Freud said that ‘dreams are the royal road to consciousness.’ In a heavily dunned entertainment culture where we live too often on sound bites, dreams are mostly ignored, shoved to the periphery of our attentiveness, seen as not really relevant to our lives. We do that at our own expense, losing the rich images that guide, the stories that awaken.

Show Length: 4.22

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Marriage Podcast 028 - Dreams

The mystery, meaning, and deep power that is possible between fathers and sons is often missed. We perhaps are lulled by the struggles of living or seduced into creating a version of each other that most times isn’t true. Whatever the case, finding a pathway to relationship is rich in possibility.

Show Length: 5.55

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Marriage Podcast 027 - Fathers and Sons

Need awareness is perhaps the most critical component of healthy relating. It’s hard to allow yourself to be aware of your own needs when your life has been spent in the presence of adults who applaud need denial. “What a great player!” I heard a youthful soccer coach say. “He played the entire second half hurting.” (the boy had a badly bruised leg).

The coach’s appeal to heroism didn’t sit well with most of us on the sideline. We wanted our sons (and daughters) to be real, to get the attention they needed and to learn another lesson. It’s ok to be injured and it’s ok to rest.

Show Length: 5.24

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Marriage Podcast 026 - Whining

It’s easy to let the world around you control your focus. It doesn’t take much effort to be a stooge of the ‘entertainment culture.’ Being entertained, distracted, pulled in directions others want you to go makes you lazy, relationally speaking. You can reclaim your focus and rebirth your relationship simply by creating your own purposeful focus. Try it.

Show Length: 5.09

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Marriage Podcast 025 - Stop, Look and Listen

That which is unaddressed, avoided or denied can cause great havoc in your relationship and set a mood – resentment – that will poison even your best efforts at loving. Of course you must be prepared for anything once you decide to speak your heart thoughts outloud.

Show Length: 5.36

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Marriage Podcast 024 - Resentment

The unfinished business you carry around can be like a cancer in your body.

Secrets, I’m not talking here about an individual’s right to private thoughts, can be toxic even lethal. Take a look at what you’re protecting and why. You may find a new path to intimate connections hidden in the very secrets you believed you had to carry alone.

Show Length: 5.39

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Marriage Podcast 023 - Secrets

We make much, in American dialogue about marriage, of the need for faithfulness. “Married 27 years and never been unfaithful.” There is another dimension to faithfulness that we don’t so often talk about. You’ll find it here in this reminder of what faithfulness is really all about.

Show Length: 5.04

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Marriage Podcast 022 - Faithfulness

If your life together is bland and joyless. If your conversations drift along with no energy, if you often feel resentful, this little story is for you.

Show Length: 5.25

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Marriage Podcast 021 - Yes, No or Maybe

Surrender used in the way we usually use it, has a negative connotation. “I give up,” or “I gave in.” There is a powerful need for surrender in relationships. It has to do with facing your own out of control ego. Power struggles are common but we don’t have to indulge our need for power.

Power struggles are usually about fear. Take a closer look at what you’re protecting and why. You’ll see great benefits.

Show Length: 4.19

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Marriage Podcast 020 - The Art of Surrender

It’s tempting to live in the future and it’s tempting as well to live in the past. All of us can live somewhere where we are not presently living or live with someone who is not our partner. This fundamental human talent causes a great deal of confusion. Tolle, in the Power of Now, reminds us forcefully that there is no other moment than the present. Learn to embrace that reality and your life will change.

Show Length: 5.30

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Marriage Podcast 019 - Discovering who you are where you are

You really can’t do a whole lot about revitalizing your marriage until you face the basic premise or premises it’s built upon. We call those premises the marriage paradigm. What we need to do is take the mask off our model of marriage so we can expose its origins and expectations. There’s a new way to think about, live in, and enjoy marriage – we call it “the marriage conversation.”

Show Length: 7.20

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Marriage Podcast 018 - The Marriage Conversation

What happens to us sometimes happens for us. What we call wounds can be the impetus to self realization. I don’t mean to be an ‘airy – fairy’ optimist here. I do mean to encourage you to take a second look at those experiences you perhaps have felt victimized by and see how you can transform them into something good for your life and the lives of those around you.

Show Length: 4.52

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Marriage Podcast 017 - Wounds into Gold

Consciousness is partly distilled wisdom. It is the capacity to take one’s own experience together with the experience of others and create a third thing. Consciousness summarizes, focuses, points. We are always distilling miles and miles of information - emotional, intellectual, spiritual, psychological and physical - and using it to make sense of our complex world.

Show Length: 4.32

I’d love to hear what you think. Please leave your comments below.

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Marriage Podcast 016 - Cognac

The stream of experience, the wealth of learning, the vast resources of memory – all are contained ‘in a nutshell’ in our stories. Stories help us feel our commonality, community, and communicate images we count on to survive. Stories pull us, push us, startle us, perplex us. Life without stories would be flat lined indeed.

Show Length: 6.46

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My Podcast Alley feed! {pca-9a46c0368da4f4691435f6e75847b265}

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Marriage Podcast 015 - Why Tell Stories in Your Marriage?

We are wonderfully made. We have all kinds of radar for picking up information that we’d otherwise miss. We also have a vast capacity for imagining, for creating clues to guide us. Trouble is, most of the time, we aren’t tuned in to the clues or the signals that our hard wiring offers.

Show Length:  5.49

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Marriage Podcast 014 - It Pays to Pay Attention to What You Know You Know