Marketing, Finance & Obama

Your comments are all spam

2011-01-22T10:34:00.003-05:00

I really miss being able to whine in paragraphs instead of Tweets, so I'm going to get back to blogging. Except I really hate it that 90% of the comments I get are spam. I really don't want to make people register to comment, cause that sucks, but I'm sick of moderating comments all day. Any of you have advice to fix this?

First one to comment gets a free ebook!

Backyards & Bottles is now Open!

2010-10-18T12:16:00.003-04:00

My wife opened her new store selling wine accessories best suited for outside events like tailgates, bbqs, outdoor concerts, etc... In other words, all the things we love. Please go check out her facebook page and "like" her.

Big Fake Numbers Aren't News

2010-06-27T21:49:00.003-04:00

Dear CNN,

If you really have no idea how many gallons have spilled into the Gulf, so much so that you ask the user to provide the inputs, then a real-time tracker on your home page is probably not warranted.

Sincerely,

Jamie

Blizzard Mount Generates $125 MM in Free Revs

2010-04-16T12:45:00.004-04:00

Well, Blizzard finally did it. They decided to let loose the reigns, and let The Man (you know, the suits at Activision) make some freaking money. And How.

If you are one of the gazillion World Of Warcraft players out there, you can now spend $25 on an in-game mount (pictured). Apparently, these are limited to only 5,000,000 though, so you better get on it.

And for the non-suits out there, that's $125 Million dollars in revenue, for something that has $0 marginal cost. HOLY SHIT!

McDonalds Filet O Fish Campaign Pretty Much Kicks Ass

2010-04-12T11:20:00.003-04:00

You know that McDonald's Filet 'o Fish ad where there dudes are in the truck and that one guy is jammin out to the filet 'o fish song?... Of course you do, cause it's awesome.

Some evidence on the awesomeness:

1) I was at a piano bar Saturday night and they played the song - everyone loved it

2) Every time I hear my phone vibrate, I start singing the song... that's right, I've been hypnotized by a commercial and now sing the filet o fish song whenever my phone buzzes

Marketing Winzors teh day! Hooray PS3

2010-04-09T16:34:00.003-04:00

You know why I hate marketing (even though it's my job)? Because even when the PS3 just reduced it's size to something fairly neat, it almost has a decent online interface and Netflix connection, Blu Ray is gaining some steam, and they have finally hit the $299 point.

The marketing geniuses at Sony are giving all the sales credit to... Kevin Butler.

O, FFS.

I got one of them there QR Codes

2010-03-31T14:52:00.004-04:00

Have you seen these things in magazine ads or maybe some stories/ads you see on the internet? I do internet marketing for a living, so I see them a lot. I finally decided to get myself one - maybe I'll put it on a T-shirt or something, so people know for sure that I'm a pretty big deal (read: dork).

Search Engine Land explains what a QR Code is and why you need one, so I won't.

I got mine at http://www.qurify.com/en/ - free and very simple, and didn't have to give them personal stuff.

Oh, and if you want to scan that badboy and see what it does, send your iPhone over here.

SPOILERS: It links to my Twitter account.

Farmville Is Actually Quite Innovative, At Making Money

2010-03-11T22:01:00.003-05:00

I saw some Tweet today containing a Social Gaming Presentation from GDC tonight. Of course, a lot of very big impressive numbers, such as Farmville has 80 million players in the US.

Well, what really impressed me was the marketing innovation. They have some in game currency that they sell (cool business model really - in game money costs Farmville makers Zynga nothing, and yet they sell a bunch of it to 80 million folks). No, this isn't innovation. The fact that they'll also give you some credits if you respond to affiliate marketing offers, now that's impressive. Yup, sign up for a credit card in game and instead of 25,000 miles, you'll get 300 cow-credits. Nutty, eh?

Anyways, more on my game-blog, if you are interesting.

Steve Ballmer and your Google Profile are both Awesome!

2010-03-03T12:51:00.004-05:00

It's only barely day 2 of SMX West and I've already learned a ton about search marketing, the internet, and life in general.

