Mens Life and Support

Suffering from a Brake Up and Cannot Get Her Back?

2009-12-29T21:13:00.001+10:00

Dealing with a breakup is especially difficult and I welcome contact by any man needing advice what they should do.

Sense of LOSS
It is more common than you may think for men to feel that they don’t know how to continue after they have lost their ex girlfriend. They remember the promises and commitments they made to each other. You may feel that you have lost your sense of self without the presence of your partner or girlfriend. If you feel resentment towards their ex partner because you either cannot get her back or because she left, you will need to move on and establish a sense of self again.

You will probably find it difficult to deal with all your emotions after a breakup.

That thing to Remember
In light of all this, I just wanted to give you a simple reminder that I truly hope is helpful. You may already know what I am about to say. But some of you might need a gentle reminder and it is with that in mind that I share it now.

Your relationship didn’t define who you where, it is the person you are in all areas of your life that defines you.

In fact, you are still the same person you where before the breakup, your character qualities, unique traits are still all the same. Many areas of your life may feel as though they have changed, it is only the relationship, and you are still the same person you where before.

In fact, have YOU changed at all? Going through a breakup brings about many changes, however I put to you that YOU don't change.

Growing from the Ashes
You may start to discover things about yourself you may have never known. Having to be accountable for one’s self is a great learning experience, take it onboard and grow yourself.

No matter what you discover or learn I guarantee that you will come out of your separation as a stronger person.

Be Positive and Active
I wish I could say that all of you reading this will be able to get her back. A few lucky people will be successful in getting back together, but unfortunately some will not. We all have our free will, even our ex’s.

You can weather the storm and learn to grow from the loss and believe in yourself. Draw strength from your friends and family. Be active. Do things you’ve always wanted to do.

Also give yourself time to be alone, you will need to grieve and come to terms with what has happened, but learn from it, don’t dwell on it. Life IS good. So ARE you. Now get out there and enjoy it.

Leave yourself open to Love
I really hope you are feeling positive about the future.

No one can tell you how to feel, and I know you may not be feeling too good these days. You may not get her back, but I really hope you realize the good in yourself, in your life and the fact that you will be loved again.

Believe in yourself and that you are the most important person in your world, don’t let yourself slip away from you!

Do you want some additional help with learning how to move forward? Then this ‘How to Become an Alpha Male’ it is a great way to learn all the best traits and give you the best chance in the world.

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

Points to Consider - To Get Her Back

2009-12-27T17:10:00.001+10:00

Concentrating on anything when you lose someone you care about, can be difficult. You will most likely have to look at yourself if you really want to get her back. You need to identify the reasons for the breakup. Did you do something that she didn’t like? Can you change enough for her or your next partner?

Admission
Can you change enough so that these problems no longer exist? It may be too late to change, but it will not hurt to try. Apologize and make amends. Apologizes may not be the only step necessary to get her back but it will be a fantastic start. If you are unsuccessful so far then letting her know that you are sorry and can admit to your mistakes is leaving the opportunity open for her to return at a later time.

Turning the Table
After admitting and apologising for your mistake the next component to get her back is to make her to want you back. That sounds like common sense, but so many people don’t do it.

Hurdles
If you burnt your bridge with your girlfriend, then restoring your relationship will be hard but not impossible. Be patient and respect her space, she has a lot to sort through. Always keep a cool head, be nice and keep communication lines open. You need to put aside any anger or bad feelings when you are with her and if you actually have these you need to look at yourself and work out if it is her you really want. Make her remember your good qualities and what she liked about you when you were happy. If she feels you have truly apologized for what caused the break up and she sees your sweet side again, you might be able to get her back.

Communication
Paying attention to her whenever you are together is essential. Do not interrupt her when she is talking, but don’t make her do all the talking either. Women commonly communicate differently to men, don’t tell her how to feel or how to solve a problem, discuss it and ask her how she feels about it instead. Always keep your main aim in mind, you want to get her back!

Her Response
Don’t forget to pay attention as to whether your efforts are working. She is likely to open up more to you when she is starting to feel more comfortable. If she is starting to think more about you she may answer the phone differently. If you find she is initiating contact with you then she most likely wants you back. Your efforts are working if she is asking you out!

Self Improvement
Impress her with how you are able to look at yourself and change the negative points in yourself. By growing as a person you are showing her how much you want her and that you are prepared to self reflect and grow as your relationship matures.

Finally
Successful communication will go miles towards helping you to get her back. Improve your communication skills and grow as a person – The Magic of Making Up.

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

Why Women Dump Men

2009-12-26T22:07:00.001+10:00

In most situations when a relationship breaks down, it will be the woman that has decided to end it. The reason women tend to give for a relationship breakdown is not always the “real” reasons and the reasons may remain a mystery! If she has left and the relationship is over it may be best to move on. It always feels better to understand why these things happen. This is called “closure” by Psychologists, by allowing us to understand the cause and move on with our lives.

Following are some of the reasons why women dump men:

Common Interests
Over time many people change, their likes, dislikes and preferences, this is also the case for relationship, for some they are just not fated to spend eternity together. If your girlfriend decided it wasn’t working, then it probably means that you’ve both changed since the start of the relationship and you don’t fit together so well any more. Or maybe you’ve gotten to know each other a little better and discovered you don’t have all that much in common.

The most common reason for your girlfriend or partner to end a relationship, as harsh as it sounds may be because they do not see a life with you.

Respecting Each Other
When respect is lost between couples they may also decide to leave. It’s good to remember that attraction works in various ways for women than it does for men. Women can be attracted to various attributes in a man and the key attributes may include long term security, a man that respects their appearance and the ability to be included in supporting the family. She may feel that the relationship does not have a long term future with that person if they are not showing they want to be a part of her future.

Insecure Girlfriend
As far as attracting women goes, having the desire to provide a good quality of life for them in the future is a good bet. A partner might end a relationship if she feels her partner cannot give her sturdy support when she needs it. This may seem all a little old fashioned however that is not what it is about, it is about having the goal to provide for the relationship and support each other.

Stress
Stress is another reason why women dump men. At times women may consider altering their life due to excessive demands on their time, they may end their relationship if it is contributing to these stresses. If this is the case, it is important to respect that everyone has their own priorities in life.

