This weekend a friend told me that they find it quite inspiring that I am always “into it” (my work). These words took me by surprise. You see, even though I do enjoy my work and rejoice as my clients enjoy small accomplishments on a weekly basis, my work doesn’t exist in a vacuum. Swirling around the sessions, and prep work are the winds of my personal life and familial responsibilities.

Last week in particular had been especially rough and my level of motivation was practically flatlining. So as my friend commented about my always being ‘into it’, I wondered if there was indeed something to his words. It is true that I do keep on ‘keeping on’ despite my periodic feelings of personal inertia, despite sometimes feeling that it is ‘all for naught’. Why is this?

I thought that the question deserved some introspection as I know that many of you face feelings of personal overwhelm, feelings that can have very real influence on your work performance and job satisfaction. How do you balance and address this without employing self-destructive measures?

More and more the workplace has become an artificial arena for staged performances and plastic impressions of uniformity and ‘pleasantness’. Not exactly a forgiving or understanding arena for the rough edges and sometimes introspective impulses that can be caused by dealing with the illness of a loved one (or ones self), the ending of a relationship, or clinical depression.

It is easy for us to feel that we have to shut down, to shut off our pain and anger with prescriptions, with sarcasm, with power struggles. After all, we -need- this job for our own material well-being and how else can we be expected to get through the 8, 10, and sometimes 12 hour work days that are demanded of us?

I have no clear answers for this. Each situation and person is unique and I believe should be addressed as such. However I feel that maybe in offering what has worked for me, you can find an idea or two that you can tailor to your own circumstance.

Firstly: I Find My Resolve.

When I feel overwhelmed I turn to my Higher Power and ask for a ‘refill’. I find it very rewarding to believe that I can ‘let go’ to a certain extent and still be protected, nurtured, taken care of. To those agnostics/atheists out there, I am perfectly willing to admit that this may all be a psychological illusion on my part, but it works and I recommend that you try it using whatever terms you find most palatable.

Secondly: I give to myself

You can not give to others indefinitely without giving to yourself. This becomes even more important if there are people who rely on you (on the job and off) for direction and input. Ways I give to myself include regular exercise on a morning, a healthy snack once a day, meditation. Find ways that you can give to yourself in a loving, affirming manner on a regular basis, even if it is only for 10 minutes a day.

Thirdly: I remember my reasons for doing this in the first place

Why do I do what I do? Well because I love helping people and I love to see them realize their true potential. Why do you do what you do? That’s for you to find out. But once you do I hope that you will see that you do make a difference, you do have meaning, and that even if you can’t perform at 100%, even at 30% you are contributing to something that matters to you in a way that no one else can. Creating a personal mantra and/or dream map, has helped me to internalize and visualize the difference and contribution that I want to make in my life. Give it a try!

Fourthly: I do my best to maintain my structure/routines

Structure and routine give us a feeling that there is something reliable in this crazy world we live in. That’s why when I get down I fight, and sometimes I really mean FIGHT, to keep my routine as stable as possible. Even if I slide and sleep in for an extra hour here and there, when I do wake up, I try not to beat myself up about it, and instead tackle the next thing that is due to be tackled, as if I had never missed a beat.

Fifthly: I get the hardest thing out of the way first.

What are you avoiding or dreading today? Tackling this very thing first is a quick way to boost your productivity and morale on the job with very little extra manhours and/or effort.

Sixthly (and finally): I make time to express my thoughts and feelings.

This is actually probably the most important thing on this list but I have placed it last because this will usually be done at the very end (or beginning) of your day when you are all alone. I highly recommend journalling (yes even for your guys) about what is going on in your head in a notebook. I know that blogging is all the rage now but there is something about handwriting that I find is more in tune with expressing internal patterns than typing. Still this may just be my preference and if a keyboard is what helps you to ‘get it all out’ then by all means go down that road. For those feelings that can’t be expressed with words feel free to rediscover the worlds of dance, music, painting and sports.

