Episode #47 – The Girl Time Episode

On this episode Bernie finally gets to sit down with his best friend of all time, Alice, and his adopted sister (alice’s real little sister) Mary.  Alice, Mary, & Candace all work in the local Wilmington Theatre industry; but we learn that things are always normal and can get a little perverted…

Miss Kara must warn you that if you DO NOT like the word VAGINA please do not listen to this episode .  If you’re okay with it then you will have a fun time enjoying lots of great stories from these three best friends, yes, favorite old tv shows, road trip stories, random tangents, Bernie is just one of the girls. 46 minutes.

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Music: “Fast Talkin” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 3.0″http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

Episode #46 – Bernie’s Drunken Hung Over Post Birthday Episode.

On this episode Bernie welcomes local service industry professionals John & Jordan to discuss the crazy antics of the fine drunk people of Wilmington.  Hear about Bernie & John’s encounters with sexual deviants in a variety of downtown establishments, and get ready for the 2013 Azalea Festival by listening to everyone rant about how annoying bar patrons can be during holidays and festivals.  And since everyone is still a little tipsy from celebrating Bernie’s birthday, this episode is even funnier than normal. 45 minutes

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Music: “Fast Talkin” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 3.0″http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

Episode #45.  Bernie welcomes Matt Keen owner of Wilmington’s only record store, Gravity Records, to sit down with him and Candace and talk about all things ‘small business’.  Needless to say they tell many hilarious stories about the many patrons that they have served.  Druggies, Racists, & Crazy Hippie Chicks, Oh my!  32 minutes.

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Music: “Fast Talkin” and “Walking Along” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 3.0″http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

The Boys Going on Tangents / Romantic Episode.  Bernie welcomes Ryan Pierce and Quinn Tooman for a themed episode…tune in to find out the theme.  Miss Kara believes this is the funniest episode of this podcast.  39 minutes.

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Or simply listen or download using the embedded player.

Music: “Fast Talkin” and “Walking Along” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 3.0″http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

The We Survived the Apocalypse Episode.  Bernie and Candace welcome the lovely Molly West from the Blue Post to discuss 2012′s crazy bar stories, obnoxious trivia players, and Molly’s no-strings-attached travel plans.  45 minutes.

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Or simply listen or download using the embedded player.

Music: “Fast Talkin” and “Walking Along” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 3.0″http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

The Costa Rica Episode.  Bernie and Candace welcome two of Bernie’s favorite people in the whole wide world, Adam and Vanessa Keen.  40 minutes.

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Music: “Fast Talkin” and “Walking Along” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 3.0″http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

LUMPletters vol. 5 no. 14

Twenty years and some odd months ago, I was working a Sunday shift at a short-lived bar called the Well-Informed when my buddy Shawn Stovall showed up with a pair of new friends.  John Butler was from Dublin, Ireland, but had been in the States for a few years, where he met his future wife Lori Freshwater.  Lori was originally from Jacksonville, and they had been back in the area for a short while with ambitions of opening their own bar, after having met while working together at an Irish pub in NYC.  We hit it off immediately, but I was very hesitant when they told me where they were planning on opening up, though I kept it to myself.

The former Rathskeller had had a very brief life when I first moved to Wilmington, in 1987.  Never once had I set foot in the bar (not surprising, since I was underage when it was around), and I wasn’t alone in that regard.  My only real experience with the place, and its only claim to fame, was that it was the shooting location for the bar scenes in the short-lived local soap opera “Wilmington Heat.”  At the point that it was around, there were only four or five bars in downtown, and the neighborhood was still suffering from the rep it earned in the seventies and eighties as a place to avoid after sunset.  The location was out of the way, hidden and unknown, and at this was during a time when all of those things worked against it.

After John and Lori had left that first evening, I mentioned all these things to Shawn, and he looked at me knowingly and agreed, but said he was trying to be positive.  The first night I met them, I had already written off the bar that they had yet to open.  I put the whole thing out of my mind, and would have assumed that that would be the end of the story, for ever and ever, amen.

Months later, my best friend Alice and I decided to go out for a few drinks on a lazy mid-week night in December.  It was just before Christmas, and I think that that was all anyone had on their minds.  We started out by hitting up the Well-Informed (current location of Side-Bar), where a handful of people were sitting in the dark and the bartender was playing an album that I can only describe as German funeral dirges.  It was miserable and we couldn’t down our beers fast enough to get out of there.  There still weren’t many options downtown at this point, and our next stop was the old Mint Juleps, located in the Stemmerman’s Inn building.  This was a great bar, but once again, it was a dead night downtown and we were pretty bored here, as well.  The bartender, sensing we were ready to leave, suggested that we try out the new bar, Lula’s, in the basement next door.  I suddenly remembered John and Lori.  Sure, we thought, we’ll stop in, have a pint, and then call it a night and go home for a little Trivial Pursuit (that would surely be more exciting than anything else outside my front door).

Lori was behind the bar and recognized me immediately.  Even though there were only a few people here, as well, they were the right people, and the atmosphere was so warm and inviting, that all thoughts of leaving and board games disappeared from our minds.  We sat at a table and were astonished when Last Call popped out of nowhere, as the time just ran away from us.  The most remarkable moment of that night was when I looked at Alice while we were discussing how much we loved our new favorite hangout, and said, “Alice, never let me work here, I want a place where I can just hang out and enjoy myself.”  The bitch let me down, and four months later I was working for John and Lori at their second bar Bessie’s.  It’s now two decades later to the week, and I’m preparing to go downstairs to celebrate our Lulaversary.

