Marriage Success Tips And Advices

3 Situations You HAVE To Lie To Your Woman

2012-03-27T09:33:00.001-07:00

It's no surprise that both genders rely on lying to some extent. They just do it differently and sometimes for different reasons.

All humans, especially women say they want their partner to be honest. Is this the truth? Can you keep a relationship up and running if you are telling the truth all the time?

Imagine that you just have brought your girlfriend at your home, to spend the night together for the first time. You have made a great effort to arrange and clean your home and especially the bedroom. You are proud about this and ask your partner what she believes about your home.

She responds "It is a little old fashioned... and something smells bad in here". Ups! Ok.

You two pass through this awkward moment, then you start kissing each other, but you make a joke about... the size of your penis, and instead to hear the most used reply: "hey, relax, size really doesn't matter", she tells you that her ex was quite huge.

Ups... Not again. :)

If she were to say just two little lies everything could be great, but now...

The truth is, telling a few lies can be one of the best ways to keep your relationship healthy.

So if you want to keep her happy and keep getting laid, you're going to have to learn how to lie - and lie convincingly. The trick is figuring out what she wants to hear.

1. Never mention your sexual past... especially if it was a good one. If your girlfriend asks you what it was like or how good your ex was, you can tell a lie if you have to. Say it wasn't all that good. Don't ever mention her. Even if what you're saying is uncomplimentary, it will still have a negative effect. You bringing her up hints that she's still on your mind.

2. When it comes about how she looks, if you picked her to be your partner, you have to make her feel that she is a WOMAN. Every woman has something beautiful, something sexy and attractive, and if you make her know that you find her attractive she will be more confident, wilder and more passionate. But when she asks you about something you don't really like at her look, never but never tell her your true opinion. Just say that it is OK and pass over the moment. If you are telling her that you don't like something at her, she will feel frustrated and become more inhibited.

3. Everybody knows that women have more sensibility than men. So pay attention to her sensibility and don't make bad jokes about other people (especially her family) or let her know when you are up to take the cat and throw it out through the window. She will find you insensitive and you will lose points. Use your common sense and try not to hurt your woman’s feelings even if you have to say a little lie from time to time.

Overall, lying is a bad thing to do. But when it comes to women, you really have no choice.

The little white lies don't hurt anyone and are only meant as reassurance every now and then.

It's therefore okay to tell a person what they want to hear.

6 Secrets to Be the Nice Guy Women Want

2012-03-25T08:53:00.003-07:00

Sure you're nice - most people are. So what?

This quality is one that reflects your feeling
that you're a man worth knowing and you deserve
women's attention. But do you really believe
that women pay attention to what you think you
deserve?

Being nice is not enough. Okay, fine, you're nice,
but you also need to be interesting.

Unfortunately, "nice guy" equates to wimp/dweeb
in too many people's minds.

Believe me: you don't have to be a jerk to
attract women!

As a matter of fact, women did not like jerks or
aggressive men. They are attracted by challenging,
interesting guys. That's all. You can be
interesting, challenging and still a nice man. Be
yourself but keep in mind these significant
things that can make the difference between a
regular nice guy and a successful one:

1. Women LOVE a man who is a CHALLENGE... the
quickest and easiest way I've ever heard to let a
woman know that YOU are the guy she should be
pursuing is to let women know you are successful
with women. Be a nice guy, but one that is
desirable. :)

2. The MOST EFFECTIVE way to approach a woman and
spark her attraction for you is giving her a
COMPLIMENT on her looks. This can be suicidal if
done wrong... but just find something at her what
you really think is special, different about her.
You give attention, and you will get attention in
return!

3. Not being aggressive doesn't mean that you
have to wait for madam perfection to drop into
your lap (which you as a "nice guy" deserve by
definition, of course). You have to take some
initiative. BE SELF-CONFIDENT (but not really
cocky) and show some honest interest in something
about a woman.

4. The best selling genre of books in the world
is romance novels... because women LOVE romance.
So don't talk about sport for God seek! If you
are not the type of man that reads poetry or is
able to talk about moon or about the smell of
burned tree leafs, don't do it. You'll look
unnatural. But taking your date in a romantic
place, offering her a nice flower, enjoying some
good music or even touching her hand in a
delicate way is very romantic.

5. And don't talk only about you. You want her to
listen to you? Then first listen carefully to her
when she needs to be heard. The most effective
way to be interesting is asking questions and…
listens. Only try and you'll see. :)

Keep in mind that often (not always, but very
often) when a woman tells you about a problem she'
s having, she's not looking to you for the
solution. What? That doesn't make sense? What
she's often looking for is comfort and
reassurance and knowing that YOU'RE THERE.

6. One of the most important things in dating is
to approach women that are interested in dating
and women that seem to be interested in you. Don'
t try to sell candies to someone that is looking
for peanuts and don't waste your time with women
that are still affected by their ex long term
relationships. You don't want to be just a
shoulder to cry?

You only live once, so live your life well!

3 Tricks When Talking on the Phone with a Woman You Have Met Online

2012-03-23T08:45:00.019-07:00

A Complete Step-by-step Guide To Online Dating For Women!

You have met an interesting woman online. You twohad a great time chatting online and she decided to give you her phone number. Now you have to make her want to see you face to face, and the phone is your only tool.

The first telephone call is the most important one. Sure you have her number, but nothing has been won yet.

1. Before you call you should have prepared a list of several topics to talk about. Hopefully your email exchange has provided you with some information to follow up on. Study her profile to think of other topics to talk about. Prepare open ended questions. Start talking about a subject, and give her a chance to speak as well.

2. DON'T: ask her questions about other guys she's seeing, suspiciously interrogate her about how she spends her time, and angrily reprimand her for flaking on you. How she spends her time is her business.

A lot of men sabotage their chances with a woman by don't giving her enough credit and respect.

You know there's trouble if you're doing all the talking and her replies are short or non-existent. If so it either means you haven't hit on the right topic to talk about, or, more likely, she simply isn't interested. Also, if she ends the conversation early or "has to go", leave it up to her to call you again, if she wants to. Usually, she won't.

So, when talking to a woman on the phone DON'T worry about impressing her. Have fun. Enjoy the conversation. Amuse yourself.

True Love: Dying Reveals Secrets To Great Relationships!

3. At first phone conversation is better to stay away of complimenting her. I think giving women compliments can be very powerful. But when you give a woman compliments within the context of trying to win her over, you become a wuss.

Usually women are curious why the men they are talking to online decided to pick them instead of other thousandths of profiles. Most of them will ask you about these "reasons" and by doing this are giving you the opportunity to make her compliments. So, wait the moment. :)

If the conversation flow easily, effortlessly, if you find her fairly responsive and you can keep up the conversation for at least a half hour you can ask her out. Her answer seam to be: "YES".

The 21 Basic Laws Of Successful Relationships.

If You Think Divorce Is The Only Option...Read On!

2012-03-21T08:35:00.001-07:00

Going through the Pain Barrier

Nobody likes pain but its there for a purpose. I am a long time supporter of The Leprosy Mission and one of the things that I’ve discovered about leprosy is that its not normally the disease that results in a persons fingers or toes falling off, it’s the fact that the disease of leprosy stops a person being able to feel pain and so they will unconsciously burn themselves badly and not feel it. The nerve endings have been damaged and so they cannot feel pain at all and the results, more often than not, are the hideous deformities that we now associate with a leper. A leper would love to feel pain because they know that pain is given to us to warn our bodies that something is wrong that needs put right, if possible. Pain is not always a bad thing.

I run marathons. Do you think I feel pain when I run a marathon? You bet I do! A marathon is one of the supreme tests of endurance that average people can undertake. During the run your body uses up all its stores of carbohydrates and other necessary body fuels and then begins to feed off itself – it turns cannibal, if you like. This is painful. As well as that, it is not uncommon to pull a muscle, develop a blister, get a stitch, hurt your joints or any other number of painful ailments. Your body is telling you to stop, this is damaging to it! In this context, pain is your body’s natural way to tell you that you are overdoing it – and of course you are. However, all of us can ‘overdo it’ for a lot longer than we think is possible initially. We can learn to acknowledge the pain and, whilst taking steps to minimise it, we can still run on and on. Mind over matter if you like.

