Pieces of Nurul Suhaimi

The Engagement day of Qaseh and Gareyt 221213.. Pictures say thousands words.

2014-01-06T19:39:00.000-08:00

Hati ini

2014-01-06T19:30:00.001-08:00

Tidak disini dan tidak jg di situ hati ini.. terus pejal, keras dan kaku..
x pula tumpahnya mutiara jernih dari bibir mata..
tidak juga ia berkaca..

Mana perginya hati rapuh serapuh dahan kayu reput di lantai bumi itu..
Mana perginya mata hening yang sering berkaca menggugurkan mutiara jernih ibarat titisan2 embun pagi yg gugur tatkala matahari cuba menyebar sinar..
Mana perginya juga emosi nipis yang sering carik terobek luka..

Kemana dia yang dulu..
Yang satu ketika lemah tertindih sepi tatkala hati dirobek hina..
Yang satu ketika dulu tak pernah percaya hatinya akan hancur dimamah kejujuran palsu sang pencinta penglipur lara..
Mana??

Hilangnya dia dibawa pergi oleh si pencinta hina..

Abah Mama tersayang

2014-01-06T19:29:00.001-08:00

Note-to-self..

Tak kira jam, hari, situasi, jauh, dekat, mama abah sentiasa ada bila kita perlukan.. sama ada nak luah perasaan kecewa, gembira, sedih, marah, terluka, stress, nak bermanja atau prlukan pndapat, mereka sentiasa ada nasihat dan pandangan yg paling bernas.. juga pendengar yg plg setia.. dan xpernah merungut dalam apa jua keadaan.. sentiasa nk yg trbaik untuk anak2.

Siapa kata mama abah jauh jadi xdpat spend banyak masa dgn kitorg.. jarak x mnjauhkan kasih syg, lg2 zaman teknologi ni. Cuma ada inisiatif nak contact diorang atau tak je.. Bak kata pepatah "biar jauh di mata tapi dekat di hati"...

"Masa dekat dimata x dihargai, bila dah jauh berbatu mula nak mencari".. ye la sebab dulu masa skolah duduk rumah dengan abah mama xde lagi nak belajar tentang kehidupan ni dari diorang. Now bila dah duduk jauh mula la trhegeh2 cari abah mama bila ada pape atau just nak manja2.. it's okay la nak manja2 dengan diorang.. bukan orang lain pun.. abah mama juga..

Mungkin saya habiskan banyak masa di tempat kerja tapi dari A to Z semua berkongsi dengan mama abah. Kadang2 even bestfriend pun tak tahu tapi mama abah dah tahu.. dan Kadang2 instinct parents ni dah tahu something before it ever happen. Jadi xpayahla nak sorok pape. Berkesudahan nanti tertangkap wet-handed. ;) Contoh senang nye bila awak tu dah fall in love ke, mula la apa yg direport kat abah mama tu lain dari lain.. biasa xkuar dinner jadi kuar dinner. Biasa weekend lepak shah alam jadi weekend lepak kl.biasa beramai-ramai ni berdua.. tapi tu contoh je.. kalau nak bagi contoh lain kang panjang sangat plak.

mama abah yg paling kenal kita n paling tahu siapa diri kita walau kita cuba menafikan... x ade siapa boleh nafikan kenyataan tu..

ye, sy memang anak abah mama.. mmg da umur20-an tapi sy masih anak kecil mereka.. terima dan telan kenyataan tu..

#throwback #qasehfamily

How to forgive someone who betrays you....

2013-11-08T03:47:00.004-08:00

(Read this few weeks back... You may read but you might not want to apply it)... just sharing.. Happy reading guys..

How to Forgive Someone Who Betrays You..

Betrayal is like a train wreck, everyone sees the victims after the accident but no one saw the accident coming. You never see betrayal coming until it happens and harms you. This is what makes it so painful to accept. To betray is defined as being handed over to the hands of the enemy, a violation of trust, or to violate by fraud or unfaithfulness. It could mean someone has revealed your secret or deceived you by letting something appear differently than it really is. The big question here is “Why”. Why did this person do this to me? Even in the law there is a dividing of circumstances.

