Machinations of an Evil Tiny Kitty

Caledon, I Have Returned!

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Sun, 13 Sep 2015 00:03:00 +0000

I am rather dismayed at the fate that has befallen the town of Steelhead. I returned only to be able to claim what was left of my operations (a stash here, a stash there).

I found myself in need of a new ~~lair~~ base of operations and traversed the lands of Caledon until I found a perfect little parcel in Stormhold. Water access? CHECK. Out of the way? CHECK. A new beginning (yet again. Oh, the life of an independent mad scientist)? CHECK!

Gather together minions and secure the crate creature and squiddy thing, we are moving back to Caledon!

Farewell My Doppelganger

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Wed, 13 Nov 2013 06:08:00 +0000

I have been in hiding for quite a while now, so I have been remiss in updating this aether journal. I have also been remiss in noting the passing of one of my feline inspirations, Miss Scout aka "STK" (Stump-Tailed Kitty for her stump of a tail)...

Your petty, stubborn streak as well as your sense of humor and keen intelligence shall be truly, sorely missed. The dragging of your human ~~servant~~ caretaker's course textbooks into your litter box was a master stroke indeed! That showed him! Brilliant! I do send him my condolences.

May there be all of the kitty treats, wiggling things on strings, and fishies that you can possibly handle.

Adopt A Cat Month

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 20:49:00 +0000

Yes, I recognize that it is now the end of June and I was rather slow to speak of this, but June is Adopt A Cat Month.

I was rather lucky in that I grew up with a human that loved me and my family, as well as the other felines and animals of her household. But many other felines have not been so lucky and end up in shelters. Lest someone say that I have gone soft, to me it means ~~more minions~~! I mean ~~happy complacent humans~~!

I mean, oh...you get what I mean! You may also find out more about how you can give a good kitty a home, or visit your local shelter, ASPCA or Humane Society.

The kitty revolution will not be telegraphed.

Willard's Roommate

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 01:53:00 +0000

I thought I would stop by and check in on Willard the Jail Rat. I was most surprised to see that there was another rodent in his cell. A roommate perhaps? What is its name? I thought Willard did not like others in his cell with him. A rat loner.

It was most chatty in a Chester kind of way. It was rather hard to keep from eating him as he looked quite appetizing. I asked him how he was enjoying his new abode and he simply said "There are not enough things to gnaw on, and you know how we rats like to gnaw things!"

Oh, for Bastet's sake.

Stirring the Pot

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 14:29:00 +0000

Yes, I've been away for a while. I had some...things to tend to. I am just glad that the minions kept the place in good order while I was gone.

They better have...

I Know the Feeling...

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 19:12:00 +0000

Yes, I know how this feels...

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Thinking About...Ada Lovelace

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 22:22:00 +0000

Today I was thinking about Lady Ada Lovelace, a fellow female of technology and a bit of a role model to me. I met her once during my travels with my adventurer-inventor father as a very young kitten and curled up nearby, listening to her theories about the latest this and that. The person she was talking to seemed rather bored, but I was enthralled. I am most sure that we would have gotten along rather swimmingly and her thoughts on my latest doom rays, automatons and mechanical wonders would have been much appreciated.

That Babbage on the other hand...I don't know how she dealt with him on a regular basis. I hope she had a doom ray on stun nearby to pop him when he became too insufferable.

A Valentine for...ME?

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 19:45:00 +0000

It seems The Demon put a valentine in the latest edition of The Primgraph magazine for me. I do believe that I am flattered and rather tickled by the picture of the fishie with it. Speaking of fishies, the ones he gave me a while ago are doing quite well and provide a regular source of snacks.

Winter in Steelhead

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 13:51:00 +0000

I gave my neighbor two paws up for this one during the recent snow in Steelhead...

Parcel Rights for Sale to the Caledon Lab--SOLD

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 13:23:00 +0000

**SOLD. Thank you for your interest!**

I have given it much thought and have decided to sell the rental rights to my lab in Caledon Tamrannoch.

It is a 1024 parcel, single prim supporting 234 prims. You would continue to pay rent to Desmond Shang at 375L/wk (1500L/month). I originally paid 10K for it a year and a half ago, but I will ask for only 2000L or best offer.