If you give your girlfriend time and support, you may find that she comes back to you when the time is right.

In the end, there are an infinite number of reasons why women dump men. Every relationship is different, and if yours ended it probably needs more work or was not destined to be. The important thing to remember is this: It isn’t anyone’s fault. If your relationship has ended and you cannot get back together then it is best to just move on and leave it to be. Remember there are plenty of girls out there. You’ll meet ‘The one’ one day, when you are ready. When a relationship ends there are always things you can do for yourself.

First - work out what went wrong, do this by looking at yourself not your partner, as change always comes from within, you cannot change someone else.

Finally, get yourself a copy of the Alpha Male System and make a change for the better.

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

How to Win Her Love Back

2009-12-24T09:45:00.004+10:00

Have you done something wrong? Or perhaps something you have done was perceived as silly. This may be the problem or not, but the fact is your relationship has ended. Understanding that the relationship was never meant to be is one method of moving on. If you can’t let it go though, and you’re certain that she’s the one, there are some things you can do.

Here’s how to win her love back without seeming desperate:

Forgiveness
Not a long, soppy apology. Don’t plead, or beg forgiveness. There is more to an apology than the actual words, it is also about being responsible enough to take responsibility of something you may have done wrong.

Simply saying “I am sorry about --- I have never changed the way I feel about you. I really want to continue to be friends”.

Stay Strong but Gentle
Do not ‘beg’ as this is not a way how to win her love back. It’ll just make you look vulnerable and pathetic. Often confidence, boldness and strength is what you need to display, as women are drawn to these qualities. Displaying your confidence to deal with difficult situations will improve your chances. It may sound strange, but by displaying to her that you aren’t emotionally crippled by the break-up, you are showing her that you are the kind of man that can give her a secure future.

It’s a sure thing that if your girlfriend was once in love with you but isn’t any more, they don’t respect you in the same way. If you have recently been made single, the best thing you can do is to use it as an opportunity to rediscover who you are when you are on your own in the world. Do the things that made you happy before the relationship and try to identify what direction you want to take your life in. Respect is won by respecting yourself first, you need to have a purpose, a direction in your life, not just living day to day or weekend to weekend goal.

Be Sweet
Don’t pay unhealthy amounts of attention to your ex-girlfriend’s life, but feel free to ask after her through your mutual friends. If you see something she’d like, tell her about it. This is a gentle way of showing that you still care for her, but don’t go overboard with the suggestions.

Be Patient
Sometimes a bit of patience is all you need. If it’s meant to be, things will work out.

These are some methods on how to win her love back. If you are going to chase after your ex girlfriend, follow these methods but make sure that it is her you really want. Going through all the effort to get them back only to break up with them is bad karma. You might even think about leaving it for a couple of weeks before you decide to start winning her back at all. To win her love back it doesn’t have to be rushed, patience and distance is needed for both of you.

If you want to win her love back, then you really need to get yourself a copy of The Magic of Making Up, have a read of this review.

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

Why Do I have An Insecure Girlfriend

2009-12-23T21:57:00.002+10:00

At times men will find themselves needing to provide additional nurturing and reassurance to their girlfriend because of issues around insecurity.

In order for insecurity issues to be addressed we need to ask certain questions, for instance: what is the cause of the insecurity?

Insecurity can be caused by numerous reasons, by asking the question we can help to uncover the cause, for instance: jealousy and low self esteem are two common factors. By revealing the reason why our girlfriend is feeling insecure we can start identifying ways to help her feel more comfortable in the relationship.

Help to overcome the issues around your Insecure Girlfriend

Jealousy
It is almost an automatic response for men to glance at another woman that is walking by. We cannot go around with eyes closed forever and we notice what goes on, but it is essential that your insecure partner understands no matter how much you look around, it is her that you have always desired.

Imagine if your partner was constantly flirting or casting eyes at other men – you would have cause to feel insecure, too. An additional problem with insecurity is that your partner may start to think you are having an affair just because of a few late nights at the office or a few business trips have taken you away.

Of course, you are not, but how do you prove to someone that you are not doing something they think you are? Honestly you shouldn’t have let it get to this stage, she should know that you only have eyes for her, trying to convince your partner that you are not having an affair will be extremely difficult. Be honest, be romantic and always tell her how you feel about her, do spontaneous things to surprise her and make her feel good about herself.

Self Esteem
Opening up with your partner and being honest about how you feel - telling her you love her, you care about her, how great she looks, telling her about your day and listening to hers is a great way to build security and self esteem. By returning home to her, or she to you, you need to talk about your day and your experiences, don’t let the stress of work come home, as your girlfriend may misinterpret the signals. So share your day with your girlfriend – talk with her but not to her.

Many great relationships fall to an insecure girlfriend or partner, and often as a woman grows older she loses her confidence; she sees herself ageing, and believes that you will no longer find her attractive.

Reassure her that she is the love of your life, tell her how great she looks, if she never dresses up then take her out to dinner or a show and tell her. Do special things for her at random unsuspecting times to show your love and respect you have for this woman you love. Give yourself and your girlfriend the best chance of a successful relationship in an imperfect world; make her feel good about herself.

If you are interested in learning more about dealing with an insecure girlfriend or partner, check out this review - The Magic of Making Up Review

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

The Secret of I Miss You Poems and Letters

2009-12-22T13:03:00.001+10:00

Are you looking for a way to tell your girlfriend or partner how to say you love her. We men are not always prone to displaying our romantic traits in public. We have all grown up understanding that Poems and Romance go hand in hand, it can help in winning her heart for the first time or winning her back again.

The great poets Shelley and Keats were famed for their romantic outpourings. Their influence still show in the popular love songs commonly portrayed today. There are many songs on the radio today that portray love and loss, so why not send her an I miss you poem?

The following are just two occasions when it is a great idea to send an I love you poem:

• Initially is when the relationship is going through a rocky patch, and
• If you relationship ended and you really want to get back with your partner.

Taking the latter instance first, there are certain guidelines to be adhered to when using I miss you poems in such cases.

After any breakup both you and your ex girlfriend need time to heal and immediately sending her poems and letters to try and get back together will not help. Give her and yourself some time and distance to recover and sort out your own thoughts.

