Middlefocus

Men in the Middle by Kori Reed

2023-09-21T00:21:00.000+01:00

Title: Men-in-the-Middle

Conversations to Gain Momentum with Gender Equity's Silent Majority

Author: Kori REED

Publisher: Pure Ink Press, 2023

Ebook ISBN: 979-8-9875866-5-5

My rating: 5*

The media soundscape reverberates with discussions on gender issues often emphasising equity issues in the workplace. For some reason male voices seem to be silent on the conversations that need to be had. This was one of the key observations put forward in this challenging yet engaging book by Kori Reed.

The book's structure is built around conversations with men discussing various workplace practices and situations, which being familiar to me as a male rang true. The premise was inviting and moments into the introduction I was hooked. I think I realised right from the outset that this should not be a quick read - the ideas and challenges shared would need time for reflection and action. So I took a chapter at a sitting. You can read each of the eleven chapters in 20 minutes or so but since each ends with a summary of key points and questions to consider it’s possible to spend a similar amount of time or longer in the reflective process.

And that was what happened.

In fact days after finishing the book that reflection continues, brought back to mind by a news item or reported instance of inequitable treatment. Of course reflection is one thing but the challenge is not to remain silent and to take action. Is writing a blog post joining the conversation?

The author is at pains to explain why men need to be part of these equity conversations. In the United States, for example, men represent just under half of the population but occupy the majority of leadership roles in organisations; the author contends that men therefore are already in positions to make a positive difference. She revisits this point in different chapters. We are hooked alright and in the nicest possible way she is not letting us off that hook! In a compelling argument and reinforcing her point about people already in positions of influence being able to help, she cites a strategy adopted by Martin Luther King. As part of his civil rights campaign, in the background, Dr King built key relationships with people in the white “middle” who could influence change.

The style of the book is user-friendly and the tone encouraging especially when she explores with her interlocutors male reticence in taking part in equity conversations. I appreciated the subtle shifts in mindset; these guys really had something to say. The author has been able to show us that there is a lot going on below the surface; in the "bummock" as she puts it, that large part of the iceberg hidden from view.

In its later chapters the book takes aspects of an existing model for change and applies that discipline to the gender equity equation. I felt that was useful and I liked how that equation was couched in terms of mutual benefit - a win-win for organisations.

I read the book in e-format and looking back over it a moment ago I can see that I have highlighted significant portions to consider further; to memorise and to follow up. As mentioned above an extensive reference section is provided with sources detailed for each chapter. This is very well organised - meticulous. I clicked on several of the links suggested and following up on her references for the Martin Luther King strategy I spent quite a while reading articles on that from the Washington Post. All pertinent stuff. I have also signed up for newsletters and further information from some of the sites concerned. The momentum is underway.

In conclusion, I would say that this book is a call to action. A shout-out to men to break their silence. It would be a powerful resource for leaders in all types of organisations seeking to have a workplace characterised and enabled by gender equity. I imagine those with interests in personal and organisational effectiveness will gain useful insights and strategies for further development and I readily commend the book to their attention.

It has thoroughly engaged mine.

More:

Author's website: https://www.korireed.com/

I was grateful to receive an Advance Reader Copy (ARC) of Men in the Middle from NetGalley, where it is now archived. Here is a link for further information.

Routes and Roots: Caminos de Sefarad

2023-05-27T00:51:00.001+01:00

Routes:

One of the things that has left a lasting impression from our recent trip to Seville was learning how for centuries Jews, Muslims and Christians lived together in peace. The Jewish legacy can be discovered in the Caminos de Sefarad / Paths of the Sefarad - the term used by the Jewish community to refer to Spain.

Roots:

We spent an afternoon in Seville walking the old quarter of the city tracing its multi-cultural past and there in a courtyard saw the physical expression of that living together - an orange tree and a palm tree growing from the same plot of ground.

Routes and roots.

Songs of a Sourdough

2022-11-05T23:32:00.002+00:00

This is a much-loved book. My dad's.

The pen was his too.

C.Tracey etched in cursive script.

Same details as mine.

Heirloom.

Public Reading - Donal Ryan

2022-10-19T23:39:00.001+01:00

Back at a public library again!

