1. God’s message to parents would be clear and communicated well.
2. My heart would be receptive to the Holy Spirit.
3. That the parents would be open to hearing from the Holy Spirit.
4. That God would be glorified.

Thank you so much.

And if you have an extra moment to pray, I would really appreciate a few more:

1. For specific guidance and encouragement from the Lord to me about my writing career/ministry.
2. For provision.
3. That I’d be an in-the-moment parent, very available to my kids.
4. For true, deep rest, and perspective.

Thank you.

What would it look like for you to live uncaged in 2012?

It would look bold. I would live, fearless. It would be a year of forward movement, without me getting in my own way.

What has prevented you from living a truly free and unencumbered life in the past?

I think just alot of second guessing and maybe even, too much self-evaluation. I’ve realized, lately, that at some point I have to just step forward, messy as I am, and get out there. I am prevented from this when I spend too much time thinking about my fears and insecurities.

Give my readers advice. What’s one practical thing they can do this year to live uncaged? (This can be silly like dancing in the rain or serious like eat more chocolate.)

Get over yourself. It’s what I advise myself. If that sounds harsh, maybe this will sound better: Offer yourself some grace and start moving.

Who in your life is an excellent example of living uncaged? Why?

My daughter lives, uncaged. She has the innocence of childhood, the unfiltered love for Jesus, and the comfortability in her own skin. Oh, that those things would never go away.

If you could design a Live Uncaged sweatshirt, what would it look like?

This is hard, because…well…I only really create things with words. Maybe a picture of something that lives outside of bars, because that’s what living uncaged really looks like.

To celebrate, I’m doing two cool things.

1. I’m hosting a “ask anything” chat over at my facebook page, Wednesday February 1st from 2:00–3:30. Stop on by and ask a question. Please share this with anyone who might be interested in this topic. Here’s a sample tweet: Join the Beautiful Battle party. http://on.fb.me/dPHQri Ask @MaryDeMuth about spiritual warfare. 2/1, 2-3:30 CST
2. Here on this blog I’m hosting a contest to give away 5 copies of Beautiful Battle. Not only that, but the five winners get to select another one of my books (any one), and I’ll send both autographed. Here’s the contest. Submit your original creative response to the topic of Beautiful Battle (You don’t need to read it to submit.) This can be a new book cover, a song, a video, a new book trailer, an infographic, a poem, a photo, a drawing, a cartoon–basically ANYTHING you can create. See specific instructions at the end of this post.

To help you along, here are my two trailers for the book, followed by an original poem by a New Zealand poet for Beautiful Battle’s release! So cool!First, here’s a story that helped me understand the true nature of our battle, involving one of our children when we lived in France:

Beautiful Battle: 2 from Ufilmhouse.com on Vimeo.

And this second video is a segment about my heart–the deeper whys behind the book. Truth: God is truly bigger than the boogeyman!

Beautiful Battle: 1 from Ufilmhouse.com on Vimeo.

Here’s David Andrews’ poem:

Beautiful Battle

In this beautiful battle

Where you contend for me

In a war behind my eyes

That I often fail to see

In this beautiful battle

Remind me I am free

As I put on your light armor

Darkness stops then flees

In this beautiful battle

I am safe from all harm

You shelter me with your love

And hide me in your arms

In this beautiful battle

You speak to me from above

You tell me I am beautiful

I feel your extravagant love

In this beautiful battle

Where you captivate my heart

Your love and grace define me

As I become your work of art

© Poetry in Motion

David Andrews writes for Poetry in Motion.  His writing is an expression of his faith in a world full of paradox. He is currently working on his first book of poetry which is due to be published this year. David is married with three sons and lives in Wellington, New Zealand.

Would you be so kind to share this contest with others? Here is the permalink: http://www.marydemuth.com/?p=12665

Or you can tweet it this way: Beautiful Battle creative contest. Put on your artsy cap & win books! #BeautifulBattle http://www.marydemuth.com/?p=12665

To enter:

Here’s the skinny. To enter to win, please attach your entry in the comments section. If you have issues with making that work (usually it’s fine but sometimes it’s buggy), then simply put the entry on your blog and place a link in your comment. Also remember to add your email address like this: mary @ MaryDeMuth.com. That way spammers won’t find you, but I’ll be able to notify if you’ve won. I have a committee of sweet volunteers who will vote. Winners will be announced on my birthday, February 10th.

So be creative! I can’t wait to see what you come up with!

Watching the Tree Limbs and Wishing on Dandelions were my first PUBLISHED novels, via NavPress publishing. I wrote those books primarily when we lived in France. I wanted to show the progression of healing from childhood sexual abuse through the power of a page-turning story. The first book is about Mara, a girl who is being abused in terrible ways, and God’s surprising plan to rescue and heal her. The second book looks at the girl as she turns 17 and how it affects the way she views her relationship with boys. I do have a third book in mind for the series, but it’s in the outline stage and is not completed.

The first novel I ever wrote was The Quarryman’s Wife. It’s the story of my great grandmother, essentially, but fictionalized to make a good, heartwarming story. Augusta, in her grief, detaches from the lives of her children. The story is about her journey back to wholeness and toward the hearts of her children. This book has never previously published and is most likely the only time I’ll write historical fiction.

I’m very, very pleased with CreateSpace. Wow. Very efficient, affordable, and an easy process. If you’d like to read all my posts about how to upload your own book, click here.

In the meantime, here’s how you can order these books:

You can order The Quarryman’s Wife in paperback here. (In a few days all the books will be available on Amazon.)

Order Watching the Tree Limbs here.

Order Wishing on Dandelions (its sequel) here.

Click the box below to start your own journey of print on demand publishing:

(By the way, if you’re wondering, Shelley and I share the same father. We weren’t raised together and are a decade apart. She’s bohemian, smart, and deeply dedicated to her family. I love her!) So, here’s Shelley!

What would it look like for you to live uncaged in 2012?

In my mind, it would mean doing all the things I dream of doing, and in a way that makes people happy and appreciated along the way.

What has prevented you from living a truly free and unencumbered life in the past?

I feel like it is most likely a lack of confidence, in myself, in what gifts God has given me, and in relationships around me.

