Milpundit

Boston Marathon Bombing "Suspects" and other Random Thoughts

2013-04-20T10:20:00.001-07:00

Locking down a whole city to apprehend one wounded teenager seemed a bit much; appeals to the collectivist mindset of today's politician. You know, "our children," it takes a village, etc.

After all, citizens are wards of the government and can't be expected to participate in their own security.

I'm just guessing, but the Dzhokar Tsarnaev would have been caught sooner had the citizens of Boston been about their business as usual. Every person a sensor, you know.

The boat owner spotted Tsarnaev after police suspended curfew. As Taylor West put it so well on Twitter:

So lockdown is lifted because they can't find the suspect...which allows boat guy to leave his house...and find the suspect.

Our newest Jihadist hero, now receiving medical attention for wounds from a gunfight with police, will certainly be assured due process of the law.

Here he is with backwards ball cap shortly after placing the bomb that killed 8 year old Martin Richard and severely injured many more in the photo.

I can see the Obama Administration doing cheetah flips to figure out how to spin this into a workplace violence issue, or better yet, new legislation to enlarge the government's role in making marathons safer.

In an unnecessary and gratuitous speech, President Obama said "All in all it's been a tough week. But we've seen the character of our country once more."

And with a president this soft on identifying the enemy in the war on terror, it's certain the country will get to demonstrate it's character more often.

Human carnage aside, it's been tough for Obama, who was really talking about legislative set backs on gun control and the coming "trainwreck" on Obamacare. Time inadvertently got it right, noting:

President Barack Obama pledged to seek answers for the victims of the Boston Marathon explosions about the motives and the planning behind the deadly blasts, even as he acknowledged that the capture of a second suspect brought to a close a trying five days for his presidency and for the nation.

Motives? Seriously? Here's a clue: the bombers were from Chechnya.

Will justice be swift in the Boston Marathon bombings? Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the architect of 3,000 American deaths, has yet to see trial.

What about Major Hassan, who gunned down 13 of his fellow soldiers at Fort Hood? Still untried.

So forgive a little scepticism when the president said of the bombers, "We will hold you accountable."

A big problem was not holding Obama and the Democrat-collectivist-government complex accountable in the last election.

Since we're speculating about causes of the Boston bombings, I'll blame low information voters.

Prince Harry, Beyonce, Bengazi and other Random Thoughts

2013-01-25T08:25:00.001-08:00

Matt Lauer and the Today Show panel were aghast at a Prince Harry interview where the Prince talks about killing Taliban.

Seems that's what soldiers are for, isn't it? Though you wouldn't know it from the reactions of the progressive bedwetters on the panel.

Obama fangirl Beyonce is catching flak for lip synching the National Anthem at the inauguration. On learning of Obama's re-election she famously instagrammed "Take That Mitches."

The young lady seems vulgar and classless - like her dancing. I can't sing and dance, but then again, Beyonce shouldn't opine beyond the limits of her entertainer education.

Speaking of classless, how about our president. Trotting out schoolkids to push anti-gun legislation (and executive fiat) is about as low as you can get. Rush Limbaugh called the kids "human shields."

I like Limbaugh, alot. Obama, not at all.

Wasn't Hillary's performance at the Bengazi hearings stunning? Reminded me of a schoolgirl brought before the principal for cheating on a history test.

Clinton's yelling, crying and equivocating was better suited to a 17 year-old than an American secretary of state.

At least she took responsibility. Much like Janet Reno did after ordering the assault that resulted in the deaths of 74 Americans at Waco, including women and children.

In other words, nothing happened and no one lost their job.

Four brave Americans are still dead, but 2/3 of those polled still esteem Mrs Clinton highly.

If the term "low information voters" ever applied, it's here.

In this age of Obama, seems we've got lots of low information voters. Many folks are starting to notice their social security payments go up.

Wait until the full weight of Obamacare taxes kicks in.

Mr and Mrs Harbaugh have a dilemma. Their sons square off as head coaches in the Super Bowl. Seems hard work, genetics and luck pushed the Harbaugh boys to the top of their profession.

Congratulations to the Harbaughs on this most American dream come true.

You Know Your Country is Run by Idiots If...

2013-01-02T07:16:00.000-08:00

An 80 year old woman can be stripped searched by the TSA but a Muslim woman in a burka is only subject to having her neck and head searched.

You can get arrested for expired tags on your car but not for being in the country illegally.

Your government believes that the best way to eradicate trillions of dollars of debt is to spend trillions more of our money.

A seven year old boy can be thrown out of school for calling his teacher "cute" but hosting a sexual exploration or diversity class in grade school is perfectly acceptable.

The Supreme Court of the United States can rule that lower courts cannot display the 10 Commandments in their courtroom, while sitting in front of a display of the 10 Commandments.

Children are forcibly removed from parents who appropriately discipline them while children of "underprivileged" drug addicts are left to rot in filth infested cesspools.

Working class Americans pay for their own health care (and the health care of everyone else) while unmarried women are free to have child after child on the "State's" dime while never being held responsible for their own choices.

Hard work and success are rewarded with higher taxes and government intrusion, while slothful, lazy behavior is rewarded with EBT cards, WIC checks, Medicaid and subsidized housing, and free cell phones.

The government's plan for getting people back to work is to provide 99 weeks of unemployment checks (to not work).

Being self-sufficient is considered a threat to the government.

Politicians think that stripping away the amendments to the constitution is really protecting the rights of the people.

The rights of the Government come before the rights of the individual.

Parents believe the State is responsible for providing for their children.

You can write a post like this just by reading the news headlines.

You pay your mortgage faithfully, denying yourself the newest big screen TV while your neighbor defaults on his mortgage (while buying iphones, TV's and new cars) and the government forgives his debt and reduces his mortgage (with your tax dollars).

Your government can add anything they want to your kid's water (fluoride, chlorine, etc.) but you are not allowed to give them raw milk.

Being stripped of the ability to defend yourself makes you "safe".

You have to have your parents signature to go on a school field trip but not to get an abortion.

H/T Dave Sallee

American Football Humor

2012-10-27T11:51:00.000-07:00

Ohio State's Urban Meyer on one of his players: "He doesn't know the
meaning of the word fear. In fact, I just saw his grades and he
doesn't know the meaning of a lot of words."
___________________________________________

Why do Tennessee fans wear orange?

So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday, go hunting on
Sunday, and pick up trash on Monday.
___________________________________________

What does the average Alabama player get on his SATs?

Drool.
___________________________________________

How many Michigan freshmen football players does it take to change a
light bulb?

None. That's a sophomore course.
___________________________________________

How did the Georgia football player die from drinking milk?

The cow fell on him.
___________________________________________

Two West Virginia football players were walking in the woods.

One of them said, "Look, a dead bird."

The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?"
___________________________________________

A University of Cincinnati football player was almost killed yesterday
in a tragic horseback-riding accident.

He fell from a horse and was nearly trampled to death.

