MommyLoves To Chat

Not Yet

2012-08-30T15:06:00.001-07:00

As your independence from me looms like the dark before the dawn, I can't help but reflect on the exciting journey before you, and my new role as your Mom.

Thinking of your Graduation, as you make decisions for your future - as you pack to leave home and study, I imagine sparkling excitement in your eyes, and yes, a little fear, but if I have done my job by helping you prepare for your life away from me, I know you will make most of the right choices. I hope you learn from the wrong ones.

You will experiment with all kinds of new things, people and events. Always remember...Don't put anything up your nose that you don't want in your brain... Please choose as wisely as possible, as these experiments can affect the remainder of your life, and the lives of others.

Marrying these thoughts with my current reality, I can answer your question confidently, my son:

"NO! You can't have your iPod back until your 8th Grade English is above a C-!"

Love,
Mom

I Lost You!

2012-05-02T04:13:00.000-07:00

I hate it when I lose you! When I check Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Google+, LinkedIn, etc., and I don't see the avatar of my favorite contributors, I get a little panicky!

First rule of writing, blogging, social media chatting...DON'T CHANGE YOUR AVATAR ONCE YOU'VE ESTABLISHED AN AUDIENCE! It makes me a little crazy, and since I'm a functioning member of society with only a few neurotic peccadillos, I don't think it's just me. One of my favorite tweeters and Google+'ers has recently changed his avatar...an avatar that was very eye-catching, and now I can't find him with a quick review of my Twitter Stream. It only took me about a week to stop looking for him, and since my email is already the equivalent of the Autobahn, I'm not going back to his website, and signing up for email notifications of his posts! (No, I don't use lists...I use the Twitter Lottery - whoever is posting when I check Twitter won the 'MKJ saw your post' Lottery!)

I've Lost Him.

More importantly, He Lost Me! Just think of your favorite soda (okay, I'm showing my California accent...pop, if you will). What would you do if you were looking for a Pepsi, and couldn't find that familiar blue can anywhere, and your 2 yo was screaming in your ear, while pulling a clump of hair out right above that ringing ear? You'd just choose something else, or leave screaming yourself, right?!

One of my favorite Dad Bloggers recently asked his audience if they thought he should change his avatar since his daughter is now three (probably going on thirteen, because she told him to shave his beard), and the baby feet in his picture aren't current. I said very clearly, and as loudly as my ALL CAPS could get...NOOOOOOO!

Thank Goodness Michael Schmid of A Daddy Blog heard the outcry, and kept his baby and daddy feet avatar. He added some new pic's of his little girl (darling btw) to his homepage logo, google+ bar, and the like, but when I look for his Tweets, I find him, and feel safe and secure that the world is still orbiting the sun, and the dinosaurs are still extinct.

When you are first starting out, change away. Before you become more successful in your online presence, however, find the avatar that works for you, and stick with it until it no longer represents your brand at all - in other words...until your current brand dies, and a new brand rises from the ashes like a phoenix.

(Ladies who dye their hair, listen up...this also goes for suddenly going brunette when your avatar picture has always been blond!)

Anyone else feel strongly about their favorite people changing their brand image? Please share!

Hitting Negative Where it Hurts

2012-03-13T11:59:00.000-07:00

Like everyone around me, I have my good days and my bad. Most days I am a very positive, upbeat person, and I see the possibilities and goodness in those around me. There are days, however, when I'm not so positive.

I have had a string of six of those days:

Day 1 ~ Son #1 was punched in the face after teasing another kid.

Day 2 ~ Son #2 was told by a friend (in detail) about a great website called www.XXX___.com.

Day 3 ~ Woke up to dead car battery.

Day 4 ~ Received grades so far this trimester for Son #1.

Day 5 ~ Received grades so far this trimester for Son #2.

Day 6 ~ Woke up to the 21st straight day of Husband working from dark a.m. to dark p.m. because it's Harvest time.

I realized the negative vibe was spilling out of me with today's zinger. Son #2 was being teased by some kids at school, and he lost it and refused to do any more school work. Of course, Son #2 was the one who got in trouble, and while I was yelling at him that he needed to control his anger, I realized where the behavior had originated. Really, it was like I was slapped in the face with this realization, and that mental slap took it all away when I saw my son's face, and looked over to my other son to see him cowering at the homework table clearly saying to himself, "Please don't let her start on me next!" Okay, maybe some "Mom Guilt" is spilling out too, and it wasn't really that bad, but that is how it felt.

I took a deep breath, and called both my sons over to the couch. I apologized for yelling, and said, "Let's recap our week so far, and find out why we are all so tense."

I ticked off on my fingers the above six days events in greater detail, and then asked both boys, "So, how does that make you feel?" Stupid question, really, when their feelings were as clear as the scrunched up noses and seething eyes on their faces, but necessary to get them to verbalize it.

