Lula's Grace

Lula News Fall 2011

2011-10-14T07:49:00.000-07:00

So we've had a pretty good bit of time since my last post, huh? Life has been a whirlwind but settling back in rhythm it appears. I wanted to make sure you knew of an excellent opportunity to follow a worldwide conversation discussing Brene Brown's book "The Gifts of Imperfection". I have posted Dr. Brown's TEDx talk on my Facebook page several months ago and here again recently and highly recommended her book the beginning of this year. If you followed my blog with http://www.onlineorganizing.com/ you know I have used her book as a metaphor for many issues we face with chronic disorganization. Living a life with purpose effects us and even the relationships we have with others greatly, now we can participate with other "ordinary people" November 20th in a virtual discussion of her principles...
visit http://www.eventbrite.com/event/2154257442/efblike to check out this event!!!

You're halfway there!!!

2011-04-11T18:16:00.001-07:00

That is what the subject of the email from one of the pregnancy newsletters I had subscribed to before our miscarriage said when I opened it up.

"20 weeks! Congratulations...You're at the halfway mark!!"

Each week I open these updates and think...I've gotta get off this mailing list. What's gonna happen when it starts reminding me to pack my bag?

But then I look at that line again and review the last 20 weeks. I have made major transitions, I've gone back to work, I've decided to donate quite a lot of my time as an organizer to help others through charity and pushed by speaking more and more.

I also know I am letting other things completely slide. I gotta get a "working girl" system going on this house, I need to let others know I no longer can participate instead of dragging on like I can keep that plate on it's stick.

Certain things fall below the line...and all it would take is a simple confession of..."take me off the mailing list"

While I know I am working more, I am also renewed at the opportunity for tackling something new and more challenging. I know I have to watch it...not less my stress overrun my life. Not feed my anxiety addiction and people pleasing defenses to run my body and mind in the ground.

In our lesson plans at the farm, we have a measurable device for setting our rider's objectives. I kinda look at my experience with the pregnancy newsletter as a measurable device. I see how far I've come in 20 weeks. I am still broken inside, the wound is still healing and I know it's gonna leave a scar...scar's are humbling though. They keep you honest.

My favorite line in Ya Ya Sisters is when the oxygen sucking Ya Ya tells Sidda "Old wounds heal pal" with a quaint smurk.

I see those subject lines each week and I keep thinking...you're okay still. Life goes on.

As I get ready to turn 37 I notice more of the big ideas I have lately seem to carry the undertone of midlife crisis. I've been thinking about bringing my little 1970 convertible Fiat Spider home to rebuild just for putting around town to the barn and carpool. Look...I though I was cute 20 years ago in it. I'd be a mess in it today!!

Its taken me 20 years to learn how to be an adult. Now that I am one I want to take full advantage of it!!Cue Mary J. Blige "No more drama in my life..." I'm so good where I am right now but if I've learned anything you gotta be ready to keep it moving.

In many ways i am halfway there...but I know still have so much to experience and learn. After all, I'm a Thursday's child, we have far to go don't we??!!

2011-03-28T13:45:00.002-07:00

Melissa Herron Searcy via Goodwill Industries of Central Alabama, Inc.
‎"Clean Sweep Donation Drive" on Sat., April 9th in front of Rave Theater from 9 a.m - 12 noon. Clean out your clutter and get registered to win prizes from Well-Done Carpet Cleaning, Peaches ‘N Clean, Makita Tools, the Rave and much more. Bring pictures of your cluttered space and we’ll have Melissa Searcy, a professional... organizer and interior decorator with Lulagrace Interiors on site giving tips.

Very excited to be in Montgomery on the 9th!!

2011-03-28T13:45:00.000-07:00

http://www.algoodwill.org/page/clean-sweep-donation-drive

Living a life uncontained. Speech given to Prof. Women in Building in Montgomery, AL

2011-03-27T08:17:00.000-07:00

My name is Melissa Searcy, owner of Lulagrace Organized Interiors. I have been in business since 2006, formerly in Montgomery. After working at the Montgomery Advertiser for several years and taking some time off after an automobile accident… I took the Principles of Interior Decorating class at Auburn University of Montgomery and ended up interning at Robert F. Henry Tile Company. My career began with some of the women in this very room.
Here’s what Ive learned in over 5 years of business as a professional organizer. By the way, this isn’t the run of the mill speech on how to organize your belongings by putting 4 walls around them and sort all your like items together.
Those are indeed the very things I should say because they are true but being organized comes with a bigger commitment than just a trip to IKEA for matching hangers.
　
In the same time that I’ve been building my business I’ve also become an avid equestrian. Volunteering with Montgomery Area Non-traditional Equestrians in 2007 I became a NARHA (North American Riding for Handicapped Assoc) certified therapeutic riding instructor in 2008. I had no idea where it was going to take me or why I was doing it but I decided to pursue whatever opportunities came at me. This was the only time in my life where I said I will do whatever I feel called to do. I had just read Max Lucado’s book Cure for the Common Life and had determined my life was too common.

That summer my husband and I moved to NW Alabama where I’ve continued to work as a certified Instructor. I have spent a lot of time teaching children and adults with special needs and working with horses in a natural way to promote the best behavior from a therapy horse we can get. What I’ve learned is that adults with autism and children too, don’t see social cues like we do. They don’t feel shame or guilt at calling someone fat. What you see is what you get. No hidden agendas, no propensity to lie.
　
Since our move, we’ve picked right back up with my business, lots of new commitments to church and new friends. Living in a small community you end up working at a much discounted rate because you tend to run into your clients more often. It’s very hard to charge full price to someone who sits in your church pew at the early service. So, I’ve continued to work out of town a lot.
When I go in to begin a project out of town, I normally spend 2-3 days with them getting it done. It isn’t a standing once a week appointment one hour or so. It’s hardcore, getting in the trenches type of stuff. It’s emotionally exhausting to work this intense all the time. Rapid fire therapy sessions along with the backbreaking labor.
As a professional organizer it is my job to determine the best cause of action after spending some time with a client and reading some behavioral cues. That comes from a few patterns of how someone is going to behave when you make them face fears about clearing some of their baggage. It could go well or it could go really bad. You never know what you are going to find or where that person has been for that matter. A lot of my clients have had trauma.
Clutter is merely a symptom of larger issues. Much like weight gain & compulsive shopping, clutter can become a waving flag saying “somethings wrong here”. The latin root of the word clutter is clot. It’s like a heart attack.
Many of us today lead extremely busy lives, the house tends to be the first thing that gets put on the backburner. Our sanctuary that has to function as a moving assembly line can often times take the direct hit when we mismanage our priorities.

When I began my business I was thrilled to be busy. A corporate advertising executive turned entreprenuer and new mom…I was beside myself for being able to manage to do it all. It was thrilling to juggle.
My parents have never been prouder or more concerned about my health.
In 5 years I’ve been on local news stations in Bham and Montgomery over 4 times, published in Montgomery Living, Montgomery Parents, the Advertiser, Daily Mountain Eagle, local radio segments numerous times, I’ve blogged over 500 times for national online companies. I’ve spoken nearly 30 times and have taught seminars on organizing classes at local colleges.
In addition to running Lula, I sit on 2 councils for church, teach Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University 13 weeks out of the year, coordinate and plan events two times a year for UMW, participate in women’s circle group once a month, host a staff meeting once a month where Im also the executive assistant at a local therapuetic riding center and still instruct up to 4 classes each session, I’ve also become the state chairperson for our governing body NARHA and I’m room mother for my son’s kindergarten class.
In these last 6 months I’ve also had one miscarriage, more than 10 anxiety attacks, a surgical breast biopsy, MRSA staph infections, and one lawsuit, lost a beloved dog and a cat. I’ve all but thrown in the towel. And now I’m three hours away from my family. My momma isn't able to come and help me pick up my pieces!