After you have given her some time and space, send her an I miss you poem or letter, but not something that is over the top, just something to say you are thinking of her. Now you need to wait for her response, do not ask her for one, or even expect one - but there will most likely be one.

When a relationship ends or goes through a stressful time it can be difficult to say what you really mean and like many men it is often that in the heat of the moment we say what we don’t mean, using an ‘I miss you poem or letter' can really help yoy. Of course, not all of us are great poets – in fact, very few of us are – but there is a trick we can use that is very helpful.

Every day we go into the shops we see cards that are already written for us, we just need to put our name to them, so to with I miss you poems. A poem written by a professional will be able to portray what you want to say in a much better fashion than one written by someone who does not know where to start!

By saying what you really feel through an I miss you poem you are displaying that romantic, gentle and caring side of yourself. In showing your ability to look for romantic gestures and trying something new you are showing your ability to grow as a person. Showing you can use these poems and letters will only benefit you and your ability to restore your relationship, strengthen your relationship or help you to build that new relationship.

Want to read more about I love you poems and letters? Yes!

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

Tips on How to Win Her Back

2009-12-21T10:01:00.000+10:00

You are going through a very stressful time. If you love a women with all your heart, it is heart wrenching when she leaves. It feels as though an important part of you is missing. Motivation can be difficult to get back when you have lost your love.

It is not the only comfort you need; but take some relief knowing that you are not alone.

The internet is a great place to find advice on how to win her back. This heart wrenching topic has libraries of information on it. You will certainly be offered information and recommendations from your friends and family.

The problem is that advice on how to win her back can be conflicting. What advice is worthwhile? The truth is that winning back an ex can be difficult. You need to ensure that you don’t mistakenly force her away for good.

What To Avoid
Pleading is a mistake you need to ensure you don’t make, it will not help you to win her back. The first thing you may feel like doing is phoning, emailing or smsing, her to tell her you still love her and cannot live without her. Hearing this from you will make you seem desperate and needy and she will not respond in your favor. Your ex is more likely to want you back because you want to be with her not because you need to be with her.

Avoid using sly techniques if you honestly want to win her back. Bribing and blackmailing your ex into getting back together will not work. If she will not take you back never threaten to harm yourself or play mind games. Don’t make promises about yourself unless you intend on following through with them. Avoid trying to make her jealous by dating other women. You ex is likely to see right through these tricks and will not help you to get her back.

Things To Do!
If you pester your ex or refuse to give her any space after you break up she will be glad that you are no longer together. It is a necessary step in the repair process to avoid contact, to help you win her back. There is the old saying distance makes the heart grow fonder and this is what you need to allow happen now, give her time to think about what she has done. Stay away from the places you know she is likely to be at, don’t call her, sms her or contact her in anyway, leave her to her own thoughts for at least a month.

You need to honestly ask yourself questions why you think your relationship ended:

- Ask yourself what YOU done that would have contributed to the breakup?
- Did you pay attention to her and what she said?
- Did you spend quality time with her?
- Do you have flaws that she or others picked up on?

Finding faults in your ex will not help you to win her back, you need to look at yourself, as you are the only person you have control over.

Of all tips on how to win her back the most important is to avoid becoming depressed. Do not sit at home grieving about what has happened, as this is toxic to you. Pick up a paper and see if there are things in there that you would like to try out. Become the man you were when she was first attracted to you. When it comes time for you to meet up with your ex, be cool and relaxed, treat her as a good friend.

Get your essential guide to win her back, it will give you the best possible opportunity to restore your relationship. Help yourself grow as a person and as a partner with The Magic of Making Up.

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

Common Sense Tips on How to Win Her Back

2009-12-20T08:52:00.001+10:00

Loosing someone you really love is a difficult and painful experience. I wanted to share some information around what you should and shouldn’t do to help you out. It is common for male emotions to overtake us and lead our actions down the wrong path.

Avoid the Following
You may think that you should aggressively pursue your ex in order to get her back. You certainly should avoid doing this at all costs. The first thing you need to know to win her back is that you do not want to chase your ex.

Too many guys think they must pursue their ex’s. Stalking your ex’s home or work, consistently calling at odd hours of the day or night, will only hinder your chances.

These are all things you need to stay away from, as it will make you look like a desperate or worse, a dangerous man. You run the risk of your ex stringing you along if you do not stand up and be a man. She may try and get you to buy her things with no intension of actually being with you. She could give you false hope by promising something but pulling out at the last minute.

The more you fall into this trap, the more games she’ll play. This is not the solution to win her back, also:

- Don’t flirt with other girls especially if your ex is around
- Don’t go out on a date with one of her close friends
- Don’t try to keep track of her by befriending her friends

If you do any of these she may just become jealous and this will not help to win her back. Doing this will just reminder her how insecure and immature you are.

Good Ways to Win Her Back
You need to show her how YOU have changed, rather than chasing after her and highlighting your insecure traits. That you have learnt from any mistakes you made in the past and you have grown emotionally.

Become comfortable with your own company and yourself. Women are more attracted to men that are comfortable within themselves. Don’t try to change your ex as this will only serve to drive her away, focus on the changes you can make, change yourself to be the best person you want to be.
Learn more about yourself. Get into contact with old friends and catch up. Build a list of personal goals and start achieving them. This way, whether you get the girl back or you move on, you will be a happier and more confident person.

If you are serious about how to win her back, and want to give yourself the best opportunity, then this is essential. Help yourself grow as a person and as a partner with this guide – The Magic of Making Up.

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

1000 Questions For Couples Review

2009-12-19T19:52:00.001+10:00

One of the biggest reason marriages end in divorce is because couples fail to ask the big questions before they walk down the aisle.

Getting to know your partner through asking the RIGHT questions can greatly improve your changes of staying together.

The best thing about a “question book” is that it can help you both to ask questions that you would have normally been tempted to gloss over, it also creates an safe environment to ask them.

But is Michael Webb's "1000 Questions for Couples" the right book for this?

Simply, yes. Other books just gloss over the hard to ask question or just don’t have enough to really get to know your partner.

Webb has done an outstanding job in putting together this detailed collection of questions to ask your partner. Before you get hitched you owe it to yourself to ask about every topic that is covered in this guide.