First off, Steve Ballmer is kind of loud and sometimes a bit aggressive, but he's also awesome. He's very funny and his candor was enlightening to say the least. Ballmer hinted about his secret Twitter profile which now has the internet buzzed then instantly bored (it's devoted to his son's basketball team). Also, Microsoft isn't buying Facebook or Twitter today, but he didn't rule it out for tomorrow. Of course, he also talked about this whole Google Buzz privacy issue and Microsoft's take on it (basically, he's not taking sides, but it didn't sound like he minds when they get into trouble). He even polled the audience to see if any of us were peeved at Google, but asking a bunch of SEOs if they are pissed at Google is like asking day-traders if they hate the stock market. Sure, they hate it, but not as much as they love it. After all, Google is a black box, but it's a black box full of MONEY!!

That leads me to the Google Profile discussion (my Google profile if you are interested). If you don't know what it is, go check it out. Basically, this is a portal to my life. If you ever need to interview me for a job, that's where you should start. Now I know some folks are privacy freaks (especially since the Google Buzz breakdown), but I'm not. I'm an open book. Honestly, this is mostly because that's just the way of the world. I could fight it, and you could still find all of that stuff really easily. So, I embrace it. And if you have your own business, you should love it, cherish it, give it flowers everyday and always say "I love you" before bed.... Why?

Well, here's what those crazy folks at Google do behind the scenes. First, it takes all of those networks and contacts and adds them into their black box full of money. All those fans of yours on Facebook, all those folks who follow you, those Google Buzz contacts who stalk you now, all those friends, are suddenly thrown into the box. So, you sell wine? Now when those fans of yours Googles for a red that pairs with steak, your site has moved from 500th to 10th. You provide consulting on merchandising, well, that network is now in the box too, so when your buddy's, buddy's buddy on Twitter searchers for a place to blow $250 an hour on advice, BOOM, there you are. Enjoy your wonderful organic super-fertilizer. And your mommy-blog, well, you'll be the envy of the entire PTA as you'll have more followers than the middle school!

Yes, it is a very scary thing, this Google. I don't blame you for instantly shutting your profile off, especially if you are still hiding from that college ex. But, if you are a business, your Google Profile represents you in the box. The more your put into the Google black box, the more money you get to take out!

Spirit Airlines Really Thinking Of The Box

2010-02-02T18:30:00.002-05:00

Sorry, I couldn't resist the headline. Nope, that wasn't a typo. That was irresponsible of me. Of course, this is just a tiny little blog, not worried about a corporate reputation, not worried about longterm brand impacts, and frankly, not really trying to sell a thing. So, basically I am everything that Spirit Airlines is not. And yet, Spirit Airlines thought that a sweet Muff Diving email campaign was a good idea.

Frankly, when I see companies doing this, I assume they are going down.

Do You Trust Amazon?... (The 21st Century Wal-Mart)

2010-01-21T14:27:00.004-05:00

Well, I for one am bummed. I love Amazon.com. It is generally my first stop for shopping. I generally feel like they provide great customer service and super pricing. And I generally find that I trust them, an odd emotion to attach to a retailer. After today, though, my trust is waning.

Today I heard that Amazon.com was doing some "Lightning Deals" on some fairly hot video games, including Assassin's Creed 2. This went on super lightning deal sale at 12pm EST, which I heard about from a friend. However, when I went to the site, the price was still the same. I figured, hmm, crappy sale. But no, it turned out (as you can see in the picture) that you would get a different price if you knew where to look. Let me say that again:

Amazon.com has different prices for the exact same items, depending on where on the site you find it!

This is bad news... How will I ever be sure that I'm paying a good price when I shop at Amazon? What if there's a deal going on I can't find? What if there's another sub-site I just simply don't know about?... Not only is this bad for pricing, but it's just plain terrible customer service. Given the fair pricing laws out there, it may also be illegal (as less savvy consumers skew towards protected demographics).

Amazon, knock out this amateur hour BS. You are better than this.

10 Top Costco Sucks And I'm Not Going To Take It... ANYMORE!!!

2010-01-11T15:56:00.003-05:00

Costco has earned it's way onto the list of places that I won't go to even if I will save a ton of money. Now that list includes Costco and Wal-mart. Wal-mart I think everyone gets. You sacrifice customer service and sanity to save a bunch of money. But at Costco, they charge you money to shop there. This should mean that you don't have to sacrifice on service, and when you shop there, it should not make you want to kill people. Since I went there for 10 minutes yesterday and got so mad I had to leave, I'll share this note to the world. Costco is awful, and here are 10 reason why.