In those moments of panic coming on…when Im holding the shower stall wall, focusing, breathing and saying the word “forward” I think how did I get here again? It always comes down to “ I said Yes”

I know I’ve got to simplify. I do the same thing my clients do. We are people pleasers this generation of ours. We are caught between being our stay at home grandmothers/mothers and the working women portrayed in bad 80’s movies.
I can’t say no, so I take more on, I let my house suffer first because I’m never home. When I am home I’m too tired or too preoccupied with the laptop to be present with my family and chores. Being present is something I’ve been working toward and happy to say it is still an upheld new years resolution. I try each week to do better than the last. Because it’s HARD! There are a lot of distractions out there.
Having a successful business is difficult to turn your back on. But when your clients are sharing such intimate details with you the weight of their baggage can have its effect. You tend to feel responsible for complete strangers. Something I see many of my friends doing when they are approached to help someone out. We can help too much at times and we can enable those we think we are helping to actually get worse and sometimes sacrificing our own sanity. Until we get to the root of why we do this, we can’t move forward.

I have cried with a client at their kitchen table on more than one occasion at the opportunity for break through. Witnessing their forgiving and releasing fear makes them turn the corner on tossing unnecessary possessions.
Only then are they able to see the clutter for what it represents, allowing the emotions necessary to come forward and be processed.
The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak. ~Hans Hofmann, Introduction to the Bootstrap, 1993

So often we mask emotions with busying our lives. We over commit, we run ourselves ragged, we “do” and when we feel like we can’t cram anymore in we do more.
There is this fear of not being enough. Of not being worthy unless we are demonstrating how multifaceted we all are. We must show that it is possible to go go go go and not suffer from it.
As a result Dr. Brene Brown, author of The Gifts of Imperfection” states we are “a nation of exhausted adults raising overscheduled children.’ We are also one of the most over-medicated, addicted, in debt, obese people in the world.
We have a sickness as a nation that we focus on in Dave Ramsey of spending more to ease inadequacies, allowing others to tell us how to spend our money, fear of not measuring up and never being “somebody”.
　
Or maybe we’ve lost something, a parent, a child, or a divorce. Maybe we didn’t allow ourselves to grieve. Life happens, and if we have this cracked foundation of people pleasing we don’t rebound as quickly from the life happening part.
Our resiliency is the only thing which allows us to process healthy emotions and move on with our purpose. Knowing we are on the right path and decreasing the distractions that take us off of it.

We bargain all the time with shame and guilt. We have to accept that we are not perfect. For most of us this turns into terms like “ I thrive on chaos”. I’m a great multi-tasker!! Works well under pressure!!
Being a “perfectionist” is not necessarily a good trait to have. It is a coping mechanism just like the shopping and eating. Clutter and hoarding belongings can become a very real numbing technique. Just look at the show Hoarders.
We can even become addicted to anxiety. Usually it comes with a mis- perception that running around crazy all the time is a good thing. As Dr. Brown says
“We know it’s coming. For many of us, our first response to vulnerability and pain … is not to lean into the discomfort and feel our way through but rather to make it go away. We do that by numbing and taking the edge off the pain with whatever provides the quickest relief. We can anesthetize with a whole bunch of stuff, including alcohol, drugs, food, sex, relationships, money, work, caretaking, gambling, staying busy, affairs, chaos, shopping, planning, perfectionism, constant change and the Internet”
In 2010 I followed Gretchen Rubin’s “The Happiness Project” I spent a year following her suggestions for boosting energy, remembering love, aiming higher. One of my favorite quotes Rubin uses in her book is by W. H. Auden who says
　
“ Between the ages of twenty and forty we are engaged in the process of discovering who we are, which involves learning the difference between accidental limitations which it is our duty to outgrow and the necessary limitations of our nature beyond which we cannot trespass with impunity.” We should push ourselves without fear of failure. Challenge can actually bring us happiness. Once the mind wraps itself around an idea it can never go back. We can take the bumps and move on faster when we know our natural limitations.

When we work with the horses at the barn our main goal as horseman is to decrease the amount of cues that it requires for us to make a correction to bad or unwanted behavior. A horse eats from the ground with the bit in his mouth a gentle tug up on reins redirects his attention back to you. We are fortunate when we witness a horses brain turning on and the relaxation that follows of having purpose.

My riding receives instant correction. If I am doing the wrong thing the wrong muscles will hurt as a result.
If I overcorrect my position I am thrown into the saddle horn as a reminder of how far forward I am.
I sometimes imagine that God works that way when we get off our path. When we keep trying to make something work that clearly isn’t working for us and we refuse to move on. He gives us a quick bump to nudge us back on path. To let go and move forward is something we tend to not do when it comes to what will people think if I quit that job, if I take that risk, if I speak up and say what I‘m thinking? If you notice the further you are off your path, the more correction you will receive.
We have to accept that we are imperfect, that there are some things we just are not going to be able to do, we must learn to move on without the guilt that causes us to take a step back. We have to take our personal boundaries back and regain some self respect too. Loving ourselves to accept that we are enough. Make the wrong thing difficult and the right thing easy.
　
We have to spend less time engaged with Facebook and more time face to face with our family. And until we learn to turn the cell phone off , switch off the computer we won’t truly be able to stay organized for long. We don’t limit our distractions. It’s truly about being in balance.

-"Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards." - former Major League baseball pitcher Vernon Law

I can come in and organize your belongings into neat and tidy containers coordinated in matching patterns and colors but unless you change your perception of balance you won’t stay that way past a year.
On the other hand you might be like me, u get organized, and find that you have more time to hear your calling more clearly. Getting caught up in the opportunities, forgetting maintenance is required to keep it all going.

When Im on my game, keeping my life in balance, moving through my house like an assembly line of stations
for getting to and from our day to day routine…I feel good. The better I feel the more aware I am of my environment. I sleep better, I ride better, I want to ride more, I forget less and Im more present with my family, I relate better with my husband and kids.
When I allow others to force me into “yes I can” instead of “no I’m sorry I can’t this week, but thanks for asking” I put all my priorities aside. Pretty soon, my family is angry because I haven’t cooked dinner and we’ve had take -out or sandwiches for the last 4 nites, the laundry backs up, I forget to vacuum and pretty soon the house needs an overhaul. I’ve learned that that is man’s natural state of correction. When we eat too much, we gain weight. When we hyper focus on time busters, our surroundings suffer because we can’t manage to efficiently get it all done in the same 24 hours we had before we overcommited.
　
Today, we have so many gadgets and sources of information coming at us at high speed. We still can’t process that information any faster than we could 100 years ago. Our brains still work at the same speed. Our blackberrys and mom agendas can only take so much before they bust at the seems.
After a recent flip out at a children’s council meeting I determined that there are just some commitments I cannot honor. If it goes against my natural abilities then I’ve gotta give it up. When everyone else is a “top-down” kind of visionary and Im the only “bottom-up” planner it’s no good for me. Most of us in this room are probably Type-A personalities and let’s just say we are in high demand. That’s a lot of pressure to keep it all together!
I use to let clients totally dictate my time, morning and night. I’ve spent many a bedtime dreading the morning because I just knew there was going to be some email ready to ruin my day in there lurking.
Tile wasn’t coming in, fabric damaged in shipping. And at 36 yrs old I’ve just learned some valuable lessons these last 5 years that have transformed how I feel about my path. I have realized nothing is permanent and we are meant to grow.

Paulo Coelho, author of the Alchemist -"Changes only happen when we go against everything we're used to doing"　
While believing there was a possibility that I might have breast cancer due to suspicious cells that had to be removed last summer and having some "Real Housewife of Walker County-hot mess" sue me because its gonna take an extra week to hang up her Louis Vutton luggage collection …I realized what was important. I just didn’t know I was only at the beginning of my “correction” cues.
　
I had in our recent move taken on too much again. See, here in Montgomery I managed up to 5 professional organizers on various jobs and after two years of moving to Jasper was still traveling across the state for work. I easily made the newspaper and local television stations again, picking up a bi- weekly radio appearance on a local radio station. I was the “go-to” person for planning and an excellent source of information. But it had all happened to quick really.
And just when I thought I had made the right decisions and knew what pulling back meant I received one last correction that would truly humble my spirit. My husband and I lost our third pregnancy in our first trimester earlier this year. I had told everyone, had even published on my blog that we were trying. I had planned everything down to the help I would sub contract out during my maternity leave!
　
But truthfully, I had really become quite complacent and was looking forward to the break.

Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there!
-Roy Rogers
　
In my 8th week of pregnancy, with low progesterone levels, a snow storm hit and I began losing my baby. My husband was in Atlanta, my friend and her family moved in and took care of me and my children for three days and I’ve taken myself off the radar ever since. What I learned from that experience was that Lula will never give me peace, she was a stepping stone. If she’s working she’s stressing. The business served it’s purpose to allow me to stay home while my children were small. Both are in school now and our situation has changed entirely. My business is named for my late grandmother and somehow I always thought I’d have to stay in operation forever because I couldn’t dishonor her namesake.

I love working on a therapeutic horse farm. I love my students, I love the planning, I love riding, I love being at a barn all day. I can organize volunteer information, I can plan fundraisers, I can host large field trips through our barn doors discussing our program.
I love the flexibility it offers, but I almost would have never offered to make the transition had I not been planning to take time off after a fall delivery.
Following our loss in January, I took some time off and was out feeding while it was still cold. Alone in the mornings with the horses I felt a peace. I was alone, but not thinking about what had just happened. Not trying to reason with the disappointment, it was nice to be still of mind. I stayed busy with the work of caring for 9 horses. Those horses and my students fully recharge my spirit and I feel that that is where I need to be right now in my career.

From the time I discussed accepting a promotion to Executive Assistant and taking the riding program on full time to the time my Lulagrace door sign fell off it had been two weeks. Literally, fell off my car door on I65, never once in 5 years have they fallen off!
I feel that all my experiences and talents have lead me to this point. I am perfectly fine to not deal with competition or staying ahead of the curve. I’m fine with going back underground and not being “on” all the time. It is hard to separate your personal life when your business life is on mainsteet. It can be unhealthy to be a brand. Most importantly I’ve learned how to just “be Melissa”. I recognize when something causes me discomfort and I’ve learned to trust my intuition more often. I’ve learned to let go of uncertainty and think I know what it means to dig deep. I‘ve realized that when we are living in our full joy we move more freely throughout our life. We have to give up control of those reins but it takes great courage. It’s hard to tell people No! But it’s necessary.

“Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.”
Raymond Lindquist
Today, I attempt to live a grateful life. I listen more closely to the universal cues of life’s ebbs and flows trying to be more in tune with my spirits inner current. I feel very plugged in to where I’m suppose to be. As Max Lucado says in the Cure for the ommon Life…I can live in my sweetspot.
I truly feel that the work I’m doing now is meaningful and worthy. But it took all of the experiences of walking through those baby steps, developing patience with my clients to achieve living their best life, to see that there is truly a pattern to success and happiness. Don’t’ plan! The less I plan the more favor I receive. I trust more and it works out!
We all have baggage and unresolved issues that influence how we behave. Sometimes they hold us back from living a truly authentic life. But we put these limitations on ourselves.
While trying to lesson the amount of correctional cues I get to stay on my path, I’ve learned to let go of the unnecessary to listen to the necessary directions for living MY best life.
I hope that you have learned during our time together a few basic concepts I feel are essential to living an organized life…
Learn to say no
Establish clear priorities in your life
Accept the challenges
Make time for maintenance
Release and move forward
Celebrate imperfection
Know that you are enough
Also know when to move on
Take correction
and
Try to live a joy filled life …Uncontained!

Hiatus!

2011-03-14T08:22:00.000-07:00

We are under construction! Since we last spoke many things have changed. I will begin the blog again in April. Over the next few weeks I am going to publish my speech made last week to The Professional Women in Building. I used that time to wrap up my experience in professional organizing, running a business and making time for me. I believe it will post in about 4 parts.
I feel very strongly about what I put together and would like to share with you also. Since my husband and I experienced our miscarriage in January many opportunities have come since. I am so proud to now be our NARHA State Chairperson serving 2011-2012. I was also offered a full time position with the therapeutic riding center I was instructing at as assistant to the executive director. I will share more about this experience when I return in April, the feelings I processed and where I felt God was calling me.

The blog/s, Facebook and Twitter pages will all stay up and running but Lula is officially not accepting clients at this time. I would like to spend my time observing and writing on things that interest me. Of course I will still focus on my journey, ways to live with less anxiety (as I am a recovering anxiety addict), technology & gadgets that makes our lives easier and how we can run our homes more efficiently. I will be sharing lots of what I have learned helping my clients along with my own profound moments of how to live my best life!!

Hope you will stay with me and see where this goes! I am excited about this new chapter and can't wait to share it with you!!

2011-03-13T14:17:00.001-07:00

Everything that has a beginning has an ending. Make your peace with that & all will be well. - Buddha

Working Around the Page

2011-01-25T19:32:00.000-08:00

I have left the blog for a few weeks but am slowly returning back to myself. In the last two weeks much has happened. I find myself sitting tonite working at the computer for the 4th hour and realizing Im doing it again. Im taking on more and more and more and more and more...you get it!

But in life I am learning how to balance what I love. Balance what works. Balance what pays. I recently attended a clinic for horse training and our instructor, Mr. Craig Cameron, was filled with wise sayings.

Two of them being...
" Make the wrong thing hard and the right thing easy"

"The secret to success is to find something you would do for free and find someone to pay you to do it"

I really took these sayings to heart. After our recent loss I realized I can plan nothing in my life for I do not steer this ship. Some opportunities to follow my passion have occurred and I have seized them. I am only going where I am lead to go at this point. God is showing me that the wrong thing is hard and the right thing is easy.

In college, during one of my first drawing classes, I was told that I did well at working around the page. I sit here tonight working on two email accounts, a blog, 3 facebook pages, two discussion boards, two committees, and a twitter feed, simultaneously.

I have spent the last 4 days around horses and horse people and have determined a kind of bluntness comes with the territory. Balance is not always the easiest thing to do but in order to keep moving forward it is necessary.
Will I try to manage it all? Or will I listen to His plans for me and follow His lead?

All I can say is if you needed Lula in the next 4 months....you just missed her!

Time to Heal - We'll be back

2011-01-14T07:39:00.000-08:00

Lula's blog will be back in a few weeks. Melissa is not accepting any appointments until Jan. 20th. We are dealing with some difficult circumstances and using this time for healing as a family. We would appreciate your kind words and of course ask that you keep us in your prayers as we know only time will heal all wounds. Thank you for supporting Lulagrace.

For just those few weeks
I had you to myself.
And that seems too short a time
to be changed so profoundly.
In those few weeks,
I came to know you...
and to love you.
You came to trust me with your life.
Oh what a life I had planned for you!
Just those few weeks...
when I lost you,
i lost a lifetime of hopes,
plans, dreams and aspirations.
A slice of my future simply vanished overnight.
Just those few weeks...
It wasn't enough time to convince others
how special and important you were.
How odd, a truly unique person has recently died
and no one is mourning the passing.
Just a mere few weeks..
And no "normal" person would cry all night
Over a tiny unfinished baby,
or get depressed and withdraw day after endless day.
No one would, so why am I??
You were just those few weeks, my little one.
You darted in and out of my life too quickly.
But it seems that's all the time you needed
to make my life richer
and to give me a small glimpse of eternity.
~S. Erling

Reflection!