I asked them to close their eyes and take a deep breath. We all did that, actually, which started a good crack in the negative. To get that crack to grow into a chasm from which the negative would never recover, I ticked off on my fingers the above six days events a little differently:

Day 1 ~ Son #1 was very lucky the kid who punched him wasn't taller and stronger, otherwise the little red mark on his nose and under his eye would have probably been a broken nose and black eye. He is also lucky both kids' parents didN'T OVER REACT AND CALL THE SHERIFF! (deep breath) More importantly, Son #1 learned a very important lesson...DON'T TEASE! It's not nice, and the Karma hurts!

Day #2 ~ Son #2 is lucky he knows right from wrong, and has a good enough relationship with his Mother that he talks to her about such things before sneaking off to the computer (because he is not allowed to look up websites without my presence and approval), investigating them himself and having those images forever burned in his brain!

Day #3 ~ We are lucky we have AAA roadside assistance - and now know that it works out on a lonely road in addition to our very own garage - and are even more lucky to have wonderful friends who are willing to give rides to school anytime we need them!

Day #4 ~ We know where we need help now, don't we?!

Day #5 ~ We know where we need help now, don't we?!

Day #6 ~ 21 days down, 34 to go, and on April 15th we have a party, after which Daddy will crash and wake up a few days later...then we have him back for the rest of the year! Yes, my hubby is a Tax Accountant, and this is his harvest time!

After talking about this party for a while, and the goodies we will have...the movies we will watch...the Black Ops they will play (while mom is on the computer writing another blog post because she can't stand watching them play Black Ops), I turned to Son #2, and asked him, "So, how do you think we should handle this latest situation with you, the kids at school, and refusing to finish your school work?"

Since this son is the very dramatic one, and we have talked about this particular issue several times since first grade (he is now in fifth grade...) he had lots of advice to draw upon, and he is very lucky he did so now! When he spewed my former words back to me, head hung low, I said, "Thank you for listening. Now, what is going to be different the next time someone starts winding you up?!"

"Next time, I'll ask the teacher if I can move my desk before I let them get me so angry." he replied. (Why isn't he telling the teacher the kids are teasing him, you might ask?..."I've got 30 kids in this class to deal with...just get along!" is her reply. Again...deep breath...)

We all felt better after the camaraderie of our discussion, and agreed that we will still be under some stress until Daddy gets released from Tax Season, so we will need to be on our guard for negativity and the situations it creates.

We now have a daily saying in our household that comes from a very dear friend going through a very trying time in her life:

"Who we are is not made up of what happens to us, but how we deal with those events."

Now, we are hitting the negative with some positive whenever possible! Don't ask me about the conversation with Hubby the night Son #1 was punched...I just had to let that storm blow over, and not wake the kids.

How do you deal with the negative that creeps into your daily life when you least expect it?

Please share some of your ammunition.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UPDATE

Son #2 experienced the same teasing yesterday, and handled it exactly like he role-played with me, and ~~of course~~ surprisingly it worked! He came home a very happy and confident kid! Son #1 earned an A on his latest History test! (whew!)

Now I'm off to Home Depot to get some fence stakes and nails to fix the fence so the neighbor's non-neutered mastiff won't come through the fence, then our dog doors to try and mark our living room as his territory again...our two Aussies were quite offended. Please send positive thoughts out into the universe that I don't drown in the downpour... ヅ

No Easy Way

2012-02-17T17:18:00.000-08:00

Our household had two of everything...until last week. Two adults, two kids, two dogs and two cats. We have had the adults together for 28 years, the kids 13 and 10, the dogs 6 and 2 and both kitties only 4 months. As anyone with kids and/or animals knows...anything can and does happen.

You can imagine that a black cat (Andy pictured above) might not have the best luck to begin with, but add that he is a male and likes to explore at night, and you guessed it, he has been the first to go. The adults in this household are now dealing with their first experience of the kids' loss of a pet.

There are several schools of thought on explaining death to kids, but I'm here to say, there is no easy way.

I know people who have lied to their kids, and simply waited for the kid to notice the pet's absence, then told the child that they don't know what happened - Cowards way out if you ask me! The kids will always wonder what happened to their beloved pet. (I know...my husband wonders to this day where Brandy is, and whether his parents told the truth.)

I know people who take the animal away, or bury it before the child has a chance to see it and realize, then tell the kid that the pet died, and that is life, and, "I've taken care of it." - Another coward who can't deal with it him/herself, and can't imagine trying to help their kid through the grief.

Since my sons are old enough to understand, my husband and I just decided to calmly, kindly tell them we had some bad news, and spill it directly. This is the hardest thing I have had to do as a parent so far. I have to temper my own grief, and help my sons process theirs. It has not been easy, and it will certainly take time, but we believe that our children need to understand that death and sadness are part of life, and life will always go on. We still look for Andy to come in the dog door meowing up a storm looking for food, and my 10 year old still cries mostly at night when he thinks about Andy, but there is no easy way to get over the pain, anger, guilt and frustration that come with death and loss - you just have to feel your way through it.

