Meijer Brand Chocolate Sauce

Runkeeper, and Being Accountable

2015-09-02T11:12:00.001-07:00

About 5 months ago, I decided to start running because I had been noticing my heart a little too much for my liking. Anytime I did any amount of physical activity (stairs, jog, walk to the fridge, lift a piece of cake), I noticed that my heart was beating a little too hard, and my pulse was seeming a little too fast. Going in to the doctor for a cold or an infection often yielded remarks like “Is your blood pressure always this high?” or “That can’t be right, let’s check that again.”

When I was in Jr/Sr high, I ran cross country for 3 years. I remember getting a physical where my blood pressure was so low they checked it twice (opposite of my more recent BP experiences). In those days, I could eat whatever I wanted with no repercussions because I was running 8 miles every day during practice. It was then that I learned the habit of eating an entire pizza all at once. But high schooler I am no longer.

I started realizing that I apparently do not have the body type to just eat what I want and not work it off. I am 28 years old, so I’m still fairly young – but I am not a kid anymore. I need to be proactive about my health. I am also not obese by any means – but if we are talking about BMI, I am solidly in the overweight category. To top it off, I have a kid (he just turned two). I need to be healthy.

So I decided to start running. And to make sure that it doesn’t disrupt my life timewise, I decided to run in the mornings, before I get ready for work. The only problem that comes up with this is my apparent inability to get up at 5 am with any consistency. I am working on it!

In any case, this is where Runkeeper comes in. It is one of many apps available out there that track your activity via GPS. If I initiate it before a run, it maps my route, tells me how long I ran, how fast I ran (on average), and how many calories I burned. This is the free version. I could pay a few bucks to get more features, but I’m not made of Runkeeper money. Are you made of Runkeeper money?

So here is my first (recorded) run, my longest run, and my most recent run.

Look at that progress! First of all, I got a shiny new Note 4 in May 2015, so the maps became much sharper since the GPS functionality of my phone was better. I promise, I didn’t cut through yards. The more accurate the GPS, the more accurate the mileage. So I started out running about a mile and a half. Now, I run usually in the area of 4-5 miles when I go. Not super fast progress – I’m not about to go run a half marathon or anything – but progress all the same. More importantly, even though I haven’t seen a very drastic weight loss (or any), I feel so much better. My legs feel stronger. I feel better (usually) about myself. My endurance is better. And, most importantly, I am not winded by common, everyday actions like walking up my front steps or chasing my son around the house. I haven’t been back to the doctor for a checkup yet, but I will soon – and I am confident (well, mostly hopeful) that I won’t get that same incredulous reaction when my blood pressure is checked.

Perhaps the best thing about Runkeeper (and other apps like it) is that it’s also a social network. I can add other people who have the app as friends, and we can compare runs. If I run with one of them, we can tag each other in the activity. That might not seem like a big deal, but running together is far better than running alone. When I run alone, I give up faster. I don’t run as far because I have no one there to hold me accountable. When I run with someone, it both keeps my mind off the horrible activity I am pushing myself through (because we are often distracting each other by talking), and it keeps me accountable because I don’t want to be the one to cut the run short (unless I really have to). Plus, every time I finish a run, my friends are notified – in this way, the app keeps me accountable by letting everyone on my list know whether I’m running or not.

It’s a great app – and I definitely recommend it. 10/10 would run again.

A Repost of a Repost

2015-08-31T18:41:00.001-07:00

So I was recently tasked with writing a review of my favorite scene in a TV show / movie / whatever, and it occurred to me that I’ve already done that. This sort of thing comes up so often, in fact, that I’ve already written a post about that review. So here it is! Reposted (from a repost) from 2/5/11, slightly edited.

Enjoy.

I'd like to talk a little bit about my favorite movie, mainly because I've just recently decided (or realized) what it is. It's Wes Anderson's The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou.
Why?
Because towards the end of the movie, in the scene where they find the Jaguar Shark, there is more emotion in Bill Murray's expressionless face than I think I have ever seen on an actor's face ever. And that scene is when you (or I, I guess) realize what the movie is actually about. It's not just a quirky, dry comedy about life on the sea, and it's not just a love story, and it's not just about revenge or rescue.
It's a story about a guy who just wants to be admired, like he used to. It's about a guy who just doesn't care enough about anything anymore to care about anything anymore. And then he starts to. It's about a guy who, at the end of everything he's ever had, finds a little something else to have.
And then he loses it, and it's too much. Everything is too awful and beautiful and meaningful and meaningless and he can't decide which he wants to believe, because he believes everything and nothing, and he just wants the world to leave him alone for a while. Provided that it still takes care of him.
And then everything breaks again. But as its breaking it's fixing everything that's been wrong with his life. And at the end, he is happy in his misery.
That's what I see in Bill Murray's expressionless face at the end of that movie.
If you haven't seen it, you need to watch it. And if you have seen it, but don't really understand what I'm saying, you should watch it again.
And if you've seen it, and you hate it, then I guess that's ok too. We just have different tastes.

A Picture a Day for a Week

2015-06-01T10:27:00.003-07:00

Sunday, May 24

Today we went to the Hesston Steam Museum in Hesston, Indiana. It was pretty cool - they have many vintage/refurbished steam engines of all kinds - trains, sawmills, cranes, and a popcorn machine (I had no idea such a thing ever existed). We took the kid for rides on some of the trains. He had fun, but got a little sick of it after a while.

Monday, May 25

Went for a run in the woods today, on a short leg of the Wabash Heritage Trail. It was super humid and gross.

Tuesday, May 26

This morning Clark decided to do some reading on his own. Reading is a full-contact sport.

Wednesday, May 27

Today I got a Surface Pro 3 to use for work. It's awesome.

Thursday, May 28

Last day of school! Some kid thinks I'm an octopus or something.

Friday, May 29

Today we took my mom to lunch at Scotty's Brewhouse to repay her for babysitting. I had a burger topped with jalapeño poutine. It was dopelicious.

Saturday, May 30

Open bars make for fun weddings.

Wirebirds (A Very Short Story)

2015-05-13T18:43:00.001-07:00

Today I felt the curve of the earth.
The horizon bowed at my feet.

- -

     “You see that?” The old man was talking, breaking the silence in which we had until then uncomfortably existed, amongst the smells of leaky exhaust and ancient leather. “That’s where you want to be.” I looked, but couldn’t see anything important. “Up there, boy! On the wire.” He pointed.
     “The birds?” I had no idea what he was talking about. The light turned green.
     “The ones on the wire.” There was a flock of birds in the median. Most of them were on the ground, pecking and eating and jumping – busily doing bird things. Some of them, about twenty or so, had perched high above the rest on a phone line. “That’s where you want to be,” he repeated, “up outta the shit. Up where you can breathe.”
     I looked at my grandfather – really looked at him – and for maybe the first time in my life I saw him as the person he was. Not as an occasional giver of money and interminable stories, but as a flesh-and-blood human man. A man who had scraped and fought his entire life to live in his own tiny house in the poor part of a town that had grown up around him. A man who should own the respect I had never thought to give him.
     A horn sounded behind us. “Grandpa? The light’s green.”
     “Ah shit,” he said, and stepped on the gas – too hard. The old truck lurched, stalled, and coughed to a stop. “Go around!” he yelled, waving his hand out the window. He laughed, and looked at me. “What was I talking about?”
     “Birds.”
     “Oh yeah.” He turned the key, the engine sputtered to life and we continued on. “Birds.”

     We finished the drive in a very different kind of silence than the one in which we had started.

- -

Gravity’s weight had me defeated,
and the core of the earth – I could feel its heat.
-Attack in Black

Spoiler: Long and Embarrassing

2015-05-04T20:02:00.001-07:00

When I started college in 2005, I did what a lot of people who start college do: I looked at a guitar and thought “Oh yeah. I’m gonna learn me some of that.” So I learned a couple of chords from my friend Rob and decided I was a musician.

Now, what I should have been doing had I been actually serious about learning a new instrument was actually focus on learning that instrument. Instead, I focused on writing lyrics to songs I would never record or sing – because I am not a good vocalist and while I practiced guitar long enough to develop calluses on my fingers, I did not practice long enough to learn more than three chords and definitely did not practice long enough to be able to sing and play at the same time.

But I did learn enough to transition between those three chords (It might even be four)! As you can hear in the following clip:

Why I am not rich and famous, I will never know.

So guitar was evidently not my thing, nor was it going to be. Not because I was unable to learn how to play, but because I lack the motivation and discipline to learn an instrument when there are things like video games and television in this world.

I am very good at playing video games and watching television. I would enter into a television-watching contest if there was such a thing. Maybe there is. Stay tuned.

In any case, I did continue to write lyrics to songs that would never exist. Poetry was kind of my thing the first two years of college. Maybe I was kind of angsty. Maybe it was being on my own for the first time in my life. Or maybe it was because I really liked writing poetry. Who knows? I eventually grew out of it.

Whatever the reason, I have decided to share some of this potentially embarrassing writing with you, my very few readers. Keep in mind that I was very heavily influenced by bands such as Something Corporate (& Jack’s Mannequin), Dashboard Confessional, Brand New, Zox, Linkin Park, Jimmy Eat World, Copeland, etc. Please don’t judge too harshly.

Keep in mind too that these were supposed to eventually turn into songs – my friend Rob had a good singing voice, and he was the one teaching me to play guitar. I (maybe even we) had dreams of becoming a famous singing/songwriting duo someday, which were probably crushed when I decided that playing video games was way more immediately gratifying. Anyway – to the embarrassing things!

