colours in the crease.

17. Take a fluffy eyeshadow brush, MAC 124 or otherwise, and use MAC Brule e/s above crease and onto the browbone.

18.) Use MAC's Powerpoint eye-pencil in Engraved on the lower water line (cover it entirely).

19.) Take Make Up For Ever Eyeshadow in No. 92 (vivid purple) and brush on lower lash line (entirely).

20.) Take MAC's Tempting e/s and brush over the MUFE e/s.

21.) Use L'Oreal Carbon Gloss liquid liner and draw a thin line on the upper lash line.

22.) Curl eyelashes.

23.) Use Lancome Definicils mascara and coat lashes until they are long and thick.

24.) Use Too Faced Lip Injection Extreme on lips (let it settle for about 3 minutes).

25.) Use MAC Tanarama lipstick.

YOU'RE DONE!

2010-11-13T22:38:00.002Z

Clearing the Leaves

2010-11-13T21:56:00.002Z

Clearing the leaves so children can play,

Filling the bin bags with Autumn's decay,

Crab apples falling

And trees growing bare:

A day in the life of a lonely au pair.

One minute poetry series.

LRC

The Modern World

2010-11-07T23:33:00.003Z

The modern world’s a hostile place for artists such as me,

Who want to make a living from progressive poetry,

They tell me, "no one reads it,"

They say, "it’s such a bore,"

"You might as well just give it up and find work as a whore."

LRC

1 minute poetry series.

TAG: When I'm At My Best

2010-10-22T11:08:00.001+01:00

Do this tag as well!

I wear (clothes): leopard print cardigan with navy blue velvet dress, wool tights and tan leather cowboy boots

I wear (perfume): Shalimar by Guerlain

I wear (make-up): MAC eyeshadows, Urban Decay eyeliner, Lancome mascara, Estée Lauder foundation, NARS blusher, MAC lipstick, Too Faced lipgloss, MAC bronzer, Bobbi Brown concealer (helps if I am faked-tanned too!)

I style my hair: in a ponytail with lots of volume in my layers (plenty of hairspray)

I listen to: The Living End (favourite albums 'Roll On' and 'The Living End' and 'White Noise'… oh how about all of them)

I create: lists of things I want to buy, or things I want to read

I think about: how to make the most of myself and my future prospects

I talk to: Sheila L, Ellie H, Olivia C, Mummy, Joey C

I spend time with: my cats

I eat: a varied and plentiful amount

I drink: diet Red Bull or Tropicana Sanguinello

I read: some Philip Larkin or Evelyn Waugh

I watch: University Challenge

I sleep: 9 hours a night

I play: my Gibson Les Paul Custom really loudly, while nobody is at home

To really treat myself: have a massage, facial, or listen to Philosophy Bites

Life in Paris - A Contradiction of Terms?

2010-10-13T20:50:00.002+01:00

When you think of living in Paris, it is nigh on unavoidable to lose yourself in fantasies of passionate garlic-breathed romances, idle shopping jaunts with continental Monopoly-money, and suckling on a centuries-old teat that oozes Art and Philosophy. What really transpires, however, is a cultural cesspit where these teenage reveries come to die, and the only lingering vapour is that of an ageing sewage system. No really, it smells terrible.

You may think I’m giving it a hard time already, but not without due reason. I have been living in France now for five weeks solid: I am a vegetarian who can now only find edible protein in a Babybel; the pound is so poor against the euro that I can hardly conceive of going shopping without my mind contorting with guilt; as an au pair I earn a third-worldly 3€ per hour, and even when I want to purport culture, the queue for the Louvre is a miserable mile long.

I am of the opinion that some places should just be kept as holiday destinations, and Paris is no exception. On your inaugural visit, as I can testify, there is a grand sense of experiencing the magic you had only previously heard about. The initial (and brittle) glamour of walking into a postcard scene is hugely impressive: you might stay for a week, come back having only scratched the surface of the place, upload your predictable photos onto Facebook, and tell everybody how your life will never be the same again. I should have known better. When you’ve done Notre Dame, dragged your heavy legs around the many-aisles of the Louvre, seen the Eiffel Tower by day (and night – from a river cruise – while sipping Beaujolais – whilst listening to an accordion-player), the city suddenly appears for what it really is. Maybe it would be harsh to say Paris is all style and no substance, but even as an Art History aficionado, my admiration for the place has thinned inoperably. What actually remains after Printemps has mugged you for all you are worth, and you’ve exhausted your cultural capacity with all the Art in the world? A sense of curiosity and the question: why all the hype?