I hope that these tips will have some practical use for you in your own work-life. There -are- healthy ways out of these crisis periods that hit all of us from time to time. You just need to raise your head out of your hands to see them. If your pain is especially acute at this time you may need help. Don’t be afraid to ask. Turn to a trusted friend, a religious leader, a life coach, or a therapist. If your employer offers an Employee Assistance Program take advantage of it. Don’t lose faith, the light will return to your life. Welcome it.

RESOURCE:

• Depression in the Workplace (HealthyPlace.com): http://www.healthyplace.com/communities/depression/related/work.asp

Have you noticed how competitive business has become? It appears these days that there are more advertising agencies, radio stations, doctors, lawyers, web designers, even coaches than ever before! If you find yourself nodding to this, and are trying to tell yourself that ‘the quality of my work will speak for itself’ I have some bad news for you. You might be doing an outstanding job, but if nobody notices, your efforts are likely to go unrewarded.

Marketing one’s self is a practice that every ambitious individual should get into the habit of mastering. Without a doubt it is one of the major stumbling blocks that I have found when dealing with business owners and executives in my coaching practice. That is why I have come up with 5 simple steps that, if followed consistently, will dramatically raise your professional visibility. Whether you are a company owner, solo professional or an employee looking to raise their workplace profile the below action steps will help you to create your very own personalized PR campaign. Feel free to drop me a line to let me know how it works for you!

1. See the Big Picture

Action Step: Attend one high visibility event every month for the next 12 months. These can include professional association meetings and/or social events, conferences, seminars, workshops, etc.

2. Lead by Example.

Action Step: At the start of each month, look at your To-Do list. What upcoming task can you effectively delegate either in-house or by outsourcing?

3. Stop Self-Sabotage!

Action Step: Every Monday, take one overdue task and resolve to complete it that week, either through your own efforts or through delegation/outsourcing.

4. Position Yourself As An Authority.
Warning!: This method only works if you are truly passionate about your industry/vocation. If you can’t work yourself up to a passion point this may be a warning sign that you are in the wrong line of work!

Action Step: Once a quarter create a mini-workshop, class, media appearance or other vehicle for sharing your knowledge and passion with your existing client base or the public. If you are still working on your public speaking skills then write an article for a trade publication or a local newspaper (be sure to put a promotional blurb for your company at the ending of your article).

5. Volunteer.

Action Step: Once a quarter volunteer for a professional association’s committee or event. Ideally you should be the member of 1 to 3 organizations serving your industry and/or target market.

It may seem simplistic but in an increasingly love-starved world small gestures have the power to change your life. Regardless of our position in the social pecking order each one of us secretly longs to be seen and valued for who we are. An act of appreciation, that comes from a sincere emotional place accomplishes that and forges a bond.

All too often we look for material ways to motivate those around us. We tell ourselves that they are looking for more benefits, a raise, an expensive vacation, new clothes, the latest games. Yet, this is rarely the case. Indeed, studies have consistently shown that for the past 60 years managers have failed to realize that the key to employee retention lies in that free intangible “appreciation”.

For Faizah Assad-Perry M.D., a Houston-based heart surgeon, it is the little gestures of appreciation from her patients which keep her passion for her vocation alive. She recollects visiting an elderly gentleman after his surgery. “He reached out his frail hand to me and said… I feel so much better. I may live to be 100 now. Thank you. i dont know.. just the gratitude I felt in his voice and saw in his eyes. How he said he would live to be hundred and to know that no matter how long he held on to life that he recognized that my work had improved the quality of his life…”

Is it any coincidence that the word appreciate also means “to increase in value”? I think not, for every time we show a person that we appreciate them, even for the simplest of acts, a connection is formed. A connection that increases in value with each subsequent act of appreciation. The French philosopher Voltaire once stated “Appreciation is a wonderful thing. It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.” Indeed for Assad-Perry these shared moments between her and her patients make the long hours and stress more than worthwhile. “They give me hope that I am truly appreciated and that my work is not in vain and only about getting paid.. but that I am truly making a difference.”

With this knowledge it becomes simple to see how we can begin to create a turnaround in those areas of our personal and professional lives where a lack may be perceived. Let’s all resolve to create opportunities to show and receive appreciation!