Luckily, the manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged the horse.
___________________________________________

What do you say to a University of Miami Hurricane football player
dressed in a three-piece suit? "

"Will the defendant please rise."
___________________________________________

If three Florida State football players are in the same car, who is driving?

The police officer.
___________________________________________

How can you tell if an Auburn football player has a girlfriend?

There's tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck.
___________________________________________

What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas cheerleaders in one room?

A full set of teeth.
___________________________________________

University of Michigan Coach Brady Hoke is only going to dress half of
his players for the game this week; the other half will have to dress
themselves.
___________________________________________

How is the Indiana football team like an opossum?

They play dead at home and get killed on the road.
___________________________________________

Why did the Nebraska linebacker steal a police car?

He saw "911" on the side and thought it was a Porsche.
___________________________________________

How do you get a former Illinois football player off your porch?

Pay him for the pizza.
___________________________________________

What are the longest three years of a University of Kentucky football
player’s life?

Freshman I, Freshman II, and Freshman III.

Colin Powell Endorses Obama, Again

2012-10-25T07:27:00.002-07:00

Way to go, Mr Powell.

Is there a 16 trillion dollar debt in your country?

I wonder what Scooter Libby thinks of your claim that you're still "a republican?"

Giving Obama the Bird?

2012-10-25T06:43:00.000-07:00

Obama's Jihad Problem

2012-10-24T09:07:00.002-07:00

If you're Barack Obama, it's bad news when your administration's cover-up on the Benghazi fiasco unravels days before the presidential election.

An election Obama's losing.

CNN reports that State Department emails identified Islamic terror group Ansar al-Sharia as claiming responsibility for the attack on our consulate in Benghazi that left four Americans dead, including U.S. ambassador Christopher Stevens.

It took the White House until September 19 to correctly call the attack "the work of terrorists."

Ambassador Stevens complained about security in Libya the day he was murdered:

On Sept. 11 — the day Stevens and three other Americans were killed — the ambassador signed a three-page cable, labeled “sensitive,” in which he noted “growing problems with security” in Benghazi and “growing frustration” on the part of local residents with Libyan police and security forces. These forces the ambassador characterized as “too weak to keep the country secure.”

The last American ambassador murdered at his post was Adolph Dubs in Kabul in 1979. Guess who was president? That's right, Jimmy Carter, the original international symbol of American weakness.

Now Carter moves up a notch to second worse president in U.S. history.

Two months earlier, Stevens notified the departments of Homeland Security and Justice about increasing violence against western interests in Libya:

“Islamic extremism appears to be on the rise in eastern Libya,” the ambassador wrote, adding that “the Al-Qaeda flag has been spotted several times flying over government buildings and training facilities …”

Only problem: Obama wasn't listening and isn't inclined to.

After he took office, Obama replaced the "war on terror" with the vague "overseas contingency operations."

He characterized the Fort Hood murders of 13 Americans, and one unborn child, as "workplace violence." This, despite the shooter, Major Nidal Hassan, shouting Allah-Akbar as he gunned down his fellow soldiers.

Hassan still has not faced justice three years after his dastardly act.

The mastermind of 9/11, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, responsible for the deaths of 3,000 Americans, likewise has not paid for his crime and sits in an air-conditioned cell at Guantanamo, paid for by the American taxpayer.

Radical Islamists linked to the Muslim Brotherhood, Hamas and Hezbollah made hundreds of visits to the White House since Obama's election. The Investigative Project on Terrorism found those visitors had:

Been designated by the Department of Justice as unindicted co-conspirators in terrorist trials; Extolled Islamic terrorist groups including Hamas and Hizballah

Obstructed terrorist investigations by instructing their followers not to cooperate with law enforcement;

Promoted the incendiary conspiratorial allegation that the United States is engaged in a “war against Islam”— a leading tool in recruiting Muslims to carry out acts of terror

Repeatedly claimed that many of the Islamic terrorists convicted since 9-11 were framed by the U.S government as part of an anti-Muslim profiling campaign.

Obama famously said the Muslim call to prayer was "one of the prettiest sounds on Earth as sunset."

No wonder Obama blocks all our attempts on domestic oil and natural gas production. He's rather get oil from our friends in the middle east. A supply that can and is often manipulated by nations hostile to us.

Does Obama sound like a guy with the temperament to take it to Jihadists working our demise? After all, this is the American president who bowed to the Saudi king.

Disgraceful. Earth to Obama, Americans bow down to no one or nation.

That's why you, Mr Obama, will get shelved on November 6 and go back to the anonymity you want and richly deserve.

The Ad Every American Should See

2012-10-13T23:10:00.001-07:00

Lets all get together on Nov 6 and bid Comrade Obama a not so fond, Dasvidaniya.

Obama's "Tough Day": America's Tough Four Years

2012-09-14T09:14:00.000-07:00

Your embassy and consulate are violated, and four of your diplomats killed...so what do you do?

If you're Barack Obama you go to Vegas and campaign. Also, you whine about what a tough day you've had.

Actually, its been more like a tough presidency. Everything Obama touches turns bad. If you're one of his deluded sheep, fear not. The Campaigner-in-Chief is doing just fine.

For the rest us of not on welfare and food stamps, its been a non-stop crap-a-rama of declining incomes and rising food and gas prices.

The president is so befuddled at the failure of his ~~capitulation~~ outreach to Muslims he can't decide if Egypt is friend or foe.

Even Jimmy Carter rose from the dead, again, contradicted Obama, saying "Egypt is an ally of the US, we know Egypt well."

After all, Carter is uniquely qualified to give Obama advice since the last U.S. ambassador butchered by Islamists (practitioners of the religion of peace) happened under his watch.

Still for Obama, commupenstance from Carter is like the coolest kid in school getting an atomic wedgie from the biggest nerd on the chess team.

Speaking of atomic wedgies, Israel's prime minister can't get an audience with Obama to coordinate an Iran response. The leader of the free world does have time to appear on Letterman, however.

If Americans aren't embarrassed and humiliated by the fraud in the White House, there's little hope of our long-term survival as a nation.

In Obama and the democrats we gave the keys to the country to perpetual 17 year-olds. They're such losers that at the Democrat National Convention even God was booed. And in what must rank as one of the greatest acts of buffoonery ever, a salute to American servicemen featured Russian warships on the big screen.

Maybe that's by design. Recall Obama was caught on open mic promising Russian president Medvedev "more flexibility" on missile defense.

If America had crown jewels Obama would be giving them away; something the last U.S. taxpayer standing should consider when thinking about the president's salary and generous pension plan.

That and 17 trillion dollars in debt.

Contemplate that on the tree of woe.

Martin Dempsey: An Officer and a Stooge

2012-09-13T08:29:00.002-07:00

The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff has called an American citizen with guidance about his 1st Amendment rights under the Constitution of the United States:

Gen. Martin Dempsey called yesterday Terry Jones, who is known for inflammatory anti-Islamic rhetoric, to express his concerns about the film, saying it could inflame tensions and trigger violence.

