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	<title>Mass Distortion</title>
	
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	<description>dezvirginarea unei minti plictisite</description>
	<pubDate>Sun, 28 Jun 2009 15:49:56 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>Because I Love You</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/28-06-2009/care-este/because-i-love-you/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/28-06-2009/care-este/because-i-love-you/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 28 Jun 2009 15:48:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Care este]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[audio death]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[death]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[nihil fist]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[you]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=282</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Goodbye.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><center><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/d6_BvVTEcCw&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;rel=0&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/d6_BvVTEcCw&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;rel=0&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></center></p>
<p>Goodbye.</p>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>There is no place for you to rest</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/11-05-2009/care-este/there-is-no-place-for-you-to-rest/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/11-05-2009/care-este/there-is-no-place-for-you-to-rest/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 11 May 2009 11:12:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Care este]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Lvmen]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Mondo]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[no. 12]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[post-metal]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=275</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Lvmen - No. 12 (Mondo, 2006)
show_09a7a091c83c5f(448, 46);
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><b>Lvmen - No. 12</b> (Mondo, 2006)<br />
<script type="text/javascript" language="javascript" src="http://embed.trilulilu.ro/audio/HellSpawn/09a7a091c83c5f"></script><script type="text/javascript" language="javascript">show_09a7a091c83c5f(448, 46);</script></p>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/04-05-2009/care-este/now-i-am-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/04-05-2009/care-este/now-i-am-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 04 May 2009 19:42:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Care este]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Club Moral]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[death]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Oppneheimer]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Robert]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=268</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[We knew the world would not be the same. A few people laughed, a few people cried, most people were silent. I remembered the line from the Hindu scripture, the Bhagavad-Gita. Vishnu is trying to persuade the Prince that he should do his duty and to impress him takes on his multi-armed form and says, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><i>We knew the world would not be the same. A few people laughed, a few people cried, most people were silent. I remembered the line from the Hindu scripture, the Bhagavad-Gita. Vishnu is trying to persuade the Prince that he should do his duty and to impress him takes on his multi-armed form and says, &#8220;Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.&#8221; I suppose we all thought that, one way or another.</i><br />
- Robert Oppenheimer</p>
<p><center><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/pM4-N0O_XRc&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/pM4-N0O_XRc&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br />
<br />
