Madeleine Begun Kane's Notables Blog, Song Parodies, Satire, and Verse from MadKane.com

Blog Relocation Limerick

Tue, 26 Sep 2006 02:45:00 PDT

Big News! Mad Kane's Notables has moved, and is now Mad Kane's Political Madness. I explain why I made the change here. But first, a limerick to celebrate my political blog's relocation:

Blog Relocation Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Coding by hand is quite hard.
It takes time from my being a bard.
So I now blog with WordPress,
New name, look, and address.
Please link, so my traffic ain�t marred.

Bush Clouds Issue With Clarity - Political Verse

Mon, 18 Sep 2006 23:55:00 PDT

Clarity in torture rules?
Bush must think we're drooling fools. ...

Ode To Ann Althouse - Commentary and Limerick

Mon, 18 Sep 2006 00:27:00 PDT

Poor Ann Althouse! Jessica Valenti looked discernibly female in a blogger group photo with Bill Clinton, and Ann is aghast, appalled, and dismayed! ...

Bully Bush

Mon, 11 Sep 2006 23:12:00 PDT

Haiku about GOP and Bush exploitation of 911 ...

Ode To ABC

Mon, 11 Sep 2006 12:15:00 PDT

Haiku about defamatory ABC 911 movie ...

The Rumsfeld Trap

Mon, 11 Sep 2006 12:15:00 PDT

Two haiku about the Bush administration ...

Bush's Favorite Hymn Gets A Rewrite: Amazing Disgrace

Sun, 13 Aug 2006 22:55:00 PDT

So, not only is Amazing Grace George Dubya's favorite hymn, but it actually reduces the poor sensitive lad to tears. Do you think my new set of lyrics will make Bush cry too? ...

The Ballad Of Joementum Joe Lieberman

Tue, 01 Aug 2006 23:05:00 PDT

Joementum Joe, you've long outstayed your welcome.
You've let us down, it's time to pay the price.
You've been disloyal to voters and your party.
You're way too close to Rummy, Bush, and Rice. ...

Some Offbeat Items

Tue, 01 Aug 2006 21:30:00 PDT

In honor of today's first offbeat item, today's snarkery shall be in French ... to the extent I can remember my high school French...

Hey Condi, When They Asked You To Be A Hands-On Secretary of State, This Isn't What They Meant

You'd think that with all the disasters overtaking the world, Condi Rice would be far too busy to play Brahms or Shostakovich at a piano recital (and to do all the practicing essential to ensure a respectable performance.) But apparently Condi has some time on her hands...

No Liebe For Lieberman

Joe Lieberman thinks he's entitled
To votes and devotion unbridled.

Ode To The Groper

When diplomacy's needed, Bush gropes.
With his veto, he murders our hopes...

How To Give A Speech (Humorous How-To)

In a moment of weakness you agreed to give a speech. What are you in for? If you're lucky, it won't be any worse than this...

Coulter Heist

For Ann, facts are pests that intrude,
And we've learned she's a plagiarist too...

Ode to Norm Jenson of OneGoodMove

It's Tuesday, which means it's time for me to name this week's Blogger-Verse Blogger of the Week. And the winner is Norm Jenson Of OneGoodMove. Here's the personal limerick I've written in his honor...

Bush Isn't God. Who Knew?

The Supremes slapped George Dubya quite hard,
Saying George, you ain't Czar, King, or God...

(Peter) King-Sized Menace

Peter King and his ilk defy reason
When they call the Times "guilty of treason." ...

Swift Intrusions

From the Times we know Bush likes to sift
Through our bank records managed by SWIFT...

Blogger-Verse Blogger of the Week

Last Tuesday I launched my Blogger-Verse Blogger of the Week feature and named Skippy my first Blogger of the Week. As I said back then, every week I'll pick a deserving blogger and write him or her a personal Blogger-Verse. Well, I'm pleased to announce this week's winner -- Avedon Carol. Here's the personal limerick I've written in her honor: ...

New Yawkers Are Polite ... So There!

I'm a proud New Yorker, so I was pleased (and unsurprised) to read that a Reader's Digest poll ranks New York "the most courteous major city in the world." ...

Dub's Shriveling ... Coalition

Bush's mission remains unaccomplished, as his Iraq coalition continues to shrink...

Blogger-Verse Blogger of the Week: Skippy the bush kangaroo

Today I'm launching my Blogger-Verse Blogger of the Week feature. Every week I'll pick a deserving blogger and write him or her a personal Blogger-Verse. And in the words of my first Blogger-Verse winner, yes, I coined that phrase! Here's the personal limerick I've written in honor of Skippy the bush kangaroo: ...