One of the great acts of heroism I ever witnessed was during an Olympic marathon when the Tanzanian representative fell during the race badly injuring himself. He got up and struggled on in obvious pain whilst all the other runners disappeared up the road in front of him. It was demoralising for him but he refused to give up. He struggled on and entered the stadium with only a few people still left in the stands to cheer him home. He finished the race with blood pouring from his leg wound just as they were taking down the finishing line and a television reporter asked why he hadn’t just given up after falling so badly. His response was brilliant. He replied, “My country did not send me here to start a race. They sent me to finish a race!” Too many of us start the race but are not so committed to finishing.

I am firmly convinced that if a couple acknowledge to each other that there will be times of pain then they will be better able to cope with it for a period when it happens. In the western world, we have been brought up with this strange belief that we should never suffer and so, when we inevitably do hit times of suffering, we have not prepared ourselves to handle it properly. I have a friend who lectures on philosophy in universities in many third world countries. He says that one question he is never asked in third world countries is, “Why does God allow suffering?” The reason for this is that suffering is just such a normal part of their lives that they cannot imagine that anyone doesn’t suffer. In fact it’s the suffering that makes them into the people they are. Can you accept that suffering makes you a better person?

Here are five things we can do when we feel pain in our relationship:-

1. We need to acknowledge that there is pain and try to isolate what is causing it.

As we have said already in regard to the lepers, pain has a purpose. It tells us that something is not right. When we feel pain in our relationship we need to stop and analyse why we are feeling that particular pain. When I was an accountant and had a bit more money at my disposal, one of the things I would do when I felt some pain in my marriage was to throw a bit of money at it. We’d take a holiday, go for a nice meal, buy some new clothes, get our hair done up (well at least my wife would do this). Now, if you’ve got the resources, there is nothing intrinsically wrong with any of these things but we need to be aware that by distracting our minds for a little while from the cause of the pain it doesn’t make the pain go away long term. It only puts a plaster over a wound that needs treatment. However, all we were doing by throwing money at our problems was delaying the inevitable and sooner or later we would have a big argument.

It’s a bit like developing a toothache. Sure, you can dull the pain by putting some painkilling drug on your gum but if the cause of the pain is not dealt with, we know that it will flare up again, and next time even more painfully. Indeed if we kept on ignoring the pain then it might result in a tooth being removed. What started out as a simple toothache resulted in surgery. Not good.

In marriage there are a number of ways of figuring out what is causing the pain. Most of them common sense. You could try just talking to each other. Now there’s a novel suggestion! You could try doing the simple exercises in chapter 2 of this book and then discussing the results. You could talk to a professional counsellor who is trained to get to the bottom of painful issues. Whatever you decide to do it is crucial that you do something and do not ignore your pain. Once again the keyword is action.

2. The second thing we can try when pain rears its probing head is something that might seem very obvious but it is worth stating again just in case you miss it. Make sure that the pain you feel is associated with your marriage and not something else, like your job or even your children. So often we can be under pressure at our work and then come home and take it out on our partner. This is called displacing the pain. One of the things that I had to learn to do was to actually say to my wife, when I came home after a particularly hard day at work, that I was feeling stressed and tired. At first it felt like a confession of weakness and it wasn’t easy for me to admit that sometimes I wasn’t coping as well as I’d like to pretend. When I admitted as much to my wife, almost every time she was able to understand and take a bit more of the household pressure for a short time.

On other occasions the pressure was in the other direction and after a hard day of dealing with young children my wife would sometimes take out her frustrations on me. If I failed to recognise that this was happening the result could easily be a full-blown argument over pain that had been displaced. It is very important to be able to admit to feeling under pressure and to ask for some help from your spouse. If you don’t, the pain you feel elsewhere will automatically come out in your marriage.

3. The third thing to fix in your mind and believe is that pain is not a signal that your marriage is over.

When I’m running a marathon I need to keep reminding myself that pain is a totally natural for this event and expected part of the race. I do not give up at the first twinge or even at quite severe pain. I battle through it. Of course, I have to put up with some pain if I want to finish the race. One thing that drives me nuts these days is when I read a report in a newspaper of the latest celebratory couple who have split up citing ‘irreconcilable differences’ as the cause. What they are really saying is that they encountered a wee bit pain and so just gave up! Usually they live such a pampered lifestyle that any sort of pain is just not acceptable and so they walk away (to repeat the exercise with someone else). Do not succumb to this modern malaise. If you never learn how to put up with a bit of pain, every relationship you enter into will head down the same path. If you don’t believe me, just check out the marriages in Hollywood. Don’t become a quitter. Pain is not the end – it’s a sign that something needs to be done. In fact, it can be a beginning if you let it.

4. Stop focusing on the pain.

Whatever you focus on will begin to define who you are. If all you can see are the bad things in your marriage it won’t be long until your marriage accurately reflects your focus. In a marathon, if I keep thinking about how painful it is, there is a big temptation to give up. So what I do is to try and focus on more pleasant things such as the scenery, the joy of running, the anticipation of finishing, other runners (especially those who dress up in stupid outfits), anything to divert my attention from the pain for a little while. It’s amazing how often the pain is actually more mental than physical. I believe that the same thing can be achieved in marriage. Instead of focusing on the toothpaste lid or the toilet seat (to quote just two clichés) why not focus on your partner’s great sense of humour or their willingness to always switch off the lights or any of a hundred other endearing qualities? It’s amazing how trivial the irritations become when you remove them from the centre of your focus.

Try this simple exercise. Take a very small coin and hold it arms length between your finger and thumb. Does it block out much of the view behind it? No, obviously it doesn’t. Now bring the coin up closer and closer to your eye and close the other eye. What happens? It blocks your view almost completely, doesn’t it? It’s only a small coin but it can completely obliterate your view if you let it. Often the same thing happens in marriage. You can forget all the tremendous blessings you have together and focus on the one tiny fault until it takes over and dominates your thinking. Don’t allow it to do so. Now, what you’ve just read might sound like a contradiction to point 1 but its not. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting here that you bury your head in the sand regarding pain in your marriage but what I am saying is to make sure that the thing you think is causing you pain is actually as bad as you are making out. Have you just become so used to whining about something that it has come to dominate your thinking unnecessarily? Don’t let a small pain obliterate your view of a great marriage.

5. Share the Pain

Can I just remind you of something? You are married. It’s okay to share the hard things with your spouse. Remember the vows that you took? “For better and for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health.” Perhaps you’ve always felt that you had to be strong and support your spouse and so when you feel pain what do you do? Pretend it’s not sore? Tell him/her that you can cope? Why don’t you just admit that you’re finding something tough and ask for their support? It might be the very thing that draws you together. Share , share, share.

As I draw to the end of this chapter I want to leave you with an amusing story.

A little old couple walked slowly into a McDonalds one cold winter evening. They looked out of place amid the young families and young couples eating there that night. Some of the customers looked admiringly at them. You could tell what the admirers were thinking. "Look, there’s couple who have been through a lot together, probably for 60 years or more!"

The little old man walked up to the cash register, placed his order with no hesitation and then paid for their meal. The couple took a table near the back wall and started taking food off of the tray. There was one hamburger, one order of French fries and one drink. The little old man unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half. He placed one half in front of his wife. Then he carefully counted out the French fries, divided them in two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife. He took a sip of the drink, and then his wife took a sip as the man began to eat his few bites.

Again, you could tell what people around the old couple were thinking. "That poor old couple." As the old man began eating his French fries, a young man stood up and walked to the old couples' table. He politely offered to buy another meal. The old man replied that they were just fine. They were used to sharing everything and, anyway, their appetites were not what they used to be.

Then the crowd noticed that the little old lady still hadn't eaten a thing. She just sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally sipped some of the drink. Again, the young man came over and begged them to let him buy them another meal. This time, the lady explained that no, they were used to sharing. As the little old man finished eating and was wiping his face neatly with a napkin, the young man could stand it no longer and asked one last time if he could buy them one more meal.

After being politely refused again, he finally asked the little old lady, "Ma'am, why aren't you eating. You said that you share everything. What is it that you are waiting for?" She answered, ………… "The teeth!"

Aaaagghhh! Yes I know it’s disgusting, but its probably not a true story and anyway it does illustrate the principle of sharing in a way that you will not forget. Will you?

