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FOUR THINGS A MAN NOTICES IN YOU AT FIRST SIGHT

2014-08-08T17:13:00.001+01:00

It is said that a man decides the type of woman a lady is and if he wants to be with her in the first five minutes (or so) he spends with her.

It wasn’t said what exactly he sees that helps him form his decision but it is likely some or all of these things.

-Your Beauty. Men usually notice a woman’s beauty almost immediately they set their eyes on them, it is one of the first things a man sees.

-Body. Just like the beauty, a man notices a woman’s body shape and features almost immediately he sees her. Most men decide if they like what they see in seconds.

-The Lips. Men unlike women tend to think of a woman they find attractive in a sexual way almost immediately they sight them. Your lips are part of the things that draws his attention when he sees you from afar.

-Intellect. Moving from the physical, a man notices a woman’s smartness almost immediately after she has opened her mouth to speak. The way a conversation is carried or that jokes are reacted to would help him form the opinion of what type of person she is.

Spot your area of deficiency and work on it.

EASY WAYS TO GET TO CLIMAX AS A WOMAN

2014-03-22T18:37:00.001+01:00

For most women, reaching orgasm during sex is not exactly an easy thing to do. Some women have never reached orgasm when having sex with their partners and others rarely do.

As much as a lot of women blame themselves for this situation, it is not their problem at all. Studies and books on successful sexual lives have proved that women have less orgasms than men due to a lot of varying reasons, which ranges from the sexual position to the activities done during intercourse by both parties.

This goes to say that as much as men easily reach sexual climax, women aren’t built that way and it is very okay to not reach orgasm every other time. It’s natural so don't be worried.

However most women however are not pleased with this because some of them want to experience the feeling, some need to make their partners know that they are indeed enjoying the sex and it is just simply frustrating for some not to reach orgasm or to ‘come’.

Some of the ways women can easily reach orgasm however includes; Masturbation or sexual position.

Women who are used to masturbating know how to fix the dildo(vibrator) and how to channel them to pleasure themselves. They know how to orgasm with these sexual toys and what to do to get them there.

These type of women already have half their problems solved because next time they have sex with their partners, they can borrow tips from their masturbating sessions and tell their partners where to touch. This would stimulate them and allow them climax.

Another help towards easy climax is the clitoris. Since the clitoris is the most sensitive part of the Vagina and the part that stimulates an easy climax, taking it into consideration might help in your quest on reaching climax easily.

“Let your partner stroke the climax, guide him when he’s doing it so he can know how to do it well and how it would yield results. He could do this while thrusting into you, this would stimulate you and guide you to an easy climax.”

Some sexual positions that you can also try which would make climax happen or boost the chances includes;

1.CAT

The CAT is the coital adjusted technique. Basically this is a face-to-face position, but the man ‘rides much higher’ than he would in the missionary position so that his shoulders and head are about six inches higher up the bed than normal.

What this means is that his penis doesn’t go all the way into the vagina. Instead, the stem or root of it is pulled hard against the clitoris – producing great sensations in that all-important little organ.

The other difference is that instead of taking his weight on his elbows, the man should simply let his bulk slump onto his partner’s upper chest.

2. The free as air position where The man lies down on his back. The woman faces the other way and sits down on his penis. Then, in her own time, she gradually lowers herself so that – with his penis inside her – her back is lying fully outstretched on the front of his body.

The woman can feel genuinely weightless and free-as-air – which is quite a novel sensation. Another bonus is that either partner can touch the clitoris easily. So it’s different and fun – and usually a great time is had by all.

3. The Spoon position Finally, ‘the spoons’.

This is the position where you lie on your side and your man lies curled up round your bottom (like spoons in a drawer) and penetrates you from behind.

Lots of women like this, though not all of them find it easy to orgasm on their sides. But the great advantage here is that either partner can reach round and rub the clitoris. Also, neither of you is having to take the weight of the other.

However, have in mind that there’s no right or wrong position to have sex or reach orgasm. You have to find that which works for you.

THE POWER OF A MAN.

2013-11-22T14:18:00.001+01:00

A man has the power to love a woman in a special way that she has never been loved, & yet hurt her with the same intensity.

A man has the power to treat a woman like a queen & then turn around & make her wish she was never born.
A man has the power to make a woman cry with happiness & joy, then turn around & make her cry with hurt & anger.
A man has the power to let a woman feel free & wanted, but also feel disgusted & unworthy.
A man has the power to look a woman in her face & tell her he loves her, but turn around & sleep with her best friend.
A man has the power to make you fall in love with him within days, & hate him within minutes.
During sex a man has the power to make a woman feel like she’s in heaven, & afterwards makes her feel like she was paid for it.
A man has the power to change a woman from having goals, to living out his goals instead of her own.
A man can get you closer to God, while some can get you so close to becoming a demon worshiper *your choice*.
Why is it that men have such power?
They have so much power, because we give it to them. The power of a man wouldn’t mean anything without a woman.
So ladies when times are hard between you & your man & you realize that he treats you bad, remember that he can only do what you allow him to do to you!!!

SEX AND LOVE !!!