Give my readers advice. What’s one practical thing they can do this year to live uncaged? (This can be silly like dancing in the rain or serious like eat more chocolate.)

Be supported! Be known! Find someone who you can confide in- someone that will be encouraging and challenging, someone whose perspective you trust.

Who in your life is an excellent example of living uncaged? Why?

I think kids are a great example of living uncaged, for the most part. They tend to know what they want, love wholeheartedly, dream big and take chances.

If you could design a Live Uncaged sweatshirt, what would it look like?

It would be a charcoal hoodie with a skeleton key on it with the words “Living Uncaged” beneath it.

You may know me as a driven person. I certainly know myself this way. I don’t like that, and I’m hoping to change more and more, but there it is. So the thing she asked me to do was to recount my year and look at the things I tried to initiate as well as the surprised God brought about.

After I read both lists, I was both shocked and humbled. Here they are:

Things I tried very hard to make happen:

1. Launch The Muir House in such a way that it would sell well. (It didn’t, though Zondervan did a great job of creating a page for the book on my facebook page and sent out lots of influencer copies.)
2. Advertising on MaryDeMuth.com. It’s been a fairly successful endeavor, but not as consistent as I’d like.
3. Sent a letter to my first stepfather in hopes of clarifying some memories, but received nothing back. Yet another dead end on some loose ends I can’t seem to tie up.
4. Tried affiliate marketing. Pretty much the same result as advertising.
5. Created several ebooks and a few print books. I’ve been mildly successful.
6. Attempted to pitch and sell fiction again. I do believe I’ll write it again, but the timing’s not right.
7. Tried to figure out SEO. Made several posts optimized on MaryDeMuth.com. Saw absolutely no return for that labor.
8. Tried to reignite a couple friendships, but they didn’t work out.
9. Tried to start a memoir about my father, but every time I researched and sat down to write it, a huge blanket of depression descended over me. I abandoned the project until I feel strong enough to tackle it in the future.
10. Advertised 11 Secrets to Getting Published through an email list that cost way too much and had very little result. (Ouch.)
11. Tried a chiropractor. The whole process just freaked me out.
12. Tried to write a short novella based on The Muir House, but the time of year (Christmas) and my schedule wouldn’t allow it.
13. Uploaded The Quarryman’s Wife as an ebook, then re-read it and caught way too many embarrassing errors. Yikes! Note to self: edit and re-edit and hire someone else! (Yes, it’s fixed.)
14. Paid to have a forum put up on my site. Big disaster. Money spent for no return. (Golly, I hate that!)
15. Thought Jesusy would be a great title for my growth book until we polled my readers. They HATED it. Back to the drawing board.

Things God orchestrated in 2011

1. Gave me a sweet time with my sister, her hubby and my nephews in Washington.
2. Introduced me to Michele Perry, author of Love Has a Face. Meeting her had a huge impact on my faith and the way I view my walk with God.
3. Orchestrated a nonfiction book contract with Thomas Neslon. I absolutely did very little to make that happen. (A huge nod to my agent Esther, and to Bryan Norman, my editor there for believing in me.)
4. Provided a scholarship to attend the Relevant conference in October. (And this year, I’ll be a speaker!)
5. Gave our family a sweet vacation spot in Colorado that we could afford. Our family had an amazing week of outdoor beauty and reconnection.
6. Provided a dear friend and photographer who took our family pictures this year for free.
7. Reminded me of my eldest daughter’s skills and married that to my need for an assistant. Together we make a formidable force. She gets paid (something she needs) and I get assisted!
8. Created fans for Beautiful Battle without me asking or seeking or trying. Folks are already reviewing the book and hollering about it without me having to ask.
9. Inspired me to launch Write Uncaged after a stint at the Relevant conference where I learned that I could actually find income sources by teaching others.
10. Approached by a pastor who watched me speak at the Christian Book Expo a few years ago (about parenting) and asked me to do a parenting conference in February this year. I did no finagling to find this opportunity. If you’d like to listen to the podcast, you can here.
11.  Appeared on The 700 Club, telling my thin place story. I honestly don’t know how they found me.
12. Created a deep sense of camaraderie among my senior girls discipleship group. That kind of group is rare and beautiful.
13. Completed Beautiful Battle on the strength of some friends’ ardent prayers. That was a hard book to write.
14. Opened up two very fruitful speaking opportunities in California and Indiana, where I felt God truly move through me to touch women’s lives.
15. Approached to speak at the Orange County Christian Writers Conference about memoir. While there, had the opportunity to be coached by Alice Crider. Her words helped reorient my heart and perspective.
16. Provided for my business.
17. Connected me to an excellent accountant after my bookkeeper retired. And he saved me a lot of money immediately.
18. Provided a full tuition ride for Sophie for the college she wanted to attend.
19. Connected me to a group of young bloggers/marketers that ended up creating a new kind of book tour for The Muir House.
20. Attended Catalyst Dallas, which showed me there were speakers out there who spoke like me—more gut honest and raw. This greatly encouraged me.
21. Approached by Faith Village to be a regular blogger. Totally unexpected.
22. Guest posted on Michael Hyatt’s blog a few times. Always a grace encounter!
23. Asked to write a devotional for iShine ministries, which brought in much needed income.
24. Changed from Turning Trials to Triumph to Live Uncaged. I went through a long process to figure that out, but ultimately God whispered the Live Uncaged to me. It fits. It so fits.
25. Provided much needed business and life coaching through Denise Martin at Bridgelite.
26. Kept putting people in my life in random ways that helped me see that abundance lurked on the horizon.
27. Kept me connected to Randy Ingermanson who has helped me tremendously in thinking strategically about my web presence and time management.
28. Provided a husband who cheerleads me in my work.
29. Provided for our son Aidan to go to Ghana this last summer.
30. Provided an excellent surgeon for my grandmother who has stomach cancer. They removed it without having to remove her stomach.
31. Gave me the words to write my growth book with Thomas Nelson. Also not an easy book to write (or live out.)
32. Approached to be a part of a new business for writers. Looks to launch this year sometime! Excited!