I guess the butchering of four Americans, including our ambassador to Libya, as well as breaching our embassy in Cairo and burning the Stars and Stripes, is not inflammatory?

Mitt Romney, who appropriately expressed outrage at the loss of life and violations of sovereign U.S. territory, was quickly made the fall guy by an enraged media.

Seems even Obama's disastrous "leading from behind" policy in the Middle East, and all its bitter fruit, are beyond criticism for a media that no longer even pretends to be objective.

Like most Americans, Romney was annoyed by the conciliatory and defeatist messages coming from the State Department. Obama was quick to criticize Romney for "shooting first and aiming later."

It came from people on the ground, who are potentially in danger," Obama said. "You know, my tendency is to cut folks a little bit of slack when they're in that circumstance, rather than try to question their judgment from the comfort of a campaign office.

Today the Drudge Report posted a link to a 2008 YouTube video with then senator Obama faulting McCain and Bush for U.S. war deaths. All from the comfort of a campaign office.

But back to the Chairman Dempsey: Our cemeteries are full of patriots who paid the ultimate price for the freedoms we enjoy as Americans.

And unlike you, those men and women did not sell themselves cheap to some political hack.

America's Veterans to Obama: Get Lost!

2012-09-13T07:20:00.000-07:00

We're all part of a Banana Republic, er, Government, Now

2012-09-07T12:24:00.002-07:00

El Jefe

The wife's been bugging me for a power of attorney. With my extended work trips abroad, she needs the flexibility to take care of business while I'm gone, or if I cash in prematurely.

Hoping for a phone number to check office hours at the local army base, a google search got me several numbers, all wrong. I finally clicked on the Judge Advocate General (JAG) web site.

The legal assistance pull down menu gets you the standard and useless mission statement, office location (which I already knew) and driving directions.

No phone number.

I clicked on the directory menu. Nothing visible after criminal law. Need to scroll down but cannot without a common access card (CAC) to navigate the site. (I might need criminal law after all, should I run across the web site builder.)

Dreading what was to come, I went to legal assistance anyway.

I knew the place well from my time on active duty. There were soldiers, milling about, filling out forms. This must still be the place.

At the welcome desk there was a small sign, with an arrow for the direction impaired, that powers of attorney were handled down the hall, first door on the right.

When I got to the first door on the right, there was another sign, with requisite arrow pointing back the way I came, indicating the services I sought were handled in the office with the first sign. No doubt this all arranged by a JAG officer hopped up on Sun Tzu:

Engage people with what they expect; it is what they are able to discern and confirms their projections. It settles them into predictable patterns of response, occupying their minds while you wait for the extraordinary moment — that which they cannot anticipate.

The eager captain behind the desk handed me a list of 50 or so conditions that I needed to check off to be covered by my special power of attorney.

"Isn't there a general power of attorney, like the one I got several years ago, that covers all this?"

"The banks won't accept general powers of attorney anymore."

Seems as though troops deploying to Afghanistan have gotten into all sorts of money troubles. The average 18-25 year old soldier, and their spouses, are just as financially immature as other young Americans. More than a few soldiers saw bank accounts drained by unscrupulous loved ones while serving in a combat zone.

A tragedy? No, that's not how a government bureaucrat thinks. Another opportunity to enfeeble his constituents and enlarge his domain. You know, let no crisis go to waste.

So I checked off about 20 items I wanted covered and several minutes later a private came out with 20 pieces of paper.

"Sir, please fill in your name and your wife's name on these forms, but don't sign until you're in the notary's office."

"You mean all of these documents need to be notarized? Individually??"

What was once covered in two pages, now takes twenty.

If there is an epithet for American exceptionalism it can be found in the uncontrollable growth of our sclerotic bureaucracy: Cops busting lemonade stands; prosecuting teachers for hugging students while the TSA gropes 3 year olds; permits for every conceivable device that can be taxed to fund ever more bureaucrats.

If you believe that we all belong to government, like Obama and his deluded sheep believe, then you've already ceded control of your life to others.

And that extraordinary moment of Sun Tzu's will come. For many it will be on their deathbed, denied that life saving procedure by some faceless Obamacrat. Or possibly when a mother finds herself imprisoned for criticizing the local caudillo, busted by her own ten year old daughter in casual conversation with the neighbor you had barbeque with yesterday.

In that moment you'll realize that you are a slave, long ago trading freedom for security. What could be less American.

As the private returned to his office I asked, "Is there some guy with a bus driver's hat, sunglasses and a moustache getting a cut of all this?"

"Sir?"

"Never mind, I already know the answer. Thanks for your help."

When my wife saw the stack of forms she laughed. "I'll call my sister," she said, as she trashed the lot.

On its way is a two page general power of attorney, made possible by other than government means.

Obama Fail in Texas

2012-08-10T23:26:00.002-07:00

Don't mess with them.

If You've Got a Book, You Didn't Write That: Somebody Else Made That Happen

2012-07-19T13:48:00.001-07:00

“I've written two books,” Barack Obama told a crowd of teachers in July of 2008. “I actually wrote them myself.”

Bill Ayers was unavailable for comment.

White House Announces Higgs Boson Now Obama Boson

2012-07-05T11:46:00.000-07:00

In a not so surprising move, the Obama Administration took credit for discovery of the Higgs boson, the last missing piece in what's called the Standard Model, the accepted theory of particle physics.

At an impromptu White House press conference, President Obama, dodging questions about the economy and Eric Holder, dismissed claims of the CERN Research center saying that he discovered himself to be the boson during his tenure as a visiting physics professor at the University of Chicago:

You know, it was tough teaching constitutional law while lecturing in physics at the same time. Lab time was scarce, I mean, I had all these "New Party" community meetings to attend.

When Daily Caller reporter Neil Munro pointed out that the existence of the boson was first postulated by British physicist Peter Higgs in 1964, Obama explained that he was born then in either Kenya or Hawaii, and said, "It wasn't a coincidence that David Letterman, then at Corning Labs, named me the 'God particle' at the time." Obama continued:

Who but me could Leatherman have referred to. I mean, I'm the light bringer here. This thing has a mass 125 times that of a proton, and we all know that I'm way bigger than a proton.

I've called Professor Higgins and he's cool with the name change.

For CERN, the elusive boson has come slowly into view since last winter, as evidence of its existence grew until they practically jumped off the chart. A scientist at CERN who requested anonymity, dismissed Obama's claim:

I realize that President Obama may be the smartest man to ever be U.S. president, but this is rocket science and I doubt Obama knows the difference between a particle and particle board.

After all, this is the same guy who needs a teleprompter to talk to 6th graders.

With an election coming up, the president is not backing down. As independents, the young and southern democrats desert him, Obama desperately needs the egghead vote.

Fondly noting his most rewarding moments as the first black physics professor at the University of Chicago, Obama confided:

It's like I used to tell all of my new students: Out with the old, in with the nucleus.

Good advice for November.