2013-11-20T10:49:00.001+01:00

1. Sex is NOT love. Love is not sex.
2. You can have sex and not be inlove.You can be in love and not engage in sex.
3. A man may hate you and still have sex
with you. Be wise.
4.Using sex to manipulate a man will
eventually fail.
5. It is self deception to think that giving
him sex will make him love you.
6. True Love will never force you to
engage in sex.
7. A man who doesn't love you will not
change his mind because of sex.
8. If he tells you to ‘prove your love’ by
having sex with him. He is only using you.
9. If he is in it for the sex, ‘better sex’ will
take him away from you.
10.Making yourself his ‘sex slave’ is
foolish. Love will never shame or degrade you. If you have made the mistake of trying to use sex to buy this man, now is the time to re-assess your relationship and build it on the right
foundation. If he gets married to you
because ‘the sex is good’, it will be fatal to your marriage. Let him get married to you because he loves you, honors you, feels a strong emotional, mental and spiritual connection with you and wants you to spendthe rest of his life with you.
- SHEILA

3 STATEMENTS EVERY SPOUSE NEEDS TO HEAR.

2013-11-15T13:49:00.001+01:00

1. Honey,I love you.
Far too often,as we get caught up in the
hustle and bustle of everyday life,“I love
you” becomes a quick salutation at
the end of phone conversations and text
messages between spouses. How much
more would it mean if you stopped your
spouse from whatever they were doing,
stared into their eyes and said,“I love
you.” It’s easy to take your husband or
wife’s love for granted.Make the extra
effort to express your feelings for them
and let them know they are loved and
appreciated by you.
2. Baby,I need you.
Merriam-Webster defines the word need
as “a situation in which someone or
something must do or have something.”
Think about that for a
second.When you say to your spouse that
you need them, you are declaring that you
must have them! Tell your partner today
that you need and must have him or her…
just like you need air to breathe.
3. Sugar,I want you.
Never let your spouse wonder if you still
desire them. Make it known that you want
every part of who they are – don’t expect
them to guess.Looks can change over the
years,but what’s most important is that
your spouse knows that,no matter what,
you want them in every
way;mentally,emotionally,and
physically.And there you have it.Whether
you’ve been together two years or
twenty,there’s nothing more powerful than
telling your husband or
wife how much you love, need and want
them.Add those words to the lexicon of
your
marriage or relationship without delay. Be
sure to back them up with actions,too!

OVERCOMING SEXUAL DECEPTION. #LADIES

2013-11-14T23:03:00.001+01:00

1. Sex is NOT love. Love is not sex.

2. You can have sex and not be in-love, You can be in love and not engage in sex.

3. A man may hate you and still have sex with you. Be wise.
4.Using sex to manipulate a man will
eventually fail.
5. It is self deception to think that giving
him sex will make him love you.
6. True Love will never force you to engage in sex.
7. A man who doesn't love you will not
change his mind because of sex.
8. If he tells you to ‘prove your love’ by
having sex with him. He is only using you.
9. If he is in it for the sex, ‘better sex’ will
take him away from you.
10.Making yourself his ‘sex slave’ is foolish. Love will never shame or degrade you.
If you have made the mistake of trying to use sex to buy this man, now is the time to re-assess your relationship and build it on the right foundation. If he gets married to you because ‘the sex is good’, it will be fatal to your marriage. Let him get married to you because he loves you, honors you, feels a strong emotional, mental and spiritual connection with you and wants you to spendthe rest of his life with you.

SHEILA

FACTS LADIES NEED TO KNOW

2013-11-13T17:58:00.001+01:00

Ladies, you can have a pretty face, thick in the waist, and able to give some GRADE A sex, but if you're expecting to get a RING and a trip down the isle based on THAT criteria, be prepared to be legally SINGLE for a looooong time!
Do you know how many women would be MARRIED by now if thats ALL it took???
You're NOT the only DIME out here girl! REAL MEN expect MORE than the above referenced, and REAL WOMEN know this!
So while you hollering what you have to offer, if education, self sufficiency, mother of his kids on PURPOSE material, and CLASS ain't on the menu, HE'LL PASS as far as the "long haul" goes... Better "get your life"...
A REAL LIFE!

....... ........ SHEILA........

6 KEYS TO A GREAT RELATIONSHIP.

2013-11-12T22:20:00.001+01:00

1-FRIENDSHIP: Try to be your spouse best friend. No matter what happens, be a friend first, and a lover later
2-TRUST: The key element to any
relationship is trust, so before starting this beautiful journey with your spouse, learn to trust in all circumstances.
3-UNDERSTANDING: Try to figure out each other and work out on your differences. There are going to be many differences, but it’s mutual compromise and sacrifice which makes this relationship beautiful.
4-COMMUNICATION: Try to talk and
convey your message to your spouse. Let your spouse know about how good/bad your day was along with reminding them how you feel for them.
5-HONESTY: Always speak the truth, never lie or hide things in fear that your spouse won’t understand. Give your spouse a chance to understand you.
6-FREEDOM: Give your spouse space and freedom to decide for themselves. Don’t take away the personal time of your spouse.
When you have practiced all of the above, then trust and believe in God and your self and you will see how beautiful your relationship will be...
- Sheila

WHEN LOVE STARTS TO GET COLD, "LITTLE THINGS MEAN A LOT".

2013-10-30T19:52:00.001+01:00

"Should the sun refuse to shine, should romance run out of rhyme; you alone will hold my heart -- now until the very end of time. "- Verses of Love

The biggest myth in romance is that you must pull off something big and extravagant so that your efforts will matter. The truth is that what will impress your loved one the most will often be the little things.

Little things are rather simple things that you do for your loved one. Despite the fact that they are "little" they can mean so much. Your loved one will be touched that you took the time to show him or her that you care so much. You will be considered thoughtful. All of this plays very well when wishing to be romantic.

Consider your loved one's heart to be a basket. The basket wants to be filled. When you shower your loved one's basket with many, little gifts, the basket will be filled and your loved one will be content and feel loved. It is as simple as that!

Considering the importance of every day little things, think about some new romantic ideas.

Give these a trial lets see how it goes:

* Pay your loved one a compliment, such as how awesome they look.

* Give your loved one a strong hug just because.

* Pick a bouquet of wild flowers or can improvise one with a piece of paper and present them with a kiss.

* Massage their back and/or feet at the end of a work week.

* Leave an "I love you" note on their pillow.

* Call spontaneously at their work to say "I am thinking about you or I miss you."

* Place your arm around your loved one in public nothing brings back love more than this.

Remember, when you take the time to be thoughtful and attentive today, this can usher in more intense romance later on.

WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND OR CONFIDANT?

