Molly and Lynne freak out over shit.

I want to go to there too. So much.

2013-08-15T13:07:00.005-07:00

I think the ladies over at Bust pretty much said it all.

p.s. You can also fan the adorable Nic and Pancho on Facebook here.

*swoons*

CUTE ATTACK!

2013-08-09T13:45:00.000-07:00

So lately I feel like I've been a bit of a bummer. I know! All ranting & serious. Not enough of the cuteness and the snuggly adorable that we all know I love so damn much. So I thought I'd post a few of my favorite cutenesses. I look at these ALL THE TIME. They cheer me up, they make me happy, they need to be shared!

First up, the Sleepy Duck:

OH MAN. LOOK AT THAT WEE SLEEPY DUCKLING!! I feel like that a lot. So I feel like I understand Sleepy Duck! And he understands me! OMG. When his head hits the spirals of the notebook and he looks up all "whoa, did I just doze off for a sec?" it makes my heart EXPLODE. I LOVE THAT DUCK.

Okay, next up, this rad Panda with Sassy Attitude:

The look that little guy gives when the trainer touches his ball?!? SO AWESOME. He's so fiery and full of sass! He loves his ball SO MUCH. My kid is currently watching this with me, and he's jumping up and down shouting "Baby bear! Yay baby bear! Yay panda bear!" so clearly this little bossy panda has plenty of street cred with 3 year olds. I just got distracted cracking up and watching the panda for another minute or two. I LOVE HIM.

So there you have it. Two pieces of cuteness that make my life worth living. SQUEEEEEE!!!

An open letter to the Whovians

2013-08-06T21:13:00.000-07:00

Ok Doctor Who fans, we need to talk.

Look, this new guy? I know I'm going to grow to like him well enough eventually. I know he's a fine actor and honestly, he's already endeared himself to me a little with all the swearing. I'm a sucker for an f-bomb, let's face it.

But I still reserve the right to be disappointed for a little while. Hear me out now.

Sure, he's not really that old (hell, I'm almost his age) but he's not all that dashing and handsome either, and that's part of what has made this show fun lately. Of course the old school Docs were just as old and weird looking. But you know what? They're not as fun to watch these days either.

*ducks from flying jelly babies*

I know! Sacrilege! But I'm sorry, they're not! Television in the sixties was slow and stiff, and not like Cousin Matthew's.. uh, entail coming back to life. Sure, Doctor Who was revolutionary for its time, and an important part of television history. It arguably created a whole new type of fan, and I proudly count my nerdy self among them. But I also recognize that those early days were problematic. Racist, even! And those early companions? Come on, Rose Tyler would kick their whiney little mini-skirted asses (except for Sara Jane of course, we saw how that worked out.) So please don't try to argue that I can't say Capaldi isn't as exciting just because he's as old as this guy was when the show first started. The show is different now. He has a whole new standard to live up to, and part of that is the hotness factor his recent predecessors left.

Shut up, he wasn't hot.

And yes I know it's superficial (DUH) but it's television. We are looking at it with our eyeballs, and if you're not putting a woman in there (ahem, yes I'm one of those fans who vainly hoped for more estrogen aboard the TARDIS) then us hetero ladies would appreciate some mancake on our screens. Is that so wrong, really? There are precious few handsome fellas on the old teevee which nevertheless sports a bazillian boobies. Can't we have a little eye candy once in a while too? The Brits have given us so much lately - aforementioned Cousin Matthew, amirite ladies? Sherlock? Ok he's not really for me, but I know he has his fans. That dude on Endeavor? The freaking royal baby daddy?

And come on, David Tennant?

Anytime, Doctor, anytime.

Yes, he is an amazing actor. Seriously, he took The Doctor to a whole new level, all Whovians must agree, but have you people seen Broadchurch? Hamlet? Or every single thing he touches? He's phenomenal, truly. I'm a fan on all those levels. But he's also PRETTY. Oh so, soooo pretty. Don't get me started on my boy DT. It's actually kind of amazing I haven't freaked out about him here before. Trust me, Molly has signed me up for a delusional Time Lord fantasy support group already, I'm getting help.

I'm just saying, it's nice to have someone pleasant to look at, that's all. That doesn't make me shallow. It doesn't! You're telling me the choice of Jenna-Louise Coleman had nothing to do with her shiny, swingy hair and cute little nose? Karen Gillan wore all those short skirts because she's such a great actress? Hey I love her, don't get me wrong, but dudes wouldn't apologize for liking the eye candy, and I'm not going to either.

Also? Speaking of wee Jenna-Louise? They've put us through the ringer already with the bad writing this past season. That horrible episode - yeah, I said it, suck it Gaiman fans - where Clara left the children in a scary wax museum in an abandoned amusement park in space? And told them to take a nap? With Cybermen?! What kind of nanny is she?? I'm sorry, but she lost all credibility as a companion for me after that move, leaf donation on Akhaten notwithstanding. The Doctor needs his companions to remind him to love, to stop him when he's drowning a million Racnoss in the Thames, to keep him from annihilating the entire Dalek race even if they killed his own in the Time War. To make a half-human, half-Dalek remember his humanity by thinking of his true love, not the pain of his loss. A good companion doesn't so easily put the mere two kids she's been charged with in such danger, even if her greater job (yeah Impozzzzzible Girl, whatevzzz) is to protect The Doctor. I know it's a small point, but it bugged me. It's just lazy writing, and indicative of the downward spiral of the whole last season. It felt like they were seriously making it all up as they went along.

