Mademoiselle Mitchell

#MusicMondays (Blogger Style)

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Thu, 15 Sep 2011 02:23:00 +0000

International Travel Challenge: Day 2

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Wed, 06 Jul 2011 05:28:00 +0000

Day 02 – Where you’d like to travel next

Back in 2007 I wrote this blog post where I identified the next 10 countries I'd like to visit. Funny enough, they still hold true for the most part. However, I think #1 has officially become Thailand, which I fully intended to visit this summer before life happened (aka I decided it'd be cool to take a new job).

I'll try to make it in 2012 though! (Although I also wouldn't complain if someone sent me to any of the other countries on my list first...)

Who in their right mind wouldn't want to spend time

somewhere with water that looks so perfect?

International Travel Challenge: Day 1

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Wed, 22 Jun 2011 13:35:00 +0000

So I'm late to the 15 Day International Travel Challenge, but I figure it's better to start late than never! Over the next several days I'll be posting based on the following timeline:

Day 01 – Favorite place(s) you’ve been to
Day 02 – Where you’d like to travel next
Day 03 – An adventure/challenge you had while traveling or living abroad
Day 04 – A picture of you in another country
Day 05 – What do you bring with you when you travel?

Day 06 – What does “home” mean to you?

Day 07 – Besides people, what did/do you miss from home?

Day 08 – A favorite food from another country/culture
Day 09 – A song you like from another country/language

Day 10 – A favorite foreign movie
Day 11 – Did you have any milestones or “firsts” while traveling or living abroad?
Day 12 – Someone who influenced you to travel abroad
Day 13 – A favorite travel quote
Day 14 – What did you learn from traveling abroad?
Day 15 – Advice to someone who’s thinking about traveling to another country

I may not post daily and I may skip around, but it'll be fun!

Day 1: Favorite Place I've Been

Visiting the south of France was by far my favorite trip while studying abroad. We went to all the typical places - Cannes, Monaco and Nice - but my favorite place was a small town that only took an hour to see, Eze. As I wrote in my travel blog it was a cute old town, very tiny, and left very much as it was many many years ago. And when I say tiny, I'm referring to everything from the actual size of the town to the size of the doors! And the view of the Mediterranean sea was spectacular!

More pics...

Be Inspired

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Mon, 06 Dec 2010 06:49:00 +0000

A friend shared this with me.

I found it inspiring, so I'm sharing it with you.

Blessing for a New Beginning

In out-of-the-way places of the heart,

Where your thoughts never think to wander,

This beginning has been quietly forming,

Waiting until you were ready to emerge.

For a long time it has watched your desire,

Feeling the emptiness growing inside you,

Noticing how you willed yourself on,

Still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watched you play with the seduction of safety

And the gray promises that sameness whispered,

Heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,

Wondered would you always live like this.

Then the delight, when your courage kindled,

And out you stepped onto new ground,

Your eyes young again with energy and dream,

A path of plenitude opening before you.

Though your destination is not yet clear

You can trust the promise of this opening;

Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning

That is at one with your life's desire.

Awaken your spirit to adventure;

Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;

Soon you will be home in a new rhythm,

For your soul senses the world that awaits you

-John O'Donohue

2010 is Practically Gone. Now What?

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Thu, 02 Dec 2010 04:50:00 +0000

2010 didn't quite go as I expected. I'm sure that's no surprise to many of you. I'm even more sure that you feel very similarly about this past year. What's interesting is that for me it turned out far better than I could've expected - both the extreme highs of the triumphant moments and the extreme lows of the emotional "stuff" that makes life not so awesome.

For it all, I'm eternally grateful.

I started 2010 with nothing more than a vision board to carry me through. After the phenomenal growth I've experienced this year, there is so much more that I want to do to prepare for January. A lot is still in the works, but let's just say that I'm staring with a WHOLE lot of blank pages in my life. And I'm super excited.

Of the many things I'm doing to prepare myself for next year, reflection has been the number one priority. I've spent most of this year reflecting on things that have happened to me, my feelings about certain situations, my growth, my relationships, my career etc. I'm at the point where I'm ready to figure out what that all means, where I'm heading, and how I intend to get there.

So when Rosetta Thurman launched her challenge, 31 Days to Reset Your Life, I just knew I was in. I had been thinking already quite a bit about my professional goals, but I hadn't put enough emphasis on my personal goals and where the two met. I'm looking forward to taking part in the challenge since the activities will perfectly complement the planning I'm currently doing.

So join me over the next few weeks as I share some of my reflections with you and embark on a journey that's going to make 2011 even more phenomenal.

Photo Credit

It's My Birthday!

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Thu, 14 Oct 2010 04:00:00 +0000

24 years and I'm still going strong. I've been neglecting this blog while building my professional blog (http://www.nikitatmitchell.com/), but I haven't abandoned this one yet. I have posts I want to write. I'm just struggling to find the time. Stay with me though!