2010-12-31T17:02:00.001-08:00

Every day I read... a lot! From all your posts to multiple blogs and lots of articles published referencing anything from A-Z. Today, it seems we all have a common thread running through out our lives. We are all collectively ready to put this year behind us.
All of us on some level have dealt with unpleasantness and pain, things dealt in our hand that were a bunch of no fun.
It is nice to see such optimism. Feeling everyone's hope for a better year is such a refreshing feeling. Knowing that we are ready to put the past behind us and move on without looking back. I think we can all agree some tough lessons were learned for sure. In the same breath we must also praise our ability to cope with our emotions as well as the courage we all posess to tell our story. The bravest thing we can do is share our strife with others. We certainly help to inspire each other with our stories of triumph. For those personal struggles of mine this year I am thankful for what they have brought me. A greater understanding of what true faith is all about. I have never felt more in touch with my priorities than I do right now at this moment. There is strength in my convictions like never before. I am truly excited to see what God has in store for me next and I leave it completely up to Him.
As we spend our last few hours of reflection, let's toast those hardships for leaving a burn in our belly to continue moving forward, Happy New Year!

diggin in for 2011!

2010-12-30T14:35:00.000-08:00

One of the perks of my career is seeing what happens on the other side of pushing through. I usually start with a client who is in despair, feeling very cautious about what to expect and by the end of a few days that person is more confident and at ease about letting go and living in the moment.

Something I have always tried to do for my clients is to witness their collection of desires. Recognizing what they have collected and its pattern along with listening to what they value most. Often, I can realize a hidden passion or a longing to pursue a dream. Just like I can tell after organizing a closet what colors you like or not. A lot of folks don't really like to wear yellow I have found.

By organizing my clients and often times realizing those dreams I am able to discuss options for taking their first steps into a new business. Sometimes they may not have even thought of connecting the dots but mostly I find they are stuck with the how-to part.

Every year I teach several components to the students in AUM's Interior Decorating program, one of them being client communications. Fortunately I have worked with many advertising agencies and planned annual marketing schedules for automotive dealers as well as real estate agencies. Planning your campaign is the most important thing you can do for your business.

With my clients I am able to discuss objectives and establish goals along with time frames to achieve these things. They are left with new motivation along with new tools to begin these ventures. In the recent How-To guides that were popular with last month's package it occurred to me, it's nice to have a map!

I have established someones home office and set them up to create and market on more than one occasion and happy to say my most recent success was a dear friend that I knew wanted to be more creative in her life. I clearly understand the importance of social media and online tools as I network with professional organizers from across the country and stay up to date on what's working and what is not.

A lot of times you have everything you need, just not sure where you should start. Sometimes we can even sabotage our own desires by repeating behavior patterns that are not productive. We are so overwhelmed by ideas and plans that we short circuit in the getting-around-to-it phase.

Having been a business owner for the last seven years I have tried a lot of things and love sharing my successes and failures with others. The number one reward for me is helping someone figure out their mission statement in life. What is even better is when I can prevent someone from making a two steps back mistake.

I feel truly blessed to have been able to pursue my goals and I am excited to venture into new territory this year with my art and providing more coaching and consulting with my services. Lula's not going to be doing very much physical work, it will be limited.

Working in media advertising for several years I was able to benefit from top selling techniques from Gannett Corp., parent company of USA Today. I have relied on this training in my own business along with the tools we use to teach Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University and happy to share that motivation with others. I have decided to put all my passions together and create a small business consultation service along side the organizational aspect.

At the same time I realize I am in no way done with my own growth and discovery. By counseling others I am able to provide myself constant encouragement from the bravery I see. People helping people is what it's all about! Creating a sense of community is essential to a small business.

So, if you have that idea, something nagging at you after all the lists are done for the day...but just not sure how to take the first step, take advantage of our January small business package. Receive coaching from me along with organizational tips for setting up and running your home based business ( a $500 value ) the entire month of January for $150.

Receive a complete two hour consultation along with follow up for 3 months to ensure you hit your goals for $300.
For those of you that desire a personal home organization consultation, Lula will continue December's package of a 90 min-two hour consultation plus "how-to" guide for $100.

For questions you may contact me at melissa@lulagrace.com or 334-799-4598. Thank you to all the great folks who supported Lula in 2010, it was a great year, but lessons learned for sure! Happy to say 2011 looks like it is going to start with a bang, so call today to book your appointment!! Wishing you much success in the New Year!!!!!!!!

**Small business package available state wide, personal organization package limited to Walker County residents only.

CONTEST!!!!

2010-12-28T07:43:00.000-08:00

Refer the most friends to our Facebook page :

http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/pages/Lulagrace-Organized-Interiors/123242845254

and enter to win this "Lead Without Limits" water bottle from Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University!!

Help us get to 500 Likes....refer the most friends to our page by Jan. 5th, make sure they enter your name on our wall to register you for the free drawing!!

being emotionally healthy and Merry Christmas!

2010-12-17T11:21:00.000-08:00

Reading a few Katherine Center quotes this week I felt overwhelmed with heartache. Sometimes her words are so deep that they take me by surprise. You realize feelings that were there but not verbalized yet. She beats you to
profound self realizations.

Its a good thing because you get there quicker. I have discovered many writers, bloggers and other folks of inspiration this year that have really helped me make sense of my "self". Not that I'm so challenged in knowing who I am, but just making sense of me and why I'm here. I feel sometimes like I have lived with a broken heart for a long time. Over what ...I couldn't say in particular. Just events throughout my life and childhood that steered me one way or another. Regret over mistakes, opportunities I've blown because I'm stubborn. Basically, whenever I have not listened to Him and His plan for me.
And heartache as a topic has always intrigued me. When I am listening to Ryan Adams (my 2nd husband) Bayne claims something must be wrong with me, why am I listening to such sad music if I'm fine. Soulful lyrics are so beautiful to me, much like a great painting or a beautiful landscape. There is beauty in the molding of a human spirit. And I can just relate to melancholy sometimes better. I 've even researched it a little. I think it is because I know I better get prepared for it and I intensely want to prevent myself from falling apart when it comes. After all, I am an easy crier!!
Come to find out if you bing "Living with Heartache" you quickly discover you have simply nothing on other people. Somewhere there is always someone else in the throws of losing a child, a spouse, a parent, even a pet. I am preparing for that very thing in my life and I want to be strong. My father has been some form of ill since I was 10. As I ponder having a baby after 35, just like my mother did, will I be creating a child surely to lose a parent in their prime as I will. How can you expect someone to grieve your loss while they are still trying to figure out who they are. So often I think, will my Dad be here when Baylor graduates in another 10 years?
Next December will be the 20th anniversary of my sweet Grandmother Lula's passing. I lost both of my grandparents the same year before I graduated. How are my boys going to feel about losing possibly both of them before they graduate?

(my Dad this summer with great-niece Isabella)

I would feel that I was exaggerating but I get messages from home that all is not well. It has been the case for several years. But he has had a horrible tumble since I saw him last and hear it wasn't pretty. Now words like fragile, feeble, weak are part of the vocabulary, so it isn't what I want it to be, but it's quite possibly "time". My mother also hasn't recovered from a fall 3 yrs ago leaving her unable to walk.
As I prepare to make a trip home tomorrow it is overwhelming to think that maybe I don't want to go at all. Do I want to go home and see what kind of shape they are in? Certainly not. I feel I have worked so hard at becoming emotionally healthy since my young adulthood that surely I can buck up and go home. But its sensitive to me and frankly speaking I'm a little afraid. Its my parents. I have a 5 year old! How do you say "Soak Poppy up boys, he could be gone in a flash!"

On the immediate home front I have this Maltese, Luckie, who is aging rapidly and has recently dropped a lot of weight. I have called finally after my husband has urged me to make some sort of decision soon. Its $45 to have him put to sleep. A final no return home from the vet's office. As I look at him now he is quite sad, but the UPS guy still sends him into a frenzy and he displays the gusto of a 3 year old puppy. He is definitely a grouch, a lot like my sweet Daddy. I compare Luckie to Poppy quite often actually. I will make the decision soon...its Christmas after all. I look at lil Luckie now and think I can't imagine placing a $45 price tag on his life. But I hate to see him suffer just like I will hate to see my Daddy suffer. No easy answer...heartache's set a bead on me.