And what, are you guys bringing her back, to pair with the f-bomb dude? Really? Perky little souffle girl in her little plaid dresses, who can't even remember to pick up the kids from the cinema on her way to Trenzalore... with Senor Unibrow?

Ok I know I'm being petty now. And I actually liked that last episode, and I'm intrigued by the whole John Hurt story line. And who doesn't love anything with River Song! Or Vastra, Jenny, and Strax! (who need their own series, Moffat, get on that.) But I think it stood out because the rest of the season was so bad.

Except for this, which was magnificent, and held such promise. (but still, why didn't the TARDIS translate that dog person? just sayin'...) (also? can this little girl please be the next companion? I loved her.)

Yes you were.

I guess I just wanted more, and because the show has been so fantastic (yeah, Nine!) in the past, I think I was right to expect it. That's why I'm a fan. I know they can do better. Moffat can do better. Dude brought us Weeping Angels, come on.

This doesn't make me less of a fan. I'll still watch it. I can't wait for the 50th anniversary (more Rose and Ten! Squee!) and I know I'll get used to 12... er 13, whatever he is. He'll probably be great in his way. I'm willing to give him a shot.

But enough with all the memes about how I'm not a true Whovian (whatever that is) if I'm not excited about Capaldi yet. Like this one, that sent me over the edge today:

And I know these are largely created by very young fans who have nothing better to do than make someecards and post them all over Facebook and everywhere else. The same fans who I'm guessing actually have a secret stash of Twilight books at home and enjoyed them immensely just a few years ago (Team Edward here) until they discovered The Doctor for the first time, watched every single episode ever made (because again, they have the time to do that sort of thing) and now feel like they own the fandom.

Kids, enough with the hate. I feel what I feel. Deal with it, I'm human. Gloriously, imperfectly human, with all those silly human emotions that The Doctor loves so much about us. Don't tell me I'm not enough of a nerd. Don't tell me I have to follow all of your criteria for proper Who fandom. I love what I love, and I don't love this guy yet. Maybe I won't ever. It's really ok to admit that. I grew to appreciate Matt Smith, but I never loved him like Tennant. So what?

Why do us nerds make these things into such a big competition anyway? (insert thoughtful analysis about boy nerds vs girl nerds that I'll get around to writing someday here.) You like some stuff, you don't like other stuff, get over it. It doesn't make you like the stuff you like any less. I actually left a Who facebook group recently after a very heated debate over "Newvians" vs. "Whovians" got personal and mean. Seriously guys, stop taking this so seriously. It's a tv show. It's supposed to be fun. That's all it's ever meant to be: a great story, with great characters, that touches us in a way that's enjoyable and meaningful in whatever way you want it to be. It's not your whole identity, no matter how much you love it.

And I don't love this guy yet, for some of the pettiest, silliest reasons. Guess what, I don't have to. I'm a fan too, and I can do what I want with my own fanaticism. I can mourn the loss of my favorite Doctor as long as I want, and stick my tongue out at the new guy until he makes me like him, which I know he probably will. But he hasn't yet. And I'm genuinely disappointed in the recent writing of this show, for what I think are very valid reasons. So I reserve the right to be disappointed in this choice for now too. Ask me about it again in December, we'll see.

Meanwhile, I know who I'll be dialing up on Netflix...

Honest Company sucks.

2013-08-05T08:28:00.001-07:00

Here's why from People I Want to Punch in the Throat. Who I love, btw, along with Honest Toddler.

I would love to see someone try to take away our name, how about you Molly? Wait, maybe we should trademark the S word???

Pinners, take note..

2013-08-01T09:38:00.001-07:00

Ah, Memories! First Up: The First Time I Ever Talked to a Racist

2013-07-27T14:14:00.000-07:00

Lately I've been thinking a lot about intolerance. It seems like every time I read the news, there's some new horrible story where the basic problem is that there are a lot of people who can't accept that people are different and that's okay. They have to hate people of a different color, a different religion, a different gender, a different sexuality. It makes no sense to me at all, and I've really been thinking a lot about what in the hell this world is coming to if people can't just decide that getting along is more important than everyone being just the same.

So this has had me thinking about the very first time that I remember talking to a racist. I'm sure I'd heard something before, but this was the very first time that the comment was addressed to me. I'll try to paint the scene as best I can. Enjoy!

I was thirteen or fourteen years old, and helping a photographer friend of the family at a school dance. I LOVED this job. LOVED IT. I loved seeing all the girls in fancy dresses, I loved seeing the boys all dressed up and trying to act like it was no big deal that they had on a suit and tie, I loved watching the teachers as chaperones, treating the kids they saw each day like almost grown-ups. It was just fun. It seemed like a safe look into a world that I had an outside chance of joining, and like a way I could learn the ropes so that I wouldn't feel so awkward if I ever got the chance to go. So you know, super fun!