Get to know more about past and present relationships, children and child rearing, money, personality, sex and even convictions.

But don't get me wrong ¬ there are many serious and tough subjects to discuss. It also covers many of the more easy to discuss subjects as well. .

So what did I really love about this book This book is a really great way to get to know all the great things about our partners. Don’t worry about opening up the book and starting from page 1, you can start from anywhere that suits you, on any question that you want.

If you have problems choosing which questions to ask, you can get three to five questions emailed daily to help you out. So you don’t need go through the entire book trying to work out which ones to ask your partner or work mates.

I really don’t believe you can lose out by this book, knowing more about your partner can only be a plus. This book is nothing short of exceptional, delivering on everything it promises and covers everything you would ever want to know.

I highly recommend this book for everyone. This book can benefit anyone, regardless if you are looking for a relationship, been in a relationship for 20 years, or just want something for a truth of dare game.

What to know more: 1000 Questions for Couples

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

Friends with Benefits Rules

2009-12-18T14:06:00.000+10:00

What is the universally known, difficult to attain relationship? Friends with Benefits. Courtship, who needs courtship when you have a Friends with Benefits relationship, just enjoy the sex. In reality, things can get pretty complicated in this sort of relationship though, simply because of the emotions that are automatically stirred up when two people get it on. You need to be careful that one person does not really want more from this type of relationship, as it could cause major problems.

Check out these basic ‘friends with benefits rules’ to help you navigate the treacherous waters of this type of relationship!

Find out if she is attracted to you here - Signs of Physical Attraction

Rule 1: Just Sex, No Jealousy
Treat her no different than any other friend, male or female, until the benefits are abound. Attraction can be tricky, but ensure that you are only attracted to her sexually and as a friend, that’s it. You are only helping each other to release some sexual tension; and if either of you start to get romantic feelings you need to reassess your situation right away. It is absolutely essential that if either of you start to have feelings for the other you must talk about it. You may be surprised that you both may have developed feelings and you have the chance to move into a proper relationship, perhaps avoiding the courtship. If your or hers change in feelings are not reciprocated it is best to know either way. The bottom line is that you’ve got no right to feel jealous of your ‘friends with benefits’ being with other people unless you let them know exactly how you feel.

The best advice is: If things change or you want things to change discuss it with her.

Rule 2: Use a condom
Roll it on before you start playing. It protects against unwanted pregnancy, as well as STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections). Protection is an essential requirement for this arrangement, she will respect you more for it.

Rule 3: It is okay to say no
Men can say NO too. It is ok if you need to turn down your friend if you want to say No. When you have intimidate time is entirely up to you as well – and the fact is that not being allowed to have you will probably make her want you even more next time. It’s sexy for a girl to be sleeping with a guy who is in a position of power and is prepared to say no, on occasion.

Rule 4: Balance
Life pays the bills, don’t let fun take over – well completely! We all want great ‘benefits’, but don’t let it take over your life, education and job are essential. While you are not having sex you need to actually live your life. Make sure you keep it in perspective.

Rule 5: Single is must!
You want to know the most import thing about friends with benefit rules? If you are single, you can sleep around with whoever you wish to. If you start a relationship you need to end the benefits! You need to agree with your friend that if either of you gets into a relationship the benefits end, however the friendship can continue.

Although it’s okay to have “friends with benefits”, rules are essential. If you follow these basic principles you can make the most out of a fantastic situation.

Get the confidence to approach women and start a friends with benefits relationship - The Alpha Male System Review

For all the best information on supporting men in and out of relationships go to Men's Life and Support

Tiger Woods - Alpha Male, Typical Sportsman Or Just Mislead?

2009-12-17T08:35:00.000+10:00

Do you feel sorry for him, worship him or just think about the effects this whole scandal has had and will have on this family? Depending on the type of person you are, will depend on who you sympathise with. How did he manage to get into this situation, and how do you get it without the negative media?

Tiger Woods and the count keeps on changing! You would have realised that not all of these are actual affairs. On the other hand there may be other girls that are just happy in their own knowledge and are not seeking to make a quick dollar.

You have to wonder about the truth in these stories and I think it is a pretty safe bet that not all of these girls will have been totally honest. After all most people believe they deserve their fifteen minutes of fame, and whenever you pull out some dollars, many more are happy to come forward.

The appeal to Tiger Woods is based on two key area's, the sportsman and the profile, and these are driven by the type of man he is.

Become and Alpha Male Today

The Sportsman

Right from teenage years, girls are after the sportsmen and this really doesn't change as people mature. Many women come to realise that it is not just the athletic person that is able to provide for them and just like nature, their interests do change.

The appeal of a sportsman will never go away for most women. But this becomes a fantasy for them and something that is best used to enhance a relationship not be threatened by it.

The Profile

Men, women, kids, we are all guilty of worshipping someone in our lives. We all find someone to look up to. Someone to that we can model our lives, attitudes and/or beliefs on. It is more often than not, that these people are sportsmen, why I ask? I will go into this more with the type of man Tiger Woods and other sportsmen are. Have you ever met your idol? Most people will not have and there is a very good reason to keep it like this.

Profiles built around people are better referred to as a brand, it often doesn't represent the person. If these women really wanted to meet their idol, they would never in a million years seek to profit or cause pain from it. They are seeking a relationship with an idol not the person. So what makes the idol so powerful?

The Man

An idol or someone that is looked up to has some very distinct qualities. In a business they would be called a leader (not manager). Men look up to these other men as Alpha Males and women seek to gain their approval as they are typically unattainable. Sportsmen are people that have a passion for something, a drive that gets them to the top of either game and as a part of this, they develop an Alpha Male quality. The Alpha Male is a leader because people want to follow them; they don't seek approval from others because approval is sort from them. It is no wonder it is easy for Tiger Woods to get the affections of a women.

Being the Alpha Male & Leader will continue to help him in manage this difficult period with his wife and kids. Not because his wife and family will continue to seek his approval, but because he will be able to be man enough to admit his mistakes in total and treat his family with the respect they continue to deserve.

Cheating on a spouse is never condoned; however it is easy to see how he can have these offers presented to him. Just consider for a minute the type of person he would be if he was single. He could potentially be the next most eligible bachelor, perhaps there are a few magazines hoping for this.