For this Christmas, I am going to show them both and all my family all the love I can...I'm fast trying to get myself to a point of being emotionally able to process their loss. I haven't been able to fathom it to this point. I am thankful I have had this year of self reflection to learn to appreciate my now and the most important lesson that "perfectionism" is not necessarily a good trait to have. Things are going to fall apart. Prepare for it.
As I peak at my Christmas gift to myself that has just arrived, Ordinary Courage by Dr. Brene Brown, I am filled with optimism again. First sentence in preface...
"Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do."
As I close this year I commit to making 2011 my bravest year yet, whatever may come!!
Thank you for following Lula's Grace, I love to read your comments, keep them coming!!!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!

New Beginnings!

2010-12-14T06:12:00.000-08:00

When I was in junior high school there was nothing I wanted more than to be accepted into Carver Creative Performing Arts Center or CCPAC. I applied, was accepted and began my 10th grade year feeling like an artist at the FAME school!
It was probably the greatest opportunity of my life. I entered competition, had excellent accomplished instructors, met other young folks like myself and was encouraged to apply to art colleges in the southeast. I did, I applied at Savannah College of Art and Design, Memphis College of Art and ofcourse the local college. My folks decided I was not to attend an out of state school so I went to the local college and majored in graphic arts.

I hated it. Quite literally...it sucked me dry of inspiration. I longed to be in an environment that thrived on art and culture. So I quit. Decided that was obviously not my path. I eventually got a degree in liberal arts after 8 years. I like to say I am a mile wide and an inch deep. I know a little something about lots of different stuff...like the fall of technology in the Soviet Union and can discuss in depth 5 Shakespearean plays as I took a Shakespeare in Production class, loved it!

It has taken me nearly 20 years to decide I want to be involved with art again. I picked up a brush when my oldest was born and painted something for his room but it still has taken 8 years to bring that to the surface. I'm ready now. I also feel I have so much inside me that visually needs to come out.

I think the most crucial decision in my life was when I took the attitude I was not good enough to go to one of those awesome schools so why try? I have spent so much of this year reflecting and trying to decide what type of "adult" I want to be in a few years when I turn 40.

So we are gonna try and get back to it...I'll keep you posted what is to come. Gonna attempt to paint up some Christmas gifts for my sisters and mother. Who knows what will happen when I break out a piece of canvas again!

Interesting to see when you trace the steps in which you came you can usually find your own answers.

Ponderings of 2010, next week last blog of year!

2010-12-12T13:11:00.000-08:00

This is the last working week for me of 2010. Kids get outta school on Friday and I am done til Jan. 5th 2011. It is so nice to take a long break, visit family, but mostly take time for reflecting and make plans for 2011. This was again, a Christmas that snuck up on me. Not even sure I will be able to commit myself to getting out Christmas cards. I felt incredibly inadequate at the raising of the gingerbread houses last Friday and have let the week's adventures leave my brain like mush. I simply am not sure if I can process any-thing else. We have committed to less this year, tried to make family first, stay within our lil budget plan and make good decisions during the holidays, but the weariness of another year coming to an end can wreak a little havoc on emotions.

"The Happiness Project" has been difficult to do this month, it is committing to ALL the work you've been doing all this year every day of the month. I am looking onward next year to a new reading list. Confident in what I have learned these last 12 months from Mrs. Rubin.

First is one of my favorite new bloggers and artists Kelly Rae Roberts Taking Flight: Inspiration And Techniques To Give Your Creative Spirit Wings and to be followed by Dr. Brene Brown's The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are .

While I am working on the last blog post of the year, I seem to keep hitting on a few themes: living with integrity; living with more creativity; seek new inspiration; appreciate what I have; spend more quality time with my family; and to be more spirit led.

Next weekend I head home to S. Alabama for the first time since school started. Very Sad! I have never been that long without seeing my family. Homesick? My favorite line in Kings of Leon's song Radioactive...
"It's in the water...
It's in the story
It's where you came from
The sons and daughters
In all their glory
It's gonna shape them
And when they clash
And come together
And start rising
Just drink the water
Where you came from...
Where you came from"

Feels good to go home, feels better to love being in your own home, Next year's theme I can go ahead and say will have lots to do with "home"! Hope you will continue to follow us through the next transition of our lives. I mean, people, there could be chickens, raised gardens, and even a new baby.

Lulagrace Organized Interiors, may be experiencing some changes. Things to be modified in life to allow new things to continue to come in it. I may do mostly consulting, haven't made a full commitment. Those who need me usually find me with little assistance. As I have done this now for a minute, I think it is fair to dedicate more time to my family, my nest, applying all that Ive learned from the amazing clients I have had over the last 6 years. Not necessarily saying I am no longer organizing/decorating, just only for a few that I feel called to work for. There are some that can't be helped, they don't really want it. It is rude to say" You know you could be prospering by now, but you keep hanging on to all this stuff" so politeness leads you to decline.

My biggest lesson this year, crazy is not a goal of mine, "looking perfect does not perfection make". Perfection is also not an attribute of good character...merely a symptom of fear. I feel empowered to have this inside knowledge that I still see so many run around frazzled thinking that it is going to pan out well for them...I was scared my problem with perfectionism was going to lead me to a heart attack. So I am really trying to chill it on down now. My new mantra to the women I meet..."SLOW DOWN!"

So until next week's post....I'm off to ponder!

Finishing my "Happiness Project"- Self reflection

2010-12-01T15:44:00.000-08:00

This month I will be reflecting on an entire year of transformation. I have turned my thoughts towards the new year and have a gut feeling that 2011 will be my best yet!

Having gone through what I've gone through this year I feel a complete shift in my DNA. A change of heart about having a third child, turns out I do! A change in how and who I intend to do business with in this new small town I've been thrust upon. How far Im willing to travel to work. My health...oh thats a big one too! God and my family come first. And while I've been sacrificing them for far too long to help those that call on me I have worked all year on finding balance.

My parents have aged considerably this year...all while I've relocated 3 hours north to them. I haven't been present with my first family in quite a while. I intend to be more "present" with them in the new year. It really has been difficult being away from home for the first time ever and with my dad soon turning 80 I need to get with that!

My husband and I are changing and settling into our mature selves these days. Our boys are bigger we are able to experience so much more now as a family. Life is so good, but I feel I haven't appreciated it up until this point.

I've been following Gretchen Rubin's "The Happiness Project" all year. Excited it will soon be a real tv show with "Charlotte" from SNCity series as Gretchen herself. I tried to even get my methodist women's circle to follow it as well, however, I was the only one who stuck it through and boy am I glad I did.

I have reflected on it so much throughout the year that I feel it is somewhat a bible or guide to help me in life to be the better wife, mom, sister, friend, etc.

This is my last month, sad but true, and this month's resolution is to follow the way of perfection acting with greater love. By learning to do the loving thing, to learn to be grateful, practice humility, listen and laugh, don't top, forget scorecards, no calculation, loving thoughts actions and words, putting aside anger and resentment...and most of all be happy. Tall order!!! But she hasn't let me down so far and I've changed a lot of my inner nature and discovered quite a lot about myself these last 11 months.

My long time clients, the ones I have built a true relationship with and feel concern in their well being I have realized I keep telling them the same thing Im trying to tell myself.
SLOW DOWN!!!! Stop driving yourself in the ground!!! For WHAT!!!!! I 've taken the whole year to work on just that and feel Im coming to the peak of a wonderful discovery.