Social Security: Every Day's Independence Day

2012-07-04T14:53:00.000-07:00

This item passed on from a conservative network of liberty loving patriots...

The U.S. government would like us all to forget that Social Security was once “OUR MONEY__OUR SAVINGS" - but in “THEIR” account. That same government pilfered the fruits of our labor and dole a small fraction of that back to us, and expect our eternal gratitude.

SOCIAL SECURITY NOW CALLED 'FEDERAL BENEFIT PAYMENT'/ENTITLEMENT!

Have you noticed, your Social Security check is now referred to as a "federal benefit payment?"

I'll be part of the one percent, to forward this, our government gets away with way too much in all areas of our lives, while they live lavishly on their grossly overpaid incomes! KEEP passing THIS AROUND UNTIL EVERY ONE HAS READ IT.....

This was sent to me, I am forwarding it because it does touch a nerve in me.

Remember, not only did you contribute to Social Security but your employer did too. It totaled 15% of your income before taxes. If you averaged only $30K over your working life, that's close to $220,500.

If you calculate the future value of $4,500 per year (yours & your employer's contribution) at a simple 5% (less than what the government pays on the money that it borrows), after 49 years of working you'd have $892,919.98.

If you took out only 3% per year, you'd receive $26,787.60 per year and it would last better than 30 years (until you're 95 if you retire at age 65) and that's with no interest paid on that final amount on deposit! If you bought an annuity and it paid 4% per year, you'd have a lifetime income of $2,976.40 per month.

Entitlement my ass, I paid cash for my social security insurance! Just because they borrowed the money, doesn't make my benefits some kind of charity or handout!

Congressional benefits ---- free healthcare, outrageous retirement packages, 67 paid holidays, three weeks paid vacation, unlimited paid sick days, now that's welfare, and politician have the nerve to call my social security retirement entitlements?

We're "broke" and can't help our own Seniors, Veterans, Orphans, Homeless.

In the last months we have provided aid to Haiti, Chile, and Turkey. And now Pakistan... hideout of bin Laden. Literally, BILLIONS of DOLLARS!!! We annually give billions to Egypt, a hotbed of anti-Christian Islamic fundamentalism.

Our retired seniors living on a 'fixed income' receive no aid nor do they get any breaks while our government and religious organizations pour Hundreds of Billions of $s and Tons of Food to Foreign Countries!

They call Social Security and Medicare an entitlement even though most of us have been paying for it all our working lives and now when it’s time for us to collect, the government is running out of money. Why did the government borrow from it in the first place? Imagine if the *GOVERNMENT* gave 'US' the same support they give to other countries.

Sad isn't it?

Remember this on our Independence Day and vote this November to oust the parasite class that's affixed itself to America.

World War III Axis Forms

2012-06-19T10:49:00.000-07:00

Not something you'll read first in the U.S. media. Syria has joined Iran, Russia and China in planning the "biggest ever war games in the Middle East":

Largest joint exercise in Mideast history, reportedly involving troops, tanks, planes and even Russian nuclear subs, set to take place within a month along Syrian coast

Call it the fruits of "smart diplomacy."

Large scale military exercises by countries hostile to the United States haven't occurred since those halcyon days of the Warsaw Pact. The only ones missing are north Korea.

Got the square halo going!

Meanwhile at the G20 summit in Baja, our president bows to Mexican president Felipe Calderon, continuing the national humiliation Obama began by bowing to the Saudi dictator.

You'd think Calderon would bow to Obama given the huge population pressure relief value just provided him by our chief executive's wholesale flouting of the U.S. constitution and illegal alien amnesty.

As usual, Obama's foreign policy can be summed up as, It shall be in the interest of the United States to not act in the interest of the United States.

Mexican presidents always expect the U.S. to automatically cede security and sovereignty to accommodate pathologies and incompetence south of the border.

If Obama gets another term, look for those illegals to start streaming back. Having lived in a banana republic, they'll know one when they see one.

Either that or just continue north to Canada. Their economic growth is outpacing our; not much of a surprise considering our current, um, leadership.

At the summit, Obama got schooled by Vladimir Putin on foreign policy. Putin holds Obama in such high regard that he didn't bother to hide Russian attack helicopter support to Syria.

It follows that comprehensive war games aimed at the U.S. would follow. Not that you'll hear anything about this new axis of evil from a president that never met a dictator he couldn't bow to, or an ally he couldn't burn.

On the bright side, the Queen does have all of Obama's speeches on iPod.

And how prepared are we to confront the emerging alliance against us?

Not very.

Through sheer incompetence and ideology, Obama's added $5 trillion to the deficit. Middle class wealth is down 40%. The political climate is more divisive than ever; quite a feat for the first post-partisan president.

And the military?

Funding cuts to DoD amount to almost a trillion dollars. The Pentagon will soon host a gay pride month, completely predictable following the repeal of DADT. The service chiefs are daily browbeaten about diversity in the ranks and green energy. The only way to take down the U.S. military is from within, and that's happening at an alarming pace.

Call it suicide by political correctness.

The hipster doofus Navy Secretary, Ray Mabus, buys biodiesel for the fleet at eight times the cost of regular fuel. (Don't we have a budget shortfall?) He also has a strange habit of naming ships after Marxist community organizers. Remember the USS Cesar Chavez?

Is the USS Obama far behind?

Our military retains many advantages, but even these are squandered for short term political gain. Obama's administration is completely transparent in one area: giving away classified information.

Whether it's outing SEALs after the bin Laden raid, talking up the president's role in drone assassinations, or touting highly sensitive offensive computer attack capabilities, White House drones spare no expense, or transient military advantage, to get the president re-elected.

That October election surprise just might be the full flowering of a block of nations dedicated to overtly rolling back U.S. influence in the world.

Smart diplomacy indeed.

When Even Dear Abby Was Speechless!

2012-06-18T13:26:00.002-07:00

Dear Abby,

A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid twenties. These two women go everywhere together, and I've never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese?
----------------------------------

Dear Abby,

What can I do about all the Sex, Nudity, Fowl Language and Violence on my VCR?
----------------------------------

Dear Abby,

I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his.
----------------------------------

Dear Abby,

I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.
----------------------------------

Dear Abby,

I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around, and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again.
-----------------------------------

Dear Abby,

Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?
------------------------------------

Dear Abby,

I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?
------------------------------------

Dear Abby,

My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an hour every week for two and a half years. He must be crazy.
-------------------------------------

Dear Abby,

I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.
--------------------------------------

Dear Abby,

My mother is mean and short tempered I think she is going through mental pause.
--------------------------------------

Dear Abby,

You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?
---------------------------------------

H/T Mike Staves

Reasons 57-60 to Send Obama Packing

2012-06-15T08:29:00.000-07:00

57. Russia sends attack helicopters to support Syrian butcher Assad. No mention of "smart" foreign policy or "reset" lately.

58. Obama's Ohio speech bombs. No new thinking just rehashed cliches and references to failed policy initiatives, like putting more government workers on the dole to fix the economy.