Back to pain. As I said in the opening sentence, nobody enjoys pain. However, if you can just acknowledge what it is trying to tell you, but not allow it to knock you off track, then your marriage will survive and grow.

If you would like to read more of my ebook then please go immediately to this website www.themarriagesite.com

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Child Custody and Seeing Your Kids - Visitation

2012-03-16T09:43:00.002-07:00

Child custody has several forms, sole custody and joint custody. Sole custody means one parent gets physical as well as legal custody. Joint custody is another type of child custody, where both parents get the right to have a share in making decisions for the child. There is also a type of joint custody where the child gets to stay for some period of time with each of the parent. However, it is said that this can be a bit difficult for the child.

It is necessary that joint custody that both parents are co-operating with each other regarding decision making about the child. It all depends on how the divorce proceedings have been, in case of a bitter divorce and conflict; it might be better that sole custody of child is awarded to a single parent.

It is required by the state laws that whichever type of custody is awarded, it is necessary that it should be in the best interests of the child. Unlike in earlier times, when mother was taken as the correct person to raise a child, today the court looks at the fact and selects the parent who has been playing an active role in raising the child.

The court allows periodical visitation rights to the parent who has not been awarded physical custody of the child; these visits take place in the home of the parent who has not been given the physical custody. However, the court might not give any rights for visitation if there is fear of any physical harm or abuse in the history of parents, the court instead of denying totally might give supervised visitation charges.

In cases where there are charges of abuse, especially sexual abuse hurled at one another by each parent, the court can give further instructions for investigation in case it is in doubt of these charges. Though there have been a number of cases where accusation of abuse has been used to get more money or to harm the spouse’s reputation.

However, if the accusation of child abuse does not hold true in someone’s case, he should not be silent over the issue and should try to gain help from several organizations which provide advice, support and sometimes legal advice. One such organization is VOCAL (Victims of Child Abuse Laws).

According to the law, visitation rights and child support payments are different issues, therefore though visitation has not been allowed one is required to pay. The court, while giving the custody of the child might take a view of ‘in best interests of the child’ where it considers several factors.

Most times both parents agree that the mother should get custody, but times are changing across the board and men are gaining more custody recently.

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4 Steps to Help Heal a Broken Heart

2012-03-14T09:32:00.003-07:00

Heartbreak is a pain like any other. It is an emotional pain so bottomless that it can feel like a physical blow. When you have a pain like this one, all you want is for the deep ache to go away. As much as I’d like to advise differently, there is no band aid for a broken heart. Though it sounds cliché, time is the remedy needed for you to truly heal from such a deep, wrenching pain. In time, this pain will go away. Between now and then, however, following a few basic tips might be able to make the difference in how you are feeling.

1.    Cry: You are going to feel like rubbish for the first few weeks. Depending how emotional of a person you are, you may feel like crying for days. Go ahead. A significant change has occurred in your life; a painful change. There is no way to expect that you will feel a little sadness and be able to shut it off with a switch. It’s just not that simple. Allow yourself to grieve for your loss. But not too long! Staying in the past for too long can only hurt you. See rule number 4.
2.    Talk to Someone Close: Use the shoulder of someone who cares about you to get out your feelings. This is a way to purify your soul by letting someone in to share your pain. Let them listen, comfort you, and offer advice. You don’t necessarily have to take that advice, but sharing this comfort can make you feel better. Make sure you only allow yourself to grieve and lean on someone for a time because you need to move forward.
3.    Distract Yourself: Bring friends you care about back into your life. Maybe having the relationship was keeping you from spending time with your parents, or siblings. Maybe you hadn’t talked to your best friend in weeks. Surround yourself with this support network. Getting things that need to be done around the house done is a great way to get lost in a project. Go to the gym. Organize your closet. Get out and take a walk. Distracting yourself is a great stepping stone to moving on with your life. This brings us to rule number 4.
4.    Look toward the Future; Forget the Past: Once you have allowed yourself the indulgence of grieving for a part of your life that is now past, look forward! There is a definite need to be able to start a new chapter in the book of your life. Now that you are past the sadness and anger, it is time for hope and renewal that will help you to move on. Take time out for yourself; get to know yourself as a single individual instead of as part of a couple. Replenish your soul by becoming you again.

Following these sometimes difficult, but necessary steps, you can begin to heal the broken pieces of your heart. You can not only become whole again, you can become whatever you wish to become. This is a chance to start fresh, and once the pain starts to ease, you will see it as such an opportunity.

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A Good Choice: Collaborative Divorce

2012-03-12T09:27:00.003-07:00

The 21 Basic Laws Of Successful Relationships.

We know from long experience that only collaborative divorce -- not old-style adversarial legal representation, and not a single mediator working with or without lawyers in the picture -- views divorce as a complex experience requiring advice and counsel from multiple perspectives if it is to be navigated well. Collaborative divorce prepares you to deal with the emotional challenges and changes associated with divorce and provides the resources that can best help you make a healthy transition from married to single.

Collaborative divorce builds in important protections for children, too. It informs you fully about how your children are experiencing the divorce and what they need to weather the big changes in their family structure without harm. It helps protect your future relationship with your spouse by informing both of you fully -- together, at the same time -- about the financial realities of your marriage and divorce in a way that eliminates pointless arguments about economic issues. It also teaches you and your spouse new ways of problem solving and conflict resolution so that you develop useful skills for addressing your differences more constructively in the future. Further, collaborative divorce

Helps you clarify your individual and shared values and priorities
Helps you and your spouse reach maximum consensus
Includes complete advice about the law without using legal rights as the sole template for negotiation and resolution
Helps you and your spouse resolve serious differences creatively and without destructive conflict
Helps parents improve their ability to coparent after divorce
Builds in agreements about resolution of future differences after the divorce is over
Focuses not only on resolving past differences but also on planning for healthy responses to current challenges and on laying a strong foundation for the future after the divorce is over
Aims toward deep resolution, not shallow peace
Why You Do Not Want an "Old-Style Divorce"

Dissolve Problems And Transform Them Into Opportunities!

We're confident that, like the people we work with every day, you want to protect yourself and your loved ones from the havoc that an old-style divorce can wreak in your lives. Let's summarize the facts you now know about old-style divorce:

It is based on the centuries-old belief that divorce is wrong and abnormal
It seeks to find fault and mete out punishment
It focuses on the past
It is premised on conflict
It is constrained by an arbitrary legal framework intended to resolve matters of right and wrong by the exchange of money
It aims at a deal, not deep resolution
It fails to take into account current understandings of how people are wired, what they need in times of change, what children need during and after divorce, and how families change and restructure
What's more, we know that old-style divorce is bad for individuals, families, and communities because

It's expensive
It's hurtful and damaging
It's "one size fits all"
It deems irrelevant many common concerns that are extremely important to most people because judges can't issue enforceable orders about them
It focuses on the past
It encourages unrealistic expectations on the part of both spouses about what should happen in the divorce
It resolves disputes through competing predictions of what a judge would do rather than focusing on what you and your partner can agree on
It won't provide essential help to you or those you care about
The emotional and social costs are incalculable
Luckily, we live in an era when there is finally a better option -- one that can end a marriage without destroying a family or setting into motion negative effects that can bedevil family members for a lifetime.

Why Collaborative Divorce Works So Well

The reasons why collaborative divorce does such a good job of helping most people achieve their own "best divorce" are simple. Collaborative divorce addresses the financial and legal matters that must be resolved in any divorce, but it does so more effectively because it provides the built-in help of three professions, not just one. The design of collaborative divorce -- with its team of professionals, its systematic attention to values, its emphasis on healthy relationships, and its focus on the future -- takes into account the broad spectrum of what really matters to most people when their marriages end. It considers not only the two spouses but those around them who also matter to the divorcing couple and who will be both directly and indirectly affected by a good or a bad divorce: children, families, and even extended families, friends, and colleagues. It applies what we know about marriage and divorce from the realms of psychology, sociology, history, law, communication theory, conflict resolution theory, finance, and other realms in a very practical, useful, and concrete way.

