Transcript:

Welcome back to The Good Business Podcast. I’m your host, Illana Burk, and today’s topic is one I get pretty fired up about. Today we’re talking about why it is the right thing to do to give out your work, your very best work, generously, and everywhere you can.

Today’s episode is inspired by a recent experience I had signing up to attend a quote unquote, really useful webinar. Long and short of it is that literally every time I break down and go like, yeah, I’m going to stop being such a know it all and I’m going to sign up for that webinar and I’m going to listen to that podcast or attend that workshop,

I’m sure I’ll learn something. I am almost always reminded why I shouldn’t. And maybe I am just jaded, honestly. I mean, there’s no maybe. I’m just jaded. But really, good God, the absolute absence of real ideas or new information these days is downright painful. I’m sure everyone listening has had that experience of falling into somebody’s marketing funnel and very persuasive sales language and you think, This is the webinar that’s gonna not be a waste of my time, and then it is.

And then it’s, you know, a whole bunch of Q& A you didn’t ask for, and a whole bunch of fluff, and maybe one itty bitty tiny interesting point buried under a mountain of salesy garbage. This was no exception.

On this particular webinar. I sat through like two hours of talks from six different, I’m doing lots of air quotes today, leaders, quote unquote, leaders, uh, all talking about pretty, like one really pretty juicy topic.

I mean, I signed up for it because the topic was interesting to me. And I was curious what these people would have to say about it. And they all had that, like, I’m a big time, fancy leader who has it all figured out voice. You know, it’s very like stern and a little bit patronizing, you know, it always reminds me of the waitress at restaurants that walks up and it’s like, you hear her talking to her coworkers and she sounds completely different and then she walks up to your table and she’s like, hi, welcome to whatever restaurant, how are you today?

And it’s just so like false. That’s the voice. You guys know the voice.

And they all with one small kind of almost exception that was actually kind of interesting and useful and happened to be somebody that I personally know, which is funny, said absolutely nothing new, like nothing at all. And they all actually basically said the same exact things as each other in different ways, and none of them address the elephant size hole in their fundamental position that they all shared.

And yes, I am being vague about this intentionally. Usually I am happy to like name names and whatever, but like, this is just not a drag worthy topic. It’s not about them. It’s much more about the more macro topic. And I don’t really want to be explicit about that. Cause that’ll make it about that and not about actual points.

So we’re going to just go ahead and like verbally “vague book” here.

The much bigger point is that seriously, how do people make money wasting other people’s time this much? Makes me crazy. It’s just, one of my biggest pet peeves. I just legitimately do not understand the point of all the regurgitated nonsense. I can’t even call it content because it lacks any actual real content.

When I was starting out and this is, oh my god, I’m like, I’m literally doing like back in my day comment here, but I’m, I’m going in. Go with me here, right? I’m okay if I sound old.

When I was starting out, bloggers talked about putting your absolute best work out there for free.

I loved that, clearly. I do that. I always have. I guess I missed the memo somewhere along the way when that was supposed to have changed. I just kept doing that because it felt good, it felt right, and it’s been very, very successful for me. So, that’s what I built my business around.

So many people have built their businesses saying they want to create change through their ideas, that they want to help people through their work, but then they make them jump through every possible hoop to get anything of real value.

Like that doesn’t, that’s not helping. That’s not helping. And all that tells me is that one, you are short on actual brilliance or creativity. Two, you care about money way more than change or other people or your work actually proliferating out into the world in any meaningful way. And three, you never stop to think about what you’re doing.

And when you do shit like this, it instead follows the same tired playbook that created all kinds of companies and culture that you ran from when you started your business, right? Let’s sell them fluff, more fluff, more fluff, with just enough kernels of good stuff that makes you just dig a little deeper.

That’s a marketing funnel, folks, for those of you at home, right? Like little, little bits so that you have to go deeper and deeper and deeper to get the actual content. And it’s like just enough, like little breadcrumbs until like, I always think of Hansel and Gretel when I think of marketing funnels, like little bits of candy until pretty soon you’re in somebody’s oven.

Right? Okay.

So my guess is that this is a product of ever increasing pressure to produce more and more and more content. I think that’s what that came from.

Somewhere along the way, we started saying that things had value instead of actually making sure that they have value. You know, as we feel this urge to produce, the more diluted our ideas become because we first were told that we have to have a singular idea like our singular our big core message. I mean, I teach this. Yes, I teach this, but I also teach you how to break it down and address everything around your big ideas.

But most people just go here’s my one thing. And if I give away the solutions around my one thing, then I won’t have anything to sell, right? So I better hold back the solutions to my one big thing until you’re actually paying me.

And it’s become a deeper and deeper manifestation of scarcity. And it’s, it’s really a bummer because like it, it fosters the idea that the creative well is going to run dry eventually, but it’s like, it’s a totally backward solution because in the climate of increasing competition, and this is the most important part.