2013-06-24T22:20:00.001+01:00

Many at times we may have problems very serious problems that saying it out may bring about stigmatization or making you lose your prestige in the society. Equally there are problems that are so killing that without saying it out may cause a parasitic effect within you, not that you really can’t solve this problem but you just need to tell someone about it for the support and encouragement the person has to render to you.

When you don’t have a best friend in your family talking about your sibling or rather your parents(some people don’t really have a very a strong relationship with their parents or sibling) and you may want to talk to a friend who may end up betraying you by telling someone who would tell another person and another so it goes, and before you know it, it goes like you gave a BBC reporter your problem even your parents or people you don’t want to know about it become aware of it.

Now before you can ascertain the right person to tell your dark secret to, you need to have a cordial relationship with the person in question:

How would you know if you have one?

This is a very important question I must say because some people are just so full of deceit that they can go a long way to deceive you in order to get their ends need, because they don’t care about you all they care about is what you are but I assure you that at the end of this post you should be able to distinguish the kind of friends you have.

How to know what a friend can do to you.

When chatting with your friends, their action or words can easily tell the kind of people they truly are and with these few tips you should be able to tell whom your best friend is:

HOW TO GET MORE SEX

2013-06-24T22:03:00.001+01:00

Guys, Here’s how to get more sex guys, guess what? We found out ways to get you in that woman’s bed more often. Ways that’ll ensure that you get laid more than you ever used to and what’s more? With the woman you love doing it with. First, listen, be attentive and be responsive.

Remember what your mom taught you about how to be a man? The part where you listen carefully and follow the right path? Yes, that part is needed under the sheets.

When you touch your woman, listen to her moans, her response and find out what she wants and how she wants it and most importantly, when she needs it. Be timely and be skillful about it as well. Don’t keep asking questions though. The idea is to carefully listen and keep doing what she wants and not to keep asking her every second “do you like that?” “Am I hitting that spot right?” This bores women faster than being forced to watch a cricket game. You’d be almost making her scream “just do it”. Nobody wants her chatty man on top of her, shut up and do your business. Also, do not focus on the nipples alone or the Clit. Some men have assumed a woman’s nipples are the only sensitive part of her body. This is not true; there are loads of women who don’t even get turned on when men tease their nipples. Yes, so this goes to say that there are other “important” spots that you need to discover as a man. How do you discover? You find out by searching. For instance, the boobs itself turns most women on more than their nipples. The sides are sensitive as well, so pay attention to those.

Incorporate kissing into the whole act: For most men, when they kiss during foreplay, they just focus on the sex itself and forget about it during and after the act. Here’s something new to learn, when you kiss before, during and after the sex, it guarantees you a next time. Women love kisses, for them it is a bonding moment and it is more performance during sex. So imagine when you give your woman as much as she needs? She’d look forward to the very next time.

I know of men who are very much sex driven and who have this amazingly great sexual life and who constantly want to add spice in it with their spouses. The problem most times with this group of men is that they do not know where to draw the line between sex and rigorous exercises. Women who are as sex driven as males, don’t even want to go through energy draining and “life threatening” sexual encounters. Some men see some interesting sex position while watching porn and try to incorporate it in their sexual life. That is porn guys, but this is real life. Women love to enjoy sex. No woman wants to rush to the next chemist to buy aboniki (pain killer) or start looking for a professional masseur or a masseuse just because she made love to you. Have it easy. Don’t try everything you see before you hurt someone.

When some guys go down, they get so turned on or maybe fascinated by the clitoris that they begin to tweak it or chew it in a bid to desperately turn their partner on. Stop it! It isn’t chewing gum neither is it some sort of game pad where you push the buttons anyhow. Be gentle. It is a woman’s body part, never forget that. Be easy, watch her and listen to her to know if you are doing it right before you continue. She would give you the keys to the kingdom every other time after that if you just know how to do it.

HOW TO KNOW A MAN IS SERIOUS ABOUT YOU

2013-05-15T00:10:00.001+01:00

There are some few ways that might help you know a man who is in for the real deal and not just.for fun or flirt .

1. He is interested in your life-If you tell him about how nervous you are concerning the next promotion at work or the next big move in your career and he calls you to check how it is going, asking every step of the way how you are feeling, then he is there for real.

Men who want something real don’t hesitate to know everything going on in your life.

2. He is never too busy to call-face it, nobody is too busy to call someone special. An “I called to say I miss you” call won’t last more than a minute, so when you truly care, you won’t be too busy to call. A man who is never to busy to call you and who calls back when he misses your call or text is one who is serious enough. You know why? Because men know how seriously women take the calls they put through to their man. They know women get angry when a man refuses to acknowledge their calls. So when he calls back to say “I’m so sorry I couldn’t reply your message or call at the time…” Or makes it up to you? Then he just might be for real.

3. He is willing to help- whenever you need to get something done and you discuss it with him, if his immediate/automatic response is “so what are you going to do?” Without him offering to help in any way, then he just is not in it for the long term. A man who is into you and wants to start something serious would try to find out how he can help when you are in a fix. Not ask you without being concerned what you want to do. Men like to be men by helping their women and easing their stress. If he cares and is for real, he would offer to help. As simple as that.

4. He is interested in your career-a man who truly wants to be with you will be concerned about your career and your future plans. If he is serious baout your future then it means he is serious about you.

5. He is proud of you-He takes you out and flaunts you whenever he has the chance. He does not leave you standing by yourself while talking to his friends in a party or an event, rather he stands by you and lets everyone know who you are to him.

LET GO OF THE PAST AND TAKE A REBOUND..