What I Realized

• God did far more initiating (with success) than I did. And His God-incidences were far more interesting and fun than my drudgery.
• Why in the world do I fret so much? What is it about me that strives and tries and thinks that my efforts amount to much? Am I that crazy?
• There is peace in letting go of the reins of my career. God obviously knows better than I do.
• A caveat: Just because some of the God things resulted in cool things and some of my things resulted in failure, doesn’t mean that’s always the way things work. Sometimes God leads us into situations that look like failure in order to teach us something. And sometimes our own us-inspired victories have lessons aplenty. The key is resting in God’s sovereign plan, however that may unfold, and entrust the results to Him.
• What I do in my own effort apart from God profits me nothing.
• It’s vitally important to seek God in everything I do.
• Simply moving forward with impatience can bring potential disaster.
• God’s surprises often involved people and relationships.
• God will equip us if we open our eyes to the experts He sends our way.
• I can trust God. Scheming is for the birds!

I’d like you to try this exercise and get back to me in the comments section. How has this exercise shocked you? Changed you? Moved you? Convicted you?

We’ve known each other a few years now, and I’m thankful to call him friend. Here’s Thomas!

What would it look like for you to live uncaged in 2012?

Living uncaged for me would be living a life without fear. Making decision based on what the right thing to do was not the safe thing.  It is all the little fears that bind together to form a the wires of our cages. Any one of them is no big deal but together they cripple us.  

What has prevented you from living a truly free and unencumbered life in the past?

Fear of being hurt again like I have been hurt in the past. A lack of emotional trust in God to be willing to take little steps of faith. My mind trusts God and bullies my heart into trusting Him in the big things of life. But my mind doesn’t have the energy left force my heart to trust God in the little things. I think the point of the Gospel is for the heart to be the source of trust and for that trust to trickle up to the brain. I don’t have that kind of trust but I want to.

Give my readers advice. What’s one practical thing they can do this year to live uncaged? (This can be silly like dancing in the rain or serious like eat more chocolate.)

Find the one little thing that you’ve been avoiding and do it. If you focus on just one little cage bar it is not hard to break. That one little act will bring a small degree of freedom and a large degree of hope. In short, find the one thing in the world you are afraid to do and then do that thing.

Who in your life is an excellent example of living uncaged? Why?

My sister. She knows how to dance like no one is watching.

If you could design a Live Uncaged sweatshirt, what would it look like?

A cage with a bomb going off inside breaking it open. Either that or a cage with a ninja breaking it open. Or perhaps a ninja using a bomb to demolish the cage completely. Yeah, i would probably buy that kind of sweatshirt.

Here’s a picture of two of our gatherings.

The gal on the far left with the gorgeous blond hair is Katy Gedney. I thought of her this morning while I read through a decorating magazine (my private addiction…I need a 12 step program, folks.) I remembered her home in Seattle when I first visited it. She and her husband Eric had purchased a fixer upper, an old bungalow (the style I still consider the most beautiful architecture in the world). They’d stripped, painted, and created an amazing home from a blank, old palate.

But what inspired me about her home was the creativity seeping out of every nook and cranny. She had her own paintings displayed. They’d chosen unconventional colors for cabinets. Even her cooking was wildly creative and infused with unique abandon. I loved visiting her there. And every time I left, I felt a sense of deep inspiration to make my home reflect our family’s creativity.

That moment seeing her home sticks to my ribs today. I want to live that way, folks. Do you? To be uncaged even in your home? Who says we all have to have brown or white cabinets? Who dictates we must put art in a certain place? Why can’t we be fully ourselves in our homes, breaking convention simply because we want to.

I wish everyone knew my dear friend Katy and saw the world from her artistic perspective. She is beautiful inside and out. My only regret is that we no longer live close to each other. I can’t drop by for tea and scones. But we still keep in touch. And I wanted to write this post as a tribute to her creativity and beauty. I love you, Katy.

Q4u: Who inspires you to think differently? To be creative? Why?

Let that sink way deep into your marrow today. Choose to believe it. He sees. He knows. He is available.

I learned that last week when I received a surprise package in the mail. It was from one of my readers, and it contained a beautifully sewn purse, along with life-giving words.

Here’s the interior of the purse:

And here’s a detail of the stitching:

She wrote that the straight stitching was “for the path He calls us all to walk as we follow. The zigzag was “for the mountains and valleys in life that refine us. The stitching you see here that looks like a maze was for “the craziness life throws at us, the flexibility we gain and understanding for others.” And the spirals (not shown) were for “our walk as we move even closer to Him.”

Thank You Jesus for seeing. For knowing how much a tangible, handmade gift would encourage me.

Q4u: What was the most outrageous gift someone gave you? Or what’s the most outrageous gift you’ve given?

Which is super cool because I dedicated the book to her and my friend Jodi. The inscription reads:

To Jodi Vinson and Kimberly Baker, beautiful women who deliberately prayed me through.

The two of them shared great books with me and truly committed to praying for me through the entire writing process. This book is a result of their hard-fought prayers.

I’d like to share my heart about this book. First, here’s a story that helped me understand the true nature of our battle, involving one of our children when we lived in France:

Beautiful Battle: 2 from Ufilmhouse.com on Vimeo.

And this second video is a segment about my heart–the deeper whys behind the book. Truth: God is truly bigger than the boogeyman!

Beautiful Battle: 1 from Ufilmhouse.com on Vimeo.

Some cool endorsements for Beautiful Battle:

“Not just anyone can, or should, write a book on Spiritual Warfare. DeMuth demonstrates her capacity not by reveling in her victories but by revealing her battle scars. This is bloody, beautiful, truth.” Nicole Johnson, dramatist, author

“Beautiful Battle is a must-read for every woman. Mary DeMuth artfully explains the reality of spiritual warfare in easy to understand terms teaching us to claim the victory that is ours in Christ without inciting fear or minimizing the realities of Satan’s work in this world. She gently and confidently reminds us of the ever important truth that God is bigger. I plan to read this book again and again.”   Shannon Primicerio, author of The Divine Dance and nine other books to teens

“The richness of Beautiful Battle is not simply in the way Mary DeMuth crafts words…but in the reminder of a powerful God who always wins. I have taken much away from this inspiring, important book–one every believer should read.” Lisa Whittle speaker, advocate, Barnabooks author of {w}hole

“Mary DeMuth writes about the spiritual world in a compelling, insightful way. She shares how to be a wise warrior who is neither oblivious to the battle around us nor overwhelmed by it. In her characteristically courageous style, Mary fights back the darkness on behalf of her sisters everywhere and sheds new light for all of us on this much-needed topic.  Holley Gerth, author of God’s Heart for You

“In Beautiful Battle Mary DeMuth takes the mystery out of understanding the daily fight in the life of the believer. Empowering us with the inside secrets of spiritual warfare, she opens our eyes to more fully understand what is taking place where our eyes cannot see. This book is a powerful tool for the believer wanting to go deeper than the average Christian dares to go.”  Lynn Cowell, Proverbs 31 speaker and author of His Revolutionary Love

If you’re interested you can order Beautiful Battle here. Or head on out to any local bookstore and ask for it (kindly).