Arlen, The Intellectual?

Not only is Arlen Specter a coward, but he's an arrogant coward who apparently fancies himself an intellectual. I'm referring to Specter's obnoxious description of Senator Harry Reid as "not a deep thinker, to put it gently."....

Ann's Master Plan

I've been trying to figure out why the mainstream media keeps letting Ann Coulter get away with verbal murder, and I have a theory that involves an odd form of sexism. Or is it reverse sexism? ....

Specious Specter; and I'm Glad Zarqawi's Dead, But...

Limericks for cowardly Specter, etc....

Mad Kane Reads The AP, So You Don't Have To - Song Parody

In a series of recent posts, the TalkingPointsMemo has done a great job dissecting John Solomon's misleading AP articles on Senator Reid. Unfortunately, John Solomon isn't the only thing wrong with the AP: Check out Andrew Taylor's Democrats-are-crazed-liberals piece. Or you could spare yourself the anguish of reading it, and just sing my "Mad Kane Reads The AP, So You Don't Have To." ...

Jeb For Prez?

I'm late on this, but I just can't resist writing a Bush dynasty limerick...

Wedding Anniversary Limerick

Tomorrow (June 4th) my wonderful husband Mark and I are celebrating our 28th wedding anniversary. Happy anniversary, Mark! ...

Tabloid Times

Wed, 24 May 2006 04:38:00 PDT

It's only May 2006, and the New York Times is already doing trashy, tabloid-style coverage of the Clintons. What's the matter, New York Times? You didn't have a juicy Iran-war-inducing story to plant on your cover page? ...

Frist And Hastert Rediscover The Constitution

Tue, 23 May 2006 14:18:00 PDT

Frist and Hastert don't care if the Bush administration invades the privacy of ordinary citizens. Nor do they seem bothered by the Executive branch's brazen power grab, evidenced by Bush's "de facto veto" signing statements, Congressional oversight avoidance, and sundry law breaking. But just let the Justice Department mess with one of their own, by raiding his House office, then suddenly Frist and Hastert whip out their long forgotten copies of the Separation of Powers clause...

Ode To Rep Jefferson

Mon, 22 May 2006 14:18:00 PDT

Rep. Jefferson seems to have stashed // 90 grand in his freezer - cold cash. ...

Big Boys Cry Uncle When Wrong

Sun, 21 May 2006 14:18:00 PDT

I've been a huge fan of John Aravosis and his Americablog since shortly after he launched it. In fact, I cited Americablog as one of my favorites when I was interviewed by Bloggasm.com. But I was both stunned and offended when John used the phrase "big girl" to mean cowardly, in describing Sen. Pat Roberts...

Net Neutrality Ad Madness

Thu, 18 May 2006 15:41:00 PDT

The excellent Buzzflash has written some fine editorials on the puzzling self-destructiveness of prominent lefty bloggers who post a "deceptive telecom ad aimed at undermining the Internet." I agree with Buzzflash, as you can see from my Net Neutrality Ad Madness limerick...

Sleeper VEEP

Mon, 15 May 2006 16:01:00 PDT

There once was a GOP VEEP
Who in meetings fell soundly asleep...

We Have Bush's Number ... and He Has Ours

Fri, 12 May 2006 11:41:00 PDT

Most telcos caved in to requests
From the Feds that fail privacy tests...

Mother's Day Limerick

Thu, 11 May 2006 11:41:00 PDT

A day that's unique, like no other,
Is the day that we celebrate mothers...

Tax Cut Haiku

Wed, 10 May 2006 11:41:00 PDT

Waxing deficits,
Lax, ballooning war budget...

Probable Cause To Spike Mike's Nomination

Mon, 08 May 2006 11:41:00 PDT

Mike Hayden has so many flaws.
For one, he likes to break our laws...

Fishing For Accomplishments

Mon, 08 May 2006 11:41:00 PDT

I couldn't resist writing a haiku in honor of Bush's self-described "best moment" in office...

And Now For Something Different -- Multitasking Madness

Sat, 06 May 2006 02:01:00 PDT

I'd been meaning to comment on the new government study about multitasking drivers -- the one with the "Duh!" conclusion that distracted drivers tend to have more accidents. But then I remembered this...

Ode To Signing Statements and Other Limericks

Thu, 04 May 2006 00:01:00 PDT

I'm glad that Bush's presidential signing statement abuse is finally getting some serious attention from the media and, it appears, from Arlen Specter. And that brings me to this limerick...