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Experienta audio-senzoriala</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/04-05-2009/care-este/experienta-audio-senzoriala/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/04-05-2009/care-este/experienta-audio-senzoriala/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 04 May 2009 18:53:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Care este]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[alb]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[audio]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[death]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[industrial]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[moarte]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[muzica]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[negru]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[noise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=263</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Deschizi ochii, dar imaginea nu ti se fixeaza. Albul iti arde retina, si-ti patrunde incet, incet toti neuronii. Inchizi ochii, si ii strangi puternic; data viitoare cand o sa ii deschizi o sa te trezesti. Ii deschizi. Te-ai trezit. Dar nu esti in pat. Urechile te dor, timpanele parca vor sa se razbune pe tine, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Deschizi ochii, dar imaginea nu ti se fixeaza. Albul iti arde retina, si-ti patrunde incet, incet toti neuronii. Inchizi ochii, si ii strangi puternic; data viitoare cand o sa ii deschizi o sa te trezesti. Ii deschizi. Te-ai trezit. Dar nu esti in pat. Urechile te dor, timpanele parca vor sa se razbune pe tine, dar pentru ce, nici tu nu stii. Prin uruitul timpanelor incepi sa-ti auzi bataile inimii. Ti-e frica, se pare, pentru ca bate puternic. Te ridici in picioare si&#8230; unde dracu-ti sunt hainele, <i>si ce e cicatricea asta pe piciorul meu</i>? Mai strangi odata din ochi, si imaginea devine mai clara. Esti inconjurat de pereti uscati si gri, crapati si sterili. Pe jos, ciment rece, acoperit de praf. Deasupra, tavanul inalt al coridorului in care te afli, acoperit de neoane reci, chirurgicale. Inima iti bate si mai puternic, atat de puternic incat acopera cu totul uruitul timpanelor. Ce-i cosmarul asta, si de ce nu te trezesti? Si de ce transpiri daca pe gura scoti aburi?</p>
<p>Te hotarasti ca e un vis&#8230; un cosmar&#8230; si ca nu se poate intampla nimic, asa ca te calmezi. Te uiti in jur si observ pe peretele din stanga ta urme de palme. De la distanta par feminine&#8230; degete subtiri, fine si lungi dar&#8230; de ce doar patru degete? Neonul de la capatul culoarului incepe sa flicare. Bazaitul pe care-l face te sperie, pare nenatural, pare a nu-si avea locul. Ah, ti s-au calmat timpanele. Bun.</p>
<p>N-are sens sa mai stai aici. Sunt doar atatea lucruri pe care le poti face inconjurat fiind de trei pereti. Decizi sa inaintezi pe culoar, dar ti-e frica de neonul din capat. Te uiti atent spre capat, incercand sa te convingi ca e o frica stupida. Te hotarasti. Dar nici nu apuci sa duci la capat primul pas cand inima ti se opreste si un fior iti trece pe spinare. Sunt urme in praf. Ale tale sigur nu sunt, pentru ca se indeparteaza de tine. Nici macar n-ar putea fi ale tale, pentru ca tu nu porti bocanci. Iti ridici privirea si pentru o secunda o umbra isi face aparitia pe peretele din capat. Ai vrea sa te trezesti, dar nu poti. Decizi sa te misti, frigul te impinge de la spate.</p>
<p>Pasesti incet catre capat. Ti-ai invins frica, esti sub neon. Culoarul continua in dreapta, iluminat fiind doar in capat de un neon. Sub lumina lui sterila, o usa. Albastru mat. Ai vrea sa scrie &#8220;Exit&#8221; pe ea, sa fie iesirea din cosmar, dar cineva isi bate joc de tine. &#8220;Entrace - Area 4&#8243;. Pornesti spre usa, si observi cu coada ochiul ceva zgariat pe peretele din dreapta ta. <b>110&#215;1101111</b>. N-ai idee ce inseamna, iti continui drumul.</p>
<p>Ai ajuns in fata usii. Simti mai mult frica, decat usurare. Ti-ar fi placut &#8220;Exit&#8221;, nu &#8220;Entrance&#8221;. Iti faci curaj, apesi manerul, impingi usa, inchizi ochii, si faci pasul. Deschizi ochii. Esti in parc. O zi frumoasa, de primavara ai zice, natura verde, pasari ciripind, idilic. Din departare insa, vine intunericul. Orizontul negru invaluie cerul. In cateva secunde parcul s-a transformat. Carari acoperite de iarba. Pomi morti, cazuti pe alei. Te intorci, parca preferi sterilitatea culoarului, insa usa nu mai e. In schimb, in spatele tau, infipta in pamant, o antena. Avea bunicul tau una, prindea bulgarii cu ea. In spate se aude vantul. Un sunet atat de natural, si totusi atat de necunoscut. Iti intorci privirea, si peisajul nu e. Esti pe un plan pustiu. Totul e alb, si de data asta nu e o camera. Nu exista pereti. Doar un bec deasupra ta, si cablu de care se balangane. Il urmaresti, cautand tavanul, dar atat cat vezi cu ochii, tavanul nu exista.</p>
<p>S-a intors frigul. Te ghemuiesti, parca astepti sa te nasti. Inchizi ochii, si-i strangi cu putere. De data asta sigur te trezesti. Ii deschizi. Esti pe o targa, intr-o camera de spital, cu scanduri batute la geamuri, avand ca sursa de lumina o voieza intr-un colt al camerei. De tavan atarna in lanturi, infipte in carlige, maini taiate de la umar. Insa ceva e ciudat&#8230; nici una dintre maini nu are mai mult de 4 degete. Inchizi din nou ochii, strangi puternic, si-i deschizi. De data asta, nimic. Pare a fi lumina, insa in toate directiile, nimic. Totul e negru.</p>
