MCRmy Blog

So I'm gonna state the obvious...

2008-08-31T22:21:00.000-07:00

THIS BLOG IS DEADY MCDEADDEAD!!!!!!!!
With a capital D-E-A-D.

Where did everyone go? Like seriously guys, did you all develop lives or something? Lol.

Good news is that there's been 3 posts in August which is 2 more than July.
And I'm the first for September so yeah.
Btw, my birthday is September 24. Going to be 16 finally, yay!

And for people who might be in Lousiana, good luck & God bless.

Hopefully you won't need it.

xoxox, Jenn♥

P.S. Does anyone here like The Dear Hunter? I love the song The Pimp and The Priest; good stuff right there.

:DDDDDDD REVIVE THIS JOINT!

2008-08-25T11:45:00.000-07:00

:DDDDDDDD

hai guysssssssss..

Or whoever still goes on this >_<

I kind of forgot about my blogger account...sorryyy...

I start School tomorrow and I'm Uber Excited!

Cause my summer was pathetic and boring :/.

*********************************
>_> restarted. November 21st, 2008.

xD Twilight is out today.
I'm not watching it yet :]
Waiting for like 2 weeks after enough of the screaming little girls have screamed their silly heads of.
BTW. PATTINSON WAS SO MUCH BETTER AS CEDRIC DIGGORY!!!!!
>_> HARRY POTTER FTW.
:D
Yay.

This incessant raining needs to stop.

2008-08-19T15:47:00.000-07:00

Tropical storm Fay sucks.

Monday was the first day of school.

I had no school today & I have no school tomorrow.

Florida sucks...

NEVER MOVE HERE!

EDIT: I have no school for the rest of this week too. No school till Monday. >_<

Boo!

2008-08-18T04:47:00.000-07:00

Guess what happens on Wednesday?
Go on, guess!

MAX GOES TO SEE PANIC AT THE DISCO AND THE ACADEMY IS... AND COBRA STARSHIP.

^__________________________^

=[

2008-07-23T18:16:00.000-07:00

I miss this blog. D:

So, hey, guess what!

2008-06-18T00:37:00.000-07:00

I SAT MY UNIVERSITY MATHS EXAM THIS MORNING.
WHICH MEANS, AND I'D LIKE EVERYBODY'S ATTENTION, PLEASE, THAT I PRETTY MUCH NEVER HAVE TO DO HARDCORE ASSESSABLE MATHS EVER.AGAIN.

FWEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

that is all.

OH HI I DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE.

2008-06-04T06:48:00.000-07:00

So I haven't been posting a lot D:
Sorry!
I'll start again once I don't have exams and other horrible happenings.
But I doooo blog every day over at my ~LiveJournal, simply because it is easy to do so :D.

SO HOW HAVE YOU ALL BEEN?
GOOD? BAD? BOTH?
YOUR HAIR LOOKS ~GREAT TODAY, BTW. :D

So I got a blog of my own.

2008-05-29T13:46:00.000-07:00

I now have a blog too.

I am a copycat.

Linkage to blogage

If you were wondering about the URL well there's a funny story behind that.

Once a upon a time ago, before the homecoming parade my band buddies and I were chilling in a parking lot waiting for the parade to start [we were in the parade]. We were enjoying the hilarious stories of Chris [who is most definitely gay], when John [who is most definitely straight] came out of nowhere and began to feel up on him. Nobody cared cuz that is what we band kids do when we're bored. No joke.

Well after feeling Chris up, John began to do the PartyBoy dance and he's all "uh tsk uh tsk uh tsk" behind Chris's head. While this going on me and this chick Nina are all o_O cuz his male appendage was like WHOOSH back and forth giving birth to the word swinging weiner action.

It was probably one of the most disturbing things I've ever seen. Plus it happens all the time cause John likes to dance. Yes this is the same John from the pictures.

Band geeks have all the fun.

2008-05-23T20:51:00.000-07:00

So I haven't posted in forever....Oh well, what a shame.

So yesterday was graduation and cuz I'm in band I had to go. I stayed after school with my buddies and several girls brought their straighteners. Resulting in this:
John

Steve & John

Steve & John & Teddy aka Zack.