I’m excited to share Caitlin Muir’s answers to my live uncaged questions. She works for Author Media and blogs about the single life.

I’m offering another necklace giveaway! Yes! (And if you’re a boy, please enter because you could give this as a gift). This is another offering from Barberry and Lace. Here’s a pic:

To win, please answer the question at the bottom. Get more entries if you tweet or facebook a link back to this post. Thanks!

Here are my questions, and Caitlin’s answers follow close behind.

1. What would it look like for you to live uncaged in 2012?
2. What has prevented you from living a truly free and unencumbered life in the past?
3. Give my readers advice. What’s one practical thing they can do this year to live uncaged? (This can be silly like dancing in the rain or serious like eat more chocolate.)
4. Who in your life is an excellent example of living uncaged? Why?
5. If you could design a Live Uncaged sweatshirt, what would it look like?

1. I think that living a “safe” life ends up smothering your soul. It may be comfortable at first, but slowly and surely, the safeguards you make will kill you. Stepping out in faith, trying new things, delighting in a rediscovered passion, those are the things that unwrap your soul and let it breathe again. In 2012, it means that I’m stepping away from my fears and insecurities. I’m getting involved in comment, taking chances with my writing, and getting serious about what it means to be a follower of Jesus.

2. Growing up, I believed a lot of lies. I had believed that just because I didn’t look like a model, people wouldn’t want to be my friend. I thought that even though I knew God offered grace, that His followers wouldn’t offer the same grace. There were many whispered lies that kept me from living vibrantly. Fear of rejection firmly being on the top of my list and it smothered me. It wasn’t until I started realizing that God loved me (and actually liked me!) that I was able to start replacing those lies with God’s truth. It’s been a life changing experience. Knowing that someone loves you, flaws and all, gives a deep feeling of security. And once you have that security, watch out! The world is yours to be enjoyed.

3. Look in the mirror. Tell yourself that God loves you. If that seems cliched, tell yourself that He not only loves you but He likes you as well. Then make a list of things you want to do before you get old or boring. They can be as serious or as whimsical as you desire. Dare to cross them off. Need starters? Here’s my list of things I’m working on before I’m old/boring/30 (whichever comes first).

4. My younger sister Laura is a good example of someone who is living uncaged. When she started dating her husband, he gave her the support she needed to start living adventurously. She glows. Since she’s met her husband, she’s bought a motorcycle, climbed a mountain, and conquered her fear of the water so she could go snorkeling in Hawaii. While other wives are staying at home while their husbands are “off on an adventure with the boys”, my sister is out there having adventures with her husband. I think that’s pretty awesome.

5. I’m not a huge fan of sweatshirts. But if I had to design one, it would be fitted, more of a tunic length, and have a hood like this. I don’t know if you want to use that link or not. Someone forgot their pants.

Bio – Caitlin is a 20-something who writes about faith, love, and social media. Her motto is “Life is an adventure given to you by God – enjoy it!” When she’s not off adventuring in her convertible, she can be found reading, writing, or getting herself in all sort of mischief. You can connect with her at CaitlinMuir.com or follow her on Twitter here.

…

To win the necklace, answer this question:

How have you played it safe, and how will you break away from that in 2012?

BE SURE YOU PUT YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS in your entry (like this: mary @ marydemuth dot com). Your answer gets one entry. If you tweet about it, write “I tweeted” as another comment for another entry. If you facebooked, do the same thing. (Keep adding your address!) I’ll pick a winner on Monday.

As you might remember, my picture was lilacs in full, amazing bloom. They symbolize for me abundance and new, fragrant life.

Several days ago, I sent in my photo to Canvas People, my go-to folks for really cool canvas prints. They still offered an 8×10 for free, so I uploaded the lilacs pic, and waited.

My picture came in the mail this week! Want to see it?

Right now it sits on my desk, but I’m thinking of hanging it up in my office eye level so I can remember what it represents to me. As you may have gathered from some of my recent posts, I’m under several pressing deadlines right now and I’m fighting to keep my joy.

So if you’d like a tangible representation of your picture of the year and want to canvas-ize it. Here’s a click-through coupon so you can get it free:

I felt distant from Jesus. Angry. Alone. Pressed in on. In shoulder/neck pain.

I told my hubby I’d take the day off, but as I sat down to my computer, tasks screamed my name. So I worked. I shouldn’t have, but I did.

And in the middle of that chaos of tasks, I received an email from my friend Heidi in Mexico. She told me about a song her worship leader from their home church had written that week. She thought it might bless me. I clicked through and watched this:

And I cried. With fatigue. With longing. With joy. With pain. All my life seemed to pivot in that moment. Heidi listened to the Spirit, and He whispered my name to her. The song she sent was both a wake up call and a salve. It helps me remember that God sees, and all this effort on my part is nothing without Him.

Q4u: When has God used a friend to deeply encourage you?

What would it look like for you to live uncaged in 2012?

Living uncaged in 2012 is doing more of what I’m good at and enjoy. I’ve done a good job of that over the years, but it’s time to get better. I’ll have more free time to spend with family and friends  and love 100% of my business.
What has prevented you from living a truly free and unencumbered life in the past?

Fear, anxiety, voices inside my head, family who thought I was crazy, cultural norms. The better question is, what hasn’t prevented me from living the life of adventure I’ve always craved?

Give my readers advice. What’s one practical thing they can do this year to live uncaged? (This can be silly like dancing in the rain or serious like eat more chocolate.)