I want to help my sons handle this part of life by feeling their feelings, and naturally letting them subside, rather than hiding or suppressing them and eventually, when they are adults (or teenagers for that matter) needing other coping mechanisms like drugs or alcohol to numb the pain they never learned to ride out on their own.

What do you think? Are we too harsh in telling it like it is and making them feel the pain? What have you done to help children cope with loss and death?

We're Testing the Social Media Machine

2010-09-02T09:55:00.000-07:00

We are offering a promotion/giveaway through the month of September in anticipation of the 2010 holiday season.

MommyLoves designed this promotion using some techniques we borrowed from the publishing industry PR world, and we are hoping it will be a hit with both our social network subscribers and business networking partners.

Here's how we designed our promotion ~
1) We contacted like, yet non-competing businesses in our network.
2) We searched for others to network with.
3) We asked for free products from specific businesses in one of the four categories we service.
4) We asked all our network, and the networks of the giveaway product businesses to promote the giveaway for the entire month through Facebook/Twitter/Newsletters/Blogs.
5) We are sending content about the giveaway product businesses to our social network subscribers.
6) We are asking our network partners to do the same with us.

We shall see if this social network blitz produces anything near our past advertising efforts.

Any social media test results for your own business promotion?

In the Face of Uncertainty

2010-08-20T11:00:00.000-07:00

Stay True.

The start of the new decade has not brought the uplifting promise I thought it would. Tragedies in the world, continuing health care challenges and economic uncertainty all seem to bring happiness to a halt. Happiness is . . . well, that is another subject. This is business.

MommyLoves to Chat has been silent this past summer. We have been clinging as best we could to the slippery sides of this current worldwide economic colander. The economy has always represented a colander to me, but now the drainage holes are much larger and there are many more of them, so that it looks more like a very thin cheese cloth with huge holes than a colander.

Yes, I love to cook.

Cheese cloth or colander, it doesn't matter when faced with day to day operations and the way we do business. We don't change our philosophy. We don't change the way we treat our customers. We don't change the quality of our products. When we lose a vendor, admittedly, it is hard to find another of the same quality, but it ultimately works out. When a wholesale customer goes out of business - that one is much more tricky, however we gain more retail business online. Our customers still tell the difference between our products and those of our competition, and our customers still talk to their friends about us. Buying is still personal.

There are many factors that determine whether or not a company stays in business, and stays larger and more solid than the holes in the colander. Integrity and Flexibility are probably the most important. Integrity can't be taught, it must be chosen. Social Media represents flexibility AND integrity to me. The more a company can get its message out to possible customers, the more successful it will become.

Social Media, for many people, is just a many headed gossip column. I won't let MommyLoves simply advertise to our followers in our Facebook page and Twitter feed, and try to hook followers and customers with the celebrities who have enjoyed our products. I want to impart our philosophy, integrity and quality to our current and potential customers, and let our products and customers speak for themselves.

In the face of uncertainty there is fear, yes. Fear then compounds the uncertainty. I must admit that I have cut back on many things because of the fear of slipping through one of those holes, and being sucked down the drain. But, fear will never penetrate my integrity.

What about you?

Am I Schizophrenic?

2010-05-11T14:37:00.000-07:00

Anytime I hear the word 'schizophrenic' the picture that comes readily to mind is that of a toddler screaming at the top of his voice "I'M NOT MAD" when his mom asks him why he is mad. As the mother of two boys, I must have seen that scene somewhere before?

Well, that mental picture has now been replaced with a new one that fits the definition for most adults - a society screaming for 'green' living while shopping at Walmart. Those two things just don't go together. Walmart = disposable, cheap consumption, and Green = conscious, environmental action. Which is really most important to us as a species . . . "disposable, cheap consumption, or conscious, environmental action"?

To which group should we as small business owners market and sell our products? In my opinion, the answer to this question will ultimately spell success or failure for future entrepreneurs and inventors, just as it will spell success or failure for our planet.

I prefer to think that strength and honor will win out, and that we will all realize that quality products manufactured in a socially and environmentally conscious manner are the only products welcome in our lives and homes. My business and my sanity might be in jeopardy, but I just can't accept that we are all doomed to live a Walmart based life that will turn us into a WALL-E society, no matter the current state of our planet

Has our society turned into that Toddler? . . . Ask yourself, "Am I Schizophrenic?"

Uncommon Political Common Sense Part 2

2010-04-03T13:16:00.001-07:00

Serving as a Federal or State Politician is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, serving their term(s), then going home and back to work.

I think the following should happen immediately:

1. No Federal or State Politician will receive any pension or tenure for his/her time in any political office. A Politician collects a salary while in office, and no pay from the American people when out of office.

