MINDFUL

Are you OK? Do you need anything?

2007-12-22T11:44:26-08:00

The world will change when each of us
decides that we will write the story that
changes the way we see the world - Peter Block

You've seen the hype. Corporate America has jumped on the green bandwagon. Full-page newspaper ads scream

Company X really, really cares about the environment!

Here's an ad that I noticed in last Sunday's newspaper: Barneys New York offers a "green" shopping bag, embossed with their logo and made of leather -- for only $850!!

Wow. That sure puts to shame my plebian tote of choice -- a plastic market bag worth maybe two cents, folded up and residing in the bottom of my purse (or pocket).

So here we are at (the beginning of) a global economic crisis and staring into the face of environmental catastrophe, and the advertising/PR geniuses are helping Big Business write a variation of the same old story

Buy, buy, buy more of our stuff because, uh, we care about the environmental thing!

Yeah, I know. This edition of Mindful certainly isn't a holly jolly Christmas message, huh? But can you stick with me?

It's way past time to look at our energy usage and our buying habits and our food choices and what those are doing to us and to the animals and to the Earth. It's way past time to make major changes right now to the stories we are writing, to the way we are living and thinking. And here's a most important part to consider in this mess we've created: we will need each other more than ever. Yes. We must begin to take care of each other and communicate and connect and be responsible for another.

Can we start that now? We certainly need some practice since we haven't been doing enough of it so far. It's the community thing, dontcha know. The "taking care of self and others" message vs. "me and mine first and everybody else get the heck outta my way."

A lot of people are quite good at that last one, and it may seem to be the survival story. It isn't. Remember, we need to write world-changing stories, not amp up the angry, fearful, every person for himself narrative.

Meredith Jordan, author of two excellent books, Embracing the Mystery and Standing Still, tells us of a woman -- a senior citizen living on Social Security -- who could easily give in to the "there won't be enough" mindset. Instead, she puts aside whatever money is left over at the end of each month. When she has $100 she finds someone in her community who needs it more than she does and makes a plan for giving it anonymously.

She's taking care of herself and one other.

Reading that story reminded me of a time far in the past when a friend had a very large phone bill. A family emergency had created long distance charges that she wasn't able to pay with her limited income. I wanted to help but thought she would refuse my offer. Besides, I didn't wish to saddle her with yet another unpayable debt. Anonymously, so she wouldn't be obligated, I took care of a substantial part of the bill. The money I will probably never miss, but the joy and awe in her voice when she told me that someone had helped? THAT I will never forget.

No matter what you call it -- Random Act of Kindness or Myself and One Other -- it's lighting a lamp. And it certainly doesn't have to involve dollars.

The images of broken freeways and collapsed houses in the San Francisco Bay Area after the 1989 Loma Prieta earthquake are burned into my brain, even though I lived in Southern California then. Do you remember? That endless loop of TV pictures ... people crawling along an elevated road to help those trapped in cars ... the burning, smashed-sideways homes ....

A friend recently told me of one false story circulating here, in San Francisco, after the quake. Bands of thugs were supposedly roaming neighborhoods and breaking into homes.

Two days after the quake, her doorbell rang. Through the peephole, she saw three men. They didn't look dangerous ... but there were those rumors, after all. Should she trust? Mustering her courage, she opened the door. The three explained, "We're checking on all of our neighbors. Are you OK? Do you need anything?"

It was lamp lighting at its finest. Her part was to open the door.

Wrapped up in ourselves and our fears, we all too often forget to ask those elementary questions. Are you OK? Do you need anything? You open your heart and extend a hand, acting as if you live in a world without fear.

Can we start writing that story? Now?

Flying Home - Bill Fox's Connecting Story

2007-12-22T11:27:47-08:00

True stories of amazing intersections ...

Did you watch the Ken Burns special on PBS, "The War"? In the second episode, there was a segment about a B-17 raid on Schweinfurt, Germany. Bill Fox, now a team photographer for the San Francisco 49ers, told Connecting Stories months ago about his part in that bombing.