Every day, do something that scares you. It could be big, like starting your dream business, or small, like standing in the shower while it warms up.

Who in your life is an excellent example of living uncaged? Why?

My little brother has done a great job of living uncaged. I don’t believe anyone who says they don’t care what others think, but he’s pretty close to living that. He’s done his own thing, and loves his work and life.

If you could design a Live Uncaged sweatshirt, what would it look like?

It’d signify possibilities and wide open spaces. There’s no one way to arrive at any solution. The journey is what makes the solution worth finding.

I’m so excited for you to meet them. Here are Heidi’s honest and awesome answers to my live uncaged questions:

What would it look like to live uncaged in 2012?

Living uncaged in 2010 for me would take on the appearance of no inhibitions.  I used to live in the great northwest in a small town with wildlife all around and the picture that comes to mind for me is that of a river otter.  If you have ever watched them they give the appearance of being carefree, unconcerned with what the other otters think as well as a focus on living and enjoying each and every moment. 

What has prevented you from living a truly free and unencumbered life in the past?

I tend to be a practical, task oriented person and sometimes I miss the moments for the focus on the job.  God has brought me to a new place, a new country actually and with that it is almost like I can have a clean slate and lay aside the old patterns, the old ways others expected me to be and truly focus on living each moment that my creator has given me.

Give my readers advice.  What’s one practical thing they can do this year to live uncaged?

Our pastor back in Idaho once said “If you are ready for Jesus to come back, what are you doing about it?”  I want to be about that kind of business.  The ability to freely lay aside my agenda when situations are presented to me to share the love of Christ or simply give that cup of cool water to those who are thirsty and not say,”I’ll be there in a moment just wait.”  I guess the short of the long would be laying aside my agenda, taking up my Father’s and living daily in the joy of making that choice.  Before, what has kept me from this has always been a focus on “self”, my agenda, my fear of failing or being rejected.  My focus, if I keep it on my savior then it is harder to focus on self and all that self wants, and then be free to live uncaged in the light of the cross and what Christ has done for me.  My advice would be to spend 2012 being about the Father’s business and it will be the most challenging, wild, yet totally satisfying year you have had.

Who is an example of living uncaged?

An example of living uncaged would be my husband.  Being new to the full-time missions field, all kinds of things come at you on a daily and sometimes moment by moment basis.  Physical things like drinking bad water and getting sick, to ½ the roof of your house blowing off in a storm.  Relational things like being met with open hostility by those who were supposed to be excited that you are here and the spiritual of at times crying out to God asking “why am I here?”.  In all these situations I have seen my husband press through, persevere and run the race set before him.  It does not mean that walls and bars have not appeared- it means when the trials have come and at times the walls have come up, I see him press into the word of God.  I have seen him look at our situations, our responses and our hearts and line them up with the word of God.  And what does not match gets purged.  Sometimes it happens quickly and at times it is a definite process.

If you could design a live uncaged t-shirt, what would it look like?

If I were to design a t-shirt that would depict how I see living uncaged it would be a picture of bars with human arms trying to pull open the bars.  There is no defined picture of the person, you just know it is one and then there are these power-lifter type arms (like someone off the Strength Team) on the bars with the normal arms pulling the bars open.  You see the bars bending in the picture as well as all the muscles in both sets of arms straining.

But even then, I had to push through. Even when recreation loomed, I had to make myself enjoy life.

Have you ever been there?

I’m thankful this time of trying and testing and doing too many new things has an end. I’m glad I don’t have to continue this pace forever. And I’m thankful more than anything for Jesus’ strength in my weakness.

Productivity is good, but it must not be at the expense of health, connection or our relationship with Him. So would you pray for me? I’ve got a book to write, talks to prepare, things to launch, and so much more. All in a compacted period of time. I’m Leia in the Star Wars trash compactor, feeling the push of the walls, helpless to stop them. I need your prayers to push through to the next phase.

Thanks for reading this disclosure post. Hopefully I’m not coming across as a Me Monster. I’m curious if you’ve struggled with periods of your life where “overwhelmed” describes your every day. If so, may Jesus hold you, heal you, give you strength and infuse in you a clear perspective of the next step.

But before we get to the interview, I’m giving away a Live Uncaged awesome necklace from Barberry and Lace. Here’s a picture.

To be entered, read this interview with Sean, then answer the question at the end of the post. If you tweet about the post, comment again for another entry. If you facebook, comment again for a third try. Thanks! Now to the interview:What would it look like for you to live uncaged in 2012?

One of C.S. Lewis’s characters in “The Great Divorce” spoke to an artist of what happens upon drinking of a fountain in heaven, “When you have drunk of it you forget all proprietorship in your own works. You enjoy them just as if they were someone else’s: without pride and without modesty.’

As a singer, songwriter, and worship leader in the local Church living uncaged would take on this form, living as if my life were “someone else’s” or “not my own”. I would take compliments, without feeding the hunger, of the prideful sinful, beast I call the “Approval Junkie”. I would respond to kind words in a healthy manner, without, discrediting ones kindness with an explanation of why they are wrong in an overmodest fashion. And, I would receive any criticism without making it a part of how I define the value of my self, or my art.

To live UnCaged would mean I would see myself through the lenses of Christ. Past mistakes, painful words, and all the wrong notes, would be overshadowed by knowing Jesus. The work of my hands, and the song on my lips, would be viewed without pride, and without modesty, knowing that they are The Lords work done in and through me.

 What has prevented you from living a truly free and unencumbered life in the past?

I have a reoccurring relationship with “fear of failure”. It drives me crazy, it causes me to overwork myself, rethink creative decisions, and keep a lot of things locked up. I think this comes from making comparisons between others and myself. I tend to make comparisons to other people’s way of song writing, musical production, achievements, methodology, or calling. The thing I try to remind myself of, is that in using someone else’s successes to create my definition of “failure” it keeps me from asking God what it is He wants me to do, and what work he is calling me too. Keep the conversation with God going, keep talking with Him and asking for His guidance. It is a far better relationship to foster.

Give my readers advice. What’s one practical thing they can do this year to live uncaged? (This can be silly like dancing in the rain or serious like eat more chocolate.)