This time for a reading by author Donal Ryan. We almost missed the event as when we applied for seats registration was already full. A helpful staff member put us on a waiting list and sure enough some spaces became available. We jumped at the chance to attend.

I love his writing and with the addition of his latest, the queen of dirt island, have all his books. The one he is reading from in the picture above gave him, and then his listeners, some amusement. It was an early publication version and the cover had been presented upside down. The sections he read though were powerful and his literary talents are assuredly the right way up.

At the library event he talked about the process of writing and the critical inputs of editors and family members. He invited questions and responded to these at length revealing in the process further insights into his literary journey.

We were delighted to hear that this current title invites a follow-up.

Thank you LibrariesNI.

Brilliant!

Check out more on the book at this link.

Pen and Ink

2022-09-15T22:32:00.022+01:00

The new King Charles III, is signing all sorts of documents these days and recently had some trouble with a fountain pen. It may have been an official or a borrowed pen but in any case on this occasion it oozed ink and he complained this happens "every stinking time!"

I love writing with my pen. I'm left-handed and over time the nib has adapted to the way I write. Fountain pens are personal to the user. The ink in mine flows brilliantly but might not if loaned to another, say right-handed user.

Ink residues are inevitable when filling and I keep a well-blotted napkin to wipe the barrel and remove excess.

Love the ritual of filling the pen - every inking time!

Vote here

2022-08-07T00:02:00.031+01:00

A short break in Derry/Londonderry. A vibrant city with much going on.

Everywhere we went we felt very welcome. There was a festival taking place - apparently there's always something going on - and we did plenty of walking.

Out and about, I couldn't resist snapping this pic of a refuse bin.

Yes, it's a tidy city too.

You've got our vote and we'll be back soon.

Library reading group

2022-07-21T22:49:00.002+01:00

I haven't been to a Library Reading Group before and a bit unsure of what to expect. But I have been enjoying The Black Dress by Deborah Moggach and am looking forward to discussing it.

I saw the flyer when borrowing a couple of books from my local library and since this was a title which suggested content that I wouldn't normally go for I thought I would give it a try.

Expand my literary horizons.

There's a reading group meeting each month and I figure it's both a stimulus and discipline for staying on track with reading goals.

I'm also told there'll be a cuppa and biscuits to relax participants into the discussion.

Here's a link to more information on The Black Dress.

A bookmarked book

2022-04-22T23:10:00.001+01:00

Judged a book by its bookmark!

I had ordered this very large book on the visual strength of its giveaway bookmark, a stack of which were on the counter at my favourite bookstore.

I picked the book up today and now cannot wait to get into it. It is three books in one I'm told and "big as it is you'll not want it to end".

Here goes then... To Paradise.

Check out this link for more details about the book.

Stirrings of spring

2022-02-15T23:20:00.001+00:00

A time for every purpose...

Some current readings, suggesting stirrings of spring?

Mudlarking

2022-02-02T21:13:00.000+00:00

Title: Mudlarking

Lost and Found on the River Thames

Author: Lara Maiklem

Publisher: Bloomsbury. 2019

ISBN: 976-1-4088-8921-3

I thoroughly enjoyed this book and feel that I have learnt so much from it about the Thames and its impact on history down the centuries. I particularly liked the writing style. Each chapter, focussing on a location along the river's course, begins with a literary extract describing those who make their living on and from the Thames. The author provides historical details in a very accessible way, supplementing them with her own deductions, hypotheses and intuitions; along the way she shares with us some of her personal biography connecting that to the places she visits. She had a particular connection with her precious Greenwich where she had lived for 13 years. She also introduces us to some of her mudlark friends who come across as a friendly supportive group of like-minded individuals.

I started reading the hardback edition and when I spotted that it was also available in audio format I didn't think twice before downloading the spoken version which I was able to play while travelling. That too was a treat. It was beautifully read by the author. BBC Radio 4 had also broadcast it in its series "Book of the Week" albeit in an abridged form.

I was sorry that the book has come to an end but it's one that just as a true mudlark returns to their favourite spots along the river that I will certainly read again. Walking beside a river will never be the same again; this book has awakened my inner mudlark and I'm ready to get busy exploring.