2. Every Politician (Past, Present and Future) participates in Social Security. All funds in any political retirement fund move to Social Security immediately, and the accounts are then canceled.

3. Every Politician has the right to purchase his/her own retirement plan just like every other American Citizen.

4. No Political body can ever vote themselves any pay raise. The position held will receive a pay raise each year that is equal to 3%.

5. The only Health Care provided to any Politician is that which is also available to any other American Citizen.

6. Every Politician must abide by every law that is also imposed upon every other American Citizen.

7. Any contract made with any Politician during his/her time in office will be void as of 1/1/11, and no contract can be entered into during a Politician's time in office.

If you agree or disagree, please let me know. If you agree, please tell me how we can make these things happen immediately . . . not three years from now.

Uncommon Political Common Sense

2010-04-02T10:24:00.000-07:00

I know that the title of this post is oxymoronic - with the emphasis on "moronic" - but why does it have to be this way?

All your answers are flooding my Mac'Brain through it's wireless network. I know, it's the nature of the beast.

I'm too young to have seen Mr. Smith Goes to Washington when it was first released, but I can tell you that NOTHING in life is new! Cicero talked about it in ancient Rome, and The American Tea Party Movement talks about it today.

Before you judge me as some fringe political supporter, and disable my connection to your Mac or PC Brain by hitting that little 'x' in the corner, re-read the title of this post. I am referring to anything that is specifically 'Political'.

Unfortunately, the "Dictionary" link on my desktop (I have a paper version of the Dictionary on my bookshelf, but why get up and walk over there when I have it 'at my fingertips'?) lists five definitions of the word 'political', four of which support my sarcasm.

Is there anyone in existence anywhere in the United States of America that is truly Political: (adjective) of or relating to the government or the public affairs of a country?

Anybody?!

My kids would love to have a viable country to inherit in about 10 years.

Now That's Just Nasty

2010-03-20T08:58:00.001-07:00

We have all had disappointing experiences with businesses and customers alike. In an attempt to shed the nasty fingerprints of these people, we might be inclined to be nasty back. There are so many reasons to resist this temptation, but here is my recent experience of the most fundamental one.

A customer placed her order for a MommyLoves maternity shirt on a Monday, and expected to receive it by the following Friday to wear for her Baby Shower on Saturday. She did not indicate that she needed rush shipping, and our standard customer service timeframe is 1 - 2 business days to make the shirt, with 2 - 3 business days for Priority Mail delivery anywhere in the U.S. This customer called on Friday morning outraged that she had not received her shirt in time for the shower.

Since our shipping confirmation stated that the order was shipped on Wednesday, there was a chance that she would receive it with Saturday's mail, but with USPS there is no guarantee. I have had only one issue with USPS in the seven years MommyLoves has shipped orders through Priority Mail, so the chances were good she would get her order in time, but still not guaranteed.

The Conversation:

MommyLoves - "I am so sorry you have not received your order in time. If we knew you needed it by a certain date, we most certainly would have shipped it Express Mail rather than Priority."

Customer - "Your website said 1 - 2 business days to get an order out, and this is now four days! THIS IS THE WORST SERVICE . . . I WILL TELL ALL MY FRIENDS . . . NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR?"

MommyLoves - "I understand that you are disappointed, and I wish we could get all our customers orders to them in 1 - 2 business days using Priority Mail, but that timeframe refers to the amount of time it takes us to actually make your shirt. We create each shirt as it is ordered. However, the most important thing is to get you what you need by tomorrow. Can I give you another option that will allow you to wear your shirt at your baby shower tomorrow?"

Customer - "Sure. I don't know what you can do, but that would be great."

MommyLoves - "We can make your shirt right now, and ship it to you Express Mail overnight at no extra charge. If you receive both shirts, you can simply send one of them right back to us. We will only put a hold on your credit card to secure the cost of the extra shirt, and will not charge you unless the extra shirt is not returned to us after it is shown that it was delivered. This way, you are guaranteed to wear what you want to your shower, and you don't have to buy anything else."

The Outcome:

After ensuring that her mail delivery was prior to her baby shower, we did as we promised. Before ending the call, the customer was very happy and apologetic for her behavior and misunderstanding of our policies, and promised to let me know how her shirt was received at the baby shower. I had to take a deep breath after this call, because I had taken on some of the customer's anger and tried not to let it show.

On the following Monday, when we downloaded our new MommyLoves orders for the weekend, we had five new orders indicating that each new customer saw our products at the baby shower over the weekend and heard how we handled the new mom's difficulty. These orders more than made up for the extra $10 we spent for Express Shipping to get this customer her shirt in time for her event.