This dance was for a local public high school, and it was held at a place just around the corner from my house. We got there before the kids started arriving, to set up the back drop, the lighting, and the table where I would show the attendees what picture packages they could choose from and collect their money. I was allowed to get myself a bottle of water, as well as some punch and cookies to munch on, and while I was getting my snacks and admiring the dance floor and it's pretty lights and festive paper decorations, the first kids arrived. I hurried back to my station, ready to be helpful and play my own tiny role in each couple's glamorous evening.

Within minutes, the first couple came down the stairs to make their picture decisions. I remember how polite they were to me and to the photographer. They debated for at least 15 minutes over which package to get, and snippets of their conversation floated back to me. He kept telling her that whatever she wanted he was happy to pay for, he'd saved his money so they could have a perfect date. She kept saying that she wanted them to pick together, and kept thanking him for making everything so great so far. She reached up and straightened his tie, smoothed his lapels; he kept telling her that she looked so beautiful, the most beautiful girl in the whole world. They were both glowing at each other, and were wrapped in a sweet bubble of first love. I was enchanted. He was so much taller than her, but every move he made was so gentle and caring. Every time she looked at him, she stood a little straighter and radiated a little brighter. They shared a few sweet and tender kisses, and we all blushed a little knowing I'd been witness to such a private moment. They picked the biggest package they could get, then went over to be the first of the evening to have their pictures taken. As far as I was concerned, I was absolutely thrilled for them, and felt that first real hope that some day, I could be that girl. They smiled brilliantly for their pictures, then stepped aside to watch some friends start the same process, giving each other another sweet kiss to celebrate their evening.

Just then, one of the woman who ran the place where the dance was being held sidled up behind me. She leaned down and whispered, "Oh will you look at that", nodding in their direction. I looked obediently, since a grown up was telling me to do something. The couple was waiting for their friends to finish their pictures, standing with the young man's arms wrapped around her waist from behind. He leaned down and kissed her cheek, and she responded by turning around and kissing him back. At that moment, the woman whispered directly into my ear "Oh my. Those lips. Can you imagine? That lovely girl is kissing his disgusting black lips. Those black hands pawing at her. Just awful."

I felt cold. I felt sick. I had no idea that anything gross or bad was happening, and in fact, I was pretty sure that everything I had witnessed was both lovely and good. I turned in my seat to look at this woman, who gave me a knowing look, and then walked away. She had thrown her horrible dart at me and left, leaving me disgusted and confused. Should I tell someone that she had said that? Was I complicit in her hate just for hearing it? I wasn't sure what my role was in this age-old drama.

I wish I could say that I stood up and followed her and told her what a racist piece of shit she was. I wish I could say that I found a way to shame her for her ugly views, or that I got her to realize how appalling her views were. I didn't. I was only a kid, and I hadn't yet learned that when somebody throws hate your way, you find a way to fight back for goodness. I just knew that for years, I felt a sick pang in my stomach whenever I drove by that place, and wondered how many other kids she whispered her hatred to.

There it is. My first encounter with a racist. However much I wish I could have had the sense to push back right there, I do think that she sent me down the road to knowing that when evil presents itself to you, you have to push back. But I still do wish I had the chance to talk to her now. Because believe you me, my reaction would be much, much stronger, and I wouldn't live my life regretting the chance to shock a racist with logic, open mindedness, and some good old fashioned curse words. I mean, you wouldn't expect anything less of me, right?

Nerdy love song with KITTEN!

2013-07-15T07:35:00.002-07:00

This video has it all! Nerdy love song! Ukelele! Bow tie! KITTEN! Thank you internet!!!!

FREAK OUT

2013-06-20T07:28:00.002-07:00

Or should I say SHEEP OUT?!??? Bah ram ewe!

These lovely goodies are sold here, and also featured right now on Fab. Sheep be true!

we're BAAAAAAACK...

2013-06-11T07:36:00.000-07:00

Because fluffy cows. FLUFFY COWS!

ALERT!

2013-01-31T10:04:00.003-08:00

Rachel Powell wallpaper now available in the US!!!! This is such a great week for textiles!!!!

http://www.justkidswallpaper.com/collections/rachel-powell-wallpaper

GASP

2013-01-29T14:15:00.000-08:00

MOLLY! YOU CAN MAKE YOUR OWN FABRIC HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.spoonflower.com

And wallpaper! And decals! And you can buy stuff!

FREAK OUT!!!!

An Unsolicited Rave About the Best Deodorant EVER

2013-01-25T11:43:00.000-08:00

Right. So, armpits. Armpits are pretty much not something anyone wants to ever discuss, because, well, they get stinky. And sweaty. The Deodorant Mafia has turned our armpits into the Holy Grail of Bodily Grossness, not to mention convincing every last one of us that Women Do Not Sweat Or Stink Ever, C'mon, That's Gross & If You Are A Woman You Should Have Smooth, Stink-Free, Dry Armpits At All Costs. So we slather on nasty chemicals & hope that nobody notices that our shirts get sweat stains, and that sometimes we get a little ripe. Hooray! What a great time to be alive.