Collaborative Divorce Deals With What People Actually Experience in Divorce

Unlike any other divorce conflict resolution process that has come before, collaborative divorce teams make constant use of vital information about how people are "wired," how we think, how our emotions affect our ability to communicate effectively and to process information, how we experience pain and loss, how we recover from the end of a marriage, what our children are experiencing and what they need in the divorce, and what the needs of each member of the family after the divorce are likely to be. In this way, collaborative divorce offers constructive, comprehensive, multidisciplinary professional support that responds to the actual complexities of divorce as people experience it, rather than imposing an old-fashioned, limited institutional legal point of view as the sole perspective on a complex human experience.

Reprinted from Collaborative Divorce: The Revolutionary New Way to Restructure Your Family, Resolve Legal Issues, and Move on with Your Life by Pauline H. Tesler, M.A., J.D., & Peggy Thompson, Ph.D. Copyright © 2006 Pauline H. Tesler & Peggy Thompson. Published by Regan Books; June 2006;$25.95US/$33.50CAN; 0-06-088943-8

Authors
Pauline H. Tesler, M.A., J.D., has been a specialist in family law certified by California State Bar Board of Legal Specialization since 1985. She is a fellow of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers and lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her husband. www.lawtsf.com

Peggy Thompson, Ph.D., has been a licensed psychologist specializing in families and children for thirty years. For the past fifteen years, she has been actively involved in the development and practice of collaborative divorce. Peggy lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her husband. www.cdadivorce.com

Together they confounded the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals.

For more information, please visit www.collaborativedivorcebook.com

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7 Signs That She Is a Fraud

2012-03-10T09:09:00.003-08:00

Dissolve Problems And Transform Them Into Opportunities!

If you are looking for love and marriage abroad, it is very simple to get it right, believe me! There are thousands of honest, sincere women who will be genuinely interested in YOU!

But after you are meeting a nice girl that seems to be right for you make sure the person you are talking to is FOR REAL.

Frankly, looking for a partner abroad is not any different than any other search - search for a house, a second-hand car, or whatsoever, in one simple yet important detail: there will always be people that will try to take advantage of you.

The perception that you have built about dating scams can make you be cautious and suspicious all the time! That is even worse. Chances are you will make the same mistakes as other guys and destroy what was a really good and honest relationship - just because of being paranoid about scammers.

But what if I tell you that there are some specific signs that can make you solve the enigma of sincerity in your relationship and find out that the person you were corresponding with is not who she said she is?

1. Money is a key object to know a scam. At some point she begins to ask for money, frequently asking that it be transferred through wire services. She commonly states that the money is needed to help resolve a family tragedy or arrange for a trip to the United States. A copy of a fraudulent U.S. visa is sometimes attached to prove good intentions.

Beside this, there are other subtle signs that can make you be suspicious from the first e-mails she is sending you.

2. The most prominent is the fact that scammers don't really read your letters. They don't remember what you have written - actually, they don't relate to the content of your letters at all. They don't answer your questions.

3. Things move very fast, and she falls in love with you within 1-5 letters. Those letters she send to you could be sent to anybody: "her" letters are pure monologue that becomes more and more obsessed with "her love" to you and her desire to be together with you despite of everything that separates you.

4. She doesn't want to provide you with her phone number pretending that she doesn't have a phone or that she didn't speak English. Paper can bear anything, you know that. But even phone conversation can give you more clues of what's really going on (though men usually tend to misinterpret subtle signs excusing them by the language barrier).

5. Your name usually appears only once, or does not appear at all in the correspondence she is sending to you. She uses "darling", "sweetheart", "my love" and so on instead, because she is probably afraid not to mix the names of her victims or is sending the same messages to all of them only changing the names.

6. She lets you know from the very beginning that she is a student or how little she earns, including the size of her salary even though you never asked about it. But she never asks about the state of your finances - neither uses the word "financially secure" in her description of the prospective partner.

7. She writes you almost every day (keeps sending you photos even if you did not ask for) and in her letters she talks a lot about trust, honesty and sincerity. :)

So of course you must be aware of the fact that there are some individuals out there who may try to extract from you some amounts in cash, but remember that not all pretty girls you are meeting online are swindlers. Many men who were looking for a foreign wife, and met a wonderful girl without problems, are very surprised to find information about scams - they did not know that such a thing exists!

It is you who takes the choice and the risk.

Enjoy but don't get fooled.

A Smart Woman's Guide To Dating, Relationships & Break Ups.Click Here!

True Love: Dying Reveals Secrets To Great Relationships!

Divorce - Are You Feeling Cheated?

2012-03-08T09:08:00.000-08:00

Are you feeling relieved after divorce or cheated? After many divorces people feel happy while in many rather more cases they feel cheated. Why? Divorce it self is a very painful process and the times that lead to divorce are more painful. The question is why get the sense of feeling cheated after getting divorce? Let us talk about this.

Relationship demands giving - People give a lot to their marriage; most of them do it except few. Right from the development of relationship, a lot of time, emotional energy and physical resources are given to make it work. During marriage the investment goes higher. Most of the partners want the marriage to work. There are exceptions that unbelievably want to destroy because of psychological problems. When cracks develop in the marriage, lot more effort is made to save the marriage and when the marriage breaks after putting in so much effort, one feels cheated.

Is this true for all? This is not true for all. There are few individuals who don't give anything in marriage. They ask for it. The demand and contribute nothing. That is the game of selfishness played by them. So these people will never feel cheated. They will only feel bad that they lost an easy victim.

What should you do? The only way out is to forget the losses. Try to erase the past as much as possible. This will be difficult, but break the pain bit by bit. Work on it and it will go away one day. Try to forge another relationship and forget what went wrong. Cut your losses as soon as possible.

A Smart Woman's Guide To Dating, Relationships & Break Ups.Click Here!
How To Uncover Compatibility Problems In Any Relationship Through Handwriting. Follow The Easy Instructions And Gain A Valuable, Lifelong Skill. Amazingly Accurate.Click Here!

Can We Still Be Friends

2012-03-05T09:23:00.000-08:00

Life is really not like the movies. If people’s life was like the movies then every person’s love life would be pretty healthy. There would be no unhappy endings. Let’s face, life is not like the movies. If there’s anything in life that resembles movies it’s the nightmarish things that happen in the middle of movies. I say this because of some endings in movies where relationships end and one party asks if they could still be friends. In the movie world it can still work out, in the real world it just might be a dream.

When your ex asks if you too can still be friends after the relationship, it would make you think a lot. Do you think that this is really possible? It might make you sit back a moment and think very well. But why in the world or how your friendship can last when everything you had in your relationship just broke down. So when an ex ask that question it might only be polite to say “sure why not.” But deep inside both of you know that it might be hard to be good friends again. That expression is just used as a consolation prize for the dumping you had.

People who ask and say yes to these things do not really mean what they are saying. How can both of you be good friends when you have some bitterness? Maybe if the relationship has ended without the bitterness and with common consent. Even though, this will still be hard especially for the first couple of months, because being with the person will make you remind of some stuff that could have and have not been. It would be hard to make these new-ex friendship work really.

This may also happen to persons who have just had a crash and burn during their first couple of dates. When one party thinks you are getting lame, he or she may only say, its best we stay as friends. Yeah right!

How can both of you be friends if you are not able to go out, talk or have fun most of the time. A friend is a person you develop your trust through time. What happens during that time is that you only became acquaintances and not friends.

So it’s pretty stupid too make the other party be on the expecting end. It might happen on some rare occasions. But it would need a whole lot of work, where you would need to remove the emotional baggage. It might also work if you get some Hollywood magic.

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Do You Know The Pros And Cons Of Adult Online Dating?

2012-02-26T14:44:00.002-08:00

Adult online dating services are a specialized niche in online dating, offering a number of similar features such as full searching capabilities and a large number of subscribers. Completely anonymous and secure, adult online dating services feature erotic personals, where one can view sexy photos of other members. Simply register and immediately contact any member via instant messaging, plus you can search or apply filters that allow you to narrow down the members that suit your specific needs and desires. Many adult online dating services allow all members to add a profile to the site, chat, send instant messages, and browse through their huge database of profiles for free. Guests may enter the site and browse around, but in order to post a listing or use all of the site features you must register as a member.