If you want to know the secrets of How to Become an Alpha Male like Tiger Woods, then get yourself a copy. Don't worry, you don't have to get yourself a passion that will drive you to be the next sports wonder star. You can get these qualities just by changing a few small things in yourself. Stop being a Beta Male!

If you are interested in relationship advise for men the come and have a look at Men's Life and Support. We are hear to help men to grow and deal with lifes challanges

How to Become an Alpha Male Review – Part 2

2009-12-10T13:13:00.000+10:00

Welcome back to Part 2 of the How to Become and Alpha Male Review written by John Alexander.

Part 1 of the review covered off on the following topics:
Chapter 1: The Truth about Women’s Love of Sex – It May Surprise You
Chapter 2: The Number One Dating Mistake Men Make and How to Avoid it, Once and for All
Chapter 3: The Three Kinds of Men – Alpha Males, Beta Male “Nice Guys,” and Jerks

Part 2 of this How to Become an Alpha Male Review continues to focus on relationships as well as moving beyond the relationship realm to cover off details on your life in general. Including your perception to others and common behaviours to avoid.

Chapter 4: 24 Nonverbal Cues that Scream “I’m Non-Dominant.” Get Rid of Them and Score!
The cues covered in this chapter focus on verbal and non verbal cues that emphasis the difference between the three types of men (for a definition of these, check out my blog on How to Become an Alpha Male Part 1).

The recommendations and examples provided by John Alexander are for everyday use not just for when you are dating. They can be key when talking to colleagues, supervisors, managers, conducting presentations as well as relationships. All of these tips are great to take into everyday life to improve your appeal and appearance to the world.

Chapter 5: Six Beta Male Behaviors to Avoid
These Six Traits of a Beta Male seemed so obvious while I was reading them, but I know I am at fault of doing these on occasion, especially within my day to day life at work. John really hits on how these fail us in our lives. He also goes into greater detail about avoiding these Beta Male behaviors by changing the way you see a situation and acting or reacting in an Alpha Male fashion.

I especially like a comment near the end of this chapter, it is so small and simple but it is so true, “Be your own man”. Not being your own man is truly a Beta Male trait. I summarize the key here to be honest to yourself and display the traits you want to be known for, so long as they are positive of course.

Chapter 6: How to Be an Alpha Male – When You’re Taking Order from Someone Else
I found this chapter to be lacking a little actually, it is only short and consumes only 2 pages of this 164 page ebook, so no big loss. I feel that the tactics so far highlighted in previous chapters can be used within this environment.

I believe it is possible to be an Alpha Male while having a boss. After all an Alpha Male is someone that is confident, reliable and radiates authority. Any manager or supervisor that doesn’t use this to his benefit and seek to get the Alpha Male onside in a mutual agreement is really doing himself a dis-service. And by having other people see the respect offered by your boss because you are an Alpha Male only improves your position as the Alpha Male.

Chapter 7: Project Your Ideal Self by Controlling the Way You’re Seen
Well... This chapter contains so much useful information about perception. It is difficult to cover of all on the topics and situations that John discusses. As an overview he discusses the Human Psychology for getting women to like you, ways to reinforce good behaviour in women, complimenting women correctly, how to listen (a great eye opener for me), nonverbal cues that signal you are an Alpha Male, myths about using Pity and more behaviours to be avoided as an Alpha Male.

Controlling the way you are seen is very involved, with much to keep in mind and behaviours to avoid. This chapter has very valuable information in the quest to be perceived as the Alpha Male you strive to be.

Do you want to know more now, click on this link and start improving who you are “How to Become an Alpha Male”. I will continue reviewing future chapters in further blog posts. In the mean time you can also check out my web site at Mens Life and Support.

You Cannot Get Her Back – Just Remember...

2009-12-08T15:01:00.000+10:00

I am always receiving emails and messages from men who are having a really difficult time dealing with their breakup

Sense of Loss
It is surprising how so many men feel they cannot live if they cannot get back with their ex's. They remember all the great times and commitments that where made to each other. Men commonly feel they have lost their sense of self without the presence of their partner or girlfriend. They are struggling to work out where they sit within the world.

It is always difficult to manage all the feelings that are experienced during and after a breakup.

That thing to Reminder
In view of this, I wanted to give you a simple reminder that I honestly hope is useful to you. I realise it is very simply and I apologies for this and you probably already know what I am about to say, but some of you may need a gentle reminder.

...Your relationship status may have changed, but you are still a great person...

In fact, you are still the same person you where before the breakup, your character qualities, unique traits are still all the same. Although many things may have happened in your relationship, and your situation has changed, you’re still the same great person.

In fact ask yourself the question, How much have I changed? Changes are inevitable during a breakup, but you are still YOU!

Growing from the Ashes
The breakup may have even helped you to discover things about yourself you may never have known. Perhaps you are stronger than you ever thought. You will undoubtable discover how to do a lot of things your ex use to do for you.

No matter what you discover or learn I guarantee that you will come out of your separation as a stronger person.

Be Positive and Active
I wish I could say that all of you reading this will be able to get her back. Some of you will, but sadly some won’t.

You can weather the storm and learn to grow from the loss, believe in yourself. Draw strength from your friends and family. Be positive and be active. Find or remember the things you’ve always wanted to do, or use to do.

Also give yourself time to be alone, you will need to grieve and come to terms with what has happened, but learn from it, don’t dwell on it. Think positively and what you can gain from your new environment. Life IS great, so learn to enjoy it.

Learn to Feel Again
I hope this message comes across with the spirit in which it was intended.

I cannot tell you how to feel, and I know it will be hard for you. Just realise and remember the good in yourself, in your life and the fact that you may not get her back but you WILL find love again.

Believe in yourself and that you are the most important person in your world, don’t let yourself slip away from you!

You can visit me at Mens Life and Support.

We Want You to Get Her Back

2009-12-07T17:26:00.000+10:00

When a relationship comes to an end it can be difficult to concentrate on anything other than her and what you have lost. The first thing you will need to do is to look at yourself, if you really want to get her back. Whatever happened to cause the break up should be looked at. Did you forget to do something, consistently? Can you change enough for her or your next partner?