But, my friends, I have seen the future. And I'm not turning back. I found what I believe to be THE BEST DEODORANT IN THE (KNOWN) UNIVERSE. And it's all natural. No, seriously, stop laughing. I'm telling the truth! It's from a rad little store called Soapwalla Kitchen on Etsy, and this woman, this genius woman, has created a deodorant that is pretty much the best. THE BEST.

First off, yes, it's a cream, and it comes in a little jar. That's right - you scoop a wee amount out with yr fingers & rub it into yr armpit. I know, I just lost some of you, because we've been taught that our armpits are the most disgusting areas ever, and that we can't possibly touch them without looking like Mary Katherine Gallagher.

Man, I love Molly Shannon! Just looking at that picture made me crack up! Okay, back to the point. But honestly, it's totally not weird at all. I mean, it's just the underside of yr arm, for goodness sake! Anyway, for those of you who are still reading, you just rub it in, it absorbs, and blammo - no stink. Like, NONE. And the stuff itself smells SO GOOD. I kinda do want to do the Mary Katherine routine, but just so that I can smell the stuff because it smells soooooo good! It's awesome.

That's right. I am raving and going bonkers over deodorant. But if you get it, I swear, you'll be right there with me! This stuff is AWESOME. I LOVE IT. I LOVE MY DEODORANT. And Rachel? The genius lady behind Soapwalla Kitchen? I love you, too!

For those of you interested, here's a link to her Etsy site:
http://www.etsy.com/shop/soapwallakitchen?ref=seller_info
And here's the deodorant:
http://www.etsy.com/listing/35641572/deodorant-cream?

Disclaimer: I swear I was not asked or paid to write this or get worked up beyond belief about this product. I really am this worked up beyond belief about this product. It's that awesome! And if it makes you buy some, well, that's even better. I'll get nothing out of it other than another person who uses this awesome deodorant & loves it as much as I do.

Happy holidays, freaks!

2012-12-14T06:59:00.000-08:00

(be sure to watch this with the sound turned on)

Introducing Guest Freaker: THE CRUSHER

2012-10-11T09:59:00.000-07:00

Yeah, we've been a little quiet lately. Hey, in case you didn't notice, there's an election going on and we live in OHIO. We're busy deciding the fate of the whole country over here people, give us a minute.

But meanwhile, fear not, freakers! Just when you were almost bored with us, here we go introducing a new feature to our freakish lineup! It's THE CRUSHER. Cloaked in freakishly fashionable secrecy, The Crusher is about to blow your mind with well reasoned, numbered breakdowns of awesomeness. Can you handle it???

Brace yourself for.....

THE CRUSHER'S BREAKDOWN: Chicken Wallpaper

Why this is brilliant:

1. Chickens

2. Up to date, midcentury-influenced, clean lines, yet with charming reference to old fashioned country kitchens

3. Design is related to dense leafy florals in the way the chickens' back ends are stylized

And 4. CHICKENS.

BOOM! FEEL THE CRUSH!!!

even the clams are freaking out

2012-09-28T05:14:00.000-07:00

Me, last night, curling up in bed, eagerly awaiting my Amazon.com delivery: "I get to read a new JK Rowling book tomorrow!!!"

My husband: "Oh you're just happy as a clam, aren't you?"

Me: "I am! Only I'm not sure clams can read."

Him: "No eyes."

Me: "Right."

Him: "Audio books?"

Me: "I don't think they have ears either."

Him: "Clam braille."

Me: "Do they have fingers?"

Him: "They could use their feet. The meat inside the clam is called a foot. That's how they move around you know, look it up."

Me: "Huh. Okay, I guess I am happy as a clam."

New JK Rowling! FREAK OUT!

hop hop adoobeedeeboo

2012-09-09T18:00:00.002-07:00

Ok, we may have to change the name of this blog to Molly and Lynne and Their Army of Jennifers Freak Out Over Shit. Because once again, the Jennifers have come through in a major way. This one comes from Jennifer S. and it's about to BLOW YOUR MIND. I'm even going to forgive the atrocious grammar because come on! BABY BUNNIEEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and....

2012-08-30T07:06:00.002-07:00

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/campusrivalry/post/2012/08/ohio-state-mocks-sandusky-scandal-with-tasteless-t-shirt/1#.UD9yINbM7z9

"We recently became aware that this T-shirt design is circulating on social media," Gayle Saunders, OSU assistant vice president of media relations, wrote in an e-mail. "This is not a University sanctioned T-shirt, and we have no knowledge of where it originated. It is unacceptable and appalling that someone would make light of a tragedy in this manner."

Thanks to......?
http://www.nydailynews.com/ohio-state-alum-takes-aim-offensive-t-shirt-jerry-sandusky-sex-abuse-scandal-penn-state-taunt-rival-michigan-article-1.1147166

"Needless to say, the shirt is not sitting well with many, including Ohio State alum Molly Litfin from Columbus, Ohio, who started an online petition Wednesday against Ohio State and the Big Ten conference, pleading for the production of the shirts to be discontinued."