In all cultures and religions there is a teaching similar to Karma and The Golden Rule, so we all have a fundamental human experience of giving kindness and receiving it in return. I have had many similar conversations over my time filling orders for MommyLoves, and very few have resulted in a monetary repayment for my kindness. I know, however, that I would prefer my customers talk about the positive way these conversations ended or not talk at all about their experience with MommyLoves, rather than have a customer tell every pregnant woman she meets not to shop with us because of any disappointment with our service and the way it was handled.

If you are a customer, how do you treat a company you perceive to have given you poor service? If you are an owner or employee, how do you treat a customer who has a complaint?

I Love Dust

2010-02-13T13:45:00.000-08:00

Being the project oriented person that I am, I was walking past my television this morning, and tut tutting the accumulation of dust on the screen which sported finger painted pictures courtesy of my two sons. A great sigh of frustration and discontent involuntarily escaped me as I wearily went to get a dust rag and tackle the latest dusting project. Then it hit me. I was looking at this all wrong.

I actually love the dust in my house now. The wonderful accumulation of dust reminds me of all the fun and exciting adventures and games I have enjoyed with my boys, the wonderful nights snuggled to my husband watching a movie, the great walks I have taken with my dog and the many orders I have fulfilled for my MommyLoves customers - all of which I have chosen to do rather than dusting my house.

I will smile the next time I see the intricate finger paintings on the T.V. screen, and relive the good times between dustings. I wonder what amazing adventures await between now and then?

What have you chosen to do rather than dust?

Am I in the Twilight Zone?

2010-01-04T12:26:00.000-08:00

After surfing the channels last night, and stumbling upon at least four different, but equally idiotic, Reality Shows, it occurs to me that Reality TV Stars are only Acting through their lives for the time they are on TV and being paid.

I also found The Twilight Zone, and actually I prefer to be in the Twilight Zone. My friends and acquaintances will probably say I already live there. Yeah, The Twilight Zone was scary, eerie and out of the box, or rather out of your mind, but at least it was creative and felt, well, real.

I prefer to run my business from The Twilight Zone, too. Yes, it is scary, eerie and out of my mind, but again, creative and real. I have probably impersonated many of the characters in this series while sitting in front of my computer, or standing in front of our machines, too. I also hire people in The Twilight Zone - creative and real, and able to put up with or join me in my many character driven plots.

I have worked with many aspiring Reality TV Stars, and can usually spot them a mile away in the heavy fog. These are not the people I want helping my customers, via email or phone, because they worry more about looking like a Kardashian than being a happy, helpful MommyLoves team member. So, starting this new year, new decade, I have one question for you:

Do you surround yourself with aspiring Reality TV Stars, or do you live in The Twilight Zone?

What will you choose?

2009-12-31T09:23:00.000-08:00

I saw a version of this statement on an small, foothill town Elementary School billboard 20 years ago. It has been said countless times in all languages for centuries, but remains the creed of a character driven life:

"It is our choices, not our talents that make us who we are."

I hope you choose courage, compassion and character now and every day you breathe, and surround yourself with people you hold accountable to do the same. If we all live this way, think of the things in our society that will disappear, and imagine the new and amazing things that will surround us.

Start today, start right now, don't wait for midnight to make a resolution.

Time is . . .

2009-12-29T10:11:00.000-08:00

Yes, we have all heard, and probably lived by the saying, 'Time is Money'. If you are a business owner, or manager, you certainly hope your employees and vendors live by it, but how can you be sure with this wonderful thing called the internet?

I am constantly amazed when I check the site stats of MommyLoves.com and I see all the visitors (both unique and repeat) browsing our site at work. State organizations, Federal organizations (including the Pentagon) and Fortune 500 companies all have employees visiting and buying from MommyLoves.com - a maternity and family novelty apparel company. I can almost guarantee that our site is not a matter of National Security - there was that one time that someone from Canada wanted to buy wholesale products from us for a supposed store in Iran for delivery on the anniversary of 9/11 in 2006, but that was "Kiss My Bump", not the "TwoPeas" design purchased by someone at the Pentagon. One of our competitors, by the way, had no qualms filling that order, while we called the FBI and said 'No Thank You' to the business on principle alone. Two weeks later, suspected Al Qaeda members were arrested in Qatar with 10 lbs. of explosives and maternity clothing . . . at least it wasn't ours!

Anyway, you are reading this, so I will give you more than your money's worth - unless your employees give you reason to doubt their judgement, trust that they are searching on your behalf, and that their searches and purchases will benefit your business. If you don't, our business will suffer, so Thank You!

Here's to another successful year coming to an end, and another wildly wonderful one being born ~

See you in the next decade.

Holiday Madness!

2009-12-04T13:02:00.000-08:00

The Holiday Madness has begun!