Cause all the cool kids join band and straighten guys' hair. Yepp.

Of course it was really fricking humid outside and it rained so all the guys' hair reverted right back to normal which sucked.

So next topic, I might possibly like somebody but I'm not 100% percent sure. His name is Tyler and he rides my bus and we walk home together cuz our houses are in the direction. Lucky for me this one is actually straight! [Everybody I've liked since I've entered high school was either not straight or had alot of gayboy tendencies] But unfortunately for me he's definitely taken. Oh, what a shame...

Plushies, FTW.

2008-05-14T04:16:00.000-07:00

Oh. And I've branched out in the world of blogging. Check me out here.

Big Brother: A Rant.

2008-05-07T04:24:00.000-07:00

Hi.
I haven't posted in a while and I just finished watching Big Brother, so I thought I'd rant about it.

You might like to go to www.bigbrother.com.au and read about it so you know what the hell I'm on about.

Firstly, WTF. I never watch Big Brother! I have expressed my distaste for Big Brother previously. I vomited at Gretel Kileen's face. I rolled my eyes at the turkey slapping incident.
But for some reason I decided to watch it this year.

This year, for some ungodly reason, they decided to have Corey Worthington in the house as a guest.
You probably have no idea who he is, so I will tell you.
Basically, he is a seventeen year old (lolol like me, except I'm cooler, obvi.) who threw a massive party while his parents were away, got in loads of trouble from the police, and somehow got semi-famous out of it because of all the news coverage and also because he is an asshole.
HE'S LIKE PETE WENTZ, MINUS THE GUYLINER AND MUSICAL TALENT!

So this is Corey:

1. Yes, yes he does come across as a prick, even in photographs. Hahahaha. I know.
2. I actually can't find a photo of him without his yellow sunglasses on. Which is a good thing, because he has GIGANTIC EYEBROWS OF DOOOOM!!1!1

Anyhoo, aside from the obvious reasons why it's a badbadbad idea, such as HE IS SEVENTEEN YEARS OLD WHY ARE THEY LETTING HIM INTO A HOUSE WITH PEOPLE AVERAGING TEN YEARS OLDER THAN HIM FOR THE LOVE OF JEBUS, as well as the fact that if they show him naked it's child pornography x_x and they could get in so much trouble; I also think that he is boring.

Yes, that's right: boring.

In fact, all he does is hide behind his hoodie and THOSE GOD DAMN YELLOW SUNGLASSES. That's it.

I swear, I'd be more interesting.
At least I'd try to piss people off.
And I also wouldn't have peroxide blonde hair with dark brown GIGANTIC EYEBROWS OF DOOOOOOOM!!1!1

I'M JUST SAYING THAT IF HE'S GIRLY ENOUGH TO DYE HIS HAIR AND USE A HAIR STRAIGHTENER, HE SHOULD BE ABLE TO TINT HIS EYEBROWS.

AND THEN HE GOES ON AND ON ABOUT HOW HE DOESN'T LIKE TO HURT PEOPLE.
COME ON, DUDE.
NOBODY CARES.
I SUSPECT HE IS JUST TRYING TO GET LAID.
IDFK.

Also, I hate Terri.
Terri is old and racist and hasn't yet discovered makeup. Or, y'know, facelifts.
Why they let a 50-something year old into Big Brother, I shall never know.
I like Travis, even if his voice is about ten billion octaves above mine, wtf, did you not go through puberty or something, mate?!
Bianca is the devil. We shall not speak of her.
The other ones are boring.
AS BORING AS COREY, EVEN.
But probably not.

THUS ENDS MIRI'S MASSIVE RANT.
No Miris were ~~drunk~~ in the making of this blog.