I suppose it’s just the thing to do, really. If you haven’t ‘done’ Paris, you’re considered some kind of cultural deviant, although I’m now starting to think you can even ‘overdo’ a city like this. Arguably, if I weren’t doing such a life-denying job over here, I’d be a little more light-hearted about the affair. However, after five days of working with the brattiest parents (and children) in Europe, the mere conception of being packed like a sardine onto the Metro and having to waddle down every boulevard without room to swing your elbows, dashes any remote crumb of glamour from the set-up. Just like any city that has become prey to mega-tourism, Paris seems to have lost its heart – and mine.

But don’t get me wrong, Paris isn’t all shit - although the smell might lead you to that conclusion. The Architecture is truly among the greatest in France, and the trains often run on time. But, quite frankly, that’s as far as my praise will/can stretch. Even French yoghurt is appalling – who knew incisors were needed for its consumption? I feel woefully disillusioned, as though ensnared by a fair fool whose charms all but vanished upon critical inspection. Unfortunately, my work contract lasts until July, so I need to fall in love with this city or I am going to have a dismal nine months ahead of me. Or perhaps my complimentary Bupa cover will provide some free tranquillisers? Or a lobotomy? Ok, sorted.

LRC 2010

MAC and NARS Haul

2010-09-01T12:40:00.006+01:00

Starting with MAC. I went to my local CCO and found some really sweet products: Beauty Powder Blush in Enough Said (from Red She Said collection), Starflash Collection's Dreammaker and Unbasic White Eyeshadows, and Make-Up Art Cosmetic collection's Crest The Wave eyeshadow.

Unbasic White: a creamy, super-iridescent off-white. The perfect highlight colour.

Crest The Wave: a soft gold-yellow colour - another brilliant highlight colour.

Dreammaker: a gorgeous goldy-yellow that is ideal for all over the lid.

Enough Said Beauty Powder Blush: a sheeny, orange-gold blush/bronzer - the more summery alternative to Trace Gold blush, perhaps?

The NARS Haul (HQHair.com)

I have been longing for these blushes for AGES: Taj Mahal and Desire.

Taj Mahal is a rich, iridescent orange - it is probably my new favourite now.
Desire is a matte, deep hot pink - a bit like MAC's Dollymix.

This is one of my best hauls to date - who could ask for better products?

Lou X

Using The Naked Palette!

2010-08-28T15:35:00.003+01:00

Today I created my first look with the Naked Palette by Urban Decay: a soft, smokey brown and black look. I can do better, but it's a start!

21st Birthday Wishlist

2010-08-28T12:06:00.009+01:00

I am going to be 21 on 9th October 2010 - 'the big one' as it is known, although the reason for that still mystifies me. I have a fairly comely budget to play with, but am absolutely stuck for ideas about what I want. Let's look at the possibilities!

I have had my eye on a Toy Watch for a few years now, but I had a perfectly-functional Baby-G until a few weeks ago when it broke. I am now watch-less, which is dangerous when you love to be organised. I thought I would get a pure white one, but the coloured-face watches are fairly new to the collection and I think they look really cute. This one is my favourite (http://www.toywatchwatches.co.uk/light-blue-dial-time-only-fluo-mood-toywatch-fl01whlb.html). However, maybe I should just go for the all-white one owing to its timelessness - I might get fed up with fluorescent blue... Your thoughts on the matter?!

This bag by Aspinal of London (above) is another utter babe that I have been eyeing up for far too long (http://www.aspinaloflondon.com/eshop-catalogue/ladies-collection/handbags-and-clutch-bags/portobello-saddle-bag/4439-portobello-saddle-bag-in-smooth-tan-and-stone-suede). The red-brick leather and gold clasp are absolutely edible - and might go very nicely with my Marc Jacobs wallet (below.)

I was also thinking about getting some statement clothing pieces: a vintage velvet blazer, some (more) vintage cowboy boots.

I saw this green velvet blazer on eBay about a week ago, but it was snapped up before I even had a chance. It's a deep, emerald green with gold buttons, vintage 1979 - sold for £35. Let's hope another one comes up just like it!

These cowboy boots from R-Sole are really the thing I'm looking for. They are close to £300 though - my vintage 1970 Justin cowboy boots were only £40 on eBay!