If you’ve like tuned out and you’re not actually listening to me yammering on, this is the part where you should tune back in. Okay.

Because in a climate of increasing competition, the very last thing that any of us should be doing is watering down our ideas that make us special. That’s the very last thing you should be doing.

Because special is what gets attention. Special is what makes an impact. Special is what breaks through the crowd and makes you sound interesting. And most importantly, special is what helps people. And if you say that’s what you’re here for, special is what you need to put out there. Freely. Openly and repeatedly.

Now, I know the standard objection to this is usually something like, but if I give it all away, why would anyone buy anything from me? The answer is very simple. People hire you because they have already seen that you offer amazing value repeatedly and freely. They hire you because now they know you’re brilliant and they want more of your brilliance applied to their specific problems.

We have to stop behaving as if our creative well will just suddenly run dry one day. It won’t. So give as much as you can without compromising your ability to sustain yourself and your work in the world. That last bit is also pretty important. It’s what I’ve done for my entire career and I don’t have a single regret.

Okay. That is it for today, everyone. As always, thank you so much for your attention and for investing in good business.

Giving stuff away is not the easiest topic and uh, we all have to do it as part of our businesses in one way or another. And I just want to encourage all of you one last time, give things freely because the world needs you.

And if you wait for people to hire you all the time, the world never gets a chance. So give it away. All right. If anybody has, uh, questions or things to say about this, uh, I would love it if you come find me on social media. I’m easy to find on Facebook these days. And this is something that I would love to, um, engage with more about with anybody who would like to talk about it.

So, all right, everybody have a really great one and I will see you all in a couple of weeks. Bye.

Transcript:

Hi there and welcome back, everyone! As promised, today is the second half of our two-parter on getting and giving feedback. In our last episode, we did a deep dive on asking for and successfully receiving feedback. Today, we’re going to cover how to give it in a way that doesn’t completely hurt the person who’s receiving it.

The assumption we’re beginning with today is that you actually want to be good at this and that you want to have the other person’s feelings and best interests at heart. Now, why feelings, you ask? Because we don’t often talk about feelings in business, and that’s something we’re changing. They matter. For too long, we have all, collectively, in a million tiny ways, made other people’s feelings their responsibility. However you feel is your responsibility over there. I carry no responsibility for it, especially in business settings. This allows people to do and say almost anything under the deeply reductive idea that it’s not personal, it’s just business. This mindset has resulted in generations of deeply alienated and lonely people living under the boot heel of those who have convinced themselves that they simply do not have to bother with caring. And that’s where we’re starting today, because I think that’s terrible and has kind of messed up our entire culture in a rather significant way.

So today, we care about feelings, and that’s the backbone of the conversation. When we care about feelings, there are four parts to artfully giving feedback:

1. Check Your Ego:

Offering feedback is not about you. It’s not a promotional opportunity or a moment to show off how smart you are. Know that you may be wrong and be at peace with the person not integrating or taking your feedback. They’re under no obligation to do so.

2. Check and Acknowledge Your Bias:

Your perspective is not their perspective. Your context is not their context. Before offering feedback, recognize your differences in situation, resources, and how important the matter might be to them versus you.

3. Know Your Lane and Stay in It:

Only offer feedback if your expertise, knowledge, and experience are relevant to what’s being asked. If you’re not the right person to speak to the topic at hand, don’t.

4. If It’s Going to Sting, Say So, Then Be Direct:

Keep your voice even, avoid sarcasm and sugarcoating, and prime the recipient for what you’re about to say. Ask for consent before delivering the feedback.

Remember that feelings matter.

If you have to say something that’s going to be hard to hear, keep your voice even, avoid sarcasm, avoid saccharine apologies, try not to sugarcoat, and simply prime them for what you’re about to say.

Ask for consent. Let them know what they’re in for and then give them a second to center themselves so that they don’t feel like they’ve just been knocked onto their heels by a boxer or something, right? You owe them that.

Once they’ve given consent, rip the band-aid off. You don’t hem and haw. You don’t sugarcoat. Nobody is well-served by overly sugarcoating, overly explaining things, or by not saying everything that needs to be said. If you’ve done all those other things, right?

You are a person who’s in a position of expertise. You are the right person to be asking. You know for sure that you checked in with your biases. You understand that they are asking you for something that you are well-qualified to offer them. Nothing good comes from you pulling your punches at that point. That’s not helping them.

So you have to be direct and you have to be willing to go out on that limb and recognize that that’s going to hurt and then be there for them when it does and help them come up with solutions. That’s how you can give feedback without being a total jerk.

That’s it, everyone. As always, you honor me with your attention. Thank you very much for working so hard to run a truly good business and to care about other people’s feelings. It warms my heart. I hope you all have a wonderful week, and I will see you all very soon. Bye, everybody.