Speaking as a creative. I suggest taking time to create, just to create. I tend to attach everything I do to some specific goal, or with some specific outcome in mind. But it can be really helpful to do something without any intention or goal, other than enjoying what happens. I recently bought watercolors and paper, having never painted I just wanted to do something different than normal; I threw color down at random, and had fun with it. If you are not a creative, find an activity to do free from any “goal” or “mark” take a walk, for the sake of enjoying walking. Take a drive without any destination in mind, just to enjoy the scenery.

Who in your life is an excellent example of living uncaged? Why?

My 8 year old daughter Vail is such an inspiration to me. She hasn’t made it to the place yet (I hope she never does) where she is aware of what is ‘normal’ by other peoples standards. If she wants to wear a huge Cinderella dress to go to the grocery store that’s what she does, and if you refer to her in her real name she will correct anyone by saying “My name is Cinderella”. If she wants to walk around in mid July singing Christmas carols that’s what she does. And she does at the top of her lungs!! I wish I had her carefree, childlike heart.

If you could design a Live Uncaged sweatshirt, what would it look like?

If I could design a live uncaged sweatshirt, I think I would let my daughter loose with some paint and tell her to go after it! But, one thing, for sure, it wouldn’t be a sweatshirt at all it would be a ¾ length sleeved 3 button Henley tee-shirt!

…

Thanks, Sean, for your insightful interview.

Now to those of you who would like to win the Live Uncaged necklace, answer this question:

What is your creative outlet?

If you’d like to be entered twice more, tweet about this post (then post another comment), and/or Facebook about this post (then post another comment). This increases your chances. I’ll pick a winner Friday morning.

I’ve long been feeling that my Live Uncaged site (here) has been a bit schizophrenic. I wrote about living an uncaged life while simultaneously blogging for up and coming writers. Some of you may not even know that I offered mentoring services at a site once called The Writing Spa.

Now everything is under one happy roof, er, cage. The cool thing? I’m starting a Write Uncaged newsletter. If you sign up, you’ll receive a tutorial about uploading e and POD books, complete with an editorial checklist. Click here and sign up for the Write Uncaged ezine if you’re interested. A new (free) ezine will arrive in your inbox the first of every month.

I also have a freebies page with several helpful articles, including one about zeroing out your inbox every month.

All my writing posts and products are now in one handy dandy place. In addition to my nonfiction and fiction tutorials, I have several new products there, including a less expensive template you can buy for your proposals, live audio teaching on proposals, and a new audio product about how to write a memoir.

I also have continued mentoring services for nonfiction and fiction with authors Leslie Wilson and Anne Mateer. Check out their services here.

Another super exciting part is that I’ll be offering 4 and 6-week classes on writing at Write Uncaged. These will be limited to 12 people per session, will involve great interaction, and several live teleseminars. Peruse the Write Uncaged Seminars here.

So there you have it! A whole new site. There’s information dating back several years (We imported all the posts from Wannabepublished). It’s a treasure trove of nearly everything you ever wanted to know about writing and publishing {but were afraid to ask.} This is a friendly, interactive, informative site. I hope it truly, truly blesses you.

Important side note: I’m extremely thankful for George Weis at Tekeme Studios for his Write Uncaged design. And also so grateful for Author Media for implementing the site in a timely, professional manner. I highly recommend both.

May 2012 be the year my friend trusts You more, believes You more, sacrifices for You and Your people more, hopes in You more. May this be a year of new things, new adventures, new risks, new relationships. I pray my friend will let go of the relational baggage of 2011 and release it to the wind, into Your capable hands. Help him/her to forgive freely, to turn his/her back on bitterness.

Open his/her heart right now. Unfold it. Root out the anger and feelings of inferiority. Eradicate the pain by healing it. Show him/her where to ask for forgiveness, when to be confident, when to humble him/herself. Grant new freedom, Jesus, especially in the dark recesses where Your light hasn’t shone. Give my friend deep bravery to open the door to the locked closets. In that light, Lord, shine Your joy, forgiveness, grace and truth.

Provide financially, not so he/she will relax and trust in money, but so that praise can be raised to You for being a good provider. Provide relational health, not so he/she can find security in relationships, but so that worship can spring forth to You as the healer and provider of all good relationships. Provide spiritually, not so he/she can boast in piety, but revel in Your sufficiency to fill a soul.

We love You.

We need You.

We exist joyfully for You.

In 2012, be nearer than our breath.

Amen.

I often perceive every. single. person. on. this. earth. as more important than me. Now this is good when I’m hoping to be Jesusy and kind and considering others better than myself. But it’s not good when I shrink back from being all that God created me to be.

I don’t see Jesus walking this earth with a cloud of inferiority hovering over him. He didn’t shrink back. He was comfortable in His own skin, happy to be Himself, self aware to the Nth degree. He was confident of God the Father’s affection of Him. And because He possessed this confidence, He joyfully took a towel and washed others’ feet.

So servanthood and confidence can hold hands.

Why do I struggle with this beast? I suppose it goes back to my past. Still, I can’t stay back there, can I? And neither can you. Whatever hangs over your head and makes you feel inferior is something in the past now. It’s not the great today. It doesn’t need to define you in this moment.

In this blessed moment, you are wildly loved by your Creator. He sent Jesus to die for you. He created you in your mother’s womb. He delights in you right now, even if you’re harboring bad thoughts, even if you struggle with sin, even if you’re not perfect, even when others seem to succeed in chasing their dreams and you don’t. None of that matters. What matters is your worth, which is bestowed on you by Jesus.

The inferiority beast is only as big and menacing as you allow it to be. The more you give into it, the more it grows. The more you listen to those awful voices telling you you’re nothing, the louder the voices get and the more you believe them.

Stop feeding that beast. Train your mind to believe the truth. And be set free from inferiority right now.

Now, to truly live that and take my own medicine!

Lilacs that symbolize abundance and fresh, spring life.

But I wanted to do something a little more. So I turned to Canvas People, my go-to folks for really cool canvas prints. They’re still offering an 8×10 for free, so I uploaded the lilacs pic, and will soon have the picture to put on my wall near my desk to remind me of the abundance God wants to remind me of. (And, yes, it truly is free, though you do have to pay shipping.)

I’ll let you know when I receive it. In the meantime, if you have a picture for the year and want to canvas-ize it. Here’s a click-through coupon so you can get it free:

Happy #Pic4year to you!