My current cowboy boots:

I love them! Maybe I will have another look on eBay for my second pair?

That is all I can think of for now. I will post again when I feel inspired!

Lou X

Urban Decay Naked Palette

2010-08-28T11:37:00.003+01:00

So here is the long-awaited Naked Palette from Urban Decay. Having seen countless make-up gurus from the US reviewing this, I knew it would fly off the shelves of British department stores within hours of being released. I managed to get one of the last ones at House of Fraser, after they had sold out online, and I am absolutely delighted with it.

The colours are completely 'me': all neutral, all in brownish tones, all perfect to complement my blue eyes. The texture of these shadows is second to none: compared with MAC, the metallic shades are similar (if not better) than Veluxe Pearls, and the matte shades are like creamier Satin finishes.

My favourite colours are Sidecar (a taupe-mid-brown), Half-Baked (rich, light gold), Smog (gold-flecked brown, v. similar to MAC's Tempting) and Sin (rich light pink, v. si

milar to MAC's All That Glitters or Naked Lunch.)The mini primer potion is adorable too! However, I already have two full-size Potions to get through - I might gift this to somebody?

Here is the palette in all its glory. The double-ended liner is quite epic too. I was going to purchase the 24/7 liner in Zero, but it was sold out (quel surprise) - so the fact it was included in this palette completely sold me, that is if I had had any reservations. For £27 this palette is a show-stopper: it's affordable, boasts a comprehensive neutral selection, and the quality and pay-off of the shades is without fault. It's a 10/10 from me - get yours while/if you still can!

Lou X

Life is Changing

2010-08-05T22:19:00.002+01:00

So, life is going to be changing very drastically in the next month. On September 4th I will be moving to Paris for 9 months, working as an au pair for a Czech family who have also recently relocated to the city. I will be based in Versailles, which is apparently very luxurious - I must say, it's very exciting.

But on the flipside, I feel anxious. I don't know quite what life will be like in Paris, I don't know the family any better than from 30 emails. They seem really sweet, however, so I am not too concerned (despite having some terrible nightmares where the family were abusive and bullying...!) I have been watching "Supernanny", a programme about families with unruly children, just to get some tips on child management, should these children be of the misbehaving bent... As I said before, I get really good vibes from this family, and I feel quite confident that the children are polite, respectful and thus will prove a joy to take care of!

I am practising now the recipes you guys have posted to my YouTube account. This is something that has been worrying me a bit, since my Mother seems to think I am going to be the house chef (not that she would know.) I just want to be able to feed them healthy, satiating meals that are really tasty. My own diet and eating habits aren't those I'd like to instil in other people, since most people, and indeed my family, call my eating habits 'odd'. I tend to avoid eating 3 square meals a day, as we are encouraged to; instead, I eat 2 large-ish meals, and make up the rest of my calories in healthy (and some unhealthy) snacks. This seems to work as a means of weight maintenance, but I am also aware that these habits will have to change when I move to Paris, so as to calibrate my eating with the family's.

On other matters, I have been a little naughty with fitness recently, and not in an 'over-doing it' kind of way. I did not run for a stretch of three weeks, and hell did I feel it upon taking a run two days ago. My lungs really struggled, and my body the next day was feeling warped and bungled. I attempted running today but some five minutes in, I had the most intolerable stitch which meant I had to stop and come home. I believe this is because I did not leave a large enough gap between eating and exercise - my brother, a fervent runner, says you should ideally leave three hours between these respective activities. I think I will take this advice in the future if I don't want to be disappointed.

Other aspects of my life are seeming quite mundane at the moment, since this is basically a lacuna in which I have free time and free will to do as I please. I must admit, I am sucker for a routine, and being in this 'interloping' phase really does not become me. I go to bed horrendously late, take breakfast when most would have lunch, find my hunger coming on at unproductive hours of the night, flit around online between equally tedious websites searching for some feeling of belonging... Life has just become quite watery, with no central focus, and nothing giving me any sense of true purpose.

I hope everything in my short-term future goes well though. I am applying for University this year, for entry in October 2011, which is incredible exciting. Finally I feel I can pursue the level of study that I've always craved. I am getting back into reading properly, after many years of prescriptive reader and few opportunities for pleasure reading (although, don't get me wrong, many books I have studied for school and college were among the best of my life so far.) I am feeling very optimistic for my long-term future, it's just my short-term future (i.e. au pairing) that is making me feel uneasy. Arguably, this is owing to the 'great unknown' of what lies out there in France - will I feel comfortable there, will I be happy, will I click with the children? I really really hope so. We shall see, and I will keep everybody informed as to my progress over there.