Top 10 reasons why Costco Sucks:

10. The parking lot at the one I go to is crooked. So you have to weave in and out of cars to go from your car to the door. Stoopid!

9. The greeter is generally an a-hole who doesn't do anything other than pretend to look for membership cards

8. They are always out of carts

7. The produce is AWFUL!!!... I saved a ton of money on green peppers, sure, but who cares if you open the bag up and they are all beat up. What is it you are doing to these freaking things?

6. The selection is terrible… Give me a break, does every person that shops at Costco all wear the same type of deodorant, or is it just me?

5. Where are the walnuts!?

4. Do you like zombies? Cause if you do, I know where to find some. They are slowly pushing a cart down the middle of every isle at every Costco on earth. Don't worry, though, these zombies won't eat you. All they will do is impeed you from being able to push your cart by, forcing you to stare at the 30 pound bag of jalepeno poppers for what seems like hours, wishing you had done a better job on last years resolutions, so this years resolutions wouldn't result in your inability to devour jalepeno poppers. CRAP!

3. Again, I'm paying you to shop here?... Why? The prices aren't that good (do the math on that 37 pack of 9 ounce Cokes - I promise you'll be kicking yourself for a year) and customer service is simply non-existant.

2. Costco also sucks relatively speaking, because grocery stores have started sucking a lot less. The prices are really coming down. I highly recommend you check out a Safeway if you haven't been in a while. The quality is top notch on everything and the prices are fairly decent. Also, if you are near an employee, instead of acting like you are either invisible or a burden to their existance, they'll say something pleasant like "can I help you find anything?" or "have a nice day". It's refreshing.

1. The lines at check-out are absolutely dehumanizing. I feel like I must be in line to pay for something absolutely awesome like Space Mountain, or to see a 2-headed bearded lady. But no, I'm in line to pay for my effing groceries. Holy crap I feel dumb.

Stay Away!

Harrah's Total Rewards is the Best, Customer Service is SUCKS

2009-10-09T13:07:00.006-04:00

I'm a big-time follower of loyalty products and loyalty marketing. I think rewards programs are a great way to keep customers coming back, or from straying too far. I love my Starwood Amex, and almost always stay at Starwood properties. When they won't take Amex, my Chase Freedom VISA Sig gets all of my spending. Both cards have very valuable earn/burn ratios, and great customer service when it is necessary, though that is rare. Of course, there are other types of rewards programs out there, of which the one I'm most familiar with is for Casinos. I'm a member of almost all of the programs, and was very interested today to see what the industry considers the best. According to some article in AdAge (referenced here by Colloquy, something I actually read), Harrah's Total Rewards program is the best in the casino business. That's great for Harrah's, and it should be great for me since I'm a member. The problem is, the other parts of Harrah's customer relationship model is completely F'd.

Here's a quick summary of my experience when we were comped at the Caesar's Palace in Atlantic City, in the Spring of 2009 (note, about the bottom of the economy). I'm going to go with bullet points, so maybe it's easier to read:

So, when we get there and check in, they tell us that we were not booked at Caesar's after all, instead we were at Bally's, a couple doors down. No biggie, it is close.
Bally's... is a shithole
As we walk from Caesar's to Harrah's to Bally's (all the same company), we attempt to play table games with a mixed set of Harrah's chips. They tell us they can only accept from the casino we are at. At one point, I have to get a manager because we had taken a cab from another Harrah's joint and didn't want to pay $60 and an hour of our time to turn my $500 into playable chips. Eventually I said something to the effect of "I'm not walking away until you cash these chips, I'm going to go play these and lose them again, just make it happen"... The guy eventually collapsed. My guess is that this is a breakage strategy (don't cash chips, people leave with chips, we pocket the money).... This is basically the ultimate "screw you customers" of customer service.
My wife was winning and getting real excited about it at the Roulette table. They decided she must have been intoxicated (though she wasn't) and told her that she was cut off from free drinks because they "practice responsible gambling"... Of course, they didn't cut her off from actual gambling. Ridiculous.
On the day of check out, we asked for an extra hour. They told us every half hour we stayed past check out would cost us $50. Again, remember, they had comped us! Why give us 3 free nights and then treat us in such a manner that we wouldn't go back if they paid us!!