Mind if I pray for you?

Jesus, I pray You would give each and every one of my readers a picture of encouragement for 2012. Settle it into their minds, their hearts, and their souls. Would You be so dear and create new things in the lives of my readers? Make rivers in the desert, roadways through the wilderness, springs in the drought. You are the refresher of our souls. Please, refresh even today. Amen.

With joy,

Mary

Here’s a quote. Feel free to snag this, pin it, or print it for your own use.

We’re starting off the new year with Ashley’s story of healing and their story of reconciliation after she discovered George’s addiction to porn. It’s a hard story, but a good one. I pray it encourages you to work through your insecurities, to cling to Jesus, and trust Him to do great things in your relationships.

…

Ashley writes . . .

Glory to God! December 27th marked 5 years since I first found out about George’s porn addiction. What a rollercoaster. For those of you on different stages of this journey, I thought I’d give you a recap of our personal journey through the mess into the beauty that we thought would never come.

December 27th, 2006 – I discovered George’s porn addiction and our marriage dissolved almost completely.

January 1st, 2007 – I forgave him (so I thought at the time) only to discover more lies that he hadn’t revealed.

January – March 2007 – We tried Christian counseling and every one of them gave us advice that nearly ruined our marriage even more. “There are just some things your wife doesn’t need to know.” …. “Ashley, you just have Daddy issues from when you were younger, you need to heal from these without blaming George.” …. “Why does it bother you so much that he thinks other women are more beautiful than you?”

April – August 2007 – Time of intense, intense, intense insecurities post-pregnancy and summer when the women dress with less clothing than other seasons.

August – December 2007 – More difficult times. Roller coaster days. Some days were okay, others were the worst days imaginable. I couldn’t, no matter how hard I tried, get over my insecurities and trust him again. He was changing, slowly. No more porn, but he had some other issues we needed to work through that no one really helped us understand.

January – April 2008 – We continued ups and downs, ups and downs. I started writing Exposed and learned about what porn stars go through, which brought me to realize that it’s not just about me. That I was being selfish by only caring about how porn affected myself. This helped a lot, but also made me more insecure. I had started to heal a little bit from insecurities, and through looking into this stuff all the time, I relapsed and starting dressing immodestly myself, trying to get attention and please the eyes of lust, instead of the eyes of Love. This was a time of testing for me, and I failed. During this time, I started to get angry at George again and even started seriously considering cheating on him.

April – August 2008 – My second child was born and I went into a deeper stage of insecurity, struggling majorly with whether to try to please the eyes of my husband’s lust, or the eyes of Love and hope that my husband would find me beautiful the way God does. George also went through more and more healing, still no porn relapse, but he still had issues looking at women in public in an impure way. Our marriage bed was still tainted too.

September – December 2008 – I started praying more, reading more, trying to sort through my own issues. While at the same time George started to dive deeper into Church and love for God. Slowly, we were growing and it wasn’t always easy. Involved a lot of sacrifice. Our hearts were deeply anchored into the world, around this time they started to get pulled out.

January – June 2009 - I finished Exposed and felt like I turned over a new leaf, while I also saw George changing in the way he viewed women. It felt like we were finally free from the chains of lust, now we just needed to overcome the chains of my insecurity.

June – December 2009 – I started More than Desire and it really, really, really aided in my own healing. I shared my journey and tried to encourage others. A lot of old posts are no longer on there, but I am working on compiling them into a book. I have changed so much from the very first posts that I wrote (hopeless and bitter) that I want to edit them to still reveal how I felt, but add more of the hope I discovered along the years.

January – April 2010 – I had major battles with my insecurities. I feel like this was the final push. It was time to either give in or let go completely. This was the time I let go completely, but still had to heal from the effects.

May – August 2010 – Struggled through the summer with insecurities again, up and down, up and down, no longer mad at George because I could see the changes in him, but I still didn’t trust him fully, and I didn’t trust in God and the beauty that He decided was right for me and my purpose in this life.

September – December 2010 – Completely freed from insecurities during this time. I learned what it means to be humble. Suddenly I realized that I didn’t need to trust George to be faithful to me in order to have joy. I found my joy in Christ alone. This was the biggest turning point in my life.

January – April 2010 – We had already published Resurrection, the workbook, by this point, and then in April I published Beyond the Mirror, highlighting my journey out of insecurities. This book is truly the heart of my journey out of this mess and into the beauty of God’s love.

April  – July 2010 – I still struggled with pride issues here and there. Still had insecurities a little bit here and there, but following the steps and stages of dealing with sin I highlight in Beyond the MIrror, I was able to overcome this issues with God’s hand through the process.

July 2010 – NOW! — I can honestly say this has been the best time of my life, ever. I am more alive than I’ve ever been in my life. Completely 100% free of any insecurity about anything I’ve ever had in my life. God has humbled me in this way, and my heart, anchored to the world, has been pulled from the earth and tossed into heaven. I couldn’t describe the beauty I’ve found if I tried. It’s a love so deep for God that George could leave me for another woman and I’d still be happy. It’s the kind of love that would step out and love the woman he left me for, showering her with mercy and grace and love. It’s a love I’ve NEVER known before. It’s all so new to me. Every time I approach God in prayer I have tears in my eyes. Tears of joy and love. Tears of repentance and compassion for others too.

George and I have been through a lot over the years. All of my books highlight these times, but every journey is different. Every personal journey through this mess is designed especially for you. Especially for your marriage. It’s designed by God to help you come closer to Him. That may not mean perfect healing for your marriage. Your husband may never be perfect, he may never love you the way you want to be loved. But that’s not the purpose of this mess. The purpose of this mess is to shake up your life to bring you back to your First Love. And through that Love … you will discover a love in your marriage that doesn’t depend on the love you receive.

I know this from experience … and if I could trade places with any one of you … I would in a heartbeat. My hope is that you find complete and true healing in your precious Lord. That you find love, love, love. True love. And that your heart burns with a desire to please the eyes of Love, and never, ever the eyes of lust.

You are loved. All of you. Don’t ever forget it, no matter how up and down, or just plain down your journey is. God desires you. Run to His embrace!