I have decided that if I am going to anticipate pregnancy next year, continue working with the horsefarm and painting furniture with my best friend I will surely make changes to fit all those things into my life. By subtracting those things that don't bring me complete joy...like sifting through some strangers belongings and getting into the nasty stuff that caused me a staph infection years ago (my Hoarders Anonymous clients) and bringing my body down over and over again to marathon organize at the same time I feel the desire to say YES to everything I'm asked to do...Im going to stick with what I said earlier in the year. No more! I will organize for a select few who truly need me, consult for everyone else and as the new year rolls around I have decided to offer productivity coaching as one of my services. As this has been something I have already done for years as a professional organizer and time management coach I only seek to help folks help themselves. I would love everyone I come in contact with to the know more joy with less stress, God's love and forgiveness and the comfort in their heart that they are enough. I have been encouraged by others who know me well and feel this is something I want to pursue. Not a life coach but a "get back on track" coach.
As I said 2011 is going to be a great year, I know it because He has planned it for me and I gave Him the reins earlier in the summer and that's that!

For more information on The Happiness Project
visit http://www.happiness-project.com/

New Organizing Show on Style!

2010-11-19T05:45:00.000-08:00

Most of you are familiar that during the week I was promoting a friend and fellow professional organizer here locally in the Birmingham area named Amanda LeBlanc. Her company, The Amanda's, self-titled 30 min reality show special just aired last night and I am so exciting to see what is next for her.

In the spirit of Jeff Lewis, Amanda tackles everything with precision and nothing less than perfection. Her attention to detail and ability to assemble a team that mirrors her expectations does her great service.

I think that in the history of "organizing" shows it has been very obvious that the entire segment was masterfully produced and the "professionals" are actors. I have had to do a double take when I've seen them in a commercial or hosting another show.

The Go -to Guy from Clean House, a comedian. Both Trish and Neicy, actors. I miss Linda Cooper- Smith, she was authentic for sure. But one thing was clear, it was not necessarily all reality done in a 36 hour period. Weeks and weeks of planning go into each and every show.

The Amandas is a more accurate portrayal of what we professional organizers do. We enter each consultation with no idea what we are walking into. In every situation there is going to be something unexpected that takes place throwing you off your original plan of action. It is a professional organizers responsibility to manage the project from beginning to end. There is no getting exhausted and quitting til its more convenient. It has to be done. In order to manage an extensive team of support, organizers have to be optimum time managers. Some folks may take Amanda's approach at dealing with her staff a tad too rigid. But it is that exact quality that makes her team a success.

As an individual organizer who has had assistants from time to time but never a full time staff, I in no way represent that I could manage a "staff" of support. So hats of to her for that feat alone. When we lived in Montgomery I taught at a local college a class on interior decorating that gave me an intern for one week each session. I would plan my "messy room contests" around when I would have my interns each year. Subbing out work to other organizers can be even more difficult because you are managing someone who has no loyalty to your business.

I am most proud of Amanda and her team of professionals. She is what I consider "Big Time" and certainly one of the prettiest organizers across the country. Some folks just really work well on the small screen and I believe it does suit her. When you do what you love your enthusiasm shows through. Having been a person who has had much and lost much I tend to forget at times that she really has experienced the "ultimate purge" as she said in her show.
Losing everything, literally everything, in Hurricane Katrina little more than 5 yrs ago now. How can you not listen to her discuss her desire to help folks with their unhealthy attachments to "stuff" and not take it to heart.

I'm behind her 100% of the way! I am happy to see the real organizers stepping up and getting the spotlight. Those like myself that do it because we were born to do it, not just because it's the newest trend, some new get rich quick scheme, or someone who just wants a "side job". I look forward to seeing more and if you would too let the Style Network know it! If you missed it I have included a link below to go to clips of the show.

http://www.mystyle.com/mystyle/videos/v91519_the-amandas-ultimate-purge.html

Don't miss it!!!!

2010-11-16T14:22:00.000-08:00

There are folks that are just made for TV and my friend and fellow professional organizer, amanda LeBlanc, is one of them!! please don't miss her reality special premiering tomorrow night on E's Style Network!!! If you like the show....let Style! Know!!

Local Company to have 30 minute Reality Special on the Style Network

Birmingham's own, The Amandas Professional Organizing, will be featured in a 30 minute reality show special on The Style Network November 17^th at 11pm/10pm ct.

The special will follow owner and organizer extraordinaire Amanda LeBlanc and her team of organizers as they transform the life of one lucky family.

For interviews please contact:

Dustin Canez 205.970.1087 or

Amanda LeBlanc 504.234.7197

Meet Amanda LeBlanc

Amanda is a certified professional organizer with the skill and passion to help people across the United States get organized. Amanda set out in 2003 to help people achieve their goal of organization and she has been raising the bar ever since. She is a member of the National Association of Professional Organizers. As a member of NAPO, Amanda serves on the Education Committee as Task Team Manager, the Associate Committee as well as serving as a chair of NAPO’s Strategic Task Force. She is also a member of the National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization Toastmasters International, and the Vestavia Hills Chamber of Commerce where she currently serves as an ambassador. Amanda is active in the community donating material and time for Habitat for Humanity and the Birmingham Junior League Bargain Carousel.

Amanda’s team of organizers, affectionately known as The Amandas, have 25 years combined experience organizing homes across the Southeast and the Czech Republic. The Amandas appear regularly on morning shows in both Birmingham and New Orleans giving tips and suggestions to viewers. The Amandas have been featured on HGTV.com, Birmingham Home and Garden, Birmingham Magazine, Women’s World, as well as many other regional and national publications.

Amanda, her husband Dr. Dan LeBlanc, and their children currently live in Birmingham, Alabama.

Victory and Privacy

2010-11-09T16:47:00.000-08:00

My husband and I have been at odds lately over my content. My recent blog when I asked my husband his first thoughts he said, "It's good but not your best". I sensed a little frustration and after he preceded to break down two beds and swap their rooms I discovered why. I know I'm hard to live with, I fully expect that so urge him to express himself but this....let's just say I wasn't prepared. But I thought about it, I was gonna figure it out on my own.

Having been a blogger for the past 4 years with http://www.onlineorganizing.com/ I had always focused every piece on organization. As a new "stay -at- home/work-from-home" mompreneur I was sharing what I was learning. I shared all my time savings tricks and tips from my kickin it old school 50's housewife mother Betty. And a few tried and true practices by Grandmother Lula herself. Not only did I want to be a great advice giver of efficiency I also desired to balance burning my candles at both ends. Why could'nt I do it all!?!

In June of this year, for the very first time, I shared personal pieces over the breast biopsy they had attempted two times and the surgery that followed. That was a life changing experience for me. My husband was fine about the full disclosure and felt it therapeutic for me to do so. We have moved to a small town and my writing has become very mainstreet. How much do we share about our own lives. As it turned out I decided to share everything about that experience because I felt if it had been cancer I would want to document this all for some future reference. Okay, no cancer, praise Jesus, life goes on to normal. But I put a lot of stuff out there...and it felt freeing and warm. I released it. Like pieces of paper burned and tossed in the sea. Think there was a movie I watched in International Film Study at AUM that had that very scene. Marlon Brando and something about Tea.
Anyway, writing my thoughts allowed me to quickly process, decide a plan of action about how I'm going to deal with that feeling and then poof! Let it go.
So now we've moved on to talking about wanting a new baby. Now my husband isn't sure he wants me to put that out there. I must love and respect his wishes and I understand there should be some sense of privacy. My first reaction says okay no more baby talk "on-air" until there is one. But now I've been diagnosed with MRSA staph and well that's gonna change some things in my life, like... I'm thinking of going vegan. This blog is about making sense of my life and my business (aren't they really the same thing?).
I have to mention I'm also sensitive because I watched Zenyatta lose a 19 time winning streak and get beat by a nostril and a boy in the Breeder's Cup. No matter what she still goes down as the fastest filly of all time! Lots of expectations to perform placed on that horse. Never in history had their been a crowd of over 100,000 cheering fans and flashbulbs. Doesn't make her any less of a winner that she lost, she has talent.
So, while riding this big palomino today that has a kind heart and an old soul...we walked, and I thought, and here's what I got....