CHILDREN OF THE NIGHT
(Influence level: Linkin Park)
(Embarrassment Level: HIGH)

Hiding in the shadows
You are all the same
Dancing in the moonlight
Playing twisted games

Drawn towards the perilous
Burning with desire
Throwing caution to the wind
You fuel the darkest fire

Children of the night
You were angels, angels
Come into the light
And rewrite your life

Sometimes I imagine
That you are just a dream
Slinking, sliding, slithering
You make me want to scream

Running blindly through the muck
I’m giddy with the fright
I curse the silence of the moon
You trap me with delight

Children of the night
You were angels, angels
Come into the light
And rewrite your life

Forgotten by society
You shun the modern world
Living in proximity
Your words are never heard

Banished to the darkness
Your pain just never ends
Forgotten by your family
And Hated by your friends

Children of the night
You were angels, angels
Come into the light
And rewrite your life

Not trying to be normal
Not trying to fit in
Looking past the darkness
To see the light within

POLITELY BRUISED AND BROKEN
(Influence Level: Something Corporate)
(Embarrassment Level: Moderate)

Politely bruised and broken
You are lying on the floor
Too nice to speak your mind
To willing to give more than he deserves

Wake up and smell the flowers dear,
You need to get away from here
Before you die

You’ve all-important vows
You think are worth the toughing-out
Too loving to let go
Too ready to miss out on a better life

Try hard to make it on your own
You would be better off alone
You don’t need this

Without him you are elegant,
Unstifled, bright and pure.
Too pretty to be real
Too certain to be sure your life is right

Look up and see the newborn sun
Give that bright smile to everyone
Give it a try

Your life becomes a cancer
That will rot away your heart
Too simple to be dangerous
Too familiar to be part of what you hate

Can’t tell you how you’re supposed to feel
It’s something you need to reveal
All on your own

Your secrets are a cure
That helps to only make it worse
Too blind to see the faults
Too blessed to be cursed, you are so young

You are so young

ASYLUM
(Influence Level: ???????)
(Embarrassment Level: Moderately High)

Come inside to see
All the things you’ll never be
Look around and you will learn
When your dreams begin to burn

You call yourself my friend
But your laughter never ends
You are laughing with my pain
But your laughter is insane

Can’t you see that I’m about to snap?
Helplessly I fall into your trap
You twist my words so I can’t say a thing
You bind my ears so I can’t hear you sing

I step so carefully
On the surface of the sea
Jump above and try to dive
But I fall into the sky

Can’t you see that I’m about to snap?
Helplessly I fall into your trap
You twist my words so I can’t say a thing
You bind my ears so I can’t hear you sing

I feel your sick delight
In the darkness of the night
You fooled me for so long
Now I find I don’t belong

My life is caving in
Around the places I have been
Put my mind up on a shelf
And please come save me from myself

SPARKS
(Influence Level: Dashboard Confessional)
(Embarrassment Level: Fairly low)
Still one of my favorites.

The city whirls around me
Fills my head to burst
The sidewalk melts and I dive in headfirst

I wake up and I’m driving
Your picture on my dash
I see it and I smile for what we had

The radio sings to me sadness
While the full moon shines in through the glass
And I want to go to sleep so bad it hurts
but first I need to be sure that you’ll be there

I pull into a dark house
I never want to leave
The hospital bracelet hides beneath my sleeve

My thoughts lie down beside me
They whisper to my heart
But I can’t change how everything’s my fault

The radio sings to me sadness
While the full moon shines in through the glass
And I want to go to sleep so bad it hurts
but first I need to be sure that you’ll be there

The city whirled about me
We were spinning in the street
I could feel the sparks beneath my feet

The city whirled around you
You were flying through the air
The last thing I remember was the smell
Moonlight on the flowers
Was the sight
Spinning in the street
Of your hair

AMNESIAC
(Influence Level: Jimmy Eat World & The Calling)
(Embarrassment Level: None!)

Misty Monday morning
You walked out of my door
Memories are slipping
What do we do this for?

Cry out for an answer
Helpless futility
Memories are slipping
This life isn’t free

I picked it up and I tried
To fake your brutality
But the thing you never realized
The answer was always me
Cry yourself to sleep tonight
Look inside and you will see
Your strong guilt-free exterior
Is breaking at the seams
And the thought of me is haunting all your dreams

Feelings buried deep
Locked away forever
Memories are slipping
Ties you tried to sever

Living on your own
You are living all alone
Memories are slipping
What good have you done?

Look where we are now
Did you know that it would end like this?
Did you know we were bound to miss?
Tangled in all this bliss
Like this

You are wasting time
You wasted all my life
Memories are slipping
It serves you right

So there you have it. Some embarrassing pieces of my past. Although those last two (Sparks and Amnesiac) I actually still like quite a lot. My previously-mentioned friend Rob actually sat down and recorded a rough take of Amnesiac with guitar and vocals that I think is pretty dang good considering it was recorded in one take sometime in 2006 on some kind of potato microphone. With a little polishing and practice I think it would sound awesome.

To leave you, here’s a video of that very recording with some doodle I doodled after he recorded it.

P.S.
To double-leave you, here is a short poem that was actually published (front page!) in one of the Purdue Exponent’s student literary editions, so I was fairly puffed up for a few days after that.

THE BACK OF YOUR EYELIDS

What do you see on the back of your eyelids?
What do you see in your dreams?
Follow a road to the back of your mind
Where nothing appears as it seems;
Where your unspoken secrets are living their lives
And only in sleep are they free.
How can a question be answered with yes?
How can we answer with no?
Setting a price on the weight of the world
Is like standing a candle in snow.
And the melting puddles of our tired lives
Will steam up to the stars and glow.
Have you ever really looked out the window?
Have you ever looked at the scene?
We’re building a bridge to the end of the world
Just to fall back into the sea.
And everyone’s lives are one and the same
The killer, the preacher, and me.

For those with nothing else to do.

2015-04-06T18:52:00.001-07:00

Let's talk about alcohol. More specifically, let's talk about what I would consider to be my first drink. Of alcohol. Of something alcoholic.

Excluding, of course, the occasional glass of champagne or limoncello at family gatherings, my first drink was a glass of Bloomington's own Oliver "soft red" wine after a calculus exam. I was twenty, which is a year younger than the legal age but several years after (I am sure) many of my peers. That first glass with friends turned into a game of wine shot glass checkers with friends, which turned into a pretty amusing walk back home.

Once I had discovered that having a few drinks was in most respects very excellent, I was all about trying new ones. I had my first shot of terrible vodka (unchased because chest hair) at a party with high school friends, first beer at a similar party, probably while playing beer pong. I did not really understand the dangerous potency of liquor though, and drank far too much of it on a couple of occasions. Learning to drink when the only people around you are college students is not a great idea.

Still, having a cold beer or a well-mixed cocktail with friends (especially in the summertime) is the best. Nowadays I prefer a nice cloudy wheat beer, though most will do in a pinch. Tequila, whether by itself or in a classic margarita is my liquor of choice, with bourbon right behind. To leave you, here are a couple of my favorite cocktail/drink recipes - if you are so inclined.

Grilled Pineapple margarita
Made with mezcal rather than typical tequila, this is an amazing summer cocktail. Enjoy with friends, or drink the whole dang pitcher by yourself – preferably on a beach at sunset.

Mexican mule
Tequila, ginger beer, lime. Great combination.

Old fashioned
I prefer to use Woodford Reserve in my Old Fashioned, but Knob Creek or Jim Beam will do just fine.

Whiskey Smash
Ditto on the bourbon (see above).

New York Sour
Don’t get freaked out by the raw egg. It’s totally fine.

My Time in the 205/285

2015-03-28T20:46:00.001-07:00

In the fall of 2006, I was starting my sophomore year of college at Purdue. It was to be a very important year for me, in several different ways – and most of those ways hinged on a couple of very important classes.

I was clearly awesome. And hella skinny.

EDCI 205 (Exploring Teaching) and EDCI 285 (Multiculturalism & Education) are two required courses for education majors at Purdue. I believe 205 is the first early field experience education students participate in although I could definitely be wrong about that. 285 basically exists to make us aware as human beings (but mostly as teachers) that we will come into contact with many different types of people, and how all these cultures will mix together in different ways but we have to teach them anyway. Or something. It was a long time ago.

The important thing about these two classes in the fall of 2006 is that they were being taught by two friends, Bruce and Sybil, who decided that instead of teaching two separate classes of the same group of students, they would just teach their sections together. I’m not sure if it was the clear enjoyment of what they were doing they brought with them every day, the in-depth discussions about our field experiences, or the frequent debates which would inevitably erupt between Bruce and members of the class who didn’t totally agree with his point of view (always fun to watch), but that class has cemented itself in my college experience.

Of course, it’s also the class where I met Mike – who I soon found out was in the Crazy Monkeys, an improv comedy group I saw during my freshman year and for some reason thought to myself “yeah, I could do that” despite having done nothing like it ever before. Becoming good friends with Mike during our time in the 205/285 led to me auditioning for and becoming a new member of The Crazy Monkeys later that semester. It is completely fair to say that my life would be absolutely different than it is now had I not met Mike and made that decision to try out. Almost all of the friends I either regularly hang out with or stay in frequent contact with came from my time in the Crazy Monkeys. To say it was a major component of my college experience is an understatement. It defined who I was and who I would become in many parts of my life, and I am very grateful for the time I had with the group. Improv is still a huge part of my life, and I am not sure what would have replaced it had I never tried it out.