Schweinfurt was, Bill said, "... the center of the German ball bearing industry. That morning, two hundred and ninety-one B-17 Flying Fortresses took off from bases in England headed east toward the German border. Sixty were shot down, taking with them more than 600 men ...."

Bill doesn't remember everything about that October day in 1943, but that's understandable because it was a lifetime ago. One thing he's sure of: he was one of the B-17 pilots who died that day when his plane was shot down.

You don't want to miss this story!

Or copy and paste http://connectingstories.com/moreStories12.html

Dancing in the Street

2007-12-22T11:22:29-08:00

SIGNS OF HOPE ARE BIG OR SMALL ACTS OF KINDNESS, COURAGE, STRENGTH, CONNECTION...

Every Sunday (weather permitting) for eleven years, people have gathered to swing dance in San Francisco's Golden Gate Park. Live music. DJ. It's free, and free lessons are offered too. There are similar events in other U.S. cities, as well as in Japan, Canada, the UK and Spain.

Click to find one near you.

Or copy and paste http://www.lindyinthepark.com/swing-links/

ENTERTAINING ANGELS

2007-06-09T11:11:56-07:00

Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby
some have entertained angels unawares. - Hebrews 13:2

There are more stories every day of people seeking and building community.

The San Francisco Chronicle reports that restaurant communal dining is catching on in our city. Big tables in the middle of the room have been tried here before and were not a hit, they say. But they're back, and the dining public is seeking them out. One person speculated that it's due to a need to get relief from our solitary Internet time. Or are more people seeing the false illusion that we are all separate?

Half-way across the country (in Denver) and a world away from the upscale restaurant biz, Brad and Libby Birky definitely get it. The Birkys are doing more than feeding the hungry. Eight months ago they set out to build a community with their SAME ("So All May Eat") Cafe. Tiny place. Seven tables. No cash register or menu prices. Pay what you can and if you can't, then help out by washing dishes or chopping veggies.

In a Los Angeles Times interview, Libby Birky said,

It's not just the food .... Often, homeless people, people in need, don't receive the same attention and care. Here, someone recognizes them, looks them in the eye, talks to them like they're just as valuable as the next person in line. That's why we do this.

They serve up fresh, homemade organic food -- pizza, soup, salad and dessert -- five days a week. Do I need to tell you that this isn't a moneymaker? Both Birkys work at other jobs to keep the cafe going.

Here's their website and a link to their latest blog entry. Your donation is tax deductible. Why not grab your checkbook and send them a little something right now -- whatever you can spare -- just because it's a fine thing to do?

On the other side of our need to connect is a need for solitude. Seeking relief from a difficult week, I walked my dog up to a little park at the top of a hill. I call it a hill. Some might say it's a mountain -- so far up in the sky that you see postcard views of Alcatraz to the north and the Bay Bridge to the east.

The amazing thing: it is utterly silent up there, aside from the sound of the wind. Imagine that. A quiet public space in this busy city.

The silence, all by itself, is magical enough, but today there were rainbows. A confluence of long wisps of fast-moving fog and bursts of sunshine created quick fans of color around one branch of a massive old Deodar tree. I blinked and the rainbow was gone. And then another would appear.

I sat on a bench paying attention to the quiet and wondering which is more magnificent -- rainbows dancing around a tree or the loving kindness of Brad and Libby Birky.

Aren't we lucky? We have both.

MIKE'S STORY: A Crew of Angels

2007-06-09T10:57:20-07:00

True stories of amazing intersections ...

Read Stu's story about the synchronicity and the people who saved his son's life after a boating accident. He said:

Later as the fog of grief cleared, I thought that there was far more going on during those decisive first hours than "good luck." I came to believe firmly that Michael was actually being watched over by powers greater than we could imagine, that his guardian angel was on duty and that, if things got really bad, this angel had even higher recourse.

Scroll down on this page for "MIKE'S STORY: A Crew of Angels"

AN EXTRA VALENTINE

2007-02-12T15:38:10-08:00

I can hear you worrying right now, "How do I get in a warm fuzzy mood for Valentine's Day when there's so much bad stuff going on?"