It is somewhat close to the hub and the Sanitorium is behind you, in case things get a little crazy. Do feel free to contact me if you are interested. It is located here if you would like to take a look:

http://slurl.com/secondlife/Caledon%20Tamrannoch/154/81/22

A Day at the Dog Park

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 13:49:00 +0000

Sometimes I like to walk over to the dog park and mess with the canines. What the...is this one sniffing me??!!!Doom rays on "stun" work wonders...

Rather Damp in There I Say

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 14:07:00 +0000

Miss Burton's houseboat seems to have sunk into the harbor. I had nothing to do with this one...

What Does THAT Do?

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 20:00:00 +0000

While roaming Port Harbor today, I found a big red button saying "Do Not Touch" in The Redhead's lab. You would think, given the various and assorted things that I own that say that same thing, that I would know better...Oh my...RUN!!!!

I Almost Forgot

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 19:01:00 +0000

I almost forgot. I know that it is after the holidays, but my minions' gingerbread rendition of the Port Harbor warehouse won 2nd place in the contest. I snuck in later and took a bite out of the winner's.

Yes, I am that petty.

Happy New Year...Well, Not TOO Happy

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 05:00:00 +0000

And so a new year at the Lab begins...

Ask ETK: Flushed Away

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 13:55:00 +0000

Dear Evil Tiny Kitty,

My kitty Raven is obsessed with watching the toilet flush. Whenever I go to flush it, if she can get into the restroom she will run in and hop up on the seat and watch as it flushes down. Why?

Signed,
Porcelain God

Dear Porcelain God,

For some kitties, the siren call of the swirling water is too much for them. The strange white monster makes the noise, but then--wonder of all wonders--the water goes round and round. It disappears and then it is calmly back again. Where does it go to? Is it magic? Why...does...it...swirl? Those are questions many kitties ask themselves. I, for one, have no interest in seeing human waste matter swirling away.

Ew.

Perhaps your kitty has the same *cough* "quirk" as this one:

If you have any RL kitty questions you would like answered, feel free to send them to me inworld or at malegatto[at]gmail.com and I shall enlighten you a bit from a cat's point of view! I also accept pictures of them to feature as well.

Merriment and Mirth for the Holidays

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Fri, 25 Dec 2009 13:48:00 +0000

A good holiday to you and yours from Evil Tiny Kitty Laboratories...

Thinking About...Ebenezer Scrooge

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 13:17:00 +0000

I always appreciated Ebenezer's way of thinking: Sticking to his convictions and keeping his minion Cratchit in line, all while shaking his fist in defiance at the world. After all, is that much coal for warmth in the office really necessary? And his stance on workhouses and how to decrease the "surplus population" of the poor? Legendary.

So when I heard that he had been "reformed" I headed over to his place of business to see for myself. His minion Crachit was as chipper as ever, much to my annoyance. However, it was seeing Ebenezer being so "perky" himself that made my kitty stomach turn ever so slightly.

As I sipped my tea I asked him about his recent change of his ways and what brought it about. "Four ghosts? Really?" I asked. "Are you sure you hadn't been sipping much that evening?" He insisted he had not and said that he even saw his old partner Mr Marley. "My God man, what was in your gruel?" I asked. I offered him the name of some experts in spirit removal--as well as that of a psychiatrist--but he declined, saying he was a reformed man. I told him that I would miss our scowling contests (he usually won). He said that I should try being nice, I might like it, to which I said only one word:

"Humbug."

A Rather Interesting Rez Day

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 04:59:00 +0000

I ventured out of the Lab to particpate in Steelhead's Holiday Storytelling Festival and perform my "12 Days of Mad Scientist Christmas" to an appreciative audience...
Lest anyone think I am anti-holiday, I rather enjoy the season and the prospect of gifts of fishies, mice, and doom rays. Not to mention sharks in tanks...sharks not in tanks. It warms my heart, but not as much as the coal I seem to receive instead. My Hidden Paw colleague, ChairmanMe Yowman was there, and engaged The BunnyElf in a round of fisticuffs...I attended the dance afterwards with music presenter Diamanda Gustafson, whose snowflakes were in the form of skulls. I was thrilled. She was also wearing a rather interesting hat...I normally do not like dances, but I checked the calendar and realized it was my rez day. Another year of dodging enemies and friends and I am still here to tell the tale!