And also:
http://bleacherreport.com/articles/1316359-id-rather-shower-at-penn-state-shirts-go-too-far

"In fact, a New York Daily News report by Justin Tasch references Ohio State alum Molly Liftin who started a petition against Ohio State and the Big Ten to stop production of the shirts. It's refreshing to see someone from Ohio State being against this shirt."

WOO! Go Molly! And thanks to Anonymous for pointing out the USA Today article. Friends?

and regarding the R word

2012-08-30T06:46:00.002-07:00

p.s. to Anonymous: I deleted your comment "but in all seriousness that petition is re-fucking-tarded OSU can't do anything about people making or selling those shirts."

Besides just finding it pretty rude to call the author of a blog names, having worked at a preschool for children with special needs for 7 years and having many dear friends in the special needs community, I have ZERO tolerance for the use of that word. Freedom of speech all you want friends, this is our blog and I'm deleting any such comment without apology. You got a thoughtful, respectful response to your other points, and I'm happy to engage in dialogue with you that way. You don't get to insult people with special needs here.

Please visit http://www.r-word.org if you need more information.

Dear Anonymous

2012-08-29T16:16:00.001-07:00

Ok, I know that Molly is perfectly capable of responding eloquently to this, but as the other name on the title of this blog, I feel the need to chime in about her post, and to the many responses from an anonymous reader. Also as her friend I think Molly needs to put some cucumbers on her eyeballs and chill out for the rest of the night. No blood vessels bursting on my watch, please sweetie!

So, Anonymous. I tried to reply in the comments, but I've got too much to say here and Blogger won't let me fit it all in the little comment form. So you get a full post in response. Congratulations.

First, thank you for saying that the shirt is bad. I'm glad we can at least agree on that point.

Now I'm going to start with the easiest point of yours to refute: that this shirt is supposedly not "OSU gear." Actually, Molly acknowledged in her post that it wasn't officially licensed by Ohio State, we all know that it isn't officially OSU gear. However, if you do a quick web search (here you go) you'll find that quite a few people seem to think it is, or are at least happy to jump on the Buckeye-bashing bandwagon as a result of it. So this shirt represents us, and official or not, we're being put in the position of defending ourselves as a result.

And as any Ohioan knows, though the team colors may be scarlet and grey (as you pointed out - as if we don't know), white is often substituted for grey in our fan gear. It just shows up better than grey, let's face it. Even the team's uniforms use white! And the shirt mentions the Wolverines - duh. Who's a bigger rival to the Michigan Wolverines than OSU? Perhaps Michigan State, as you say, but their colors are green and white. So no, pretty sure this shirt is all Buckeye. But if you really want to argue that point, you may be interested to know that this isn't only happening here in the Buckeye state, but also in Michigan, Alabama and Louisiana State (again, try a Google search.) Probably in the time I've taken to type this, half a dozen more have popped up. There's even an Urban Dictionary term for it now. So no, it isn't specifically OSU gear, sadly it's actually much worse than that.

Now, your "women women women, men are bad! bullshit" comment. First of all, yes, you're being an obvious troll here. I might even venture to say that you sound like a complete asshole when you say things like that, and quoting Voltaire just makes you then sound like a very full of himself asshole. And this blog isn't the US government, we are free to censor you all we want - keep up crap like that and we will happily do so. Go start your own blog if you want to exercise your freedom of assholery, that's your right.

Second, it IS misogyny that marginalizes the importance of rape, because rape usually happens to women and girls. Not all the time, and not in this specific instance, but one in four college women are victims of sexual assault. Four. That's me, Molly, and each of our daughters. That makes it our issue. If you begin any way of thinking from the standpoint of valuing one group of people less than another, it follows that crimes done to that group of people will be seen as less horrific than if they were done to the group that is seen as superior. Ask an African American or two or thousand about their experience if you don't think this is true. And don't even get me started on a certain Republican's ridiculous remarks about rape and abortion, or the kind of fights that rape victims have to endure in our country's legal system. Rape is not taken as seriously as it should be because it happens to women. Prove to us that that isn't true - take it seriously. Spend your time fighting the one in four statistic instead of arguing these points with women. As a woman and a feminist (who never said men are bad, who is married to a lovely man, who works with lovely men including Molly's lovely husband), I would love to see this become an issue that isn't deeply tied to misogyny. I would love to see it become an issue that doesn't exist at all, because rape doesn't exist. But too few men are interested in making that happen, and that's why it's especially important to us "women women women."

Finally, to your free speech comment: I think this is really the most valid point to be made here. I agree with you - whoever made this shirt should be free to do so. I think it's wrong, and I think they should stop, but I don't think I have a right to make them stop, and neither does OSU as an institution. I agree that it's a slippery slope when we start trying to shut people up, no matter what nonsense they may say. However, what we all CAN do is exercise our own freedom of speech by expressing our outrage about this. And Ohio State can certainly publicly condemn these shirts, and make it clear that they are not only not producing nor profiting from them, but that they find them offensive on behalf of the Penn State victims and Ohio State fans. They can encourage other schools to do the same. They can call on all college sports fans to begin the season with a little more class, simple as that. A message like that could very powerful coming from OSU President E. Gordon Gee or Coach Meyer, much more than our little blog or even Molly's petition could be (though kudos Molly for starting it!)