But wait! The 205/285 Mash-up Bruce & Sybil Variety Hour was also the class where Mary and I met each other, and through a mutual friendship with the aforementioned Mike, became close friends. Most of our time together was doing mutual friendship things, like getting McDonalds Happy Meals or going to see comedy shows on campus. It wasn’t until the spring semester that things got real real. Bruce announced at some point during the fall that he would be teaching a different class in the spring – EDCI 490 (the title was something like “Continuing Issues of Multicultural Education”) and that we were all welcome to take it – and that it could be worth graduate credit if we didn’t have an elective slot for it to fill.

So I decided to take that class – and so did Mary. And probably nothing would have happened between us at all but for one tiny thing that happened one day. Mike maintains that he had some kind of behind-the-scenes puppet master nonsense going on – which may have been part of it, admittedly. The catalyst for what would come next, however, came one day when I got to class and saw that Mary had sat in my seat. For whatever reason, we always sat with our desks in a circle in that class – I think Bruce liked having discussions better that way – and I always sat against the back wall near an audio cabinet. There was no real reason, it was just where I sat the first day and things like that have a way of staying.

Anyway, Mary was sitting in my seat. And I said “Hey, you sat in my seat!” And she said “So just sit next to me.” And I did. And so in February 2007 we were dating, in June 2008 we were engaged, in June 2009 we were married, and in August 2013 we had a son.

I’m not sure if the content of the classes was that memorable or had any profound effect on me as a person. The field experience was just visiting a school – and having been in school all my life, it was about what I expected. Learning about different cultures is always important, but not only was I attending a fairly diverse campus, I have been brought up to be a tolerant and accepting person (or so I like to think), so it was just reinforcement of what I already practice and believe.

What really made the 205/285 important for me was who I met and where they led me. Meeting Mike and Mary took my life where it needed to go, and I would have neither the friends nor the experiences that surround me now. I would be a completely different person, and I am not confident he would be the better for it.

In fact there’s absolutely no way.

Chili. Again. I know.

2015-03-09T19:33:00.001-07:00

All right. I know I’ve blogged about chili once or twice before. But my recipe for chili has gone through a few changes for the better. When I read that original recipe, posted long-ago, I shudder to think that someone might have read it and actually made that pot of muck. It’s not actually that bad, but there are some order and technique issues that I have since figured out and improved upon. As my wife said earlier tonight – my chili is a metaphor for my ascent into adulthood.

I am pretty sure she was kidding.

Anyway, I made chili tonight. It was excellent. I have leftovers if you want some.

YOU WILL NEED:

1 onion
1 green pepper
1 jalapeño
1 tbsp minced garlic
spices:
- chili powder
- cumin
- garlic powder
- garlic salt
- oregano
- thyme
- dill
- bay leaves
1 lb ground turkey
1 lb ground beef (85/15 or higher)
6 oz tomato paste
SPECIAL SPICES
- ground chipotle pepper
- cocoa powder
- cinnamon
12 oz beer
2 (15 oz) cans diced tomatoes
1 (15 oz) can stewed tomatoes
1 (15 oz) can black beans
2 (15 oz) cans great northern beans

YOU WILL NEED TO:

1. Chop up the onion and peppers.

Use a jalapeno’s worth of canned slices if you don’t have a fresh pepper. No biggie.
Try to get the dice fairly small, but not tiny. It all depends on how big you like the chunks of things in your chili. I’m okay with some chunk.

2. Combine them in a medium-to-large pot over medium-high heat with some cooking oil.

Add the minced garlic after a couple of minutes, when the onions and peppers start to soften. Let that cook for about five minutes, stirring fairly often.

3. Add the meat and spices.

Chunk the meat up and mix well with the onions and peppers. Liberally add spices to your heart’s content. Do not skimp on the chili powder and cumin. You can never have enough. I promise. Cover the lid and ignore that pot for about 5-6 minutes. Lift the lid and your meat will be cooked! Magic.

4. Add the tomato paste and SPECIAL SPICES.

I know a lot of people who use tomato sauce in their chili. They’re wrong. We’re not making minestrone here, people. Stir the tomato paste until it coats the meat, and now is when we add the special biz.

Add a good heaping tablespoon of cocoa powder (trust me), a good heaping tablespoon of cinnamon (I promise), and add a nice coating from one end of the pot to the other of the ground chipotle (zomg). OH YEAH. Stir that biz in.

Let it cook for a solid 5 or 6 minutes, still at medium-high heat. We want to cook off most of whatever liquid we have left and let the tomato paste get a nice toasted flavor.

You’ll smell it when it’s ready.

You’ll know.

5. Pour in the liquid gold.

Not Velveeta! I swear, if you put Velveeta in this - -

Pour in a can or bottle of whatever blue-ribbon-winning beer you happen to have on hand. It will help to de-glaze the bottom of the pot, and it will make your chili damn good. Put the lid on and let that cook down for around 15 or 20 minutes. Stir it during commercial breaks.

6. Tomatoes, Beans, and Bay

Add in your tomatoes, beans, and a bay leaf or two for your grandpa to find in his bowl. Stir it in, turn it down, and let it sit. Cook this for at least half an hour (more is better) on low heat. Stir it during commercial breaks, or when you get spawn-camped. I like to leave the lid cracked open so the steam can escape and the chili can reduce. The longer this cooks, the more liquid is released, and the better it tastes. What you’re eventually left with is a nice, thick chili with a smoky, deep flavor from the chipotle and chocolate – with a little spice kick from the cinnamon you won’t even consciously notice but will definitely appreciate.

7. Eat Dat Chili

Serve it up with some crackers, sour cream, and sharp cheddar. Eat like a king for a week.

Favorites of Favorites

2015-02-25T15:12:00.001-08:00

I was trying to think of my favorite episode of my favorite TV show, and I couldn’t even decide what my favorite show was, much less my favorite episode. It has occurred to me that I like too many things. I can’t help it; I am constantly finding myself liking pretty much anything and everything. Food, movies, activities, music – I can usually enjoy whatever’s in front of me.

Except bananas. Super gross, people. Get over yourselves.

Here is a list of shows I like, with a little bit about my favorite episode(s) from each one.

FRIENDS
Friends is a great show. I think a lot of people who don’t like Friends (or worse, nothing Friends) probably didn’t spend a large portion of their childhood watching it. We had the whole set on DVD, and I may have spent a Winter break or two marathoning it.

My all-time favorite episode of Friends has to be the one with Pheobe’s wedding. When I was a kid, I thought it was awesome. They got married outside! In the snow! And there were steel drums, which I was kind of obsessed with for a while. Besides, Paul Rudd plays one of the best recurring characters on the show – Crap Bag.

SCRUBS
I was big into Scrubs for a while, but it kind of became a poster boy for shows that gasp on long after their expiration date – even though the last season was pretty great (but let’s be honest, it was a different show).

I have a tie for what were, I think, the best moments in Scrubs – the episode(s) dealing with Brendan Frasier’s character dying, and the episodes dealing with Dr. Cox losing several patients to Rabies-infested organ transplants. Scrubs was such a campy show much of the time, so the serious or sad episodes really stood out and allowed those characters to show emotions not often seen from that style of comedy.

MR. SHOW
I will admit, I have not seen all or much of Mr. Show. But I have seen a few episodes, and my hands-down favorite is still the first one I ever saw – Season 1, Episode 2. Bits of it can drag – but I think you get that with most sketch shows. This episode is my favorite because it contains most of my favorite Mr. Show moments – Senator Tankerbell, “The Joke” musical, and that last Pit-Pat commercial is great. All it needs is F.F. Woodycooks!

PARKS AND RECREATION
It is extremely difficult to choose my favorite Parks & Rec episode – partly because the storylines often last for several episodes, but mostly because the show is so great that specific moments don’t often stand out as being greater than any others.

But I think I would pick Season 3, Episode 16 – Lil’ Sebastian. An overall excellent episode, it’s nudged over the line by this amazing song. Listen to it. Get it stuck in your head.

(If anything, watch this clip of the cast singing the song just to see Gjlarry Gergich and April Ludgate totes making out.)

COMMUNITY
First, Community was a great show with an aimless last season. It felt like they didn’t really know what to do with it after the main characters graduated. But they had to graduate sometime right? It was weird.

But there were some seriously excellent single episodes that I enjoyed more than the rest. The season-finale paintball spoofisodes were always a lot of fun.

My favorite episode, however, is “Digital Estate Planning” – episode 20 from season 3. The cast members are put into a video game to help Pierce earn his inheritance. Or something. Anyway, it was cool.

CUTTHROAT KITCHEN
Okay, this is not the kind of show I’m sure you would expect to find here. Alton Brown’s torture kitchen has a pretty standard format, so there’s not a huge amount of variation (apart from individual sabotages, which are usually pretty great).

But the best episode I’ve seen (and I think I’ve seen almost all of them) was a celebrity chef episode where they played for charity. It was heat three of this “Superstar Sabotage” series that lasted several episodes. This episode in particular is great just because of the final challenge. Eric Greenspan must out-lemon-bar Johnny Luzzini, one of the best pastry chefs in the country.

I don’t want to spoil it, but Eric starts the round with all $25,000. Johnny has $100. You can see how this turns out. Watch it to find out for sure.

THE WALKING DEAD
The Walking Dead is a crazy good show. Based on the Walking Dead comics (which are also crazy good), it follows a group of survivors in a zombie-apocalyptic world.

I won’t go into too much detail, mainly because I don’t want to. There are too many great episodes to choose from, so I will just name my favorite storyline. I love what we see as we follow The Governor, one of the deadliest characters we meet in the show, after his failed first attempt at taking over the prison, our main characters’ stronghold (for a while).