Oh, The Happiness Of Max

2008-05-05T22:12:00.000-07:00

Weeee. I haven't posted in a while and I've just had the random week to end all random weeks. I swear to blog.
It started on Monday night. Grand Theft Auto IV launched here in Australia. It was a pretty big deal, so we (EB Games) had a midnight launch. My friend Gavin, who goes to uni with me and works with me, ate with my family and then we headed to work at 10.00 pm. It was kinda eery, being the only two people wandering around the mall, waiting for security to let us in to access the store.
We got to dress up. I was a hardcore awesome pimp. Joman, Trudi, Justin and Gavin were all gangsta in big hoodies and bandannas and blinnnngggg. We looked awesome. If I can get a photo from Joman, I'll post it here.
Anywaaaays, so we looked neat and the night ran smoothly and I totally kicked everyone else's arse at making sales. Go Team Max!
So, Gavin and I grabbed our shit when we closed and were about to dice the scene, when Justin stopped us and asked for a lift. So we ended up road-tripping six million kilometres out of our way to drop him home. And then had to stop at a 24 hour McDonald's, because all the road-tripping induced a desperate need for ice-cream.
So that was Monday.

Tuesday was spent frantically doing an assignment. Wednesday was much the same, except it was spent in one of the labs at university with pretty much everyone else in the class running around arguing about databases and ER diagrams and data dictionaries. It was fun. Aside from the panicking part. We had to submit it electronically by 5pm. At 4.30pm, I'm trying to think of one final justification, and Gavin and Tom are singing Backstreet Boys. Loudly. And they had less done than me! T_T Boys.

Thursday, my friend Steph, who moved to another city for university, came up to visit! So we hit the city and ate a lot of ice-cream and bought crazy makeup and stupid shirts and it was fun. And theennnnn, another of my friends, Lolly, got her license! And she has a yellow VW beetle. It's so freaking awesome. Except she won't let me paint it like a pikachu. D:
Anywaaaays, she came and picked Steph and I up after dinner and we went back into the city and got more ice-cream.
I messaged Justin and Gavin, and Justin came to meet us. Gavin was at a movie, so we decided to go meet him. Lolly dropped us off, and we tried to get tickets. The movie had only started 10 minutes ago, but the bitches at the counter were all, "We're CLOSED." T____T
Sooo, we went BACK into the city, except we walked this time. And we sat outside another maccas for aaaaages. Then Gavin met up with us, and we ended up sitting there talking til 2.30 am. LOL. We went out for ice-cream and didn't get home til 3 in the morning.....

And Friday was spent in Lolly's bedroom playing Twister and watching/singing along with a squillion Disney movies. We made brownies. Steph and I got home and collapsed into bed.
OMFG. And theennnnnn, fucking hell, at 3 A-FUCKING-M, Gavin and his awesome mate Clint turned up drunk on my doorstep. Sigh. We put them in a cab and sent them home. And he was randomly angry at me for some reason. So I was sad, because I really like this guy.
BUT. The next day, there was mucho grovelling, so he was forgiven. Saturday was worrrrkkk all day for me, and a wedding for Steph, so it was pretty boring. Saturday night, I turned off my phone, to avoid a million 2am messages from Gavin.

Sunday morning, I turned my phone on before heading to work. And sure enough, there was a message from Gavin at 4.30am. BUT GUESS WHAT IT SAID! :D He asked me out. Weeeeeee. Except, I had to work with him all day, and I wanted to talk to him, rather than just text him back, and work is sososososososo not the place to do that.
Sunday night, Steph and I went to a barbeque with all my neighbours, it was good fun.

Monday, we studied. Steph was leaving Monday night and had an exam this morning, and I have a Maths exam tomorrow afternoon, so we were both freaking a little. Steph got picked up, I went emo. I won't see her again til August. But when I do see her, it's for the Panic at the Disco + The Academy Is... + Cobra Starship show, so.
Gavin messaged me again, freaking about maths. So he came over to study. And my mum fed him, because she worries that he doesn't eat properly. Which is a totally justified concern. He doesn't eat properly. And we blatantly did not do maths. We threw pillows at each other and he teased me about my socks and there was more grovelling about Friday night and this is the worst blog I've ever written. And then we ended up talking about the message from Sunday. And then there was cuddling. And more pillow fights. So. I'm pretty smiley right now. Even though I have a huge Maths exam tomorrow afternoon, my period and another horrid assignment due on Thursday afternoon.

^_^

longgg time nooo postie.