White House Shakeup Song Parody and Limericks

Tue, 25 Apr 2006 02:01:00 PDT

My latest song parody is The White House Shakeup Song, sung to the tune of Good King Wenceslas...

Only Lefties Are Crude. Who Knew?

Mon, 24 Apr 2006 00:45:00 PDT

Daniel Henninger's latest Opinion Journal column's a doozy. It seems poor Dan's offended by the language used on blogs, citing as examples MySpace, the Huffington Post, and the Daily Kos. Putting aside the odd juxtaposition of My Space with Huffington and Kos, did you notice anything missing in that list? You guessed it -- apparently poor old Dan couldn't find any offensive language in right-wing blogs. What a surprise...

Dubya Ain't Known For Decorum

Sat, 22 Apr 2006 23:15:00 PDT

Rachel Maddow, my favorite radio talk show host, has a posted a priceless photo on her blog: President Bush tugging on China President Hu's jacket sleeve. And if any photo deserves a companion limerick, that's the one.

Scotty and Andy and Josh, Oh, My!

Fri, 21 Apr 2006 23:00:00 PDT

Who can say no to a limerick request -- okay, it was more of a hint, than a request -- from Cookie Christine at Recess-Time?

Ode To The Decider-In-Chief

Tue, 18 Apr 2006 23:00:00 PDT

In an apparent bid to change his nickname from Leaker-In-Chief to Decider-In-Chief, Bush lashed out in Rummy's defense Tuesday, petulantly bellowing "I'm the decider, and I decide what's best..."

A Pair Of Limericks For A Six-Pack Of Generals

Sun, 16 Apr 2006 23:00:00 PDT

I'm delighted that those six great Generals are speaking out against Donald Rumsfeld, though I wish they had spoken out sooner. Of course, if a certain military historian is to be believed, it's all some sort of book sales conspiracy. Then again, it could be something even worse. And that brings me to my latest limericks:

Scalia's Stability Revisited

Thu, 13 Apr 2006 15:25:00 PDT

It's one thing for a Supreme Court Justice to refuse to recuse himself from a case involving his pal and hunting mate Dick Cheney. But it's quite another to practically brag about it:

Nuclear Limericks

Tue, 11 Apr 2006 19:15:00 PDT

Although Atrios is taking a wait and see approach to Bush's sanity, I think Bush's messianic insanity has been obvious for years. The only question is whether anyone will stop him from starting World War 3 And that brings me to these limericks:

Ode To The Leaker-In-Chief

Sun, 09 Apr 2006 22:15:00 PDT

Rep. Henry Waxman sent an excellent letter to our Leaker-In-Chief. Hmmm, perhaps I should send Prez Leaker this poem...

Tom DeLay Haiku

Sun, 09 Apr 2006 22:05:00 PDT

I couldn't resist writing yet another poem about Tom DeLay...

Tom DeLay Duo Of Limericks

Wed, 05 Apr 2006 00:55:00 PDT

Tom DeLay's a very inspiring fellow...

Time To Bring Back My "Say Goodbye To Tom DeLay Song Parody?"

Mon, 03 Apr 2006 23:00:00 PDT

The AP's reporting that DeLay is dropping out of his Congressional reelection race and that he "is likely to resign his seat and leave Congress by the end of May." And the Washington Post has some handy DeLay chronology. So I guess it's time to bring by my "Say Goodbye To Tom DeLay" song parody from earlier this year...

Mugged By Dub's Drug Program -- Limerick

Sun, 02 Apr 2006 20:50:00 PDT

This story about the prescription plan sign-up problems encountered by HHS Secretary Leavitt's parents would be funny if it weren't so emblematic. I guess being poster parents for Bush's failed drug program is hard work....

Immigration Blather

Sun, 02 Apr 2006 15:20:00 PDT

I really need to stop watching the Sunday morning "news" shows...

Saturday Silliness

Sat, 01 Apr 2006 15:00:00 PST

Sorry. I just can't help myself...

Bloggers Cook? Who Knew?

Thu, 30 Mar 2006 15:00:00 PST

As I mentioned previously, Ginger Mayerson and Kathy Flake enticed many bloggers (including me) to contribute recipes and food related prose, illustrations, and verse to a Doctors Without Borders fundraiser blogger cookbook. Well, the book's finally available for purchase and it looks great! You can buy And They Cook, Too: A Blogger Cookbook fundraiser for Doctors Without Borders right here.

And if that isn't enough to persuade you...