Begin by asking yourself the following:

• How am I showing my loved ones that I appreciate them?
• How am I showing my boss/coworkers/employees that I appreciate them?
• How am I showing my customers that I appreciate them?
• How am I showing my vendors that I appreciate them?

Now think of 1 way that you can show appreciation to 3 of the categories listed above over the next 7 days.

Be sure to not just leave them on paper though. Make appreciation a part of your daily life and the rewards are sure to surprise you!

“An unexamined life is not worth living” – Madonna

Love her or hate her the Material Girl was on to something when she sang the above line. Although we may be alive, unless we have an ongoing connection with our true passion can we really say that we are living?

Here are 5 simple ways to see if you are living a life that is full of passion.

• Do you feel energized and excited to get through the day?
• Do you feel that you have a unique perspective or gift to share with the world?
• Are you making a living doing what you know you were born to do?
• Are people always asking you what your ‘secret’ is?
• Do you love what you do so much that sometimes you forget about the money?

So how did you score? If you got 3 or more congratulations! You are definitely working your way towards living a passionate life. However, if you are like most people you probably got 2 or less. If this is the case, it’s time for a Passion Pill!

Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not necessarily talking about trips to the Eiffel Tower or bungee jumping off a skyscraper (though these are all things that you should do if you have the desire). Passion does not have to be costly, nor does it have to be public. What it does have to be though is self-derived.

If it has been a long time since you have thought about a passion that was yours and yours alone look back onto your childhood and adolescence. What did you love to do? What did you grow up dreaming that you would be? Forget about any messages that you may have gotten from others that made you put these dreams into a box and lock them away. Believe it or not you knew more about yourself than they ever did. Take the time to allow these dreams to come to life again. Look at them again, see what they have to say to you, see if they have faded any.

“But Sarina I wanted to be an astronaut! Isn’t it a bit late for me to go to NASA?”

Don’t worry about how impractical the job title that appealed to you may now seem. What is important is the emotions and skills that made the job appealing to you. Taking the above example of the astronaut. Did going into unchartered territory appeal to you? Was the idea of exploration and solitude thrilling? Narrow these things down and you’ll begin to see what your passion is. What drives you.

Now ask yourself, how many of these traits are now present in your daily life? Are there ways that you can incorporate them into your job? Are their hobbies that you can restart or begin that carry these traits? Keep in mind the test isn’t about achieving these things on a grand scale, instead it is about achieving them on an authentic level. So whether it is something as simple as setting aside an hour a day to do nothing but listen to your favorite CD at top volume or whether it is signing up for ballroom dancing begin to put your vision into action. See the art of the possible and live with passion.

As I sat at my computer in the pre-dawn hours, I heard 5 gun shots ring out. Quickly I ducked, closed my blinds and turned off my lights. My illusion of calm, serenity, and predictability was shattered, and I had a hard time falling asleep.

The irony of this happening on my country’s Emancipation Day was not lost on me. I live in one of the safest areas that a person could live in, and yet last night I realized that we are not immune to the social ills that plague millions around the world. Yet, instead of re-framing this into a feeling of thankfulness and determination, I cowered and withdrew. Very much the opposite of the spirit of Emancipation! I had chosen an outlook that victimized instead of empowered.

The mind is a crazy, wonderful, powerful tool. One that too few of us really know how to wield. It fights as hard for us as it will fight against us. it all depends on how we use it. It all depends on we choose to emancipate it, and in doing so emancipate ourselves.

So, let me throw out some scenarios and let’s see how and if you can relate:

• Do you feel that the more others have, the less there is for you? Less love, less money, less opportunities?

Emancipate yourself! Don’t worry about what others have, or about what you don’t have. Focus on what you want. What values do you want to embody? What life do you want to create? What lessons can you get out of where you are right now? Prosperity is born out of infinity, and there is an abundant supply of support and prosperity waiting for you to just tap into. Are you really ready for it? Does the idea scare you any? Quite often envy emerges when we are really jealous that someone sucessfully took a risk that we have been talking ourselves out of for as long as we can remember. Stop being jealous. You can do it too. Emancipate yourself. Take the risk!

