Manners Info

Why Manners required?

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Need of Manners :
The quality of social dealings would be of key value to the victory of individuals as well organizations and no one can underrate the value of good manners and behavior in the quality of social relationships.

Manners have no relation with riches or beauty. They need to be educated or learnt. If somebody has a pretty face it does not mean that he needs neither brainpower nor manners. Riches too do not authorize someone to be rude. Basic manners training should really be inculcated at home by parents during early days.

Manners can be learnt by anyone with or without learning experience, with or without classroom education. keep in mind good manners do matter.

Growth of personal affairs

Gaining respect of our peers

Finding better jobs

Seeking support to others

Feeling better and respected by your children and wife

Feeling more confident

Feeling relaxed with people from other cultures

Avoiding embarrassment

Feeling better about yourself

Written Communication Manners

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Manners for Written Communication :

It is important to know what you want to say before starting to write. Make sure that you are aware that any piece of writing can be used as evidence against or for you. Make sure that you don’t write anything that could be manipulated or held against you at any time.

Write the letter with a pen in dark ink and not with the pencil. Never typewrite any social note or a personal letter. If you are not sure that your writing is readable, try writing each alphabet separately in capital letters.

Proof read the letter before sending. Especially check for misspellings and other language mistakes.

Write the date on the letter at top or at the end of a hand-written letter.

Always close a letter with a wish.

Conversation Manners

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Manners for Conversation :

Remember that effective communication is a two-way process. It includes both ‘giving’ and ‘taking’. No communication could be effective if it carries just one aspect.

Don’t talk when listening is more important. Don’t put people off by continuing talking about you and your achievements.

Never assume that others see what you see and they know and realize what you know and realize, unless it is proved.

Solutions mostly lie in asking and not in telling. Learn to ask and learn more than you tell.

Never repeat yourself unless asked by others. Every time something is repeated, it loses interest of some more people.

Never interrupt a speaker even if you have already heard something unless he/she asks you.

Learn to listen and you will develop more friends than those who like to talk.

Avoid saying anything that will not be acceptable to others or will make other feel bad, as much as possible.

Effective speaking skills and good humor do wonders. However, you must understand that decent humor is different from dirty jokes.

In conversation, use positive statements and words. You do not have to fire everything that comes to your mouth. Learn to ignore things. Learn to disagree without being disagreeable.

Never criticize, ridicule or blame people. If you must, find the right time and opportunity. Do not be personal; criticize the behavior, not the person.

Start a conversation with the things you agree on before talking about the ones you do not. Remember, everyone is hungry of praise and appreciation.

Be humble and modest if you want to be popular in the society. A successful man is he who makes his listeners feel successful.

Never speak too fast or too loud. Pitch and tone of voice matters as much as the pace of your voice does. Your language must be sweet and gentle.

Make calls at a convenient time. Look for others’ convenience, not yours. Be starting to talk about an important matter, always ask if it it right time to discuss it. Keep the conversation as brief as possible.

All the manners you observe in a conversation also apply during a telephone call like starting conversation with greetings and introduction, keeping the communication brief, being polite and gentle, being clear and precise, and ending the conversation on a positive note and a wish.

While ordering food at a restaurant, make sure to double-check your order or instructions. Remember that if you do not do so, you will also be responsible for any damages or confusion that might occur due to miscommunication.

If you served wrongly by a service person, do not criticize him/her aloud. Remember that no one intentionally likes to disserve. While telling the person as to what you ordered and what you got, keep your voice low and do not be rude.

Dress Manners

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Dress and Dressing Up Manners :

Good clothes are considered a ticket to decent places. However you must know that only dressing elegantly and fashionably without the right posture, confidence, right manners will not serve.

Shoes constitute and important part of the overall dress. Keep them shinny clean all the times.

Keep your undergarments clean and change them everyday.

Wear your dress according to the occasion.

Be extraordinary careful about your socks and stockings. You never know when and where you might have to take your shoes off. Nothing damages the personality of a person than torn socks or stockings with holes.

Clothes must always be clean, stain-free and properly pressed.

Make-up helps us look naturally beautiful. Don’t overdo to the extent it looks artificial.

Nothing justifies dirty or disordered hair. A style is good if it can keep your hair neat and tidy throughout the day with a minimum effort.