It’s an excellent bit of character development (warning: link contains graphic content from the show) which ultimately ends in more tragedy – deviating as the show often does from the comics, while still fulfilling in some way those major plot points the readers expect from the show.

Side note, the show version of the governor is a much more nuanced and imposing character than the comic version, who didn’t last long at all. The casting choice of the 6’3” David Morrissey to play the role was smart, as his height alone makes him an authority figure. If you don’t watch The Walking Dead or read the comics, none of this will make sense, but maybe it will pique your interest. Great bit of storytelling.

ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT, MODERN FAMILY, PEEP SHOW
These are some of my all-time favorite shows, but I can’t name a favorite episode. The storylines of Arrested Development and Modern Family often span multiple episodes or even seasons, making it impossible for me to pick a favorite. I have favorite moments from certain episodes, but as far as entire episodes go, I just can’t do it. Similarly for Peep Show – which is crammed full of hilarious moments and lines – I can’t pick out one episode that stands above the rest. These shows are just too all-around good for me to choose.

So there you have it. Some of the favorites from my favorites. Turned out way longer than I expected, but that’s the way it goes sometimes. Thanks for reading!

Forgotten Corners

2015-02-24T18:15:00.001-08:00

I had a music blog for a while. It was a Tumblr. I think I started it as just a way to share specific songs I liked with people, but it turned into kind of a song review project. In my recollection, it did not last long – but apparently it lasted almost exactly two years – from April 2010 to April 2012, after which I just stopped posting.

I probably would have kept it going, but it didn’t get much traction – there are a lot of zero play posts. And to be fair, I wasn’t a very active Tumblr user.

Still, it’s fun to go back and look at what I wrote. There are these forgotten corners – little pockets of the internet where I’ve left my mark. It’s exciting and a little sad to discover them. I had an MSN Live Space for a while, but I think that’s all gone. I wonder if my Myspace is still there, but I have forgotten my username (is Myspace even still a thing?).

It’s probably how I’ll feel in ten years when I find this blog. (Zing.)

Anyway – check it out if you have the inclination. tmarksthemusic.tumblr.com

Going Without

2015-02-16T19:50:00.001-08:00

I decided to go a week without mobile games. My phone would be used solely for communication and the internet – yes, I am aware that that still constitutes a huge timesuck, and no I don’t care. It’s my thing I can do what I want.

DAY ONE – 2/15/15

Day one was pretty easy. We were driving pretty much all day (traveling back from WI visiting family). I wrapped up my one loose end – leaving my Clash of Clans clan (Purdue Alumni – Boiler Up!) so my lack of participation wouldn’t harm our war performance – and began my dry week. Not surprisingly, there was not a lot of temptation to use my phone for games during the 8 hours of traveling (Left WI at 11 am Lafayette time, arrived home at 7 pm). We finished up the night with some board games with friends – another welcome distraction from my lack of distraction.

DAY TWO – 2/16/15

Today was a little harder. I did not turn off my app notifications, so my phone was going off every hour or so with a game asking me to come play. Here is a list of the games currently installed on my phone:

Clash of Clans
Trivia Crack
Crossy Road (kind of an updated Frogger)
Androminion (Dominion for Android)
Spaceteam (needs to be played in a group anyway)
Bike Race
Chess Time
Flappy Bird (the one and only)

I don’t play all of them every day – but I do spend an awful lot of time playing games and not paying attention to what is happening around me. Clash of Clans is especially time consuming. Trivia Crack, Space Team, Bike Race, and Chess Time are at least games played with people I know in real life.

Many of these games are also games I play on my tablet – which is also off limits for the week. So today, I kept myself busy with a haircut, brocery shopping (grocery shopping with your bros) with my son, and a trip to the mall.

DAY THREE – 2/17/15

Had to add the Stumbleupon app to the list of things I’m not allowed to use for the week. If you're not sure what it is, and you like your free time, don't look it up.

DAY FOUR – 2/18/15

Wednesday wasn't too bad. I had after school responsibilities, and then after dinner and some kid time, I went to improv practice - so I didn't have too much down time. Still, I am being bombarded with the game notifications I didn't think to turn off when I started this. Clash of Clans in particular is a bad one. Other games may notify me when it's my turn, or when a game has expired because of my absence - but CoC just keeps saying "Come back! We miss you!" I think we need to see other people, Clash.

DAY FIVE - 2/19/15

I had to stay after school again today to coach my math team, so that kept me busy for a little bit. When I got home, I made pork chops with asparagus and cornbread for dinner. It was pretty tasty. I am noticing that, while I am dealing with not playing the games fine (no withdrawals or anything), I’m still using my phone just as much. Facebook, Twitter, email, etc. are all keeping my attention just as much.

DAY SIX - 2/20/15

Friday. Friday! I had an improv show at 8 pm (call time at 6), so I didn’t have very much time at home. Spent most of it hanging out with my kid, making dinner, then getting ready to go.

DAY SEVEN – 2/21/15

I kept busy on the last day. We took the kid to a swimming lesson in the morning, then I played racquetball with friends around eleven. We cleaned the house a bit, then had friends over for games (more like an interminable round of Monopoly) later in the evening. Again, there was plenty of phone use. Just had to ignore the game notifications.

DAY EIGHT – SUNDAY 2/22/15 – AND FINAL REFLECTIONS

At last, the day came when I could once again… forget about the whole thing and not realize I could play games again until Sunday afternoon. Ah well. I guess it didn’t have that much of an impact.

I learned that I am probably going to use my phone for entertainment whether I can play games or not – this may or may not be a bad thing. I see a lot of people go on technology-free binges, staying off all electronics for an appreciable amount of time to glorious effect. This week was not one of those. But there have been a few repercussions:

I am currently locked out of my clan in Clash of Clans. They are set to “closed” status and I have no way of contacting them. So I have no choice but to check in and ping myself against their doors every so often in hopes of getting in.
I have lost/forfeited about ten games in trivia crack due to inactivity, making me the laughingstock of my small Facebook friend circle. What a dunce.
Friends are passing me up in Crossy Road scores and number of unlocked characters. Again, laughingstock.

Despite the obvious negative outcomes of this experiment, I am actually none the worse for wear. I am noticing a slight freedom, however. I used to check my social games (the three above most often) several times a day – this was spurred on by the almost constant barrage of notifications I would receive from those games, reminding me to play. I could go on about the ramifications this has for society as a whole, but the thought of doing that makes me kind of tired. All I will say is that it’s kind of nice to force the realization that none of those things actually matter. I don’t need to worry about checking my Trivia games before 48 hours pass or I lose the game – because it’s just a game, and I can start a new one. None of it is real.

Thanks for reading! Post over. Now to play some Clash.

Cats and (Briefly) College

2015-02-10T18:55:00.001-08:00

I think I can say I’m a cat person. I’m also a dog person. I don’t discriminate. But this post is about cats. Mostly one, but there are others in there.

When I was in the fifth grade, I asked for a cat for my birthday. (I am pretty sure it was the fifth grade. It could have been the fourth grade. I am almost positive it wasn’t the third or sixth grade.) I got two! Some family friends had just had some kittens in their barn, so we took two of them. We named them Charlotte and Rosie. They were purdy cute.

Charlotte. Rosie.

I remember waking up with them curled up on my face, or crammed up against me under the covers. They slept with me when I was sick on the couch. Charlotte used to sit on the back of my dad’s recliner and watch our fish tank (pictured). And then they got fleas.

Cats get fleas. It happens a lot. But it affected Rosie a little differently than it affected Charlotte. She developed a weird skin rash and started licking the fur and skin off her belly. She started laying in the litter box for hours (we think because it felt good on her skin). We finally had to take her to the vet to be put down. It was pretty sad. But to be honest, I was a kid and she grossed me out.

We still had Charlotte though! And as a stupid kid, I would alternate between being really nice to her, and tormenting her. She spent a lot of time in the basement, sitting on the rafters in the last room. We would chase her down with pool noodles whenever we wanted to play with her. I think this was around the time she started to become less social. She would scurry across rooms, hurrying from my room upstairs, to her litter box in the basement, to her food in the laundry room. I don’t think she felt comfortable in open spaces – partly I am sure because of us chasing her around, and partly because she was terrified of my dad. I have no idea why. I think he had loud footsteps.

It was around this time – high school – that we brought Charlie into the house. Charlie was basically a stray. One of our neighbor’s many street cats had kittens. She moved the first one to a new place after they were a few weeks old, went back for Charlie, and forgot where she was going. We watched her walk around the backyard – Charlie dangling from her mouth – looking for that other kitten. So my mom decided he would be safer inside with us. (we found a few dead kittens scattered around the yard that summer. She was not a clever cat.)

Well, Charlotte took one look at this tiny yellow kitten, and nope’d right out of there. Hissed right in his face and walked into my bedroom. The thing was, Charlie loved spending time in my room. As he grew (and he grew a lot), he soon dwarfed Charlotte in size. Charlotte weighed about 7 pounds at this time. Charlie grew to about 20. So there were many nights that I was woken up by those two cats freaking out on my bed. Charlie would sleep by my feet and Charlotte would sleep up by my head – and they would often just sit and shriek at each other, then fling themselves around the room. It was super annoying.

But then Charlie became an outside cat – he was, after all, basically a stray, and never really got the hang of a litter box. He never really fit inside all that well. Plus he peed by all the doors all the time. So he went back outside – but he stayed in the yard. He was decidedly ours.

When I went to college, Charlotte stayed behind. No pets in the dorms. Apparently she just sat on the edge of my bed until I came home, months later. My parents had to move her food, water, and litter box into my room. There was basically a small quilt of cat fur on the foot-end of my bed which marked where she spent her time. She was a sad panda.