2008-04-28T19:51:00.000-07:00

o___O
HAI!

so i didnt have school today...not sure why.
o_O
im really tired so...yeah. i just wanted to say hi.
:]

oh and i watched a marilyn monroe movie today, it made me happy :D

oh, and the other day, debra AKA yayforsugar got me obsessed with a show called the mighty boosh. WATCH THE VIDEOS BELOW AND LOOK AT THE MIGHTY BOOSH.
o__o;
i need sleep.
GNIGHT!

Um. Oops.

2008-04-23T00:17:00.000-07:00

We have a slight situation here, people.
It appears our admin lady (ahem, that would be me) has lost the password to the admin account. And also the password for the email for the admin account.
So I can't add the new people.
Or make any changes.
Or do anything, really.
If I told any of you PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE email it to me at miriana@hiptop.com.au and I will love you forever and ever and ever.
Thanks, dears.
And I'm so so sorry!

Here is a video as a plea for forgiveness!
(Yeah, I know it's super old, and you've probably all seen it, but I still find it hilarious).

..Yeah, I probably just scarred you all for life. Sorry about that, too.
That chick deserves a medal for being able to fangirl over someone whose name she doesn't know, though.

Numbers Are Fun!

2008-04-20T04:29:00.000-07:00

Post count on the main TSN boards right now: 126.

Number of songs I have written thus far this year: 83.

Amount of cupcakes I made yesterday: 15.

Number of times I have said "WTF?!" over the engagement of AshWentzDay: 306.

How long I laughed today at the fact that my conservative Serbian grandfather was a huge Alice Cooper fan: Too long.

Number of times my mother has yelled at me over trivial things today: 928139.

Days till the Panic! At the Disco show: 4 months and 3 days. ohyes.

Hey guess what!

2008-04-16T00:39:00.003-07:00

Max loves Miri.
Fact.

Hey guess what!

2008-04-15T06:16:00.000-07:00

It's Max's birthday soon.
AND I STILL REMEMBER.
-is awesome.-

I thought I'd post a short story as well.

2008-04-15T02:15:00.000-07:00

Except I fail at everything!
So here is a short story written in the 1920s by New Zealand writer Katherine Mansfield.
She was this super rebellious friend of Virginia Woolf who had a husband and a girlfriend at the same time.
Yeah. Pwn'd.

Anyway, this is possibly the cutest thing ever, it is called:

"Sun and Moon".
(please to be ignoring the [page something] things. I can't be bothered deleting them all, rofl.)

IN the afternoon the chairs came, a whole big cart full of little gold ones with their legs in the air. And then the flowers came. When you stared down from the balcony at the people carrying them the flower pots looked like funny awfully nice hats nodding up the path.

Moon thought they were hats. She said: "Look. There's a man wearing a palm on his head." But she never knew the difference between real things and not real ones.

There was nobody to look after Sun and Moon. Nurse was helping Annie alter Mother's dress which was much-too-long-and-tight-under-the-arms and Mother was running all over the house and telephoning Father to be sure not to forget things. She only had time to say: "Out of my way, children!"

They kept out of her way–at any rate Sun did. He did so hate being sent stumping back to the nursery. It didn't matter about Moon. If she got tangled in people's legs they only threw her up and shook her till she squeaked. But Sun was too heavy for that. He was so heavy that the fat man [Page 209] who came to dinner on Sundays used to say: "Now, young man, let's try to lift you." And then he'd put his thumbs under Sun's arms and groan and try and give it up at last saying: "He's a perfect little ton of bricks!

Nearly all the furniture was taken out of the dining-room. The big piano was put in a corner and then there came a row of flower pots and then there came the goldy chairs. That was for the concert. When Sun looked in a white faced man sat at the piano–not playing, but banging at it and then looking inside. He had a bag of tools on the piano and he had stuck his hat on a statue against the wall. Sometimes he just started to play and then he jumped up again and looked inside. Sun hoped he wasn't the concert.