Holiday Recitation of the 12 Days of Steampunk Mad Scientist Christmas

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 17:41:00 +0000

Tomorrow, do come out as I shall be ~~caterwauling~~ singing my "12 Days of Steampunk Mad Scientist Christmas" song at the Steelhead Holiday Storytelling Festival. It will be held from 5 - 7 pm SLT at the Steelhead Library Gardens in Steelhead City. I go on at 6:30.

The Elf was so kind as to recite it for me last year. I shall spare him this time. For those of you who would like to follow along, I am reprinting my lyrics here:

The 12 Days of Steampunk Mad Scientist Christmas
by Malegatto Alter

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...a tock lobster in the warehouse
On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...two Tesla coils
On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...three brass cogs
On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...four rubber gloves
On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...FIVE BIG AIRSHIPS!
On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...six mobs a yelling
On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...seven folks a screaming
On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...eight rats a running
On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...nine minions missing
On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...ten labs a burning
On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...eleven beakers bubbling
On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...twelve diff'rence engines

And for the fun of it, my version of "The Christmas Song"...

"Minions falling into an open fire
Police breaking down your door...
Brass robots with their eyes all aglow
Will find it hard to beep tonight..."

Yes Cato, there really is a Santa Claws. See you all tomorrow.

Wandering St Helens

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 04:21:00 +0000

I had some, ahem, "business" to take care of recently so I was away for a while. Upon my return, I thought that I would explore St Helens, Steelhead's latest sim. It seems to be rather rustic...I don't know about all of this fresh air and "nature". Yes, the snow was fluffy and white and I wished to pounce and leap through it, but I heard there are bears about in these parts. Then again, it would be quite the silly bear who would come too close to me...
I did climb the mountain to add my flag to the other "claims"...

The Elf Made Me Do It

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 16:09:00 +0000

Many of the children from Babbage have recently immigrated to Steelhead and are staying in Miss Razor's hostel in Boomtown. These little humans seem to be a rather lively lot and are very intrigued by my squiddy thing. I would much advise them to behave regarding it, lest it sees them as "snacks." One of these scamps had become lost in the woods the other week and injured himself quite badly. Dr Beck, who is our resident physician was unavailable when a distress call from them for help came out.

"Are you not a doctor?" The Elf inquired. I rolled my eyes and muttered that I could care less as it was the boy's own fault and his leg should fall off or something for his idiotic roamings. After all, what is a mangled hand or black lung here or there when it comes to them?

"But DR Alter...this is a child," The Elf implored. Did he not hear what I think of them--with their germs and tail-pulling, bear hugging ways? "I would imagine that working for you is rather hazardous. The minions injure themselves all of the time. You must have something?"

With thoughts of dealing with The Redhead and her arsenal in my head, I went over to the hostel with the first aid kit the minions cobbled together. I sighed and cursed under my breath that it was The Elf that asked me to help. Hmph. He could probably hear me complaining from sims away with those ears. I had a right mind to just toss the aid kit at them and keep going, but much to their gratitude, I patched the young miscreant up. After a threat, I departed...running right into The Elf upon my leaving. I could see the big smile on his face and scowled.

"Aw, I knew you could never do anything bad!" he said, very much to my chagrin.

I told him to keep an eye on his house...and his hair.

Squiddy Thing Back to "Normal"

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 14:50:00 +0000

I have been watching Squiddy carefully since his recent expulsion of the gent he had digested. It seems to be recovering a bit nicely and has taken to waving about once more.

I should probably set out the ham again, just in case, so that one of the scamps do not end up inside next.

Steam Willard is Out

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 14:08:00 +0000

I set out the larger version of Steam Willard the Rat at the warehouses, which reminds me that I must pay a visit to the live one.

Mmm...Mmm...Good?

noreply@blogger.com (Evil Tiny Kitty) — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 16:45:00 +0000

While taking my morning stroll around Port Harbor I walked down the the docks near the Navy headquarters and came upon this mother hen and her little chicks. I licked my fangs and thought that chicken would be nice for breakfast. I saw the seals, and considered making short work of the little one, but all of the fat in it probably would just come back to bite me in the end.