2013-02-18T15:04:00.001+01:00

Three weeks after you broke up with your spouse, you meet this awesome, funny and not bad looking person and you decide to move on and maybe start something. Now, the question is, it is just three weeks, is it maybe too soon to move on?
Your friends and loved ones are telling you it just might be and you are not exactly sure of your feelings at the moment, so what then is it? We’ve seen celebrities move on pretty fast after a well-publicized relationship and as much as we do not have lots of those here in Nigeria, it is a norm in Hollywood.
Brad Pitt hooked up with Angelina Jolie just shortly after his marriage with Jennifer Aniston ended and years later, he is still with Jolie, both of them raising a football team together *lol*. We have seen some of them move on fast and had the relationship crashing like a pack of cards and we have also seen some growing stronger.
So it brings us to the question, when exactly is the right time. This answer just might help. When you are in love with someone, you do not want your relationship to end, you give it your all and protect it with everything you have but sometimes things do not go as we plan.
Relationships sometimes end. Now whether you are the “dumper” or the “dumpee” the fact that you have put your feelings and energy into the relationship means it would hurt you no matter how hard you try to resist, if not a lot, at least a bit. If it does hurt, you would need a little time or in some cases, more than a little time to get over that relationship which brings us to this, maybe you should just stay alone for a while. Feelings don’t just disappear overnight, especially since they weren’t developed overnight, so how about you spread your wings, exhale and live life alone for a while? Yes rebound might help but it also gets messy sometimes, so stay off it and enjoy life. And if just shortly after your relationship, you are sure this new person is the one, then still breathe. Yes, enjoy your “me time”, hang out with friends, be among your family and loved ones and love life. If the person is the one, then the person won’t disappear until you are fit enough to be with them. I mean, who wants to be with someone who is carrying baggage from his/her previous relationship anyway?
So breathe and remove every emotional baggage you might still be carrying from your previous relationship so that when you move on, it would be fresh, new and so clean.

::: You may want to see :-

HOW TO KNOW A MAN IS SERIOUS ABOUT YOU

HOW TO RECOGNIZE WARNING SIGNS OF A BREAKUP

HOW TO WIN LOVE BACK

If He Exhibits These Signs In Bed, Then He Is A Guy I Think You Should Keep.

2013-02-18T13:59:00.001+01:00

Its time to identify that one you should keep. Oh yes we are all so kind. You met him, he’s a great listener, keeps good conversation, laughs at the right jokes, no dull moments, is a real gentleman and he is greatly romantic. But for him to get an A(distinction), he has to pass excellently well in bedmatics. Now how can you tell from your first encounter that he is someone you don't want to let go?
Lets roll;

1. Pace not race: he has barely kissed your forehead nor neck or even gotten you ready and now he’s aiming for the pack of condom and getting ready to ease into you and you begin to wonder, has the foreplay even startedyet? If it is your first time doing it and he is like this, then maybe he wants the body(booty) more than he wants you. If he won’t take his time to please you but would rather rush through it just for his own pleasure then woman, he is not a Man you ought to keep. You could call him for sex once a while maybe.

2. Does he kiss well: as old fashioned and boring as kissing may sound, it is the gateway to the “kingdom”. A man who doesn’t bother to kiss you but instead head straight for your buttons while looking for the fastest means to stick his thing(cock) into you is one you shouldn’t be keeping or seeing. Ditch him.

3. Does he listen: he should be able to take his time to please you, while you have your foreplay, he shouldn’t just eat away your vagina like orange or watermelon, he should ask you gently if you like it, watch your reaction as he gently pleases you to know how his moves are making you feel. Your response should determine whether he goes on or not. If he does this, then you should be considering keeping him.

4. Ladies first: even in the bedroom and under the sheets while you guys are naked, yes. He shouldn’t just push your head down and demand for a ''blow-job'', that’ll only be acceptable if he picked you off the road or wherever for a sum.
When he makes love to you, he should take the lead, pleasure you and guide you to reciprocate. We are talking about the first time here ladies! That guy has got to work!

5. And after the party: what happens after the “show”? does he grab his phone, make a phone call, while he walks into the bathroom to freshen up? or does he back you, remove the condom and falls into a deep sleep while he snores like a lion? If this is his immediate reaction, then you know your answer. (RUN AWAY AND DON'T LOOK BACK)

CAN A RELATIONSHIP EXIST WITHOUT COMMUNICATION ?

2012-08-23T11:22:00.001+01:00

Before this question goes into consideration, we first need to look at the meaning of the words relationship and communication then we can ascertain the meaning and give a proper answer.

What is a relationship?
It is a romantic or passionate attachment or a state of affairs existing between those having dealings.

What Is Communication?
It is a process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system and the common system we are talking about here is using the telephone or any Internet social media.

From the above definition, we can vividly see that the “attachment” and “affair” in the word “relationship” is the “communication”.

Now from the previous definitions, we can understand that these two goes hand in hand and then you can ask yourself “CAN A RELATIONSHIP EXIST WITHOUT COMMUNICATION? ”. OF COURSE IT CAN’T, because you cannot claim to be in a relationship without communicating with each other, how do you claim you love someone dear to your heart and yet you can’t tell of the person’s wellbeing or activity.

Communication goes a long way in a relationship because it does not only tell you about the other person’s wellbeing but it also serves as a medium of bringing you both together whenever you both are talking on phone or chatting online pending the distance between the both of you. Exchanging Voice messages, text messages and pictures between yourselves goes a long way in keeping a relationship intact and when the communication is breaking between the both of you, then you can tell that there is an intrusion or a problem somewhere. And this will bring me to say that relationship cannot exist without communication “NO COMMUNICATION NO RELATIONSHIP!!!” Just like the vein carries the blood so does communication carries a relationship.

IS THERE SUCH THING AS A PROPER MEDICATION FOR A BROKEN HEART.

2012-08-10T09:54:00.001+01:00

Being left alone with a broken heart is the saddest feeling anyone can experience. No one enjoys the pain that seems to accompany a break up. The more you cared for and loved the other person, the more a break up tends to hurt. Unfortunately, there is no simple solution or remedy for a broken heart. Does this mean you are destined to feel agony and hurt for the rest of your life? No, of course not. You will not be doomed to feel isolated, depressed, and not want to go anywhere or do anything. There are some steps that can help you get over your broken heart.
The following are some of the steps which you should take to easily deal with all the pains and hurts that you are feeling deep within your heart. While they're certainly not an instant remedy for a broken heart, if you keep them in mind and with the passage of some time, you should be able to feel better.