But of course the place to be in was the kitchen. There was a man helping in a cap like a blancmange, and their real cook, Minnie, was all red in the face and laughing. Not cross at all. She gave them each an almond finger and lifted them up on to the flour bin so that they could watch the wonderful things she and the man were making for supper. Cook brought in the things and he put them on dishes and trimmed them. Whole fishes, with their heads and eyes and tails still on, he sprinkled with red and green and yellow bits; he made squiggles all over the jellies, he stuck a collar on a ham and put a very thin sort of a fork in it; he dotted almonds and tiny round biscuits on [Page 210] the creams. And more and more things kept coming.

"Ah, but you haven't seen the ice pudding," said Cook. "Come along." Why was she being so nice, thought Sun as she gave them each a hand. And they looked into the refrigerator.

Oh! Oh! Oh! It was a little house. It was a little pink house with white snow on the roof and green windows and a brown door and stuck in the door there was a nut for a handle.

When Sun saw the nut he felt quite tired and had to lean against Cook.

"Let me touch it. Just let me put my finger on the roof," said Moon, dancing. She always wanted to touch all the food. Sun didn't.

"Now, my girl, look sharp with the table," said Cook as the housemaid came in.

"It's a picture, Min," said Nellie. "Come along and have a look." So they all went into the dining-room. Sun and Moon were almost frightened. They wouldn't go up to the table at first; they just stood at the door and made eyes at it. It wasn't real night yet but the blinds were down in the dining-room and the lights turned on–and all the lights were red roses. Red ribbons and bunches of roses tied up the table at the corners. In the middle was a lake with rose petals floating on it.

"That's where the ice pudding is to be," said Cook. [Page 211]

Two silver lions with wings had fruit on their backs, and the salt cellars were tiny birds drinking out of basins.

And all the winking glasses and shining plates and sparkling knives and forks–and all the food. And the little red table napkins made into roses. . . .

"Are people going to eat the food?" asked Sun.

"I should just think they were," laughed Cook, laughing with Nellie. Moon laughed, too; she always did the same as other people. But Sun didn't want to laugh. Round and round he walked with his hands behind his back. Perhaps he never would have stopped if Nurse hadn't called suddenly: "Now then, children. It's high time you were washed and dressed." And they were marched off to the nursery.

While they were being unbuttoned Mother looked in with a white thing over her shoulders; she was rubbing stuff on her face.

"I'll ring for them when I want them, Nurse, and then they can just come down and be seen and go back again," said she.

Sun was undressed first, nearly to his skin, and dressed again in a white shirt with red and white daisies speckled on it, breeches with strings at the sides and braces that came over, white socks and red shoes.

"Now you're in your Russian costume," said Nurse, flattening down his fringe.

"Am I?" said Sun. [Page 212]

"Yes. Sit quiet in that chair and watch your little sister."

Moon took ages. When she had her socks put on she pretended to fall back on the bed and waved her legs at Nurse as she always did, and every time Nurse tried to make her curls with a finger and a wet brush she turned round and asked Nurse to show her the photo of her brooch or something like that. But at last she was finished too. Her dress stuck out, with fur on it, all white; there was even fluffy stuff on the legs of her drawers. Her shoes were white with big blobs on them.

"There you are, my lamb," said Nurse. "And you look like a sweet little cherub of a picture of a powder-puff!" Nurse rushed to the door. "Ma'am, one moment."

Mother came in again with half her hair down.

"Oh," she cried. "What a picture!"

"Isn't she," said Nurse.

And Moon held out her skirts by the tips and dragged one of her feet. Sun didn't mind people not noticing him–much. . . .

After that they played clean tidy games up at the table while Nurse stood at the door, and when the carriages began to come and the sound of laughter and voices and soft rustlings came from down below she whispered: "Now then, children, stay where you are." Moon kept jerking the table cloth so that it all hung down her side and Sun hadn't any–and then she pretended she didn't do it on purpose. [Page 213]

At last the bell rang. Nurse pounced at them with the hair brush, flattened his fringe, made her bow stand on end, and joined their hands together.

"Down you go!" she whispered.

And down they went. Sun did feel silly holding Moon's hand like that but Moon seemed to like it. She swung her arm and the bell on her coral bracelet jingled.