Admission
If it is something that you didn’t do, then perhaps it is something you can do. Undo something, or do something you should have done already. Apologize and make amends. Admission may not be the only step necessary to get her back but it will be a great start. If you really want to continue to have a chance with her, then telling her that you know what you done wrong and that you are sorry is leaving the door open to rekindle the relationship.

Turning the Table
Now that you’ve moved past what caused the break up, the second step to get her back is to encourage her want you back. That sounds like common sense, but so many people don’t do it.

Hurdles
If the relationship ended with her angry and upset, then you have to show her how you can make her happy again. Don’t be demanding with your advances, she will need time to come to trust you have changed. Don’t try to just jump back into your relationship whenever you do meet, follow her queues. Whenever you meet up make sure you are happy and looking forward to it. Treat it has a first date, you are there to impress and she needs to feel like she with a new person, but one that is familiar. If she feels you have truly apologized for what caused the break up, you stand a better chance to get her back.

Communication
It’s important to pay close attention when you see or talk to her. Do not interrupt her when she is talking, but don’t make her do all the talking. Women commonly communicate differently to men, don’t tell her how to feel or how to solve a problem, discuss it and ask her how she feels about it instead. Always keep your main aim in mind; you want to get her back!

Pay Attention
Don’t forget to pay attention as to whether your efforts are working. She is likely to open up more to you when she is starting to feel more comfortable. If she is starting to think more about you she may answer the phone differently. Perhaps she is calling you or sending you SMS’s more than she did before. Your efforts to get her back are working if she approaches you to go out!

Why You
She will want to be around you more if you show how much you have changed for her. Reminding her of why she liked you in the first place and being that person can go a long way to helping her want you back now.

Finally
The most important part of restoring any relationship and to get her back is communication, keeping it open, honest and friendly will always work in your favour. Finding the right questions to ask can be difficult and those deathly silences are not only nerve racking but also relationship killers get this 1000 Questions for Couples Guide to avoid those situations, always have a question to ask.

If you are interested in more information on restoring relationships or self development have a look at Mens Life and Support.
“Helping men to grow and deal with life’s challenges”.

How to Become an Alpha Male Review - Part 1

2009-12-05T16:14:00.000+10:00

How to Become an Alpha Male is a guide written by John Alexander from both personal experience and subsequent professional research. It is a guide designed to help the average man make themselves more attractive and dominant in their surrounds, hence an Alpha Male. It is not about making oneself appealing to women or primarily focused on how to pickup and ‘catch’ women. As John Alexander goes into, it is more than just personal relationships that benefit from being an Alpha Male.

I believed this product to be so worthwhile that I decided it would be valuable to everyone out there to write a little about each chapter so you can see how valuable this can be for you and how it can benefit every facet of your life.

Some key benefits to this easy to read product are:

• Develop Your Ideal Personality
• Use Body Language to Your Advantage
• Attract Women and Become Successful at Seduction
• Self Improvement through Reflection
• Overcoming fears
• Many others

Chapter 1: The Truth about Women’s Love of Sex – It May Surprise You

John touches on some interesting points about how to make a women feel at ease with themselves and you, when you are in a social setting. Along with some common mistakes about how men can react negatively when presented with typical female comments.

Chapter 2: The Number One Dating Mistake Men Make and How to Avoid it, Once and for All

This is such a common mistake. I even continued to make this mistake right up until I separated from my wife. It is so common and so easily avoidable. This is a key lesson on your path to becoming an alpha male and will improve your chances with any women by making you more comfortable to be around and go out with.

Chapter 3: The Three Kinds of Men – Alpha Males, Beta Male “Nice Guys,” and Jerks

Have you ever been a great friend and wondered why women only think of you as this great friend, then perhaps you are viewed as the “Nice Guy”. John Alexander goes into some detail about the nice guy and what the problems are with it. Like him I to was told by the elder women in my life (mother, grandmother and Aunties) that this is what I should be. He also makes the distinction between Alpha Males, Beta Males and the Jerks as where they are positioned within relationships. After reading this you will understand how each type of Male is needed in society and how to identify them.

Want to know more now, click on this link and start improving who you are “How to Become an Alpha Male Review”. I will continue reviewing future chapters in further blog posts. In the mean time you can also check out my web site at Men’s Life and Support.

Avoiding A Break Up – Physical Contact

2009-12-04T15:04:00.000+10:00

Most people have lost a love and understand how painful it can be. Understanding not only the pain but also the reason why the relationship ended is the key to avoiding a break up next time. You will never be able to avoid all of them as some people are just not meant to be together or at least grow apart over time. Don't dwell on your failures and learn from them, it may even help you to restore a past relationship.

There are a few sign's that you need to watch for in avoiding a break up. One such sign is the lack of physical contact...

Physical contact is not only intimate it is any type of contact. She may suddenly loose interest in sex, or holding hands, putting their arm around you at the cinemas, touching and kissing both when you are together privately or in public.

If it goes beyond not touching, to them actually becoming uncomfortable at your touch, then you definitely need to have a conversation with your partner about how they are feeling. Never assume that because your partner flinched away from you that your relationship is on the rocks and a break up is certain. Many things can cause a partner to not want to be touched at any given moment.

They may have been in a completely different mind space or you may have just startled them. She may think that every time you touch them it is just because you are after something more. This is a habitual response, as it has been built over time and will take time to break down, but don't assume this will lead to a break up. Your partner may just not be in the mood for intimacy or personal contact right now and chose to display this by moving away from your touch rather than more effectively verbalising.

She may just not feel well, depressed about something outside of the relationship, or she may have issues with her other friends that are taking over the way she feels. Every change in a person’s behaviour doesn’t signal an impending break up or even anything wrong with your relationship.

Pay attention to your partner and get to know them, know what they like and communicate with them as often as possible. This is not just about events, but delve further, ask them how they feel about things and try to elaborate how you feel about them as well. Effective Communication will always help your partner to open up with you, it will build trust and enhance your friendship.

Find out more about Mens Life and Support. Do you want to improve your communication check out the 1000 Questions for Couples.

Does Marriage Counseling Work?