<p>Inchizi din nou ochii, strangi puternic&#8230; <i>de data asta sigur ma trezesc</i>. Si-apoi, nimic.</p>
<p>Asa as explica eu, urmatoarele experiente audio:<br />
<b>Atrium Carceri - A New Silence</b><br />
<script type="text/javascript" language="javascript" src="http://embed.trilulilu.ro/audio/HellSpawn/11ba0570e4e332"></script><script type="text/javascript" language="javascript">show_11ba0570e4e332(448, 46);</script><br />
<b>Nazi U.F.O. Commander - The Coming Race (Vril Chant)</b><br />
<script type="text/javascript" language="javascript" src="http://embed.trilulilu.ro/audio/HellSpawn/fdc832d398d93c"></script><script type="text/javascript" language="javascript">show_fdc832d398d93c(448, 46);</script><br />
<b>Alan Lamb - Night Passage</b><br />
<script type="text/javascript" language="javascript" src="http://embed.trilulilu.ro/audio/HellSpawn/9466d325d2da9c"></script><script type="text/javascript" language="javascript">show_9466d325d2da9c(448, 46);</script></p>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Soundtrack perfect</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/13-04-2009/general/soundtrack-perfect/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/13-04-2009/general/soundtrack-perfect/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 13 Apr 2009 08:47:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[General]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[industrial]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[martial]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[razboi]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Triarii]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[war]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=258</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[In caz de razboi, rog atacatorii sa vina cu tancuri din care sa rasune urmatoarea melodie. Multumesc.
Multumesc si lui Vic ca m-a scapat de lungi cautari.

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In caz de razboi, rog atacatorii sa vina cu tancuri din care sa rasune urmatoarea melodie. Multumesc.</p>
<p>Multumesc si lui Vic ca m-a scapat de lungi cautari.</p>
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		<item>
		<title>Ai uitat, este?</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/12-04-2009/general/ai-uitat-este/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/12-04-2009/general/ai-uitat-este/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 12 Apr 2009 20:17:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[General]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[AB4]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[atomic]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[marfa]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[muzica]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=256</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Au trecut opt ani, daca nu mai mult, de cand piesa asta rula la AtomicTV. Uitasem ca imi place AB4. A se observa influentele Nirvana in melodia asta.

[edit]
Nu doar melodia ci si clipul este super.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Au trecut opt ani, daca nu mai mult, de cand piesa asta rula la AtomicTV. Uitasem ca imi place AB4. A se observa influentele Nirvana in melodia asta.</p>
<p><center><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/kCz6cBYDAwA&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;rel=0&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/kCz6cBYDAwA&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;rel=0&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></center></p>
<p><b>[edit]</b><br />
Nu doar melodia ci si clipul este super.</p>
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		<item>
		<title>78 de minute in alb si negru</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/12-04-2009/general/78-de-minute-in-alb-si-negru/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/12-04-2009/general/78-de-minute-in-alb-si-negru/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 12 Apr 2009 16:51:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[General]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[alb-negru]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Begotten]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[experimental]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[genial]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[horror]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=251</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Begotten este, fara nici un fel de dubiu, cel mai ciudat film pe care l-am vazut vreodata. Pentru mine, cele 78 de minute ale filmului sunt ca o incursiune intr-unul din cosmarurile lui Pinhead.