The benefits of adult online dating involve:

·    The ability for less sexually experienced or shy personalities to express and explore their sexual nature.
·    It is a safe secure environment to practice safe, virtual sex.
·    The ability to feel comfortable with the cybersex partner due to the anonymous nature of the Internet and adult chatrooms.

Just as adult dating online has its set of advantages, there can be drawbacks to overindulgence. The dangers of adult dating services online, particularly pertaining to cybersex, involve:

·    Not knowing the person you are dealing with - the Internet cannot screen the age or sex of participants, potentially causing ethical concerns.
·    People can take online adult dating services too seriously and personally. Reports have been noted on cybersex addiction.
·    Internet adult dating could potentially ruin your physical sex life due to the lack of anonymity in the physical space.
·    It is not healthy to experience only online relationships as this will deter you from entering real physical relationships.

If and when you are ready to use this medium, weigh the pros and cons of adult online dating to ensure that both you and other members have an enjoyable and positive experience.

Marriage Counseling: Using Games to Reduce Tension

2012-02-24T02:01:00.001-08:00

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Marriage is one of the most enjoyable but also one of the most painful experiences that people undergo. It carries with it the whiff of romance and eternal bliss, but sometimes you get a pack of thorns instead.

How Do You Ensure Your Marriage Is a Bed of Roses and not Thorns?
One of the major ingredients that a happy marriage needs is a willingness to compromise. But that is much more difficult than it seems. Everyone will agree that they need to compromise, but what happens when the issue is not a simple and tiny one? What then? Who Compromises first? I am sure you must have said to yourself at one point or another that enough is enough. You will no longer be the patsy. You are an independent person and your partner has crossed the line. Maybe.

Maybe your relationship has died and you are just beginning to realize it. Maybe your sentiments are more passionate than romantic. Maybe you no longer love her.

Stop being a fool!
What if I told you that the solution to your marital strife is not divorce. Am I mad?

Look around. How many divorces do you know? Plenty. Me too. But are they really happier off?

What is the first thing that a divorced person does? He or she goes out and starts looking for partners.

Isn't that strange? No. You say that everybody needs somebody to love. Maybe. I say that they had that somebody and they just let them go. So please stop being foolish.

Why not tackle your problems with a simple suggestion? A Game.

Games as a Peace Maker:
Playing brings out the child in us and causes us to express more than we normally would. We also release bottled up frustration and let go of mental thorns in our outbursts of joy and anguish as we win or lose. Games unite people together and therefore I suggest playing together but if you wish one can play against the other. The game turns into a battle but only this time, after its over, you will both feel refreshed from losing all that bottled up pain and anger.

Games to Pick From:
Try picking games that both of you like or at least somewhat active ones. You could even play hide and seek in the house or something else. If you do prefer playing cards, pick a game which does not go on for long and which requires some thinking like hearts, poker, bridge or rummy. Keep score and determine before hand that the loser has to do something for the winner. Chores is not a prize for the winner! If you lose you have to do something that that the other person wants for themselves like give them their favorite massage or cook them their favorite meal.

Conclusion:
Games are a welcome ambrosia to love and will excite you as a couple to disregard all your frustrations and anger and deal only with the good. The anger and frustrations will not magically disappear, but now you can deal with them together calmly and in a good mood.

All About Love

2012-02-22T01:53:00.000-08:00

How do you know if you’ve ever been in love? Most people would argue that although being in love with someone is non-tangible, there is absolutely no doubt in their mind of it existing. In fact, if you are questioning whether or not you are in love, then you are most certainly not.

While I do not doubt for a second the existence of being in love (albeit being one of those sad individuals yet to experience it), I am somewhat perplexed over our perception of what constitutes humanities most sought after experience.

For me, falling in love with someone is a decision made based on the successful matching of ones own predetermined criteria or preferences.

I fondly refer to the preliminary stage of partner selection as the ‘terminator glasses’ phase, since it filters through a potential mate’s attributes and matches them off against our own unique preferences.

On the New Years Eve just passed I went to meet friends at a bar where we would be celebrating the evening. There, waiting at the door with my friend, I saw HIM for the first time. I did a quick terminator scan:
Height: Around 6 foot. MATCH.
Build: Not too skinny, not too fat, not too buff. MATCH.
Hair: Short dark brown. Not over the top alla David Beckham. MATCH.
Complexion: Dark olive. MATCH.
Lips: Plump. MATCH.
Smile: Oh my God. MATCH.
Eyes: Big, brown, expressive, with long thick lashes. MATCH!
Stance: Gentle, not cocky. MATCH.
Nationality: Clearly foreign, probably Brazilian. MATCH.

With the terminator glasses still firmly planted on my face, the confirmed Brazilian was permitted to move onto the second part of phase one: interaction. This is often the most fatal part of any potential relationship, since every sentence uttered, every look given, and every movement is put through the filter of the terminator glasses. Any miss-match could lead to premature relationship death. Very little is forgiven during this part, especially if one’s program is set at ‘long term mate’. In saying this, it is also my favorite part of the process as it is the most fun. I see it as a game we both know we’re playing, but refuse to acknowledge as existing. One can withdraw from the game at anytime without repercussion (that is, of course, when both parties are working under the same set of rules. If this is not the case a few unwanted phone numbers are collected, followed by a few awkward conversations. And depending on how weak one is - unwanted dates followed by unwanted kisses, possibly ending in unwanted sex!).

Stage two, ‘the rose coloured glasses’ phase, is extremely dangerous and not usually approached with caution by either candidate. Depending on the impact of stage one, bombs warning ‘relationship doom’ could be dropped right in front of ones eyes, yet getting let go un-noticed. Everything appears and is, invariably, utterly workable. Despite my cynicism, this stage is defiantly more exciting than the terminator phase, albeit being laced with the fear of it all ending. The premature ‘I love you’ could escape ones mouth, falling like a ball onto a roulette table. The stakes are high, but it could also very well pay off and pass you onto stage three. Or not…

Declaring the title of stage three is difficult. And the truth is, I don’t know what to call it because I’m usually making my way to the green exit sign above the fire escape before you can say ‘marry me’.

My experience with stage three is that I usually realize Mr Perfect is human. I resist accepting him just the way he is, and try to point out where he is lacking (he is usually not so open to my constructive criticism. I wonder why?). This of course does not lead him to change his ways, but firmly ground himself in them (and resent me in the process). Love and commitment gets swapped with fear and dependence. Some stay to battle it out to the very end, most head straight for the green exit light.

People claim at this point that they have ‘fallen out of love’. My argument is that they were never in love in the first place. One of my favourite movies, ‘Moulin Rouge’, melodically states, “The greatest thing you will ever learn, is just to love, and be loved in return”. I believe this is what we think being in love is all about. Yet being loved in return implies that there is a condition to your giving love. So romantic love is conditional love. If romantic love only goes one-way, it is termed unrequited love or even ‘desperate’.

What if I said that true love can only be unconditional? And inside of that, true love can only mean 100% acceptance of the subject, just the way they are and just the way they’re not. What if love, real love, is just loving?

Is It Normal To Date Several People?

2012-02-20T01:33:00.000-08:00

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Some of these guys seem really confused when they see so many beauties. All of those fabulous ladies also look for someone to share the rest of their lives with, and of course they also can be selective in their preferences. That’s why many men ask the question: can I or should I correspond with one lady or several of them at the same time.

People may have different points of view on this issue what actually makes the thing worse. It makes guys torn over prospective with no confidence which’s correct.

On the one hand, for some guys it seems appropriate to get to know several ladies because they have more chances to have "love chemistry" with at least one. Some afraid that if they write to one Online bride and then find no chemistry in the personal meeting, then it all will have been a waste of their time, money and the most horrible – end of their dream.

The most complicated thing for guys dating several

Beautiful girls online is that each of these women is great, and men do not want to be wrong or hurt any of them without knowing in person. Some fear that each might feel that she has found "chemistry" with him. Any guy who simultaneously experiences several online affairs can get an increasing sense that each one of his ladies is feeling that their written relationship is becoming more serious.