Farewell Joan Didion

2021-12-23T20:55:00.021+00:00

The writer and social commentator, Joan Didion has left us for good on 23 December 2021. It is perhaps fitting that not long before Christmas she goes Slouching Towards Bethlehem, the title of her first work of non-fiction.

The Year of Magical Thinking is an astonishing work - remarkable insights into bereavement.

December Stories by Ian Sansom

2021-12-08T22:15:00.001+00:00

I have thoroughly enjoyed this collection of short stories for December by Ian Sansom. My intention was to read just one story a day for the month; to get me in the mood for Christmas. The stories however are so captivating that I found myself reading on and so finished them after about a week.

They instil a mix of emotions: sympathy, humour, sadness and vulnerability. Despite the quick read some of these vignettes have found their sticking place and the simple everyday situations he writes about resonate with personal memories of feelings, thoughts and actions. So although ostensibly these accounts relate to the end of year festive season they also speak to the human situation and the business of getting on with life. They therefore would be immensely readable in other months of the year.

I have to mention one story in particular, Down By The River for 23 December. It's one of the longer pieces in the volume and oddly when I started reading it I had recently just watched two films: It's A Wonderful Life (1946) and The Bishop's Wife (1947) both of which feature angels interacting with troubled humans. In Down By The River, we meet a brilliantly constructed pot-bellied foul-mouthed angel, so unlike the models depicted in the films. I enjoyed that story very much.

Anyway to cut a short story even shorter, the book is finished but there remains the possibility of a re-read of the first volume in similar vein - December Stories 1.

Do yourself a favour and get either, better still both, of these books, then return to them annually in December or any other time of year.

More

December Stories 2 by Ian Sansom

Published by No Alibis Press

November 2021

ISBN. 978-1-838108-13-7

The Inseparables by Simone de Beauvoir

2021-09-16T00:04:00.051+01:00

The Inseparables: The newly discovered novel

Simone de Beauvoir - Author

Translated by Lauren Elkin

Introduction by Deborah Levy

Afterword by Sylvie le Bon de Beauvoir

Publisher Random House UK,Vintage

Publication 2 September 2021

ISBN: 978-1784877002

“ They called us the inseparables”

Lasting friendships that were formed in early childhood are a fascination for me. What is it that brings individuals together, keeps them together and makes them inseparable? And for me, as an avid Francophile, add to that the “mystery” of why a novel by French writer Simone de Beauvoir should come to light years after the celebrated author’s death then I’m hooked.

Format

I had joined the member community at NetGalley, requested and was sent a pre-publication copy of The Inseparables. Long time aware of, but new to reading de Beauvoir, I was grateful for the introduction by Deborah Levy who rightly pointed out that her foreword contained spoilers. I decided to stay with that however as it helped provide context and has prompted me to read some of de Beauvoir’s other works. Then on to the novel itself, translated from the French by Lauren Elkin, only confirming the intention to read more. The text was accompanied by helpful footnotes explaining this or that term or historical background. And what about that mystery? The afterword, written by Sylvie Le Bon de Beauvoir, explains how the work was found among de Beauvoir’s papers and came to publication. The afterword includes photographs of the people aliased in the book and some facsimiles of the original handwritten draft.

So in this small volume we get the story, the literary legacy and social context of the work. That impressed me and I liked it very much.

Plot

The book recounts the story of two young women, Sylvie and Andrée, who meet in primary school at a very young age. We learn from the opening dedication For Zaza that the story was inspired by the relationship between the young Simone in whose name Sylvie speaks and Elisabeth ‘Zaza’ Lacoin represented by Andrée. The two become friends and rail against the prevailing orthodoxies of the time; they discuss God, religion, philosophy and then ultimately face a final reckoning.

Language

I was captivated by the language in the book. Yes there were all those discussions but they were essential to a sense of movement in the text; a dramatic tension drawing us to an anticipated but nonetheless abrupt conclusion that still leaves a sense of inseparability.

Looking back over the text, there are several places where I have highlighted phrases and sections that stopped me short and made me think. I love it when a book does that. For example in describing one of the adults, Sylvie/Simone writes “His silky hair and Christian virtue feminised him and lowered him in my estimation.” That from a central figure in Feminism? And from the socially engaged woman describing their respective freedoms, Sylvie writes that she ‘had often envied Andrée her independence, but suddenly she seemed much less free than I was’. A sense of foreboding comes in a section where there is a description of a sculpted wooden clock, ‘which held...all the darkness of time’. Foreboding reprised when ‘Andrée placed the violin in its little coffin’ after practising her music during which,’she seemed to be listening prayerfully to the voice of the instrument on her shoulder’. There are many such examples, skilfully inserted throughout the text.