It was so bad we were thinking about complaining to every one and their mothers. But then we decided why bother? It was so bad we didn't want anything free from them. No more comped rooms or shitty buffets, so what's the point? I think maybe I'll still crash there for free every now and then, but my ass will be at a chair in the Borgota when it comes to gambling.

So, good job Harrah's Total Rewards - It must be nice to have such a rewarding program. Too bad everything else about your loyalty model sucks ass. These are easy things to fix. Start to care about your customers, all of them. Make it a place worth staying. Don't treat us like scum. Break your breakage models. If you are loyal to me, I'll be loyal to you.

ESPN360 Finally Works on Comcast!

2009-10-03T10:48:00.004-04:00

Comcast has finally allowed ESPN360, the home of all sports, to work with their cable network. I wonder how many customers their delay cost them... I was on the verge of switching to FIOS myself - guess this will save them a couple months.

Anyways, Hokies come on at noon. I'll be in the bar with my tiny laptop and a large beer. Hooray beer.

You're Invited to My Windows 7 Launch Party!!

2009-09-17T13:45:00.002-04:00

OMG... I must be the luckiest guy ever. I got selected to host a Windows 7 Launch Party at my house!! Come one, come all, it's time to get our Windows 7 on... I mean, look how much fun this is going to be (shit, the guy at the computer obviously hasn't had this much fun since Windows 2000 came out).

Here's 5 things that came to mind when I read this email:

1) What the fuck?!

2) Every person in this picture should be ashamed of themselves (despite their amazing acting abilities)

3) Someone needs to tell Microsoft that an operating system is not a Wii

4) If I invited my friends over to my Windows 7 launch party, I'd no longer have any friends

5) How many of these people are white in the European version?

By the way, I heard that Windows 7 is pretty good. Maybe they should advertise the product instead.

What does this look like?

2009-09-17T10:31:00.002-04:00

Keurig Coffee Makers Kick So Much Ass

2009-09-12T13:52:00.003-04:00

So, my loving parents in law got me a super-sweet Keurig coffee maker for my birthday. This is definitely the coolest thing I own that doesn't allow me to play Peggle on it. It makes rad coffee without any wait, mess, and even better, no clean up. As my mother-in-law was skeptical about said Keurig coffee maker and its awesomeness, I made her a video demonstration. If you've never seen one of these in action, get ready for a treat.

Enjoy!

Las Vegas is in Recession - Mandalay Bay Sucks

2009-08-28T12:11:00.004-04:00

So, haven't posted in a while. Yah, I know. I'm busy and have Premier League and La Liga to watch. Anyways, I'm in Vegas right now (YAY!), and man, things are rough here. I'm at Mandalay Bay, where, last night we had to get a manager over to get a $10 shot comped, and now I'm having a $4 coffee and $9 berries at the cafe. Apparently, Wifi isn't free here. Instead it's $525.00 dollars (!!!)

I'm guessing that's a typo. Either way, I talked to the manager and they don't offer free Wifi, even to paying customers in the restaurant who are staying at the hotel and are gold premier plus diamond level in loyalty, which I am. In the era of perfect information and unlimited choice, customer service will win the day. Mandalay Bay, get it together man!

Blame Your Government For AIG Bonuses

2009-03-18T13:05:00.005-04:00

I know everyone likes to think that the big evil corporate monsters at AIG are to blame for this $165 million in bonus payouts. And, certainly, the executives at AIG a year ago were responsible for these decisions. Contracts were made that guaranteed certain valuable employees incentives for sticking around, during a time where they all knew the ship was sinking. The governement and the media wants you to think this was corporate greed gone wild, the government and the media thinks you are a sheep, and will follow them down whatever road they tell you to. Don't blame AIG, blame your governement!

I'll keep this relatively short and sweet, cause I know most people don't like to read, they just like hearing soundbites on CNN, so here's what you need to know:

The government took AIG over more than half a year ago. When you take over a company, you do something called dilligence, which includes reading contracts. Instead of reading contracts, politicians have almost daily press conferences where they tear into corporate executives on national television, in hopes of keeping constiuents happy. They had six months to read these contracts, and they've failed. So now they continue to grandstand in hopes of allaying the blame. Don't be fooled by their rhetoric.

AIG guaranteed these bonuses as a chance to survive an extra year. Without these people, they'd have lost experts in the field of very complicated derivatives, and sales people with long-term client relationships that would have been dissolved. It is likely that this $165 MM (only 0.1% of total taxpayer investment) has saved AIG and the taxpayers TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS in losses they could have seen after wiping out their good talent.