I know. With a deranged astronaut in diapers, Microsoft's Windows Vista release and the untimely demise of Anna Nicole, it's been a rough month -- already. Who feels like celebrating?

But here's the thing we can't forget: Love is the answer, the only way we can rescue ourselves and the big, spinning orb that we're all trying to hold on to. Therefore, we must EXPAND the Feb. 14 festivities, rather than cutting back.

Here's my suggestion: Give a valentine to a stranger. Yep. While you're sending email valentines, while you're shopping for someone special, plan a valentine for someone you don't know. It can be simply a heart drawn and "Happy Valentine's Day" written on a piece of paper.

It's easy. Make it, put it in your pocket, walk down the street and give it away. You might even hand out more than one. If you want.

Let me know how that works for you.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY

2007-02-12T15:27:21-08:00

jane allen

HE LIED ABOUT NEARLY EVERYTHING

2007-02-12T15:24:56-08:00

CONNECTING STORIES

True stories of amazing intersections ...

Hallie left her big city life -- security, comfort, friends, family, job, apartment -- to follow her dream of interning on an organic farm. Some people said she was crazy and predicted she'd return home very soon. When her plane landed in Oregon, everything she owned was in a few pieces of luggage.

And then she stepped into a nightmare. It was a lie. There was no farm; no internship waited for her. Then two strangers rescued her.

Scroll down on this page to read HE LIED ABOUT NEARLY EVERYTHING - a story of friendship, generosity and love.

Global MindShift

2007-02-12T15:20:25-08:00

BIG OR SMALL ACTS OF KINDNESS, COURAGE, STRENGTH, CONNECTION...

If you like having conversations that matter, Global MindShift has four-week online discussion groups that are free and fabulous! From the website:

Today we live in a world where “who we are” is much bigger and more inclusive than many of us have traditionally thought. The image that we now have of the earth from space, coupled with growing challenges that are global in scope, tell us that it is no longer sufficient to be identified only with our country, culture, or religion. Today we are called to identify with the whole planet, and all of life.

In this introductory conversation we explore what some have called “the new story” – new information that expands our understanding of who we are, where we have come from, and what we are now called to do.

SMALL CELEBRATIONS

2007-01-01T22:07:52-08:00

Are there things you're saving for a special occasion instead of enjoying today? Not using something that you love -- thinking it could be damaged or lost -- is another fear-based trap. There isn't enough time for that. This day is what we have. This celebration. This moment. Right now.

* * * * * *

ONE SUMMER AFTERNOON when I was 12, I cooked up some chocolate pudding. To make the from-a-package dessert a little bit special, I let it cool and then quite cautiously spooned it into four of my mother's etched crystal goblets. They were, I knew, a wedding gift from 18 years earlier. Beautiful and delicate and rarely used, their home was way in the back of a cupboard. Even so, I thought it would be OK ... if I was really careful.

Oh boy, was I wrong.

I still remember the sound of Mom's fear -- a sharp intake of breath -- when she saw them adorned with pudding and standing on the kitchen counter.

It took me a while to release those lessons ... that "good" stuff -- like china, silver and crystal -- had to stay tucked away in a cupboard or closet ... that precious objects were to be brought out only for company on holidays. Best to keep them wrapped up most of the time. Out of sight meant: safe from harm.

When I finally gave up that scarcity/fear thinking, I found that an ordinary wine somehow tasted better in a fine glass and a beautiful plate made leftovers elegant. Whenever they are used, much-loved items create small celebrations.

In my kitchen, there is a silver sugar and creamer set that belonged to my husband's mother. Both pieces have several small dents. While I'm polishing, I speculate about how those dents came to be. During a move? Or maybe there was an argument, generations ago, and sterling silver objects were tossed around? Or could they have been thrown out by mistake and then rescued from a trash bin? The people who would know are all gone now. I'm left with fantasies and two less-than-perfect treasures. Still, I choose to celebrate them every day.