1. Take control of your emotions. Don't get angry, anger is not a helpful emotion. It does not help someone to see straight.

2. Stay calm. If you have just been betrayed, you will have to be as calm as possible to protect yourself from more harm.

3. Resist the urge to beg and plead your position. That is a position of weakness not as a strong place. If someone has been unfaithful to you, let that person go to the other person. Never beg them to stay; you are worth more than that.

4. Walk away from them. This means go in the opposite direction from them. You do not chase them, you do not cling to them, and you let them do whatever they have chosen to do but without you in their life.

5. Do nothing, give them no resistance. This is power over your life and brings peace. They can live their life just as they want too, as long as it is away from you. Weak people will let them have it both ways. The strong position makes them choose which way they will live. They can be either with you or with the other but not with both of you. It may be great for them to have both of you but if it makes your life not peaceful why tolerate it?

6. Let go and let God take care of it. Sometimes we want to run the world but it is not our job. Your job is to live your life as peacefully as possible. All you have to do is forgive. You are forgiving for your benefit. Bad feelings do not make us happy nor do they make us become the best we can be. You can become happy again. There is a whole world out there to love again, a new relationship, a new friend you can even have a whole new family. Family is not only the people we share blood with, it is the people who love us.

7. Learn this lesson. Forgiveness does not mean we have to go to lunch with the person that betrayed us. Many times it is when we are gone from their life that the person sees how valuable we are in their life. But first we need to treat ourselves with value and respect and love our self before others will treat us with love and respect. This does not mean that we should ever allow anyone to physically abuse us.

8. Think no evil. Tell yourself that they would have done better if they knew how to do better and CHOSE TO FORGIVE them. Keep this saying in mind “How do you know what you don’t know if you don’t know what you don’t know?”

Jujur dalam Pandangan Islam

2013-10-14T00:44:00.002-07:00

Maksud Jujur Mengikut Pandangan Islam

Assalamualaikum...

Orang kata, " Berkata benarlah walaupun pahit ".

Sejak kecil kita telah dididik oleh kedua ibubapa kita supaya sentiasa jujur dalam setiap perbuatan dan percakapan.

Hal ini kerana perbuatan jujur akan membawa kepada kebaikan dan kebaikan itu akan membawa kita ke arah syurga.

Mengikut pandangan ulama islam, jujur itu adalah kesesuaian perkataan dan perbuatan yang dizahirkan mengikut gerak batinnya selama tidak tergelincir daripada landasan syariat. Orang yang jujur akan sentiasa memastikan setiap tindakan, percakapan, kelakuan dan sebagainya menepati ajaran islam.

Menurut Sayidina Ali, orang yang jujur akan mendapat 3 perkara iaitu kepercayaan, cinta dan rasa hormat. Cuba lah kita jawab dengan menggunakan akal fikiran kita sendiri persoalan di bawah.

Pertama: Adakah kita akan memberikan kepercayaan kita kepada seorang yang jujur atau orang yang suka berdusta( menipu ) ??

Kedua: Bertambah ke rasa cinta kita apabila mengetahui pasangan kita tidak jujur dalam perhubungan? Tidak kah kita rasa tertipu?

Ketiga: Adakah kita rasa hormat kepada seseorang yang sering menipu diri kita?

Sama-samalah kita renungkan.... Wallahualam..

Friends of mine

2013-09-26T20:35:00.001-07:00

Assalamualaikum...

Tiba-tiba rindu sangat kat someone.. Hmmm... Someone yang tak kurang istimewanya dalam hidup saya..

Maklumlah, ramai dalam list sesayangs saya ni...