How to Ask for and Take Feedback

Welcome back, everyone! Today, we’re diving into a topic that frequently sparks those “oh my god, why can’t people get out of their own way?” conversations I often have at dinner. We’re talking about how to ask for and take feedback. Next episode, we’ll cover how to give feedback effectively.

Feedback is one of those areas where many think they excel, yet few truly do, especially in the age of the internet, where feedback mechanisms can sometimes devolve into marketing ploys or avenues for venting personal frustrations. Remember when we could buy a toaster without consulting 25 strangers online? Neither do I.

Why Feedback Matters

Feedback is crucial; it challenges us to grow and improve, particularly in creative fields. But it’s an art, not just a set of algorithms.

How to Ask for Feedback Like a Pro

1. Be Discerning: Ask the right people. Don’t take a shotgun approach to feedback which leads to decisions based on a wide but irrelevant set of opinions.
2. Be Specific: Clearly outline what you need feedback on, including relevant context and what types of feedback you aren’t looking for.
3. Format Matters: If you’re writing, break up your text. Long paragraphs are daunting and often not fully read. Structuring your request can greatly influence the quality of feedback you receive.
4. State Your Biases: Be upfront about your attachment to the project and how much feedback you can realistically handle without feeling overwhelmed.
5. Be Prepared for the Response: Engage with the feedback you receive. This is not just about hearing what you want to hear, but also about learning from diverse perspectives.

How to Take Feedback

1. Understand the Source: Make sure the feedback is coming from someone relevant to your request. A spouse might be supportive but not the best critic for your business website if they lack the perspective of your target audience.
2. Separate Yourself from Your Work: This can be challenging, especially for creatives and solopreneurs, but it’s crucial for growth.
3. Be Proactive: Do your research and ensure your work is as polished as possible before seeking feedback. This prevents basic questions that could have been answered with a little initiative.
4. Be Engaging: Respond thoughtfully to feedback. Ask follow-up questions and share how you’ve used the advice you’ve received. This respects the time of those who helped you and enriches the community.

Conclusion

Asking for feedback requires understanding both the context of your work and the perspectives of those you engage. Effective feedback is a tool for growth, illuminating blind spots and offering new paths forward. So, harness it wisely, and remember, every piece of feedback is a stepping stone to betterment.

Stay tuned for our next episode on giving feedback like a rock star, because mastering both sides of this process can dramatically enhance how we communicate and grow. Have a wonderful spring, and I’ll see you in a couple of weeks. Bye!

Summary:

Illana Burk, CEO of Your Life’s Workshop, shares insights on navigating the complexities of business ownership when it collides with real-life challenges in this episode of Good Business. She discusses the importance of preparing for and managing breaks, sharing personal experiences and lessons learned from her entrepreneurial journey.

Topics discussed:

Navigating Business Ownership and Real-Life Challenges

• Illana discusses how real-life events like having babies, caring for aging parents, mental health crises, trauma, grief, illness, and more can impact business ownership.
• She highlights the complexities of balancing personal and professional needs as a solo entrepreneur.

Preparing for a Pause and Managing Breaks

• Illana differentiates between planned and unplanned breaks and the challenges associated with each.
• She shares her experience of taking a maternity leave and the unexpected learnings from that break.
• The importance of planning, emotional support, and financial reserves during breaks is emphasized.

Lessons on Sustainable Scaling

• Illana delves into the concept of scaling sustainably, encouraging entrepreneurs to consider realistic growth based on personal capacities and life circumstances.
• She emphasizes the need to right-size scalability and prioritize what is truly sustainable for long-term success.

Building Emotional Support Networks

• The importance of having a support system that understands both personal and professional challenges is discussed.
• Illana advises on cultivating relationships with individuals who can provide meaningful support during difficult times.

Embracing Breaks and Limits

• Acknowledging personal limits and the inevitability of breaks is essential for long-term success.
• Illana encourages entrepreneurs to plan for breaks, adapt to changing conditions, and focus on sustainable growth strategies.

Key takeaways:

• Build revenue streams and financial reserves to navigate unplanned breaks.
• Share personal and professional challenges with supportive networks for emotional scaffolding.
• Prioritize sustainable scaling over rapid growth to ensure long-term success.
• Recognize personal limits and embrace breaks as necessary for continued growth and well-being.

References:

Your Life’s Workshop: Website

Hey everyone, and welcome back to The Good Business Podcast! I’m your host, Illana Burk.

Today, we’re diving into a common challenge faced by solo business owners: the pitfall of creating fantastic plans that hit a dead end because we haven’t considered our capacity to implement them.

Brainstorming is Fun, But What About Follow-Through?