59. Pentagon announces gay pride month for the military.

60. Obama circumvents Congress, the law and the U.S. constitution by announcing immunity from deportation for young illegal immigrants. Don't hold your breath waiting for Boehner to initiate impeachment proceedings.

More Fruits of DADT Repeal

2012-06-14T12:05:00.001-07:00

Another sign the apocalypse is upon us, the Pentagon is set to honor gay troops:

Officials said Thursday that they’re planning the first-ever event to recognize gay and lesbian troops. They declined to give details about what the event will be, but officials said Defense Secretary Leon Panetta feels it’s important to recognize the service of gays in the armed forces.

Seemingly the most respected of American institutions, the military, cannot resist the balkanizing influences of political correctness.

Soon to follow: floors and ceilings on schools and promotion boards mandating that gays are promoted equally with other protected minortities and genders. (Don't think that a transgender category is far off, unless Americans stop progressive social experimentation on the U.S. military.)

Britain was the first nation to commit suicide by political correctness. Will the United States be second?

By the way, Happy 237th Birthday U.S. Army.

War and the Limits of Compassion

2012-06-14T10:35:00.002-07:00

Janet Levy, writing on North Korean Prison camps for the American Thinker notes:

The question has been asked many times: "Why didn't the Allies bomb the death camps or at least the railway lines leading to Auschwitz?" According to classified papers released in 1978, American and British governments knew what was happening to the Jews in Europe and ignored the pleas of rabbis and others to destroy the Nazis' means of transporting Jews to their deaths. The Allies were already bombing within a mile of the camp at the time, and yet nothing was done to stop the daily incineration of 20,000 people at Auschwitz. Tragically, fighter pilots with excess, unused bombs from nearby bombing sorties dumped them into the North Sea to lighten their return trip.

Today, a similar situation exists in North Korea. Thanks to satellite images and eyewitness accounts, we know that approximately 200,000 men, women, and children are enduring enslavement, starvation, and torture in that country's gulags. Few survivors are ever released, and only one who was born and raised in a prison camp is known to have escaped. His name is Shin Dong-hyuk, and he is now a human rights activist.

So then, "What is to be done?"

First, wondering why the allies didn't bomb Nazi death camps is a classic case of misplaced compassion and proof thinking morally is no substitute for thinking rationally.

The United States alone had twelve million under arms to fight the Nazis and Japanese in two theaters. Ground combat was a virtual death sentence for those assigned to front line units. Daily bombing campaigns over Europe resulted in the loss of thousands of U.S. and British airmen. The war effort resulted in the greatest industrial output in history. Rationing and sacrifice at home sustained the total war effort.

Four hundred and five thousand U.S. combat deaths and millions maimed and crippled during World War II... to say that nothing was done to stop the daily incineration at Auschwitz is a cosmic insult to those who fought.

In Europe, Eisenhower had one concern: to win the war quickly, preserving as many U.S. lives as possible. Towards that end targets were picked for the greatest effect on the enemy's will and capacity to wage war. Why assume any other approach?

Targeting occupied Europe was a precise affair with detailed planning and choreography to ensure greatest mission success and crew survival. German fighters and flak were deadly. Imagine a pilot with bombs left over saying, "Well, we got the ball bearing plant at Schweinfurt, I'll just start freelancing and fly over Dachau and bomb the railroad"??

Sorry, doesn't work that way. Given the imprecision of bombing at the time, efforts to help concentration camp inmates would likely resulted in their deaths while doing little damage to the German war effort.

Certainly senior allied leaders knew about the Holocaust. They and their staffs, immersed in the realities of total war against a formidable enemy, made decisions they believed would end the conflict quickly.

Likewise the problems in ending the north Korea gulag are many and intractable.

Urging "awareness" on folks is nice but no real relief. Tyrants and despots seem remarkably immune to moral posturing. Sanctions haven't worked for 60 years and north Korea remains a buffer state for China and Russia against U.S. influence in northeast Asia. And those controlling the levers that move Kim Jong-Un seem nonplussed by the gulag.

Perhaps more meaningful action is necessary. For example, this post was written on an iMac made in China. Do I refuse to buy Apple because production is outsourced to supporters of the Kim regime? Or should I tell my representative to force Apple to move its facilities to more democratic climes?

That certainly clashes with my free market, small government impulses. At least congress can stop sending money to north Korea; about $1 billion in the last ten years or so, most of it blackmailed from wussies like Jimmy Carter, Bill Clinton and Madeline Albright.

Surprised? You shouldn't be. Look at the alternative, the perennial threat of war north Korea trots out like a show pony whenever a harvest fails and the regime needs oil to keep its primitive infrastructure going.

This is also a regime with a million man army and several nuclear devices. It has the twelve million residents of Seoul targeted with rockets and artillery. Regime change is problematic.

That's why hope and change should never be in the same sentence. Real change means bold decisions and risk taking, not just wishing it were so and ignoring the realities on the ground.

When liberation for twenty million north Koreans comes it will be by the barrel of a gun. Who's gun is anyones guess.

My guess is that is won't be a progressives'. We all know they hate guns. However, that won't stop them from basking in the glory, taking credit anyway...

Just like Obama's uncle who liberated Auschwitz.

File this under Dreams from my Red Uncle, since the Red Army liberated Auschwitz.

Neal Boortz's Texas A&M Commencement Speech

2012-06-13T11:16:00.002-07:00

Neil Boortz is a nationally syndicated talk show host out of Atlanta, and a Texas A&M graduate.

I'm certain the faculty got more than they bargained for with this honorary degree...

"I am honored by the invitation to address you on this august occasion. It's about time. Be warned, however, that I am not here to impress you; you'll have enough smoke blown up your bloomers today. And you can bet your tassels I'm not here to impress the faculty and administration. You may not like much of what I have to say, and that's fine. You will remember it though. Especially after about 10 years out there in the real world. This, it goes without saying, does not apply to those of you who will seek your careers and your fortunes as government employees.

This gowned gaggle behind me is your faculty. You've heard the old saying that those who can - do. Those who can't - teach. That sounds deliciously insensitive. But there is often raw truth in insensitivity, just as you often find feel-good falsehoods and lies in compassion. Say good-bye to your faculty because now you are getting ready to go out there and do. These folks behind me are going to stay right here and teach.

By the way, just because you are leaving this place with a diploma doesn't mean the learning is over. When an FAA flight examiner handed me my private pilot's license many years ago, he said, “Here, this is your ticket to learn.” The same can be said for your diploma. Believe me, the learning has just begun.

Now, I realize that most of you consider yourselves Liberals. In fact, you are probably very proud of your liberal views. You care so much. You feel so much. You want to help so much. After all, you're a compassionate and caring person, aren't you now? Well, isn't that just so extraordinarily special. Now, at this age, is as good a time as any to be a liberal; as good a time as any to know absolutely everything. You have plenty of time, starting tomorrow, for the truth to set in.