It is very hard to resist buying everything you see for your baby's first holiday! Once your little bundle turns 5 and your house is bursting with legos or doll clothes, and never played with toys, you no longer have that urge to 'pick up just one more thing' - that's what Grandparents are for. Those very same Grandparents are probably the ones who continued the toy gluttony that got you into this mess, literally! Raising the Grandparents takes the same skill set as raising your munchkin - patience and consistency. My In-Laws are of the mindset that if they don't buy everything my boys want, my boys won't love them.

At least that is what it seems?! Luckily, I had a glimpse of my toy-related future when my first born was about a year old. Sitting up and interacting with his environment was the signal for Grandma and Grandpa to buy every supposedly fun toy on the market! That Christmas when my son was 16 months old was the worst of my life! Really! He had a meltdown after the third present. Then dad had a meltdown, then it was my turn. After our nap, we put away the rest of the unopened presents for another day. We actually dolled them out, one a month until they were gone. The more difficult task was dealing with the culprits in this caper - the Grandparents.

We laid down the law that they could give only TWO presents per holiday - including birthdays. The first holiday we got, "We forgot!" The second holiday we got, "We couldn't resist, look how much he loves them!" Then I got nasty. I told the smothering, aged children that if they did not keep to the two present limit, they would not be allowed to give any more presents for the next two years, and if they still tried to give presents, I would confiscate them and burn them no matter how much my soon-to-be spoiled brat son cried! That finally hit home, because they know me too well, and they kept to the limit. That is until Little Brother came along.

Needless to say, I have had to be vigilant at my post every holiday for the past 11 years - yes my oldest just turned 11, and those pesky, wannabe rebellious teenagers I call In-Laws have given me my best preparation for Middle School. MIDDLE SCHOOL! How the hell did I get here again?!

Supporting Strong Women

2009-11-11T09:26:00.000-08:00

We have all had adversity in our lives. I have never met a woman (or man for that matter, but they don't talk about it as much as we females) who had perfect parents or perfect health or perfect childhood memories or perfect children. Some of us have more adversity to overcome than others, of course, and we all deal with it in our own ways.

Yesterday, I had the chance to reconnect with a friend and local networking buddy. I found out she has breast cancer, and just had a lumpectomy. This hit very close to home of course with my recent encounter with this disease through my mother-in-law, and I must admit that I am scared for my friend. Cynthia is young . . . a little younger than me in fact and I'm on the backside of my 40's. She has two young girls, and lots of friends and support. At night, however, she still has to sit with her own thoughts and fears for her life and the lives of her children. I can't help but put myself in her shoes and feel fear, but at the same time strength and resolve.

There are countless organizations supporting every disease known to mankind, and there are also countless organizations supporting women and their children. Cynthia and her amazing friends have decided to start a non-profit organization supporting other strong women who are celebrating their lives while battling disease, and they have kindly asked me to take part in my own small way. I am extremely honored, and will devote my time in honor of Jean Johnson, my mother-in-law. Jean went well beyond her given title in my life - she treated me as her own daughter, and that made all the difference in my life, and the lives of my sons. Please keep watch and visit often for the details as they unfold, and we start promoting this amazing new organization. We all need and give support.

What strong woman needs your added strength today? Is it you? Then just ask.

MommyLoves . . . everything you send me, apparently.

2009-11-09T14:41:00.000-08:00

Many companies have now found the very effective, inexpensive, targeted advertising programs on the internet . . . bloggers. MommyLoves has received countless requests for product submissions from, specifically, Mommy Bloggers. The request usually goes something like this:

"Hi, I'm . . . and I have a blog called . . . and have been blogging for . . . I have . . . followers, and I found your site, and love your products, and feel they would be perfect for my followers. I would love to do a review of your products if you will send me a . . . design in size . . . and I can do a review about how wonderful your products are."

Now, I love flattery like the next gal, but I know a pitch for free stuff even when it's coated with honey and dropped in my inbox. I have sent lots of free merchandise to blog requests, and enjoyed the benefits of increased traffic and even a few orders. I am careful, however to review the blogs beforehand, and ensure that they are not simply "review mills" that turn out reviews like breeders turn out puppies. A MommyLoves product would just become one more tree in the forest of reviews on those sites, so I look for blogs that actually have content and discussions other than reviews. I am still sending free stuff, but I ensure that the content and tone of the blog reflects that of MommyLoves. Hopefully, by doing this, I am also supporting bloggers and their followers who can think for themselves. I haven't had a bad review yet for MommyLoves products, and I will continue to tell myself that this is because we have such wonderful products, not simply because the reviewer got free stuff. This article in The New York Times says it all.

I remember well my shock when I first started MommyLoves in 2003, and interviewed a self-employed Marketing person intent on becoming a MommyLoves vendor who suggested that I hire Stay At Home Moms (SAHM's) to just visit chat rooms and tout my products without ever having worn one. Did the light bulb just go on over some of your heads? Say it isn't so?! This Marketing person also told me that all the "big" companies do this all the time when they want to promote a new product. I'm glad I can truthfully say that size does not matter to me that much.