I started dating Mary early February of my sophomore year at Purdue. The next school year, my mom called me and told me that I should probably take my cat. My apartment at the time didn’t allow pets, but Mary’s did! So Charlotte went to live with Mary and her roommate. She acclimated pretty well to college life, and they were nice enough to keep her litter box in their living room. Or in their apartment at all. It’s not the nicest thing to keep in an apartment, especially in a living room. It’s just a box of poo.

Anyway, after we graduated, I went to live in the apartment above Mary’s parents’ garage for the summer, because we were getting married. Charlotte came with me. We thought we’d lost her while unpacking, but it turns out she had somehow squeezed herself through a 1-inch gap and was hiding underneath the washing machine. She came screaming out the first time I turned it on. We lived in that mini-house together for about three months, until Mary and I landed our teaching jobs in Lafayette.

So we all moved to Lafayette! We found an apartment right downtown, and Charlotte of course came with us. This time her litter box was right by the front door, but it was a hallway and when the door opened it was kind of behind it – so it was all good. It was a nice apartment, and Charlotte seemed very happy. She was starting to open up – actually coming into the living room when people were around! Though she did tend to keep to the top of the couch.

In the spring of 2010, we decided to buy a house. There was a tax credit up for grabs, and savings be damned! Charlotte came with, and I can honestly say she might be the happiest she’s ever been. For the first few weeks after moving, we’d find her hiding under the covers of our bed – just a small lump in the middle. Slowly, she adjusted to her new surroundings. I was able to pick her up and hold her for an actual amount of time for the first time in my entire life (and hers!). She started sitting on my lap. She started sitting on Mary’s lap. She sat on a friend’s lap last week! She is a changed animal. Maybe she is getting old (17 years is, I suppose, a lot for a cat).

But if we’re going to talk about cats, we have to talk some more about Charlie. Remember Charlie? The cat we brought in from the mean streets of Clayton, Indiana? Well, a couple of years after buying our house, my parents divorced and sold their house – and the yard went with it. As my mom was living in an apartment that didn’t allow pets, Charlie came to live with us. And we promptly lost him, because we didn’t know how to keep a cat from leaving the yard to find his actual home. Fortunately, I had put a collar on him before leaving him in the yard, and 8 days after he disappeared I received a phone call from someone who lived about 5 blocks away. Charlie was found! And after a night in the garage, he seemed content to stay.

Charlie was with us for a solid two years, during which he came into the house twice. On one of those visits, Charlotte decided to corner him in the bathroom and start a fight. Five pounds vs. twenty. Charlie went back outside, and Charlotte went to the vet to get the hole in her stomach stitched up. Could have been worse I suppose.

In May of 2013 he developed some pneumonia after being under anesthesia for a haircut (a yearly necessity – his hair developed terribly mats in the winter). Faced with thousands of dollars in medical bills, we were forced to put him down. He sat right between us when they did it – all shaved and sad looking. It broke me down - I sobbed all night. I didn’t think it would affect me so much – but he was something special. He was one of the nicest, biggest cats I have ever met. But hey – as my mom said, he had two extra years with us that he probably wouldn’t have gotten otherwise.

So that’s my cat history. I did leave out the cat who walked into our house in Florida during a rainstorm and never left (we named him Cat), but if we’re being honest, I barely remember that cat. He did used to sleep with me in Florida, and he did ruin some brown shag carpet after we moved to Indiana. Good times.

Anyway, nowadays Charlotte has to compete with our kid – but to tell the truth, she seems to enjoy his torture. She likes to be around him, even if sometimes he gets a really tight grip on her tail or a chunk of skin. She is getting old (like I said, 17!), but I think she’s still got several good years to go.

Da Way It Is

2015-02-07T04:47:00.001-08:00

I am not really sure what the point of having this blog is anymore. I like having it, but I'm not delusional. I know it's nothing anyone will read. So what's the point?

I do all of my "life chronicling" in other places. Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, etc. have all become microblogs themselves - at least enough so that anyone who wants to know anything about me already does.

So I guess this is for everything else. The odd writing project, recipe, or "thing I have nowhere else to put". It feels like a hiding place almost. Like a box on the street that anyone could look into, but why would they? It's just one box of a big pile, which is actually kind of nice.

But anything I actually want to share? That goes on Facebook. Where the people are.

An Exception to the Rule.

2015-01-23T18:27:00.001-08:00

Regular (hah!) readers of my blog will notice a lack of activity from November 2012 until nowish (January 2015). Pretty big gap. In that time I switched schools, earned my Masters degree, and became a father. It was pretty busy – but full of bloggable moments. So why the dry spell?

I generally don’t blog about my everyday life. I tried it once, and I couldn’t keep it up. There is something so tedious about rehashing what happened to me during the day that I end up quitting after one or two. I tried to keep a journal in high school – and a week later, threw it away. I can’t do it.

So why have a blog? It’s a kind of safety net, I guess. I like that it’s there. I like knowing that if I ever wanted to blog about something, I could. This is also why I don’t pay for a custom URL – sparsely-updated safety nets don’t deserve having money thrown at them.

Of course not enjoying writing about my everyday life means I have to come up with other things to blog about. Well, when I started this blog way back in September 2013 (mostly because I wanted a new email and hadn’t considered the possibility that deleting my old one rather than just sort of deactivating it would eliminate my access to everything liked to that email account – like my old blog, for example), I promised to “focus more on cooking and projects, and less on stupid posts about my life that no one really cares about anyway.”

Wise words.

So the things I usually feel like blogging about are honestly the types of things I would read about. I often search online for recipes – I hardly use cookbooks anymore since there is so much online. And every so often when I do write something creatively, it usually winds up on here – especially when it was written specifically for this blog (thanks 24HBD). I like to write about things I create, because it’s a break from the usual for me. It’s like, hey – I did a thing, so look at the thing I did!

The focus of this blog has widened a bit, I would say. It’s not all recipes and projects anymore – I started (and then took a 2.5 year break from) posting academic papers from college that I really enjoyed writing/re-reading. The kinds of things I don’t want to just drop in a folder and forget – I like to relive them, and then force my friends and family to live them as well.

Really, looking back through all the posts on this blog I can see that they are all a) recipes, b) building projects, c) creative projects (improv included!), or d) photography stuff. There are a few posts slipped in there about vacations and opinions and whatever, but most of what I post seems to be stuff I make.

Except for this post. Aren’t you glad you read it?

The Downfall of the Family Callahan

2015-01-21T07:33:00.001-08:00

Here you go, Koscielny. I wrote you a dang sestina. I used a random word generator to choose my six words, which are:

A) suspicion

B) tea

C) burying

D) bottom

E) estate

F) insisting

So here you go. Years late, and generally unintelligible, because sestinas are awkward and horrible. Hope you're happy.

The Downfall of the Family Callahan

Among the family grew a great suspicion.

Sideways glances whilst sipping at their tea.

Seen silhouetted by moonlight, burying

Objects unknown on cliff top from bottom

Was assumed to be among their own estate.

(Though innocence was all they were insisting.)

Interesting to note the insisting

Parties, mostly first to cast suspicion,

Were family leaders of the fine estate.

A family fortune made by selling tea

Greedily squandered from top to bottom

While arguing on who they would be burying.

Quickly, a note on who was burying

Family treasures, they would be insisting

Once great wonders rotting in the bottom

Of pits dug, while avoiding suspicion,

By not the owners of Callahan Tea,

But by ones taking care of the estate.

For all while upkeeping the estate

Despite the family’s attempts at burying

The help from public eye, they grew the tea

And cleaned the land. So through their insisting

Of effort they were giving, suspicion

Landed among the top, not the bottom.

Now the treasure rotting in the bottom

Of pits on cliff-top grounds of the estate,

Needed to be moved without suspicion,

So night found them undoing the burying

Already undertaken while insisting

That fortunes lie in gold, not in tea.

The family in the morning found the tea

untended, and searching the cliff bottom

found the wreckage of the help. Insisting

upon finding the wealth of their estate

They looted the bodies before burying

Finding nothing confirmed their old suspicions.

For all the suspicions of the family of Callahan Tea,

Their wealth still went out to sea, burying itself on the bottom.

But for the bribes of a rival estate, good fortune would be all they were insisting.

Geology Yeeeaaaaaaah

2012-11-20T13:09:00.001-08:00

As promised, I will now regale you (or really, just post for your reading enjoyment) with my EAS 111 (Geology) report on graphite. I am pretty sure this is also an extra credit assignment, because reading through it, there is no way a University would accept this with anything better than a C, and I’m pretty sure I aced this class.

Or maybe it was a real assignment, and I was just counting on my inexhaustible supply of charm and wit to get me through. Yeah. That’s probably it.

Graphite – It’s Not Lead!
But it is, a little bit.
Well, Sort of.
Just Read.

Tim Franklin

Remember in the olden days of elementary school, when you were probably “accidentally” stabbed in the hand (or other extremity) with a (probably sharpened) No. 2 Dixon Ticonderoga pencil? And you worried for days and days that you would get Lead Poisoning? Well, the good news is that piece of pencil lead still imbedded in your palm (or ear) won’t give you lead poisoning. Of course, having a piece of graphite stuck in your hand probably isn’t the best of ideas, either. That’s right. Graphite – it’s not lead, and it probably will never be.

So why call it lead? Why not call it “pencil graphite”? Well, according to www.pencils.com, the name comes from the time when people would find clumps of graphite on the roots of trees, and they called it names like “plumbago” and “Blacklead”. I have no idea how they got “Lead” from “plumbago”, though. It is a mystery, it is a mystery.