One for the shelves?

Definitely! I am delighted to have read the ebook sent by the publisher through NetGalley but this a novel I would also like to have on my bookshelves so I have ordered a physical copy and will certainly reread.

Rating

Cored limpet shells

2021-05-22T22:59:00.001+01:00

Walking along the shoreline at Crawfordsburn Country Park I spotted something unusual - Cored limpet shells suspended from tree branches.

I cannot work out how they got there. But I can think of some questions.

Were the innards of the shells scavenged by sea birds and did they get at the flesh by piercing the crests?

But if they did why are the holes so large and even? Large beaked birds needing room to swallow.

Or did the sea sculpt the hole with its abrasive ebb and flow? Scooping out the weakest part of the shell, where the limpet had no strength to hold?

And were the shells collected by children or beach-combing adults to be suspended from the branches in an act of creativity? They do look pretty.

Maybe it's a coast-liner rag-tree type custom. The hanging of a shell to make a wish or ask for favour.

I'll be on the lookout for cored shells when next there and for a suitable branch on which to hang them.

And make a creative wish.

Strenuous endeavours

2021-03-18T23:26:00.003+00:00

It's by now a tradition in our house on Saint Patrick's Day to watch together a film with an Irish theme. Usually the day offers an annual excuse to watch Walt Disney's Darby O'Gill and the Little People - a film that always seemed to be playing locally when I was growing up.

But this year nostalgia demanded something different, something more in tune with the sensibilities of these pandemic times. The choice was John Huston's last film The Dead portraying the last story in James Joyce's Dubliners set in 1904 on January 6 - the feast of the Epiphany.

The film starring Anjelica Huston, the director's daughter, and Donal McCann was made in 1987 but I first saw it when it was released on VHS, replacing it years later when that platform gave way to DVD.

It would have been lovely if subtitles had been incorporated because some of the language is so beautiful. Not to worry though as the Penguin Modern Classic edition of the book has been a constant companion through various house moves and even more bookshelves.

The 1972 edition, its cover depicting a detail of The Illuminated Town by Jack B Yeats (brother of William B), is showing some yellowing of pages but this somehow felt in keeping with ageing and the passing of time. Having watched the film last night I took the opportunity to read the text again this morning.

In the story the character Gabriel Conroy makes an after-dinner speech in which he laments the disappearance of more "spacious days" and departed loved ones. He reflects that there are many sad memories on our way through life but nonetheless we must continue our work among the living:

"We have all of us living duties and living afflictions which claim, and rightly claim,

our strenuous endeavours".

Joyce writing in 1914 could have been penning a memento vivere - remember you must live - for his time and ours.

As the guests take their leave, there is a wonderfully described staircase moment, superbly conveyed in the film, around the rendition of a song, The Lass of Aughrim.

This releases a flood of emotions in our two main characters, bitter regret, jealousy, passion and its absence, culminating in a sharp realisation of the human condition, that connection between the living and the dead.

My DVD film and book will continue our journey together. Granted it might be more poignant to watch and read on Epiphany evenings.

If not there's always Saint Patrick's Day.

Deckled edges

2021-03-15T23:29:00.001+00:00

After initially feeling they were "unfinished" I've been learning about the paper process for deckle edged books. Now, I rather like them.

Dog ears on the other hand still get my deckles up.

Dark Mourne

2020-11-13T12:34:00.001+00:00

A long stroll along an almost deserted beach at the National Trust's Murlough Reserve near Dundrum, County Down. With just a handful of cars in the parking area and passing only a few people on the 600m boardwalk down to the shore, we guessed correctly that the beach would be fairly empty. This really was social distancing.

Buttoned up against the chill and facing the breeze from the sea it wasn't long before blood came rushing to warm the cheeks. No need for an anti-virus mask here. We took deep lungfuls of the fresh salt air and immediately felt the benefit.