At the drawing-room door stood Mother fanning herself with a black fan. The drawing-room was full of sweet smelling, silky, rustling ladies and men in black with funny tails on their coats–like beetles. Father was among them, talking very loud, and rattling something in his pocket.

"What a picture!" cried the ladies. "Oh, the ducks! Oh, the lambs! Oh, the sweets! Oh, the pets!"

All the people who couldn't get at Moon kissed Sun, and a skinny old lady with teeth that clicked said: "Such a serious little poppet," and rapped him on the head with something hard.

Sun looked to see if the same concert was there, but he was gone. Instead, a fat man with a pink head leaned over the piano talking to a girl who held a violin at her ear.

There was only one man that Sun really liked. He was a little grey man, with long grey whiskers, who walked about by himself. He came up to Sun and rolled his eyes in a very nice way and said: "Hullo, my lad." Then he went away. But soon [Page 214] he came back again and said: "Fond of dogs?" Sun said: "Yes." But then he went away again and though Sun looked for him everywhere he couldn't find him. He thought perhaps he'd gone outside to fetch in a puppy.

"Good night, my precious babies," said Mother, folding them up in her bare arms. "Fly up to your little nest."

Then Moon went and made a silly of herself again. She put up her arms in front of everybody and said: "My Daddy must carry me."

But they seemed to like it, and Daddy swooped down and picked her up as he always did.

Nurse was in such a hurry to get them to bed that she even interrupted Sun over his prayers and said: "Get on with them, child, do." And the moment after they were in bed and in the dark except for the nightlight in its little saucer.

"Are you asleep?" asked Moon.

"No," said Sun. "Are you?"

"No," said Moon.

A long while after Sun woke up again. There was a loud, loud noise of clapping from downstairs, like when it rains. He heard Moon turn over.

"Moon, are you awake?"

"Yes, are you?"

"Yes. Well, let's go and look over the stairs."

They had just got settled on the top step when the drawing-room door opened and they heard the party cross over the hall into the dining-room. [Page 215] Then that door was shut; there was a noise of "pops" and laughing. Then that stopped and Sun saw them all walking round and round the lovely table with their hands behind their backs like he had done. Round and round they walked, looking and staring. The man with the grey whiskers liked the little house best. When he saw the nut for a handle he rolled his eyes like he did before and said to Sun: "Seen the nut?"

"Don't nod your head like that, Moon."

"I'm not nodding. It's you."

"It is not. I never nod my head."

"O–oh, you do. You're nodding it now."

"I'm not. I'm only showing you how not to do it."

When they woke up again they could only hear Father's voice very loud, and Mother, laughing away. Father came out of the dining-room, bounded up the stairs, and nearly fell over them.

"Hullo!" he said. "By Jove, Kitty, come and look at this."

Mother came out. "Oh, you naughty children," said she from the hall.

"Let's have 'em down and give 'em a bone," said Father. Sun had never seen him so jolly.

"No, certainly not," said Mother.

"Oh, my Daddy, do! Do have us down," said Moon.

"I'm hanged if I won't," cried Father. "I won't [Page 216] be bullied. Kitty–way there." And he caught them up, one under each arm.

Sun thought Mother would have been dreadfully cross. But she wasn't. She kept on laughing at Father.

"Oh, you dreadful boy!" said she. But she didn't mean Sun.

"Come on, kiddies. Come and have some pickings," said this jolly Father. But Moon stopped a minute.

"Mother–your dress is right off one side."

"Is it?" said Mother. And Father said "Yes" and pretended to bite her white shoulder, but she pushed him away.

And so they went back to the beautiful dining-room. But–oh! oh! what had happened. The ribbons and the roses were all pulled untied. The little red table napkins lay on the floor, all the shining plates were dirty and all the winking glasses. The lovely food that the man had trimmed was all thrown about, and there were bones and bits and fruit peels and shells everywhere. There was even a bottle lying down with stuff coming out of it on to the cloth and nobody stood it up again.

And the little pink house with the snow roof and the green windows was broken–broken–half melted away in the centre of the table.

"Come on, Sun," said Father, pretending not to notice. [Page 217]

Moon lifted up her pyjama legs and shuffled up to the table and stood on a chair, squeaking away.