I'm gonna talk about wanting a baby; because I want one

I'm gonna talk about living with MRSA; because I live with MRSA

I'm gonna talk about being more organized; because I want to be

I'm gonna share my life; so I can testify to the glory of God

But I will only speak VICTORY over any of it!!!!

Actually, I can't take the credit for that last one...that was my husband's request after speaking to him about it. He hasn't minded the open window to our life just praise it and speak triumph over whatever the case may be. And I intend to honor it!!

Don't forget to Fall Back!

2010-11-07T06:45:00.000-08:00

As we wake this morning to sunshine instead of darkness I feel anticipation like never before. I have been absent a little lately from writing because I have not had a direction that felt right. I have written a few blogs, some were a little angry because I was at the time, some too personal, some made no sense at all. So I have tossed the last three and am turning the page. One thing about living in a small town, you run into your blog readers at Wal-mart or carpool quite often.You know the people in your community. You go to church with them. It has been a little difficult lately to write freely. To see so many contradictions in my surroundings, to witness behaviors that I would love to talk about in my blog but would reveal some one's story if I did. This blog is published in several different places weekly. Being able to talk to anonymous folks in the blogosphere is therapeutic but quite another story to put your business or your friend's on main street in Smallville, USA. I miss my anonymity.
I say all that to encourage myself to publish this blog which is going to be extremely personal to me. To take the risk and put my life out there as testimony.

I live with staph, I contracted it from a clients home many years ago and have battled it ever since. I wrote a 2 page blog a few weeks ago with the intention of getting that off my chest then. I manage my outbreaks, I try and take all the proper precautions to lower my exposure. I hate having it and would really just love to hold up in my house until it's gone but can't do that. After the surgery in June I had several infections and it took over a month to get past. Then after starting work back around the barn I had one come up on my thigh the end of August. It has left a scar. When an active infection hits I take care of it properly and get back on meds but they can sometimes make you feel weak and you tend to end up in the bed anyway. My energy gets zapped and I get all achy. Kinda like having the flu. Then there is the pain of the infection itself. Not to mention how it makes me feel around other people. I worry about how they will treat me, after all it's gross to me too.
This past Friday I had a small cyst I had developed a few years ago removed from my scalp and as precaution we decided on a round of antibiotics to keep me going strong. In this discussion of what to prescribe this time I found out the last culture from the wound on my thigh had come back MRSA. Hmmmm...first time I've ever been told that...always thought it was regular staph. Maybe it had been until just recently.
We want a baby, soon....MRSA always says "deadly" when you google it...and words like infant abnormalities...cesarean...all these words are popping up when I search "MRSA in pregnancy". But then other articles talk about all the advances in the medicines to treat it while pregnant. So we have to get ourselves educated for sure.
I am going to immerse myself in getting my immune system amped up. I'm going to talk to my doctor and do my research. I have been preaching for the last year that I am going to lower my stress, quit taking on so much, space out my work so I don't over do it. Decreasing stress decreases outbreaks. I need a happy healthy functioning immune system. I have been "talking" for months about just consulting from here on out with Lula.To volunteer less help. But we all know I have struggled with that and haven't gained much ground. I am likely going to be making major changes this January concerning how I run my business. Its time to stop "talking" about making the change and DO IT!
Sometimes we have these great ambitions, these strong desires only to come up short with disappointment. I'm disappointed for sure that I can't live how I want when I want, but I have a strong foundation of family and friends to fall back on who will keep me well advised. We'll get through it and if a baby is in our future then I know God is watching over us and I have complete faith in His plan.

It takes Patience!

2010-10-22T19:33:00.000-07:00

We are just coming off a 4 day camping trip to a bluegrass festival communing with thousands of strangers. Our first vacation without children in 5 years, we were cut off from communicating via laptop or cell phone due to lack of service. So off we went to have fun and create new bonds with new friends. It is rare to find a couple you get along with much less two other people that you could stand for 4 days of primitive camping with 5000 other folks, 7 1/2 hours away. It was a first for us but worthwhile for sure.
While sitting at the tent after sending our younger whipper-snapper friends out for the evening (because I can't stay out past midnite anymore or I turn into a pumpkin) we could sit back and talk. My husband took this opportunity to express some concerns. We want to have a new baby but I am unable to say no to anything that crosses my path. He fears the stress it will put on me if I stay at the pace I've been traveling at for the past few years. I think we both know it is because I fear I will miss an opportunity. To do what I never know, but I've always been this way and that's that. Everyone that knows me well gets frustrated by this disability I have of not being able to say no. I keep saying I’m gonna stop doing it, but it doesn’t happen. I have been saying that for years and have not had a period of time where I said ok phone hasn’t rung in a month. Lets shut it down, I‘m gonna go be that housewife now! I want to be, but somehow JUST being that housewife makes me fear being ordinary. I know I am not alone in this sentiment as I do not want to offend those homemakers that do it with finesse. I truly inside WANT to be just a housewife! But then this inability to stop and smell the roses keeps me from it. I know my attention span is short but some weeks it is truly sad. I just haven’t been successful in finding that perfect balance since I've been working from home for over 5 years.
I always try and keep the mentality that if I do a little bit of everything all at once I can maintain more over time. But I fail to realize so much of my day is already promised to other things. Just because there is a space on the day planner it doesn’t mean I’m free. It means that I very likely have laundry, dishes, cleaning the toilets, putting up the clean laundry, washing the dog, mailing bills, doing Lula paperwork, doing EASI paperwork, blog, radio stuff, class stuff….blah blah blah blah blah blah…2 days post vacation I am just as freaked out as ever over what has to happen in 48 hours. WHAT is seriously wrong with me!???? And I think I want to have a baby in the next 12-18 months??? Im NUTS obviously. It is like I have to have someone tell me just STOP! I asked my husband, after listing all the things I had gotten myself into in 24 hours, if that was “an extreme amount of stuff to keep up with in one day.”
His answer never fails…”Ya Think?”
Am I ever gonna be able to practice what I preach about slowing down?
Am I ever gonna be able to prioritize and balance my own life?
What do I even want?
Dr. Brene Brown states in one her speeches that we suffer from this busy extreme disorder to avoid being vulnerable. I totally agree. I think that when we create a perfect bubble of what all we can do and how much we can handle we are really trying to surround ourselves with this force field that nothing bad will happen to us. It never works out though. We all know those bubbles eventually burst and we have to deal with the pain and suffering. But as she suggests, if we have these reservoirs of “Joy” built up in our system we can bounce back that much easier from strife.
Joel Osteen is at this very moment telling me to talk to my mountains. Hmmm…I’ve prayed for God to help me figure it out but I’ve never actually talked TO those things that cause me anxiety. I think I fail to say no because I don’t want people to be disappointed in me. And when I have said no, usually it comes with some criticism or guilt from the person I say no to.
As I sit reflecting on my day of therapy lessons, grooming, packing lunches, dealing with a constipated child at the doctor who is going to need a flushing this weekend to clear him out, writing content for tomorrow’s class and Thursday’s blog I hit on one thing….
After working with this one horse at the therapy farm I have wanted to throw in the towel a few times after weeks of ground work because sometimes I step wrong and send him mixed signals from what his previous training was. I feel like there is this huge communication barrier sometimes with him and then I remember what I’ve been taught…it takes patience. I begin thinking …ya know, today was the first day that he didn’t flinch at me when I entered his stall. He didn’t mind me grooming him, he didn’t mind me being in his personal space. He seemed to lean toward me more and be more attentive to where I was going. A second one while laying down rested his head on my lap and breathed in my skin like we were good friends. I am starting to see that I am being accepted in the herd. I am trusted. It feels nice to see patience paying off.
As it is with everything else, there is no such thing as instant results. Like the patience I have to have with that horse I should have the same amount with myself. I know my inner nature and my previous training and it will take some time for me to stop flinching. I am going to keep shucking the dead weight even if it is just one thing at a time. I am focusing so much on taking it one day at a time that I forget it will all happen...eventually. It won't stay like this forever. I can do this! I see clearer and clearer everyday what is important to me and where my passion and talents lie. Being able to focus on these things, being grateful for what I have and practicing patience I pray leads me to learning to say no to the things that do not bring me complete joy. Leaving me with only what I love and desire remaining in my basket.
De-cluttering your spirit is much like de-cluttering your home…it takes patience, it takes determination and it takes lots and lots of maintenance!