Mi-e lene sa scriu foarte mult (as scrie, filmul e genial) pentru ca ma dor ochii, asa ca o sa spun niste [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Begotten este, fara nici un fel de dubiu, cel mai ciudat film pe care l-am vazut vreodata. Pentru mine, cele 78 de minute ale filmului sunt ca o incursiune intr-unul din cosmarurile lui <a href="http://massdistortion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/pinhead4.jpg" title="Pinhead" rel="lightbox[251]">Pinhead</a>.</p>
<p>Mi-e lene sa scriu foarte mult (as scrie, filmul e genial) pentru ca ma dor ochii, asa ca o sa spun niste generalitati despre film si apoi o sa bag niste citate de pe net.</p>
<p>Begotten e un film horror experimental lansat in 1990, filmat in totalitate pe film alb-negru. Dupa ce a fost filmat, intreg filmul a fost procesat in asa fel incat singurele culori din film sunt alb si negru, fara semitonuri. Pentru fiecare secunda din film au fost necesare zece ore de munca pe film. Nu exista nici un fel de dialog in film, nici macar &#8220;sunet ambiental&#8221;. Toate sunetele din film sunt din post-productie. Coloana sonora este geniala.</p>
<p>De pe IMDB:</p>
<blockquote><p>God disembowels himself with a straight razor. The spirit-like Mother Earth emerges, venturing into a bleak, barren landscape. Twitching and cowering, the Son Of Earth is set upon by faceless cannibalss.</p></blockquote>
<p>De pe Wikipedia:</p>
<blockquote><p>The film opens with a robed, profusely bleeding &#8220;God&#8221; disemboweling himself, with the act ultimately ending in his death. A woman emerges from his remains, arouses the body, and impregnates herself with his ejaculate. Becoming pregnant, she wanders off into a vast and barren landscape. The pregnancy manifests in a fully grown man whom she leaves to his own devices.</p>
<p>The &#8220;Son of Earth&#8221; meets a group of faceless nomads who seize him with what is either a very long umbilical cord or a rope. The Son of Earth vomits organic pieces, and the nomads excitedly accept these as gifts. The nomads finally bring the man to a fire and burn him.</p>
<p>&#8220;Mother Earth&#8221; encounters the resurrected man and comforts him. She seizes the man with a similar umbilical cord. The nomads appear and proceed to rape her. Son of Earth is left to mourn over the lifeless body. A group of characters appears, carry her off and dismember her, later returning for Son of Earth. After he, too, is dismembered, the group buries the remains, planting the parts into the crust of the earth. The burial site becomes lush with flowers.</p></blockquote>
<p>Si o mostra din film:<br />
<center><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/z_c_odzPOZc&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;rel=0&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/z_c_odzPOZc&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;rel=0&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></center></p>
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		<title>Demoralizatorul maxim</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/09-04-2009/care-este/demoralizatorul-maxim/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/09-04-2009/care-este/demoralizatorul-maxim/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:40:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Care este]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[#pman]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[demoralizare]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[moldova]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[revolutie]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=230</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Ma uit pe #pman la &#8220;stenografia revolutiei&#8221; din Republica Moldova si cand mai apare cate un romanas de-al nostru mai mai ca imi vine sa imi dau cu tastatura in freza.
Deci hai sa consideram situatia&#8230; Tu esti moldovean, stai cu telefonu&#8217; in mana la PMAN (Piata Marii Adunari Nationale) si te uiti pe twitter se [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Ma uit pe <a href="http://search.twitter.com/search?q=%23pman">#pman</a> la &#8220;stenografia revolutiei&#8221; din Republica Moldova si cand mai apare cate un romanas de-al nostru mai mai ca imi vine sa imi dau cu tastatura in freza.</p>
<p>Deci hai sa consideram situatia&#8230; Tu esti moldovean, stai cu telefonu&#8217; in mana la PMAN (Piata Marii Adunari Nationale) si te uiti pe twitter se vezi ce mai zice lumea, cum se mai organizeaza treburile, curent nu mai ai, acoperire GSM nu mai ai, internet mai ai doar pe telefon si apare de nicaieri un idiot de roman care zice ca &#8220;ASTAZI IN BUCURESTI mArE aDuNarE in piata univerSITATIIlor pentru sustinerea moldovenilor. NE VOM RUGA PENTRU VOI!!!!11&#8243;.</p>
<p>Din start, te-a terminat psihic faptul ca se aduna mai multi romani in piata universitatii sa sustina &#8220;revolutia&#8221; din Chisinau decat moldoveni la PMNA.</p>