Over the next few years, as you begin to feel the cold breath of reality down your neck, things are going to start changing pretty fast... Including your own assessment of just how much you really know.

So here are the first assignments for your initial class in reality: Pay attention to the news, read newspapers, and listen to the words and phrases that proud Liberals use to promote their causes. Then, compare the words of the left to the words and phrases you hear from those evil, heartless, greedy conservatives. From the Left you will hear "I feel." From the Right you will hear "I think." From the Liberals you will hear references to groups -- The Blacks, the Poor, the Rich, the Disadvantaged, the Less Fortunate. From the Right you will hear references to individuals. On the Left you hear talk of group rights; on the Right, individual rights.

That about sums it up, really: Liberals feel. Liberals care. They are pack animals whose identity is tied up in group dynamics. Conservatives think -- and, setting aside the theocracy crowd, their identity is centered on the individual. Liberals feel that their favored groups have enforceable rights to the property and services of productive individuals.

Conservatives, I among them I might add, think that individuals have the right to protect their lives and their property from the plunder of the masses. In college you developed a group mentality, but if you look closely at your diplomas you will see that they have your individual names on them. Not the name of your school mascot, or of your fraternity or sorority, but your name. Your group identity is going away. Your recognition and appreciation of your individual identity starts now.

If, by the time you reach the age of 30, you do not consider yourself to be a conservative, rush right back here as quickly as you can and apply for a faculty position. These people will welcome you with open arms. They will welcome you, that is, so long as you haven't developed an individual identity. Once again you will have to be willing to sign on to the group mentality you embraced during the past four years.

Something is going to happen soon that is going to really open your eyes. You're going to actually get a full time job! You're also going to get a lifelong work partner. This partner isn't going to help you do your job. This partner is just going to sit back and wait for payday. This partner doesn't want to share in your effort, but in your earnings.

Your new lifelong partner is actually an agent; an agent representing a strange and diverse group of people; an agent for every teenager with an illegitimate child; an agent for a research scientist who wanted to make some cash answering the age-old question of why monkeys grind their teeth. An agent for some poor demented hippie who considers herself to be a meaningful and talented artist, but who just can't manage to sell any of her artwork on the open market.

Your new partner is an agent for every person with limited, if any, job skills, but who wanted a job at City Hall. An agent for tin-horn dictators in fancy military uniforms grasping for American foreign aid. An agent for multi-million dollar companies who want someone else to pay for their overseas advertising. An agent for everybody who wants to use the unimaginable power of this agent's for their personal enrichment and benefit.

That agent is our wonderful, caring, compassionate, oppressive government. Believe me, you will be awed by the unimaginable power this agent has. Power that you do not have. A power that no individual has, or will have. This agent has the legal power to use force, deadly force to accomplish its goals.

You have no choice here. Your new friend is just going to walk up to you, introduce itself rather gruffly, hand you a few forms to fill out, and move right on in. Say hello to your own personal one ton gorilla. It will sleep anywhere it wants to.

Now, let me tell you, this agent is not cheap. As you become successful it will seize about 40% of everything you earn. And no, I'm sorry, there just isn't any way you can fire this agent of plunder, and you can't decrease its share of your income. That power rests with him, not you.

So, here I am saying negative things to you about government. Well, be clear on this: It is not wrong to distrust government. It is not wrong to fear government. In certain cases it is not even wrong to despise government for government is inherently evil. Yes, a necessary evil, but dangerous nonetheless, somewhat like a drug. Just as a drug that in the proper dosage can save your life, an overdose of government can be fatal.

Now let's address a few things that have been crammed into your minds at this university. There are some ideas you need to expunge as soon as possible. These ideas may work well in academic environment, but they fail miserably out there in the real world.

First is that favorite buzz word of the media and academia: Diversity! You have been taught that the real value of any group of people - be it a social group, an employee group, a management group, whatever - is based on diversity. This is a favored liberal ideal because diversity is based not on an individuals abilities or character, but on a person's identity and status as a member of a group. Yes, it's that liberal group identity thing again.

Within the great diversity movement group identification - be it racial, gender based, or some other minority status - means more than the individuals integrity, character or other qualifications.

Brace yourself. You are about to move from this academic atmosphere where diversity rules, to a workplace and a culture where individual achievement and excellence actually count. No matter what your professors have taught you over the last four years, you are about to learn that diversity is absolutely no replacement for excellence, ability, and individual hard work. From this day on every single time you hear the word "diversity" you can rest assured that there is someone close by who is determined to rob you of every vestige of individuality you possess.

We also need to address this thing you seem to have about "rights." We have witnessed an obscene explosion of so-called "rights" in the last few decades, usually emanating from college campuses. You know the mantra: You have the right to a job. The right to a place to live. The right to a living wage. The right to health care. The right to an education. You probably even have your own pet right - the right to a Beemer for instance, or the right to have someone else provide for that child you plan on downloading in a year or so.

Forget it. Forget those rights! I'll tell you what your rights are. You have a right to live free, and to the results of 60% -75% of your labor. I'll also tell you have no right to any portion of the life or labor of another.

You may, for instance, think that you have a right to health care. After all, President Obama said so, didn't he? But you cannot receive health-care unless some doctor or health practitioner surrenders some of his time - his life - to you. He may be willing to do this for compensation, but that's his choice. You have no "right" to his time or property. You have no right to his or any other person's life or to any portion thereof.

You may also think you have some "right" to a job; a job with a living wage, whatever that is. Do you mean to tell me that you have a right to force your services on another person, and then the right to demand that this person compensate you with their money?

Sorry, forget it. I am sure you would scream if some urban outdoors men (that would be "homeless person" for those of you who don't want to give these less fortunate people a romantic and adventurous title) came to you and demanded his job and your money.

The people who have been telling you about all the rights you have are simply exercising one of theirs - the right to be imbeciles. Their being imbeciles didn't cost anyone else either property or time. It's their right, and they exercise it brilliantly.

By the way, did you catch my use of the phrase "less fortunate" a bit ago when I was talking about the urban outdoors men? That phrase is a favorite of the Left. Think about it, and you'll understand why.

To imply that one person is homeless, destitute, dirty, drunk, spaced out on drugs, unemployable, and generally miserable because he is "less fortunate" is to imply that a successful person - one with a job, a home and a future - is in that position because he or she was "fortunate." The dictionary says that fortunate means "having derived good from an unexpected place." There is nothing unexpected about deriving good from hard work. There is also nothing unexpected about deriving misery from choosing drugs, alcohol, and the street.

If the Liberal Left can create the common perception that success and failure are simple matters of "fortune" or "luck," then it is easy to promote and justify their various income redistribution schemes. After all, we are just evening out the odds a little bit. This "success equals luck" idea the liberals like to push is seen everywhere. Former Democratic presidential candidate Richard Gephardt refers to high-achievers as "people who have won life's lottery." He wants you to believe they are making the big bucks because they are lucky. It's not luck, my friends. It's choice.