Actually, I have one more thing to say. Are you just one person, Anonymous? If so, can you please keep your comments to one post or two instead of flooding our blog with reply after reply? That's a little rude, and again, we can delete them. You're coming to our party, we can kick you out. If you're different people with a similar sentiment, fine, please read the above message too. Thanks.

~ Lynne

There is nothing I can say that will really be enough.

2012-08-29T11:04:00.000-07:00

Okay, so let's just get this out of the way right now. I think football is BORING. I attended & graduated from The Ohio State University, have lived in Columbus, OH my entire life, but I don't give a hoot about OSU football. It's great if you love it, but I get very tired of all the craziness surrounding the OSU football team. Or really, any football team in general. I'm all for going to sporting events & getting into it, or cheering your favorite team on as you watch on tv, but the atmosphere surrounding OSU football is just too much for me.

That said, I know a lot of people, family members included, love OSU football. It means a lot to them, and they sincerely love to cheer on the team, year after year. They hate that I never have any idea what the game schedule is & call while they're watching the game. They think it's weird that I find blue & yellow to be a gorgeous color combination. They love it, they look forward to it, and overall, I think it's really awesome that no matter where you go, in any airport, if you yell out "O-H!" there's a really high chance that someone will yell back "I-O!"

But when I saw this, I almost burst a blood vessel in my brain from pure rage:

If you see this and laugh, well, don't tell me because I will come at you like Jack the Ripper. This is beyond awful. This is EVIL. This is making light of one of the most horrific vaguely sports-related crimes I've ever heard of, and I will not stand for it. Not for one goddamned second. And do you want to know why? Good. Because I'm going to tell you.

1) THIS IS MAKING LIGHT OF THE ABUSE OF CHILDREN. Say that to anyone who thinks it's "just a joke" or that it's just "getting back" at the Penn Staters who made shirts about last year's OSU scandal, which I still don't entirely understand, except that I am 100000000% positive that it didn't involve destroying children through systematic rape & cover up, so it's not even on the same planet as far as sports-related crimes. One is ignoring the rules for dumb shit like trading a jersey for tattoos, the other can destroy a person for the rest of their life. So, not related. Joking about child abuse is NOT FUNNY. N-O-T F-U-N-N-Y. That whole situation makes me so sick & sad that I have literally lost sleep and cried in public places thinking about it. So no, I do not think that this is at all appropriate.

2) THIS IS MAKING LIGHT OF RAPE. I am SO SICK of people (generally men) thinking that rape is something they can josh around with (Daniel Tosh around with?) in a lighthearted manner. Really? When it's your mother, your grandmother, your sister, your cousin, your daughter, will you think it's funny to hear someone joke about it? If not, then STOP JOKING ABOUT IT NOW. I have been lucky enough to be spared this personal hell, but I know more than one person who has not. And for them, and for all who have had to endure not only the act itself, but the callous nature of a society that thinks it's not a big enough deal to not make shitty "college humor" reference t-shirts out of the violation, I AM DISGUSTED AND FULL OF RAGE. If you don't get it, read this paragraph until you do. Or go talk to some real-life rape victims and see how this has forever changed their lives. And not in a magical, wow life is amazing kind of way.

3) THIS IS USING VICTIMS AS A PUNCHLINE. You know what's not funny? THIS. Would you dare go to the scene of a car accident & mock the way the bleeding, lifeless bodies look? No? THEN YOU SHOULDN'T THINK THIS SHIRT IS FUNNY. It's taking a crime that is already marginalized & making it into fodder for cheap laughs. That's insane. INSANE. Would you go down to the hospital & point & laugh at the sick & their families, as they fight to carry on? Would you trip them, shove them, pull out their tubes, all in the name of "hijinks" or "hilarity"? No, you wouldn't, because that sounds awful. But that is EXACTLY what this shirt is doing. "Ha ha ha ha ha! I'd rather be "raped" (as if that's really a bad thing, amirite?) than root for my college's football rival! So funny!" If you agreed with any of that, let me know so I can punch you so hard you go back in time & never exist.

4) THIS IS MISOGYNY. You don't think so? Well my friend, it is. Because if men had to learn how to protect themselves from the threat of rape, it wouldn't be a joke. But all women are taught that they have to do everything in their power to "prevent" themselves from being raped. Think about that. Why do girls walk in pairs or groups, whether it's to the bathroom, home from a party, around an unfamiliar block? To prevent rape. That's right. It's constantly *our job* to keep rapists away from us. And if we fail, and we are raped? Well, you know, we did wear a sexy dress/drink too much/walk alone in the dark/have breasts/consent to sexual behavior up to but not including sex itself/have sex with anyone other than the man in front of you now/etc. So we're really partially to blame. BULLSHIT. You know who carries 1000000000000000000000000% of the blame here? THE RAPIST. Until we start teaching men & boys, that rape is NEVER an option, I'm going to insist that not enough is being done. And I refuse to find humor in anything that implies that rape isn't really a big deal.

