Caring affects our motivation to reach out to others or just be receptive to others’ attempts to connect.  How do we maintain such a caring attitude like Jesus did on earth?

In the Gospels, we find Jesus receiving help and support from His Father and others.  One reason why Jesus was able to connect and care with others is, He willingly received what He needed from others.  While receiving with one hand, Jesus gave with the other hand.

Growing relationships are mutual in nature, both giving and receiving.  In ministry, mutual relationships are difficulty because of the focus of ministry is generally “giving”.  Plus the attitude of ministry is generally 24/7, so our focus may not be on our needs or seeking to get our needs met.

As simple as taking a shower or eating breakfast in the morning can make a good start to our day, reaching out to receive support, a friendly voice or a hug can be enough fuel to fire up our desire to care for others.

What fuels your attitude to care?

Is it time to “throw another log on the fire”?

After the holidays, Eric picked up where he left off, excited and anticipating what God would do in 2012.  This week, at staff meeting, their pastor reported his concern about low attendance and offerings over the last month, unlike the last few years.  Eric wondered, what does this mean for his ministry and family?

Kevin enjoys the Christmas season and time with his growing family.  In fact, reflecting back over the last few weeks, he could not think of a more memorable time with his family.  Today, Kevin’s wife Julie called inquiring when he would be home since she is feeling overwhelmed with the kids.  Julie wonders how her and Kevin will manage their schedule at home and church?

When anticipating a new year and it’s challenges, what do you wonder about?  We learn quickly in ministry and family life, we can never take anything for granted, especially in our ever changing world.

God told Joshua, when considering the future of their new kingdom in the promise land, “Be strong and very courageous.  Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9)

What do you hear God telling Joshua?  What is God telling you through His Word regarding your new year challenges?  How will God’s presence affect your thoughts about today’s needs and tomorrow’s concerns?

G. K. Chesterton’s quote is the best by far.   

Tim Detmer’s December e-letter called TidBits from Tim provides some helpful hints about holiday, party eating habits.  Here are some of his ideas.

Short Cut #1: Eat a sensible meal before the party.
You should always arrive at parties with a full stomach. I realize that this goes against the popular trend of starving yourself before a party, and that’s exactly why most people gain weight. Since your stomach will be full, you’ll have the clarity to pick and choose the treats that you really want, rather than stuffing yourself with everything in sight.

Short Cut #2: Bring a healthy dish to share.
Don’t worry if the party that you’re going to isn’t a potluck – the hostess will love you for being so thoughtful, and you’ll have a healthy option to enjoy.

Short Cut #3: Never drink calories.
Do you realize how quickly calories add up when you’re slurping them out of a cup? Sweet holiday drinks are simply packed with calories. These calories don’t take up much room in your stomach so you’re left wide open for even more calories.

Your best strategy is to avoid these beverages altogether, and stick with water. Aim to drink 2-3 glasses of water at the party.

Short Cut #4: Fill your plate, but only once.
I’m certainly not going to tell you that you shouldn’t eat anything at the party. By all means, go and fill up your plate. But only once.

That’s right, you heard me. No going back for seconds. Since you’ve already eaten a sensible meal before arriving, this rule is going to be easier to keep than you think.

Short Cut #5: Taste dessert, just a taste.
The holidays are all about sweet treats, so go ahead and partake. But just a taste. Look at desserts as something to savor, not something to fill up on.

And since you ate a sensible meal before you came, then you filled up your dinner plate once you’re probably going to be pretty full at this point anyway.

That’s it – all you need to know to not gain a single pound at holiday parties.

You can visit Tim’s site at:  http://www.timstraining.com/

For me, praying harder means trusting more, realizing it depends less on me and more on my Father.  Trust without ceasing. Set aside anxiety after making my request. I’m struggling to shift my agony in prayer to agonizing over faith in the Faithful One and to sweat over letting go, to let him control, to accept whatever outcome he chooses.

Mark Reed

Author of Rehearsing for Heaven

These are tough words to read and hear from a man of wisdom.  Yet, Solomon speaks to the core of our heart of need to remember His purposes for practicing spiritual disciplines.  Here are some reminders:

One purpose for practicing spiritual disciplines is to bring a deeper dependence upon our Father.  For example, moving from an inner chaos towards renewal and power through God’s Spirit.  Developing relationships based upon God’s righteousness and grace.  Seeking God’s goodness to happen in others and our self in the midst of turmoil and loss.

A second purpose of practicing spiritual disciplines is to become more God-centered.  In ministry, serving can be both giving attention to others while being the center of attention.  While we preach, lead, teach or e-mail, we expect others to pay attention to us. Sometimes we treat God the same way.

A third purpose is as a part of worshipping God, our creator and sovereign Lord.  In ministry, it’s easy to become frustrated or stressed, at times uncertain of God’s plan, provision and timing.  God still expects us to submit and trust.  Worship becomes the expression and evidence of submission to Him who sits on heaven’s mercy seat.

Jamie woke up thinking about who came to the Bible study last night and why others stayed home.  Mark e-mailed staff members this morning about turning in their attendance and expense reports for the elders’ meeting.  Monday morning, Jan looked over her tight schedule wondering when she was going to have time set up for Sunday services.

Your job description, ministry responsibilities and expectations often cause you pressure.  As you have grown, you have found ministry is primarily about God’s work within you and others; less about your efforts.  So relying on God’s internal work relieves some of the pressure, but you still need to get the work done.

In John Townsend’s latest book, Beyond Boundaries:  Learning to Trust Again in Relationships, he identifies two types of boundaries that empowers us to be free of unnecessary pressure.  First, “defining boundaries” identify who you are as a person, which allows you put aside false identities.  Then, “protective boundaries” keep you safe in unsafe situations, especially when unfair expectations are placed upon you.  How do these boundaries apply to you in ministry?

Now consider the following questions to deflate unnecessary pressure:

What pressure do I put on myself to succeed in ministry?

What boundaries do I avoid or cross in order to be successful in ministry?

What pressure can I lay down in order to focus on the primary calling from Jesus?

Social science research has found one’s “social support” and “supportive relationships” to be a significant factor in coping with stress. In fact, research (Burkinshaw 2004) found leaders’ resiliency to stress was dependent upon their social support; defined as “the ability to rely on others to aid them with stressful situations”. In fact, emotional, supportive relationships were found more important than taking care of one’s physical health.

Do you think the writer of Ecclesiastes said:  “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

Rate (1-10 scale) your ability to rely on others to aid you with stressful situations.

If you rated yourself as an “8″ or above, you do a good job relying on others. If a “7″ or below, ask yourself, “What gets in my way of relying on others?” How could you reliance on others be different?

Contact gary@ministrycare.org for questions or comments.

Random thoughts—good, evil, indifferent—pass through our minds, but it’s the ones we keep and develop and build images around, those are the thoughts that define us. Same with emotions—emotion happens to all of us, some more intensely than others and triggered by different events—but emotions pass through us and those we keep and nurture are the ones that affect our actions and attitudes.

So we need to develop our thought filters and emotion filters. And meditation is one discipline that helps us do that.  Try this: select a characteristic of God such as patience and focus your thoughts on examples of his patience from the Bible, from your life and others’. When or with whom is he patient that I am not? Try focusing on a verse, an act of Jesus, the example of people you admire. Do this several times a week and you will discover an increasing ability to focus on the “keeper” thoughts and to throw away the  worthless ones.

“Set your mind and heart on things above!”

Mark Reed

Author of Rehearsing for Heaven