Yang dirindui ni dua orang... Mula kenal mereka sejak Nurul berumur 17 tahun (which is lepas SPM and masa jejak kaki kat UiTM) Diorang sentiasa ada untk saya sampai la sekarang.. Waktu sedih, perit, nangis, kecewa, stress, bosan, marah, bengang dan gembira semua diorang ada.. Walau jarang2 jumpa sebab kesibukan krja and personal life, kami tetap dihubungkan melalui BBM, Whatsapp, WeChat, email dan telefon.*Macam promote plak kan. Kadang-kadang telefon company..(tu pun sebab kami kerja under group yg sama).

*PERINGATAN: I'm talking about ladies ye..So to my sayang Encik GA, jangan la terasa hati tau..awak pun dalam list sesayangs saya..Cuma nama awak kat tepi ada simbol love skit.. wink .*

Mula2 kenal dulu, macam2 kerenah kebudakan yg dah kita lalui....including kene serang dalam bilik waktu kat kolej dulu....(korang faham2 je la sape ye....xmau sebut kat sini...) sorg lagi slalu bw sy pg band club (tak ingat dah ape kita slalu panggil tu) n blajar music kononnya.tapi xreti2 gak smpi skang..jatuh cinta monyet ada la...(yg ni pun korg sndiri la tahu sape)..xkurang juga yg bwak sy join lelab kebudayaan..all the zapin steps still fresh in my mind..actually I really miss those moments dgn u guys..

Seorang ni asyik ada je untuk dgr sy bebel n marah2 pastu dia pun join skali..dia juga yg asyik suruh saya sabar2...pastu asyik bising jgn slalu minum coffee..rasanya dia sangat tahu my good and bad side..hehehe..so sape nak betul2 tahu pasal saya kene grab dia dulu kot..(ini rahsia antara kita je tau.) katanya lagi, kene selalu exercise untuk buang asid dalam badan..(okay semua yang jual pelekat2 untuk buang asid boleh tutup kedai kalau semua org selalu pg jogging.....nak kahwin tahun ni juga katanya...tapi kalau kamu kahwin tahun ni terpaksalah cari pengapit lain..hehehe

Yang sorg lagi, dari dulu asyik marah n suruh saya 'move on'...move on in terms of having a better career life ye...jgn duk kat takuk lama je..takut sgt nak jump katanya..mommy cantik to a daughter n son...grg xhengat punye..org melaka katakn...

To both of u... u guys really influenced my life...love u so much...thank u sbb marah2...

Those great idea of still having you guys as the musketeers in my life will never be regretted.....

Thank you liza n jaja...

Trainee Marcom

2013-05-21T02:45:00.001-07:00

Her last day here at Dorsett KL.

Ada masa datang lawat2 kitorang kat sini ya.

Appreciate all those memories k.

Hope to see you around.

Good luck!!!!!

Side mirror Viva ku dicuri

2012-11-26T23:34:00.001-08:00

Pagi2 lagi dah di beri dugaan. Dua2 side mirror dah kena curi.. Memang sengaja nak suruh labur kat kereta lah ni... Kereta dah merajuk sebab asyik kena ignore je..

Sedih lah..Siapa lah yang takde kerja sangat sampai side mirror pun nak curi. Ke nak ganti kat kereta korang sebab side mirror korang kena curi jugak. Apa2 pun, saya doakan korang taubat la cepat2 ye. Kang mati tak sempat taubat haru je. Kesian la kat mak bapak korang yang jaga korang dari kecik tu..

Semoga korang di beri hidayah dan petunjuk ke jalan yang benar ya...

Sekian....

No Title - can also be the title

2012-11-02T21:46:00.000-07:00

It has been a while since i last update my blog...

Stressful personal life + Wonderful working life

Seems balance...but then quite suffering...full of pain after 5.30pm and feel incredibly happy from 9.00am to 5.30pm (which is the working hours).

Yes, smile can hide so many pains and suffering but then your closed friends will really feel it. It's really not fair to them or even to myself... *blurgh....need coffee again i believe.

I try to hold on..long enough i believe but now here i go again, stumble down back to earth... tiring as how it sounds.