"Have a bit of this ice," said Father, smashing in some more of the roof.

Mother took a little plate and held it for him; she put her other arm round his neck.

"Daddy. Daddy," shrieked Moon. "The little handle's left. The little nut. Kin I eat it?" And she reached across and picked it out of the door and scrunched it up, biting hard and blinking.

"Here, my lad," said Father.

But Sun did not move from the door. Suddenly he put up his head and gave a loud wail.

"I think it's horrid–horrid–horrid! " he sobbed.

"There, you see! "said Mother. "You see!"

"Off with you," said Father, no longer jolly. "This moment. Off you go!"

And wailing loudly, Sun stumped off to the nursery.

First Mate Feathersword

2008-04-15T00:49:00.000-07:00

No the concert wasn't actually yesterday, I just didn't think of posting it here 'til now. =]

O_O!

2008-04-14T04:49:00.000-07:00

_{[IN A STAGE WHISPER] I think I killed our blog.}

Rain - A short story

2008-04-08T02:05:00.000-07:00

It is raining.
She smiles at the rain on the window and rolls over to wake him up. She starts as she rolls into emptiness. What a big bed. He doesn’t sleep here anymore. He doesn’t live here, doesn’t sleep next to her, doesn’t make the flat echo. She curls into a ball. The morning doesn’t seem quite so appealing anymore. She flops over to the couch, sighs and grabs the television remote. Saturday morning television. She turns it off.

As she lies on the couch, she wonders what he is doing. Is he asleep? Or eating breakfast? Or maybe, whispers a husky little voice in her mind, maybe he’s still curled up next to….No. She won’t think of that. She mopes into the kitchen. She looks around and can’t see anything to do in here. She isn’t hungry. She hardly eats anymore. She knows that he used to think that she was fat. She’s thinner now. Maybe she should send him a picture message? Maybe not. It’d be quicker to call. She glances at the phone. And looks away. She walks back into the bedroom. She tells herself she’s going back to make the bed, not running away. She is not afraid.

It is her flat, a small flat, but there’s nothing to hide from anymore. She enters her room and sees the cordless phone. She drops onto the bed, sighing. She pulls the covers over her head, curls into a ball again and tries not to think of him. She rolls onto her side, lowers the doona and peeks at the phone. She shuts her eyes quickly.

She should call him. She wants to call him.

She thinks some more. She knows she really shouldn’t call him. He left her; he should be the one to call. A sigh escapes. She pulls the doona over her head again, so she can’t see the phone. She shuts her eyes and tries to sleep.

Her mind drifts.

She remembers other days spent under doonas. Under this doona, in this bed. She was hiding then too. She can never remember what she did to make him so angry. She knows it must have been hard for him to live with her. She was always doing something wrong. She sighs. She wishes, under her breath, that she had tried harder to please him. Maybe if she called him again, if she told him she’d be better? This thought merits another sigh.

She rolls over, firmly putting her back to the phone. She tells herself to ignore him, to think about her family, her friends, anything else. Anything but him. Her friends then. She can see them in her mind. Laughing with her, laughing at her. She hasn’t seen them for so long. He didn’t get along with her friends. She scowls. She was thinking about him again. Why? What about her parents? He never liked them. To be fair, they didn’t like him either. She remembers the fights they’d had when she wanted to go home for Christmas.

Fights.

She kicks out, then lays flat, her arms and legs stretched out. This morning is bad. She’d managed the last two weeks without moping much. All those memories, all the good days, all the bad days. Her breath escapes slowly. She remembers a lot of bad days.

Arguments, tantrums.

She feels that she can’t have been as bad as he made out. She’d lived with other people before him. She hadn’t annoyed anyone else so much. She frowns, she’s still thinking of him. She wonders if he ever thinks about her any more. She reaches down to scratch her foot. She should just check, one more time, that he won’t change his mind. How could he not think of her? Maybe he really does miss her; maybe he’s just shy about calling her. Not that he was ever shy about anything. She remembers how people used to tell her she was shy around him. She supposes they just didn’t understand the relationship. The little voice whispers, traitorously, neither did you. Her frown deepens. She tells herself that she’s just being bitter, and that the relationship was just too complex to try to explain. Oh, yes, very complex. More subtle murmurs. You spoke and then he … No. The voice had no idea about it. The voice had no right to sneer at her. The voice had no right to judge. Everyone was always passing judgement about her.