In essence, we can go back to the good old rule of "don't believe everything you read." I still trust the friends, family and neighbors whose facial expressions I see regularly much more than some witty, trendy cyber-typer who drops into my computer daily with supposed reviews and recommendations. I can "x-out" of one, and only wish sometimes that I could "x-out" of the other.

Do you buy based on ads?

2009-11-06T14:36:00.000-08:00

I can't believe it has been so long since I have blogged. Too much has happened since April, and blogging was the last thing I needed to do. Unfortunately, we lost Grandma in September to Breast Cancer. Grandma (aka my wonderful Mother-in-Law of 30 years) had a Mastectomy in April, and was undergoing low dose chemo when tumors grew on her spine.

Don't talk to me about Health Care unless you want to see steam come out my ears!

What's up with all the T.V. ads for drugs? I mean Pharmaceuticals, of course! Since around February, 2009, I have been noticing a change in T.V. ads. How many people are taking drugs for their Liver, Prostate and ED to name a few that allows Pharmaceutical Companies to make money buying T.V. ads? I mean, these drugs can't be bought over the counter. People need to see the ad on T.V., then either make an appt. with their Doctor, or wait until their shortly thereafter regularly scheduled Doctor appt., and specifically ask their Doctor for that particular drug. How many people visit their Doctor on a regular basis? I know that Grandma was visiting the Doctor (several Doctors in fact) every week almost since April, but unless you are currently being treated for a life-threatening disease, why would you visit your Doctor regularly enough to request some of the drugs being advertised on T.V.?

This thought process then led me to think about advertising in general. I mean, do you actually brush your teeth with Colgate Total because Brooke Shields claims to on T.V.? Would you join Jenny Craig because of the success of Valerie Bertinelli, or stay away from Jenny Craig because of the lack of long term success of Kirstie Alley? (I worked for Jenny Craig for about six years right after I left college, but that is another story . . . )

Luckily MommyLoves has had to do very little advertising to stay in business and grow. We have purchase three half page ads in pregnancy related magazines in our nearly seven years in business, and we're still kickin'. These ads were directly targeted for specific holidays to promote our holiday maternity designs. Our growth and popularity long term rely not on advertising, but on networking and marketing. I would trust my girlfriend's recommendations over Brooke Shields' any day, and millions of women agree with me! Hence the popularity of blogging, which is another way MommyLoves has grown. Satisfied customers blogging about our products.

Why then do companies advertise?

Do you buy based on ads?

I will listen to an ad only if I see a new product or service that interests me. I won't buy it based on the advertising, I will ask around and do some research first. So, I guess advertising is profitable for a company when they release a new product or service? So, I guess we come back to the drugs. Are there that many people taking prescription drugs that the Pharmaceutical Companies need to compete with general market ads? More importantly, are all those people driving? I hope they aren't driving while on Viagra or Cialis . . . that could be dangerous.

Those Bootstraps still work!

2009-04-07T10:22:00.000-07:00

With the Holiday Season finally in the distance of our rear view mirror, I am no longer using that dirty word "Economy". In the recent times of easy money and going public, many small businesses forgot some of the fundamentals of pulling themselves up by the "bootstraps". Here are a few things that are helping us survive and hopefully thrive during any economic time.

1. A simple thing like printing your own business cards on "clean edge" cards can save lots of time and money, AND you can change things "on a dime" as your business changes. I mean really, how many business cards do you hand out these days? If you are going to an event, print up a bunch, otherwise just have about 20 on hand at all times. You can do the same with letterhead. Have a master letter template with your letterhead/logo saved on each desktop, and you can print whatever correspondence you need without having to put in special paper. Most correspondence is done via email/LinkedIn/Twitter/FaceBook anyway.

2. Do you really need a Webmaster who is the only one capable of updating your website? Okay, if you are Target, maybe so, but anyone who can create a word document that includes a picture can create a website these days. Use one of the drag-and-drop software programs available. I personally use Homestead.com. With both MommyLoves.com and SayBump.com we have over 200 items for sale, and I and my team have created and continue to update every one. Okay, there is one catch - TIME! Even this we can handle with one late night every six months at most. With that dirty word I mentioned above, we all have a little extra time, even though we are a little panicked at what we should be doing to increase sales.