Blessed to have so many friends around to help me get back together. Thank you to Kavitha and Abang Redha for the brain-washed session last night.. I really need a tight slap on my face to wake me up.. Oh.. or as Abang Redha said "go to Starbucks, buy a coffee and splash it on your face... and make sure the coffee is hot".. I will remember that. To Kavitha, thank you for allowing me to introduce the other side of me to you...

Since Abang Redha is leaving, we will hardly hangout together. Thanks for all the Starbuck's treat for all the while abang...hehe

Okay, for the "loser of your own", please don't take me for granted.. I am tired and fade up of it. Stop asking me to do this and that. I'm not going to be the kind-hearted and polite little girl that you can fool around anymore.

Well, i might write this upon my frustration and appointments that i have towards you. But then I don't care. You should know what i feel towards you, what you did, what you didn't do and all the mistreat..

Okay...enough talking about you... till i write again...

~lots of love....xoxo~

Setiap kejadian.....

2012-10-12T02:52:00.000-07:00

Kita BERKENALAN secara tak sengaja, adalah PERANCANGAN ALLAH..
Kita BERKAWAN begitu lama bertahan pun, ALLAH yang RANCANG..
Kita dikurniakan RASA SUKA antara satu sama lain juga, ALLAH yang BERI..
Kita masih BERSAMA walau banyak dugaan menimpa, ALLAH yang ATURKAN..
Kita dikurniakan KESEDARAN dan KEINSAFAN juga kerana, ALLAH SAYANG PADA KITA..
Kita BERJAUHAN untuk mencapai REDHA-NYA juga, DIA yang RANCANG..
Kita BERDOA untuk KEBAHAGIAAN masing-masing juga, ALLAH yang DETIKKAN dalam hati kita..

Percayalah sesungguhnya segala yang belaku ada hikmah di sebaliknya..Kita hanya mampu merancang dan Allah S.W.T yang menentukannya..

Jawapan kepada sembilan persoalan Atheis

2011-09-14T10:55:00.000-07:00

Pada zaman dahulu, terjadinya suatu perdebatan antara golongan Atheis (tidak percaya kewujudan Tuhan) dengan seorang pemuda yang beragama Islam. Pemuda ini datang bersama gurunya dan gurunya telah diajak berdebat dengan golongan Atheis itu namun tidak dibenarkan pemuda itu, katanya: “Tak selayaknya seorang ulama besar berdebat di dalam majlis sebegini, cukuplah diserahkan kepada muridnya yang masih muda ini untuk berbincang-bincang dengan mereka-mereka ini.”

Semua yang ada di dalam majlis ketika itu terkejut dengan keberanian pemuda ini. Maka bermulalah perdebatan di antara mereka. Bila mana pemuda ini duduk duduk pada tempat yang disediakan maka serentak dengan itu salah seorang Atheis terus mengajukan soalan:

Soalan Pertama

Atheis: “Pada zaman bilakah Tuhan kamu dilahirkan?”

Pemuda tersebut tersenyum lalu menjawab: “Allah Taala tidaklah sesuatu yang dilahirkan. Jika Dia dilahirkan sudah tentu Dia punya bapa, Allah juga tidak melahirkan. Jika Dia melahirkan maka sudah tentu Dia punya anak.”

Soalan Kedua

Atheis: “Kalau begitu, bilakah pula Tuhan kamu wujud?”

Pemuda itu seraya menjawab: “Allah Taala itu wujud sebelum adanya zaman, sedangkan zaman itu sendiri adalah ciptaanNya, mana mungkin pencipta wujud selepas makhluk ciptaanNya.”

Soalan Ketiga

Atheis: “Cuba kamu berikan kepada kami sedikit gambaran tentang kewujudan Tuhan kamu yang tiada permulaan ini. Bagaimana mungkin sesuatu itu ada tanpa ada permulaannya?”

Pemuda itu menjawab: “Kamu pandai mengira?”

Kelompok Atheis itu menjawab: “Tentu sekali kami pandai mengira.”