If you dye your hair, choose a color which matches your original hair color. Changing a color of your hair frequently is not appreciable.

Take extra care of all those parts of your body, which stay exposed to direct light and sun, e.g hands, face, hair, feet.

Put more effort in becoming and staying slim and trim. Spend sometimes daily in walking and doing household work yourself.

It is decent and smart to wear loose-fit dresses over a trim and slim body than wearing tight dresses over a fat and a plumpy body.

Parents and Relatives Manners

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Parents and Relatives Manners :

Learn to respect and treat your wife’s parents as you treat your own.

Parents should not hinder in the marital life of their children unless they are asked for it.

Parents should respect privacy of their children once they grow up or get married.

Treat your son or daughter-in-law as your children. Never criticize. If you must communicate something, say it indirectly.

Do not talk against your son or daughter-in-law to your own daughter or son. If he/she complains to you regarding his/her wife, coach him/her.

If your are an adult or a married person and want to live with your parents, make sure that you don’t become a burden. Agree on monthly expenses and pay it to them sincerely. If they refuse to take it, buy food stuff or do other things for them at least equal to the amount you are saving by living with them. Ask your parents as to how you can help them in reducing or at least sharing the extra burden caused by you and or your family. Respect their rules and regulations and live with them. Buy them gifts or take them to a dinner party or bring them food.

All your family relations deserve a special treatment including in-laws, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, cousins etc. Maintain and nurture your family ties. Spend a part of your income on the welfare of relatives. Host some family events occasionally to make stronger your ties.

Be available to your relatives in their difficult times. If you have some poor relatives, offer your economic help as much as you can afford without being asked for it.

Take care of your relatives as you would want your children to do. If you are not nice to your relatives, your children will also toe the line.

Manners for Behaving with Children

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Dealing with Children :

Manners you teach your children slowly become their values and morals and finally the character. Parents must illustrate all the manners they like their children to learn. Children always learn what they see you doing. Never do anything in the presence of your children which you would not like them to do.

Make sure that you watch only those movies or read only those books at home that you don’t mind your kids watching or reading. Bring your children good movies and books. Make sure to teach your children all the good manners.

Mother play a primary role for the training of children for she is closer to them and also spends more time with them than the father. Father should be friendly to children and mother firm where required. Children must also be trained by mother to do their own work, e.g. cleaning up their room, closet and toys. If they are not taught this in their early days, they will always think it to be somebody else’s job to clean up their room and make up their bed etc.

Convince and Support your children to participate in additional activities in their school. Be there when they invite you. Never do anything in the school that embarrasses your children. Treat well with their teachers, school property or their friends.

Go with your kids while buying their clothing and ask them about their selection. If their selection is not good, explain it to them why you want them to buy what you want them to buy.

Clarify to your children as to how should they call your parents, friends, colleagues, neighbors etc. Don’t let them decide it by themselves.

Coach your children the basic procedure of covering their bodies, wearing underpants etc. as well as you teach them the use of toilet.

Parents should not oppose each other in the presence of kids. If children notice a difference of views, a lack of communication between their parents, they will start taking unnecessary advantage of the situation.

Teach your children to help parents in household work. However, make sure you give them some choice.

Make sure that you treat your kids’ friends well and never criticize them in front of your children. If you must, criticize them in private.

Train your children the importance, the art and skills of maintaining and nurturing family ties. Instead of talking against your relatives to your children, give them the skills to successfully handle various tough situations and relatives.

Manners for Accommodation, Furnishing and Decoration

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Accommodation, Furnishing and Decoration Manners :

Things should always be in placed where they belong. Everything you have in your home should be dirt-free.

Keep your toilets and bathrooms separate and don’t build them too close to your bedrooms as much as possible. Use different slippers for the toilet and bathroom and don’t use them in the house.

Always left the bathroom clean and dry. Immediately after the use, wipe it off. Meals should be taken in the dining room or the dinning mat.

Wash your undergarments yourself and train your children to do the same.

When some guests staying with you, provide them with a separate room and bedding. Spend sometimes with them showing their bedroom, bathroom and toilet. Give them a tour of the house, including kitchen, lawns. Tell them where to make a tea/coffee if they would like to make it.

Guest room must be decorated well up to your bedroom standard. The same goes for the bathroom.