Can your commitment be renewed in one weekend?

2010-10-11T06:06:00.001-07:00

Aaggggghh!!!! Monday morning! I sit in bed this morning contemplating the 5-6 pages I have started writing lists on in a small notebook beside my laptop. I keep thinking about what I witnessed this weekend and then flip flop to what I have ahead of me to accomplish before I leave for Arkansas Wednesday. I have to get some of this out of my head and onto the page. I feel a little anxious at the knew knowledge I have now. I am in fresh from our community’s Fall RefresHER Christian Women’s conference where I spent Friday evening and Saturday morning with nearly 75 women to grow and practice being present together in Christ.
Having a small performance with my bestie at the beginning of the conference I wasn’t really able to place too much expectation on the event as I was mainly focused on not throwing up a little since I was gonna be on stage…performing a Christian rap no doubt! We rocked it with a little adjustment here and there! I kinda knew we could do it but then anything can happen. I could have tripped on a mic cord, busting a tooth on the stage or something else just as embarrassing. I enjoy getting to do the things that were fun in high school and college like organizing events but “acting” was NEVER one of my talents.
After that was done…I was able to settle down and begin paying attention. God was there all weekend, working his hand in all that we did. It was really quite amazing. Most of you ( if you read me weekly which you SHOULD!) know that my husband and I changed our lives 5 years ago when we dedicated ourselves to Jesus and picked up our orders for purposeful living. I was amazed at the amount of peace in my heart. Most of the testimonies and speeches I heard gave validation to what I knew all along about how we should look at our opportunities. We really should see them as opportunities to delight the Lord. Just as I think I have also almost mastered trying to do that, I realize it is surely time to move on into something new. I know He is ready for me to grow and just like watching Jennifer Hudson’s “Behind the Music” I feel truly renewed and ready to embrace whatever the change!
On a side note -
Did you know that it was a natural disaster that took all the phone lines out in her hometown that prevented her peeps from calling in to Idol and voting for her another week? Did you know that she was the one who had to identify her 7 year old nephew’s body? And that her first performance back following that horrible ordeal was to sing the compelling song
“You Pulled Me Through” at the Grammys? A song she wrote BEFORE the tragic death of her brother, mother and nephew.

“You gave my faith back, faith was so hard to find
You gave me my life back, you were my lifeline
The love that you gave me is love that has saved me
Your strength is what made me strong
You held me and I held on”

“I held on“…wow!! I mean God’s grace is truly amazing! Look at her today. I sat this weekend, as the equally fabulous to Jennifer Hudson, Miss Kim Dunn led praise and worship for us. She spoke words from her heart that could only have come as a result of God’s finger dabbling in what was to be an extraordinary two days for us. I think all were moved, I know we all became closer and all felt refreshed in the spirit!
More than ever, I leave with the full intent to stop fighting those things that I realize now are just my natural tendencies, embrace those things that are really talents, stop trying to fit into other’s expectations of me and to truly find JOY in all that I do. As always I am committed to enjoying my now.
So where’s my right now?? Acccck!!! If I really think about it I will freak: a 20 person field trip; a radio show; a new class to begin teaching; another new class to begin teaching. In TWO days! We leave Wednesday evening to go enjoy 3 days of camping, good music, and better fellowship. I will return surely revived and ready to settle down and get back to work.
My mother asked me on the phone just last night…”okay now (most authoritative voice she has), when you get back??” Open ended to surely prompt my own reply first…I said “ I know, I am”. I understand, I have been scolded lately by husband and mother for the over committing that has been happening lately. I agree!

Join the Perfect Protest!

2010-10-04T10:16:00.000-07:00

Visit http://www.brenebrown.com/ or http://www.ordinarycourage.com/ to join the perfection protest!!!

Here is mine!

Where is the Instruction Manual?

2010-10-04T06:47:00.000-07:00

Through out my years as an organizer and business owner I have had many women approach me for advice. When I lived in Montgomery I was fortunate enough to have an intern twice a year through the Interior Decorating program at Auburn University of Montgomery where I still teach. Interns had to spend approximately 20 hours with me. You get to know someone pretty quick.
I was always amazed at how many questions they had and how they were hoping someone would tell them the secret to success. I had those questions too. I’ve learned only through trial and error that there is no secret to success.
You have to first discover your talents. If you are unaware of your gift from God you have no idea how to interpret your purpose, right? It takes a lot of self awareness. Often times there is no other way to gain self awareness except through some major life crisis.
After some soul searching to decipher the hidden meaning in any life changing event we are stronger, hopefully able to trust ourselves more and ask the questions necessary to encourage us to take the right fork in the road.
But we must be flexible. Plans can change, quickly! I’ve always been proud of my ability to zag when others are still zigging…I am a fast learner and am always aware of my damage factor. For months I have been trying to redefine myself in this new town. Montgomery had a population of over 202,000, our new town…under 15,000. Oh yea, it’s different!
My stand still is that I have been driven for several years now. Once we moved I still found myself traveling the 2 hours to Montgomery for clients even in this second year. In this new place, the emergency brake has been pulled several times now.
My husband and I were talking last night, as we have been many nights lately, about this 3rd baby thing. Which has lead us to talk about our current baby. Lula has had so many growing pains. I cannot bitch about my achievements or disappointments, I am thankful for each one. That is why this blog is called Lula’s Grace…if it were not for Lulagrace (www.Lulagrace.com) I’m not sure if I would be who I am today. But if Lulagrace were to cease to be, who would I be then? Lately I have had some definite time wasters and it just completely drags you down when it isn‘t just your business it‘s your baby. I only have my time for sale. I don’t have a product that I can re-coop the costs. I love to offer free advice but since our move to a smaller town it seems a difficult situation to be in. Money ruins many relationships but I have to contribute to my family, and my time is my product. My knowledge and experience is my service.
As a business owner, of anything, you must always be ready to reinvent yourself. You must stay ahead of the trend and stay current in your education. I have not been sure if I wanted to quit, take some time off or what? My husband says I flip flop from hour to hour. It’s true!!
After really thinking about it, I have made this decision. Lulagrace is a part of me. But I’m not Lulagrace. I COULD give it up, but I love my profession and would go organize for 4 days if someone called today and needed it done, even if they were 4 hours away!

Since her creation I have never known how to exactly clock out at the end of the day. My husband has been incredibly understanding to allow me to dedicate so much of my time to this 24 hour commitment. But it is time for me to draw the line between my personal and my professional life. I need balance restored between the two.
As of Oct. 4^th I will no longer answer calls after 5pm, I will no longer return Lula emails after 5pm. I will also book out my jobs so I am only on one at a time. My business hours are 8-5 just like everyone else. I am going to start enforcing my rates and if you want free advice, you can attend the introductory free class I am teaching at FUMC beginning October 13^th.
I love you all, but ask that you respect what I do. Yes, it is a talent and ideas pouring from my mouth are part of what makes me fun to be around, but it is also my J-O-B. The ability to organize a project and “Git er Done” attitude make me a plus to any function for sure. But it is wearing me out! And it puts no money in my pocket. Not to mention incredibly unfair to my paying clients. So, sorry to rant this morning. This is why I have been uncomfortable and ill at ease for over a month. For the past week I have been up at 5am each morning with this first on my mind.
While there is no instruction manual for discovering your own passion there isn’t one for running a business either. You learn as you go. I appreciate all my clients and I love to help out when I can. I am learning to say “No, thank you!”. Please don’t be offended or take it personal when I do.