<p>Apoi dupa ce ti-ai dat seama ca <i>astazi parca suntem mai putini ca ieri</i>, te mai uiti in stanga si mai vezi ca trei politisti il calca in picioare pe unu&#8217;, te uiti in dreapta si vezi trei pusti aruncati intr-o duba, si cand te uiti in fata vezi un zid mare de politisti in uniforma de crapat capete.</p>
<p>Te uiti inapoi pe <a href="http://search.twitter.com/search?q=%23pman">#pman</a> si il vezi pe unu ca zice de trei avioane cu militari rusi care au aterizat pe aeroport. Acum deja iti cade cerul incap si te gandesti cum dracu&#8217; sa faci sa ajungi in Norvegia mai repede.</p>
<p>Si apoi te intorci la idiotii aia din Piata Universitatii. Si mai citesti odata mesajul si vezi la capat&#8230; <i>NE VOM RUGA PENTRU VOI!!!11&#8243;</i>. Te mai uiti odata in jur&#8230; te gandesti din ce parte o sa vina un gabor sa iti futa un baston dupa ceafa si 13 picioare in coaste&#8230; te mai uiti odata in telefon&#8230; si cred ca te doare fix in pula de rugaciunile unor romanasi aflati la sute de kilometri distanta, ca daca se pun politistii cu bastoanele pe tine sau rusii cu mitralierele, nu te mai salveaza nici Allah, nici Buddha, nici Zeus, nici Ra, nici FSM, si nici Dumnezeu.</p>
<p>Nasol ce se intampla la Chisinau, dar momentan eu nu cred ca moldovenii au vreo sansa. Sunt total dezorganizati, nu au nici un fel de lider&#8230; si cand comunistii stau in fata ta cu bastoane si mitraliere nu cred ca rezolvi nimic prin <i>proteste pasnice</i>.</p>
<p><b>[update]</b><br />
Apropo: <a href=http://87.248.162.116:8000/">Radio Vocea Basarabiei</a>, cat o mai merge.</p>
<p><b>[update2]</b><br />
AHAHA HA HA HAH HAHHA H HAhahahha hah a *inhales* ahAHiuhaahhaia hahahahahahaha hashahhah hahaaaa<br />
<center><a href="http://massdistortion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/ahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahaha.png" rel="lightbox[230]"><img src="http://massdistortion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/ahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahaha.png" alt="ahahah ahahahhahahahah ahahahhahahaha" title="ahahah ahahahhahahahah ahahahhahahaha" width="500" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-235" /></a></center></p>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Be afraid</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/06-04-2009/comice/be-afraid/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/06-04-2009/comice/be-afraid/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 06 Apr 2009 18:49:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Comice]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[evil]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[idiot]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[muti]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[pute]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[status]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[surzi]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=223</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Diana: mama urasc oamenii care isi pun status cu nu vorbiti cu mine
Diana: da&#8217; du-te draq si iesi de pe mess idiotu lumii
HellSpawn: e status d-ala de om care vrea de fapt sa fie bagat in seama, sa impresioneze
Diana: aoleu.. dar p&#8217;astia i-as lasa muti si surzi, numai asa sa nu mai vorbeasca cu nimeni [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><b>Diana</b>: mama urasc oamenii care isi pun status cu nu vorbiti cu mine<br />
<b>Diana</b>: da&#8217; du-te draq si iesi de pe mess idiotu lumii<br />
<u><b>HellSpawn</b></u>: e status d-ala de om care vrea de fapt sa fie bagat in seama, sa impresioneze<br />
<b>Diana</b>: aoleu.. dar p&#8217;astia i-as lasa muti si surzi, numai asa sa nu mai vorbeasca cu nimeni ca prea se plang, si le tai si mainile sa n-aiba cu ce scrie sau sa gesticuleze<br />
<b>Diana</b>: *n-aiba<br />
<u><b>HellSpawn</b></u>: sau putzele<br />
<b>Diana</b>: si alea<br />
<u><b>HellSpawn</b></u>: :))<br />
<b>Diana</b>: i-as lasa asa numai cu trunchiu si capu<br />
<b>Diana</b>: fara nimic atarnator</p>
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		<item>
		<title>Lovecraft isi da palme</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/02-04-2009/general/lovecraft-isi-da-palme/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/02-04-2009/general/lovecraft-isi-da-palme/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Apr 2009 18:04:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[General]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[cthulhu]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[film]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[lovecraft]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[varza]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=219</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Incerc chiar in aceste momente sa duc la capat vizionarea filmului Cthulhu. Ma gandeam ca o sa fie ceva mai ca in poveste&#8230; dar nu e.