The “lead” in your pencil isn’t actually a chunk of graphite chiseled into a round shape, however. It is actually a mixture of graphite and clay. The clay is added to make the “lead” harder, stronger, and darker. Basically, the process involves pulverizing the graphite into a powder, and then mixing it with clay and water to make a paste. The paste is then dried and shaped into slim cylinders. These are sandwiched in between two sections of grooved wood, which are glued together, cut into sections, and shaped into pencils, erasers optional. It’s actually a very interesting process. Early pencils were just pieces of graphite wrapped in string. The problem with this was that graphite crumbles easily, so these early writing tools didn’t last long. The holders advanced to wood, and experiments with clay were made, and the modern marvel called a Pencil was formed.

Graphite can be found all over the world. There once was a significant source near Ticonderoga, New York (hence the name of the stabby-pencil of your youth), but it has since shut down. China is currently the leading producer of graphite, and other countries include Sri Lanka, Brazil, and even Canada. An interesting tidbit about this wonder mineral is that it is a form of carbon. Another form of carbon is diamond, which, as we all know, is an extremely hard mineral. It’s a good thing graphite isn’t, because we’d all have to go around burning wood to write with charcoal, and no one wants to burn wood. No one.

Now, the pencil is an integral part of human society. How many times have you ransacked the drawers of your house looking for a pencil? Without pencils, we’d have to fill out a bubble exam sheet with pen, and then the computers wouldn’t be able to read them! Without pencils, we would be very hard pressed to do everything perfectly the first time, because everyone knows you can’t erase pen. (Unless you buy those “erasable pens”, which aren’t erasable, and which suck anyway.) And everyone knows that mistakes are important learning experiences in life, and we must all learn from them. So without pencils, we would never learn.

Graphite is also used as a lubricant in places where liquid lubricants can’t go, like places of extreme heat, etc. Who knew? I didn’t.

Okay, I did. But I might not have, and that makes all the difference.

In this paragraph, I shall try to stall for time and space, as my report on the wonder material known as graphite is lacking in length, and length, being one of the requirements of this paper, is very important. Very important indeed.

Speaking of graphite, it is a very good conductor of electricity, which is sort of odd because it is a non-metal. This probably has something to do with electrons. I could research this further, but I have come under a sudden attack of Last-Semester-itis, and it is seriously hampering my schooling ability.

In conclusion to this very uninformative, yet hopefully amusing paper, it is clear that graphite is a very important mineral to our society. Writing is an integral part of any society, and graphite was an enormous help in that area. Once again, without pencils, all of society could come crashing to a halt. And halts are bad news for people who like good news.

Well. Someone was listening to Modest Mouse when he wrote this. And look at all those parentheticals! Man, this is some high-powered writing. And did you see that in-text citation? How totally correctly done was that? What? You can’t just put a URL in a paper and call it a day? The A+++ I got on this paper says otherwise. You can’t tell, but this paper was double spaced, and used Arial 12.5 font. Oh yeah. Gotta sneak that extra .5 in. Don’t you know anything about college?

Geology Whaaaaat

2012-11-19T21:31:00.001-08:00

In the spring of 2006, which would have been the second half of my freshman year at Purdue, I took a Geology class (EAS 111), because I needed a lab science. I’m not sure if I was aware of it at the time or not, but it had a 3 hour lab attached to it. A lot of the instructors who ran these labs were aware of how painfully long that is, and usually let out early.

Not my guy.

I think I had the Associate Professor Deanish President-Elect Acting Chancellor in charge of EAS labs, because he never let out early. In fact, he started every lab by reteaching what had been presented in the lecture that week.

But that’s okay, because this guy was awesome at Geology. He knew everything. Probably better than the lecture professor did – and he was hands on.

Anyway, he gave us an extra credit assignment – a self-guided field trip around Purdue’s campus to find and identify geological wonders. I recently found my submission for this assignment, which I received full points for. Not because I was correct in my identifications (which I am pretty sure I was, for the most part, not), but because my paper was (in his words) “the best thing he’d ever read”. He also told me that I would most certainly get an A in his lab regardless of how correctly I identified everything as long as I kept making him giggle the way my extra credit assignment did.

So now, I present to you, my submission for EAS 111’s self-guided geology field trip.

Wouldn’t It Be Gneiss?
A Geology Field Trip

EAS 111
Tim Franklin
March 8, 2006

Rock one seems to be granitic in composition. It is light colored, with small amounts of pink, suggesting the presence of quartz or K feldspar. It has a medium grain size, with the majority of the grains moving in the same direction. I would just call it granite, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it’s some type of gneiss.

Rock two was all kinds of weird lookin’, I am not gonna lie. It was dark, with a fairly uniform grain size. There were lighter colored “veins” criss-crossing the entire thing. Unfortunately, I haven’t the slightest idea what it is. The first time I looked at it, I thought it might be a sedimentary rock with large pieces cemented to each other, but after a closer examination, I think it’s some sort of metamorphic rock.

Rock number three was like some kind of prehistoric beast, sitting in its ring of trees waiting to jump on some poor kid’s compact car. I noted foliation, and that it was a dark stone, with very small crystals. For some reason, I was under the impression that it was basaltic in nature. I would say it is metamorphic, and an example of a hornfel or an amphibolite.

At first, I thought that the steps were stop number four. Then I took a better look at the paper. Ahh, the pillars. They are definitely a limestone (sedimentary), and though I’m leaning towards oolitic, I could be wrong. They have a light, sandy color.

As I approached rock number five, I said to myself “That looks like a sandstone.” Of course, I had to go sit and play on it before I was absolutely sure, but it is definitely a sandstone. It has a light, tannish color, and very small particles. I would classify it as an arkose sandstone.

I have rock number six marked as “igneous, possible metamorphic”. That seems to be the theme in my observations. It has whitish gray and black particles, and a “salt and pepper” look. The crystals are fairly small. I identify it as diorite.

I noticed some distinct foliation on rock number seven, and from basic observations I determined it to be a granitic gneiss. The pinkish color is consistent with K feldspar or quartz, suggesting granite. I also enjoyed the many quotes dotting the landscape around rock number seven. If it isn’t a philosophical rock, it should be.

I stood in the Stewart Mural Room for about ten minutes until I realized the rock I was to be looking for was probably the room itself, in other words, the marble walls. It’s very good looking white marble, and is a metamorphic rock coming from limestone. I wish my mural room was made out of marble. I also very dutifully noted the dark granite steps leading up to the doors to the Stewart Center. They were very nice. I even took a picture, but I keep that under my pillow.

The rock opposite Stone Hall appears to be igneous, with some quartz present – fairly large crystal size. It is a dark stone, crossed with white and pink “ropes”. It’s also very old, and I’m assuming it hasn’t changed much since 1887. There’s a chance the dark sections are gabbro, but I’m not holding out.

Stop number 10 was a little tricky to find, but I was looking in the wrong place. I did find it though, and have it marked as a clastic sedimentary rock with a large (1–4 in.) particle size. The particles are angular, and are held together by a dark cement. From this, it appears to be a breccia, and it also looks like the sediments didn’t get very far before they cemented into place. I wonder how they feel about that.

The fountain in Founder’s Park is made of the metamorphic rock marble. It’s just as nice as the marble in the Mural Room, but it’s darker, with more pink, black, and green, although the green may be due to water damage. It reminds me of my kitchen countertops, only more round and taller.

Okay, rock number twelve was in the middle of a cluster of thornbushes. I got a chuckle. I mean, if I were designing a field trip / scavenger hunt, I would make it as hard as possible. Anyway, the definite foliation suggests a metamorphic rock, with a fairly small crystal size. The colors range from reddish orange to black. SO I would call it a staurolite-quartz-garnet schist, but that’s just me, and me’s wrong a lot. In other words, I don’t know about this one.

Rock thirteen is a metamorphic rock with definite layers that curve around. It looks like there is some quartz present, along with some K feldspar. The crystals range from small to fairly large in size. It could be a granitic gneiss. Or it could be a Quartz-K-feldspar schist. Some scholars maintain that the actual identity of this rock has been lost forever. Who am I to argue with that?

Rock fourteen was pinkish, with thick layers of large crystals on layers of smaller ones. It probably contained a lot of K Feldspar and quartz ( I seem to see them everywhere.) The layering suggests to me a metamorphic rock. I would say that this rock is a gneiss, and a guartz-feldspar one at that. It seems to be a common thing to call a rock when you don’t know what it is.

Here it is. The last rock on this roller coaster of discovery, joy, frustration, and confusion. At least I did it when it wasn’t raining. This rock is yet another metamorphic rock, ascertained by the definite (definite, mind you, I wrote it down) foliation. I saw “lots of darker minerals” and some pink and white hues. Oh, and there was some green as well. Yet again, I’m going to have to go with some sort of gneiss with this one, but I think this time I might be right about it. And wouldn’t you know it, I’m going to say granitic gneiss due to the fact that, gosh-darned it, it looks so much like a granite that had all the colors separated and smashed into separate layers by extreme pressure and heat. Or something like that.

Well, I enjoyed going on this field trip. Hopefully, you enjoyed reading about it as much as I enjoyed writing it and hitting the “text-wrap” button on the picture toolbar every few minutes. Rock on!

(groans)

So there you have it. Apparently, I am an idiot. Next time, I’ll share with you the report I did on graphite!