2009-12-03T13:31:00.000+10:00

When going through difficulties within a marriage it is worthwhile to take a look at marriage counseling. Many people are reluctant to take this path believing that it doesn't work, is too expensive or just because of the old stigmas around counseling. Counseling can work! The success of this service will always depend on various factors. The majority of people that undertake counseling do get some form of benefit to either themselves or their relationship. Some will feel that it didn't help, or it didn't yield the results they wanted. The following highlights some points that are essential to answer 'yes' to the question ‘Does marriage counseling work?’

Relationship Commitment

For marriage counselling to work both parties must be committed to make it to work, they need to want to either save the relationship or make it stronger in some way. When only one person is resolved to restoring the relationship then the chances of any successful outcome will be considerably reduced and it will be likely to answer 'no' to 'does marriage counseling work?'

The counselor provides an environment between you and your partner that allows for structured communication. If someone does not believe in the process, then the ability of the couselor to successfully mediate will be hindered. It shoudld to be a two way street. If you have selected a good counselor they may be able to skilfully overcome problems around individual reservations.

You need to both feel comfortable with your counselor

Another essential point when asking 'does marriage counseling work?' is if you and your partner feel comfortable in whom you have selected to mediate your problems. Just like doctors all therapists are different and will interact with you differently. You will need to find a counselor that is good for you, someone that you feel comfortable with. After all this is your marriage that is at stake you need to give it every opportunity to work.

Willingness to work at it

Discussing your relationship problems with a counselor is only half of the solution. It is very beneficial to have a comfortable and neutral place that allows for structured communication. Many counselors will provide tools to take away with you, to focus on between sessions. Utilising these tools and exercises, you are improving the value of your sessions and growing skills for the next session. Willingness to work with the tools outside of the sessions with your spouse, will improve the likely to answer 'yes' to 'does marriage counseling work'.

Being Strong

The final two points to discuss about this question, 'does marriage counseling work?' are:

- Sticking with it, and
- Living through the difficulties before you see the gain

Many couples stop going to couselling due to various reasons. Feeling like it is not working and becoming discouraged by the process.

You need to understand that it will become more difficult before it improves. When you approach therapy you should be prepared and understand this. You are there because you have problems and these need to be discussed openly and frankly. It will seem to create more pain and discomfort for you. It will be painful, however by airing out your problems you can start to address them.

If you address these key points then the answer to the question, ‘does marriage counseling work?’, will most likely a resounding yes. It will never be easy and it may take some time. Ask yourself another question is your partner worth it, and if they are then go through the pain, and give yourself the best opportunity to succeed.

Find out more at Men's Life and Support and check out some great products I have to help relationship problems Best Relationship Advise Guides

Male Confidence in Relationships

2009-12-02T07:16:00.000+10:00

I find confidence to be a very interesting topic. There is just so much that can be said about confidence and how it affects men, women, relationships and just every part of our lives. The main area I want to talk about is male confidence when you are in a stale relationship. The reason I want to focus on this is because before my marriage breakdown I really suffered from a loss of confidence in all areas of myself.

I was unfortunately a very slow learner in my marriage. Well I actually use the sense of responsibility I gleaned from my parents as an excuse to remain within this stale relationship. I have learnt so much since then. For years I lived within this marriage, I gave up any aspirations I had of learning anything new, I hated my job because I felt I was trapped in it because of family commitments, I even gave up the small stories I use to play in my head before going to sleep about how I would become the leader of ‘The World Federation of Intergalactic Exploration’, ok that may be a little weird for here. But the point is I gave up, I came to the conclusion that ‘this is it, this is the rest of my life’, and as much as I hated it, it was what life had dealt me and I had to learn to deal with it.

Let me just say up front – I am so glad that ended!

I never went out of my way at work to do anything out of the box, I would never put myself forward for anything that required any additional work, I was a drone! I didn’t even remember coming to work or going home most days, I just existed in my day to day life. Taking home the pay check and handing it over. It was boring, self deflating and I was just not being a good father or husband.

After my relationship break down, I sort some counselling, and found out I had a lot of ‘shoulds’ in my life, i.e. – I expected things to happen a certain way because that is what I was use to. So I did two things.

First I throughout everything I previously thought by changing every routine I had, this wasn’t to difficult as I started living by myself, but I avoided taking up anything new and I actively searched for new ways. How to cook, how to arrange my life, changing the route I went to work, learning the local area, checking out markets and taking up a course.

The second was putting myself back out there in the dating game. I had been in a relationship for 15 years and I had reservations as to whether anyone else would want me. I even went as far as keeping a spreadsheet on the number of times I was intimate with a woman and what my average was over a period of time. I know any women reading this would be shocked and no I don’t still keep it, but I did for almost 2 years. And you know what, this was excellent for my male confidence, it taught me that one - other women do find me attractive and did want to be with me and two - that I can adapt to new situations, I didn’t have to take the ‘this is all I will ever get’ relationship.

I have never been adverse to change, I just didn’t have the confidence to bother with it, now I encourage it, I look for new and difference ways to do things and encourage difference and dissimilar and I avoid the usual and stagnate.

If you are having confidence problems please drop me a line at Mens Life and Support, I am always willing to help out.

Men... Depression... Performance Reviews

2009-12-01T16:26:00.000+10:00

Depression, this is such a killer for men. It is one of the biggest killers literally. I really don’t intend on covering of on all the aspects of it or even most, as it is a large problem all over the world. What I want to talk about is depression in the work place.

As it is the end of the year, I, like most people am also subject to the yearly performance reviews. It is something that we all dislike especially if you have to give them to your staff as well. However they should be a positive experience and they really shouldn’t highlight anything that you were previously unaware. It is a dedicated time with your boss or supervisor to reflect and point you in the right direction for the New Year. If it is being used primarily as a report card for your previous year then you have a really old fashioned boss or a new boss that doesn’t understand the process.

I found myself at this year’s review sitting across from my boss with a considerably different view on how I performed during the course of the year. I knew things were pretty difficult all round but not as bad as he thought. In my vocal way, and because the company decided to put a 360 degree comment box on the form I was there for around 2 hours explaining... commenting... advising how we had a communication issue and why I thought we had problems.

At the end of it I felt pretty good that I was able to get it all off my chest and I had none of those thoughts of ‘I wish I said that or I forgot to mention this’, even though I was completely unprepared for what I did say. So the exercise and 360 degree reviewed worked as it should have, I think my boss was a little surprised and I think his eyes where opened a little. Only time will tell if either of us really learnt from the experience.