Pemuda itu meneruskan ucapannya: “Bolehkah kamu beritahu aku apakah nombor sebelum nombor empat (4)?”

Atheis: “Nombor 3″
Pemuda: “Nombor sebelum 3?”
Atheis: “Nombor 2″
Pemuda: “Nombor sebelum 2?”
Atheis: “Nombor 1″
Pemuda: “Nombor sebelum 1?”
Atheis: “Tiada”

Pemuda itu tersenyum lalu memberikan penerangan: “Nah, kamu sendiri mengakui bahawa nombor 1 sebelumnya tiada mulanya. Nombor yang merupakan ciptaan Allah ini sendiri kamu akui bahawa tiada permulaan baginya. Apatah lagi pencipta kepada nombor itu sendiri?”

Terpinga-pinga kelompok Atheis tersebut dengan jawapan yang padat dan bernas daripada pemuda itu. Ternyata mereka silap perkiraan bila mana berhadapan dengan anak muda ini. Pada mulanya mereka merasakan bahawa anak muda ini mudah dikalahkan, namun telahan mereka ternyata menyeleweng. Mereka perlu lebih berhati-hati.

Soalan Keempat

Atheis: “Tahniah anak muda di atas jawapanmu sebentar tadi. Jangan sangka kamu berada di dalam keadaan yang selesa. Baik, tolong kamu terangkan kepada kami, pada bahagian manakah Tuhan kamu mengadap?”

Pemuda itu menjawab: “Jika aku bawa sebuah pelita yang dicucuh dengan api ke sebuah tempat yang gelap, pada arah manakah cahaya pada api tersebut mengadap?”

Kelompok Atheis menjawab: “Cahaya itu tentulah akan menerangi keseluruhan arah.”

Pemuda itu berkata: “Jika cahaya yang diciptakanNya itu pun kamu semua tidak mampu menerangkan pada arah manakah ia mengadap, inikan pula Sang Pemilik Cahaya langit dan bumi ini sendiri?”

Kesemua hadirin yang mendengar jawapan daripada pemuda itu bersorak kegembiraan. Kagum mereka dengan kepetahan anak muda itu.

Soalan Kelima

Atheis: “Bolehkah kamu terangkan kepada kami, bagaimana zat Tuhan kamu? Adakah ianya keras seperti besi? Atau jenis yang mengalir lembut seperti air? Atau ianya jenis seperti debu dan asap?”

Pemuda itu sekali lagi tersenyum. Beliau menarik nafas panjang lalu menghelanya perlahan-lahan. Lucu sekali mendengar persoalan kelompok Atheis ini. Orang ramai tertunggu-tunggu penuh debaran apakah jawapan yang akan diberikan oleh pemuda itu.

Pemuda itu menjawab: “Kamu semua tentu pernah duduk disebelah orang yang sakit hampir mati bukan?”

Atheis menjawab: “Tentu sekali.”

Pemuda itu meneruskan: “Bila mana orang sakit tadi mati, bolehkah kamu bercakap dengannya?”

Atheis menjawab: “Bagaimana mungkin kami bercakap dengan seseorang yang telah mati?”

Pemuda itu meneruskan: “Sebelum dia mati kamu boleh bercakap-cakap dengannya, namun selepas dia mati, terus jasadnya tidak bergerak dan tidak boleh bercakap lagi. Apa yang terjadi sebenarnya?”

Kelompok Atheis tertawa lalu memberikan jawapan: “Adakah soalan seperti ini kamu tanyakan kepada kami wahai anak muda? Tentu sekali seseorang yang mati itu tidak boleh bercakap dan bergerak . Ini kerana rohnya telah terpisah daripada jasadnya.”

Pemuda itu tersenyum mendengar jawapan mereka lalu berkata: “Baik, kamu mengatakan bahawa rohnya telah terpisah daripada jasadnya bukan? Bolehkah kamu sifatkan kepada aku sekarang, bagaimanakah bentuk roh tersebut. Adakah ianya keras seperti besi, atau ianya mengalir lembut seperti air atau ianya seperti asap dan debu yang berterbangan?”