• Do you replay every negative event and exchange that happened this week, last week, and the week before that?

Emancipate yourself! These thoughts and voices only stick because they affirm your image of yourself. It’s time to allow yourself to have a larger vision of what you can be. A larger vision of what you are capable of, and to give these mental tapes a virtual toss. And, if your current personal or professional situation is contributing to your toxic intake, if you don’t feel respected, valued and appreciated where you are, don’t be afraid to give it the boot as well. All of you will never be well if you are poisioning (or allowing others to poison) even one tiny part of yourself. Honoring yourself will always pay off in the long run, give it a try.

• Do you insist on handling every aspect of your job/business on your lonesome?

EMANCIPATE YOURSELF! This is something that I see especially with entrepreneurs and small business owners. And eventually it is what brings them to their knees. Remember this, if it is true in life, it is true in business. The rules don’t change. If you can’t ask for help you will never grow. Never. Stop playing the martyr and empower yourself to reach your potential. If I can take on an assistant after all these years (and no it wasn’t easy ) so can you. By the way this also works for parents, let your kids start being responsible for things around the house. It develops their feelings of responsibility, pride, and frees you to be… YOU!

You. It all comes right back to you. Not your boss. Not your parents. Not your country, your religion or your neighbours. It’s you. You are enough now. You are as enough now as the day you were born. So ask yourself. Do I want to be enslaved? Or do I want to be emancipated?

It all comes down to choices. The choices you make. And those choices begin right now. Embrace them.

What would you do if disaster struck? Are you prepared for the worst-case scenario?

These are the questions that I asked myself as, like many of you, I watched the earthquake in Haiti and, more recently, the floods in Australia. What would I do to protect myself and my loved ones? What would I pick up? How would I rebuild? Where would I begin?

The more I thought, the more the old Scout motto came into my mind “Be Prepared”. With proper preparation and foresight we can alleviate (to some extent) the disorientation and helplessness that comes with personal disaster. With proper preparation we can show the Universe (and loved ones) that we are not taking our current good fortune for granted, nor should we.

So what are some things that you can do to prepare for disaster?

Below are some ideas that I have put together in the past few days. In no way are they exhaustive, and if you have steps that you have taken (or suggest) feel free to comment to this article and share them with me and others! This is definitely one area where too many cooks can only help the broth!

1. Prepare a Will (Living or otherwise). Don’t leave your loved ones with more difficult decisions than necessary!

2. Have your medicines in an area where they can be conveniently collected and ported. Throw in notes of your medical conditions etc. My mother is an insulin-dependent diabetic, and although it may not buy us much time we have a small thermos in the freezer for her insulin should we have to evacuate.

3. Have your documents stored in a safety deposit box (off-site) and have copies in a fireproof container (on-site).

4. Place jewelry and other valuables in a container. I learnt online about a neat trick of painting the inside of a mayonnaise or Cool Whip bottle white and using that jar to hold your valuables in the fridge! I am guessing that that guise may also help if you are in transit as well.

5. Read/go over Flylady’s 11 Points to Preparedness for Evacuation: http://www.flylady.net/pages/FLYingLessons_Prepared.asp

6. Have your Hard Drive backups and most important work/client files in a fireproof cabinet that can also be easily transported/accessed.

7. Have all money/credit cards/identification cards in your wallet

8. Remain up to date on all insurance.

Completing even 1 or 2 of these procedures this week should give you and your loved ones greater peace of mind.

Many times we put these items off because they bring our own mortality and vulnerability to the front burner. However it is important that we see life for what it is, and not just what we wish it to be. For example, I have an aunt who refuses to make a will out of “superstition” that it will lead to an untimely end.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but eventually we all meet our end. As the images on the nightly news regularly show all of us, there are forces out there larger than us, larger than our plans, larger than our best intentions. Maybe the good times will continue for you (and I pray that they will) but they also may not. And in that case, isn’t it better for us, and for those we love, to Be Prepared?