I could go on. I really could. But frankly I'm getting so upset that I need to step away. Also I feel obligated to point out that this shirt is NOT LICENSED OSU GEAR. The school itself has nothing to do with it. Some asshole somewhere does, and I swear I'm going to find that person, make them stop, & make them apologize. Which isn't enough, but it's about as much as I can do without the ability to control everything everywhere at all times. So onward & upward with my goal. And the next time you hear or see someone making light of this situation, or any situation involving any of the reasons I pointed out, please don't be silent. Too many good people stand back, letting the jerks win. Please don't let that happen here.

If you so choose, here's my petition trying to block this shirt from existence. Take a second to help, and pass it along if you could. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

http://www.change.org/petitions/the-ohio-state-university-the-big-ten-stop-selling-t-shirts-that-uses-the-horror-of-child-rape-as-college-humor

*Quick update/note: to any of my friends or family who might read this, I should have been more clear. In NO WAY DO I THINK ANYONE I CARE ABOUT SAW THIS SHIRT AND LAUGHED. It hurts me that something I know many hold dear, for good reasons, are being lumped in with some "fans" who think this is funny. This shirt makes loyal OSU fans, my friends & family included, as well as OSU look awful, and that upsets me as well.Just because OSU football doesn't matter to me doesn't mean I'm not very proud to be an OSU grad. My deepest & most sincere apologies if anyone thought for even a second that was my reaction.

Orla Kiely Method Soap!

2012-08-21T16:58:00.001-07:00

Freaky friends, today is a special day. Now being spotted at Target stores nationwide, I bring you....... the Orla Kiely Method hand soap.

That's right Henry, it's AMAZEBALLS.

Henry is reporting on the scene from the Lennox Target here in Columbus. And Correspondent Jen G found Ginger Peach in the Detroit area:

It's so exciting!!! And yes, I bought 6 bottles, elbowing my way through throngs of returning OSU students. Cleanliness is next to awesomeness!!!

i can go twice as high

2012-08-03T13:51:00.000-07:00

All kinds of awesome.

going viral!

2012-08-02T07:26:00.001-07:00

Hey, remember our adorable friends Wayne and Cody?

Well Wayne has written a lovely piece all about the Chick-fil-A issue that is so well done, we all thought it should go viral. I forwarded it to a few famous folks and some other friends did the same, and this morning he's already got 37 thousand likes!!!

Dan Savage of Savage Love (one of the folks I forwarded it to! yay!) called it "amazing" and "required reading" and another 1,455 people retweeted it. It was posted on One Stop Newstand and Mothertalkers already. And it's only 10 am so far.

How awesome is it to see people you like get some well-deserved attention for their work? FREAK OUT AWESOME! Yay Wayne!!!

freaking. out.

2012-07-20T12:26:00.000-07:00

"And as someone who writes about movies, and who cares about the big, flawed thing we call fandom, I’m saddened by someone turning that shared enthusiasm into a weapon. And even if this tragedy hadn’t happened at the premiere of one of a dwindling number of genuinely mass cultural events, I hate the idea of using an audience’s suspension of disbelief, their openness to and absorption in the spectacle unfolding before them, as cover—the gunman reportedly started shooting during a sequence involving gunfire, meaning the audience was slower to react. We are vulnerable when we go to the movies, open to fear, and love, and disgust, and rapture, surrendering our brains and hearts to someone else’s vision of the world. We don’t expect to surrender our bodies, too." ~ Alyssa Rosenberg

and

"We act out because, ironically, we think it will bring us some relief. We equate it with happiness. Often there is some relief, for the moment. When you have an addiction and you fulfill that addiction, there is a moment in which you feel some relief. Then the nightmare gets worse. So it is with aggression. When you get to tell someone off, you might feel pretty good for a while, but somehow the sense of righteous indignation and hatred grows, and it hurts you. It's as if you pick up hot coals with your bare hands and throw them at your enemy. If the coals happen to hit him he will be hurt. But in the meantime, you are guaranteed to be burned." ~ Pema Chodron

but let's not forget

‎"When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, "Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping." To this day, especially in times of "disaster," I remember my mother's words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers – so many caring people in this world." ~ Fred Rogers (aka Mr. Rogers)

With love and deepest sympathy to the families and friends of the Aurora, CO victims.

Where's the Orla love??

2012-07-17T13:41:00.000-07:00

Correspondent Jen G is on the Orla scene in Detroit!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am an Orla Kiely addict--3 purses, 1 wallet, coffee mugs, bowls, the whole cheapie Target line of melamine bowls and trays from a few years back. So when I first learned about Orla (as I call her, since we are so close) coming to Bed, Bath, & Beyond in March and nearly peed myself. I began picking out paint colors for my bedroom to coordinate with her classic stem pattern.

When the day finally came along that BB&B was carrying Orla's stuff, I nearly peed myself again. I log onto to the BB&B website, surprised to see that Orla's magnificence wasn't plastered over the banner or even on the front page. Okay, so designer sheets aren't for everyone, I get it. I type Orla's name into the little search box, and what do I find?