One of the greatest lessons I ever learned was in a book by Og Mandino, entitled, "The Greatest Secret in the World." The lesson? Very simple: "Use wisely your power of choice."

That bum sitting on a heating grate, smelling like a wharf rat? He's there by choice. He is there because of the sum total of the choices he has made in his life. This truism is absolutely the hardest thing for some people to accept, especially those who consider themselves to be victims of something or other - victims of discrimination, bad luck, the system, capitalism, whatever. After all, nobody really wants to accept the blame for his or her position in life. Not when it is so much easier to point and say, "Look! He did this to me!" than it is to look into a mirror and say, "You S. O. B.! You did this to me!"

The key to accepting responsibility for your life is to accept the fact that your choices, every one of them, are leading you inexorably to either success or failure, however you define those terms.

Some of the choices are obvious: Whether or not to stay in school. Whether or not to get pregnant. Whether or not to hit the bottle. Whether or not to keep this job you hate until you get another better-paying job. Whether or not to save some of your money, or saddle yourself with huge payments for that new car.

Some of the choices are seemingly insignificant: Whom to go to the movies with. Whose car to ride home in. Whether to watch the tube tonight, or read a book on investing. But, and you can be sure of this, each choice counts. Each choice is a building block - some large, some small.

But each one is a part of the structure of your life. If you make the right choices, or if you make more right choices than wrong ones, something absolutely terrible may happen to you. Something unthinkable. You, my friend, could become one of the hated, the evil, the ugly, the feared, the filthy, the successful, the rich.

The rich basically serve two purposes in this country. First, they provide the investments, the investment capital, and the brains for the formation of new businesses. Businesses that hire people. Businesses that send millions of paychecks home each week to the un-rich.

Second, the rich are a wonderful object of ridicule, distrust, and hatred. Few things are more valuable to a politician than the envy most Americans feel for the evil rich. Envy is a powerful emotion. Even more powerful than the emotional minefield that surrounded Bill Clinton when he reviewed his last batch of White House interns. Politicians use envy to get votes and power.

And they keep that power by promising the envious that the envied will be punished: "The rich will pay their fair share of taxes if I have anything to do with it." The truth is that the top 10% of income earners in this country pays almost 50% of all income taxes collected.

I shudder to think what these job producers would be paying if our tax system were any more "fair."

You have heard, no doubt, that the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. Interestingly enough, our government's own numbers show that many of the poor actually get richer, and that quite a few of the rich actually get poorer. But for the rich who do actually get richer, and the poor who remain poor .. there's an explanation -- a reason.

The rich, you see, keep doing the things that make them rich; while the poor keep doing the things that make them poor.

Speaking of the poor, during your adult life you are going to hear an endless string of politicians bemoaning the plight of the poor. So, you need to know that under our government's definition of "poor" you can have a $5 million net worth, a $300,000 home and a new $90,000 Mercedes, all completely paid for. You can also have a maid, cook, and valet, and a million in your checking account, and you can still be officially defined by our government as "living in poverty."

Now there's something you haven't seen on the evening news. How does the government pull this one off? Very simple, really. To determine whether or not some poor soul is "living in poverty," the government measures one thing -- just one thing. Income.

It doesn't matter one bit how much you have, how much you own, how many cars you drive or how big they are, whether or not your pool is heated, whether you winter in Aspen and spend the summers in the Bahamas, or how much is in your savings account. It only matters how much income you claim in that particular year. This means that if you take a one-year leave of absence from your high-paying job and decide to live off the money in your savings and checking accounts while you write the next great American novel, the government says you are living in poverty."

This isn't exactly what you had in mind when you heard these gloomy statistics, is it? Do you need more convincing? Try this. The government's own statistics show that people who are said to be "living in poverty" spend more than $1.50 for each dollar of income they claim.

Something is a bit fishy here. Just remember all this the next time Charles Gibson tells you about some hideous new poverty statistics. Why has the government concocted this phony poverty scam? Because the government needs an excuse to grow and to expand its social welfare programs, which translates into an expansion of its power.

If the government can convince you, in all your compassion, that the number of "poor" is increasing, it will have all the excuse it needs to sway an electorate suffering from the advanced stages of Obsessive-Compulsive Compassion Disorder.

I'm about to be stoned by the faculty here. They've already changed their minds about that honorary degree I was going to get. That's OK, though. I still have my PhD. in Insensitivity from the Neal Boortz Institute for Insensitivity Training.

I learned that, in short, sensitivity sucks. It's a trap. Think about it - the truth knows no sensitivity. Life can be insensitive. Wallow too much in sensitivity and you'll be unable to deal with life, or the truth, so get over it.

Now, before the dean has me shackled and hauled off, I have a few random thoughts:

You need to register to vote, unless you are on welfare. If you are living off the efforts of others, please do us the favor of sitting down and shutting up until you are on your own again.

When you do vote, your votes for the House and the Senate are more important than your vote for President. The House controls the purse strings, so concentrate your awareness there.

Liars cannot be trusted, even when the liar is the President of the country. If someone can't deal honestly with you, send them packing.

Don't bow to the temptation to use the government as an instrument of plunder. If it is wrong for you to take money from someone else who earned it -- to take their money by force for your own needs -- then it is certainly just as wrong for you to demand that the government step forward and do this dirty work for you.

Don't look in other people's pockets. You have no business there. What they earn is theirs. What you earn is yours. Keep it that way.

Nobody owes you anything, except to respect your privacy and your rights, and leave you the hell alone.

Speaking of earning, the revered 40-hour workweek is for losers. Forty hours should be considered the minimum, not the maximum. You don't see highly successful people clocking out of the office every afternoon at five. The losers are the ones caught up in that afternoon rush hour. The winners drive home in the dark.

Free speech is meant to protect unpopular speech. Popular speech, by definition, needs no protection.

Finally (and aren't you glad to hear that word), as Og Mandino wrote:

Proclaim your rarity. Each of you is a rare and unique human being.

Use wisely your power of choice.

Go the extra mile, drive home in the dark.
Oh, and put off buying a television set as long as you can. Now, if you have any idea at all what's good for you, you will get out of here and never come back.

Class dismissed.

(The students gave a standing ovation; the faculty were deathly silent! )

Something to offend Everyone!