Everyone. Him. The voice.

Well, she’d show the voice. She’d call him up and make the voice see how wrong it was. Oh God, she thinks, she was arguing with a figment of her imagination. She sighs and wriggles the doona down. She reaches for the phone. As she picks it up, something odd happens. Her throat tingles with remembered screams. She drops it.

Confusion.

Shaking her head as if to clear it, she places her hand on its cool plastic again. Her palm aches with not-quite-forgotten blows. She doesn’t understand. She wants to call him. She slowly removes her hand from the phone.

The voice. Could it be that the voice was making her think these things? No. She knows it is just her mind, seeing what she wants to. Or hearing, in this case. She knows the truth. She was worth nothing to him. He was all she had had, all she had lived for. And now he is gone. She knows what she should do. She collects her little friends from their hiding place. She walks into the kitchen, this time completely ignoring the phone. Arriving at the sink, she pours a cool glass of water. She moves the glass to her mouth like a woman drugged. Why had it taken her so long to understand that this is what he had wanted of her? He had begun the task, by hurting her so, and she would finish it. Now.

Freedom.

She would never see it, but hours later, he would stand in the kitchen; looking over the wreck of the woman he had loved. He would explain to the detectives, show them the little glass bottles, give them the doctor’s contact details. He would describe her instability, her insanity, the wounds sustained from her. He would remember how he had loved her, how he had been so afraid of her, how she had refused his offers of help. He would blame himself. He would cry.

But for now, she lies alone, and the rain continues.

HEY.

2008-04-06T03:49:00.000-07:00

We should make a new thread on the Rmy, to recruit new bloggers. y/y?

Also, POST MORE, YOU GUYS.
Come on!
BE GETTIN' BLOGGY WIF IT.

PS: I wrote a review of Panic! At the Disco's new album. Checkit, bb.

PPS: llama.

DESCRIBE ME IN THREE WORDS.

2008-03-30T19:32:00.000-07:00

GO!

Mean, fangirly, and impatient are already taken. Don't ask :c.

Smile Today

2008-03-28T17:00:00.000-07:00

myup! smile today, please :D
It's like written with graffiti on 2 places in my town, and everytime i see it i'm like smiling
and i dunno why.. Well, because it says smile today, doh XD
But it's actually pretty cewl, as I just found out, that the guy i like is probably the one who did it,
ROFL isn't that like, random? It sure is awesome tho :]

Me loves art. me loves DeviantART, who loves it too? please check out my page :D
http://tine-chan.deviantart.com/
I made it a few days ago :] and since i made it i've started to draw more again, so yay! I hadn't been drawing in AAAAAGES. :o
I've got some MCR and Naruto related drawings on there, as well as pretty colored drawings :D
mweep. I'm torotally feeling creative today, dont mind my art-obsession :p

also, it's the weekend again! :D:D Tine is in love with the weekends -nod-
And i know I'm not the only one, raise your hand when you're in love with it too! =D

Random lesson of the day: Wateshi nan namai [insert name] des, is Japanese for: My name is [insert the same name] :D

my plane had too much turbulence. and pretty font colors.

2008-03-23T12:10:00.000-07:00

so, I went to florida for a week for spring break. it was really warm and stuff and i loved it. but there is a lot of lizards where we stay and one really really HUGE one got into the house last year. so when we got there we found a lot of dead lizard babies.
o____O it was yuckie.
anywho, it was great.
i didnt get dressed until 12pm everyday.
we ate out.
and watched movies. we rented I Am Legend. and holy mother, it was sad. :[
but yeah we had fun and on both our flights there were little kids and they were really cute and funny.
our house is really cold.
where i live is really cold. i wanna go back to florida.
and i dont want school on tuesday.
:[

my dad just started a fire in the fire place :D

HAPPY EASTER TO PEOPLE WHO CELEBRATE EASTER!!!

:D