Ode To Scalia - Limerick

Wed, 29 Mar 2006 12:30:00 PST

As John says, release the Scalia church photo. And that brings me to my latest limerick:

The Donation That Keeps On Giving

Sat, 25 Mar 2006 22:20:00 PST

Keith Olbermann named Barbara Bush "Worst Person In The World," and who am I to argue? Earmarking her tax deductible Katrina Fund donation to Ignite, her son Neil's education software company, is outrageous enough. But to make matters even worse both Barbara Bush and husband George are Ignite investors. Which brings me to this poem:

The Rich And Unethical Harris - Limerick

Wed, 22 Mar 2006 13:10:00 PST

I just can't pass up the opportunity to make fun of Katherine Harris...

Russ Feingold Verse

Sun, 19 Mar 2006 21:03:00 PST

The Praiseworthy Senator Russ
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The praiseworthy Senator Russ
Has created a rather big fuss...

Only Bush Can Protect Us Some Say

Fri, 03 Mar 2006 13:30:00 PST

Only Bush Can Protect Us Some Say
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Only Bush can protect us some say,
Though George Dubya deceives us each day...

Bye-Bye Balls - Dubai Port Deal Limerick

Sun, 26 Feb 2006 19:30:00 PST

Remember Bill Frist's outspoken criticism of the Dubai port deal? The one that inspired me to write It's Surely Snowing In Hell? Well, Frist seems to have had a change of ... uh ... position...

It's Surely Snowing In Hell (Dubai Seaport Humor)

Thu, 23 Feb 2006 15:40:00 PST

I felt compelled to write another poem about the UAE Dubai seaport deal and Republican reaction to George Bush's defiant and outrageously misguided plan to let his good pals in the United Arab Emirates manage our ports...

A State-Run Firm Based In Dubai -- Limerick

Tue, 21 Feb 2006 23:30:00 PST

President Petulant's been stomping his feet again. How dare Congress-Critters question and maybe even block Bush's insane plan to sell port management rights to a firm owned by a country waist deep in terrorist ties...

A Funny Blog Is Born

Tue, 21 Feb 2006 22:30:00 PST

Sometimes I encounter someone so funny and politically savvy, I feel compelled to do the blogmother thing and harass him until he starts blogging. My first vic... uh ... blogchild was the delectably witty Steve Bates. Well, I'm pleased to say Steve now has a blogbrother -- the very funny Don Davis, who launched his Satirical Political Report during Presidents' Day weekend...

Faking Contrition Song Parody

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 22:30:00 PST

I can't seem to stop writing song parodies about Cheney's shooting mishap. You can hear me sing my Faking Contrition here, to the tune of "Waltzing Matilda." Here's how it starts:

Faking Contrition Song Parody (Sing to "Waltzing Matilda")
By Madeleine Begun Kane

"Faking contrition.
Faking contrition.
Cheney feels bad that he shot his good friend.
If you don't buy his story, you're a lib'ral Democrat.
Leave him alone. This harassment must end..."

Don't Hunt With Dick Cheney Song Parody

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 00:00:00 PST

I just couldn't resist writing a song parody about Dick Cheney's quail hunting misadventure. You can hear me sing my Don't Hunt With Dick Cheney here, to the tune of "On Top Of Old Smokey." Here's how it starts.

Don't Hunt With Dick Cheney Song Parody (Sing to "On Top Of Old Smokey")
By Madeleine Begun Kane

"Don't hunt with Dick Cheney.
You might end up dead.
He'll aim for your torso,
Or even your head..."

Cheney Misfires Big Time and Other Political Verse

Mon, 13 Feb 2006 13:00:00 PST

New York's blizzard is finally over, but I'm still sore from shoveling snow. (When we have six inches of snow, neighbor teens eagerly peddle their snow shoveling services. But when we have two feet of snow, hubby Mark and I are on our own.)

Oh well -- enough complaining. It's time for some political verse. First, a limerick about Dick Cheney's quail hunting mishap, in which he shot 78 year old hunting mate Harry Whittington in the face, neck and chest...

Arlen and Alberto

Poem about Arlen Specter's refusal to require Gonzales to testify under oath...

Ode To Press Hypocrisy and Other Oprah Winfrey / James Frey Verse

Seeing the Daily Show's hilarious take on the Oprah / Frey brouhaha reminded me that the James Frey fray deserves some verse: ...

Personal Poems For Some Sam Alito Filibuster Holdouts

Do you think a personal poem might change a Senator's mind? Probably not, but it's worth a try. So I've written some personal verse for four of the Sam Alito filibuster holdouts: Senators Byrd, Landrieu, Akaka, and Nelson...

