I write like
a drunken monkey with a typewriter

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Inspiration from Mr. Hines

Baskerville, “Goudy Old Style”, Palatino, “Book Antiqua”

I’ll probably come across some others, but for now…pretty ampersand fonts, duly noted.

That was my result when I tried two short stories and the prologue to a novel. Then I tried an Amazon review and it told me I write like Dan Brown. (Not my review of Twilight, though. For that, I apparently channeled Meyer herself.)

Then I put in another novel’s prologue and it told me I write like David Foster Wallace again.

Oh, and Cormac McCarthy writes like Ursula K. Le Guin.

• Wolfram|ALPHA: brainchild of Google founder which answers questions
• Craiglook: the Craigslist search engine with a GUI
• Shop Goodwill: Goodwill has an auction site; imagine the gems which could be found there
• How Americans Spend Now: interesting look at how some Americans are spending in the recession
• OMGPOP: as if I needed another time waster
• The Dooce Archives: one of these days I’m going to sit down and read every single entry from day one…maybe
• Menus of Old: Kottke.org: because in the late 19th century, they also included a bill of rights with their meals
• Real Dolls Factory Pics: can you say creepy? (yet fascinating.) and it comes with video
• The Deplorable State of New Media: because Gene Weingarten is an hilarious old codger
• Boost Creativity and Part 2: who couldn’t use a bit more creativity in his life?
• Periodic Table of Swearing: mental note: must purchase table…and badger them to make it into a desktop background image
• **** My Kids Ruined: I’m sure my sisters could appreciate this and I can use it as visual birth control

My hope waned when I saw all the butcher paper, but there was still an inkling, so I removed the paper…

And found…

iPhone screen protectors. Hope gone.

Amazon Packaging Failure. (Thank goodness I recycle.)

(And to the folks residing in South Florida, let’s all say a collective prayer that the clouds will disperse thereby eliminating any chance of rain…)

(Title: Sketchbook Dump #13 (or, Unfinished Sketch of Christian Kane as a Shirtless Avenging Angel). Sorry for the watermark, but you know how TehInternetz can be. Also, sorry for the crappy scan.)

Now for the explanation…

I’m not big on doing fan art that doesn’t involve fictional anime characters. The last one I did was of Aaliyah when she was still alive, if that says anything.

But, one morning at God-Isn’t-Even-Awake-Yet o’clock my phone rings. It’s my friend J, but let’s call her Bucket o’ Crazy (BoC for short), who says, “You have to check your email right now!!!!1!! *squee*”

Me: (still half asleep) What’s email?
BoC: NOW!

Thinking that the world is on fire, I reluctantly check my email to find a crapload of pictures.

Me: You woke me up at this unholy hour to look at pics of some random guy?!?
BoC: It’s not some random guy, it’s Christian Kane and I need you to draw him.
Me: The glue you’ve been sniffing must have gone bad.
BoC: With wings.

*longpause*

At this point I should have known better. I should have rolled over, gone back to sleep, and left it alone. But damn my curious nature.

Me: Why with wings?
BoC: Because he kind of looks like an avenging angel, doesn’t he?

*anotherpause* As I stare blankly at the computer screen.

Me: Er…um…since when do avenging angels wear Stetsons?

*yetanotherlongpause*

BoC: And he has to be shirtless.
Me: He has to be…oh sweet baby jeebus and all that is good and sane, WHY?!?
BoC: Because he’s so pretty.

(Here, my darlings, is where I do you a kindness and remove the portion of the conversation that centered on his hair for 10 minutes.)

Me: o_0 … if I agree to do this will you hang up and let me go back to sleep?
BoC: I know what you’re trying to do and it’s not going to work.

Knowing that arguing would be no use, I set the phone down, went to make myself a pop tart and poured some juice. When I returned, bless her sweet little heart, she was still going on about hunting me down or kidnapping my first born or some such nonsense.

Me: If you stop, I’ll draw your damn picture of Dean Kane, shirtless with wings.
BoC: CHRISTIAN!
Me: Sorry, Dean Christian.
BoC: You and I are no longer friends.
Me: Seriously? Does that mean I don’t have to draw the picture?
BoC: No.
Me: But you said we weren’t friends. Hehe.
BoC: STFU and draw!

Yeah, I’m also wondering why the hell I’m still friends with her too.

And J, before you beg me to finish it, I don’t like how it’s turning out, so for now it’ll just be a stub. Maybe, in the future, if I feel so inclined, I may start over and do an illustration that I’ll ink/color in Painter…maybe.

• Reading. Oddly, I woke up with a desire to read a book that I received a few days ago from Amazon. It’s leisurely, but in the quietness lurks something that seems sinister…in a twisted way. That made no sense now that I’ve re-read it, but meh. It’s called Broken by Karin Fossum BTW.
• Writing. Before I went to bed last night, there was the beginning of a story scratching at the inside of my head and it refused to let me sleep until I took up a pad of paper and wrote it down. It’s about a girl who wakes up from death. Morbid, I know. But interesting. Today more of the story is coming to me. What’s stressful, though, is that I still have three other stories which need finishing.
• Drawing. Well, I haven’t technically drawn anything yet today, but oh goodness my hands are quivering to. I have the picture in my head and it wants to get out so badly. I must make some time to do that. (I will only share that it’s along the lines of my taste in reading. Darkly quirky.)
• Laundry. What were Sundays made for if not laundry? ‘Nuff said.

And I did mention there would be random shizzle, didn’t I?

• I spoke with an ex-boyfriend who I hadn’t spoken to in nearly six years. That was…um…there is no word for what that was. It made my brain go numb for a little while afterward. There was so much to catch up on and not all of it good. I think my brain is still a little numb from it.
• CSS Goddess is now set up on its own hosting account and I’ve installed WordPress 3.0 and I’ll be setting it up with BuddyPress and developing a custom theme in the weeks to come. Complete truth be told, I’ve been a bit lazy with the development, but I’ll course correct come this week.
• Torchwood totally rocks. OK, I’ve been a fan of Doctor Who for some years…since before I quit T.V. and I was elated when I saw that Netflix had it in stock, so when they recommended I watch Torchwood because I liked DW, I decided why the hell not? Turns out the spin-off is pretty cool, and a lot more homoerotic than I expected.

I think that’s about it for today. Now I must go draw something.