1.CONTROL YOUR EMOTIONS
It is just pretty normal that your emotions after the break up are so intense that you lose control of yourself. There are actually times when you curse the person whom you loved, especially if they were responsible for the break up. Thus, you have to learn how to control your emotions so that you can be sure that you can easily recover from the break up.
It is to be expected that your emotions go out of control for a while. There is nothing wrong with feeling sad, angry, and depressed, etc...The problem comes when you let those emotions take control of your life. If you need to feel sad or cry, then do it; however, force yourself to stop after a few minutes. If you can take control of your emotions, you will be able to get over the break up, easier and faster.

2.LEARN TO ACCEPT
Try to take an “Everything happens for a reason” attitude. You just have to accept the ending of your relationship with your significant other. Besides, God, fate, destiny, whichever you believe in; probably has a better plan for your love life that you don't even know about. It may be hard to believe this now, but if this wasn't your first relationship, then you know that you can find happiness again, because you've already done it at least once. If you don't learn to accept that it is over, you will only keep re-opening the emotional wounds.

3.LET GO AND MOVE ON
Letting go and moving on goes hand in hand. Hence, once you are certain that you have let go of the romantic bond with your significant other, you can move on and start your new better life. After all, breaking up with your significant other is not the end of your world.

Indeed, you can still get rid of the feeling of sadness after the break up even if there is no remedy for a broken heart. You simply have to put into action the aforementioned steps so that you can recover and start a new life. It may take some time, but don't let it ruin your life. Take the good from the relationship, learn from the bad, and move on.

NEED SOMEHELP ON A MATTER OF TRUST FOR MY NEW GIRLFRIEND.

2012-07-17T18:17:00.003+01:00

Hello reader, this post was made to help a friend who a has a problem with his new relationship please we do hope you drop a helpful comment for him.

I've been seeing this girl in my neighborhood for about 2/3 months. But we made it exclusive and 'official' a few days ago.

Here's my problem, when I first started seeing her, someone close to me, told me to never go out with her, that she'd do something to hurt me and it wouldn't be worth it, although they don't even know her that well at all so I have 'slightly' ignored that.

She's going out with her friends at the weekend, and said to me that she's going to "get drunk and do something stupid"', Obviously by this she means a stupid action of some kind and not something to do with a guy.

But why would you tell your partner you're going to do something stupid, I never would. I’m as loyal as they come, but I don't think loyalty even came into her mind when she said it, she doesn't understand the statement like I have.

So yeah, I can safely say right now, I don't have all the trust for her that I should have, I had nothing but trust for my EX. But this is different and makes me feel so insecure and paranoid about stuff, and makes me feel down to be honest.

Do I talk to her about it? Have I made the wrong move committing a relationship with her?

Please he needs your advice on this matter. What do you think he should do???..

You can appear anonymous if you want to.

WHY ARE SO MANY WOMEN SUDDENLY BI-SEXUAL?

2012-07-17T18:17:00.000+01:00

We've heard different opinions from people, 'because it's seen as cool and guys like it', two 'because they are more free to be honest about their sexuality...'

The truth may be somewhere in between, I think its definitely is a socio-cultural phenomenon, because like lets say 15 years ago it was quite a stigma to say you were bisexual or a lesbian. Then suddenly, from the early 00s I suddenly heard a lot of talk about threesomes, 'experimenting with the same sex' and things like that. I honestly think a lot of women are kind of encouraged to go that way, it's like we may all have the seed of potential, but it's watered by our environment. I actually think pornography has a lot to do in it because like, at least 30% of internet porn seems to be lesbian(girl on girl). Women are also conditioned to see females as the more 'sexy' or desirable gender because of the male dominated viewpoint of sexuality.

I think it's true that women's sexuality is fluid but that of men is probably more fluid than they think. The strength of the stigma is so strong, it kind of drowns everything out. If more women than men are bisexual why has bisexuality seemed to be more common in men in history? I don't think social pressures are the reason because if anything male homosexuality has been stigmatized more than female.

For a while I admit that I had a friend who has this lesbian porn addiction but she's kind of getting over that a bit. This may sound ridiculous, but it

almost seems some women would rather date a really attractive woman rather than an unattractive man? I'd imagine that would feel quite emasculating for some. Do you think that would be common or is it my mere imagination?

''Feminism encourages women to be with other women so they can supposedly 'know their own bodies better' as if they don't already have access to them 24/7'', LOL..

I'm not actually going on a crusade against it, its just that I admit: yes, after watching enough lesbian porn and waking up to the fact I was getting no 'action' because I was the loser who stayed home and watched this **** while at the same time I wasn't getting any dates twisted with my mind), it just seems that the society has made a real fetish over it, it's like in your face with all these celebrities suddenly 'coming out.' with such acts.

Someone said something that sounded quite ridiculous, that men have more 'competition' for hot women from other women, lmao.

Even 10 years ago true bisexuality seemed rare now suddenly 'enlightened' women are just getting in touch with their sexuality. I don't want to degrade lesbians but it seems more like not caring about the gender and doing it out of erotic pleasure, like a kind of mutual masturbation.

Maybe we're not really all bi, but simply do you have the capacity to gain erotic pleasure from both genders?...

Lets hear your say in this matter.

DON'T TRUST THE GIRL TO BUY THE CONDOMS!!!

2012-07-17T18:16:00.001+01:00

I came back from a wedding ceremony on the 7th of July a ceremony i went with a few of my friends. Somehow the subject came up and one of my guy(friend) said that he would never trust a girl to get the condoms because what if she poked a hole in them on purpose. To me he just sounded paranoid, but then again I've never had a pregnancy scare.

I'm just curious, For the guys, do you think that happens or maybe it has happened?

And For the ladies(you can appear as anonymous if you want to), have you ever thought of doing that?