The government's threats (Chuck Schumer, you thieving douchebag) of taxing all of the bonuses at 100% is STEALING. This is the equivolent of the owner of your company taking back 100% of your salary which they were contractually obligated to pay. Don't let these corrupt bastards steal from your fellow citizens. The government could have easily prevented this through dilligence, which they failed to do… why?...

Because democracy has resulted in a bunch of corrupt, greedy, incompetant politicians pandering to the needs of constituents in hopes of more years of power, money, and dillusions of grandeaur. Our governement doesn't get the simplest of concepts - Due Dilligence, Investment In Competent People, DO NOT STEAL!!! How on earth do people continue to cast blame on the corporations… cause remember, it was the government officials who took bribes and removed necessary regulations. Isn't that worse than greedy CDSs?

I'll leave you on this note - Here's the list of top AIG recipients for the 2008 campaign:

1. Sen. Chris Dodd (Senate Banking Finance Chairman), D-Conn., $103,100

2. Sen. Barack Obama (President), D-Ill., $101,332

3. Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., $59,499

4. Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-N.Y., $35,965

Dancing With The Stars is a Democracy, what we're seeing is fat pigs playing poker on the farm.

Home Depot - The New Nordstrom's of Customer Service!?

2009-03-09T12:22:00.003-04:00

I cannot remember very many times when a company big enough to be a component of the Dow Jones has done something I'd consider remarkable. I guess it's remarkable that Citibank managed to depress their shares under a dollar last week. It's certainly remarkable that GM has lasted as long as they have with such a horrible product and business model. But at a time when business isn't exactly booming, Home Depot has become remarkable, for all the right reasons. Home Depot has completely revolutionized customer service at a hardware store, and is now offering the best customer service in all of retail.

"WHAT - are you CRAZY!?!?"

I know, I'm completely blown away as well. Less than one year ago, my wife and I decided never to go back there unless it was something we simply couldn't buy somewhere else. At a time when I was unemployed, we decided we'd rather spend money at the expensive local joint, than give money to the likes of Home Depot, a retail chain we were convinced was committed to having the worst customer service on earth. Never enough people working. The few employees who were there were miserable and surrounded by hoards of customers, awaiting an answer for the simplest of questions which would often time go unanswered. The prices were good, but at what cost? Every single time I went there, I got pissed. Often times leaving a full basket in the middle of an ilse and storming out with a flurry of curses blanketing everyone I saw on the way out (under my breath).

Now, the pendulum has swung completely the other direction… Now honestly, I'm not sure if this is a regional test, or a national effort. I'm hoping for the latter. Also, I've had this experience consistantly for the past few months at several area stores (DC), so I think it's legit. Basically, when you walk in, there is a greeter who can point you in the right direction. Yesterday, however, they didn't know the answer. But, they actually tracked down the person who could for me. That person then took me to the exact item I was looking for. And during the walk, instead of telling me "I hate you - die - I have real work to do" they instead said "How is your day?... Are you enjoying the weather?"… What?... Then they said, "what else?", offering to take me to whatever was next, which they happily did. Yes, Home Depot has given me the kind of customer service I'd only expect from a local shop, and really only by the owner… Oh, and they had plenty of registers open, so I didn't waste any time.

Home Depot will be getting all of my business, not only for any tools I need, but for ANYTHING I can buy there. Tools, garbage bags, light bulbs, whatever. I ask that if Home Depot is on your "no way, no how" list, you give them another chance. Offering this level of customer service takes a big increase in staff and training, meaning this is a big investment that can blow up on them if it fails. The only way that companies will treat us like this is if they make money doing it, so let's help them prove the business case for customer service. Maybe customer service isn't just a thing of the past, but the value differentiator of the future. Take that, internet retailers!

American Express Pays $300 For Best Customers To Leave

2009-02-25T17:43:00.004-05:00

File this one into the nominations box for the highly coveted "Worst Business Decision of The Year Award." -- I'd say only Gatorade's rebranding to "G" has a shot of beating American Express on this one... Maybe. So, here's the scoop, American Express has decided to pay a bunch of it's best customers $300 bucks to leave. That's right... they are giving customers a $300 gift card to peace out. Good thinking, AMEX, that's one way to reduce the ole portfolio.