Personajul principal e emo (pe bune, si-a taiat venele), si deci gay. Si gay tot pe bune este, facea concursuri de masturbare cu prietenul lui.
Pe la minutul 57 apar niste [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Incerc chiar in aceste momente sa duc la capat vizionarea filmului Cthulhu. Ma gandeam ca o sa fie ceva mai ca in poveste&#8230; dar nu e.<br />
Personajul principal e emo (pe bune, si-a taiat venele), si deci gay. Si gay tot pe bune este, facea concursuri de masturbare cu prietenul lui.<br />
Pe la minutul 57 apar niste creaturi care iar nu au legatura cu nimic din ce a scris Lovecraft.<br />
Minutul 62, gay sex. O sa rasfoiesc PDF-ul dar nu cred ca scria despre asa ceva.<br />
Minutul 65, il gasesc pe un pusti mort, legat de balustrada unei terase. Misto, dar pe langa.<br />
La minutul 74 se gaseste o scena care e chiar&#8230; prea marfa, sincer. Da&#8217; tot pe langa poveste e.<br />
Minutul 82: tac-su&#8217; a omorat-o pe ma-sa; tac-su&#8217; era prieten bun cu Cthulhu. Mdeah.<br />
Il omoara in bataie pe unul la minutul 84. I like this.<br />
Minutul 84 secunda 49: apare o femeie goala in film. Dispare la 84:50.<br />
La minutul 90 ii arata copiii. Dar noua nu ni-i arata, ne arata decat apa roz din cada.<br />
Dupa o ora si 32 de minute ii arata pe unii cum ies din mare. Cool shit. Si aici se termina filmul.</p>
<p>In afara de capacul de canal pe care este &#8220;desenat&#8221; <a href="http://www.3x6.net/vhoorl/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/cthulhu-wallprint.jpg" rel="lightbox[219]">blazonul</a> lui Cthulhu si de <i>idolul</i> negru pe care-l tot plimba aia mai nimic din filmul asta nu are legatura cu ce a scris Lovecraft. Saracul om cred ca se intoarce in mormant si isi da palme in viata de apoi cand vede ce au facut astia.</p>
<p><center><a href="http://massdistortion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/mv5bmtq4ntmzmdkymv5bml5banbnxkftztcwodexnzi5mq_v1_sx276_sy400_.jpg" rel="lightbox[219]"><img src="http://massdistortion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/mv5bmtq4ntmzmdkymv5bml5banbnxkftztcwodexnzi5mq_v1_sx276_sy400_.jpg" alt="Cthulhu" title="Cthulhu" width="276" height="400" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-220" /></a></center></p>
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		<item>
		<title>Chiftele</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/28-03-2009/comice/chiftele/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/28-03-2009/comice/chiftele/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 27 Mar 2009 23:35:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Comice]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[chiftele]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=216</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Cred ca am gasit raspunsul unor probleme care ne deranjeaza pe toti. Raspunsul este &#8220;chiftele&#8221;.
Uite niste exemple.
Q: Ce facem cu maidanezii?
A: Chiftele.
Simplu, scurt, si cat se poate de la obiect. Chiftele sa fie. Si cu chiftelele de la maidanezi putem sa hranim oamenii pe timp de criza (adica in prezent).