The sand was washed smooth with no previous steps before us and the sea seemed to have deposited various qualities of shingle and stone in lovely gradations. A perfect case study for a school geography trip and a salutary lesson in the organising power of nature. Here and there shells dotted the sand, washed ashore or perhaps dropped by feeding gulls. They lay with their scalloped grooves and ridges upward, the anticipated delicacy downward, reminiscent of dropped, buttered toast.

We walked until a stream crossed the beach and turned back towards Newcastle, surmounted by the lovely Mournes, a scissored silhouette against a brightening sky. Donard will be cold today, we agreed.

Then silent reflective thoughts.

How often has this untampered scene been viewed before by people long since gone? And recollected or imagined in the tunes of the songsters who extolled its beauty and missed its presence. This beach has been crowded at other times with families and picnics. Long, bright, summer days. Not now though when our talk is of R-rate, regulations and restrictions.

Sadness for those whose longings have been cut short.

Dark Mourne.

Leaves

2020-10-30T22:16:00.003+00:00

The driveway is full of them. Leaves. They gather against the walls that frame the length of the driveway and road outside the house. Each car that passes flurries them up to find a new resting place or flattens them into the tarmac where they stick unbudging, resistant to all but the heaviest-duty bristle brush.

The leaves that have made our property their home don't come from our trees which are mainly evergreen. They hail from a deciduous domain, from elsewhere but seasons and wind have no knowledge of borders and so there is the annual autumnal task of collection and disposal. If the leaves were from a book it would be a multi-parter as the task of collection is repeated often until the last leaves leave their branches.

A leaf-blower to get my own back was a useful purchase. It enables me to blow them quickly into heaped mounds for later lifting. An old neighbour with country ways once advised me not to waste my time trying to brush them into such piles. Leave it to the wind, he advised, and when it calms down the leaves will have formed themselves into settled piles.

He was right. Working with nature.

The piles are light to the touch and often the brittle leaves break and turn to dust. Their lightness is also a challenge though. Four big scoops with large plastic garden hands fill the barrow. A fifth would lose the precarious balance and leaves would fall off the barrow leaving a new deposit to brush.

No, better to take it gently and often. The piles cannot be left too long as stronger winds will disperse them again and supplement them with fresh fall. So the task is repeated, weekly and they are transposed to that out of the way spot in the garden where leaves can be left to crumble and compost.

The driveway relieved at last.

Road book and press cutting

2020-09-20T23:32:00.001+01:00

How many times over the years have we flicked through this old family heirloom roadbook? The AA Illustrated Road Book of Ireland.

This edition was published in 1970 and was often consulted on trips round the country. We loved its line drawings, its Irish place names and short but nonetheless helpful references. Later versions have better maps and descriptions but this one is the one with character and cachet.

Cachet? A word that denotes quality and distinction. Yes the book meets those criteria but drop the -t and

there is also cache, a word that refers to something hidden or concealed and the book has something to reveal there too.

Extraordinary

Recently as part of a national heritage festival we had been discussing Holy Wells in Ireland. One that was mentioned was the Rock of Doon. Not having been there the conversation turned to - Well where exactly is it? It's north of Letterkenny, a few miles from Kilmacrenan in County Donegal.

Well, we've been there quite a few times but never at the well. So naturally, we would look it up. Internet browser? Not this time. Where else to go to but the old book?

Kilmacrennan. There it was along with its map details and gazetteer entry and a press cutting.

What? An article from a newspaper with words by a J.J. Toolett and a drawing by Gordon McKnight.

How long had that been in there? Who had put it there?

How many times we have looked through that 50 year old book, brought it with us on travels and yet somehow failed to see that cutting from years gone by. Extraordinary that it should come to light to inform our discussions. Heirloom and heritage.

The obvious next steps are to find out more information on the Rock of Doon and to make the journey - should that be pilgrimage? - with the road book and press cutting.

There will also be a reflection on that simple act of scissoring out an article and placing it for safe keeping in a treasured book.

Cachet.

27 seconds of calm

2020-08-09T23:52:00.000+01:00

Where does this take you? What does it take from you? What's left?

King Solomon’s Mines. A 50-year reread

2020-05-20T23:07:00.000+01:00

This book was on the English Literature course when I studied it way back in the 1960s. I suppose its adventure theme, with deadly battles and buried treasure, was judged suitable to capture the interest of 16-year-old boys. Boys and their reading - still a matter of recurring educational concern.