Peace out.

More Fashion Fixing!

2010-06-29T12:22:00.004+01:00

Honey-topped Vampy

Horse & Hound

Sexy, funky, edgy

Ultimate pool-side glamour

Regatta couture

Shopping in London

A day at College

FASHION

2010-06-27T22:47:00.001+01:00

GUYS! I've just discovered cyber-fashion-heaven. Honestly. Have a look at this site if you're into design, art, fashion - whatever really! One of my 'sets' is below. Enjoy people of the world!

Munich

2010-06-27T16:17:00.004+01:00

Hey all! Well, I'm back from Germany now and I'll be making a post-holiday video very soon... I have a LOT to tell you all... Some good, some bad, some scary! Ciao for now babes of the world x

Wearing too much on a shite-hot day!

Me with mi madre

Ludvig's Theatre

A pleasant series of waves

Posing in the elevator

Their bakeries take da biscuit (pardon my punning.)

Rathaus (seriously sexy.)

MAC Ruby Woo making an appearance!

Going - but not forgotten!

2010-06-22T22:56:00.003+01:00

Hey guys! I'll be in Munich from tomorrow (Wednesday), until Monday (28th June) - so don't despair or think I've disappeared for good! I hope you're all wonderful in spirits and shape. I'm currently so anxious about my IB results' day that I can hardly sleep. Still, I can only hope my worries are unfounded. Seul l'avenir nous le dire! Adieu pour maintenant. Ciao! xxx

My Kittens - Just a Few Pics!

2010-06-16T00:36:00.002+01:00

Cedric when he was tiiiiiny!

Cedric tonight!

Cedric with Simon - action shot!

When Cedric were mini-sized awww haha

MANKY MAKE-UP BRUSHES!

2010-06-16T00:31:00.003+01:00

ERGH, these brushes make me SICK. I cannot believe I was using these crusty, matted, bodged old buggers for so many years... What was I thinking? Thank God I got my new Sigma brushes today, it's actually like a make-up bag epiphany (I heard it whisper a thank you.) From now on, my make-up will look immaculate - no more large patches of bronzer, or funkily-blended eyeshadow. From now on it's slick, stylish, and Sigma. Well, with the help of MAC products too. ;)

Testing My Camera at Midnight

2010-06-15T00:34:00.003+01:00

My brother's Arsenal FC cologne - I actually LOVE it on me... it's sexy to wear mens' cologne ;)

Classic Vera Wang :)

MJ Daisy, Lanvin Rumeur, JLo Glow

My prized and beloved Marc Jacobs wallet

A peek inside my messy handbag!

Products I am LOVING Right Now!

2010-06-14T12:10:00.005+01:00

List of products:

Freeze 24/7 Plump Lips Ice Sticks Lip Glosses (First Frost and Brr Berry): bought from www.cheapsmells.com (RRP: £27 - cheapsmells price £10.50!)

Too Faced Lip Injection Extreme (£17 from www.boots.com)

NYX lip pencils in Hot Red and Rose (www.cheapsmells.com)

MAC Blot Powder (£17 www.MACcosmetics.co.uk)

LYNX Fever shower gel (£2 www.sainsburys.co.uk)

Charles Worthington Head Defence Styling Spray (£5.50 www.sainsburys.co.uk)

Sunkissed Highlighting Cream (£2 www.cheapsmells.com)

I used to buy Freeze 24/7 Lip Glosses from Space NK at FULL PRICE (you must be thinking I'm a bit crazy to pay £27 for a lipgloss...) But I mean it when I say it's the best, most effective plumping lip gloss I've ever used. So when I saw it on http://www.cheapsmells.com/ I could scarcely resist it for £10.50 - a mere fraction of what I had been paying! What a result! So I stocked up and bought 2, just in case they discontinue them. So, if you've got baby lips like me... it's well worth a shot! xxx

MAC Lady Danger Lipstick - On.

2010-06-03T18:43:00.003+01:00

Please excuse this rampant posing! Ha.

I am loving red lipstick for summer.
Does it suit me? Hope you think so! X