Tertunduk kesemua Atheis tersebut bila mana mendengar persoalan pemuda bijak tersebut. Ternyata olokan mereka sebentar tadi kembali tertimpa ke atas mereka.

Kelompok Atheis menjawab dengan keadaan penuh malu: “Maaf, tentu sekali kami tidak dapat mengetahui bagaimana bentuknya.”

Pemuda itu lalu meneruskan bicaranya: “Jika makhluknya seperti roh itu pun kamu tidak mampu untuk menerangkannya kepada aku, bagaimana mungkin kamu ingin menyuruh aku menerangkan bagaimana bentuk Tuhan Pemilik Roh serta sekalian alam ini?”

Soalan Keenam

Atheis: “Di manakah Tuhan kamu duduk sekarang?”

Pemuda itu kembali bertanyakan soalan kepada mereka: “Jika kamu membancuh susu, tentu sekali kamu mengetahui bahawa di dalam susu tersebut ada terdapat lemak bukan? Bolehkah kamu terangkan kepada saya, dimanakah tempatnya lemak tersebut berada?”

Kelompok Atheis menjawab: “Kami tidak dapat menerangkan kepadamu dengan tepat kedudukan lemak di dalam susu tersebut. Ini kerana lemak itu mengambil keseluruhan bahagian susu tersebut.”

Pemuda itu seraya berkata: “Kamu sendiri lemah di dalam memberikan jawapan terhadap persoalan aku sebentar tadi. Jika lemak di dalam susu pun tiada tempat yang khusus baginya, masakan pula kamu ingin mengatakan bahawa Tuhan Pemilik Arasy itu ada tempat duduk khusus bagiNya? Sungguh aku pelik dengan persoalan-persoalan kamu ini.”

Soalan Ketujuh

Atheis: “Kami pelik bagaimana jika masuk ke dalam syurga ada permulaannya (iaitu selepas dihisab oleh Allah Taala di padang Mahsyar) namun bila mana sudah berada di dalamnya maka tiada lagi pengakhirannya (maksudnya tiada kesudahannya dan akan selama-lamanya di dalam syurga)?”

Pemuda itu tersenyum lagi lalu menjawab: “Mengapa kamu pelik dengan perkara tersebut. Cuba kamu lihat pada nombor. Ianya bermula dengan nombor satu bukan? Namun bolehkah kamu terangkan kepada aku apakah nombor yang terakhir di dalam senarai nombor?”

Terkelu kelompok Atheis ini untuk memberikan jawapan. Tentu sekali nombor tiada kesudahannya.

Pemuda itu tersenyum melihat kelompok Atheis ini terkebil-kebil tidak mampu memberikan jawapan. Kemudian beliau menyambung bicaranya: “Nah, kamu sendiri tidak mampu untuk menerangkan kepadaku apakah nombor terakhir bukan? Jawapannya sudah tersedia di hadapan mata kepala kamu.”

Soalan Kelapan

Atheis: “Kami ingin bertanya lagi, bagaimana mungkin seseorang di dalam syurga menurut Nabi kamu tidak akan kencing dan berak. Sedangkan mereka juga makan dan minum? Ini adalah perkara yang tidak masuk akal.”

Pemuda itu tenang membetulkan kedudukannya. Lalu beliau menjawab: “Aku dan kamu sebelumnya pernah berada di dalam perut ibu sebelum dilahirkan bukan? Sembilan bulan di dalam perut ibu, kita juga makan daripada hasil darah ibu kita. Persoalanku, adakah kamu buang air kecil dan besar di dalam perut ibumu? Sedangkan kamu juga makan di dalamnya?”

Sekali lagi kelompok ini terdiam membisu seribu bahasa. Padat sekali jawapan anak muda ini.