I came back to the book after having watched a TV programme in which it was referenced. The programme charted the course of the English novel and, as one of its themes, explored literature associated with Empire and colonisation. Hooked, I decided that it might be interesting to reread KSM after more than 50 years. An early front runner of this type of story there are many books of this genre today and this one is still easily available.

Stuck in my memory

Some of the characters and situations had certainly stuck in my memory and as I met up with them again, I wondered why that was. Since they stuck, there must have been something that appealed, and I consider now that it was that adventurer aspect. However, the most obvious thing that struck me from the reread was just how much society norms and values have changed since that time. Some of the references and dialogue struck me as somewhat racist and sexist, not to mention scenes of hunting and ivory gathering, and on occasions caused some moments of discomfort. These attitudes were prevalent in the late 19th century. I'm glad that we have left lots of that behind but I'm just as sure that a toxic residue remains. Why keep reading then? Perhaps a good way to learn what one’s values are is to be aware when they are being offended. But was the sixteen-year-old offended? Or did I simply take it for granted? With 50 years hindsight I stuck with the book.

Audio narration

What might have been helpful to me as a sixteen-year-old student was the audio narration that is available, read by Timothy Jones. Read - the word doesn't do the rendition justice. It was a consummate voiced performance in which he took on the range of voices from the narrator, Allan Quatermain to the screeching Witch doctor, Gagool. The accompanying narration made for a quick reread. On occasions I read, listened and did both concurrently. That's a technique I'll be using more in the future to engage with even more books.

Biltong

One last thing…A sixteen-year-old once learned what biltong was. That was a word that also stayed in the memory thanks to its use in this story. The product is available in a local supermarket, so I got some.

Something else to chew on.

Toeing the line

2020-05-02T00:07:00.002+01:00

An indoor queue this time.
The simple strips adhered profusely over the mall floor kept everyone well apart. No jostling, no creeping forward. The shoppers waited patiently for each to be called forward in turn. Respectful distancing.
Seems like we've all got the message.
Complying. Toeing the line.

Palm Sunday 1925

2020-04-05T09:00:00.000+01:00

Palm leaf crosses presented to churchgoers on Palm Sunday

Today is Palm Sunday. 5 April 2020.

The occasion recalls the Entry into Jerusalem at the beginning of the first Holy Week in the Christian tradition. This year services commemorating the Entry have been curtailed as a result of the Covid-19 Coronavirus.
The virus has taken its toll with many succumbing to its deadly onslaught.
Their personal Passion...

My dad was born on a Palm Sunday.
It was 5 April 1925.
As first born in his family it was no doubt a celebration. A Hallelujah!

It always amused him that his own father would on the occasion of Palm Sunday each year wish him a Happy Birthday. My grandad, we called him Granda Christy, never seemed to realise that Palm Sunday just like Easter is an ecclesiastical and therefore a variable date. Some still don't get this as calls continue to be made for Easter to have a fixed calendar date. Commercially driven no doubt.

But maybe in that bygone age it was perhaps more appropriate, congruent with belief, to remember the religious occasion rather than the actual date of a birthday, however special.

Today though, on this date 95 years later, the wishes would have been appropriate.
And my father would have appreciated the sentiment.

Happy birthday dad.
Hallelujah!

Marrakech closed openings

2020-03-31T00:40:00.001+01:00

Books are like old friends

2020-03-16T12:27:00.000+00:00

Books are like old friends. That's certainly the case with this one that an old (and still) friend presented to me as a gift 60 or so years ago.
It says something about the nature of gifts back in those days - the pleasure of the printed word.

It's on my reread list and I'm wondering whether it will feel dated by today's standards.
That's because I reread King Solomon's Mines a while ago and felt that some of its themes and attitudes were of their time and could be considered inappropriate by today's standards.

So in preparation for my reread I did some background research into the Coral Island.
That's a story in itself.

I'm still going ahead with the book and will try to recover the experience of that first read. Six decades ago.
I love the gift of the printed word. A gift that keeps on giving.

Yes, books are like old friends...the older the nicer.

More:
Interested in the book, its author and creation? Check out the Wikipedia article here.