It’s very common that a man usually starts his online wife- search being in touch with multiple girls who he thinks as potentially having a chance to be the queen of his heart. Then, most of the guys narrow it down to just two or even one lady before making a visit. It just naturally happens that during the long months of correspondence some girl may find another guy whom she thinks is more alluring for her. Some men intentionally do The Three-Way Conference Calls to be sure about the feeling they and their potential wives share, of course to get rid of some concerns and doubts. So, when a guy orders a call in the agency he accounts to guess things from what he hears and than, he is also able to follow the girl’s reaction in a live talk.

But do the ladies understand that their online fiances may date other girls from their agency as well? The ladies usually guess they are not the only brides their men writing to. But they also truly understand that as for themselves as for their men it’s a lifetime decision and the right choice can be vitally important. That’s why all the ladies try to be as much sincere as possible. They all believe in their uniqueness and really hope their true nature and personality are going to work. Many of them the same as their men believe that they can truly determine a "soul mate" from letters but still the face-to-face date is needed to find the personal love chemistry.

So, the best advice here can be – just listen to your heart. And if it says that this is the special person you were looking for to get merry with, than go for it. But if there still some little doubts, and you want some insurance, than choose another one female whom you find interesting and you feel you would like to know her better. And than, while visiting your Beautiful girls you can also have another date that will make yourself comfortable and confident with your decision.

6 Secrets to Be the Nice Guy Women Want

2012-02-18T08:32:00.000-08:00

Sure you're nice - most people are. So what?

This quality is one that reflects your feeling that you're a man worth knowing and you deserve women's attention. But do you really believe that women pay attention to what you think you deserve?

Being nice is not enough. Okay, fine, you're nice, but you also need to be interesting.Unfortunately, "nice guy" equates to wimp/dweeb in too many people's minds. Believe me: you don't have to be a jerk to attract women!

As a matter of fact, women did not like jerks or aggressive men. They are attracted by challenging,
interesting guys. That's all. You can be interesting, challenging and still a nice man. Be yourself but keep in mind these significant things that can make the difference between a regular nice guy and a successful one:

1. Women LOVE a man who is a CHALLENGE... the quickest and easiest way I've ever heard to let a
woman know that YOU are the guy she should be pursuing is to let women know you are successful
with women. Be a nice guy, but one that is desirable. :)

2. The MOST EFFECTIVE way to approach a woman and spark her attraction for you is giving her a
COMPLIMENT on her looks. This can be suicidal if done wrong... but just find something at her what
you really think is special, different about her. You give attention, and you will get attention in return!

3. Not being aggressive doesn't mean that you have to wait for madam perfection to drop into your lap (which you as a "nice guy" deserve by definition, of course). You have to take some initiative. BE SELF-CONFIDENT (but not really cocky) and show some honest interest in something about a woman.

4. The best selling genre of books in the world is romance novels... because women LOVE romance.
So don't talk about sport for God seek! If you are not the type of man that reads poetry or is able to talk about moon or about the smell of burned tree leafs, don't do it. You'll look unnatural. But taking your date in a romantic place, offering her a nice flower, enjoying some good music or even touching her hand in a delicate way is very romantic.

5. And don't talk only about you. You want her to listen to you? Then first listen carefully to her when she needs to be heard. The most effective way to be interesting is asking questions and… listens. Only try and you'll see. :)

Keep in mind that often (not always, but very often) when a woman tells you about a problem she's having, she's not looking to you for the solution. What? That doesn't make sense? What she's often looking for is comfort and reassurance and knowing that YOU'RE THERE.

6. One of the most important things in dating is to approach women that are interested in dating and women that seem to be interested in you. Don't try to sell candies to someone that is looking for peanuts and don't waste your time with women that are still affected by their ex long term relationships. You don't want to be just a shoulder to cry?

You only live once, so live your life well!

Dissolve Problems And Transform Them Into Opportunities!

Are You A Caring Lover?

2012-02-16T23:57:00.000-08:00

What kind of lover you are? Do you care for your beloved? Or you are more concerned about what you get in love? Those who care in love always win at the end. Because their care shows in their character and they feel good that they care about someone.

Unless your love is not a synonym for physical relation, your love must transcend ordinary relationships. Let me give you an example. A mothers relation with her children is beyond and different from every other relationship. Similarly, if you truly love, you will care, because to love means to care. What about you? Are you a caring lover?

Let me ask you a simple question. Your darling has not bothered to call you for few days. What kind of ideas do you get? Your answer to this question will tell you a lot about your love. Do you suspect that he/she might have fallen in love with somebody else/ or that they are not bothered about you? Or that there may be something wrong, otherwise it is impossible that your lover will not call. Unless your answer is the last one, you need to rethink about your relationship and you may not call it as love.

To love means to give. Love demands that you keep your beloved happy. You forgive them for major blunders. You be with them through everything. Love means to become one with your sweetheart. Unless that happens, it is not love, but a pretense of love. If you love, you must care.

Divorce Advice, Where Can You Turn?

2012-02-14T09:28:00.000-08:00

Divorce is such a nasty thing and people should hate the destruction and harm that it does to everyone involved. The problem is that even people that hate it become victims of it inevitably. So there needs to be a source of divorce advice for those that are not using it selfishly as a way to "legitimately" escape a relationship for purely selfish reasons. Reasons like desiring more sexual conquest, or escape from something hard like a terminal illness in a spouse, or bad financial luck in a spouse, or simply lack of loyalty, and unwillingness to put in the effort that the normal hard work that a relationship takes.

People should not be rewarded for pettiness, selfishness, greed, shallow hearts, laziness, lust, deceit, and on and on. Therefore there needs to be divorce advice for both holding these people accountable and for protecting the people that are victimized by the cruelty of some. At this time advice that does these things is sadly very rare, and this is part of the reason why divorce is so rampant in today's society.

The 21 Basic Laws Of Successful Relationships.

When you think of victims most of the time your mind pictures a poor helpless middle-aged mother who has been abandoned by an evil "player" husband for a younger and less "used" woman. This victim chose out of love and loyalty to forgo the chance to better herself with an education and career to love and raise their children and bears the scars of this sacrifice literally and figuratively. While these scars of sacrifice should make her more sexy to a man who can see and understand what a gift to him they are, they do just the opposite, and he takes off. This is common and these women need good sound divorce advice for protection and to preserve their future.

Presently however this is becoming less and less typical now the opposite is true. The man who is loyal and working hard to raise his kids and provide for his family is the unattractive and boring one who gets dropped like a bad habit for a more exciting and dangerous man. These men, because this is a relatively new phenomena made possible in large part by the women's liberation movement (which had its good points, don't get me wrong), are in desperate need of good divorce advice because they find it harder to convince judges of their plight.

The good news is that good divorce is there to find for whatever case you may find yourself in. It is becoming more common too as the demand gets greater sadly. So there is hope you just need to do your homework and you will recover from this terrible time.

Dissolve Problems And Transform Them Into Opportunities!

Is It Marriage Or Prostitution

2012-02-11T22:35:00.000-08:00

It is said that prostitution is the oldest profession in the world. To prostitute means to give someone the right to use the body for a sum. Do all the prostitutes sell their bodies for money only? Some might be selling their body for food, or a gift or something else. So, we can say that prostitution means selling the right to use the body for something in exchange.

I want to talk about a marriage where a woman sold her body for money and also few other things. She is the heroine of this story and lives in a conservative society, where pretenses are at times more important than truth. Our heroine was in deep love with a married man but had no guts to say so. Therefore she agreed to marry the villain of this story, a man who proposed marriage in front of her father. While getting married to this person, she cheated him. She lied to him by hiding her real love. But that is not the point of my story. Let me come to the basics.

Our heroine was married to the man/villain in full public view, so she had no reason to deny that marriage unless she divorced him. She never loved him, but carried on with this man and let him brutalize her in all the ways possible. At times, he raped her seven to eight times a night. Was this a marriage or did she sell herself like a prostitute for something?

Let me elaborate further. What did she get in return of giving away her body? Her parents had spent quite a lot of money on the wedding. If she divorced this man, her parents might have got a bad name in society. I am talking of conservative countries and not developed nations. So the first thing she gained by selling her body was the peace of mind her parents got by looking at their daughter. That peace was totally false, because the daughter was neither truthful to them nor to society. But even knowing all this, the parents had a peace of mind that the society thought about the daughter as a happily married woman. Let the reality be totally different. It were pretenses that mattered. So the first gain - False peace of mind for parents that society thought of the heroine as a happily married person.