Ok, we all know what they are doing here. They are trying to entire some of their riskier customers (those revolving a balance and not making any purchases) to close up shop and move out. Of course, the problem is, the people who really are in trouble aren't going to be able to pay off their balance and move on with life. Nope, only the people with liquidity can do that... you know, the kind of people that AMEX would actually like to keep as customers?... DUH!

Adding an insult (to your intelligence) to injury (their business), AMEX company spokeswoman Faust, says:

"The intention is to help cardholders lower their debt and encourage responsible management of their credit," says Ms. Faust. It's being promoted as a means for customers to "simplify their finances."

Wow, that's freaking rich. AMEX is simply trying to help customers lower their debt and be more fiscally resonsible. A little odd, however, since AMEX has a big, fat fiduciary duty to their stock-holders, and no such duty to customers. I think it's far more likely they were just trying to get rid of deadbeats before they became charged-off deadbeats. Seems a lot more likely, eh?

To be fair, AMEX could simply just close all those accounts and not give out the $300 bucks. Guess they didn't want the bad PR. Irony is some funny shit.

But I will say, also, the Credit Card pictured above is the absolute best rewards card in world if you travel (and don't revolve balances). Extremely rich rewards.

Dilbert's Dogbert - Keeping It Real!!

2009-02-25T09:56:00.003-05:00

I can't tell you how many times I've screamed this at my tv in the last 3 months. Thanks Mr. Dogbert, we love you!

Please Pay Your Bills

2009-02-16T10:00:00.001-05:00

Dear Consumers,

I realize that the economy sucks. Many of us had a large portion of our net worth wiped out in the last 18 months. For some, that was a 45% haircut to their investment accounts, IRAs and 401Ks. For others, it may be a 30-40% paper loss on their house. There are those who took a job they were overqualified for, or underpaid, just to make sure they can pay the bills. And there are those, most unfortunately, who are still unemployed in a job market that may be the worst any of us have ever seen. I've certainly experienced a lot of this myself, and it isn't fun.

However, I am now becoming fearful. Not fearful that things won't turnaround anytime soon, because, honestly, I already have chalked that up as a given. What I am fearful of is a cultural shift. A complete lacking of accountability and responsibility that we've just never seen as a nation. President Obama, who I do like tremendously, has spoken far too often of 8 years of poor leadership and an uncontrolled, greedy Wall St. that forced exotic mortgages to the unsuspecting masses. Yes, corporate leadership at the big banks looked the other way. There was an opportunity to generate loans and profits at rates never seen before. CEOs and executives racked up millions (some even billions) in bonuses and stock appreciation, with very little penalty when things blew up.

While these are probably true, we, as people, simply can not wash our hands of all the blame. We all knew, KNEW, that you shouldn't take out a mortgage for a home you can't put 20% down on. That's how it always was, and probably always should be. We all knew, KNEW, that house appreciation has always barely outpaced inflation, and anything materially in excess of that is a bubble. We knew 25 year olds shouldn't be home owners, and most certainly shouldn't be land lords. And lastly, we knew... we knew... we knew... that taking out 2nd mortgages, option ARMs, and god forbid, negative amortization mortgages, were all ridiculously risky...

But, we signed on the dotted line anyways. We had the fever. Mr Jones' house was up 20% last year, and already 20% this year. We have to get in on that action!! We can't miss out!! Well, as we've seen before, bubbles always pop. Always.

Now don't get me wrong. I'm not only a Bubble president, but I'm also a client... I worked for the very institutions that invented CDSs, option ARMs, negative amortization, and the 3rd lien. I also invested in them, salivating for the profits that these instruments would generate. Furthermore, I purchased a home in my 20's (thanks 80/15/5!!), and even purchased one last year without yet even having a job (also 80/15/5... YAY!!)... How arrogant. How stupid... How GREEDY!!!

But I've learned my lesson. Hopefully we've all learned our lesson. A negative savings rate in the US is what has caused China to grow at 7-9% every year for years. A negative savings rate isn't something the government can cause through failed policies and it isn't something Wall St. can create through exotic financial smoke and mirrors. Nope, the only one who can spend your money (my money) is you (and me). It was our fault... "our bad"... oops. Shame on us.

That being said. There are two ways out of this.