YOUR 5 MINUTES DAILY PROGRAM TO STRESS MANAGEMENT: "RELAXING WITH A MENTAL PDA"

2012-07-05T14:38:00.000+01:00

We all have this favorite expression when it comes to being stressed out, and I wouldn't bother naming all of them since it may also vary in different languages. But when it comes down to it, I think that it is how we work or even relax, for that matter that triggers stress. Ever been stressed even when you're well relaxed and bored? I know I have.

Since Error! Hyperlink reference not valid. is unavoidable in life, it is important to find ways to decrease and prevent stressful incidents and decrease negative reactions to stress. Here are some of the things that can be done by just remembering it, since life is basically a routine to follow like brushing your teeth or eating breakfast. You can do a few of them in a longer span of time, but as they say-- every minute counts.

MANAGING TIME

Time management skills can allow you more time with your family and friends and possibly increase your performance and productivity. This will help reduce your stress.

To improve your time management:

· Save time by focusing and concentrating, delegating, and scheduling time for yourself.

· Keep a record of how you spend your time, including work, family, and leisure time.

· Prioritize your time by rating tasks by importance and urgency. Redirect your time to those activities that are important and meaningful to you.

· Manage your commitments by not over- or under-committing. Don't commit to what is not important to you.

· Deal with procrastination by using a day planner, breaking large projects into smaller ones, and setting short-term deadlines.

· Examine your beliefs to reduce conflict between what you believe and what your life is like.

Build healthy coping strategies

It is important that you identify your coping strategies. One way to do this is by recording the stressful event, your reaction, and how you cope in a stress journal. With this information, you can work to change unhealthy coping strategies into healthy ones-those that help you focus on the positive and what you can change or control in your life.

LIFESTYLE

Some behaviors and lifestyle choices affect your stress level. They may not cause stress directly, but they can interfere with the ways your body seeks relief from stress. Try to:

· Balance personal, work, and family needs and obligations.

· Have a sense of purpose in life.

· Get enough sleep, since your body recovers from the stresses of the day while you are sleeping.

· Eat a balanced diet for a nutritional defense against stress.

· Get moderate exercise throughout the week.

· Limit your consumption of alcohol.

· Don't smoke but if you must, do it responsibly and when the need arises.

SOCIAL SUPPORT

Social support is a major factor in how we experience stress. Social support is the positive support you receive from family, friends, and the community. It is the knowledge that you are cared for, loved, esteemed, and valued. More and more research indicates a strong relationship between social support and better mental and physical health.

Changing thinking

When an event triggers negative thoughts, you may experience fear, insecurity, anxiety, depression, rage, guilt, and a sense of worthlessness or powerlessness. These emotions trigger the body's stress, just as an actual threat does. Dealing with your negative thoughts and how you see things can help reduce stress.

· Thought-stopping helps you stop a negative thought to help eliminate stress.

· Disproving irrational thoughts helps you to avoid exaggerating the negative thought, anticipating the worst, and interpreting an event incorrectly.

· Problem solving helps you identify all aspects of a stressful event and find ways to deal with it.

· Changing your communication style helps you communicate in a way that makes your views known without making others feel put down, hostile, or intimidated. This reduces the stress that comes from poor communication. Use the assertiveness ladder to improve your communication style.

Even writers like me can get stressed even though we're just using our hands to do the talking, but having to sit for 7 or 8 hours is already stressful enough and have our own way to relieve stress. Whether you're the mail guy, the CEO, or probably the average working parent, stress is one unwanted visitor you would love to boot out of your homes, especially your life.

WHY ARE OLDER MEN DATING YOUNGER WOMEN

2012-07-05T14:37:00.001+01:00

Older men dating younger women are becoming a more popular phenomenon, especially in recent years. When an older significant other is with a younger one, this is commonly referred to as a May December romance, because there is a significant age difference between the woman and the man, or the man and the woman. While it appears much more common for younger men to date older women, older men dating younger women is also becoming a popular phenomenon, even though some will view it to be out of place.

Generally speaking, in situations of older men dating younger women, the younger woman is generally looking for something specific. It is a known fact that women can be attracted to older men for a number of reasons. This does not necessarily mean that an early twenties women will date a man of seventy five, but rather relative to their age, women are more than willing to date men who are a few years older than them, and this is how older men dating younger women comes into play.

In many cases, women are looking for their husband to be. The qualities that women are looking for in their future husbands are the same qualities that men slightly older than them are displaying. Most women are more than willing to admit that they are looking for a strong and confident man. Women are not necessarily looking for young and virile hunter gatherer types, but when it comes to older men dating younger women, the qualities that shine through usually begin with a man's ability to support a family, or provide for that family on a long term basis. So usually in situations with older men dating younger women, the woman is looking for a man she can settle down with, regardless of whether or not this is what the man is looking for.

The traits that women are looking for in "husband material" are most commonly found in men aged eighteen and older, and as women age, they are still consistently looking for someone older, because it is assumed that older men are more civilized, more mature and more capable of providing for whoever they are with. This is the reason why older men dating younger women is becoming commonplace today. Women are constantly on the lookout for someone older and more mature, and most men seem to have no problem providing most of what these women are looking for, as they get to date younger as a result.

In these situations of older men dating younger women, the men are looking for something completely different, because most do not select younger women as ideal wife material. Still, in these situations, both the man and the woman in the relationship seem to get the traits and characteristics that they need, and if the relationship works and everyone is satisfied, that's really all there is.

TOP 3 REASONS WHY MEN DUMP WOMEN

2012-07-05T14:36:00.001+01:00

No one likes to be rejected. This is especially true for women. One form of rejection is being dumped by the person whom you really love or are in a relationship with. Being dumped is never fun. It can be the source of a great deal of pain, confusion, anger, and hurt.

There was a time when women were the ones who did the vast majority of dumping. However, this certainly isn't true anymore. Men, increasingly, are dumping women. As a woman, who has been dumped, you may not fully understand the motives behind his actions. Men are not quite as complex as women, when it comes to these sorts of things. This article was written to help you find some of the answers to the question of “why men dump women?”