Curse at the Windstorms

2012-10-30T19:50:00.001-07:00

Barenaked Ladies has always been one of my favorite bands (if not my absolute favorite). I think the first CD I ever bought was Stunt, and the rest of the collection soon followed. Catchy tunes, thoughtful lyrics, and talented musicians keep them going. Though they are probably best known for being a colorful, oddball, and quirky band, my favorite songs have always been their most poignant. These songs, with lyrics so painful, and upward swells so big and empty it’s hard not to get lost, have stayed with me, and bring me to the brink every time. It kills me that Steven Page has left the band, and I never got to see them all together in concert. I hear they were amazing.

Take a listen. Embrace your melancholy. These are songs for sad.

“War on Drugs” from Everything to Everyone
Favorite Lyric: “Won’t it be dull when we rid ourselves of all these demons haunting us, to keep us company? Won’t it be odd to be happy like we always thought we’re supposed to feel, but never seem to be?”
Also:
”When the very fear that makes you want to die is just the same as what keeps you alive, it’s way more trouble than some suicide is worth.”

“Wrap Your Arms Around Me” from Gordon
Favorite Lyric: “I regret every time I raised my voice, and it wouldn’t be that bright of me to say I had no choice. I can kiss your eyes, your hair, your neck, until we forget.”

“When I Fall” from Born On A Pirate Ship
Favorite Lyric: “Look straight in the mirror – watch it come clearer. I look like a painter, behind all the grease. But painting’s creating, and I’m just erasing. A crystal-clear canvas is my masterpiece.”

“Break Your Heart” from Born On A Pirate Ship
Favorite Lyric: “What’d you think that I was gonna do, try to make you love me as much as I love you? How could you be so low?”

“Call and Answer” from Stunt
Favorite Lyric: “You think I only think about you when we’re both in the same room. I’m only here to witness the remains of love exhumed.”

“Am I The Only One” from Maybe You Should Drive
Favorite Lyric: “And who do you think I am? Who do you think I’ll be without you?”

“You Run Away” from All In Good Time
Favorite Lyric: “I tried, but you tried harder. I lied, but you lied smarter. You made me guess, who was it? I did my best, but it wasn’t enough.”

I could keep going. BNL has so many good songs, it’s hard to stop. But I will. Right now.

Chili Where My Mouth Is

2012-10-20T20:15:00.001-07:00

I am kind of a braggart when it comes to my chili. I think it’s the best chili. Whenever I eat anyone else’s chili, I am always all like “This chili is not as good as the chili I would have made.” Especially if there is macaroni in it. Or other pasta. Don’t do that. Cincinnati is wrong.

Anyway, on Friday (October 19), for the first time in my life, I decided to put my chili where my mouth is – I entered into a chili cook-off hosted by LaLa Gallery, an art gallery in downtown Lafayette. It was a little nerve-wracking because in addition to normal people like me, there were businesses which had chilis entered into the competition. The Black Sparrow and D.T. Kirby’s had chilis entered, and I am pretty sure that the School House of Chili also did, but I am not sure on that one. The Sparrow and Kirby’s are both bar/restaurants in Lafayette that have great food, so I was pretty nervous about my chances.

Anyway, on Thursday I made my chili. Same as always. Nothing special about it – just added a little more spice to amp it up a little bit. I have a container full of assorted dried chili peppers from the garden we used to have in Clayton. They will soon run out, and I don’t know what I will do. For now, though, I grind them up with a coffee grinder and add them to things. Super good.

Powdered pain. Crucial.

On Friday, I took my chili to LaLa around 5:15. The competition started at 6, so I hung out with Mary and Mike for a while at Kirby’s to kill some time. Also to scope out the competition and size up Don Kirby. Get some inside info. Things like that. You know. Don said his chili only got over there around 6:30, so he had some ground to make up. We headed back to LaLa around 6:50 or so – easy, since Kirby’s is right next door. Upon entering, I quickly found out two things. The first was that people were enjoying my chili – the first thing I heard was someone saying “Number 5 was my favorite, put that down”. Number 5 turned out to be mine, so that felt pretty good. The second thing I found out was that my crock pot was acting up, so my chili was barely warm. So, not the best of starts.

Sampling the 9 chilis available, I decided the 4 at my table were my favorites. They included mine, the two chilis from Kirby’s and the Sparrow, and a pulled pork chili which had a nice barbecue flavor, but was pretty greasy.

The chili from Kirby’s (which I only found out was Kirby’s because someone said it was the one that got there late) was good. It was thick, which I like. It had an interesting base, with not as much tomato flavor as mine. It was similar to the chili he puts on his hot dogs, which I love.

The chili from the owner of the Sparrow was kind of strange. He was there, and I commented on it. He said he just kind of made it up as he went. It had a very strong cumin/thyme flavor, which turned some people off, but made me go back for more. It didn’t seem to have any tomato in it. It was mainly beans, chickpeas, and diced chicken. Pretty tasty, but not a traditional chili.

My chili was probably the spiciest in the room. I’ll link to the recipe at the bottom of this post.

The other chilis in the room varied in their type and flavor. There was a white chicken chili, but it was too cheesy – more like a cheese soup. Tasted good though. There was also a vegan pumpkin chili, which wasn’t to my particular tastes, but I give it points for originality. Overall, we were there for about an hour. I had a really good time. I definitely want to do it again.

The pulled pork chili ended up winning. It did taste very good – but it was too greasy for me. Angela, the owner of LaLa, told me I earned the second-most number of votes. Go second place! No prize for it though. I feel good about it – my chili is pretty classic as far as chili goes. Tomatoes, meat, beans, and chili pepper. Recipe and lots of talking about it after the break.

Yes. This.

Okay, so my chili is the best. Let me tell you about it. (I already have, probably.) That link is to a recipe that is slightly out of date, but is for the most part the same as what I’m about to tell you. Redundancy go!

I start with a really hot cast iron pot. Get it hot. Throw some olive oil in there. Yeah. Smells good.

Now toss in a diced onion and a diced green pepper. Also some diced jalapeños. Because spice. Let that cook for about ten minutes. Mix it around. Let it get translucent.

Make a hole in the middle of all that goodness in there. Drop in your meat – I like to use about two pounds of lean white turkey – no fat to drain that way. Mix it around, and cover. Leave it covered for a while. Check it every once in a while, keep mixing it up, until all the meat is cooked. White turkey turns white when it’s cooked. it’s weird. You’ll have to get used to it.

(Throughout this whole process, keep adding some spices and things. Mix it in with the meat and stuff. Salt and pepper and whatever else you like. Yannow.)

Once the meat is cooked, add diced tomatoes, stewed tomatoes, tomato sauce, and a very small amount of tomato paste. It comes in a small can – one of those is fine. Mix that up, add some spices (chili powder, ground chilis, oregano, thyme, etc.), and let it cook for a bit.

Once that’s been going for like 10 or 15 minutes, add in your beans if you like that kind of thing. I use chili beans, kidney beans, black beans, and large butter beans. I love butter beans. so good.

Let that cook for like half an hour at least. On low. Simmer it away. Stir every so often so it doesn’t burn. Add your spices to taste. Add a little bit (JUST A LITTLE BIT) of cinnamon. Let it sit. Let it mix. Let it cook in.

There you go. Serve with whatever you want – I like a little sour cream, corn bread, and cheese. But honestly, it’s good by itself.

Cast Down

2012-10-01T21:07:00.001-07:00

There is one rule, and we do not break it. The sky is clear. Thin. About to pop.

Looking up invites blindness. The sky is clear. Entire worlds move underground. The surface is pitted, scorched. Purified in white-hot light.

“Do not ascend",” they tell us. “You must not rise.” It is ingrained. It is forbidden. It is… impossible. How could we? Where would it happen? Locks on all the gates. What is a ladder?

A child is born. Already blind. The next step. Cave dwelling has its consequences.

Skin pale. Translucent. Blind? Or without capacity for sight? No difference, maybe, to him. A childhood in darkness. A life in darkness. Is that any different, they ask, than anyone else.

Staring, one day. In the center of town. Town? A pit. A huddle. A collection of souls. A town.

Staring up. Gazing at nothing. For weeks. And then? Vanished. Forgotten. A momentary curiosity.

But not completely gone. Climbing. What is a ladder? Gates unlocked after all. The sky is clear.

Staring up. Gazing at nothing. Gazing at everything. Clean cremation. Purified in white-hot light.

Ashes.

And below? “Do not ascend,” they tell us.

“You must not rise.”

A latent legend. Inspired by a song.

LOOK PEACHES

2012-10-01T15:15:00.001-07:00

About a block away from my house there is a peach tree that hangs over the sidewalk. For about two months out of the year, that section of the sidewalk is covered in peaches. Towards the end of that two month span, the sidewalk is also covered in hornets and bees and other bugs that like rotting peaches. After that, the sidewalk is clear and this graffiti means nothing. I guess that also happens beforehand.

The 1st Annual Laugh-ayette Fun-stival

2012-09-23T18:01:00.001-07:00

Once upon a time, I was part of a college improv comedy group called The Crazy Monkeys. We performed at Purdue University for the most part, but we would also travel to do improv wherever and with whomever we could. One of my favorite things to do was to perform as part of a larger festival – seeing other groups perform, and showing everyone else who were were and what we were about. Those moments; those nights – they would make up some of the fondest memories of my college comedy experience.

Succinctly summed up.

So naturally, after Ad Liberation was founded – and after steam had been picked up – my inclination was to have that festival experience again. Largely through my own pestering and self-invitation, we landed a set at Big Dog Eat Child’s 8th Super Party – unfortunately, not everyone could make it, but we combined forces with some friends and put on an awesome show.