3. Advertising vs. Marketing. The age old debate. I have tried both. They both work, but one has long term results, and one is only as good as your last ad. Oops, kinda gave it away. I have a very good friend - someone I have never met in person - who has taught me a lot about Marketing, and better yet, has done an amazing Marketing job for my company. The Marketing groundwork Laurie Wing of ParentBlast.com created for MommyLoves starting two years ago is helping us stay alive and well during these difficult times. We receive requests for samples from bloggers every week. The blogs that have decent traffic get a sample, and the write-up always increases our traffic and sales. We have received requests from television shows to provide samples for their audience during a taping. Again, increases in traffic and sales, AND more blog requests. The buzz on social networks mentions MommyLoves at least once a month, and we always receive a boost in traffic, and more importantly orders during this time. We also use Constant Contact to keep former customers coming back through our offer of a special discount, or just imparting fun ideas to harried Moms and Dads. As long as people keep talking about you, especially on this amazing world wide web, people can buy from you. Just make sure you have the best product/service going so they actually have something to talk about. I have spent more money on a few ads than I have spent on all my Marketing. The only thing is, you have to be very specific and very patient! One caution - use a small marketing firm that focuses only on you. Don't buy into a group campaign. Your chances are very slim that you will get noticed, or even get anyone to return your phone calls.

4. Use other small business resources. MommyLoves does not have any employees. MommyLoves has only vendors. We support our local businesses - both geographical and internet. We do business with small businesses from South Carolina to New Jersey to Australia, and we take advantage of the talent in our own backyard by giving work to other Moms and Dads we know.

Now, I know that most of the things I mention above will affect other small businesses like web developers and the like, but there will always be companies that cannot do what we do. Look around you, and see what you can save. Who knows, maybe I will become a web developer in my next career life with my new skill at SEO. Oh yeah, we haven't paid for SEO either. We just keep our website fresh, and were the first on the internet for our keywords, so we are always in the top 5 if not #1.

Hope those boots stay up!

Mary

Are you the owner?

2008-11-05T09:16:00.000-08:00

I recently had a customer ask me during a phone conversation if I was the "owner". "Yes," I replied, "Why do you ask?"

She told me that I "sounded like an owner". This made me stop and think.

The structure I have created for MommyLoves is very different from the average American small business. Everyone who works for MommyLoves does so in their own office. Everyone who works for MommyLoves is self employed. Everyone who works for MommyLoves is an "owner".

How can we do this you ask? Well, we hire other businesses to do work for us. Tina does our graphic design, Laurie does our PR, Angie does our alterations, Annette does our phone work for sales, Lisa makes our diaper bags - just to name a few. We have people who can help us in our production office during peak seasons, and all these people reside in my neighborhood and across our country.

I created this business when my sons were 18 months and 4 years old, and my goal was to be able to run my business while I stayed home and raised my sons. It seemed like an insurmountable task trying to design and manufacture clothing in my home office, but I had learned when my second son was born that I could do anything! (More on that in another blog.) I never wanted to go to an office away from home, and be in some meeting when my kids got home from school. Having employees come to my home every day for their jobs would not be feasible, so my solution was to hire other like-minded self-employed people. With all the technology we have available, those people can be anywhere in the world.

You see it in T.V. commercials, you see it in chat rooms, you see it in blogs - people in their home offices or spare bedrooms conducting business around the world. Right here in Northern California, in the foothills of the Sierra Mountains, MommyLoves has received orders from such faraway places as The Northern Territories of Canada, Malta and Norway. My kids get a geography lesson with each new order, and each new order comes right here to my little Mac. The order then goes across the country to be filled, or stays right here for my UPS driver to pick up. Either way, an "owner" has filled it. No one who works for MommyLoves simply puts in a day at the office doing a job! We all go way beyond that. Our days are more like "split shifts" where we work maybe 6 hours, then pick up the kids from school or meet them at the bus stop, then get them a snack while they do their homework, then make dinner, then work a few hours more before going to bed. I can email Tina, Laurie or Angie at midnight, and I usually get an answer back at 12:01 a.m.

Now, I know many businesses like Restaurants or Grocery Stores cannot operate this way, but many others can. This is not the future of the American Workforce. This IS the American Workforce. Wherever you work, can you honestly say you "sound like an owner"? If not, the customer can hear it and may take their business elsewhere, and in these economic times we all know what happens next!

Through My Internet Travels

2008-10-16T12:00:00.000-07:00

Creating an internet based business from what was once a passion is very difficult, but easier than I thought.

Hello Everyone ~

My name is Mary Johnson, and I founded and manage MommyLoves.com and SayBump.com. I didn't do this alone, however. There are many people from all over the world who helped me, and continue to support and encourage me, as I do them. I would love to share this journey with anyone who wants to listen, and possibly learn, and maybe we can contribute to the unique journeys undertaken by Moms, Dads and those who love them.

Visiting this blog will introduce you to many of the people that contribute to my journey every day. Some are in my physical neighborhood, and many are in my internet neighborhood, but all are doing amazing things with their lives.

From doing their best to raise their own kids to doing their best to promote family products on such networks as ABC, Lifetime and Discovery Health, we all have one thing in common . . . we love to chat about our families and our businesses.

So, sit down (like you aren't already?), buckle up (haven't yet bought the latest buckling office chair for those of us who get very animated when we type?) and enjoy the ride!