Here are the top three reasons of why men dump women:

1. LACK OF COMMUNICATION

Communication is very important in every relationship. A lack of communication would definitely mean the end of a relationship. Hence, it is often cited as one of the top reasons of why men break up with the woman they are with.

2. WOMEN BECOME DEMANDING

Another reason why women are dumped by men is because as time goes by, they become more and more demanding. Women, Western women in particular, have a tendency to try and control anything and everything about the relationship, sometimes even the man himself. They often will try to set rules and limits on their male counterpart. Women often will give the men a hard time about them hanging out with their friends, what they watch on T.V., working late, etc...Some men will tolerate this type of behavior. However, the ones that finally get fed up with it, and end it, usually cite this as a reason why they broke up.

3. BEING TOO RELIANT ON MEN

There are times when women become too clingy, needy, and reliant on their man. Its okay for a woman to play up the “damsel in distress” routine once in a while. In fact, most men enjoy playing the role of “hero.” However, it can be taken too far and becomes quite annoying if done on a regular basis. Most men want a woman who is independent, and can make decisions on her own. Some women insist that the man spend every free minute of every free day with her. It is healthy for people in a relationship to have lives outside the relationship. If the woman makes the man the center of her life and becomes too obsessed, it usually will be too much for the man.

Indeed, it is not only women who hold the power to dump men because men also have that power. These reasons are by no means conclusive. There are many reasons why men dump women. The best thing you can do if you were dumped by a man, is to learn from your mistakes, and try not to repeat them in the next relationship.

LIFE MAPPING: A VISION OF SUCCESS

2012-07-05T14:35:00.001+01:00

“How do I achieve Success?” A question every man or woman would want to ask him or herself. Success is more than economic gains, titles, and degrees. Planning for success is about mapping out all the aspects of your life. Similar to a map, you need to define the following details: origin, destination, vehicle, backpack, landmarks, and route.

ORIGIN: WHO YOU ARE

A map has a starting point. Your origin is who you are right now. Most people when asked to introduce themselves would say, “Hi, I’m Yvonne and I am a 22-years old, university (senior highschool) student.” It does not tell you about who Yvonne is; it only tells you her present preoccupation. To gain insights about yourself, you need to look closely at your beliefs, values, and principles aside from your economic, professional, cultural, and civil status. Moreover, you can also reflect on your experiences to give you insights on your good and not-so-good traits, skills, knowledge, strengths, and weaknesses. Upon introspection, Yvonne realized that she was highly motivated, generous, service-oriented, but impatient. Her inclination was in the biological-medical field. Furthermore, she believed that life must serve a purpose, and that wars were destructive to human dignity.

DESTINATION: A VISION OF WHO YOU WANT TO BE

“Who do want to be?” this is your vision. Now it is important that you know yourself so that you would have a clearer idea of who you want to be; and the things you want to change whether they are attitudes, habits, or points of view. If you hardly know yourself, then your vision and targets for the future would also be unclear. Your destination should cover all the aspects of your being: the physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual. Continuing Yvonne’s story, after she defined her beliefs, values, and principles in life, she decided that she wanted to have a life dedicated in serving her fellowmen.

VEHICLE: YOUR MISSION

A vehicle is the means by which you can reach your destination. It can be analogized to your mission or vocation in life. To a great extent, your mission would depend on what you know about yourself. Bases on Yvonne’s self-assessment, she decided that she was suited to become a doctor, and that she wanted to become one. Her chosen vocation was a medical doctor. Describing her vision-mission fully: it was to live a life dedicated to serving her fellowmen as a doctor in conflict-areas.

TRAVEL BAG: YOUR KNOWLEDGE, SKILLS, AND ATTITUDE

Food, drinks, medicines, and other travelling necessities are contained in a bag. Applying this concept to your life map, you also bring with you certain knowledge, skills, and attitudes. These determine your competence and help you in attaining your vision. Given such, there is a need for you to assess what knowledge, skills, and attitudes you have at present and what you need to gain along the way. This two-fold assessment will give you insights on your landmarks or measures of success. Yvonne realized that she needed to gain professional knowledge and skills on medicine so that she could become a doctor. She knew that she was a bit impatient with people so she realized that this was something she wanted to change.

LANDMARKS AND ROUTE: S.M.A.R.T. OBJECTIVES

Landmarks confirm if you are on the right track while the route determines the travel time. Thus, in planning out your life, you also need to have landmarks and a route. These landmarks are your measures of success. These measures must be specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time bound. Thus you cannot set two major landmarks such as earning a master’s degree and a doctorate degree within a period of three years, since the minimum number of years to complete a master’s degree is two years. Going back to Yvonne as an example, she identified the following landmarks in her life map: completing a bachelor’s degree in microbiology by the age of 21; completing medicine by the age of 27; earning her specialization in infectious diseases by the age of 30; getting deployed in local public hospitals of their town by the age of 32; and serving as doctor in war-torn areas by the age of 35.

ANTICIPATE TURNS, DETOURS, AND POTHOLES

The purpose of your life map is to minimize hasty and spur-of-the-moment decisions that can make you lose your way. But oftentimes our plans are modified along the way due to some inconveniences, delays, and other situations beyond our control. Like in any path, there are turns, detours, and potholes thus; we must anticipate them and adjust accordingly.

LEADERSHIP EXPOSED: THINGS YOU THOUGHT YOU KNEW ABOUT LEADERSHIP

2012-07-05T14:33:00.001+01:00

Much has been written about leadership: rules, pointers, styles, and biographies of inspiring leaders throughout world history. But there are certain leadership ideas that we ourselves fail to recognize and realize in the course of reading books. Here is a short list of things you thought you knew about leadership.