I own the bar.  I love the bar.  And, it sometimes consumes me.  But, that’s okay.  I only hope to see you all for our fortieth anniversary.  Here’s to John and Lori and all the chances they’ve taken in life.

The Halloweenie Episode.  Bernie and Candace welcome fellow Halloween fans, Ali and Chris.  Miss Kara gets a little freaked out.  47 minutes.

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Or simply listen or download using the embedded player.

Music: “Fast Talkin” and “Walking Along” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 3.0″http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

The Out of Left Field Episode.  Bernie welcomes Stephanie Shumante, the first Lula’s employee to appear on the podcast.  Jimbosuave passes the editing baton to Miss Kara.  45 minutes.

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Or simply listen or download using the embedded player.

Music: “Fast Talkin” and “Walking Along” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 3.0″http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

THE LAST OF THE HALLOWEEN LIST

41.  “Spider Baby”  (1968)

This is a fairly unknown cult classic about a deranged inbred family and the trouble they cause.  It’s much more of a campy, insane goofball romp than a “Hills Have Eyes” type of story.  The daughters are gleeful and malicious and the brother (Sid Haig in a very early role) is a rambunctious puppy dog of a hillbilly.  It’s also notable in that Lon Chaney provides his final film role as the loving uncle just trying to keep that status quo.

42.  “Splinter”  (2008)

This was a surprising indie sleeper.  It almost reminds me of something from the zombie survival model, but there are no actual zombies.  When two couples (a criminal couple and hostage couple) find an unattended gas station in the middle of nowhere, they’re shocked to discover that something is infecting every living thing in its path and now has them trapped.  I really enjoyed the film, but made the mistake of listening to the commentary track which basically consisted of a bunch of actors patting themselves on the back for their genius on a film that almost no one saw.

43.  “Stake Land” (2008)

I’m not usually one for the vampire flicks, but this is more of a vampire apocalypse, so it’s almost as good as zombies.  It’s also a movie that I was surprised that I like, because it’s one of those rare gems where a talented group of people obviously know how to make a great film with a very limited budget.  Beyond that, the script is unforgiving and sticks to its guns without falling into the kind of sentimentality that a big studio would have demanded they give into.

44.  “Thir13een Ghosts”  (2001)

You very likely have heard of this one (there are a couple of fairly well-known items rounding out the list), but I think that it’s one that most people disregarded and skipped over, and that’s a real shame.  It’s perfect for this time of the year and getting in the spirit.  Visually, it’s spot-on and I think the story really holds up as well.  The 13 ghosts in question are all well-definied arch types, and the modernization of the haunted house truly works.  Plus, the DVD has a great feature on each of the ghosts (one of the better bonus features I’ve seen for a good long while).

45.  “Trailer Park of Terror” (2008)

Another shocker that I didn’t honestly expect to like.  More zombies meet redneck fun.  It’s not a look over your shoulder thriller, but it’s a good bit of monster/gore fun that’s got the spirit of the season all up on it.

46.  “Trick ‘r Treat”  (2007)

This is so much one of my favorites that I replaced my DVD with a Blu-Ray copy this year.  I absolutely have to watch it every Halloween (and, may watch it a second time this year if things don’t pick up).  It’s a series of vignettes that all tie together in a small town that really knows how to celebrate the holiday.  It’s the place I would dream that I could be on October 31st (well, except for the serious chance of not making it through the night).  I can’t recommend this one to you enough.

47.  “Tucker and Dale VS Evil” (2010)

This one has become pretty well known, but it is one of the most recent decent finds in my little world.  It takes the backwoods, crazed redneck slasher genre and puts it in reverse.  Our titular heroes just want to spend a weekend in the woods fixing up their new used cabin, but a group of college kids keep interrupting them by committing suicide on them.  It’s hilarious and fun and I’d recommend it almost as much as #46.  (obviously, I recommend all of these, or what’s the purpose of this list)

48.  “Undead” (2003)

When meteorites his a small Australian fishing village, most of its citizens are turned into ravenous zombies.  This juicy horror romp has it all:  zombies, spaceships, aliens, zombie fish and the coolest shotgun ever created by man.  Overall, I have to say I’m a pretty big fan of the Australian horror flick.  Actually, I like a majority of the Australian movies I’ve seen, overall.  This one does not disappoint.  It’s been a few years since I’ve seen it, but as I recall, it’s worth it for the zombie fish alone.

47.  “Vacancy”  (2007)

I haven’t seen many films that center on the concept of snuff films, but this one does it right and creepy.  A couple breaks down in a remote location and are forced to stay in a small motel.  There they discover that their room has hosted a series of murder movies and they are slated to be the next stars.  Frank Whaley, who has always been known for his baby face and nice guy roles, is monstrously freaky as the desk clerk who manipulates all of the events.

50.  “MOH:  The Washingtonians”  (2007)

This is really a weak sister to end this list that I’ve been working on for two months.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s on the list for a reason, it’s just not much of a grand finale.  Most of the episodes that I’ve seen of the Masters of Horror series I found to be disappointing, but this one was actually a good bit of fun.  Plus, it’s only an hour long, so it’s good for filling in those movie gaps you might experience.  The long and short of it is that the founder of our nation developed a taste for human flesh, and developed a secret society that exists until this day.

Well, ghoulies and ghoulettes, I hope that you’ve enjoyed this list.  Hopefully, at least some of you have been helped to discover some new Halloween spirit.