Political Hilarity

Review of the musical revue Bush Wars, review of a book of political verse, and more.

Ode To Takeout Song Parody

In a departure from MadKane.com's customary poltical and legal humor, this post includes food and cooking related humor: a limerick about being a bad cook and a song parody about addiction to takeout menus.

If Not Now, Then When? -- Sam Alito In Verse

Commentary, a limerick, haiku, and three other poems about Judge Sam Alito.

Spying and Lying -- 5 Limericks

5 limericks called "A Bush Pioneer Who's Named Jack," "George Bush Says His Spying Is Cool," "Consultation Dubya Style," "Did The White House On Christiane Spy?" and "Preacher Pat:" ...

Say Goodbye To Tom DeLay -- Song Parody -- Sing to "Yesterday"

Now that Satan ... I mean Jack Abramoff has entered into a plea agreement, Republicans are rushing to distance themselves from Abramoff. Of course, Tom DeLay has been doing the distancing dance for a while now, with an assist from Susan Schmidt and James Grimaldi at the Washington Post. But (at the risk of using Judy's Miller's least favorite word) Tom DeLay's entanglements with Abramoff are so extensive, that their legal ramifications may well turn DeLay's money laundering trial into the fun part of 2006 for good ol' Rep. DeLay. And that brings me to my latest song parody: Say Goodbye To Tom DeLay. ...

Separated At Birth: Judy Miller and ...; Yippee! I won!)

For months I've been puzzling over who Judy Miller reminds me of, and I've finally figured it out -- Harriet Sansom Harris, from Frasier and Desperate Housewives: ...

Auld Lang Impeachment -- Song Parody

I thought I'd help you celebrate New Year's Eve with my new version of Auld Lang Syne -- Auld Lang Impeachment. You can read it right here or hear me sing Auld Lang Impeachment here. ...

Bill O'Reilly's Faux War On Christmas Song Parody

Today I'm joining the many who've mocked the false claim that there's a war on Christmas. I hope you'll enjoy singing my Bill O'Reilly's Faux War On Christmas song to the tune of Get Me To The Church On Time, from My Fair Lady...

Mad Kane on the Radio; Randy Cunningham Limericks; Ode to Bob Woodward -- Text Plus Audio Version

Lots of political poetry today, but first some news: I'll be on the Cityscape radio show on WFUV, 90.7 FM in New York City on Saturday, December 3rd. It airs at 7:30 A.M. and is also streamed on the Net. And for late risers (like me) it'll be archived at WFUV. (I'll update this entry when the show's been posted there.) The topic's freelancing and the workplace, and my contribution to the fray is reading one of my work related humor pieces, Working Stiffed. Okay, it's time to get back to politics. I thought I'd celebrate Congressman Randy Cunningham's guilty plea with a pair of limericks. Plus I've written Bob Woodward an ode: ...

Yet Another Ode To Ann Coulter; An Unscrupulous Fellow Named Jack

I hope all of you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. As for me, I gave thanks to the Abramoff investigation and a big no thanks to Ann Coulter. And I also gave each a limerick: ...

Wacky-Off: Jean Schmidt vs. Pat Robertson -- Text Plus Audio Version

I can't decide who's wackier, Ohio's Jean Schmidt or Pat Robertson. Here's my pair of limericks about Jean Schmidt's outrageous House floor speech, in which she called John Murtha a coward because of his Iraq withdrawal plan: ...

Yet Another White House Leak: Ethics Class Humor -- Text Plus Audio Version)

Now that Harriet Miers' office has announced mandatory ethics classes for all White House EOP staffers, I guess we're supposed to forget about Libby's indictment and Karl Rove's ethical transgressions. Of course, these classes are nothing more than window dressing designed to dupe us into thinking Bush gives a damn about ethics. How do I know this? A top secret White House source leaked this Harriet Miers memo to me, in a MadKane.com exclusive: ...

Some Say That Reid's Act Was A Stunt -- Limerick)

I'm newly in love with Senator Harry Reid and Rule 21. Senator Frist, however, doesn't share my feelings. And that brings me to my latest limerick: Some Say That Reid's Act Was A Stunt...

Four Samuel Alito Limericks -- Text Plus Audio Version

Now that Harriet Miers is back doing whatever it is she does best (writing Bush mash notes and covering his tracks?) Bush has a new nominee to replace Justice Sandra Day O'Connor. And I'm afraid he's just the sort of extremist judge we feared a weakened Bush would come up with - 3rd Circuit Judge Samuel Alito. And that means it's time for some limericks: ...