Soalan Kesembilan

Ia soalan terakhir yang ditanyakan oleh kelompok Atheis tersebut kepada pemuda itu bila mana mereka telah mati kutu dan sudah terlampau malu ialah berkenaan: “Jika kamu terlalu bijak , apakah yang dilakukan oleh Tuhanmu sekarang?”

Maka pemuda itu menjawab dengan tenang: “Sebelum aku memberikan jawapan kepadamu, eloklah kiranya kita bertukar tempat. Ini kerana kamu berada pada tempat yang tinggi sedang aku berada di bawah. Jawapan hanya boleh diberikan bila mana aku berada di atas mengambil alih tempatmu.”

Kelompok Athies itu lalu bersetuju dengan cadangan pemuda tersebut, lalu mereka bertukar tempat. Pemuda itu naik ke atas, manakala sang Atheis turun ke bawah.

Bila mana pemuda itu sudah berada di atas, terus beliau menjawab: “Kamu bertanya sebentar tadi apakah yang Tuhanku lakukan sekarang bukan? Jawapannya ialah, Tuhanku sedang meninggikan yang Haq (dengan menaikkan pemuda itu ke atas) dan menurunkan yang Batil (dengan menurunkan kelompok Atheis tersebut ke bawah).”

Akhirnya mereka mengakui bahawa tiada lagi persoalan yang ingin ditanyakan malah kesemuanya telah dipatahkan oleh pemuda itu dengan penuh hikmah.

Walau sudah hampir ribuan tahun pemuda itu meninggalkan kita, namun namanya disebut orang seolah-olah beliau masih hidup di sisi kita. Al-Fatihah buat al-Imam al-A’dzam Abu Hanifah Nu’man bin Thaabit r.a serta kepada seluruh gurunya dan kesemua muslimin dan muslimat sama ada yang amsih hidup atau yang telah wafat.

Cuma berkongsi. Dipetik dari http://mediasiber.com/jawapan-kepada-sembilan-persoalan-atheis/

From the bottom of my heart - Dedicated to my late Grandma....

2011-07-19T10:12:00.000-07:00

Dear GRANDMA...........

Just want to share what I have wrote 5 years ago....Writing with tears in my eyes and regret for what I had not done for her...I wrote this just a few days after I lost 1 of my LOVES ONE....She left us forever but she is still ALIVE in our mind and heart....I dedicated this to my BELOVED GRANDMA....Mrs Philis Percil Pereira...May she Rest In Peace.....

She was a lady, a wife, a mother, a grandma & also a friend
She had spent her life time pleasing and appreciating others
She was an ordinary lady
with extraordinary strength to love and forgive others
Forgive and forget was what she practiced and taught others
Never ask but always giving without asking the reason why

Lady with a big and brave heart
Would do anything to pleased her loves one,
even sometimes it do hurt her own feelings
She loved her husband, her children & her grandchildren with all her heart
I keep wondering, do she received the same love from us
She kept all the hardness of life to her ownself

We don't even know she is leaving us
She kept it to herself
Is it no one bother to ask or us is too busy to realize
We know when nothing else can be done,
when she is just waiting for the time to leave us forever
All the pain, all the suffering, she kept it to her ownself
Do not want us to worry about anything and just living a normal, busy and chaotic life
And we had been ignoring the most important things in our life; HER

Will it be the same if she shared?
Will it be the same if we ask?
Will it be the same if we just stop thinking about our ownself for a second
and think just about her for that one second?

She ask nothing from us
She just keep giving, her entire life is always about us
She loves us so much and she kept all the sadness and pain she felt, for her ownself

It was way too late to regret
We learned from what had happened and pray same things will not happen in future
For the love she nourished us,
we will appreciate and let the love grow in our heart and in our family
Keeping her in our mind and soul

All the meaningful thought she taught us
All the message she deliver to us
All the advises she had been advising us
All the memories while she alive
...will always live as long as we are breathing
And we will tell the story of her to our children as well...
We love you with all the love we have.....and we will miss you forever

(November'06)
your grandaughter (very closed to you....seeing and feeling the pain of yours but do not know about your CANCER either..Im sorry Grandma, but nothing much can I do when I'm not knowing....)