But my hunger wasn’t sated. I did some more pestering, and Ad Liberation found ourselves in the lineup of the 2012 IU Campus Comedy Show – along with the IU groups and the Upright Citizens Brigade. UCB in particular were incredible – it’s amazing how much you can learn by just watching talented people perform. We had two sets, and I think they both went pretty well.

But I was still not satisfied!

And I was being joined in my dissatisfaction by others. Matt managed to schmooze and email-contact our way into Malignant Humor, a comedy festival at Illinois State University in Champagne-Urbana, IL. Compared to the other two nights, I don’t think we had as strong a showing, but our set was decent, and there was good comedy-watching to be had. Also, I had some really good tea (Ginger Dragon) in the ISU union building.

All this was great. Is still, I guess. But I really wanted to host my own festival. I wanted us to host our own festival. I wanted a festival to happen here. It never happened when I was in college – the closest we ever came were joint shows with local groups. I wanted improv, I wanted sketch, I wanted standup. I wanted a night of comedy –a celebration of our craft.

Planning for the “Funstival” had been bandied about since Ad Liberation was founded. We looked into different venues, at different dates, and cast out some initial invitations to gauge interest. But nothing really gained traction. A couple of years went by.

Finally, on September 15 – after two years of existence – Ad Liberation hosted our festival. The First Annual Laughayette Funstival went from 6-10:45 pm and featured eight different comedy groups and seven standup/variety acts. There was a cheesy joke competition and a free raffle. At its biggest, the audience was around 80 people (maybe a little more). At its smallest, around 30. It went 45 minutes over time. It started 15 minutes late. Last minute changes to the lineup had to be made because of travelling difficulties or miscommunications. It was awesome.

I do give myself some credit for putting this festival on. I feel I was a major driving force behind it, and I handled much of the communication and booking for the event. However, the other members of Ad Liberation came together for it in a big way. Between inviting out of town groups, designing advertisements, running the merch table, managing check-ins, running the A/V equipment, handling music, telling butt jokes, introducing acts, pulling raffle winners, and picking up a wayward troupe in a last-minute van ride, there is no way this would have been as successful a night had it not been for my friends in Ad Lib. Plus, our set was awesome. Good job, everyone. Can’t wait for next year.

The extremely profitable Festival Sticker. Photo courtesy of mah mom.

Here’s a list of participating acts in the festival:

The Expertcast (Live Podcast – The Internet)
Condiments Upon Request (Improv troupe – Indiana State University)
Jake Kryshak (Standup Comedian – Ball State University)
One Size Fits All (Improv troupe – Lafayette, IN)
Evan Ashby (Standup Comedian – Purdue University)
Abso (Improv troupe – Ball State University)
Zachary Baiel (Candidate for Mayor of Chauncey Village – [West] Lafayette, IN)
The Crazy Monkeys (Improv troupe – Purdue University)
The Ship of Fools (Improv troupe – Purdue University)
Abby Chew (Standup Comedian – Lafayette, IN)
Humor Artists (Improv troupe – Notre Dame)
Shauvon McGill (Internetman – Louisville, KY)
Ad Liberation (Improv troupe – Lafayette, IN)

D:

2012-09-13T19:03:00.001-07:00

Whoah. Let’s face it – anyone following this blog has probably given up by now. Wait, here it comes! The blog about not ever blogging! Every blog needs one. Here’s mine:

It’s been a crazy busy time for me this past year. Wrapping up my third year of teaching feels pretty good – and summer vacation is always a reason to celebrate. This summer, though, was not all picnics and sweating (but it was a lot of sweating). I worked a summer school program all through June – 2 hours a day doesn’t seem like much (oh yeah – for two hours a day), but starting at 8 am every morning at a school half an hour away does drain a man who is used to waking up at noon during the months of June, July, and much of August.

In July came GERI camp – yep, still doing that. I had a great time, blah blah blah. Same old story. Met old friends again, made some new ones.

After camp came my blissful last few weeks of summer – but wait! I applied for and accepted a job at Tecumseh Junior High School here in Lafayette. No more 1/2 hour commute for me! It also meant an extra couple of weeks before the start of school. Extra long summer, yeah! FIlled with trips to the beach (see above picture) and Dominion. So much Dominion.

Want to play Dominion?

But through all that (and through all my time currently) is online grad school. Posting and reading and more posting. I’ll be done in May, and I tell you what I’m so sick of pedagogy and curriculum development and evaluation that I can’t even think of a thing that I could do because of it. But it feels good, and all the information I am learning is actually paying off, since it involves much of the big push in education right now.

And through all that is improv! Ad Liberation is gearing up for a comedy festival this weekend (the first of its kind [I do believe] in the Lafayette area). Should be pretty fun. I am especially proud of the festival. I feel that I’ve put a ton of work into it, and I can’t wait to see how it turns out. Everyone in the group has pitched in to make the thing a success, and it’s going to be awesome.

Claims of “awesome” not verified by any scientific institution.

So as far as this blog goes… I don’t know. There have been not as many recipes as I initially wanted, which is okay. I don’t really care about being a cooking blog anymore. There will be more, but there will also be more of other things. I am not going to pledge to write more frequently, because that is an oft broken promise. In my list of life priorities, keeping up a blog is near the bottom, between “play video games” and “pat the cat”. But there will (probably) be at least weekly posts, since some friends and I are maybe going to start writing more frequently about some topics that we choose or whatever. Hopefully that keeps up – if you’ve been trying to follow my Picaday 2012 blog, forget about it. I have so many pictures to post, it seems like a lost cause. Leave me alone about it.

Time to pat the cat.

Nutella Oatmeal Crunch Bars

2012-05-24T17:43:00.001-07:00

Who doesn’t like Nutella? Nobody. Nobody doesn’t like Nutella. Because everyone likes peanut butter, and everyone likes chocolate, and everyone likes hazelnuts. So everyone doesn’t not like Nutella.

Even better in cookie form. Even even better in bar cookie form, because who likes making a ton of stupid cookie ball things? Everyone. Er, no one. No one doesn’t not like doing that.

Anyway, here’s a thing to do. My mom used to make oatmeal crunch bars when I was a kid. She probably still makes them, when she knows I’ll be around.

YOU WILL NEED:

2 sticks of butter
1 cup white sugar
1 cup brown sugar
2 eggs
1/2 cup crunchy peanut butter
1/2 cup Nutella
1.5 tsp vanilla
2 cups flour
2 cups old fashioned oats
1 tsp baking soda
2 cups chocolate chips
pinch salt

YOU WILL NEED TO:

Turn on the oven. 350.
Melt the butter in the microwave. I like to just use the large mixing bowl that I’m about to mix everything in for this. But you could also just soften it and transfer it. You do whatever you want, I’m not your boss.
Mix everything all together all at once. Why prolong things? We just want to be together. Mix until everything seems pretty much all over everything else.
Press into a greased 9x13 pan.
Put it in the oven at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes.
Let cool for about half an hour before devouring – if you want solid-state cookie bars. If you just want to use a spoon, go for it. Do whatever you want. See step 2, sentence 4.

Peanut Butter Blondies

2012-04-29T20:01:00.001-07:00

Honestly, this one has been a long time coming. I first made these as a Secret Santa present for someone before Christmas. I meant to write the blog, but never got around to it. Fortunately, another opportunity presented itself in the form of a birthday party for Mary and a few of our friends. We decided to make it a dessert party, so along with these we had many other tasty things to eat.

We also had a bounce house and a piñata, but that’s another blog altogether.

The pictures at the top and bottom of the finished product are from this past weekend. The process pictures are from the Secret Santa. They both turned out pretty much the same though.

Anyway, here’s how to make these. The majority of this recipe comes from Joy the Baker. Any tweaks I might have added probably came from me not wanting to measure correctly.

Enjoy!

YOU WILL NEED:

For the blondies…

10 tbsp butter
2 cups brown sugar
1 cup peanut butter
2 eggs
2 tsp vanilla
pinch salt
2 cups flour
1 tsp baking powder

And for the frosting…

6 tbsp butter
3 tbsp cocoa powder
pinch salt
2 cups powdered sugar
~3 tbsp milk
1 cup chocolate chips

YOU WILL NEED TO:

Preheat oven to 325.
Melt the butter and sugar (from the blondies list) in a largish saucepan. Remove from heat when the butter is completely melted. Let cool for a few minutes.
Stir in the peanut butter until it is completely melted. Let cool for a few more minutes.
Whisk in eggs and vanilla. (The cooling was to prevent the egg from cooking when added.)
Add salt, flour, and baking powder and stir together until all dry ingredients are mixed in. Don’t overstir!
Pour batter into a greased 9x13 pan. You can also spread some parchment paper underneath it – but be sure to grease that as well. It’s pretty thick, so you’ll have to do some spreading. (These pictures are from the first time I made it. The second, more recent time, I did not use parchment paper, and they came out just fine. So you have options!)
Bake for 20-25 minutes. Use a toothpick to check for goop. If you have goop, keep cooking.
While the blondies are baking, start on the frosting. Put the chocolate chips in a microwave-safe bowl, then into the microwave for 30 seconds. Stir until melted.
In a different bowl, beat together the butter (helps to soften it first), cocoa powder, and salt.
Add the powdered sugar and milk. Continue beating.
Add melted chocolate from step 8. Beat it up. Add more sugar/milk if you need more thickness/runniness, respectively.
Spread over the top of the blondies.
My method here is to heat up the frosting slightly, then pour it over the top of them. If you need these right away, though, that is not the best idea. If you need them the next day, or in a couple of hours, then go for it. It should cool down enough by the time you need it.
Cut them up, and eat them up. Sprinkle some more powdered sugar over the top of them if you like.