2012-06-06T07:35:00.000-07:00

I'd just come out of the shop with a meat and potato pie, large chips, mushy peas & a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man sat there and said 'I've not eaten for two days.' I told him, 'I wish I had your will power.'
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A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunch time. She said 'sorry about the wait.' I said, 'Don't worry, you'll find a way to lose it eventually '
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I walked past a stoner kid sitting at a bus stop as I went into the bank. When I came out, he looked at me and said 'Any Change?' I said, 'Nope, you’re still here.'
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Snow in the forecast and the TV weather gal said she was expecting 8 inches tonight. I thought to myself, 'fat chance,' with a face like that!
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A 10 year old Irish boy stands crying at the side of the road. A man passing by asks 'What's wrong, lad?' The boy says 'Me ma died this morning.' 'Oh bejaysus,' The man says. 'Do you want me to call Father O’Riley for you?' The boy replies, 'No tanks mister, sex is the last ting on me mind at the moment.'
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Years ago it was suggested that an apple a day kept the doctor away. But since most doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich works best!
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Japanese scientists have now created a camera with such a fantastic shutter speed that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman with her mouth closed.
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I hate all this terrorist business. I used to love the days when you could look at an unattended bag on a train or bus and think to yourself...'I’m going to take that.'
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Man in a hot air balloon is lost over Ireland. He looks down and sees a farmer in the fields and shouts to him Where am I? The Irish farmer looks back up and shouts back. ‘You’re in that basket.’
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I had a big lead in a trivia competition at a local bar until the last question which I got wrong. The question was, Where do women have the curliest hair? Fiji was the correct answer...hell, how did I know they wanted the name of a country?

H/T Mike Staves

Polish Death Camps and other Obamanations

2012-05-30T11:19:00.003-07:00

President Obama's latest "misspeak," this one concerning Polish death camps, instead of Nazi death camps in Poland, continues the slow-motion train wreck that is his re-election campaign. For all but die-hard, Obama kool-aid drinkers, it's increasingly obvious the U.S. is led by an ignorant, untalented clown, pushed way past his competence level by liberal white guilt and a compliant media.

The good news is Obama won't be re-elected. The bad news is that like Jimmy Carter, Obama won't go away and will continue on the government dole like most of his constituents. The gift of gaffe will certainly try to take over the U.N. and continue plaguing the world with the personal pronoun and promises of light-bringing to the poor and destitute, usually on the American taxpayer's dime.

Obama has become such a caricature of himself the easiest job in the world is that of White House speechwriter. His use of rhetorical straw-men, the terminal confusion of facts vs fiction, and the worn-out cliches are so obvious and widespread, that I decided to write a speech for the president.

Indeed, I viewed it as my patriotic duty.

David Axelrod, feel free to load this on the teleprompter at the next campaign stop...

[Introduce yourself, but don't say, "Introduce yourself"]

How you all doing, I'm Barack Obama, president of the United States. It's great to be here in, ah, Toledo, home of the Mud Hens and three million other people.

I just wanna give a big shout-out to Chief Steely Dan Black-Bear there in the audience. The Chief won a medal of honor during the Civil War, I think during the battle of the Little Big Horn, and it's great to see him and our other fallen heroes sitting here today.

Likewise let's give a great hey y'all, hee haw to some of our disabled veterans from Iraq and Afghanistan. Why don't you folks get up from your wheelchairs and take a bow. [Wait for applause.] Thank you very much.

Speaking of medals of honor, forgive me if I get confused, since, like, I've given out 5 or 6 of these things. The last to a Navy corpse...man, I believe. But some months ago we had an unfortunate workplace violence incident at Fort Hood, where a lone gunmen, not under any ideological influences, shot 10,000 of our soldiers to death. I was a little upset when I learned about this on the 9th hole, because, you know, these are the same troops that fight for me, personally, throughout the world, and I had another nine to get in.

It also bugged me that the real enemy, conservatives, might use the "alleged" gunman's name, which is different and a lot like mine, to advance hatred and bigotry. So I instructed General Casey to do several things. First, I made it very clear that diversity in the Army will not suffer because of this, and further, that there will be no diverse thinking on the topic of diversity.

Second, I explained to General Casey and the base commander that it's really hot in Texas, and the extreme heat was probably what caused the major to shoot his co-workers. Therefore, I ordered all Fort Hood training areas be made into wind-farms so we have plenty of green energy to cool the barracks and offices.

To achieve my vision of a completely green military, I also recommended the generals' order their troops to trade in their pickup trucks for Chevy Volts. As long as the soldiers keep their tires properly inflated and only drive to their weekly mandatory re-cycling training, we could lower the oceans. Everyone could also be just like Lance Armstrong. Ever notice how he rides his bike to work in France, every day? That way no one will notice when gas prices hit $9 a gallon, as I've instructed Dr Chu to make happen.

And no more long, expensive cruises for our carriers. I've told the Commodores to deep six all but two of our carriers. We'll use one on each coast to host college basketball games. I know Commodore Richie and I look forward to the festivities.

As a nation, Americans are the most wasteful people on earth and we've got to reduce our carbon footprint. This is the message I hammer home every day as I crisscross all 57 states in Air Force One.

Drilling for more oil won't help us. No it won't! I'd rather we got our oil from our friends in the middle east. Neither will nuclear help us. Look what happened when the Chinese bombed Fukushima. Let Iran and north Korea develop their nuclear capabilities without our help.

I know some on the right don't like me messing with the military. "Obama never served," they say.

But I say this, "Who got bin Laden?" Not George Bush! I directed the whole operation myself from my bunker at the White House - with a small assist from George Clooney.

And all those drone assassinations? Forget what I said about needing congressional approval as the junior senator from Illinois. Cocaine's a helluva drug. The only approval we need is from the U.N. and other official agencies outside the U.S., and the FDA.

That's why I feel comfortable giving our Russian friends secret missile data for eastern Europe. It's all part of my push to make my administration the most transparent ever. That's also why we talked about the Seal Team and intelligence haul right after the bin Laden raid. You might be interested to know that as we speak, I've given Hollywood complete access to our special operations tactics and techniques for their bin Laden movie about me.

I might just be guessing here, but I'm thinking that I'll be the leading man in a theater near you come election day.

And what about the Republican "war on women?" We're not going back to the days of back alley abortions and women as second class citizens. No we won't! If there's one thing I learned after all these years it's what you call a people is very close to what you call their language. French people speak French, Chinese people speak Chinese and Austrians speak Austrian.

And speaking of gay marriage, let's not forget our gay and lesbian citizens. My stance on gay marriage has truly evolved to where it is today; a major campaign talking point. I now believe that marriage is between a man and a woman, a man and a man, and a woman and a woman. And sometimes marriage is between a woman and man.

Unlike what conservatives want, we're not going back to when the definition of marriage was simple. No, we won't!

You see, you can never win with conservatives. Remember when I dumped a trillion dollars into shovel ready jobs and then held a fiscal responsibility summit? That's right, you guessed it. The opposition criticized me for having the summit. Who knew at the time there aren't really such things as shovel ready jobs?

But we're moving on. We're not thinking about the past and how George Bush screwed America. I remember when Michelle said to me, "Barack, you've got to get people out of their comfort zones."

Well that's why I keep the White House at 82 degrees. You should see the tourists sweat in the Lincoln bedroom.

The extreme heat also reminds me of my birthplace in either Hawaii, or Kenya, situation dependent.

So even though I don't need people, or any of you, I haven't forgotten about my promise to lower the oceans and bring goodness and light to all. I just need four more years to do it.

May ~~Allah~~ god bless America, or whatever.

Is Obama a Socialist?

2012-05-26T11:09:00.002-07:00

Survey says...YES!

Read the whole article by Aaron Klein of WND.