*****Forgiveness means letting go the past while you learned from it......Love you all...

The Reason - To Forgive

2011-07-17T10:31:00.000-07:00

THE REASON
I am not a perfect person
There is many things I wish I did not do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do this things to you (Im just being me)
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I have found out a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
Im sorry that I hurt you
Its something I must live everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear
I have found out the reason to show
A side of me you did not know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you..

I should have said this (dedicated this song) to you long time ago...which is years ago...but it seems to be stuck just there....in my totally broken heart....I used to give a chance to US, which seems so great for several years...but then, again, it failed...
I did not put all the mistake on just U....because even if I try to deny it, there are also my mistake in our "Fallen Apart" relationship....Im sorry if it hurt you so much, because I know how it had felt...as I felt it too...I cant tell the truth as it will not only destroy us but also other relationship of yours....it is better to sacrifce US rather than ALL...

Just hope that you will find a better "other part of u" in someone else...as it will never be ME anymore...Let our "used to be dream" just flow with the wave of life...and take it as a part of life and experience that we will remember as a history of our life..Live your life happily as every human being should enjoy life and be grateful as you are still alive....God Bless you..Amin.....

The only reason Im doing and writing this is to forgive and be forgiven so that no one will misunderstood anyone of us....and for those who know the reason, please keep it to yourself and you guys too, enjoy your life and dont burden yourself too much..For those who do not know, dont misjudge by just looking and not trying to understand...Everybody should realize that everything happens for a reason and only God knows why...

As I believe, forgiveness is letting go of the past and when you forgive, you in no way change the past but you sure do change the future. .The secret is you will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well...

***My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can....I would not want anything to stop me from living my life...Love you all...Daa....

Something to share : MARRIAGE

2011-06-07T10:30:00.000-07:00

I had read this story a few months ago (and I am going to share it with you..)...and it still touch my heart and bring tears to my eyes every time I read it..It is so great what women can do to show their LOVE...and what man will do for LOVE...No offense to anyone...

However it is, just to say that LOVE is everywhere around you. It is just you, whether to take it and keep it to yourself or share it with others...Do not wait till it is too late to realize that LOVE is meant for everyone and to be given and taken...Appreciate LOVE while you have it....

The given title by its author is MARRIAGE...

Let the story begin.....................

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outsidethe door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

See you again....

Pieces of my life....

2011-06-04T12:27:00.000-07:00

Believing today is a great day, really makes my life great as The Law of Attraction; what you believe is what you attract to happen in your life. This is pieces of my life today....

Where am I today

> Kok Lanas, Kelantan

Weather

> It was a very hot and sunny day.....I think it has been the longest summer ever....

Where have i been today

> Tesco Kota Bharu

What I remember the most today

> Spend less than 20 minutes (which i think the shortest 20 minutes I have ever had) talking to my childhood friend, Iwan (ohh...so sweet...not that sweet as u think...) We rarely meet because of the distance..We have feeling to each other before...Which is when we are 15 years old..But now, we are both matured enough to think..LOL..

What makes me tired today

> Not enough sleep last night as I slept at 4 in the morning..and today is a busy day...ooh....and we did a small and simple birthday celebration for my brother, which his 14th birthday is yesterday (3rd June)

What is the best thing I ate today

> Macaroni Carbonara, Chicken Lasagna and Fruit Flan.

What i have made to make people happy today

> I've arranged the birthday celebration...buy the cake...cook the food...and invite my auntie and her family together...

What people made for me to make me happy

> My friends said they miss me so much..Thanks Fani, Nasuha and Luqman...I feel so much appreciated to be a friend of yours....Especially Luq....Thanks dear...

What lies do i make

> I lied to myself that I am always happy and I have no problems bothering me at all....At least I believe and make people believe that I am really okay..

What I have learned today

> Simple thing we did may bring the biggest smile to others..

A new day will start and a new story will begin with it...