Let’s face it, brainstorming sessions can be a blast. We toss around ideas, get excited, and feel like we’re making real progress. But for many solopreneurs, this is where the process stops. The focus becomes so much on generating ideas that we forget to ask ourselves a crucial question: “How am I actually going to make this happen?”

The Importance of Realistic Planning

Imagine you’re about to embark on a road trip. You’re excited, you’ve got your playlist queued up, and you’re ready to hit the open road. But there’s one key detail you haven’t considered: how much gas is in your tank? Without knowing where to refuel, your amazing road trip could come to a screeching halt much sooner than expected.

The same principle applies to business planning. We can dream up incredible ideas, but if we don’t have the resources (time, energy, budget) to bring them to life, our plans will remain just that – dreams.

Constraint Can Breed Opportunity

Now, I’m not suggesting we throw out all ambition. There’s a certain magic to “plowing ahead” with a big idea, even if it seems impossible. For large companies with vast resources, those seemingly impossible things can become reality.

But for solopreneurs, the key is to be realistic. We need to understand our limitations – the amount of time we can realistically dedicate, the financial resources we have available, and so on. By acknowledging these constraints, we can “right-size” our strategies and set achievable goals.

The Right-Sized Strategy: How to Avoid the Pothole

So, how do we avoid the “soul-crushing pothole” of constant disappointment and missed targets? Here are some key steps:

• Embrace the Uncomfortable: I know, it’s not always fun to confront our limitations. But by taking a hard look at our capacity, we can make informed decisions.
• Choose Your Battles: Not everything needs to be tackled right away. Identify what’s most important and focus your energy there.
• Make Strategic Sacrifices: There will be times when you need to scale back on certain areas to free up resources for your priorities.
• Plan with Open Eyes: Develop strategies that are realistic and achievable given your true capabilities.

The Downside of Ignoring Reality

Skipping this crucial step of considering our capacity can lead to some major problems down the road. Here’s what you might encounter:

• Misalignment with Your Network: Your grand plans might not take into account the needs and expectations of your clients, family, or collaborators.
• Setting Yourself Up to Fail: Creating plans that require unrealistic amounts of time or resources will inevitably lead to disappointment and a cycle of excuses.

Evolution at Your Pace: It’s a Marathon, Not a Sprint

Remember, growth is important, but it should be sustainable. There’s no need to burnout trying to reach the moon overnight. Recognize your limitations and build your business at a pace that works for you.

The Takeaway: Fuel Your Rocket Ship for Success

Imagine trying to build a rocket ship to fly to the moon, but you haven’t even checked the fuel tank. That’s essentially what we’re doing when we create elaborate plans without considering our resources.

Take the time to understand your capacity before you start strategizing. By doing so, you’ll set yourself up for success, not disappointment. And hey, if you do have the resources to go to the moon, then by all means, go for it! Just make sure you have a plan that gets you there.

Thanks for joining me on today’s episode! I look forward to seeing you next time.

Reaching a Milestone and Reframing Quitting

This episode marks the 60th of the podcast, a surprising milestone considering most podcasts fizzle out around episode 10. Illana celebrates this achievement and uses it to introduce the core theme: deciding when to stick with something or when to quit.

While societal pressure often pushes us to “finish everything,” quitting can be a valuable strategy. Illana references a previous episode exploring this concept and shares personal experiences with quitting.

Focus: Non-Client Business Initiatives

It’s important to clarify the specific context of this episode: evaluating when to quit non-client-related business initiatives. These are projects you undertake to promote yourself or your work, not projects directly tied to clients. Examples include unfinished books, podcasts with low listenership, or sporadic blog posts.

4 Core Questions for Evaluation

Illana outlines four key questions to guide your decision-making process:

1. Why did you start and what was the desired outcome? Aim for at least two areas of satisfaction (e.g., personal growth, financial gain) connected to your desired outcome. Having multiple areas of satisfaction provides better motivation during challenging phases. Consider aiming for three to four areas for increased resilience.

2. Why do you want to quit or stay? Be honest with yourself and verbalize your reasons. This can help identify underlying fears and self-doubt disguised as logical justifications. While fear and self-doubt are valid reasons to quit if overwhelming and detrimental to your mental health, self-awareness is crucial to avoid future regrets and starting new things. Illana offers guidance on how to constructively manage these emotions to learn and grow.

3. What are the tangible and intangible upsides of both options? Disregard the downsides for this exercise as they can be misleading and hinder clear decision-making. Instead, focus on identifying and comparing the upsides of quitting and staying. The list you find more appealing can offer valuable insights.

4. What do you actually want next in this area of your life? This straightforward question asks whether your progress aligns with your desired future. Even small progress can be significant if it leads towards your goals. Ultimately, continuing aligns with your initial desires and progress, while quitting signifies a misalignment.

Thanks for listening!