1. Leaders come in different flavors.

There are different types of leaders and you will probably encounter more than one type in your lifetime. Formal leaders are those we elect into positions or offices such as the senators, legislators, congressmen, and presidents of the local clubs. Informal leaders or those we look up to by virtue of their wisdom and experience such as in the case of the elders of a tribe, or our grandparents; or by virtue of their expertise and contribution on a given field such as Albert Einstein in the field of Theoretical Physics and Leonardo da Vinci in the field of the Arts. According to extensive research, both formal and informal leaders practice a combination of leadership styles.

· Lewin’s three basic leadership styles – Authoritative, Participative, and Delegative

· Likert’s four leadership styles – Exploitive Authoritative, Benevolent Authoritative, Consultative, and Participative

· Goleman’s six emotional leadership styles - Visionary, Coaching, Affiliative, Democratic, Pacesetting, and Commanding.

2. Leadership is a process of becoming.

Although certain people seem to be born with innate leadership qualities, without the right environment and exposure, they may fail to develop their full potential. So like learning how to ride a bicycle, you can also learn how to become a leader and hone your leadership abilities. Knowledge on leadership theories and skills may be formally gained by enrolling in leadership seminars, workshops, and conferences. Daily interactions with people provide the opportunity to observe and practice leadership theories. Together, formal and informal learning will help you gain leadership attitudes, gain leadership insights, and thus furthering the cycle of learning. You do not become a leader in one day and just stop. Life-long learning is important in becoming a good leader for each day brings new experiences that put your knowledge, skills, and attitude to a test.

3. Leadership starts with you.

The best way to develop leadership qualities is to apply it to your own life. As an adage goes “action speaks louder than words.” Leaders are always in the limelight. Keep in mind that your credibility as a leader depends much on your actions: your interaction with your family, friends, and co-workers; your way of managing your personal and organizational responsibilities; and even the way you talk with the newspaper vendor across the street. Repeated actions become habits. Habits in turn form a person’s character. Steven Covey’s book entitled 7 Habits of Highly Effective People provides good insights on how you can achieve personal leadership.

4. Leadership is shared.

Leadership is not the sole responsibility of one person, but rather a shared responsibility among members of an emerging team. A leader belongs to a group. Each member has responsibilities to fulfill. Formal leadership positions are merely added responsibilities aside from their responsibilities as members of the team. Effective leadership requires members to do their share of work. Starting as a mere group of individuals, members and leaders work towards the formation of an effective team. In this light, social interaction plays a major role in leadership. To learn how to work together requires a great deal of trust between and among leaders and members of an emerging team. Trust is built upon actions and not merely on words. When mutual respect exists, trust is fostered and confidence is built.

5. Leadership styles depend on the situation.

How come dictatorship works for Singapore but not in the United States of America? Aside from culture, beliefs, value system, and form of government, the current situation of a nation also affects the leadership styles used by its formal leaders. There is no rule that only one style can be used. Most of the time, leaders employ a combination of leadership styles depending on the situation. In emergency situations such as periods of war and calamity, decision-making is a matter of life and death. Thus, a nation’s leader cannot afford to consult with all departments to arrive at crucial decisions. The case is of course different in times of peace and order---different sectors and other branches of government can freely interact and participate in governance. Another case in point is in leading organizations. When the staffs are highly motivated and competent, a combination of high delegative and moderate participative styles of leadership is most appropriate. But if the staffs have low competence and low commitment, a combination of high coaching, high supporting, and high directing behavior from organizational leaders is required.

Now that you are reminded of these things, keep in mind that there are always ideas that we think we already know; concepts we take for granted, but are actually the most useful insights on leadership.

HOW TO RECOGNIZE WARNING SIGNS OF A BREAKUP

2012-07-05T14:32:00.001+01:00

Breaking up is the saddest ending of any relationship. No one wants it to happen and it can also leave you feeling confused and shocked. This is because we feel rejected. We feel betrayed. Self-doubt along with every possible human emotion will come to the surface after a break up.

One of the worst parts about a break up is when the thought “Could I have prevented this break up?” creeps into your mind. If you've ever experienced a break up before you know you're going to go through the “I should have done this” and the “I wish I wouldn't have done that” phase.

People who do break up, under certain circumstances, can get back together again. However, its best to try and prevent a break up from happening. If you think your relationship may be in peril, you need to act quickly.

Thus, it is essential for you to be aware on the warning signs of a breakup so that you can have enough time to prepare yourself. You can take steps to try to prevent anything you don't want to happen from occurring. If you recognize warning sings of a break up, you stand a better chance of being able to prevent the break up from happening.

Here are some of the most common warning signs of a breakup:

Avoidance – This is the most obvious sign of a possible breakup. Your significant other tends to avoid you as well as your phone calls. In fact, if it seems that your significant other would rather spend time with other people than you, your relationship could be in trouble. For example, if your significant other spent only once a week with friends but is now going out with them three times a week, that's a strong warning sign.

Lack Of Communication – It is undeniable that communication is one of the major ingredients in a happy relationship. Hence, there is something to worry about once you have noticed that the communication between you and your significant other becomes blurry. And once your relationship lacks good communication then it certainly means that a break up is possible. For example, if your significant other would rather read a novel, magazine or go to bed early than talk to you or watch a movie, this could be a warning sign. This factor kind of goes hand in hand with avoidance.

Conflicts and Arguments – The display of argumentative behavior is another warning sign of a forthcoming breakup. Let's be honest, every relationship has its problems. There are very few, if any, relationships where arguments never happen. In a perfect world, arguments wouldn't happen. It's just human nature. The key here is the frequency of arguments and the level of hostility your significant other is displaying. If you notice your significant other seems to be picking fights a lot more lately, than your relationship may be in trouble. This is because arguing all the time is a good technique that your significant other can use to show you that you are not compatible with each other and that you need to end your relationship. In other words, it will help them justify their intentions of breaking up.

Indeed, it is essential for you to be aware on the warning signs of a possible breakup just like the ones mentioned above. They can help you to be prepared and may be able to help you stop the break up and the pain that goes along with it.