1) "It was the bank's fault... they should have never overextended me so much credit... It was the government's fault... they should have had better laws to protect me. I'm not paying my bills. Screw them... Let them foreclose... I'll just go rent a luxury condo for some great price, because the owner is equally screwed. So what if my credit score goes down? Better than eating a $100K loss on my house!!"

Yes, I hear you. I've thought these very things. The problem with this is, if everyone does it, housing prices will absolutely collapse (like, another 75%). Banks and other companies with large Accounts Receivable will all go bankrupt. The government will no longer be able to save us, as government debt will lose it's AAA rating. The government will have to pay at higher rates, with money they are printing (not like taxes are paying for this - a workforce with 10-15% unemployment certainly can't afford a tax hike, can it?)... Resulting in hyper-inflation and a crushing of real growth. All empires before ours have eventually collapsed. We just don't have the competitive spirit and values that made America great. Now we're lazy and entitled. Guess it was just our time... Are you ready for that?

2) "Time to pay the piper... no more crazy spending, no more buying stuff we can't afford. Credit Cards get chopped up. Debt gets paid down. Take a job bartending on the weekends, even though I have my MBA. Work my ass off... Pay my bills"

God, that sounds horrible. That's a sacrifice. The next 3-5 years would be horrible if I did that. HORRIBLE.

Yup, but I have news for you. It's going to be HORRIBLE either way. But at the end we can be the next collapsed dynasty, or the first to kick and scream it's way back to greatness. It won't start with government. It won't start with Wall St. It starts with you... It starts with me.

Denny's Free Grandslam Is Truly Super... Super-Risky

2009-02-04T10:42:00.005-05:00

During the Superbowl, I spent much of my time evaluating the commercials and trying to decide what was working. I was checking Google Trends, to see what people were searching for. After the first quarter, the most popular search was for David Abernathy, the guy from the cars.com commercial. I didn’t even think that ad was that good, but I guess it peaked some curiosity. Doubt it stuck, though, or worked. No one is buying cars. To further my research, after good commercials, I’d go to the websites, to see if they still functioned. After the Visio ad, the Visio site was down. And after the Denny’s ad for a Free Grand Slam breakfast, their site was down as well. And a little while later, after Google Trends updated, “Denny’s Grand Slam Breakfast” was the number 1 search in the land. So, guess it worked… sort of. Cause this may end up being the most expensive promotion of all time.

As of this morning, CNN.com had a story giving some of the details on the results of the campaign. Denny’s served up free Grand Slam Breakfasts to patrons in 1,500 locations in the US, Canada and Puerto Rico… for 8 hours! Sounds like, on average, these breakfasts normally cost about $6 a piece. One restaurant said they had 2,400 eggs in stock that day for the promotion. So, let’s do some math (HOORAY – MATH!!):

Yup, Denny’s spent around $12 MILLION dollars on a breakfast promotion. And given their margins are maybe 20% if they’re lucky, that means they’d have to sell an incremental $60,000,000 (!!!) dollars worth of breakfasts this year to pay for the thing. And I’m excluding all the other costs like putting the ad campaign together.

Was this a good idea? Gosh, I think it’s a great brand campaign, I really do. And I think Denny’s could really thrive at a time like this, given the amount of value you get for $5.99. But DENN has a Market Cap of $180 MM dollars. How on earth do you spend $12 MM bucks on a Superbowl ad when you’re company is only worth $180 MM? Furthermore, Denny’s had a total global revenue in Q3 of $940 MM in their last reported year, so they need to increase their revenues by 7% just to break-even on the ad, and this is during the biggest recession since the depression? Umm… sounds a little risky, fellas.

But, I do like free breakfast. Yay privately funded stimulus packages!! Hope it pays of for them. Could mean a lot more free stuff for us.

Bruce Springsteen Is Going to Disneyland after Superbowl?

2009-02-01T20:20:00.006-05:00

At the end of his Superbowl performance, Bruce Springsteen yelled out "I'm going to Disneyland!!" - I guess, his attempt at humor, and not him taking some ad dollars to pimp Disneyland. That's a sickening thought.

Funny thing though, Disney owns ABC, and the Superbowl is on NBC. So, Springsteen may have gotten himself in some hot water. Generally doing a product placement for a competitors product in front of a billion people is frowned upon.

Oh, and him nailing the camera with his crotch at full speed was pretty funny too. Glad I wasn't wearing the 3D glasses for that.