Q: Daca nu exista zeitati, atunci [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Cred ca am gasit raspunsul unor probleme care ne deranjeaza pe toti. Raspunsul este <i>&#8220;chiftele&#8221;</i>.</p>
<p>Uite niste exemple.</p>
<p>Q: Ce facem cu maidanezii?<br />
A: Chiftele.</p>
<p>Simplu, scurt, si cat se poate de la obiect. Chiftele sa fie. Si cu chiftelele de la maidanezi putem sa hranim oamenii pe timp de criza (adica in prezent).</p>
<p>Q: Daca nu exista zeitati, atunci ce a existat inaintea universului nostru?<br />
A: Chiftele.</p>
<p>Q: Daca desfac LCD-ul de plictiseala, ce-o sa gasesc in el?<br />
A: Chiftele.</p>
<p>Q: Exista vreun lucru care iti poate strica tot cheful mai rau decat un prezervativ?<br />
A: Chiftelele.</p>
<p>Pe bune. Incercati voi sa va ganditi la chiftele cand faceti sex si vedeti ce se intampla. Sau incercati sa va puneti un prezervativ inainte sa faceti sex si vedeti cat chef mai aveti dupa (hint catre producatori: schimbati ambalajele ca de 20 de ani de cand ma stiu eu n-am vazut alt tip de ambalaj, si sunt extrem de enervante).</p>
<p>Q: Mi-e foame, ce sa mananc?<br />
A: Chiftele.</p>
<p>Q: Porcul meu de guinea a incercat sa ma omoare in somn. Ce fac?<br />
A: Chiftele.</p>
<p>Q: Vin teroristii sa ne omoare, ce facem?<br />
A: Chiftele.</p>
<p>Q: Despre ce sa scriu in proiectul de la Comportamentul Consumatorilor?<br />
A: Chiftele.</p>
<p>Q: Care este raspunsul acestei intrebari?<br />
A: Chiftele.</p>
<p>Tineti minte filmul <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0371724/" title="A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy">A Hitchhiker&#8217;s Guide to the Galaxy</a>? Faza aia cu &#8220;42&#8243;, raspunsul intrebarii intrebarilor? Scenaristul e un bou. Chiftelele sunt raspunsul suprem.</p>
<p><center><div id="attachment_217" class="wp-caption alignnone" style="width: 360px"><a href="http://massdistortion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/ikea_chiftele.jpg" rel="lightbox[216]"><img src="http://massdistortion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/ikea_chiftele.jpg" alt="You are now hungry." title="Chiftele IKEA" width="350" height="263" class="size-full wp-image-217" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">You are now hungry.</p></div></center></p>
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		<title>Cantec de dragoste pentru aglomeratia din Bucuresti</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/04-03-2009/general/cantec-de-dragoste-pentru-aglomeratia-din-bucuresti/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/04-03-2009/general/cantec-de-dragoste-pentru-aglomeratia-din-bucuresti/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 04 Mar 2009 19:55:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[General]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[aglomeratie]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[bucureti]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[korn]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=210</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><center><object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/gS5ZOJyN8B4&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;rel=0&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/gS5ZOJyN8B4&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1&#038;rel=0&#038;color1=0x3a3a3a&#038;color2=0x999999" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></center></p>
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		<item>
		<title>Completare</title>
		<link>http://massdistortion.net/02-03-2009/general/completare/</link>
		<comments>http://massdistortion.net/02-03-2009/general/completare/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 02 Mar 2009 20:26:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>_eof</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[General]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[chart]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[fetish]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://massdistortion.net/?p=206</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Aduc o completare articolului despre sex. Am primit urmatorul grafic de la Foxana, drept dovada ca nu sunt singurul om de pe planeta cu prea mult timp liber la indemana (si cu o conexiune la internet).

Also, you need to watch more South Park (here).
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Aduc o completare articolului <a href="http://massdistortion.net/03-02-2009/care-este/sex-motherfucker-do-you-speak-it/" title="Sex motherfucker, do you speak it?">despre sex</a>. Am primit urmatorul grafic de la <a href="http://electrosocuri.nimic.org/">Foxana</a>, drept dovada ca nu sunt singurul om de pe planeta cu prea mult timp liber la indemana (si cu o conexiune la internet).</p>
<p><center><a href="http://massdistortion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/greatestchartever.gif" rel="lightbox[206]"><img src="http://massdistortion.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/greatestchartever.gif" alt="Greatest Chart Ever" title="Greatest Chart Ever" width="500" height="257" /></a></center></p>
<p>Also, you need to watch more South Park (<a href="http://www.southparkstudios.com/episodes/season/1/">here</a>).</p>
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