2 comforters and 3 types of sheets, and 1 pathetic throw pillow.

Commence the freak out.

WHAT? THAT'S IT? WHERE ARE THE LAMP SHADES? THROW PILLOWS? BLANKETS? AREA RUGS? CAN'T YOU EVEN THROW A GIRL A LUGGAGE TAG OR COFFEE MUG FOR FUCK'S SAKE? COME ON!

BB&B is calling the line “Orla Kiely House.” House to me, means more than sheets and comforters. My house does not consist of bedroom. On Orla’s website, if you pull down the little tabby thingy labeled “HOUSE,” there are three choices: Bath, Kitchen, Living. So, BB&B, where’s the bathroom stuff? Kitchen? Living? Maybe it should be renamed “Orla Kiely Rented Studio with Shared Kitchen and Bath” or “Orla Kiely Room.”

May I also remind you that BB&B stands for Bed, Bath & BEYOND! Not only have your forgotten the Bath of this so-called-line, but you haven’t even REMEMBERED the BEYOND! Come on, BB&B! Why have you given Orla such a half-hearted commitment?

On Orla’s website, there are FOUR bedding collections, which are available in the UK only:

Notice the canisters on the bedside table? Yes, you could purchase those too if you wanted: if you live in the UK.

Here is a teeny, tiny sampling of her kitchen lines (note the plural):

Here is what BB&B offers:

Granted, I do appreciate that this is the only bedding that Orla offers us in the U.S. However, this is not a line. This isn't even a mini-line. It's a stretch to call it a sampling. It's 2 comforters and a few sheets. It sucks. And the prints aren’t even that interesting! The comforters are too loud and the sheets are too muted!

And have you see the pricing? $200 for a king-sized comforter? One can buy a designer named comforter at a large department store for that or less! Okay, so it’s Orla and she’s a designer. I just added all the bedding and shams for a Queen/Full, mind you, that are shown in that first picture. Total? $469.93! And you KNOW those 20% coupons will not be honored because it’s a designer brand!

Okay, so I don’t know for certain that the quality is less but this is usually how the designer at the big box discount store often works (and the online reviews state so). So I shall head to one of the BB&B stores to find out for myself, right? I am a fairly low maintenance girl (really I am); I don’t need the 2 milllion thread count sheets. So I typed in my zip code, a zillion stores in the Metro Detroit area popped up. However, upon closer inspection, I found this right above the store listings:

We were unable to locate a store with availability within 50 miles. You may enter different search criteria or please order online or call 1-800-GO BEYOND to place an order.

WHAT???? I CANNOT EVEN WALK INTO MY LOCAL BB&B STORE TO OGLE AND FONDLE MY DEAR ORLA? I CAN”T EVEN DRIVE WITHIN 50 MILES TO FONDLE? Do you mean to tell me that BB&B could not clear out a few of their Nautica / Laura Ashley outdated 80’s bedding in order to a few NEW items on a shelf? These stores are stocked to the RAFTERS! I concede that I live in the Midwest, but we have a Neiman Marcus, Saks, Nordstrom, Tiffany’s, Ferragamo, Louis Vitton, 2 (!) Georgio Armani, Lacoste, Burberry, and Lily Pulitzer just a mere 10 minutes away from the nearest BB&B! We are not total slouches here!

Is this how an American company treats our dear Orla? It's just like back in the 1800 and 1900's: "Irish Need NOT Apply."

And to add insult to injury, look closely at this photo:

Is that an Orla lampshade I see? A LAMPSHADE? Why BB&B, WHY would you place that in the photo if you have no intention of selling it?!? Is it just to torture me? Yes, just march me up to the top of the mountain to see the views, then march me back down and tell me, sorry, loser, NOT FOR YOU!

I would also like to add that if you wanted to replicate this exact bedding for your room, it would cost a FORTUNE!

I thought the point of offering Orla in BB&B to make it widely available AND affordable to us common, lowly, poor fashionistas who shop at places like BB&B and Target? If you are going to bring it to the masses, then BRING IT! If that Brita Wottle Bottle were available at BB&B, I would have stockpiled 5+ (so I could take a few with me in the rapture, you know) and written a Lynne-styled positive “freak out” post at how cute and fashionable my water bottle is! I would be the envy of my house (since all my neighbors and friends would have one too)!

I know I could turn this as a paranoid conspiracy of Orla’s anti-American leanings, but that is something that I am making up, and I much prefer to blame the big corporate American machine instead. SO SCREW YOU BB&B, you big box store who doesn't know taste and refined style when you see it! Go back to selling your ShamWOWs and Tervis Tumblers! I will be shopping Orla's summer sale on her US website and dream of the day when I, a lowly housewife from the Midwest, can ensconce myself in Orla for 7 hours of blissful sleep.

UPDATE: I just bought myself another purse to drag around all my kids' shit. And at 50% off!

Apologies for my SHOUTY CAPS, but when a girls needs to freak out, she needs to freak out.