There are many more things, all totally wrong that our heroine of the story got for selling her body. Let us look at some more. This girl had got a baby out of getting repeatedly raped by this man. The baby called this man/villain her father and it seems that the father loved the baby. Why and if it is really true, is known only to this man. But outwardly he showed love. A man who can brutally use a woman's body repeatedly, can love anything living is impossible to comprehend. But this was shown to the society. Our heroine got her second payment as a man called father for her daughter out of rape.

What else? This man/villain said that he had no one else except our heroine in the world to call as his own. He knew it very well that the heroine was not in love with him, but had married him under compulsion of so many other factors. But he emotionally blackmailed her saying that if she left him, who else was there for him? Please therefore stay with me, keep the pretense of a married couple in public and let me rape you whenever I wish to do. The third profit was emotionally giving into the blackmail of a brute.

Let me list one more gain, though there were many more. Our heroine had no strength of character or guts to come open and say that I want to separate. She did not want to face the possibility of living alone. She did not want to lose her respect in the society. So she continued. And the biggest gain? Before I tell you about that let me add something. Our heroine was in love with someone else as I told you in the beginning. This man wanted her to come to him and denounce the marriage to the brute. He was desperate for that because he could not tolerate the rapes. They were killing him. But if our heroine does that what would she tell her daughter when she grows up? She had no guts to tell her daughter the truth. So she continued prostituting herself not only in body but also in mind, character and truth. In the whole process, she managed to kill a person who was in deep love with her and could not tolerate the rapes. She gave him a bigger blow when he realized that she believed in living a liars life forever. This man got totally broken and might have killed himself, if God had not saved him. I wonder if our heroine, the brute or the parents will ever get any peace. Untruth never gives peace but shows the path to hell.

Who is a better person? A prostitute who openly trades or our heroine? Make your own decision.

A Smart Woman's Guide To Dating, Relationships & Break Ups.Click Here!

Bridesmaid Dress Conflicts and Resolving Them

2012-01-24T10:13:00.000-08:00

One of the biggest conflicts that happen when it comes
to a wedding is the one between brides and their
bridesmaids over the bridesmaids dresses. To help with
this problem, here are some tips on selecting
bridesmaids’ dresses.
Color - This is one thing that the bride should be
able to choose. But when you are choosing your color,
take into consideration your bridesmaids’ coloring.
Have a base color, but be willing to compromise on the
shade. The other thing that some brides do is to have
a rainbow wedding.

Style - This is something that your bridesmaids should
be able to help in choosing. Try not to choose a style
that is to garish or frilly. The best type of dress is
one that they can wear again to another formal dinner.

Remember, these dresses are dresses that your
bridesmaids will be paying for, and they should be
able to enjoy wearing them. So take that into
consideration and choose a style and color that will
make everyone happy.

You want to choose a style that will look good on all
of your bridesmaids and that enhance their best
features. When your bridesmaids are wearing dresses
that they like and they know that they look good in,
things will be a lot less stressful for everyone.

If you aren’t sure what type of dress will work for
everyone, talk to people at the bridal shops and they
will help you.

American Wedding Practices

2012-01-22T10:08:00.000-08:00

Living in the United States makes one feel free - free to do anything, free to live, free to love, free from traditions. While this is true, there are still many practices done during wedding that renders this memorable event with a distinct American touch. Here are some:

Starting from the engagement, Americans can think of unique ways to personalize their wedding. As there really isn't any engagement tradition, the more unique the marriage proposal is done, the better.

For most wedding preparations, the engaged couple visits their parents to inform them of their recent engagement.

At times, the engaged couple hosts an engagement party. The engagement party costs less than a wedding reception since most of the time, the menu will only include cocktails and hors d'oeuvres. Therefore, if the couple is on a tight budget, they can just invite more guests to the engagement party if they plan to limit the number of guests during the wedding.

Most wedding preparations have a bridal shower given by the maid of honor and the bridesmaids. The groom may also have a bachelor party the night before the wedding but he has to be careful not to drink too much.

Wedding invitations should include response cards to quickly inform the couple whether the person has accepted or declined the invitation. The wedding invitations should also be sent within four to six weeks before the event.

Usually, there is a rehearsal dinner in which the wedding party and guests came from far places to be present at the wedding attend. It was practiced that the groom's parents pay for this dinner.

A bridal luncheon may be hosted for the bride's attendants during the wedding day. However, time constraints may not permit this to be part of the schedule for the wedding day. Likewise, the groom may also host a groom's dinner for his groomsmen.

Interestingly, even if the couple is not very religious, they still prefer a religious ceremony. However, this may pose a problem since in America people of different faiths and religious backgrounds get married.

Even if there are few people who believe in bad luck, some couples still make sure that the groom does not see his bride until she starts waking on the aisle.

It is still practiced that the groom and his groomsmen enter the church through a side door. The bride will then walk down the aisle with her father. In some cases when both her father and stepfather brought up the bride, she may ask them both to escort her.

During a formal reception, there is usually a bridal table where the couple and the attendants sit. Also, food and drinks should be served as the guests appear at the reception.

Before, gift giving used to depend on what the guest will feel useful for the couple. Now, it is better to register for gifts so the guests will know what to bring that the couple will need.

Upon receiving an engagement or wedding gift, it is better to send a thank you note apart from saying "thank you" to the giver. This should be sent within two weeks upon receipt of the gift. Make a personalized thank you note, instead of using an impersonal generic thank you note.

These are just some American practices during weddings. Whether one chooses to this or prefers to have a very different wedding, what's more important is that American's still believe in the wedding vow, "For better or worse, 'til death do us part."

Accommodation Options For Your Honeymoon

2012-01-20T09:45:00.005-08:00

For those of you who are seeking peace and quiet on your honeymoon there are a variety of options available. Bed and breakfasts plus small inns offer great getaways and a chance to immerse you in more of the local area.

Many of these small inns were made around historic great houses on former plantations. These are often intimate properties that only host a handful of guests at a time. Here the two of you will be part of a small group of guests, and you'll get to know each other as husband and wife. Often the owners of the inn reside right on property, so you'll receive personal attention.

For some couples, the idea of real romance is a private villa, without any other guests. Its just the two of you alone, apart from the occasional visit by a cook or maid. They are there to help to meet your special requests, to introduce you to island cuisine, and to make you feel pampered. Italy, St. John, Jamaica and Barbados are always popular destinations for villa rentals.

Many resorts also offer villa rentals. These homes are located on the resort property. Guests can enjoy the security and services of the resort while at the same time having the space and facilities of a villa home. Here you can cook your own food and do what you want without being rushed or interrupted.

Let the hotel know when you make the reservation you will be celebrating your honeymoon. Many hotels like to recognize honeymooners. Some hotels offer a special gift or even a room upgrade if available. Remember, as much as you want to have a good time, the hotel also wants to make this an extra special trip for the two of you. What better way to get return visitors or referrals?

"Tools" For Picking-Up Girls

2011-12-19T04:15:00.000-08:00

We all know that approaching woman isn't easy. It can be embarrassing and downright difficult. But, if you know what you are doing and have faith in your own forces you can get the one you like.

Impressing a woman is not an easy task, especially if you don’t have a lot of experience with females. There are many components that go into impressing a woman.

If you want to learn how to impress a girl, then you should do your best to be positive. Keep in mind that smiles and jokes are great bonding mechanisms that you can use to impress a girl.

There is a charm and seductive attraction that some guys have, so they have all the girls they want. This magnet is called charisma, and it is very important if you want to attract the woman of your life. But, if this is a problem for you, you must try some tricks to pick-up the woman you want.
For example, use your dog to pick-up girls. You have a dog? Now its your chance. Take a walk with your dog on the place where you know your special one passes by every day. Any girl likes dogs. Small ones are very cute and the big ones make you look hot.

So, if you are with your dog out and suddenly your girl pass over. Make sure that she sees you. If it happens that your dog had a bad behavior and starts barking at her you might apologize and tell her to not take it personally. So, you can discus with her. Show her that your dog know some tricks and while your dog is sitting and rolling over you' re getting to know the girl.