Oh and as a brief update, I cut my hair again. Why? Because I wanted to see what it looked like. The conclusion: it's fierce!

I Started a New Blog

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Thu, 19 Aug 2010 05:46:00 +0000

This blog chronicles my professional journey and development. My name is Nikita and I'm a twenty-something working hard to strike a balance between my career and personal ambition to change the world. Join me as I share my experiences on this journey called life.

Check it out: www.nikitatmitchell.com!

A three week vacation? Will you ever want to work again?

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 00:47:00 +0000

A good question when you really think about it. Even for overachieving A-types.

The longest vacation I've taken since graduating from college was Christmas ('08) & NYE ('09) in Jamaica visiting my sister, who was living there at the time. I went along with two of my other sisters and relaxed for two weeks. Beach, party, sleep. Well, not in that order. And, really, it was mostly sleeping. And then the beach. And then partying. But yea... I was trying to say that it was just the break I needed, and I don't remember having any trouble going back to work.

On Wednesday I left for Barbados on a 6am flight. It's Cropover season (the nation's carnival of sorts) and the immigration line was ridiculous and took almost two hours to clear. I'm here for a week spending time with my cousins, relaxing on the beach and enjoying the season's festivities until next week when we leave for our family reunion. This will be our third, each of which has happened 4-5 years apart, so it's kind of a big deal. Our reunions are held on Union Island, one of the Grenadines of St. Vincent & the Grenadines, which is the homeland of my grandfather.

After four days of planned activities, my parents and I are flying to Trinidad to spend time with my paternal grandparents. They don't know that I'm coming, and it's been like five years since I've visited them (they often spend months at a time in the US with us). This is rather frustrating for them, though, because I spent so many of my summer months with them in Trinidad as a child. Needless to say, I'm looking forward to seeing them.

As I sit here in my maternal grandmother's house writing this (in a notebook, mind you... how old school right?) and listening to the rain fall on the roof, I wonder what it will be like going back to work after 3 weeks. Will I feel super lazy or will I eventually tire of my family enough to run back to the airport?

I have so many goals for myself over these three weeks that it's almost not a vacation by some people's standards. Books to read (too many, I realize), writing to do (both journal and post ideas), and studying (GRE words - #womp). I'm betting between that and all the beach time, partying, and spending time with family that these three weeks will fly by. Moreso, I'm betting with all of this "work" I have myself doing I'll be more than able to ease back into the routine of life. Maybe even hit the ground running on the project waiting for me at work.

Only time will tell.

Review: "Bitch Is The New Black" rocked my world

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 04:32:00 +0000

You had to have been living under a rock over the last several months if you didn't catch the media’s obsession with letting the world know that black women are undesirable. If so, I submit Exhibits A, B, C, D, E…Z – and I’ll stop there even though there’s much much more. Well, in the midst of this ridiculous craze, a young woman named Helena Andrews made the spotlight. A single, educated, successful and attractive woman, she was featured in a Washington Post article about her, then, upcoming memoir entitled Bitch Is The New Black (aka #BITNB). The article focuses on Andrews’ life as a young black woman dating in DC and the frustrations that many like her feel trying to meet suitable companions in the city. While the article was interesting, it didn’t do the book justice. I couldn’t be happier that I stepped out of my used-books-only (or-seriously-discounted-bookstore-books-only) norm and ordered myself a copy. I read the book over the course of two days because I couldn't put it down. I absolutely loved it, and let me tell you why.

Her wit is razor sharp and her writing style is engaging.

He’s the Nigerian E-mail Scam of ex-sorta-boyfriends, trying to seduce me over cyberspace with promises of riches in the real world. Problem is, I’m black and I have a vagina, so my Waiting to Exhale intuition tells me this shit ain’t for real.

The memoir is a collection of 16 essays with titles such as ”Perfect Girl” and Other Curse Words and Riding in Cars with Lesbians. Nuff said right? It gets better, though. Andrews uses each of these essays to chronicle her past, smoothly jumping back and forth in time in many of them. She gives us insight into everything from her childhood to her professional endeavors post graduate school. She has a really intriguing childhood growing up with a lesbian mother who made them move around quite a bit and an even more interesting adult life filled with dating trials and tribulations, a friend/line sister who commits suicide, a best friend on the west coast, and a blossoming career in DC.

Her mother is awesome.

See, Frances does this. We’ll be talking about something FCC-approved for mothers and daughters, like, say, vaginal itch, and she’ll bust in like the emergency broadcasting system with a ‘What kind of birth control do you use’ or and ‘I’ve been celibate for almost a decade’ or an ‘Oh, so you two are just fuck buddies then. Beeeeeeep goes the filial flat line. Dead. She’s got mommy Tourette’s.

Simply put: Frances, Andrews’ mother, is awesome. Not more awesome than mine, of course. But on a scale for non-my-mothers, she hits the top. Beside the fact that she calls her daughter “little brown eyed girl” – my mommy calls me “precious” *smile* – she’s just an amazing fun-loving woman pulling Andrews through a childhood filled with unpredictable turns while working hard to raise her the best way she knows how.

She’s me. At the very least, she’s like my BFF.

I don’t feel almost twenty-eight. Not an actual adult, I’m more adult-ish. See, I’m just a girl. An awesome one, of course, but just one. And like so many other little brown girls my age, I believe the problem of loving, lusting, or even “liking liking" someone can be solved with a simple equation: x + y = gtfohwtbs (if “x” ≥ 28 years old and “y” = socially retarded men).

I connected to Helena like she was a new girlfriend telling me her story over sushi and way too many bottles of Riesling. She laughs. She curses. She complains. She gets excited. She struggles. She seeks love while still holding onto pieces of relationships that aren’t worth more than a penny. She’s a twenty-something. She’s me.

It was so exhilarating for me to read a candid and completely relatable memoir written by someone not much older than me. It’s like being in eighth grade and listening to the older kids talk about their daily lives, both in junior high and high school. You listen to the joys, the heartache, the triumphs with excitement for times to come while wondering how to avoid the future heartbreaks that are inevitable.

She and her best friend are hilarious.

‘Dude, what is your life about!?’ quizzes Gina every morning over IM like the opening bell of a boxing match, startling me into the ring of another Monday. The alarm to starting the day off single.

Frequent use of DUUUDE! and play by play accounts of online IM chats and texts with her BFF and various guys were enough to make me giggle like a little girl. My daily gchat convos with @Ladiee_D have not been the same since we put this book down. A convo just doesn't feel right without at least one use of the word. What did we ever say before to express our feelings? "Dude" just seems so much more fitting now for every situation.

She’s real.

I don't think Michelle [Obama:] minds bein our new muse. I think she gets it. We little brown girls - drunk off The Cosby Show, sobered up by life, and a little suicidal - we need her.

I love how willingly she shares her imperfections. In an effort to tell her life story she provides the reader with a view into her mind and allows us to laugh with her as she reflects on her moments of insanity, pain, confusion and joy. To judge her would be to judge both my current and my future selves. She makes mistakes, deals with broken hearts horribly, has terrible days and denies her need to emotionally release all while cherishing her family, friends and dog and living life as best she knows how. All of these things I know too well (except the dog part).

After all, isn’t that what the twenties are about? If not, then I guess I’m doing it wrong.

Helena Andrews is currently working with Shonda Rhimes, creater of my favorite TV show Grey's Anatomy, on the film adaptation of the book. I can't wait to see it!

I Cut My Hair

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 02:07:00 +0000

I still can’t believe that I didn’t cry. Instead, with a smile, I watched all my hair fall to the floor. There wasn’t an ounce of sadness. Just pride.

I had finally done it.

It was almost a year ago when I first considered cutting it all off. The nagging desire to do it came at a time when I was struggling with so many aspects of life: my relationship, my friends, my health, my job and my purpose. I was unhappy with so much, confused about a lot and downright frustrated with the rest. My hair had yet to become the change I was looking for, but I knew I wanted something different in my everyday life. I wanted to feel fulfilled. I wanted to feel like I was pursuing a passion.

I initially began pressing myself to plan for grad school, thinking that with my love for school that would be the change I needed. Despite the excitement I felt about possibly attending a school in Europe, or at least on the other side of the country, I quickly realized that I wasn’t ready to go back. I didn’t know what I wanted to do professionally (other than my current job), far less what I wanted to study.

So that ended that.

Then my post-college boyfriend and I broke up. And for reasons that would take another post to explain, this opened up my mind to a whole new world of possibilities that I previously wasn’t considering. Most importantly, it brought back a possibility into my life that I hadn’t considered since undergrad: the Peace Corps. It was something I wanted to do since ~~this bautiful man~~ a recruiter spoke to my freshman business orientation class. I was staunchly against working in Corporate America at that time, and to someone with a passion for service and a desire to experience new cultures (hence my International Business degree) this opportunity simply seemed too good to be true.

But life happened. Better yet, two corporate internships, parents who wanted me to get a “good job,” and a college boyfriend who I was considering spending the rest of my life with happened. But the breakup between me and my post-college boyfriend felt like a blessing in disguise. I was ready.

Once I committed myself to the Peace Corps application process, I became more and more excited about the opportunity to spend the two years abroad focused completely on making a change in a community and being challenged beyond belief. I was more than ready to jump start a whole new phase in my life.

It was exhilarating to feel so passionate about a goal that I felt was a complete reflection of me – not my parents, not my peers, just me. I imagined every step of the process, fantasized about the placement I might get and began to mentally prepare myself for the lifestyle adjustments I’d have to make. The possibility almost felt too good to be true. I felt like the character in my favorite book, Black Girl in Paris, was finally coming to life for me. Eden is a young woman who dreams of living in France and meeting her literary idol, James Baldwin. My favorite part of the book is when she finally decides to just up and go to Paris with only a few hundred dollars in her pocket:

"Before I left home I cut my hair close to my scalp so I could be a free woman with free thoughts, open to all possibilities... I didn’t know what I wanted to be but I knew I wanted to be the kind of woman who was bold, took chances, and had adventures. I wanted to travel around the world. It was my little-girl dream."

I’ve struggled to adequately explain what this book means to me – especially that excerpt – since I first read the book at 18. And while that paragraph has always had a profound effect on me, it never meant more than during the phase I was in last summer. I was ready for something new. I was ready to “be a free woman with free thoughts, open to all possibilities.” That was when I decided that I would cut my hair before my departure for my service in the Peace Corps. I planned on entering this new phase in life as a new me.

Now if you don’t know anything about the Peace Corps application process, let me give you a brief rundown. There’s an application, an interview, regional nomination, medical forms, medical clearance, financial forms, financial clearance and eventually (you hope) an invitation to serve in a particular country. I submitted my application in August, was interviewed in September, was nominated for Africa the day of my interview and spent the next few months completing the EXTREMELY comprehensive medical and dental forms.

Let me tell you, getting those medical forms filled out was by far the most frustrating experience in my life (and I’m sure my doctors’ offices felt the same way, bless their hearts). But finally, after much back and forth with follow-up information requests, I was told that my application was in full review and that I’d have to wait 6 weeks to 3 months to hear a response about my medical clearance.

So I waited. And squirmed. And prayed. And checked my mail. And whined to my friends. And waited. Finally received the letter. Read it. And cried.

And cried.

I’d been medically deferred. The Peace Corps told me that they could not continue to review my application for medical reasons and that I was welcomed to resubmit my medical forms if things changed. I was so confused. Why didn’t they want me? It’s not like I was dying or anything! I was so shocked. “No” was a word that I barely heard. And this one hurt more than ever.

About a week later I wrote a blog post about the “pause” I was taking time to think things through a bit and allow for my reality to set in. I’m very much a believer in all things happening for a reason, but I also just was not ready to begin thinking about what would be next. Afterall, I had very much built myself up to believe that the Peace Corps would be my next step.

During that time I got to thinking about a lot of things, particularly about how much personal growth I’d experienced through the application process, my relationship woes and my professional situation. I was proud of myself. Yet I knew there was so much more growth I wanted to experience. Making the decision about the Peace Corps for myself and by myself was the first step in me getting to know me on a deeper level. I wanted to continue breaking out from the fear of other people’s opinions, judgments, plans, expectations and disappointments. So I decided I would still cut my hair.

As a black woman who has been natural all of her life,“the big chop” wasn’t significant for me in the way that it is for so many others. Yet in many ways it was exactly the same. I wasn’t breaking free from the pressure to have straight hair or fit into society’s idea of what I should look like. Rather I was releasing myself from the pressure I’ve placed on myself to be something that I don’t have to be. I was giving myself permission to be authentic and true to myself at all times.

I want to be a free spirit. I want to be bold. I want to take chances. And while I still have a long way to go before I am able to embody many of the qualities that Eden talks about, every day I can take a small step toward becoming that woman. Last week I took a big leap when I cut my hair.

Be Inspired

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Tue, 18 May 2010 15:18:00 +0000

"I wish for you the kind of trails that help you discover your life’s work and give you the strength and faith to pursue it. I wish for you a life lived not in response to the doubts or fears or desires of others, but in pursuit of passions, hopes and dreams that are your very own."

--Michelle Obama to University of Arkansas Pine Bluff c/o 2010

The Case of the Missing Best Friend

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Mon, 10 May 2010 23:43:00 +0000

The transition happened slowly. We weren’t the type of friends who saw each other very frequently and neither of us particularly enjoys phone conversations. Rather, we would typically catch up every several weeks for a few hours over dinner and drinks. Even when we found ourselves going through a longer than desired period of absence from each other’s lives, a simple text expressing the need to meet up because x, y or z happened was enough to get something on the calendar ASAP. So when she slowly started disappearing from my life I almost didn’t even notice it. At least, until things got rough.

By that point we had gone months without speaking to each other more than once. I knew she was busy with her new teaching job, her engagement as well as grad school so I told myself the “you have to be understanding” story. However, I started struggling with things in my last relationship and I gradually became bitter as I realized she wasn’t readily available to be the listening ear and objective advisor I’d become dependent on.

I don’t open up easily to people, and I’m very selective about with whom I share what. I have another best friend who lives in Atlanta whom I spoke with every so often. But I’m an out-of-sight out-of-mind kind of girl, and this best friend was literally the only person I told everything to – including my secrets – without hesitation. She was the one I felt I needed. Yet she was nowhere to be found.

*Cue the loneliness.*

When the only other person you share your emotions with (other than your significant other) is unavailable, what do you do? You pick up and try to keep moving. But it’s hard when you’re doing it through the hurt, the tears and the confusion that you refuse to talk to anyone about. It’s even harder when you feel guilty for feeling bitter.

I felt I was being given a taste of my own medicine. I’ve always been that friend who never picks up the phone to call. Even worse, I’m guilty of screening calls and not answering because I’m in an I-don’t-feel-like-talking kind of mood. And if it’s not that, I’ve legitimately missed your call, yet my good intentions of calling back at a better time quickly get lost in my black-hole of a memory.

This is how I’d been treating my best friend in Atlanta. I reasoned that that's just me, and anyone who loved me would get it. So how could I get upset when the person I needed wasn’t there when I called? What do you do when someone you cherish, someone who had become so integral to your emotional well-being essentially disappears from your life? How do you adjust?

Well, I’ve gone through the experience of losing friends and, more recently, the process of realizing that certain people aren’t truly friends. So I’m beginning to think that this is the period where I learn to adjust to the changing nature of relationships.

My best friend doesn’t love me any less. If I needed proof, it exists in her poor attempts to respond to my communicated desires to connect. She has even randomly sent me a text letting me know that she’s thinking of me and misses me. These things mean the world to me and assure me that our friendship is still intact. However, the role she plays in my life has changed. It may be temporary, it may be forever or it may continue to evolve. Only time will tell.

The positive things that I’ve been able to take away from this experience include my commitment to being more active in my friendships (i.e. calling more or even just answering the phone often enough) and efforts to become more open to taking friends and family up on their offers to be a listening ear. While it’s easier said than done, life is not meant to be lived in a bubble. I'm starting to realize that ignoring and hiding from my feelings only makes things more difficult than they need to be, especially when there are so many people in my life available for me to lean on.

Nonetheless, I look forward to the possibility of having my best friend as a central part of my life again one day.

Image source

Why is Michelle Obama so fierce?

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 18:10:00 +0000

We all know that I have a slight obsession with Lady O, and on so many levels. One of my fave sites Mrs. O keeps me up to date on her flyness. I mean, would you just look at this outfit?

That is all.

A Bibliophile's Dream

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Wed, 21 Apr 2010 01:28:00 +0000

This weekend Stone Ridge School of the Sacred Heart in Bethesda, MD had its 37th annual used book sale. Known as one of the largest book sales in the Washington, DC area and listed among the top ten largest in the country, this sale had 14 miles of books (yep, you read that right).

If libraries and bookstores are what dreams are made of, used book sales are slices of heaven and this one offers up a seriously giant slice. Held in the campus gymnasium, the books are organized into over a dozen genres, ranging from children to chick lit to gardening to African American to history to business (and on and on).

The prices of books primarily ranged from $1 to $5, and all sales support the school’s scholarship fund (Stone Ridge's tuition is not cheap). On Friday and Saturday, books were sold at full price; on Sunday, everything was half off; and yesterday, a bag of books cost $10.

For those of you who read my blog or have spoken to me recently, my family raised funds to buy books for the library on the island where my grandfather was born and raised. We held a raffle which helped us raise over $2,000. My mother and I were allotted a budget of $500 to buy young adult books. On Sunday alone, we purchased four boxes and three bags full of books for around $400. Yesterday, my mother and I picked up another five bags for $50 – a few of which were for our own personal libraries though!

Needless to say, this is an event to mark on your calendar every year. To get more information, visit the website and sign up for the mailing list. If you are interested in donating books to the school, they are accepted throughout the year.

My New Favorite Place

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Mon, 12 Apr 2010 17:50:00 +0000

In my mind, it's DC's version of Central Park in NYC. It's called the National Arboretum (which keeps coming out as arbortorium in my head, don't ask why), and it's located on the edge of DC in NE between NY Avenue and the Anacostia River.

A friend of mine introduced me to the place this weekend. Having grown up in the area, I cannot believe that I've gone 23 years without knowing of its existance! It was the absolute perfect spot to spend a relaxing Sunday full of sunshine.

There are all kinds of sights to see, including a Bonsai tree exhibit (shown left), the national capital columns (above), beautiful gardens, and many paths/walkways to explore. Do yourself a favor, and check it out.

See the Yelp site for some great reviews and suggestions.

Finding My Power

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 00:55:00 +0000

I was never a runner. My running experience and skill is limited to the couple years I joined the track team in high school to kick it with my girls ~~and watch cute boys at track meets~~. So it has come as a bit of a shock to me how much I've grown to love running.

It started only a few months ago. I'd created a regular workout routine, consistently working out a few days a week at BodyTalk. It was the longest I'd remained committed to any kind of working out routine - partly because it's a lot of fun and partly because it suits my schedule better than the gym classes I love such as cycling.

But I didn't feel like that was enough. BodyTalk is really just for strengthening, particularly for your arms and core. I knew my classes there couldn't give me the cardio I needed, so I randomly started running. It made me feel like any other great workout would - after pushing through it you feel both invigorated and proud of yourself. However, I discovered that there was something to love that I'd never appreciated before. Running makes me feel powerful beyond belief. I'm on a high when I listen to my playlist (filled with dancehall and soca to keep me moving, of course). I almost feel invincible.

But even beyond the physical, there is the mental challenge of running that appeals to me. I'm not a competitive person by normal standards. You won't catch me trying to run better or faster than the next person. But I'm super competitive with myself. I am my worst critic, and I definitely don't like disappointing myself. So when I run 3.5 miles (as I did today), I expect improvement the next time.

And that's the part that I need the most. The mental stamina is so much harder to come by than the physical stamina. There are so many points during my run where my body is capable of pushing it further, yet my mind is telling me to slow down or run a shorter time.

I'm at a point in my life where I'm experiencing so much growth. I'm also aware of how much growth has yet to occurr. As I continue to make running a regular part of my life, I believe that the same feeling of power that overcomes me during my workouts will take hold in my personal and professional life. The mental strength I build will develop the courage and committment I'll need to face future challenges that come my way.

I'm working with a theory here, but my goal is to follow through in order to see the results.

Rocking the Red Pump: Women and HIV/AIDS

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 04:33:00 +0000

I'm rocking the Red Pump today in honor of National Women and Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day. The goal is simple: raise awareness.

I must admit: I do not know any women with HIV or AIDS (or open to me about it, rather). However, I find this damn near impossible when I look at the statistics. I find it even more impossible when I look at the alarming rates that black women and girls are affected in my own community.

HIV is the 5th leading cause of death in women in the United States, ages 25-44. Every 35 minutes a woman in this country finds out she's HIV positive. Black women make up 66% of all new diagnoses of HIV in women.

It gets scarier, especially for those of us living in the DC Metropolitan area. The rate of women in D.C. infected with HIV/AIDS is nearly 12 times the national average. According to the Washington Post, in "at least 3 percent of District residents have HIV or AIDS, a total that far surpasses the 1 percent threshold that constitutes a "generalized and severe" epidemic.”

Last I knew, epidemics were faced with much more urgency. So that begs the question, at least in my mind, what will it take to not only increase the urgency in our own community, but also get the full attention and support of our leaders? I mean... what will it take for you to truly believe that this is a serious issue??

I remember when I first got tested. It was in school at Howard. Honestly, I only did it because I heard they didn't need to draw blood. (I have this fear of blood and needles that I'm beginning to get over so don't judge me please!) Since then I've been tested by swab and/or by blood just about each year. And each time it's the same. You take the test and you wait for results. I don't care if you're abstinent, that wait is nerve-racking whether you’re waiting 15 minutes or a few days (to get lab results back)! But it’s entirely worth it.

Knowing your status empowers you. Finding out that you are infected allows you a fighting chance. Finding out that you are not means you are blessed to be one of the few who will get to live without the disease another day.

So please. Don’t be a part of the 21% who don't know they are infected with HIV. Get out. Get tested. Know your status. And raise awareness.

If not for yourself, do it for the betterment of our community. Our lives depend in it.

Statistics from the The Red Pump Project website.

Respecting the Pause: Wisdom from Alice Walker

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 03:10:00 +0000

"Wisdom, however, requests a pause. If we cannot give ourselves such a pause, the Universe will likely give it to us. In the form of illness, in the form of a massive mercury in retrograde, in the form of our car breaking down, our roof starting to leak, our garden starting to dry up. Our government collapsing. And we find ourselves required to stop, to sit down, to reflect. This is the time of "the pause," the universal place of stopping. The universal moment of reflection."

So you have your mind, heart and soul set on a goal. You work hard and push forward toward that dream. Focused. Determined. Passionate. You do all that you can do, and you are told there is time you need to wait. That’s just the process. So you wait even though waiting is far from your strength. You get anxious. Quite frankly you’re almost squeamish because you are so excited about this dream you are pursuing. But you wait because you know it is worth it, and there is nothing else you can do.

Finally you receive the news. It’s not the news you expected to hear. You just knew how this was all going to play out, and this news was definitely not in that plan. Matter of fact, you wouldn’t have even planned for this type of news if you had created a contingency plan. I mean it totally came from left field.

The news sinks in. You internalize it, and you grieve. You grieve because it hurts to have something you wanted so badly no longer be within your grasp. Then you go to sleep. And you wake up.

Now the question is: what do you do next?

Well, I don’t know about you, but the A-Type side of me needs to have that answer. However, through this thorough and personally challenging process that pursuing that goal required, I’ve experienced quite a bit of growth. Growth that I’m only now seeing as I sit and take pause.

In her book We Are the Ones We Have Been Waiting For Alice Walker says, “if we cannot give ourselves such a pause, the Universe will likely give it to us.” Ironically, and almost bizarrely, I reread this meditation (the book is a compilation of various meditations she wrote) the day before I received my news. When I first read the book I didn’t think much of it, but when I reopened it a couple weeks later this was the one that grabbed my attention. In reflecting on my situation, I believe that I have been given a pause. And it is my intention to take it.

So when you see me, don’t ask me what my plans are for my life. Because I don’t know. Don’t ask me what’s next or how long I will be staying at my firm. Because I don’t know. When you see me, don’t even ask me when I’m going to grad school or what I’m going to study. Because I don’t know. And I don’t need to know right now. I’m respecting the pause.

And if you’re worried that I’m discouraged or getting "off track," just stop your worrying right now. I’ve grieved, and I’m okay. Furthermore, I still intend to live out my purpose. There is no changing the innate part of me that is driven to succeed. However I am well aware that there are many paths to that purpose. Right now I’ve been told to take a detour (whether temporary or permanent), and I’m simply taking some time to sit on a bench in the park to enjoy the scenery.

The Gift of Books

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 05:00:00 +0000

Update: The raffle is over and we raised over $2k!! Thank you so much for your support!

My love for books should come as no surprise to any of you who know me and/or read this blog. This love for books runs through my blood. As a result, it should really come as no surprise to you that my family is currently raising money to give the gift of books.

Our Alexander Family reunion will be in Union Island (where my grandfather was born) in August of 2010, and we would like to donate at least $1,000 worth of books to the library, which at present has a very limited collection.

In order to accomplish this goal we are selling $5.00 raffle tickets for a 19'' TV! I hope that you will help to make our goal possible. The date of the reunion is fast approaching so the drawing will be held on April 3, 2010.

So what are you waiting for? It only takes 5 minutes! Here's what you do:

Click the orange "Donate" button at the top of this page.

Enter your donation amount. $5.00 per ticket and $20 for five tickets. However, feel free to donate any additional amount if you heart desires!

Either log into your existing paypal account or click continue under "Don't have a PayPal account?"

Continue toward checkout. BUT... be sure to use the "Add special instructions to seller" section to tell me how many tickets you are purchasing as well as a phone number to reach you if you win!

Your support is much appreciated, and I look forward to sharing stories and photos of how your donation made a difference!

A little about Union Island

Southernmost island of the Grenadines belonging to the state of St. Vincent and the Grenadines
Situated 90 kilometers southwest of Barbados and the islands of Carriacou
The mainland of Grenada can be seen to the south
Located 40 miles from St. Vincent.
About 3 miles in length and half that in width
High, rocky, and dry and is largely covered in thorny scrubs
Dotted with cacti and free roaming goats.
Home to approximately 3,000 residents and Clifton and Ashton are the two principal towns

Review: By The River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 03:25:00 +0000

“By the River Piedra I sat down and wept. There is a legend that everything falls into the waters of this river – leaves, insects, the feathers of bird – is transformed into the rocks that make the riverbed. If only I could tear out my heart and hurl it into the current, then my pain and longing would be over, and I could finally forget.”

And so the novel starts out. The most beautiful opening paragraph I’ve ever read in my life. And unless you are heartless or have never been in love, I don’t know how this wouldn’t at least rank somewhere on your list of most beautiful passages.

By The River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept was written by Paulo Coelho. He is best known for writing The Alchemist which just so happens to be my least favorite of the three books I’ve read by him. My introduction to Coehlo was The Zahir which was, like the other two I read, a beautiful story of love. Neither of those however prepared me for the beauty I would find in that very first paragraph of the novel.

It then continues:

By the River Piedra I sat down and wept. The winter air chills the tears on my cheeks, and my tears fall into the cold waters that course past me. Somewhere this river joins another, then another, until – far from my heart and sight – all of them merge with the sea."

A couple pages later the protagonist, Pilar, takes us back to the beginning to tell the story of how she ended up weeping for this young man. They seemed to have always loved each other, even as childhood friends. However, they grew up and took separate paths in life. He chose to leave their small town to learn about the world (a theme present in both The Alchemist and The Zahir) while she chose to take the prescribed path of enrolling in a nearby university. They kept in touch throughout his travels, and one day he invited Pilar to hear him give a lecture in Madrid.

The story is a whirlwind from here. Pilar struggles to accept and embrace her feelings for him. He struggles to reconcile his love for the seminary, the gifts he has been given and the love he has held onto for so many years. While the beauty of their love story as it unfolds kept me wanting more, I found myself disappointed, especially toward the end when I didn’t feel the same intensity of emotions as I did with the opening paragraphs.

Like the other Coelho books I’ve read, By The River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept carries a spiritual theme, as he touches quite a bit on the mystical nature of God. In this particular piece, he focuses on the young man’s belief in a feminine God that grants him the power to heal. For some this may be an appealing aspect of Coehlo’s writings, but it tends to throw me off. It gives me some of the same vibes that the Celestine Prophecy gave me, which is more eerie than anything else.

Nonetheless, I enjoyed this book. I have two more books by Coelho that I want to read, one of them comes with high praise from Miss Melissa. And if you know me, you’ll know that there are VERY few authors from whom I’ve read more than one book. I must really like this guy.

C'est Mon Anniversaire!

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 05:00:00 +0000

It all started three years ago, today. Mostly because I was bored. Also because I was in a new country, reading lots of books, missing my boyfriend and looking for an open ear - or in this case, interested eyes. And my travel blog about my experiences in France was not enough to keep me entertained.

And here we are! Woohoo. I’ll keep writing as long as you keep reading. Who am I kidding, I write on this thing knowing that I might be the only one reading. So let me rephrase that: I’ll keep writing as long as I keep thinking.

Happy Birthday C’est La Vie!

Do you know what time it is!?

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Sun, 14 Feb 2010 05:13:00 +0000

Girl Scout cookie time! I live for this time of the year. Ok.. maybe that's a slight exaggeration but you get the idea. This time of the year could seriously compete with Christmas for "The most wonderful time of the year," in my life at least.

My personal favorite? They come in a purple box of goodness. The Girls Scouts call them Samoas. I personally don't care what they are called. In my opinion, they don't need a name to be eaten.

I've already done my Antie duties and order three boxes from my nieces. However they live in NJ so I'm guessing that will be my stash for post-sales cravings. In the meantime I will be camping out in front of my local shopping center, eagerly anticipating the day the girls begin selling them.

What's your fave Girl Scout cookie?

Review: Women, Race & Class

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 11:00:00 +0000

A few months ago I started on a quest to educate myself about feminism, especially as it relates to black women. As a result, my GoodReads queue has become filled with books on beauty, books written by authors like Alice Walker and even couple books on hip-hop feminism. I've recently been introduced to authors like Bell Hooks, and I'm constantly learning of others to add to my list. As with my general fascination with learning, the more I read the more I realize I don't know and want to find out.

[Insert fascination with Angela Davis' books.] Need I say more about why I chose to start with this particular one?

Written in 1983, Women, Race & Class takes a serious look at the intersection of feminism and racism in America. In this collection of writings, Angela Davis touches on a range of topics that point to the struggles of the Black woman fighting to fight for equality in a movement that fails to include her.

It starts with a telling and often gruesome discussion on the female slave, detailing the laborious expectations on the field coupled with her complex role in the home (slave quarters). She even goes into the brutal punishments regularly inflicted - from the abuse experienced by pregnant women to the brutal rapes at the hands of white men. This, for me, was the hardest part of the book to read because of the raw brutality illustrated.

The subsequent essays delve into the history of the women’s movement and the influence of African-Americans, most notably the likes of Fredrick Douglas, Sojourner Truth and Ida B. Wells. As the book progresses Davis articulates the various issues that were used to ostracize black women from the overall women’s rights movement since the late nineteenth century. Whether it was excluding black women to gain support from the South for women’s suffrage or ignoring issues of forced sterilizations when it came to reproductive rights, there has always been an unfortunate division in the movement that ultimately and consistently left the needs of Black women unaddressed.

With Women, Race & Class, Davis brings these issues – and more – to light with the message of unity for the benefit of everyone in the fight for equality. It's definitely a must read, especially for young black women like myself.

A favorite quote:

Evidence of the accumulated strengths Black women have forged through work, work and more work can be discovered in the contributions of the many outstanding female leaders who have emerged within the Black community. Harriet Tubman, Sojourner Truth, Ida Wells and Rosa Parks are not exceptional Black women as much as they are epitomes of Black womanhood.

10th Annual National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Sun, 07 Feb 2010 17:36:00 +0000

I only learned about this day two days ago, but couldn't pass on the opportunity to learn more and spread awareness. According to the CDC, it's a day for "national HIV testing and treatment community mobilization initiative designed to increase the awareness of HIV/AIDS prevention, care and treatment among Blacks in the United States."

Some statistics for you to share with others today:

AIDS is the leading cause of death for black women aged 25–34 years
At the end of 2006 there were an estimated 1.1 million people living with HIV infection, of which almost half (46%) were black/African American
Blacks with AIDS often don’t live as long as people of other races and ethnic groups with AIDS. This is due to the barriers mentioned above
Rate of AIDS diagnosis for Black women is approximately 23 times the rate for white women and 4 times the rate for Latina women
Black teens (ages 13–19) represent only 15 percent of all teenagers in the United States but are 68% of new AIDS cases among teens

To get more information, check out the Center for Disease Control and the Black Aids Day websites. If you do only ONE thing today, spread awareness.

Fave Commercial Fridays: Staples

noreply@blogger.com (Nikita T. Mitchell) — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 20:03:00 +0000

This one had me crackin UP the other day. Enjoy.