None the less, I did feel a little depressed about the result and really wanted more recognition for the work that was achieved; after all, I passed on the congratulations to my staff in their reviews.

This feeling did last for a couple of days and I was luckily enough to have a group of men that I regularly meet with to discuss feelings, emotions and life in general, where I was able to express this a little more constructively and put it into a forum of trust.

One thing I really did learn is that I can move on, by looking at the way I am thinking and identifying that it is depression and the cause was the review. In my normal fashion, I asked myself, what can I do about it? I could either continue to dwell, or learn from it and move on. I am big on learning new things so I chose to learn and move on.

To be able to do this though was only possible by having a forum of men and a place of trust. You always have to be ready to communicate, the more effective you are at it the better you will be at getting your point across in a fashion that can be understood and appreciated by others.

Confidence and Communication – Check out more at my site – Mens Life and Support

Insecure Girlfriend – Jealousy and Travelling

2009-12-01T10:20:00.000+10:00

Insecurities in partners and in fact ourselves can be challenging to deal with. They can consume our thoughts and take up considerable about of our time. There are many forms of Jealousy and I was recently posed a question that I found difficult to respond to.

I have a girlfriend of about three months, the relationship is going great and she asked me this question last night... Are you learning dancing to do more than just dance with girls when you are away? To put this question into context, I am going to South America in April 2010, I started taking Salsa Dancing lessons and booked my trip prior to knowing her. To be honest when I started my dancing classes, along with my Spanish classes I would have answered ‘Yes’ to this question, it was to improve my chances of an active night life and to increase my chances of just having a great time. So what do I do now? I have offered her to come to dancing with me as it would be great to do with her, but she can’t.

My response went something like ‘I am learning it just so I can get the most out of my trip and have an enjoyable time away, I highly doubt any 18 year old backpacker would want a middle aged man that is starting to show his greys’. I am also thinking that I shouldn’t have to justify myself either, but I will cover off that topic in another blog.

This response was certainly not the best, but really what explanation is there, especially when you are asked just before going to sleep and just after our own intimate experience. I really want to have a great time, the whole purpose of dancing is to dance with the local women, as I am sure other backpackers will not have gone to the lengths I have to learn. Having fun with women does not have to lead to anything more than just dancing and a few drinks, perhaps I could also benefit from a local travel guide. Any interaction with women when on holidays, that is not your own girlfriend, is going to dredge up feelings of insecurity in your girlfriend through Jealousy.

Saying there is little I can do about the way she feels is not quite true, it is all about her believing that I am a faithful person, by getting her to understand that intimate contact is not my aim for the trip. Although she is not joining me on the trip she can still participate by helping me research and plan the trip, by knowing where I am going and understanding what I will be seeing and doing. In involving her in the preparation we are maintaining communication about my trip and I am not keeping it a black hole that she knows nothing about and it will also aim to build trust between us, and improve my chances of seeing and doing as much as possible while I am away.

The key to any form of jealousy in an insecure girlfriend is trust and the easiest way to build trust is communication.

Check out some great information on trust at my site especially the 1000 Questions for Couples

Dealing with an Insecure Girlfriend

2009-11-30T15:53:00.000+10:00

At times men will find themselves needing to provide additional nurturing and reassurance to their partner because of issues around insecurity. However, the important part of helping an insecure partner lies in the answer to this question: why is she insecure?

You need to ask this question because there can be many reasons for insecurity: jealousy is a very common factor and low self esteem another. The key is to find out why your partner is feeling insecure, if either of these two factors is the cause and why she feels that way at all.

Jealousy
It is almost an automatic response for men to glance at another woman that is walking by. Your girlfriend needs to know that is it her you have eyes for and it is only her that your heart beats for, she needs to understand and feel secure in your relationship with her.

Imagine if your partner was constantly flirting or casting eyes at other men – you would have cause to feel insecure, too. It is also possible for girlfriend to see and feel things that are not there, for instance if you are away for work or out for a few late nights, she may think you are not being faithful.

How do you prove to your girlfriend that you are not having an affair? Honestly you shouldn’t have let it get to this stage, she should know that you only have eyes for her, trying to convince your girlfriend that you are not having an affair will be extremely difficult. The old romantic tricks work, but don’t overdo them, and the reassurance and loving touches add to the picture and reduce the risk of jealousy.

Self Esteem
Self Esteem is an essential part of a relationship, your girlfriend needs to feel good about themselves just as you do, by telling them how you feel about them, that they look great and sharing your life with them. If you are stressed at work and come home, say nothing, and let it build up she is bound to feel insecure: is she the problem, she thinks? So share it with your partner – communicate with her but not to her.

It is easy for a relationship to become unstable and breakdown due to insecurity in general or an insecure partner, she may no longer feel as good as she once did due to aging and lack of communication.

You need to assure her that she is the one for you, that it is her you love, want to be with, and want to remain with. Be honest with her, show her how much you love her and care about her. By helping to make your partner feel special you will be reducing any insecurity that may exist and will be giving your relationship the best chance of success.

This is a great place to start if you want to improve the relationship between you and your girlfriend - Insecure Girlfriend - The Magic of Making Up Review

What is Mens Life and Support

2009-11-30T15:30:00.000+10:00

Welcome to the Mens Life and Support blog page. I hope I can help all men grow and develop out of relationship issues and life's challanges.

Men's Life and Support is built to provide information and guidance to men suffering from relationship and life's problems. As well as:

- To show you, you are not alone
- Guide you through some constructive choices
- Shock, bewilderment and hurt
- Desperation, ready to drop off the planet
- Loneliness and sadness
- Frustrations, powerless and anger
- Duzziness, with thoughts spinning in circles
- Awareness of some hard choices having to be make
- Determination to stand ground and battle to the bitter end

At this stage Men's Life and Support is focusing on restoring the relationship with your wife or girlfriend. I really encourage your feedback and recommendations as it is the intension to make this valuable and useful information for all men and women wanting to understand or support men during their growth. After all it is always a two way street. It is never one persons fault, or one persons need to grow or change, people grow together and if they don't, that is when things need to be addressed.

Check out the Site @ Mens Life and Support