Babies. Every woman love babies. Your friend is married and has a baby? Join your friend when he goes out with the baby and show interest by playing with the kid when she passes by you. Next day you can offer to watch out the baby for your friend and take him to a walk to show her you like kids. But make sure she has saw you in the day before with your friend to not think that the baby is yours. If the baby is crying when she passes by you, you might be lucky and she might offer her help to make the baby stop crying. So, you get to talk with her and may ask her for a
date.

Use some magic tricks to attract her. You are seeing her every day and you don't have the courage to talk to her. First of all, relax. One of the biggest turnoffs for women is a guy who’s uptight. Just relax and you’ll be fine. After you start talking with her use some magic tricks to impress her and attract her. You may say that you are good at magick and you are offering to guess her future by reading her hand. She'll definitely laugh but if she's ok with this you may tell her that she will have a glorious future.

Don't forget to make her laugh. Laughter is all you need to attract women easily and quickly. If you are able to make her laugh any time and any places it will be easier to you to get the woman you are looking after for some long time.

From Dating to Marriage- Make the Transition Online

2011-12-10T08:29:00.000-08:00

Want to get hitched? Try online dating

So, you have finally opened up to the idea of dating online and prospect for a relationship that will blossom into something fruitful, like marriage!

What we have explored up to now is the most important information you need to know. Now, lets dig a little deeper.

Here are some tips for a successful online dating experience.

Use utter special information. Of course, you should be practical in generous out special contact information. But otherwise, give out your likes and dislikes, your interests, and preferred books honestly. Members on the online service may look at your site and disappear uninterested if they see that your profile is just full of Ask Me descriptions and statements.

Okay, you might want to disappear additional information to those interested, but you have to give information on your profile that would show your best attributes.

You might want to add photographs to your profile. Some online sites have audio and videotape features where you can upload your clips. Instead of a dull profile with no movies or videotape or audio clips, why not try these features? It makes your profile personalized and interesting.

When surfing and chatting in an online singles site, you must not be rude or aggressive in your profile. duck also with swear or curse words. People are bowed off by insulting remarks.

Honesty is the best policy. Highlight the best characteristics that you have, but don't lie.

If you are actually passionate about something, say so. Do not veil the gear that you are very passionate about. If you actually like partying, say so. Pretending to be somebody you are not, won't help you get a time you like.

If it is available, try the site's voicemail services. inquiry the speech of a prospective partner is wonderful. You could sense the person's background by the way they communicate with you.

When somebody sends you an unsigned message, try to answer as quickly as you can. If you are decided in having online dates with the prospect of having fruitful relationships (and hopefully marriage), then you should be decided in replying to messages.

Be patient. You should take your time in decision the great partner, and not only in online services. It takes time for people to enlarge and have decided commitment to each other.

Always think optimistically. Keep thinking the best will happen.

If you are looking for a long-term relationship or marriage through online dating services, memorize that you should be unwearied and honest.

The next time you have questions regarding this subject, you can refer back to this article as a handy guide.

Emotional Infidelity: A KEY Tactic to Save the Marriage

2011-12-08T08:26:00.000-08:00

Hearing that your cheating spouse is “in love” with someone else is devastating. I hear often, “I can handle her having sex with someone else. I think I can live with that. But, for her to give herself emotionally and “love” someone else…man, that is hard.” (Feel free to substitute the word he for she in this article.)

What can you specifically do to increase the odds of saving the marriage?

So often the offended spouse reacts with intense feelings and pulls out all stops to “win her back.”

He applies pressure. Begs. Cajoles. Makes promises. Gets in her face. Sends flowers. Arranges for dates. Talks to her family and friends. Calls her on the phone. Asks questions… daily, sometimes hourly. He is on her like a fly on doo-doo.

It doesn’t work.Why? Well, for one reason she has found all the stimulation and excitement she supposedly needs in her new found “love.”

At a deeper level this is confusing enough for the cheating husband or cheating wife. Any additional input will be overwhelming and she is liable to close the door on the marriage even further. Plus, she is really looking for some stability, some solid centered core that will hold her firm when the wind of drama entices her and blows around her.

If you bombard her with your neediness, you are certainly not the person who can help her in ways she really seeks.

She also is liable to create a polarity and begin comparing you to him. With your neediness dripping all over you, you don’t stand a very good chance of coming out on top. Sorry!

Here’s a tactic that helps solve the dilemma and gives you a greater chance of saving the marriage.It’s called “back off!”

Stop pressing. Slow down the pace. Be silent – most of the time. Stop making requests. Stop asking questions. Stop trying to wiggle out some assurance. Stop being a pain!

Remember, this “in love” state will fade. You need to have the confidence that it will. You need patience. The relationship will run its course.

She needs the space. She needs some quiet moments to truly hear herself and face the emptiness within. There will be a voice within her that says, “This will not last. Is this what I really want? At some time I must live in the real world. Where is this taking me? Is this where I really want to go? Why am I so dependent on him? Why do I feel this empty pit in my stomach when I’m not with him? What does this say about me?”

This is her opportunity to learn about TRUE love. Don’t get in her way.

I know. I know. This is easier said than done. But, you must do it. It is vitally important that you learn to quiet yourself, control yourself and keep on the straight and narrow path.

At this point with those I coach, I teach them a skill called "charging neutral" to help "back off." Use that skill.This will take some effort. It might take some coaching or therapy. It most likely will demand that you get to know yourself better, that you gain more confidence in you – apart from what she does with him – that you build a strong foundation under yourself that can weather any storm.

This is your opportunity to grow to another level.

Oh, by the way. She will notice! And….she might like it.

Backing off does not mean that you don’t have anything to do with her. Quite the contrary. You want to maintain your contact with her, but it will be QUALITY contact. It will be contact that does honor to you, confronts her with the reality of her decisions and works toward resolution for the marriage.

Summary: Less often means more when facing emotional infidelity. Learning a specific skill such as "backing off" enhances one's chance to save the marriage.

Bridal Set a gift for a lifetime

2011-12-06T08:18:00.000-08:00

Being a bride is the most memorable occasion in a woman’s life. On the special day, every bride wants to look her best and takes care that everything about her is perfect. The glow on the bride’s face is natural and comes from the happiness within. It all starts with those nice smelling bathing salts, the herbal treatments, the beautifully created wedding dress, the coiffured tresses, the enhancement of the facial features with the required make up, and finally the perfect jewelry to adorn the feminity of the bride, completes the bridal
look.

The perfection of her look depends on finding the bridal set perfect bridal jewelry. The bride may find a perfect necklace to wear but may not find the matching earrings or the right bangles or bracelet or even ring to go with it. A bridal set resolves this problem and saves a lot of time. Bridal sets are jewelry made with the intention of putting together everything for that special occasion. A bridal set comprises of a necklace, earrings, bangles/bracelets, and a ring that match and go well together. All a bride needs to do is select the bridal set that goes with her look on the wedding day.

These bridal sets come in a variety of metals, like gold, silver, white gold, and platinum. There are plain precious metal bridal sets and there are bridal sets set with precious stones, like diamonds, rubies, emeralds, sapphires etc. The choice of the type of bridal set depends on the expense and the affordability of the bride.

If you are the bride, you will have to take utmost care in selecting the bridal set. First thing is the set of course, but don’t buy it just because you love the jewelry set. The bridal set by itself may be beautiful, but you must see if it matches your dress. Even a most expensive and beautiful wedding gown can look bad if worn with the wrong bridal set. You don’t want any such thing to mar the occasion. Look into all factors when selecting the bridal set, like the style, quality and affordability.

Bridal sets look good because they were meant to be used together. All major jewelers stock several styles of bridal sets to suit all budgets. You can even use your bridal set after the wedding day. When going out on those romantic dinners, you can wear just your earrings or you can choose to wear just the bracelet at times, or even the necklace. Just because it is a bridal set, you don’t have to keep it aside like you do the wedding dress. How would it feel wearing that jewelry on your first anniversary and reliving the special moments.

Make sure the bridal set does not completely overshadow the wedding gown. The bridal set should fit in the theme of the wedding. If the wedding dress is made up of a certain type of crystals, then your bridal set cannot be of pearls. Keep in mind the overall look when buying jewelry for the big day. Once that is taken care of, all you need to do is experience the feeling of satisfaction and thrill with the numerous compliments coming your way.