Use one room for changing clothes. Put all the items in their place.

Spending Manners

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Manners for Spending :

Generous spending or spending it on unnecessary items is like wasting the money. While shopping, make sure that you shop for your requirements and satisfaction, not to impress others.

Do your grocery shopping monthly or weekly. This will save your money and fuel. The more you visit superstores, the more unnecessary expense you will incur. Make two lists of monthly grocery items, i.e one for perishables i.e fresh vegetables, fruits, eggs, bread, milk, meat etc and the other for non-perishables i.e soaps, detergents, shampoos, sodas, sauces, jams, bought monthly from the wholesale market, whereas the perishable items could be bought weekly. If you do so, you will observe that your monthly bill has reduced significantly.

Most of people having the habit of buying everything they see without even taking a minute to decide if it is required or not? Before buying make sure that the thing, Do you need it? Is it beautiful, in look, color, shape etc? Is it suitable for the place you are considering buying it for? If you observe these few guidelines, you will see spending and shopping halved.

Travel and Journey Manners

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Manners for Travelling

When you are required to travel out of city for an extensive period, clear all your debts and guide your spouse or leave a note with her or a close friend about who owes you what and what you owe to others.

Plan and budget travel expense and leave room for any emergency situation.

It is better to plan a joint travel. Traveling together with friend makes it much easier and safer. It also provides an matchless opportunity to be good friends and make new friends, Do not waste this opportunity.

Propose a person as a leader during traveling and let him take care of all the payments.

Buy your tickets and reserve your room in hotels at least three or four weeks in advance.

Buy decent, presentable and durable suitcases. Your belongings as well as your dress say a lot about you.

Make sure to travel with little luggage. However a first-aid medical kit and a few good books are always good companion.

Put an evident mark on your luggage to identify it and do not pick up any luggage unless you are sure it is yours.

Do not carry your wallet with the travel documents. Carry your travel documents with you while traveling.

Dress comfortably but properly while traveling.

Take little coffee and tea with light food and reduce smoking during travel.

While going by Air, keep your seat belts fastened all the time, and make sure that your children are also secure.

Never behave flight attendant as your personal servant. Remember he/she has to serve many other passengers as well.

While traveling to a strange city, always reach there in daylight. Arriving at the airport at midnight in strange city could be quite a disturbing experience.

Manners, courtesy and politeness is your biggest benefit in any strange country. It can get you through many challenging situations very easily.

After arriving at the hotel, before you unpack your luggage check the locks at the door and the windows. Keep windows and door locked at night, curtains down and don’t forget to display the “Don’t Disturb” sign on the door.

When you are in possession of cash or jewelry, never display it to the room-service staff. Never leave anything costly in the room. Use the lockers available at hotels. However, it is good to carry credit cards or travel checks, instead of cash.

Be polite with the staff and other guests but never share personal information with them.

Respect the culture, customs, heritage and the public property of the places you visit.

Label your luggage bags with full name, address and contact details.

Hardships and Afflictions

Never cry or share your trouble with anyone. It is better to report your matter with the respective authorities i.e police etc.

If somebody inquires about your job or health, never take it as an chance to blow out your miseries and complaints.

Cleanliness - Personal Matters

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Cleanliness Manners : Taking Care of Your body and Own Cleanliness

Take care of your body and love it. A fit body is slim, smart and fat-free body. Make yourself attractive; maintain the original pose and shape of your body and color of the skin, with healthy diet, daily exercise, weekly body, facial and head massage, removing unnecessary hair from nose, ears, and underarms. This the best gift for your body. Women must also clean their face, legs and arms by removing unnecessary hairs. Everything looks good on a healthy and a smart body. Use natural oils and herbs to wash your hair and skin.

Washing and Bathing

Do not use too hot or too cold water for bathing. Use body temperature water to take a bath. If you sweat more than normal, take a bath twice or thrice a day and use good bath soap, preferably with antibacterial ingredients.

If you stay in air-conditioned environment preventing sweating, it is necessary that you take steam bath once or twice a month.

Rest and Sleep

Do not sleep in undergarments and wear loose-fitted dress before you sleep.

Never take more than one pillow to sleep and do not sleep on a bed. It may bend your neck bone and your posture will not remain straight.

Waking Up

Before you leave your bedroom, change your night dress and fold your bed.