It’s been an interesting process bringing my first-written novel to print. Through it all, I’m even more grateful for my traditional publishers who shepherded me through the process. To be honest, publishing your own book can be daunting and sometimes stressful. Here are 5 important things to know when you bring your work of genius to the printed page.

1. It is never a waste of time to work on your craft. Because I’ve been writing so long and worked often on improving my writing, it wasn’t a daunting process to rewrite, then edit this book. This is obviously the hardest part of the process. If you feel like you’re lacking in skills, take a class, go to a conference, join a critique group, or find a mentor.
2. Familiarize yourself with the process. I wrote a long post about uploading your book to CreateSpace here. It’s not a difficult process, but it’s helpful to understand it going in.
3. Keep in mind your page length when designing your cover. I designed my spine too wide so I’ll have to re-design it to fit it correctly.
4. Editing and editors are your friends. In glee, I opened my book, leafed through, only to find a typo. Grrrr. Just goes to show you need another set of eyes.
5. Set a deadline for yourself (or several). If you want to write a book this year, then publish it, give yourself these specific deadlines: rough draft completion, second draft completion, editing completion, cover design, formatting the inside of the manuscript, uploading to CreateSpace, and the eventual date you’d like to have your print book ready for the big time. (It’s best to start with that date first, then work your way back.)

And now, some pictures. Here’s the book! You’ll notice that the spine art bleeds over onto the cover and back. Gotta fix that. I also didn’t capitalize Wife on the back cover copy. Oops.

It’s heartening to see your work. In my case, it also involved the cover and back of the book. As a closet designer, this truly blessed me!

Ack! A typo! The sky drizzled on the Meg’s shoes. No, Meg isn’t a movie star so she can be THE Meg. There’s an extra THE in there. I’m just so fallible, folks!

And finally, this is why I felt it time to bring this novel to print. To honor the memory of my great grandmother, Mary Walker. The book’s dedicated to her.

So what’s holding you back from creating, then holding your book? To get started, click the link below. And find joy in the process and the holding.

Twenty-one years ago during what weather forecasters declared “The Arctic Express,” Patrick and I were married in the Seattle area. Not many of our guests could come because the hilly roads became an ice skating ring. Our sound system didn’t arrive, so we danced to a boom box (very quiet and pretty awkward). Our first night’s bed and breakfast got cancelled the night before, so Patrick had to scramble to find a hotel. And in that hotel in the wee hours of December waning, an earthquake tripped the alarm, sending us and other guests into the hallway.

So we started with mishap, but we’ve endured with joy.

Ups and downs. Joy and tears. Three amazing children. Ten moves (including big ones from Seattle to Texas and Texas to France and back again).

I’m terribly thankful for a husband who loves Jesus, adores me, and fathers his children brilliantly. I wouldn’t be who I am today without his constant, steady cheerleading, his encouragement for me to grow, and, yes, even our conflicts. All that mixed together has blessed me in ways I can’t quantify.

Patrick, I love you. I need you. I enjoy spending time with you. Still.

Let’s keep walking this path together.

I’m reintroducing my audio healing retreat now as a catalyst for new growth in 2012. It mimics my own journey the past two years from being tethered unhealthily to “way back when” to learning to live with joy in the moment and anticipation of the future. I first gave this series of talks to our Life Group (Sunday School class at Lakepointe Church), and the response was heartening. Since then, I’ve given several of these messages around the country at retreats. It’s my prayer that these messages truly help you heal, stretch and grow in dynamic, surprising ways.

Please note these are not actual CDs but MP3 files you download and listen to however you’d like.

Get the entire Healing Retreat here for a discounted price of $35.00.

Mary shares her healing journey, a hard won trek alongside Jesus. She shares her story accompanied by teaching and biblical truth. All six messages point to Jesus as the healer, ask life-changing questions, and offer hope for the future. Scroll down for a description of each talk.

Purchase all 6 downloads for $35.00 here:

Healing Talk 1: Mary’s Testimony. Cost $10.00.

Mary shares the story of Thin Places, sharing how God rescued her from emotional pain. She shares about the walls she put up around her heart and how God dared to tear them down. In this candid, raw talk, she gives hope that you can rise above the past and live the life you dream of.

Purchase the $10.00 download here:

Healing Talk 2: Do You Want to Get well? Cost $10.00.

Though we say we want to be well, the truth is, we are afraid. Living in pain becomes comfortable for us so we stay in the pain instead of dare to step into healing. Mary asks the same question Jesus asks the lame man: Do you want to get well? She offers practical help to move forward beyond the past.

Purchase the $10.00 download here:

Healing Talk 3: Tell the Truth about Your Past. Cost $10.00.

No one heals in unreality. You can’t heal in darkness. The way to healing is telling the truth about the past (even if the past was last week.) Mary shares about the importance of truth-telling in the healing journey and helps you understand the need to be honest. Keeping secrets is like trying to push a beach ball under water. You can do it for a time, but it inevitably pops us. No matter how much we try to suppress the pain, it usually pops up in our behavior. Telling the truth will help you finally heal from the inside out.

Purchase the $10.00 download here:

Healing Talk 4: The Feast of Forgiveness. Cost $10.00.

Forgiveness is a radical but important step toward healing, but it is not easy. It does not excuse bad behavior. It recognizes and identifies it, then offers grace and forgiveness. It does not guarantee reconciliation, but it does invite it. When we forgive, we are most like Jesus. Mary offers her own stories of forgiveness and gives practical help to those who want to be set free from bitterness.

Purchase the $10.00 download here:

Healing Talk 5: The Dangers of Hidden Vows.Cost $10.00

When we live constantly in reaction to the past, we sabotage our future. Mary defines what a hidden vow is and how it can be destructive. She shares about the importance of letting Jesus heal from the inside out, to live in His strength when we are weak. The Christian life is not about us being strong and trying hard to overcome; it’s about entrusting ourselves to our strong God.

Purchase the $10.00 download here:

Healing Talk 6: The Promised Land Principle. Cost $10.00.

Mary unpacks the story of the promised land and what we can glean about the healing journey through it. It’s important to remember that the promised land always lies just beyond a wilderness experience. Learn to learn from the past in order to live joyfully today with the future in mind.

Purchase the $10.00 download here: