Magnetic Matrimony -- My Journey as Part of a Serodiscordant Couple

What They Say Is True: You Do Have to Go There to Come Back

magneticmatrimony@gmail.com (Magnetic Mama) — Thu, 2 Dec 2010 19:55:00 GMT

When I was asked to write a wrap-up blog my first thought was: Well that's just silly. It's still aaaages till the end of the year. That clearly shows just how out of touch with time (and maybe a little bit of reality) I have drifted. I returned to South Africa nearly three months ago and it almost feels like I never left. My travels, the experiences and wonderfulnesses I experienced feel a little like a beautiful but distant dream to me now.

I started off in London in January, where I met two people who were both part of magnetic couples. From there I went to Thailand, jungle-trekking and island hopping, via Australia and New Zealand to Argentina. Here I spent a whole month not speaking yet strangely still understanding a whole lot of Spanish, climbing a glacier, snorkeling with sea lions and realizing for the first time that HIV doesn't need to dominate my thoughts, my marriage and my life, too. I whizzed through Peru and Bolivia (lots of colours, amazing food and freedom to let my mind and soul truly rest and wander). I was joined by my siblings for the three-week, 7,500-mile road trip through Canada and the U.S., attempted kite surfing in the Dominican Republic and had my aura cleansed on the same day I was scammed out of an airplane ticket in Mexico. All in all a fantastical, life-changing, thought-provoking and liberating journey.

Changes in Climate, Altitude, Landscape and Perspective

magneticmatrimony@gmail.com (Magnetic Mama) — Mon, 24 May 2010 18:32:00 GMT

It has been a long time since my last entry. I won't apologise, because the past few months have been life-changing, mind-blowing, horizon-expanding and at times refreshingly mundane, but I will try and share with you some of the reasons for my hiatus from this blog and contact in general.

Just to backtrack a little, since the diagnosis of my husband (then still boyfriend) in 2006, there had not been a day I had not thought about HIV in one way or another. Sure, it didn't help that I subsequently took on a job in paediatric HIV clinics, where it was unavoidable, but in general, I kind of had the feeling that it was something I, as a partner and loved-one, needed to face head-on. And for a good while, that was the best thing for me; informing myself, confronting my role in this (or what I thought it was), adjusting, supporting and seeking support.

Three Countries and Six Weeks Later and a World Has Opened Up

magneticmatrimony@gmail.com (Magnetic Mama) — Tue, 2 Mar 2010 21:20:00 GMT

After spending a month travelling around Thailand, without a map, guidebook, plan or clue, not thinking about anything yet pondering everything at the same time, I have now arrived in Sydney, Australia, and am ready to re-join the (virtual) world.

Since my first blog post went out a few weeks ago lots of people have got in touch with me and within the space of 48 hours I literally went from feeling isolated and alone to feeling like one of many who potentially felt the same way. It was such a relief!

Ready or Not, Here I Go!

magneticmatrimony@gmail.com (Magnetic Mama) — Thu, 4 Feb 2010 17:55:00 GMT

A few weeks ago I departed from South Africa and with it left behind (albeit temporarily) my job, my husband and the life I'd been accustomed to over the last 5 years. The reason for this is that I was disembarking for a journey. A trip around the world spanning 10 countries over the period of six months in search of ... well, I still haven't figured that one out for sure.

First of all I know that I needed some time out. The question is just from what?

Starting My New Adventure

magneticmatrimony@gmail.com (Magnetic Mama) — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 19:00:00 GMT

Ok, so this is me, Magnetic Mama, welcome to my blog! I am very excited to join the list of TheBody.com bloggers, and I think I might bring a slightly different perspective to the amazing bunch of people already out there. I am the negative i.e. uninfected half of a HIV magnetic couple. In my eyes (err...ears) 'magnetic' sounds so much more positive than serodiscordant because it implies attraction rather than some kind of clash (that's not to say I don't have any of those with my hubby...)

I am fairly new to this form of communication but I have somehow managed to make a Mini-Mama 'WeeMee', which kind of looks like me *burstwithpride*. The reason I am not showing my actual photo is to protect my husband, who is not open about his status and I don't want to inadvertently disclose it by proxy.